Sister-In-Law Made Me Question My Husband's Loyalty As Her Friend Likes Him r/Relationships

[@TheArnaa]

STORY 2: Wife “I can’t go to therapy because I’m afraid the therapist will attack me.” Translation: I know the therapist will call me out on my behaviour.

[@susankaempfer8427]

Wow. What is wrong with her?

[@BodyLanguageAnalysisInterrogat]

Sounds like projection from a narricist or borderline or antisocial wife ; (

[@Cl0ckcl0ck]

@@susankaempfer8427 What's wrong with OP? How can you continue to live with a monster like that? I'm sure he's a sociopath too because he's only crying about his dear dear money.

[@nataliereeves3594]

She's saying the therapist will be against her because she knows that they will point out what she did was wrong, and her ego can't cope with that. She's a narsasist with an ego and jealousy problem. She can't stand others being better than her or being preferred to her and will do whatever it takes to bring them down. She needs to be put in an asylum for the good of everyone around her before she escalates ever further and goes violent.

[@Goldie22]

​@@Cl0ckcl0ckop is not coping and money is the easiest thing for him to focus on tbf to him

[@zachf748]

Got two psychopaths in these stories. The levels they both went to, to try and ruin an innocent persons life is insane.

[@robertbishop5158]

More than 2 people

[@mayurakshimukherjee7948]

Three

[@Fete_Fatale]

@@mayurakshimukherjee7948 Four

[@mayurakshimukherjee7948]

@@Fete_Fatale who is the 4th one?

[@Fete_Fatale]

@@mayurakshimukherjee7948 I was just counting the couples in the first story, OP and her husband, the husband's colleague (that he was falsely accused of having an affair with), and her husband. It was later that I realised the comment was about both stories - the 2nd story had more victims, Laura & her husband, and OP himself ... although he was only a financial victim since he decided to stay with crazy while she nearly bankrupted him in the court case. If 2nd OP had any sense he'd've dropped her the moment it became clear that she was going to take him down.

[@jodieg6318]

Story 1: I truly hope OP and her husband can both see that they were both victims of a pair heinous people and it’s sole the fault of Lisa and Emma who destroyed 4 lives out of ego, envy and whatever goes though a pair of sadistic minds like that.

[@kimberlyWard8152]

Right like why are people blaming op

[@x1tekja]

​@@kimberlyWard8152 well they blame her for not trusting her husband and being transparent when he asked for the source. Had she communicated with her husband instead of believing all that, she may have had a fighting chance. She could even have her husband on her side. Reference story 2. Both scenarios are about a vindictive woman spreading lies to manipulate others lives. The outcomes were diametrically opposite because of how they trusted and communicated with their husband. To clarify in the second story I am not referencing the op but the couple who his wife tried to destroy.

[@DragonflyandTheWolf]

@@kimberlyWard8152 There is another post out there similar to this one but its from the perspective of a person who was the one framed for cheating. Her MIL did the framing because she didn't like her. Her husband divorced her and the OP was ostracized by her whole family including her daughter. Other than the daughter, when the truth came to light, OP had no forgiveness for anyone who believed her MIL's frame job. Yes, the OP is in a sympathetic situation because she was tricked, but she still hurt her husband, and that hurt wont go away because she found information that cleared his name.

[@335chr]

​@@kimberlyWard8152because op made huge errors and almost destroyed two marriages

[@AndyyWithAY]

Story 2 OP has the rose colored glasses on heavy. He's blinded by love. She's absolutely a psycho!

[@johnketz9656]

she is a viper loser. OP should run as far as he can. His wife will try to destroy him to !

[@rogiroja]

I'd be terrified to do/say anything to piss her off. And God help the ex-friend that she would 100% blame if he divorced her.

[@kimsvisualdiary]

She’s a straight up sociopath. She has a completely different reality made up in her head where SHE is the victim. She absolutely would make his life a living hell if he left her.

[@Davimez]

@@rogiroja yeah I remember this story and all I can think is good luck dude your gonna need it. I know reddit reply is mostly divorce and run. But she's a psycho and will do something dangerous to op if he ever does

[@Original_Tenshi_Chan]

@@Davimez Agreed, but at this point, I kind of feel like OP deserves all of the rage she is going to direct at him, he deserves the ruined life she will drop at his feet. He sees what she did to someone who didn't do anything wrong. The psycho "tested" the friendship, punished the friend for trusting her, held onto that misguided hatred for A FUCKING DECADE. Tried to ruin that woman's life, as well as her child's and husband's lives. She spent a year tormenting this innocent woman. She doesn't regret what she did, only that she has to stop. I don't even feel like she cares that she is putting her husband in debt to satisfy her bloodlust. She is actively avoiding therapy, probably because she knows it will out her true nature, and right now she can still hide behind the "I was just truly only trying to spare the poor victims in her life!" lie. I had commented on the original post that even if he doesn't want to divorce her and he feels she is his soul mate, that perhaps a legal divorce but not emotional one may be something to look into. That maybe they can have a divorce lawyer argue that she should accept all of the lawsuit debt in the divorce settlement, and then she can file for bankruptcy to discharge the debt, or at the least, the debt will no longer be tied to his name, but they could continue to live together as a "married couple". But at the least, explore his legal options to protect himself and not lose all his money. Plus, when she inevitably does this again, he will be sheltered from the fall out. I was met with his anger and "You obviously don't understand how marriage works!" narratives. You know, if "tying yourself to the heaviest rock that is desperate to meet the bottom of the ocean and take everyone down with it" is "how marriage works", then no. No I don't want to "understand that". My perception of marriage is 2 people, working as partners to enrich each other and those around them. But, he likes this sinking ship, so perhaps it's best he goes down with it, and spares a new potential victim from hitching his wagon to her.

[@moon7shinev150]

If Emma was willing to lie about an affair I wonder if her ex husband was actually abusive or if that is another lie

[@philwill0123]

2 things can be simultaneously true. Emma might have come out of a abusive relationship and OPs husband was the "perfect man", until OP nabbed him.

[@christophera4527]

Probably a lie as well to make herself feel better for cheating or doing something worse to him. Once you discover a lie stop believing them altogether.

[@sweetambitions2381]

@@philwill0123 Possible but this does not at all sound like a woman who can be abused easily. She’s not meek, indecisive, or any characteristic common in abuse victims. If anything she’s the one with the character of an abuser.

[@KittenLove536]

@@sweetambitions2381 Time out, so you're saying DA victims can only be meek, indicisive, "etc"? Or that those characteristics make someone more likely to be abused? dude this is dangerously close to victim blaming and your comment is inherently incorect to begin with. Frankly i agree it's possible both can be true, and also recognize we cant and shouldnt know the full story because it's the friend of an ex of a reditor. All that matters in that regard is she was in a relationship that ended poorly. Do better.

[@davidnash8208]

@@KittenLove536 it is true that anyone can be dv victim but someone who is strong with other people and is a known liar must be viewed with suspicion.

[@jadedflames2809]

first story: Lisa and Emma are vicious monsters who relied on OP's silence to make everything work but in the end, disgusting to be honest and I'm glad their lives are turned upside down

[@TheSeptemberSapphire]

Story 2: With the amount of effort she put into stalking Laura, she could have gotten a full time job so she could pay for her lawsuit.

[@TheTrueKarin]

So true.

[@ladyv5655]

Not only that, but the OP needs to understand that if he crosses her, she will turn on him like this, too. If I were him, I would just disappear one day and leave my lawyer to contact her about the divorce. And he should consider changing his name and moving far away and disappearing from social media.

[@MrBuns-yi2hk]

Yeah hoe can you trust someone who would do something so vile to a person they considered a friend? She will definitely do the same to her eventually.

[@stoogie375]

That's what I'm saying!~

[@ineedhoez]

😂😂😂😂

[@viridityone3106]

Story 2: if you refuse to see the tidal wave of red flags your wife leaves in her wake then the only thing I can say is thank God there are no children involved. I would genuinely fear for whatever children you had with this woman.

[@grievernoctis2238]

Honestly with that behavior being taught to them, be ready to fear the (hypothetical) children themselves, not for them. Thank God they didn't creat demonspawns

[@ashh4929]

Right? How is he so bloody calm and just WHY and how in the holy name of the Fonz would you stick around with this crazy cow?! If the universe holds ANY justice or sense of fairness, they will NEVER have kids. God both of these stories are 7 kinds of crazy on a steaming cuckoo platter.

[@susankaempfer8427]

I really get the impression she doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong.

[@nataliereeves3594]

I think op is scared she will do this to him if he divorced her.

[@yellowishgreendragon.-.]

I feel so bad for the co worker who was dragged into it, and got their relationship ruined because of it. They didn't even do anything.

[@chantalalexander]

Not just her marriage, she had to leave her job and relocate to a different city. Filing a restraining order is the nicest thing her (the coworker) and her husband did, because with a decent amount of evidence, she could have done much worse.

[@DrWho1596]

@@chantalalexander she SHOULD have done worse these were blasphemous allegations. They used her without her consent no less to ruin a marriage and her own marriage was ruined because of it. Shoulda made them pay big BIG fines

[@vampire9545]

Neither did op

[@335chr]

​@@vampire9545wrong Op did everything wrong

[@emnorfolk5559]

The wife "seems indifferent to therapy" because she STILL believes everything is Laura's fault!!

[@BodyLanguageAnalysisInterrogat]

Sounds like projection from a narricist or borderline or antisocial wife ; (

[@WabbitHunter68]

@@BodyLanguageAnalysisInterrogat First thing I thought was that she was a narcissist. They hold a grudge like nothing else and can't see that they're ever wrong. If that's the case I can see the OP's future filled with the same kind of crap.

[@terramarini6880]

She has way too much time on her hands. Off to a full time job, you will pay back the settlement and then we'll consider if were staying together... and get thee to a therapist or I'm done with you.

[@jackchop1576]

I'm wondering if Emma's "abusive relationship" was reactive abuse being redirected back at her. She seems like the shadiest one here.

[@gaywerewolf1294]

Fr

[@ItsYaBoiV]

Not gonna lie, if someone came at me with all that evidence, I'd very likely do what OP did and nuke the whole marriage. You really gotta be skeptical about everything, it's so easy to fake messages and photos.

[@geckokid8265]

I agree and I like your profile picture

[@ItsYaBoiV]

@@geckokid8265 thank you, it's my favorite Van Gogh painting 😆

[@joimumu]

Agree had Op done any investigation of her own she would have found her husband was innocent but she couldn’t be bothered and she protected the one that destroyed her and her husband life as well as the other marriage

[@ineedhoez]

True. At this point, if you get a photo of something, you gotta take it for analysis

[@BruinPhD2009]

​@@ItsYaBoiVI knew Van Gogh was ahead of his time, but WOW! 😂

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

I know OP should've known better than just believe rumors (and it's always important to give your spouse a chance to defend themselves if accusations of cheating are leveled at you), but Emma is sick for trying to ruin her brother's marriage just because she wanted someone else as her brother's wife. I don't know about you guys but This Definitely warrants NO CONTACT EVER! Even going towards you are officially dead to me territory.

[@ScarlettaAgni]

but it wasn't just rumors, she was shown "proof". it was faked but the point was she was shown some substance to back up the hearsay

[@jackspring7709]

OP doesn't get any of my sympathy whatsoever: she nuked someone else's marriage as well as her own and didn't allow her husband to explain himself or convince her that she was mistaken.

[@jackspring7709]

@@ScarlettaAgni "proof". Photoshopped pictures. By the looks of things she didn't even give her husband a chance to prove to her (real proof, not pictures) that this was impossible. At any rate it doesn't matter- she's nuked her marriage, and another innocent person's marriage and now she has all the time in the world to think about it.

[@ScarlettaAgni]

Exactly why I put it in quotation marks. It was deliberately made to trick her, and when being cheated on with another married person, it is indeed best to tell them, because why in the world would you let them continue going through what you did? She's ALREADY been cheated on, she's been through this before.

[@APlatapus]

@@jackspring7709 This is by far the dumbest take you could've had. If she was shown proof. Most likely extremely well made photo-shops. Why would she need the husbands side? If this was a story of a girl being cheated on and she blew up the home wreckers marriage. You would've been praising her. But because she got manipulated and did what every sane person would've done in her situation. You shit on her. You're pathetic

[@angelajaime5155]

"It helped my wife, that she has family in law enforcement" Ah, nice to see nepotism protecting dangerous and crazy people again.

[@owl7072]

Story 1: I can't bring myself to be mad at Op. She was cheated on before and his sister is so god damn sick and twisted that she used Op's insecurities and shit against her and even went as far as to make "proof" to show her. Should Op have known better? Perhaps, but unless I missed it (am making dinner and not fully paying attention) she never had a reason to believe his sister would lie, especially just to wreck their relationship.

[@ynmonroe]

I think the one thing OP should have done was expose the person that told her. All of this could have been avoided with that one action. But alas, we live and learn, if we're lucky. Hopefully the husband reconsiders.

[@zerobolt9506]

Same

[@HeoBaby24]

I can just because she got cheated on before doesn't mean jack shit. She instead of dealing with her issues. Let her insecurity to ruin a relationship. If she never seen since of cheating she had no reason to believe her. Like I get she made fake screenshot and what now. But did she ever thought and question anything?

[@bribri2925]

Yeah, the SIL is crazy scary, did you hear how she said, “ I can ruin your life so fast“? And the other girl was smirking? That was some high school crap right there. And Op was kind of silly for letting them in the first place. Should’ve just called her husband when she saw them there and/or recorded them (they could’ve claimed that she tried to hurt them or some thing). I find it funny now that they are both at each other’s throats

[@justlooking1299]

I can’t blame her either . Allot of people will however they had proof it wasn’t like op just decided “ I’m not trusting him because she said it . “‘They went as far as to fake screenshots , messages and all that like what did we expect from op ? Like seriously

[@HackiePuffs]

Wow I can’t really blame OP for falling for their sister’s lies but at the same time I feel like the ex and the other colleague have every right to be hurt by how they responded. It was just one day that they were accused of something they didn’t do by their partners and it was all over. I would definitely try to reach out and apologize but I honestly don’t think this situation could be fixed.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

She wasn’t the one responsible. But she fell for the trap. And that caused 2 couples to break up. So they can be upset for the part she played.

[@ianmoritzplatapino3684]

I blame her for not hearing her stbxh. they could've gone and confront the sister. but she choose to not hear him.

[@SidereusOfTheFallen]

Incredible how people are always saying "don't confront cheater, they just lie" "never believe a cheater" "Why would the other person lie" and in this case everyone's ready to jump at OP for doing exactly that...

[@FluffballKitties]

I haven't got to the end, but she did apologize to the supposed ap's husband. He blew up at her for it, which is understandable. Edit: I'm glad the husband forgave his wife after the accusations from op, and Emma and Laura are on the fritz.

[@jackspring7709]

True.

[@paulastiles5507]

Story #2: I remember this story from a while back. There is something seriously wrong with OP's wife. She's bonkers. I get that OP's in a bit of denial about marrying crazy, but he definitely married crazy. He'd be wise to get out now and as far away as he can, since she's confirmed she can be off-the-scale vindictive about things that not only are minor, but that she's totally made up in her head. Plus, she does "loyalty tests." It almost doesn't stand out in the huge parade of other red flags, but normally, it would be a big one.

[@ronhall5395]

She is nuts. She needs serious professional help. He better cover his ass on everything. If they break up she will attempt to destroy his life.

[@sharonwolfe5210]

NObody WANTS to be called out on their bs--- HOWEVER--- NO therapy , no marriage. She's frightened about SOMEthing , and her reluctance to ferret out whatever that thing is is disturbing. NOW , she's manipulating YOU. You're very noble about wanting to help her no matter what , but if she's not willing to help HERSELF , I'd consider that a HUGE red flag. Dude--- this is your LIFE , your Future , and what's gonna happen years down the line she remembers someone else that pissed her off and the cycle begins again ? I really do understand you are between a rock and a hard place , but understand she went through extensive and malicious lengths to try to absolutely DESTROY Laura's Life. In ANY light , I'm sorry, but all I can see is more manipulation directed toward you , and a possible escalation of her behavior . If it were me , I'd definitely take a bit of time out on this relationship , because as much as it may break YOUR heart , there's a possibility it may even save your LIFE !!! Best of luck to you and your future.

[@robertbishop5158]

She needs to go to jail people need to Stop ASAP in enabling this behavior

[@rutyqutykandi1361]

I'm glad someone else pointed out the loyalty test. I feel so bad for OP because he doesn't realize that's a look into how crazy she is.

[@robertx8020]

OP got mad that ppl on Reddit called his wife crazy and a psycho....well I have news for you! Btw when OP stays with this woman than he better give up on saving as it will all go to waste after the next lawsuit! Hell, even w/o OP knowing she might be at it as we speak!

[@thecrebain6760]

Story 2: I feel worried that OP is going to waste all his time, money and love on a woman that will turn on him like she did with this friend of hers.. and that will be ugly.

[@jaymel4691]

Yeah, I think he needs to leave her for his own sake. He keeps wanting her to come to her senses and see reason, etc but she seemed extremely irrational and obsessed. Without a lot of intensive professional help she will never change, and she will never be rational/logical about this because it is a mental illness. It needs treatment, she will not "get better" on her own. That is not OP's job to "fix" her though. I would make her getting serious and ongoing treatment a requirement or else I would immediately file for divorce. She can do this again, or even continue going after poor Laura, and she could get even worse consequences.

[@Nylak-Otter]

Yep. A person like that is often looking out for only themselves, and lacks true empathy with others. Anyone can become the enemy, and she seems to have a scorched earth policy on how to deal with enemies. No, thank you.

[@BaeBunni]

guy talks about how weird incels are, but like the guy is like literally a bootlicking simp.

[@Cl0ckcl0ck]

He would deserve it. Some community service for this kind of torture? Pffff.

[@nataliereeves3594]

If he's not careful, she may kill him in his sleep for whatever imagend slite she thinks up next.

[@katiecakesl4691]

Story 2: OP needs to leave his wife. Staying by someone who does something so vile and psychotic just shows you approve of it. When people show you who they are, believe them.

[@DisneyChar]

He's just as crazy as her, only upset he lost money.

[@damien678]

I don't think it means you approve of it, especially if you're active in changing your partner for the better. If my partner did this I wouldn't leave him, but that's my choice. I do think it should be a consideration for OP, though.

[@sharonwolfe5210]

Damn straight ! 'Specially straight up off their damn rocker like this broad. She positively REEKS of Amber Heard's capabilities...

[@Rose-yt5hi]

@@damien678 The fact she’s so against therapy and doesn’t feel bad for what she did, just for what it cost her and her husband, is a huge red flag she hasn’t learned her lesson and will do this again if she gets triggered.

[@anthonygilmour6236]

@@DisneyChar or also a victim of her @buse but is not aware of it...yet. Sadly most men are told you are supposed to stay in relationships even is they are so toxic you should wear a Hazmat suit.

[@madisonl3401]

Jesus Christ what the hell is wrong with the stalker wife? How unhinged do you have to be to put that many hours and energy into doing that elaborate plan?

[@kanelovec4315]

Story 2. Divorce this two faced witch. She pretty much had a double life where she had a goal of destroying multiple people who were on her "hit list". I would always have the fear one day I accidentally make a simple mistake she decide to finally do something like this. She has obsessive, stalking, and more behaviors. She hated the other girl because she was living a "better" life than her.

[@AngelaVEdwards]

And had lost weight and was thinner. What happened to approaching her and telling her how fantastic she looks and mention that she's proud of how well she's done? Why continue an enemy situation when you don't have to? While they may never have been friends again, they could have been acquaintances who like each other.

[@TheTrueKarin]

I honestly suspect, that the moment the woman saw her ex friend there was a shifting in power. The woman was probably in a midlife crises ( a job with to low income, oversize, and probably other things that make her angry) but till the point she saw her friend in the cafe again there was the little mood booster in her head, that she still was better. She was still more attractive than her ex friend. Her friend was still beneath her. Well the real world shattered that in brutally and she went nuts over it.😅

[@pequenaesposa3286]

It's ok, you can say bitch on KZbin lol

[@theofficerfactory2625]

Story 1: The fact that Lisa was willing to ruin a strangers family just so her brother and her best friend could get together is just so wrong. Also that Emma was willing to let go along with this is so bad. Story 1 update: Wow. This was bad and wow; what an ending. The house of cards collapsed quite splendidly. Story 2: Uh, wow. Story 2 update: What the heck. She is quite delusional; the wife. Poor Laura.

[@titismith4955]

2nd story: Someone needs to knock some sense into OP and tell him point blank “You married crazy, and crazy will become you”

[@RylieRiddle]

S2: divorce during her trial would have been the best option for OP because during that trial she would be on thin ice with the legal system. She led a campaign against a former friend for no reason other than jealousy over a guy she encouraged this friend to see. The wife needs at the very least therapy for herself to figure out if something is wrong with her that is treatable. And OP needs to now plan a divorce in secret, I would say before she can afford any decent lawyer.

[@VesnaVK]

Story 2: there's something wrong with OP. He thinks the problem is how to build back their savings after wife got sued. He legit thinks "why did wife get sued" is a secondary tale that he added as an afterthought for the curious. I remember this story. Same thing happened -- most people missed this weird, weird thing about OP's post.

[@trout512]

OP from story 2 is a total doormat. It's obvious his wife is unstable, a horrible person, and is clearly taking advantage of the guy. I kept thinking "Oh my goodness, he's not gonna leave her?" What a pathetic creature "love" has made of him.

[@SCOOBYGD]

He’ll just call you a incel for saying this.

[@trout512]

@@SCOOBYGD Not an incel, just asexual, aromantic, and autistic. I don't need all that romantic love stuff to feel fulfilled. I just need a small, close knit group of friends and family. So when someone like this pops up on my radar, it genuinely confuses and frustrates me. Like? If she really loved you, she wouldn't treat you like that. So the only logical conclusion you can draw from that is that she doesn't love you, or doesn't love you enough to get treatment and fix the behavior. And why would you want to love someone who doesn't love you back? I've had a couple of platonic and family relationships that I cut off immediately without a shred of remorse. The things they did were unacceptable, dangerous, and harmful to me. I've also had relationships where I've begun to withdraw contact, and when I told them the reasons why, they got medical treatment. Therapy, medication, and they now respect my boundaries. Maybe it's just confirmation bias on reddit and my personal life, but, I don't really see that in other people. And that just doesn't make sense to me.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Like damn! They photoshopped the husband with someone else to torpedo OP's relationship.

[@kolonarulez5222]

Imagine being scared for life during what's supposed to be such a happy time and the person only gets community service but like *a lot*

[@nonamenoface3654]

And the stalker's family is law enforcement

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

Story 1: What type of psycho stages things to make their own sibling look like a cheater to make their partner leave them? The sister caused 2 loving couples to break up. Story 2: I remember this story. You always here these stories from the perspective of those slighted, not the partner of the one who did the wrong thing. Stalking people like this is so wrong on so many levels. I don’t understand how someone could stay with someone who’s this morally messed up. The wife honestly sounds like she had some unchecked mental illness because that’s one of the few things that would set her off so suddenly like this. She’s completely paranoid too.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

I know OP should've known better than just believe rumors (and it's always important to give your spouse a chance to defend themselves if accusations of cheating are leveled at you), but Emma is sick for trying to ruin her brother's marriage just because she wanted someone else as her brother's wife. I don't know about you guys but This Definitely warrants NO CONTACT EVER! Even going towards you are officially dead to me territory.

[@TheNormExperience]

@@PrincessQ-fj9ly I mean that’s easy to say from the outside, but honestly I don’t know what I would have done in OP’s spot. I would like to think I would have the presence of mind to make them forward the “proof” to my phone to at least show him it to respond to, because that should be comparable to his phone…but in the moment I don’t know if I’d keep a level head. It definitely wouldn’t occur to me someone I absolutely trusted and considered family had dreamed this all up, faked an entire history of a fake work affair, with actual doctored photos and texts of them to prove it. Like…who is so disconnected from reality they make it their mission to end, not just your brother’s happy marriage, but also a complete stranger’s because you decided to involve them in your adolescent fantasy of “but my bestie and my brother could be married!” That’s just psychotic.

[@SidereusOfTheFallen]

@@PrincessQ-fj9ly While I don't disagree on a general level, most advice is "don't confront cheaters" "don't believe cheaters" and "Why would the other person lie?" This is literally the bible of reddit advice and a lot of what I also see being said about it on this channel. OP did exactly that, why is she in the wrong?

[@bribri2925]

Can u sue for stuff like this? There was clear damages to relationships. Sue for alienation of affection or some thing?

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

@@bribri2925 probably maybe. I don’t know exactly where they are. Or exactly what the evidence they have against them is. So I honestly couldn’t tell you

[@GrayTimber]

Story one: I don't blame OP. I mean, her husband's sister says he's cheating. With the strong feelings that come with that, she acted irrationally and swiftly. It caused damage, sure. But the sister and Emma are the root of the blame. I don't think OP is a bad person for reacting swiftly. I hope she learns to be a bit more skeptical from this, however

[@boooo13]

Well there was photoshopped pics and such, it wasn't just saying sister saying 'he's cheating' but instead saying 'he's cheating' with proof of it.

[@ronhall5395]

She had no reason to go to coworkers husband with out much more solid proof. Confronting her husband is ok, but she should have come clean on where the info came from before it ended up as a divorce. Sometimes you need to trust your spouse.

[@AndreNDP]

So, OP believes the sister, but not her actual husband? She doesn't try to go through his phone or computer or anything? That's just evidence of a person who doesn't trust their partner. I hope the husband doesn't get back with her.

[@keplersdream901]

@@AndreNDP And the husband knew that the sister was psycho. OP needs to move on from the entire family.

[@AndreNDP]

@@keplersdream901 Not necessarily. The way he immediately cut her out after OP told him tells me that, at the very least, she'd never tried to manipulate him before.

[@aikikaname6508]

Story 1: this is a case of everyone is a general after the war. Sure, we can say OP could have trusted the husband, but if we saw another post where OP got presented with photos and physical evidence of their husbands affair by their husbands own sibling and she ‘trusted her husband’, we would all be calling her a fool and delusional.

[@draconisdragonheart4248]

There was no physical evidence. Sadly, OP could have just checked the phone records to know this was all fake.

[@335chr]

I don't even care about trusting the husband she didn't even collect her own evidence

[@99stranger99]

Second story : Op's wife is unhinged, scary story !

[@SilverstreamPJ28]

Story 2: it's his fault for not running for the fucking hills after everything his wife told him. She's literally insane.

[@Russman67]

Story 2: The wife has screwed over OP immeasurably because her ex-friend had a glow up and she was jealous. I know he wants to see this in the best light possible but I can't see how this works since it doesn't seem like she can let that go. Honestly it might be better to risk her attacking him as the ex-husband than to keep her as a walking liability in his life.

[@xelectrix]

He'll have the upper hand as the wife now has court documented history of lying and stalking.

[@tinak2576]

Story 2: OP hears the pathetic excuses his wife made for her jealous vindictive quest and accepts them. Sad.

[@brandi5126]

S1: I don't think op should be so hard on herself because honestly I doubt her husband would have believed her if the situation was reversed. Especially with fabricated evidence. Show him the proof that they lied, apologize and then go to therapy and try to move on. This is just evil that they did this. They destroyed two families over lies.

[@You_said_what1]

Story 2 - after all this time and he still hasn’t forced her to get some mental help? I’ve lost all sympathy for the dude

[@pandemoniumglaciers82]

Can't force it dude

[@VesnaVK]

Dude thinks his problem is about the money they got sued for.

[@reptiles3244]

@@pandemoniumglaciers82 yeah actually you can

[@pandemoniumglaciers82]

@@reptiles3244 what is he going to do tie her up and drag her?

[@reptiles3244]

@@pandemoniumglaciers82 no declare her incompetent have him assigned as her care giver and call police when she refuses to go to treatments it's literally something that happens all the time it's usually issued by courts but can be issued by a concerned party related to the person

[@nikkiwhray1598]

In the 2nd story, it sounds like OP's wife's opinion of Laura is pure projection. She is either a complete narcissist, or she is so deeply insecure that she is now a delusional wreck who is totally ruled by jealousy and hatred.

[@damien678]

Just to be clear, that second option is how a lot of NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) people are which is just a bit funny considering the first option lol

[@sameerkatte4895]

OP's wife is like Timmy Turner's dad with Laura being her Dinkleburg.

[@DaWhiteWolffie]

Last one should've gone to jail. Jealously is truly ugly.

[@Mapache095]

The fact that OP in story 1 blames themselves for what happened is so heartbreaking. They were as much as a victim as Mike. The blame resides solely with Emma and Lisa

[@TsukiKageTora]

Story 2: I would divorce her immediately, not for the financial burden but for the absolute psychopath I married and see if I can file for and get a restraining order

[@simac8396]

Story 2: she dosent want to see a therapist because she won't be Able to manipulate them.

[@Kirby-zp6cg]

I understand that people should trust their Spouses and try to get their side, but I honestly do not at all blame OP when she was giving loads of “evidence” in the form of photos and text message screenshots.

[@ActionNoJackson]

Then you're idiot too... if anyone gives you any information that will destroy multiple people lives please seek evidence to prove that its true

[@draconisdragonheart4248]

Actually she is to blame. She is the cause of the other woman losing her husband. All she had to do was to check phone records and that would have cleared this up.

[@natetsh]

Story 2 : The fact that he stayed with her is crazy..

[@crem-crem4070]

Story 2: reminds me of a movie I once watched in which a man was kidnapped, tortured and killed because a woman had taken his likeness and pretended to be him on dating apps as an escape from her reality. A woman then committed suicide because of something the lady had said. It was really tragic and hearing that people like that really exists fucking disgusts me

[@Dragonemperess]

Which movie was that if you know it? Sounds interesting.

[@forsomenotreally]

My heart goes out to OP in the first story. If I was her husband I would defiantly go no contact with sister and her friend, let them know the damage they caused to many people. As for getting back together with the OP, no. Once something is broken, it will never be the same, it will be weaker, maybe go to counseling together but with no expectations of anything.

[@jesterbrown90]

Story 2: OP needs to prep for divorce and the aftermath that's sure to follow. Pull that trigger the second everything's in place. His wife can't be fixed if she refuses to get help, let alone that she did anything wrong to begin with.

[@Amna613]

Story 1: i cannot blame OP for trusting a person she thought was her friend. I hope it works out for her.

[@ultimatedumbass4640]

I mean the fact she trusted a friend over her own husband speaks volumes about how much she trusted him (or lack thereof) imo.

[@sdragonfly5549]

1. OPs sister in law weaponized her past trauma with cheating and her insecurities against her. How conniving. Emma is equally gross in that she got out of an abusive relationship only to heap pain and sadness on others. It's sad that her experiences only taught her to hurt others instead of empathy. It probably didn't help that Emma and SIL were feeding off each other now they are just eating each other alive. What a cantankerous friendship. 2. OP clearly needs to make therapy conditional. His wife is having some kind of mental break or maybe this has been ongoing and untreated for a while. The friendship test, this whole conspiracy, Laura being thisawful person and she can't explain it, her disproptionate jealousy, her lack of remorse and inability to self-reflect, how she automatically thinks the therapist and people in her life are out to get her and Judge her. Something isn't right here and she obviously needs therapy.

[@GIChiyo]

Story 2: I can't believe people who are this vindictive and psychotic exists, just wow...

[@justlooking1299]

Story 1 is really ridiculous but not nothing surprises me. When people decide that you don’t belong together they really do crazy shit

[@digit5465]

Without going into too much, I’m in the same boat as OP. I was outcasted by my friends who believed my manipulative ex over me who had truth. Op did the right thing by finding the truth and making amends, she did all she could now but as for the ex husband, i can’t have a say. It’s his choice to make

[@digit5465]

@@LostSoulchild89 thank you so much, my friends that listened to me are helping me and some are gonna try to get them to listen to me and get them to learn the truth. Its gonna take a long time but i hope things go well

[@playamusa]

Story 2: It's interesting that OP talked about the incels and mysognists that messaged him and how disgusted he was, but then proceeds to describe how his own wife is just as mysognistic against her ex friend and even body shamed the husband.. He might think he can't do any better than his crazy wife. The delusional is maddening.

[@maxinemyers9215]

In the second story his wife is a nasty jealous woman!! Thanks Mark💐

[@AndyyWithAY]

He stayed the night 👀👀 What happened? I'm glad that the collegue got back with her husband. She was completely innocent. I wonder why the sister involved her?

[@ajzephyros7454]

She needed a patsy, a female to blame the cheating on that OP was already insecure about. Sister didn't give a damn that she would be collateral damage

[@paulastiles5507]

LOL! I know, right? But since they're still technically married, there's not a whole lot Emma has to squawk about, even without the whole "We conned him into leaving you" angle.

[@PavillionKing]

Because she was a point of OP's insecurity. OP said that the colleague was working closely with her husband & that made her jealous and insecure. The sister took advantage of that insecurity & a totally innocent couple was unfortunately caught in the crossfire.

[@mandalorianhunter1]

Husband deserves better. OP was dumb throughout the story.

[@paulastiles5507]

@@PavillionKing Thank you, Captain Obvious. It was still dumb.

[@itsjustme7487]

Story 2... OP. your wife REALLY needs therapy. She's lucky she has such a great husband.

[@pezchef7577]

that second story is wild. I've never heard somebody downplay their spouse's monsterous actions like OP consistenly did. holy moly

[@jen6106]

How can Story 1 OP survived this whole time without a brain? Lol.. ruining another marriage, she deserves to be called out.. pathetic.. she is so insecure

[@cynthiadollins4393]

Story about wife being sued, the wife needs to be in therapy now. Don't take any excuse, therapy or divorce. She also needs to work full-time, she needs to be so busy she doesn't have time to mess with people.

[@lunahix4815]

Story 1: What the SIL did was absolutely disgusting. Story 2: Holy Cannoli, Batman! The wife is batshit clinical crazy!

[@meezerluvr]

Story 2: I'm generally against divorce, but this is the most divorce-worthy situation I've heard about in a long time. OP should forget couples therapy for now and get his wife into 1-1 therapy. If she refuses, divorce and a restraining order are probably his best options.

[@morallygary9098]

Obviously only gotten into story one- right before the update- but… OP telling her newly divorcing husband is the LEAST she can do. It’s a very good thing I didn’t find that story, because while I understand what she did… she didn’t trust her partner- at all. And she very much does not deserve him back, even if he could forgive her, she’d better work her ass off for even the possibility of it.

[@GiordanDiodato]

the only issue i see is that he doesn't believe her.

[@JohnAlcott238]

I mean what is she supposed to think? Oh these pictures were faked?

[@morallygary9098]

@@JohnAlcott238 that maybe she should trust her partner… like at all, over his sister? Like, no I don’t think the assumption should always be that the sister is lying, but she married her husband, not his sister. She just kept on trucking until he finally gave up. Just “nope! Definitely a cheater, sure the only proof I have are screenshots on someone else’s phone- someone not involved in the cheating at all- but clearly he is definitely a cheater!” OP went all in on this. Never go whole hog on an accusation like that, even if the source seems reliable, the source of the screenshots for Sister might not be, as was the case here, seeing as the sister faked them. If you just take the word of a third party that your partner is cheating on you and never let them even try to defend themself? You deserve to lose them.

[@disneydork100]

@@morallygary9098 SIL also had freaking pictures, and OP trusted SIL like she was her own sister Plus who would suspect someone to lie and paint their own sibling as something like a cheater? I get “trust your partner” but if she had asked Reddit before talking to her husband about the cheating after SIL initially handed her that proof, Reddit would have absolutely told her to leave him.

[@KE-hr4sb]

"What I did next is very questionable." Nope. They purposely destroyed your marriage and didn't care who was caught in the crossfire. She deserves to have her privacy invaded for being a homewrecker (she may not have cheated herself but she ended both your marriage and his coworker's) with her selfish actions. Let me reiterate: YOU didn't end your marriage or the coworker's. Your horrible SIL and her friend did. S2: "Stop dissing my wife, she can become a better person!" Dude. She's a grown woman, so a little late for that now. Not only that, she had the several years she was burning that poor girl's life to the ground to "be a better person," and instead put her energy into destroying someone else. Your wife is a lost cause and you get to pay for her pettiness if you keep excusing it. If her ex-friend was as bad of a person as your wife insists, a) your wife wouldn't have had to make shit up to prove it and b) all those people would not have stood up for her and testified on her behalf as a character witness. However your wife's actions speak louder than words, and *she* is actually the terrible one. "My wife didn't have to go to jail because she has family members in law enforcement." Of fucking course she does.

[@335chr]

No op in story one did it too

[@paulastiles5507]

Yeah, the part where OP's wife in Story #2 was using her relatives in law enforcement to duck punishment was pretty yikes.

[@KE-hr4sb]

​@@335chr Nope. She trusted someone she loved that had "proof." If you've ever read any cheater subs, I've never seen one where the cheater admits to it even with (actual) proof staring them in the face. It also sounds like, once she explained to her husband and asked him to flip the roles, what would he have believed, that he didn't have an answer. I've experienced this. My ex lied and gaslit and projected, accusing me of cheating. Eventually, however, his lies started to contradict each other. When I called him out and we sat down and had a conversation about what the heck was going on, it finally unraveled that he was actually propositioning other women for sex, but as of that point, all of them had turned him down. I went to bed to continue the conversation in the morning with a cooler head. The next day, when I tried to pick up where we had left off to figure out where we go from there, he tried again to deny that he was attempting to cheat with three other women. I was like, "Dude, you admitted it to me last night." His brilliant response? "Oh." Cheating is a deal-breaker for me and I had already decided I was done, but that right there was the nail in the coffin: He had no intention of changing, or trying to fix things, he wasn't sorry, and he intended to keep right on lying and cheating.

[@335chr]

@@KE-hr4sb Ops reaction is understandable just wrong

[@KE-hr4sb]

@@335chr You do the best you can with the information you have. And that, is on SIL and her friend for purposely giving her falsified information.

[@Ezmera]

The second story is insaaaaane! That lady is completely nuts! She sounds like a narcissist if we're being real here.

[@tegantalks9612]

Story 1: they need to report Lisa’s threats to the cops and get a paper trail going because you can guarantee she is going to escalate her behaviour.

[@kg8482]

The husband tried to make her see reason for months before he agreed to a divorce. She honestly doesn't deserve him if she couldn't even give him one chance to explain or tell him everything

[@anonymouslee2083]

Story 2: OP’s wife is what evil looks like. She should have gotten jail

[@hubbachubba1]

Story 2: Holy mackerel! OP’s wife is unhinged. I wouldn’t be able to stay married to someone who could do something so dreadful to someone else. Even if there was a falling out, this is beyond the pale.

[@MrZuriax]

OP in the second story should feel ashamed and embarrassed to still call that black hole of projection and jealousy his wife. She tried to systematically destroy another person's life and he's too caught up in the financial fallout to realize he's married to a monster. Hope he leaves her before she does the same to him.

[@83gemm]

Yikes. Just…. Yikes. First off, OP needs some freaking therapy. She is so full of self hatred. She had WAY more hatred for herself than her SIL. She. Let. Them. In. Her. Home. The only real mistake she made was not telling where she got the information. Even that was done out of kindness. I understand it’s 2022, but there were photos. My first thought when seeing those photos would not have been, oh, SIL fabricated these so my husband would leave me to get with her friend. But I understand the husband’s hurt, too. Nothing is more painful than everyone believing you are a liar when you aren’t. I can’t believe she almost didn’t tell him about what she learned about SIL and Emma.

[@Mewse1203]

Stpry 2: sounds like OP's wife is projecting her own behavior onto her former friend.

[@chaudx]

Story 2: OP is delusional...dude needs to GTFO ASAP, she'll drag him down with her, either by doing something even more crazy or by making he spend every last dime on law suits. That woman should be arrested and thrown on a psych ward...she'll for sure try again maybe with someone else , she's not one bit remorseful she's just mad she got caught

[@KCCAT5]

Her first mistake in Story number one was not telling her husband who showed her the proof. She should have come right out and said that it was his sister

[@joimumu]

Agree and what did Op think was going to happen? That she and Op sister would stay friends?

[@dokikicingene1517]

You know what this reminds me of, the first story reminds me of that one op who's sister didn't like the fiance so she staged a fake cheating scandal by deleting his messages and sitting up her own underwear in his room so that his fiance would see it think he's cheating and then leave him. Which did happen and her and her family hate him. He's been most of his time mourning the loss thinking that she was a liar a two-timer stuff like that and that she didn't deserve him. Just for his sister too later reveal it during a drunken super that she was the one who caused the whole situation and even having her parents back her up in that it was good for him that she left him. Hope you felt so bad that his girlfriend think that he cheated on her and the fact that his own sister would lie to him and heard him that he basically distanced himself from the family and got off the grid. It was a really terrible and traumatizing experience for Opie and my heart breaks even when I was listening to it I really hope that man is okay the way it just ended like that made me think the worst but that was still messed up. Seriously communication is key but there are situations where if everything really does look that bad you got to go with your guts and the girlfriend even if she was wrong and not trusting him at the time emotions are strong and whether we hate to admit it they do guide our actions. I mean really if you are in the position of the girl friend was in would you have believed him. And if you were in a position of Opie you will be so confused and startled you wouldn't know which way to go or what to say,he was cut off guard. It probably felt like the whole world was against him. Honestly sometimes people are the worst and sometimes you just got to have to go through two choices do you trust them enough to believe them and get your own evidence or do you trust in others who you thought you could trust and believe that maybe this person that you were the most faithful to was not faithful to you. Honestly I'm not sure how anyone would react every personality and person is different honestly this was just a toxic situation all around that's sister is not a good person, I don't care how she tries to spend this or how she thinks she's going to cover for herself but I don't think family is going to save her on this one

[@paulastiles5507]

Story #1: OP was very, very dumb. NTA, but still very, very dumb. She should have confirmed some things independently (and why didn't Jamie's lawyer?) and not kept her source to herself. That was totally playing into Lisa's hands. I had a friend who got this kind of scam pulled on her to make her husband think she was cheating and break up with her. He wound up marrying the woman who engineered it, had regrets, realized what was going on and was going to get back with my friend, then mysteriously ended up dead very shortly afterward. There are people who pull this kind of con. They can be very dangerous. Beware.

[@mandalorianhunter1]

OP was dumb, to believe the lies, to let Lisa and Emma into her place and not even call the cops like WTF is wrong with her

[@paulastiles5507]

@@mandalorianhunter1 She keeps saying throughout the story, "I know that was dumb" and then continuing to be dumb. It's a bit exasperating. NTA overall, though.

[@mandalorianhunter1]

@@paulastiles5507 I would say she is the asshole for not being smarter about the situation and not thinking things through. She should be glad she deleted her account

[@bribri2925]

Man there are some terrifying people out there. Which is why I think there needs to be some type of register for people who do crazy stuff like this. The world deserves to know what type of person you are so that they can then make the choice if they want you in their lives. (I know it sounds very controlling, and that people can change as they get older and truly feel remorse, but I’d like to know if these things happened . it’s scary if you make a new friend or find a significant other and not know they could’ve done something like this, and you let them get close in your life.)

[@TailsFan]

@@paulastiles5507 OP is saying "I know that was dumb" in retrospect. At the time, she didn't realize it was dumb.

[@er5504]

S2: Note that OP starts by saying he resents his wife for the money he's paying for the lawsuit. Not that he's upset that his wife did something psychotic and won't get help. Maybe it's best for everyone else that these 2 stick together.

[@alissaroberts2545]

Story 2, I'm surprised the judge didn't mandate therapy.

[@videofan1010]

Ok - OP#1 wasn't truly stupid until she let the SIL and friend into her apartment...

[@AutumnFire1414]

Story 2: Laura had "failed the loyalty test" that OP's wife had done by dating Matt (after OP's wife encouraged her to do so). Finally, OP lets drop the first red flag of why his wife is a nutjob and an unhealthy person to be around. Second red flag is that OP's wife was envious over Laura's weight loss. Third red flag: OP's wife wanted to do some snooping on Laura because she was jealous of Laura's success. Dude. Duuuuuuuuude. Run. Take the NopeTrain to Nopeville and Nope the heck out of the marriage. The wife has some serious mental problems. No, she did not get carried away. Normal people DO NOT DO THIS!

[@gigga143]

Story 2: the husband is in denial about his wife being a complete psychopath. she should be in jail and the court should have ordered her to have to have therapy. her being giving a slap on the wrist and her husband standing by her and paying her fines is why she still doesn't get how atrocious, vicious and horrid what she did is. she definitely needs individual therapy before worrying about couple's therapy.she'll probably do something like this again but just cover her tracks better as long as she is not held to any accountability.

[@DarqueQueen7]

Last story? OP is so deep in the fog over his mad wife, we should just say he's lost at sea and leave it at that.

[@marierey6216]

Perfect background noise while I decorate my sisters cake last minute 🎂

[@stillvisibletoallusers]

I just finished my nephews Roblox cake lol. Also last minute. Oops.

[@bribri2925]

Drama and the cake😂

[@roelthas]

You trolled me for a moment there, I was expecting a further update than that old one.

[@bee-le4tr]

It’s super saddening to see the husband go through story 2, I hope the situation with his wife resolves itself and she either realizes how crazy she was acting or gets distance with the husband. I hope she does realize as it seems that’s what the husband wants to happen.

[@身赤-w3w]

Husband's family is never your friend

[@jenniferslack-smith5129]

I’m so glad that the innocent colleague’s life has being mended.

[@tinamelton6491]

Bring a lawsuit against her for lying and destroying your marriage. Her and her girlfriend

[@deppnut1]

Story 2, if I were the wife's employer I would not keep her around. How could she be trusted with personal information on clients. If I were a client and found out about what she did I would be finding a new RMT elsewhere. The husband needs to get out of that marriage and keep copies of all the court documents for when she tries to pull crazy accusations on him. How can he possibly go forward believing a single word she says.

[@Wynterblytz]

Dude. she is delusional. She is gross. She will always do this to others. And it's to someone she hadn't talked to for years. Suddenly she sees a person doing better than her and suddenly she's an FBI agent with nothing better to do

[@AndyyWithAY]

Wow husband really got with the manipulative friend. Just horrible.

[@bloodyjuicebox2178]

“We can solve our problems at home “ idk why but when I heard that I instantly thought that that was such a mom response and I didn’t know why

[@CodenameTurtle]

Story 2: Wow, that's a huge massive dealbreaker. I wouldnt want to be in the same country as that person, let alone marriage

[@andrewi.crocker8675]

Story 2: At the beginning I was like, "well this depends i guess on why the wife was sued." Then, after hearing the story my reaction is WHY DIDN'T OP IMMEDIATELY DIVORCE THIS PSYCHO?!?

[@personneici2595]

Story #1: I'd sue the SIL. She needs consequences. Story #2: OP's wife needs to get into therapy immediately and find out why she has this paranoid fixation and work through it. OP needs to have hard limits otherwise this is just the beginning of their issues. She has zero contrition which is a terrible sign.

[@beingWantable]

Adter story 1: I heard and read multiple times: real life is stranger than fiction... these stories always proof it time and time again. So fascinating

[@meOW0131]

Not gonna lie, the sister doing that seems traumatizing. They need marriage counseling and to block that sister. She's vile as hell.

[@TheTrueKarin]

Yeah, I remember the story on Reddit. There was an interesting comment where a user suggested that maybe op’s wife went threw a midlife crisis ( a job where you not get rich, not really healthy, oversize) and on the bottom of it ( she probably cheated on OP to feel young again) she saw her ex friend and focused all her own mistakes and wrongdoing on her friend. It never was truly the friend she was angry own. She was just made that there relationship from back then was not anymore. She probably was a imagined Queen B and her friend the oversized fifth real on the weagon. All the things she accused the ex friend did were here doing (cheating on her husband, drug use etc.) and in combination with her depression and other mental healthy problems it manifested as a Wahn to show her ex friend true colors. She probably thought, that she somehow prove that her ex friend like she said was that her mistakes were forgiven. That the guilt went away. That is also probably the reason that the wife in the end was not truly remorseful. This idea was still manifested in her mind.

[@danes.4551]

Second story-- why the HELL did this guy not divorce this crazy woman already?! Vindictive behavior isn't a "fuck up", it's a choice-- imagine what this woman would do to her husband, or potential children, if she believed they'd slighted her?? This is cruel and horrible.

[@Jenkinscraftingco2.0]

Story 2: showed it to my husband and he said he’d automatically ask for a divorce if I pulled an asinine stunt like this. This is unforgivable