I'm REFUSING To Let My Sister See Her Kids And My Family Is Turning On Me r/Relationships

[@Castycast]

"My sisters (35) kids." Really made me double take for a second when only passively listening to audio

[@Pyrieltmj]

Same. I was like wtf until I read 35f

[@Regrettable-Username]

Thought someone was trying to write up a Sims game as a Reddit post or something.

[@chelseapthib36]

Lmao me too... total WTF moment

[@maxamillion26093]

Every child deserves parents but not all parents deserve children

[@badkitty4922]

I absolutely agree with you. I'm of similar mind when I say just because you CAN have children, it doesn't mean you SHOULD. I'm 53 and when I was in my twenties, between surgery to halt cervical cancer, and being physically abused while during my one and only pregnancy, the prognosis was that I was going to be childless. It hurt for years, especially when I saw the worst parents and how they treated their little ones. I came to peace with it figuring not everyone is meant to be a parent. But, yes, seeing trash people just being the worst parents boils my blood.

[@idonthavegoodhumor]

it can be the other way soemtimes you know the 19 year old who killed his entire family because they cut him off financially so yes ur right but sometimes that can be wrong

[@hotarubinariko]

@@idonthavegoodhumor yeah... but like 99/100 chance is that kid with different parents with the same scenario wouldn't yield same results. No kid gets to that level without something being off about the parenting. That could be anything from indulgence, ignoring concerning behavior/refusing treatment, neglect, abuse or a combination of them. It's rare enough for kids to kill their parents but a scenario of a genuinely healthy family and well patented kid murdering their family/parents is one in a trillion chance. Not impossible but almost impossible.

[@idonthavegoodhumor]

@@hotarubinarikostill doesn’t change the fact this isn’t always right, have you heard of the 19 year old that killed his entire family cuz of money

[@idonthavegoodhumor]

@@hotarubinarikoand yes i do agree, majority times it s true but we keep on forgetting how some children are true evil, idk how i didn’t see this at all

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

Story 1: If the kids don’t want to see her, it would be wrong to force them. There’s a reason she lost custody. Also, “They shouldn’t grow up without their mother”, then she shouldn’t have abandoned them. I think OP should give her information on therapy and tell her that if she ever wants a chance to see them again, she needs to go. It doesn’t mean she’s guaranteed to see them again, but at the very least it gives her a way out. Even though she’s unlikely to take it. Story 2: Nah. They didn’t invite you and still wanted their gift. Thank god you didn’t already give them the gift. Because otherwise they would never have to pay because it was a gift. OP should have been clear how much it costed if it went up to 2000$

[@brigidtheirish]

"They shouldn’t grow up without their mother." And that attitude is why the family court system is so badly biased in favor of mothers. Even if the father would be a better primary guardian.

[@alexandermccalla5098]

They felt close enough to ask for free material but you’re not family enough to be part of the wedding? This grinds my gears.

[@jamestown8398]

They never intended to invite OP or his Wife to the wedding. It was all just a con to sucker OP out of free goods and services.

[@meganwarren221]

Also... the last comment talked about not taking back a wedding gift. That is bull. The gift had not been given. If I got a cousin a fancy dishwear set for their wedding and they decided not to invite me, I would not be giving them that gift just because I already spent the money. Nope, not happening.

[@zerobolt9506]

"Ah he said it he said it" as stated by Peter Griffin...sorry I had to 😔

[@Mewse1203]

When OP #1(Sister) said that the older sister was "like a 2nd mom" my first thought was "parentification?" After OP#2's post and update, I'm pretty sure that's what happened. Their parents are awful.

[@carolroberts4614]

I am so glad to see the updates on this story, and that everything is working out for them. I remember story 2 when it first came out, and also story one without knowing they were connected! I agree with you about the parents. Cold-hearted, both of them.

[@zerobolt9506]

I'm glad she managed to prevent 1st OP from ending up like she did & get out of her dark path, here's hoping she keeps getting better from here on.

[@paytynbutler2007]

}p p

[@carlrood4457]

Yeah, I'm guessing being the oldest girl to crappy parents led to her taking on a mom role, then having three kids of her own, and it kind of broke her. She might resent the other siblings who seem to have their lives together since they'd all had discussed taking in the two youngest and simply chose the closest with the most space.

[@TriXJester]

Story 1 before update: They were legally removed from their mother due to neglect. So it is actually not up to the OP, the mom, or the kids. It's up to the courts. If the mom wanted to see them, then she should of filed with the courts for legal visitation.

[@DaniS398]

No. Op legally adopted them which means mom lost her parental rights. She no longer even has the right to petition the courts for custody.

[@TriXJester]

@@DaniS398 Missed that part, so yeah, that mom can kick rocks

[@low-keydrama1260]

Story 1: OP didn’t turn her kids against their bio-mom. Bio-mom did that all by herself. Actions have consequences. Especially after that sickening Zoom call. Especially after that “What do I have to apologize for?” also dang those parents suck. I’m glad OP, her kids, and her brothers are close. I’m glad the sister is getting better. Hope she keeps getting better and doesn’t relapse. I hope they have many many years of wonderful times. If your parents were awful to you and you end up having kids, break the cycle of abuse.

[@owl7072]

Story 1: "You can give them back, I'm out of prison now" it wasn't just going to prison that got your kids taken, it was what you did before that landed you in prison to begin with as well as _abandoning_ them for _two weeks_ to do so. Her own children want nothing to do with her, she needs to take a hint. Edit: "It's what's best for them, they shouldn't grow up without their mother" then she shouldn't have abandoned them for drugs. What's best for them is her staying far, _far_ away. Edit 2: Man so pretty much that whole family except the first Op and the brothers are just really shitty people

[@pippo17173]

Explains the sister being a POS. The op and her brothers are very lucky.

[@brigidtheirish]

It's not surprising in the slightest, unfortunately. That attitude of "kids need their mothers" regardless of how horrible she is, is *really* deeply entrenched.

[@alicewilloughby4318]

OP is their mother now - and a lot better than the one they were born to, from the sound of things!

[@samoanjoseph1457]

The part that got me was "I'll call the cops and tell them you kidnapped my kids". You mean the cops who will immediately notice you're fresh out of prison? The same cops who will quickly figure out you're reporting the sister who legally adopted your kids, when there was essentially no one to kidnap them from? Those cops? I don't think that will go the way you expect.

[@wmdkitty]

They _have_ a mother: OP.

[@fanendey]

Story 2, last comment: wouldn't be reddit without some good old victim blaming! Come on man, have some compassion for OP, they essentially got scammed out of their money, it is a business transaction, not even a "trade" anymore (the printing work for an invitation). The bride can't expect all of the work for free...

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

And a "small wedding" that requires banners and cutouts? Get outta here with that noise.

[@Tammohawk1]

Sister fell and bumped her head knowing that her younger sister has adopted her children. She's very well aware of the fact that she has no rights to those kids any longer. Holy Cow those parents. Original OP has my respect. She not only has adopted 3 of her sisters kids, she took in her twin brothers, and then had a baby of her own!

[@Celery459]

She is a superhero. 😥 Those kids are so lucky to have her.

[@GBunnyG]

There's some Reddit stories that stay with you, even if you don't remember full details. The fact that the Woman Who Adopted 3 Littles from Her Sister Who Didn't Think She Should Apologize is also the sister of the Twin Boys Abused by Parents Living with Wholesome Sister and There's a Pineapple Can and Siblings Talking to Each Other on Reddit Instead of 2 Feet Away?!?!?!? I cry.

[@carolroberts4614]

The pineapple can, yes!!

[@kimberlyterasaki4843]

Holy shit, I remember both of those stories separately but knowing they come from the same family?! Wow. Makes sense but is super sad too

[@macylouwho1187]

That “family doesn’t define you” comment made me cry a little. Not happy, but mournful tears. I can’t tell you how many times people judge other people for who they are related to. Literally the day before yesterday I was out in front of my house putting up more of our home haunt Halloween display and we get frequent stoppers because of it-people want to talk about it or praise it as cool and some ask to walk through during set up. A couple walking by stopped to chat as I put together one of the props. It suddenly dawned on me that this was the mother of my long time middle school boyfriend and her husband. The one who absolutely hated me and treated me disdainfully like I was trash not good enough for her son because of my family. The woman practically sneered at me when I was a young girl the 3 years that I dated her son, she didn’t want me in her house and never once offered me anything when he asked me over there. Her son was always fed at mine and given drinks. Not so much as a glass of water was offered to me (extremely rude in American society). And she would only stress that she wanted me gone by a certain time (usually soon) and say nothing else. She thought he could do so much better than me because they were “society” with a nice house and cars. He was a cutie, all of the girls were crazy about him. She wanted him to get rid of me and she always made that quite clear. So present day this is all dawning on me. Who she is, how differently she’s treating me now. Singing my praises over what I do for the public and complementing me on my cool stuff. The whole time I’m like “does she not know who I am?” I don’t even know why but I’m shrinking inside, really just hoping that she doesn’t realize who I am and start treating me accordingly like garbage. I thought I was past this crap, I’m a really strong definite person. But I felt like I was 12 years old again, waiting to be treated as “less than” because of my sh-tty family. I told my husband all this later, explained which house she lived in etc so he could get a sense of who I was talking about. He figured out where I meant (small town) and said something that struck me. “You know that our house is three times bigger than hers, right? We have a city block of land and she’s got one itty bitty lot that her house pretty much covers. Our garage is bigger than her house. She doesn’t have anything over you anymore, baby. Stop feeling bad about yourself.” And he was right. Although what we have or who we are related to shouldn’t define us anyway, right? But funny how it sometimes does anyway, fair or unfair. People are so fricking shallow sometimes. What strikes me is that that b-tch said she’s coming to our opening night to see everything and will likely eat the free food that we hand out to the crowd and drink the beverages available at my expense-when there was a time that I wasn’t good enough to be offered a dam- free glass of water in her home. Funny, isn’t it? Just really sad to me. 😭

[@steampunkpixie2643]

I just hope you where a better person to her when she came to the opening night. Being the bigger person can feel really good.

[@ArcanineEspeon]

@@steampunkpixie2643 True, and you probably will be proven correct here. But I'm still daydreaming about the look on that woman's face if Macylouwho were to tell her she, specifically, can't have any free food.

[@katwiltz1134]

Oh sweetie it is only sad to you because you have not seen your kids grow up you haven't had the opportunity to offer your kids friends amenities that were withheld from you and you'll see that this woman is missing something somebody made her feel the little when she was growing up and she turned around and did that to you don't let it keep on put it to bed and yes it would be nice keeping up with the Joneses but when you're made to feel like you're nothing because you have nothing it means that you weren't raised in your family with pride in yourself don't let another generation grow up confined and constrained let them grow out you go around pulling out the bad weeds as you plant the flowers in your own garden

[@terramarini6880]

Hoping you were gracious, offered her food and beverage and most importantly asked after the old BF. "How is he? I haven't seen him since school. I didn't clock who you were the other day until after you'd gone. Who am I? Macylouwho, don't you remember me?" And just smiled and offered a refill.

[@macylouwho1187]

@@terramarini6880 They were out on a walk for health and kept on going. They did come down and eat and drink the night of Halloween with everyone else and I was welcoming as I am to everyone who comes. They had BBQ pulled pork sandwiches which I had out in a big roaster oven on a self serve food stand and spiked apple cider at the coffin bar Hubbs built for our skeleton bartender animatronic. I did not say who I was, she might actually know as it is a small town. I don’t know, and I’m over it now. It just got to me for a moment because she treated me like a cockroach invading her house when I was a kid. I guess it left me with raw emotions that I didn’t know that I still had until I saw her face to face. I’m probably just being a big baby and I’ll get over it. It can be rough growing up poor and having people look at you like you aren’t worthy though. Like our worth is based on what we own.

[@Weirdandwonderfull19]

The end of Story 1 made me tear up. What beautiful hearted people with a beautiful family. They have all been through so much and it's so nice to see them coming out of it and doing better. The love in the post 🖤💜. Story made me happy, there are some amazing people in this world 🖤💜.

[@twentyfiveyears5010]

It seems like the sister (first OP) is called Kalani and If I ever meet someone with that name they better be ready for a big hug from this stranger (even if it's a different Kalani!) She takes in her sister's 3 kids, then takes in her 2 brothers and is so humble about it she says "it's nice to have some extra hands around the house." Wow, just wow.

[@PonderingStudent]

It honestly seems amazing that she turned out to be such a kind and together person with parents like that. Frankly, its surprising that only one of the kids ended up a drug addict or otherwise non-functioning adult after growing up in that family.

[@Mimikinn]

Well, Kalani is a Hawaiian name and it’s a very popular one so I imagine you’ll be hugging a lot of people lol.

[@zerobolt9506]

@@PonderingStudent I can only think that before the oldest sister went down her spiral that she managed to basically raise OG OP enough that she turned out OK, but wasn't strong enough to do the same for herself, glad she's now getting the help she needs

[@Streetwisefirst]

Story 2: I love how they didn’t invite the wedding and still expected to get things for free. Charge them for the full amount

[@dionysus_adores]

Ikr "we're only doing family and close friends." Op is their cousin who was gonna do work for free. Op is family, but not invited to the wedding even though they're doing work for free...smh

[@GMAMEC]

I wouldn’t believe the nerve until something similar happened to me. I likely wouldn’t have attended, but it is just a common curtesy.

[@nataliereeves3594]

Entitled much? They don't consider them family but still expect freebies? They are greedy, horrible people. Also, set the record straight with family and fiance. You don't know what lies have been told.

[@simac8396]

Parents like this disgust me. When you have children feeding and clothing them untill the reach adulthood is the BARE MINIMUM you have to do. Children owe you nothing just because you didn't let them starve.

[@owl7072]

Story 2: No because it's the way they had them do all this, spending thousands in the process, and then uninvited them without even saying anything while still expecting them to bring the stuff they worked on _without even paying for it._ If you have the money for it, what's so bad about paying now unless you never planned to pay to begin with 🤨 and if you don't yet but will soon, why the anger 🤨

[@You_said_what1]

Not mentioning the parents says EVERYTHING we need to know

[@sylviajones6745]

How on earth did OP, in the 1st story come out so normal. I'm so surprised and very happy that she could show her twin brothers how good family life could be. It changed the way they thought and will be able to be great parents or just good people. I could just hug them all.

[@samssams666]

Well no wonder the oldest sister ended up in a shitty situation, her parents didn't give a fuck and she felt she had no one in her corner. I feel bad for the siblings and those poor kids.

[@zerobolt9506]

I'm glad she's doing better now, let's hope it continues

[@middaydraws3379]

Stories like this always piss me off because there are always those people who choose to ignore the past. She abandoned them to do drugs and then the first thing she wanted to do when she got out of prison wasn't get a job but to uproot the lives her kids have. Unless she's gone to rehab while in prison and has shown that she's staying away from drugs I wouldn't let them near her especially when she was in jail. "What's best for them, they need their mother" except they have their mother and it's the one who took them in not the one who abandoned a fucking 3 month old. Edit: 1: The fact that she didn't think she had anything to be sorry about and that the first thing she did when she saw OP monitoring the Zoom call makes me think that she planned on convincing the kid that OP is the reason why she left them. There is no real reason to be pissed that someone is there as support. Does she even remember how many kids she has? Edit 2: I can see why the sister turned out the way she did considering how they're treating their youngest sons. Add on the fact that they're the ones pushing for OP to give back the kids shows that they should have never had kids in the first place. These people deserve to be homeless and alone. Edit 3: The siblings that have actually stuck together and taken care of each other is so wholesome. I'm so glad that OP kept the kids and didn't give into her parents' teaching. Edit 4: I'm glad that the sister is getting help and bettering herself as well as her relationships with her family. It seems once all the siblings were out of the hands of the parents and cut off things got better because they cut off the infection.

[@vanzy01]

👍

[@stillvisibletoallusers]

This was my exact thought process listening. Lol.

[@zerobolt9506]

@@stillvisibletoallusers same as well 😂, funny but true, here's hoping that the parents don't dig their claws back into the oldest, she made her own mistakes, but you can't convince me the parents didn't have anything to do with it & it's lucky she managed to not only step back into the light from her dark path, but that she was also able to help OP not end up the way she did, OP said it herself that she had basically raised her, cause she saw her as a mother figure.

[@zoe9190]

I would of referred her back to the court system if she wanted her kids back. She has to prove it and the kids have to want to go back. Take it back, she adopted the kids, so sis either personally gave up her rights or her rights were void due to the treatment of her kids. Still would tell her take me to court, noone will take your case

[@photofreak56]

I work with kids as a teachers aid. The school I work at has a lot of foster kids and you can tell who's parents are trying to fix their issues and who will never do so. The kids who's parents lost them due to the pandemic making life harder on them are the parents who come to visitations (we provide a space for that at my school and I sometimes have to sit in the room with the kids due to these visits needing someone to keep an eye) Almost every parent who lost custody due to having lost a way to support their kids are the ones who show up. They ask questions, they make time. The ones who lost custody due to just not caring don't

[@audreym3908]

I feel bad for both kids and I feel bad for the former parents, the latter parents can go f off.

[@franceskitching5701]

I genuinely disagree with removing kids from families where inability to support is the issue. When you consider the costs that social workers incur, foster care, visitation support etc it's so much more expensive than to just support the family. It's whack to me that some countries see socialism as such an evil thing when actions like taking kids away due to financial hardship (especially when it is mostly involuntary, particularly during covid), is not only unnecessarily traumatic, but also false economy.

[@OZARKMOON1960]

#1 - So happy to hear that Sister OP is doing well - marriage, new baby. Sad about her kitty, though. And that Brother OP and his twin seem to be settling in and happy. The back and forth texts / comments are just too damn funny and so typical of well-adjusted siblings, which is exactly what he & bro deserve. As to parents, sounds like the two OPs at least don't have anything to do with them and that is best for all as they sounded awful. Sister OP's house must be full; she, hubby, their baby, her 3 niblings and 2 brothers. Sounds like a TV show 'eight is enough, for now'. lol

[@christophermills7693]

good to know the sister is overcoming the mess she got herself into..

[@zerobolt9506]

While I do agree & believe she got herself into it, you can't say the parents didn't have a hand in this at all, there awful people that deserves bad karma.

[@JupitersTears]

@@zerobolt9506 yes these guys built something beautiful from the garbage they were raised in glad to see it

[@LadyCeag840]

Story 2: NTA, and I wish I know what happened afterward! I bet the wedding couple finally caved and had to pay the full price!

[@WyntheRogue]

I'm glad the first post turned out to be so wholesome, these siblings coming together and having a healthy relationship after having to deal with a toxic dynamic for years from such crappy, heartless parents, seriously, why have kids if you don't even love them?! [This is why sex education and is important, especially with conservative control freaks policing women's bodies.] That said, I wish nothing but a happy future for OP, her siblings, hubby and kiddos this story has reaffirmed my beliefs that onion ninjas exist because who else is cutting onions in here?!

[@floraposteschild4184]

Big hug to this lovely family. I would hope that the sister, OP'S brothers, and soon the twins are sending money to help this family out. It's terribly unfair if OP and her fiance have all the work burden AND all the financial burden.

[@shebakoby]

ah, with the linkage, the picture becomes clearer. It's obvious the parents of the OPs are narcissists, and if anyone was the Golden Child it was likely the oldest sister - the drug-bender one.

[@tennesseedogpack]

Story two: make the invoice , wait 90 days then sell her debt off to a collection agency

[@Slipdreality]

I didn't realize these stories were connected but my goodness I needed the wholesomeness today.. Thank you and I hope your Sunday all!

[@aaroneisenman6873]

I kinda remember the original post. So glad everything seems to be working out. I can empathize with the older sister, parentification is a thing, which is likely why she went done the route she did. No excuse for what she did, but glad to see she as made amends. I would like to know her side of the story, though, just to get the full story. The parents can take a long walk off a short pier though. ETA: I've never been this early to a post so yeah me?

[@KE-hr4sb]

S1: I remember this one! Not ashamed to admit it made me tear up a bit. S2: Charge full price before delivery, and add a charge for each edit they made. The entitlement and audacity! Tell Cousin that you only give the family discount to close friends and family. (ETA Ha! I see other people are saying the same thing lol.) Then going forward, tell the family that just because you do this to be nice doesn't mean it doesn't cost you in materials, time, and pushing back actual paying clients, and if they can't be appreciative and instead threaten you(!), that the perks stop here and they can thank Cousin for the loss of privileges.

[@sequoyasierra5671]

THE LAST STORY This falls under the heading of "No good deed goes unpunished." OP was doing a good thing for someone in the family. OP went above and beyond for these people. It is a good thing the cousin was so into revisions that the goods weren't delivered before OP found out they weren't close enough to the cousin to be invited but close enough to be expected to put in all OP's time, labor, and materials. OP NTA As for the commenter in the video that said esh because OP let it go too far, OP was willing to do this for a family member not knowing OP wasn't considered a family member in return. How could OP have known he and his wife weren't going to be invited to the wedding?

[@cheyennetrumbos]

Suuuuper early. Love your stuff Mark Story 1: I remember this one. I feel so sorry for those kids. (But also very glad they have Op) Update 2: what the fuck is wrong with those parents? This family is too fucking cute

[@ivy4104]

Yo Mark! Realised it’s been a while that I last thanked you soooo… thanks for the content mah dude! Appreciate it.

[@MarkNarrations]

And thank you for continuing to stick with me :)

[@qnkendra1523]

Wild I've heard both of the first parts of these before I had no clue they were connected and so the OP who adopted her siblings kids is the original OG. What a wonderful human she managed to become especially given the family she was raised in.

[@queenwilco3723]

Love this group of stories and how things are progressing. To help with anyone who might have concerns or be afraid of this happening in their own situation 1. Once the authorities are involved in removing children from parents, the one who is given guardianship does not have legal right to hand over any kids or even allow any type of contact. 2. Parents have to go through the agency, jump through any and all hoops required and still not be given any custody and possibly not exec receive unsupervised visits. 3. After a yr of the parent/s being out of the picture their rights can be removed and they can be adopted. Once this happens the bio parent cannot have any part or say without the LEGAL, adoptive parents say and blessing. Now what is missing in this information is that even though Op adopted them, due to child services being involved, she still may not be able to allow the kids contact. In some states in the US, if anything happens to the child after allowing the bio parent contact (whether they are adopted or just under guardianship) then the ones legally responsible can actually have felony charges put against them. It's considered as knowingly putting a minor child in an abusive, neglectful, or endangering situation. Now, not all states have this and not all situations require this. So if op feels that this is what's best for the oldest kiddo I truly hope they all heal as a family

[@justaperson4656]

"My parents made it clear that we weren't supposed to exist. They weren't abusive or neglectful but they were cold through our whole childhood." Bud, that is abuse and neglect. I went to therapy BECAUSE my dad was cold and callous with me after medical issues, he also made it abundantly clear I was an accident, and one that made him "leave home" (his home country) and go somewhere new where he didn't like. I've been unpacking with my therapist for a long time. Both of my therapists have called abuse on it.

[@PawsandRec]

I love how you tell people about the time stamps like it doesn't mess with your play time lol

[@Undomaranel]

If you dropped/ spilled food as a child and you didn't get yelled at/ slapped/ time out by one parent and lectured on why you are worthless for wasting food/ money/ your dad's hard work/ the countless grocery and production workers whom you essentially spat on them for what they did for you, go give your parents a hug and an I love you from those of us who wish we could.

[@Frostfern94]

I wasn’t allowed to touch food but anyway my parents and my grandparents who raised me are dead. I’d hug my Nan if I could. None of the others, but I did love my Nan.

[@franciebelcher4594]

2nd story is so great! I can definitely empathize with how OP was raised. So happy OP and twin were given the opportunity to live their best lives. Way to go big Sis!

[@oakenshadow6763]

I want a movie! A TV show! This is so beautiful. That family is so great. I'm so glad the twins finaly have a healthy family to be with.

[@zerobolt9506]

I'm really happy that the sister is getting help now, just shows you that sometimes, just sometimes people CAN change for the better, this restores my faith in humanity, well just a little.

[@Weirdo365yea]

Story One. Hearing about the bio-mom, OP, and the brothersparents made me understand a little more why biomom was the way she was. I'm glad everyone is getting helping and it seems that their horrible parents are out of everyones lives and OP and her husband is doing good.she'

[@thomasbarca9297]

Story 2: it’s not worth time and effort they put in for an ungrateful cousin

[@shebakoby]

"I don't know how [my sister] changed so fast" OP, either your sister became a narcissist/cluster-B disaster in adulthood which may have made her more susceptible to addiction, or the drugs damaged her brain making her into a de facto Narcissist with no empathy, no self-awareness, and selfishness above all else. Drugs are bad, m'kay kids.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

M’kay

[@Mimikinn]

Yeah, drugs destroy the part of your brain that creates empathy and makes people very selfish. So it’s no shock that the sister who raised her and the woman she is now are so vastly different. It is sad though cuz it sounds like if she never got on drugs than she may have been a good mom.

[@shebakoby]

@@Mimikinn It probably doesn't help that the older sis was also a Golden Child of Narcissistic parents. Empathy can be conditioned away from Golden Children. If they're not true narcs themselves, they can recover from this.

[@MIchick1989]

My heart really goes out to that older sister. I can't imagine the level of parentification she faced if that was how the parents treat the babies. It obviously doesn't excuse leaving her kids, but I can see the level of pain she was avoiding.

[@MrBiggeryu]

I heard the stories separately but altogether it great ending and I’m glad that the family is able to start to heal together.

[@AGloom6159]

THE STORY ONE GROUP IS SO DAMN WHOLESOME I LUB IT 💕💕💕

[@moonyollie6977]

The first OP and her fiancé sound like wonderful people and wonderful parents. Second OP/Brother sound like a delight too lol Edit: I'm glad the eldest sister is getting the help she needed. Story 2: Lol NTA. They can all go pound sand. Also they do not get the family discount, fuck that.

[@roowyrm9576]

A wonderful story Mark, I'd heard some of it before, but was happy to hear the full saga. Such a heart tearing story, and such a great ending.

[@averageviewer4256]

... Why they gotta cut so many onions Through out that reddit saga...

[@simac8396]

If you legally adopted a child you can't just give them back to an unfit parent. Ops family sounds disgusting

[@rebecculousrk]

This has been one of my favorite “wholesome threads”. I have a favorite spicy one (flaming revenge party on cheater) a favorite justnoMIL (the series of escalating posts where the MIL attempts to get rights, and gets kicked out of the family instead, or possible the kidnapping MIL) but this is one of the best wholesome ones. Up there with the older brother who wasn’t really Missing! (That was lovely) . Thanks for soooooo many great stories.

[@LadyJuse]

Update 4 is peak sibling energy.

[@dm9078]

Where are the courts and social services in this? I can’t see even the most loony “Children belong with their mother judge” would agree to this convict even seeing the children unsupervised let alone having custody of the kids. WTF a zoom call without the therapist present? Did she discuss this with the therapist. For fvck’s sake. This is nuts!

[@thebirdchannelforfans623]

I think the therapist said it should be up to the kids to meet the egg donor, so obviously a therapist was consulted. Thank goodness it was a zoom call and not an in person meet, she may have tried to take the kids. The OP did thankfully say they legally adopted the kids and has custody. I’m surprised it wasn’t also supervised by a therapist

[@megannason3649]

I hate when people say a kid doesn’t know what they want, of course he knows!

[@frith.calluna]

It makes me so incredibly sad when people have been subjected to abuse and neglect so long, that they don't even recognize it as such. I'm so incredibly glad OP2 and the twin were able to move in with their sister and live a better, happier life.

[@sweettea9220]

I've heard all of these before, had no idea they were connected. Wtf. I feel so sorry for that family

[@Mimikinn]

So OP’s name seems to be Kalani, which is a Hawaiian gender neutral name, and a very popular one. But more importantly it translates into English as ‘the heavens’ so people with the name are heavenly, or very kind and benevolent. A very fitting name for OP. 🌺

[@wplains]

Wonderful family story. So different from all those selfish “child free” people who crow about never having kids. There’s nothing more fulfilling than raising children with love and attention.

[@Sirens.Lullaby]

Op baguette is an amazing parent, I hope she has many good memories to come

[@truthseeker9249]

Story 1: I have heard both of these separate stories before and had no idea they were actually connected. Who left this bowl of onions here?

[@o0BlackSand0o]

The OP (sister) is amazing. She took in 5 kids and is giving them so much love that they wouldn't have had otherwise

[@arandomfan4710]

If your kid has to be FORCED to see the other parent. Then it's probably best not to have them see that person. It really says a lot that on two levels.

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

Oh wow! I had NO IDEA that these stories were all linked! I am not kidding. I heard the 1st one that I remember. I really do fully remember this Update 2 as I specifically remember the OP and his twin. I just had no idea they were all from the same family.

[@kilva1]

Whwn a post gives you so much feels. I'm so glad the sister could help all those kids and I am so happy things are going good for ger

[@owl6637]

I wish I had a big sibling like the sister in the first post. Would've saved me a lot of trauma, having Autism myself. That sister is a Saint and she deserves everything good in life

[@bloonh8tr619]

I've heard these two stories before but I've never realized that they were connected! Small world

[@MrsJones19]

Thanks for the stories today Mark! Allergies have hit me super hard and I’ve lost my voice but I’d rather listen to you anyway! lol

[@astronautviolet153]

story 1 NTA She adopt them they're her children now and more of a mother to her twin brothers, and it's nice to hear the big older sister in rehab and going to college.

[@wickeddanish5814]

think i been listning to stori 1 30 times now ... just the way you read it mark always makes me smile Mark ...

[@SenseiRaisen]

I was the entire time like: "WAIT!!! sister has to go through court for do that. She is no way shape or form she can get the kids without the proper check ups" OP doesn't had anything to do with her losing custody or seen as a shitty parents either. Edit: WELP! as wholesome as it was, it still doesn't address one elephant in the room. THEIR PARENTS. I'm glad OP's sister got to take the L and admit wrong as it seems the entire thing shake her up entirely and make probably realize she was heading to the same path of her parents, since she probably normalize that behaviour from so long.

[@carlrood4457]

It sounds like the older sister still wasn't clean when she was released and had unrealistic expectations. Hopefully, now she's getting help, she accepts the aunt role. It won't every be easy.

[@tammiesites20]

They weren't told till after they were done that they weren't invited so the cost is on the people who are getting married.

[@catsinmycradle6315]

I am literally starting my day listening to your videos while starting my day getting dressed, making breakfast, washing my face, and putting on some make up. I’m dressing a little nicer today because I have a job interview wish me luck!

[@mariocosby8013]

Story1- so confused & so many questions

[@simonesanaa5331]

Awe no Aristotle. But op is such a wonderful mother/motherly figure / sister. I love this so much.

[@audreym3908]

Heard both first stories so many times that I don't care, it's so wholesome and sweet.

[@Hulahoopish]

“We fed and clothed you, so you owe us” Dude. That is legally the bare fucking minimum. If you didn’t do those things you would be charged with neglect you don’t deserve a medal for that.

[@indyfmw]

This is so sweet! I hope the family is doing well!

[@OhHeyItIsNano]

I am honestly surprised to recognize the first 3 stories. Wild.

[@mrbadguysan]

Regarding the eldest parents; it isn’t raised by narcissists, it’s raised by monsters.

[@onurkneezb]

3:25 this hit extremely close to home for me, only I came to this mindset when I was 19... poor kid, I don't need to watch the rest, he has aged well beyond his actual age, and wish him the best...

[@clairebear-96]

Just want to say i’m watching this after getting home from a My Chemical Romance concert - i’ve been wanting to see them for over 10 years and finally got to! I cried the whole time, it was fantastic!!!! Hope everyone has had a good weekend and much love y’all 💛

[@dianabialaskahansen2972]

Story 1: OP is a saint and.the more we heard of it, the more I knew it to be the truth. Glad that OPs sister did get out of the addiction and seem to have settled with being an aunt in the children's lives. And that the twin brothers have a good and stable home.

[@christywillis1707]

Mark, thanks for making such lovely, wholesale videos for us every day! You put in a lot of work to make something really wonderful! I am always doing different things when I listen, so I forget to comment later - but like, cooking, cleaning, working, relaxing etc. I always know I can rely on your videos to be calming, interesting and you always include interesting personal anecdotes that make me appreciate your perspective on the story, even if I disagree with you. ❤️🥰🙏

[@hendyo_98]

Why weren’t social workers and lawyers involved the second the sister got out prison? Surely sister would have been told not to try and get in contact with OP.

[@flamelily2086]

Story 1 OP has adopted her sister's children legally. Her sister is no longer their mother. Instead of berating OP she should be grateful to her for caring for the children Instead of allowing them to go into foster care.

[@jerrystauffer2351]

The last story about the wedding supplies. It's well known among those who craft or have their own business that people do not understand homemade or made by a friend doesn't equal free. It's hard to tell where OP's generosity ends and the couple's entitlement begins. Clearly these choosing beggars didn't seem to grasp what they were asking. I do a small amount of quilting and random acquaintances will just expect a free quilt that would take hundreds of hours labor and hundreds more in materials. There's no shame and many women feel guilted into dozens of baby quilts a year for complete strangers. It's easy to be generous with someone else's time and effort.

[@vernell2601]

Hope the Waffle Gang is having a great weekend 😊

[@chaseashley6775]

My mom and I went to brunch today and I got waffles with strawberries 😊

[@wmdkitty]

NTA. Oldest has straight up _said_ "No", younger ones don't remember her, and OP is doing exactly what she should by letting the kids choose. Sister and Family all suck, though.

[@chazk4110]

What is wrong with the family? Take kids to prison to meet mother? Nope!!!!

[@kountzanthony7021]

S1 Great story gives me hope that the world is not as bad as we would like to believe it is. there are still some great people in this world and she is one of them.

[@lenardjones4666]

love this first story! GOD bless this family.

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

Hey you yes you remember to take care of yourself gosh darn it, you are always valid, and I love you and care about you so please take care of yourself 💜💜🤗🤗💜💜🤗🤗

[@susanlosey9511]

OP and the rest of her siblings have probably gone no contact with them.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

Last story reminds me of the kid who made his aunts wedding dress and didn’t get invited.

[@masterq134]

I hate weddings. This is a prime example of why

[@paulchaudoir190]

OP: Husband and oldest are putting up a tire swing. Me: Oh yeah. It's all coming together.