Marriage is HARD WORK | Winning An Award and Settling Into The UK

Hey guys, so this is the VERY first video I edited using software on a laptop and it super stressed me out! So, please be kind to let me know what you think of the edits. I am still learning so hopefully I improve over time. I have shot and edited all my videos until now using my phone so this change is a lot for me lol. Enough ranting, in this video I share my thoughts so far on marriage, the UK Alumni Award I won and what it's been like settling back into the UK. Please LIKE and COMMENT, thank you!
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[@ijeomai3746]

Congratulations for all you have achieved and attained! I have been married for 27 years!!! and still loving every minute of it! LOL I have a 25 year old! The secrets are pretty simple! You must be friends! Willing and open to talk to each other about EVERY and ANY thing! Mutual respect!! MUTUAL! HE works hard to make and keep you happy and you do the exact same for him and that is why you enjoy doing stuff for him! Recognizing that you are a team, on the same team fighitng the world not each other! Choose your battles! This took me forever and even now I struggle sometimes. If noone will die Ignore, pause, don't say it! CHew gum to stop yourself from saying it (no kidding). Better than saying the wrong thing because you can't take it back and he may forgive but may never forget! MAke each other laugh! A LOT!. We still get complaints from our kids about the 2am episodes of laughter that come from our bedroom downstairs (they are all up) You will be fine. I see all the signs! Enjoy it!! Now !! or you will have to wait until they all leave home which is a very long time!! Best to You!

[@ChideraPeters]

This is very detailed. Thank you so much Ijeoma, and yes we’ll enjoy it now 😂, bless you!♥️

[@fumilayooluwagbemi127]

Infact you bare my mind ma'am Ijeoma.. I ve been married for 11years and I can say it with my full chest in addition to all you ve said, please marry your best friend and someone who is kind. That advise of chewing gum instead of saying what will not finish for years, I am so taking it.. Let me go and buy as much chewing gum as possible because I can talk and then come back to say sorry when an supposed to be the one taking the sorry

[@ijeomai3746]

@@ChideraPeters And you too! The fact that you get it so early in your marriage means you will be fine. SO many young women would still be in cloud cuckoo land oblivious of what is ahead :or they will tell you to just pray!! Hehehe! It is work! Best!

[@ijeomai3746]

@@fumilayooluwagbemi127 Yes, I speak to a lot of young women and the "gum stop" talk gets them each time. I challenge them to try it! ALways have your favorite flavour in your purse/handbag. Best!

[@chinemeremugwu2058]

@Ijeoma thank you so much for sharing this... I'm not married yet but I'm gonna frame this so it can sink deeply even before I get married. God bless you richly.

[@bridgetbridget8358]

I think if we approach love from the point of view that ' love is about giving' then it can start a mindset shift that can bring success in marriage and relationships. Love is often seen as the 'emotion and mushiness' but it does go a looonnnnngggg way beyond that . The bible says For God so love the world that He gave...... so in love you give! Yes there's sweet emotion and all but there's giving- your time, commitment, heart, money, and much more! Yes 'Dera it's love you feel when you serve him lunch and fill a fulfilment. I still get that joy after almost 20 years in it! Work at it darling you're on the right track and keep loving on yourselves with God at the centre xx

[@ChideraPeters]

Oh thank you so much for sharing this Bridget. It does help ♥️♥️

[@ijeomai3746]

AND be esch other's ROCK. If he is having a hard time, no matter how much it hurts or how hard it is for you, don't also fall apart! Be strong for each other and if you want to cry, cry in secret during difficult times for him. So he doesn;t see your distress and fall deeper into dark times! This is hard but doable! It is very hard. You really wnat to cry but seing how hurt he is, you just cannot!

[@TochiEsther]

Marriage is really beautiful especially when you marry your friend and both of you are committed to make it work.

[@mrb6759]

I think you have answered your own question. I have been married for over 20 yrs. Yes, you will argue but as long as there is no violence and abuse, please stay and make it work. I see my wife as part of me and any inconvenience to her is an inconvenience to me.

[@ChideraPeters]

Thank you so much Mr B!

[@adaugonwosu]

I've been married for over two years, and I can tell you that marriage is one of the most beautiful blessings we have from God. My husband serves me much more than I serve him, and he enjoys doing almost everything for me, so Babygirl is enjoying herself. So, when we misunderstand each other and argue, we don't take long to let it go, and start playing around again. Marriage is sweet joor!!!

[@jujun6465]

You are still a long way to go dear. That’s what I thought when I was two years into my marriage.

[@sol_4real]

@@jujun6465 you are wrong, that it was that way for you those not mean it's the same for others

[@oritsela]

It's funny you say that about loving serving your husband, as sometimes this feminist mentality makes women feel like it is a bad thing to want to do things for your husband. I totally get what you are saying. I used to be like that too! And now, almost ten years in, I love nothing more than doing those "wifey" things. Feminism means having a CHOICE and this is what I choose! Abeg make that swallow and draw soup 😬

[@bukayomi1]

feminism in my opinion is for the workplace, business world and d world outside d home. When you get to the front door of your home, drop d feminist personality and put on the wife/mother personality till d next time you leave d House again for hustle. a home shd be a relaxing place.

[@zee7491]

Congratulations again Chidera. Marriage is hardworking honestly, there is no lie there. But one has to put in the work. I'll be 14years married soon and I got married at 23. I can't even believe I'm still married, cause I kept thinking at some point I will go back to my parents🤣🤣. But it gets better and better, i promise with understanding. I cannot finish putting in so much work and walk away so easily. We are stuck. Chai see how words disappeared from your mouth the moment he walked in😍

[@joyugbome]

🤣 got married last year August and it's been a beautiful ride. Marriage is not easy but not as hard as some people make it seem. I'm married to my friend who helps and supports me and is never looking to stress me. I'm just sha tired of cooking and mopping floors 🤣🤣🤣 I love my hubby though! My man fine and sweet!

[@chisomsingz6142]

I've been married for a year and this was exactly how I felt at the beginning. I remember someone once told me that the first year of marriage is the hardest and that if you successful cross it peaceful ,then your marriage will most likely last forever. Now I understand what she meant 😄. Just put in the effort to understand your partner. It gets easier if you ask me. Basically, you really just have to come to terms with the fact that no matter how angry you get or how many times they annoy you, Omo! you are going no where. Staying angry is simply just giving yourself unnecessary headaches. Another side to marriage you should anticipate is the 'see-finish' part. Basically when your partner knows everything about you, and can literally predict your next move😁 All the best, Chidera and Congratulations on your award!❤️

[@ChideraPeters]

Lol looking forward to the “see finish part” 😂 and thanks so much for sharing. Like you said, hopefully it gets easier ♥️

[@zee7491]

Yea 1st year is the hardest, but for me, its not only first year *my opinion sha. Not easy honestly.

[@fjohn8985]

Look for a book named _Boundaries_ _in_ _Marriage_ and take a read. It is also available as an ebook or audiobook. Check the reviews online.

[@adeyinkalewis7898]

Married for 12 years! You will need to ignore and let go of some anger. God bless your union.

[@ChideraPeters]

Amen and thank you

[@adeyinkalewis7898]

@@ChideraPeters Enjoy the union. Make a review after 5 years! 😊

[@DynamicDoris]

And yes, I'll love to see a video on the things you love about being married

[@ChideraPeters]

Noted Doris

[@fionaxdairy1297]

Every time I see your notification of your video my happy time begins, I am so exited to watch till the end.

[@ChideraPeters]

Awwnn thank you so much ♥️

[@angelkosi]

I love how realistic you make your videos look. Just see the ending... so real and it wasn't cut out. You make KZbin look easy. I like that. Keep the videos coming 👏👏

[@estherwilson5688]

That's nice dear. So I was thinking, since you work from home, making some pastries or something and sending them to your neighbours can be a start for a friendly relationship and neighbours

[@faridahtheexplorer]

I love your analogy about work colleagues, quitting and marriage 🙌👏 taking notes haha. It's key to always remember one's why🙌

[@ChideraPeters]

You’re welcome 😌😂

[@francinedames9981]

I have been married for 16 years and yessssss it is work. I am more on the quiet side and hubby talks. So we both had to learn and understand each other. Respect and trust is also important. I must say I am loving the journey. Blessings on your union. Enjoy each other...❤❤❤

[@happinessonabolu3638]

The intro sha shock me 😹😹 E be like igbo film🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Congratulations once again Mrs. Asiedu for your Award 🏆

[@ChideraPeters]

Lol I’m Igbo what were you expecting 🌝😂😂

[@happinessonabolu3638]

😂😂@@ChideraPeters

[@phyl_mo]

I’ve been married for one year and I’m still learning…. It beats my imagination every single time that you and I, are so alike… the advice I’d give you is to always give things a little time, don’t be quick to respond to things generally… because when the dust settles, you might have a different perspective😁😁😁😁 my love to Jason 💜

[@MaryIbe]

Congratulations on your award 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 The social connection may take awhile but it will definitely come, Preach sis!😂hard or no hard we will marry and it must work in Jesus name 🤣🤣🤣🙏🏽

[@TimiAlo]

Ohhhhh you finally spoke on relocating. I think it’s even worse when you move from one country to another. “Dishing out forgiveness on a daily is so accurate. Marriage spotlights our flaws.” - Chidera I like how real you are on this, like you are with other videos.

[@DynamicDoris]

Awwww. Totally enjoyed watching. I love how realistic you were in the video. 🤗

[@ChideraPeters]

Thank youuuu

[@MissPrisyBaby]

Congratulations on your award Chidera👏🏽🎉

[@ihuomanwoke5873]

Thank God, girl! Congratulations! More of God’s graces! You’re blessed, rejoice in the Lord, thank Him, for everything! Stay always, blessed!

[@onyinyechukwu2610]

True to the core . It will try you in ways you never thought possible. By the time you get to 13th year like me , everybody go learn to vex silently and continue loving .

[@ChideraPeters]

Lol facts only 😂♥️

[@funmio4892]

Hi chidera been married for 10 years, and yes you are in the right track, the fact that you are both committed to the process, the fact that God is at the centre, as long as you are both seeking the good of each other and believing the best of each other you will be fine. And it gets better really. No formula just build your own path, like you are doing already and trust God for the best.

[@ChideraPeters]

Thank you so much Funmi ♥️

[@ihuomaanthony8800]

😁😁😁😁😁😁 this is absolutely true ooo, been married for over 16yrs! Chimdera u re right, u have to get ready to be dishing out forgiveness on a daily basis. It's not easy, hard work, commitment, love, forgiveness, patience, application, prayer, all of these and more put together makes marriage works.

[@olayinkaadeleke7089]

4years in the Uk now,I still don’t av any friend apart from my family.I am always happy when it’s summer.

[@salomeolukorede5958]

The moment love of her life walked in, babe was just confused. So cute 😍

[@ferdimako]

You have to know that you annoy them too. That is the spirit to scale through.

[@CathysJournal]

Being married for as long as 15 years, it is work in progress🥰 Especially when kids start coming into the picture, your stress level is almost shooting out through the roof. Sometimes you just want to be on your own 'make nobody near you'. But one thing I've learnt over the years is that, married couples need to always do things together. This is an example from Priscilla and Aquila in the Bible. One is not mentioned without the other. Married couples should try to do almost everything possible together, even using the loo, the other one can be nearby and the conversation continues. It is not policing each other but learning to enjoy each other's company, building each other's strength to cope with difficulties that "will" arise. Not "may' arise. It makes it difficult for 3rd party to plant a seed of discord. That doesn't mean you won't enjoy fun times without the other. This makes you miss each other when apart from despite the downsides that come in marriage. Congratulations on the award💐

[@graceHumphreyy]

Girl that forgiveness part 😂. I'm definitely saving this video for the future. I really love the way this hair looks on you and your outfit too. Chidera you're really glowing!

[@ChideraPeters]

Thanks Grace!☺️

[@adedoyinabiodun5155]

The first year is the hardest. It gets better and even more blissful as you go.☺️

[@annatama2668]

CONGRATULATIONS on your award. Many more wins to come ❤

[@theugandanvillagewife6647]

Its been over 5yrs since moving to UK and i can feel you sis! However, at least you got a church community. Marriage is like a child its natured along the way Congratulations on your award.

[@kennyjames9254]

I can totally relate on how difficult it can be making friends. I came as a dependant on my partner, I have spent 1 year in the UK and have got no friends, and I also work from home full time. Really makes me miss home 😞😢

[@ChideraPeters]

Awww sending you HUGS 🤗

[@kennyjames9254]

@@ChideraPeters thanks hon x

[@garmbryhewwert7059]

Chidera is feeling isolated maybe she should get herself a part time job a few hours a week just to get out the house or apply for some voluntary work, working from home can be hard.

[@kennyjames9254]

@@garmbryhewwert7059 Brilliant idea! I really plan doing the same as well. It’s been a struggle working from home.

[@TheEstherBabs]

your expressions really funny honestly 😂😂....im single though hopefully when i get married i will be able relate...wishing you the best

[@foyekealayande2096]

Congratulations ❤

[@mercybadoe3086]

Congratulations on your award! I’m approaching marriage and I’m getting so nervous! Like I’ll be losing a piece of myself or that I’ve not maximized my single hood and total freedom lol! 😮‍💨

[@angelfortunee]

Fully committed to cooking for you at intervals lol

[@Elldrop1]

Professional and structured as always. Happy to hear the bliss continues 😁

[@ChideraPeters]

El! Thank you so muchhhh♥️♥️♥️

[@maryamjimoh8617]

Congratulations.... So on point about moving to a new place due to marriage

[@ChideraPeters]

I know rightttt

[@phyl_mo]

Chidera ohhhh… this is me… I had to move from Abuja to Akure because of marriage and I work from home too… no friends no community whatsoever…. I get bored and lonely a lot….. so it’s not only aroad ohhhh

[@tolusdiary9437]

Chidera😂😂😂, marriage is awesome. Yes it has it challenges. Remember that you are one. Do things together and do NOT let third parties into your marriage. Put each other first, Communicate, Commmunicate, Communicate. Never make assumptions. All the best. You and Jason are an awesome couple.

[@oluwayemisioyinloye3307]

I can say it gets better. Just keep putting your best foot forward. It definitely gets better 🤣🤣

[@GrayShores]

He asked you to edit that part and you didn't 😂... Congratulations once again on the award and thanks for your balanced analysis of marriage 🤗

[@ChideraPeters]

🌝😌😂

[@omasspace1561]

Hi chi dear,I love watching your videos and how real you are too.trust me I can relate with what you’re saying and how you feel,you would be fine dear ,I have been married for 8 year and everyday I keep praying for Grace to continue to pull through…you would be fine dear.God bless you and Jason 🙏❤️

[@ambitiousbelmondo9219]

Jovial girl! I like the way you are positively inclined always full of laughs, your personality is great too in the sense that you're kind of self-sufficient with brighter days ahead of you!! 😊 I wish to both of you the sky🌅🌅🌅

[@nkemnwobu]

I like how you're gradually picking up the Ghanaian accent 😍😍

[@curvel7746]

Beautiful video. Its nice that u enjoy serving him. The forgiveness part was funny. I think that is one of my weak points also. Maybe if we look at extending forgiveness as also an act of service to others to make their life happier(as it enhances the relationship) then it might help a bit. In terms of living abroad and not having friends ive realized for me the easiest way to make friends is to find them in church. Church ppl are usually more open to embracing u. Maybe u can join a youth ministry or womens ministry at church. Or even an ngo or volunteer group to do outdoor activities to help others. 🇹🇹🇹🇹

[@abiashom557]

This was very helpful and interesting. Thank you Chidera. I was smiling all through.

[@euniceonu7515]

Hi chidera, congratulations. You probably would remember me, hopefully. Thanks for your advice, my marriage has been sweet, 1 year plus and I'm glad I made this choice and not allow cultural rites affect my decisions. You're right to say it requires lot of commitment because it definitely does, you also would need to overlook a lot of things and treat them like a child. E no easy but e sweet with the right person who also respects the institution.

[@Nursepeace]

I have been married for 14 years and just don't take everything too serious and trust your partner

[@lydiadaniel1245]

Awww congratulations dearie...🥰🥰🥰more wins!🏆🙏

[@chibuzorhenryochu9967]

Off topic,sorry! I want to ask you, how strict are the UK in enforcement of the 20 hours a week work permit for students? I ask this because I am in the UK now, I comply with the rules but I know A LOT of people who simply go about doing way more than the permitted duration with reckless abandon and it almost seems like they get away with it.?? What do you have to say from your experience?

[@Angie_Linaa]

Was in a relationship for 7years,married for a month,and yes married is a whole work but it’s fun. They say the first year is critical,I’m yet to see because that 7years relationship was everything. I

[@abbydegaila9743]

Congratulations 🎊 I enjoy watching your videos Please keep the marriage videos coming 🙏 Am learning so much here 😌

[@ChideraPeters]

😂 I sure will and thank youuuu ♥️

[@GlaDiary36]

Nice sharing your opinion about marriage with us as newly wedded so you already had the reality idea on like we single ladies with different mindset

[@sunshinescorner810]

Congratulations baby girl on your your award Love ya 💕

[@ChideraPeters]

Love you right back!

[@victorquagraine9155]

His food is on point. Congrats guys

[@angelfortunee]

The every small thing you go dey vex thing is me babe omo. Me and my roommate, I'm DELIBERATELY learning. I love my space, put things exactly how you met them (that way I don't have to look for stuff), I just realised my feelings are very sensitive and I am seriously learning and it's HARD! LOL

[@ChideraPeters]

Lol yeah definitely hard but baby steps eh? We can do this 😁

[@wawadirolande9831]

Congratulations on your win!!!

[@francestamuno5820]

Oh my God, Chidera you are funny. Thanks for this one.

[@ChideraPeters]

You’re welcome 🤗

[@igohedimma4691]

Congratulations on ur award 🥇🥰

[@phyl_mo]

Congratulations on your award again 🥰🥰🥰

[@angelfortunee]

Why am I just seeing this video, I'm sha clapping

[@ChideraPeters]

😂😂

[@prudenceokonna7551]

Love this honest conversation.

[@adaugonwosu]

Yeah, the forgiving part is for real ooo. For me, I even forgive in advance because I know that my husband will do something that may get me upset. He annoys me, I annoy him too. So, in marriage, forgiveness is your middle name oo.

[@lifewithdorine6428]

Congratulations on your award 💕

[@Charline676]

All the best Chichi❤️❤️❤️

[@amandastvshow247]

Congratulations. U will get use to it

[@vanessammesomanwadiora7413]

Congratulations chidera.

[@welmacoco]

lol chidera am not yet married so i would stop any advice, howeverrrrrrr i loved this video and learnt something new 😁congrats on your award too hon ❤️

[@carolcarol1916]

Congratulations Chidera.

[@onyi__]

Yesss please more videos😍you do so well- God is your strength🥰

[@onyi__]

And the ending part is the highlight for me😂😂❤️

[@VibnwithGoldie]

Congratulations!! 🎊

[@itiswhatitis01]

😂😂😂I enjoyed the video and you look so pretty 😍😍

[@ambalioluwaseun5399]

Lovely. What book was that you read, Chidera? Sounds great and I'd like to have a look. Cheers!

[@hirsechamun]

Hi chidera Congratulations on your award🎉 Cheers to many more blissful years with your spouse. please what's the tittle of the book you mentioned that says, you have to be more committed to the instruction not the person? 🙏 thanks for the video.

[@thrillthings]

Chidera , which city are you located in England ?

[@shadeoladoja3719]

Hahaha....I have been married for 11yrs. Then when I first got married, I always look forward to quarrelling with my husband because it's an opportunity for me to pack my load and go straight to my sister's house, where I see as home. I always make sure the fight will be on weekends hehehehe. I have been enjoying fighting and not staying in the house all weekends. My daughter stopped the rubbish for me. A small girl of 2yrs then. She would start dragging me and crying😂, mummy let's go home, I want to see my daddy. It was then I realized my Sister's house wasn't my home😭. I had to stop the childish play and faced reality.

[@ukanwaikechukwu9768]

I love your videos ❤️🥰, please which city do you live?

[@ajayigift41]

Congratulations to you 🎉🎉🎉👍🌹💙💙

[@Preciousvlogmix]

Awwwnnnn 😍

[@jenniferumejiuba750]

I know nothing about marriage ooo but Chi where do you stay in London, we could hangout 🙃

[@iyanu5602]

The film is sending me. 😂

[@ijeomai3746]

YES!!!! Love is NOT enough!!! I told my kids that I would physicially assault a child who tells me they are getting married because they love him or her!!! NOOO!!! And I don;t mean to marry someone you don't love!!

[@ChideraPeters]

lol 😂 I actually get you

[@iyanu5602]

You're preaching. 😂

[@jamesemmanuel9333]

Congrats 🎊

[@fedousafiriyie4589]

Congratulations sis

[@theblestan]

Hi Please how did you apply for UK dependent visa?

[@phoebearyeetey1790]

Hi Chidera, love your videos, congratulations again, you work hard and you deserve it. I am also in the UK if you wanna be friends😄. I am from Ghana

[@ladyjacy4933]

Omor you are real for a ride truly, if you don't know how to forgive your spouse. You are right

[@ijayokey]

So hubby just walked in.

[@stephanieakut4996]

Lol 😂 Chidera what’s that Nollywood music in the intro biko ?

[@anthonia8743]

Hi Chidera, do you have any volunteer openings for the CP community?

[@Jaay2022]

First! Amazing intro

[@ChideraPeters]

Thanks for showing up beautiful Jamila ♥️

[@justinawhyte373]

Abeg ooo, married people should comment below make I prepare

[@ChideraPeters]

lol I know right, can’t see their comments yet 😒

[@Ezinneukachi]

Congratulations on the award

[@iyanu5602]

Congratulations on winning your award! 🙌🏾🥳