Marriage vs Being Single - Feeling Safe As A Woman Alone Over 60

[@beezneez2056]

A bird sitting on a tree Is never afraid of the branch breaking Because her trust is not on the branch But on her own wings

[@joannanderson3076]

I love this!!!❤

[@LittlePoet]

oh my....this is so beautiful and you said in a few lines what I took a 20 minut video to try to say...thank you so much..I will cherish this!

[@beezneez2056]

@@LittlePoet I cannot take credit for this. I found it several years ago during a time that I really needed it. I don’t know who wrote it. What beautiful words - I’m glad they resonated with you as well 🥰

[@vedafranklin7816]

Wow that’s profound … thank you beezneez2056❤

[@sovereign8043]

I feel safe when I am alone. Recently divorced after 22 years. The torment was great. I am tired...but I am safe now.

[@dotsonms]

I'm 52, needing to feel safe kept me in bad toxic relationships for half my life. I now live alone and feel safe, learned to love myself and knowing God is my protector and that's all I need. I was also married 3 times and never felt so alone in those relationships.

[@naturelover-f6h]

You and I have very similar stories and age. Thanks for sharing your story/encouragement

[@dotsonms]

@@naturelover-f6h much love ❤️

[@lindafrazier8092]

Bravo I salute your courage ... to step into your new life!

[@johnventrella3403]

Thank your sharing your life experiences and lessons learned. Afraid and wanting to be rescued, never trusting in ourselves 😢. Following destiny's path and hoping it all works out. Thank you for your most powerful video ever. You are loved..❤

[@virginia80139]

💯 Same experiences!

[@JT-lq8et]

I'm 77 and I feel safe because I started years ago keeping a monthly expense sheet. Nothing fancy, just a written paper. I save some money in my savings account every month...even if it's just a little. Security is important to me. I am grateful for all I have and that I am part of this LittlePoet group. Love you all!

[@LittlePoet]

You are 77? You look 37! Girl!!!!!!!! Can we talk!!!? xxooo

[@Christine-kq9ok]

🎵 Seventy-Seven, Sunset Strip! 🎵 [click - click] Remember that theme song from the TV series with that cutie pie Edd Byrnes? That could be our happy birthday song this year. It's still a wild ride, isn't it, JT?

[@marilynmontgomery4579]

Yes. I thought the same thing! What is your secret?

[@jackiemartin295]

💕

[@debbiesday8270]

I'm 64, broke, and divorcing the man I've been married to for forty six years. He left me out of the blue and left me financially ruined. So I don't feel safe, but I'm trying to learn at this late date that only I can make myself feel safe and move forward. One thing that helps is seeing life as an adventure instead of a catastrophe. It's not easy, but it's just the way life is. God is walking me home and I have that assurance to help me.❤

[@peopleplacesandperspective5564]

Sending good thoughts to you. How are you doing today?

[@flossyflue4305]

It’s a while since you wrote that reply to Susan, I really hope things have got better for you. I had circumstances that I was made to be alone also as the decision was made for me. These chapters in life are so varied but the same for all of us, that’s what I tell myself anyway. Hope you’re okay.

[@mkbrown3902]

My mom died last week and my precious 95 year old dad is ready to go. I sat up with him for several night holding his hand, my mom and dad were married 75 years old, I didnt want him to wake up and be afraid. He woke up and said "are you still married" and I said no. My dear dad said "I'm worried about you". I told him not to worry because I have a dog. He smiled. I feel safe. Hugs to Desi ❤

[@susannovak8263]

I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤

[@sandrawright8109]

Your story made me cry. I love your dad...he sounded like my dad who I lost two years ago at 92.best wishesx

[@lisabyl3240]

My Condolences to you on the loss of your Mom❤. It's so hard to lose our parents. Cherish the time with your Dad. I miss mine . He's a good Dad still looking out for you when he just lost his wife. He thought of you before himself. ❤ Jesus said , " Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted", Matthew 5:4

[@reneemoriconi7003]

I am 59, i live alone in my little nest since my husband passed away two yrs. ago. I am not afraid. I keep my doors locked all of the time. I stay aware of my surroundings. I mean if some one really wanted to break in, they could, but i am not going to anticipate that every day of my life. I put my trust in the Lord.

[@JenFlutterby]

Wise words! Jesus brings more peace than anything of this world. 🥰

[@reneemoriconi7003]

@@JenFlutterby Amen!

[@sharon6416]

I’m 68 and have been single for 31 yrs. I felt unsafe while being married to a verbally abusive man. The day he left is when i felt safe. Marriage guarantees nothing. I never regretted getting divorced. I’ve been living alone for a long time and love it. Being fearful in your own home is a feeling I would never wish on any women. I changed that for me and my 2 children. We made our way didn’t we Susan. So can any other woman.

[@annahayes1007]

Even feeling "safe" from emotional abuse is so important.

[@Corrans]

Oh God I can relate...I too felt unsafe in my home until I left. It's terrible.

[@susanmarie2231]

I am 69 and divorced 35 years ago. Never remarried. No regrets.

[@patriciapisano2950]

I was an orphan and had nine homes and two institutions-the main thing was I was given religion- I knew Jesus loved me and it got me through my whole life- I’m 83 and have a wonderful family-❤❤❤❤

[@parler8698]

❤

[@joycewirth3022]

Dear girlfriend, you informed us that you were 57 as your protective walls crumbled around you, scared and uncertain of what to do. I was 52 when my husband passed, I too was the same as you. What pulled me through were my sons and my faith in the Lord. I had to continue to go to work, keep the daily routine in order, pay bills, cook, clean, yard work, etc; but I was strong and healthy, and I carried on. I just turned 80 years young, and I'm still doing everything by myself. My sons married, I have grandchildren, and I'm alone but I'm not scared. I pray every day to the Lord and he has given me the inner peace, strength, and the knowledge that I can do anything successfully because of my love for Him. My husband came to me in a dream, he held my hand and said to me "Everything will be all right". I woke up still feeling his hand in mine. Crying, I thanked him, and yes he was right, everything is all right. You too will be OK, love you and Desi. Peace😇🥰

[@texasmimi5566]

Wow, what a blessing to have your beloved husband return in a way that felt real! Was it really a dream? Or did it really happen, in a super-natural way, of course. If you still felt his hand...........some dreams that feel so real, maybe they really are "real". Only God knows for sure.

[@shirleygardiner3264]

I too am a Christian and never feel alone. The Holy Spirit is my constant companion...councillor...and comforter. I was widowed at 64...seven years ago... and after adjusting to my new life, I am very contented and feel safe. I so enjoy these visits I have with the ‘LittlePoet’. You have much wisdom to share and it feels like we are visiting across a table...with a cup of tea. Thank you so much for being my ‘online’ friend. ❤

[@sammie4695]

I will always remember when I was in the hospital at 5 years old. It was a charity hospital because my parents couldn't afford medical insurance, not having much money & 4 kids to raise back in 1951. I was unable to walk & they were testing me for Polio. (What I turned out having is complications from German measles) This nurse they assigned to me was very mean. My Dad had brought me a toy when he visited me in the hospital. One day I was lying in bed playing with it & I, a little 5 yr. old girl, dropped my toy on the floor. I couldn't get up& get it because I couldn't walk. That mean nurse came in & saw my toy on the floor & I thought she was going to pick it up for me and she just looked at me real mean & right in front of me threw it in the trash can by my bed. Later, my Dad came to visit me & I told him what she did. Naturally I didn't feel safe..To my surprise my Dad scooped me up out of that bed & was taking me out of that hospital He seemed so big & tall with my arms around his neck looking at that mean nurse following behind him yelling"you can't take her out of here & I was looking back at her smiling. That's the safest I ever felt in my whole life. Me being rescued by my hero, my Dad.

[@elizabethelliott3175]

My father was also my hero. I know what you mean.

[@aprilraine3845]

Wow I love this Story! Good for your Dad!

[@ritacarlson9522]

I was widowed 8 years ago...after 43 years of marriage I was alone and fear gripped me and made me want my life to end. Through these 8 years I have learned to save my retirement money...repair and replace my kitchen faucet and everything else that has required me to repair or replace it. Being sick and alone has taught me how strong I really am and now at 69 years of age I feel I have the mental strenght to move through the next years if my life...and be thankful that I'm still alive and have a chance of happiness in each new day. 😊

[@pattyallen5313]

Rita, Oh how your story mirrors mine !!! I am 68 and also lost my dear, sweet husband 8 years ago. I truly thought I would not survive being on my own but God made a way. A lady told me that now I would do things that I never could have imagined doing and boy was she right !!! Taking full care of the house, yard, cars and finances without him has been a miracle for me to handle but I should say God helped me handle. God Bless you, Rita. 😊

[@lorritucker6264]

Wow, Strong & powerful!! God Bless!

[@AyaSmith-rb2hp]

I can so relate! Thank you

[@kcampbell867]

You are simply amazing and give me so much hope! Thank you for sharing your story!

[@teresabarrett4706]

P

[@DKM905]

I am 76 and live alone and have since 1991. Yes I feel safe because of my faith, and I don’t feel alone and afraid. Thank you for this video people need to be encouraged they can feel safe even alone.

[@lindafrazier8092]

Life is so full of possibilities ❤

[@jules8910]

God is always watching and promises us safety, within.

[@lorrainedraper82]

Faith will do that for you . God bless you 🩷

[@terrilowe3530]

Yes, me too. I can look back and be in awe of how my God cared for me all these single years. And am so thankful for my kind grown children.

[@Patricia_Stewart337]

I lost my husband in 1993 I miss him But I don’t want to get with anyone new

[@wandaschacherbauer4583]

Your something else, you walk into an empty house and instantly make it a beautiful home.😊

[@grannyprepper1181]

I went through all those feelings in 2021 when my husband of 16 years wanted out of the marriage. It was on my 69th birthday. He was everything I wanted and needed in a husband…and I felt safe. When he left, I panicked. I was so afraid, how was I going to live without him. It took me 6 months or so before I told myself “you got this, you’ll be ok!” and I am.

[@ginnytalbert2524]

I am 53 and learning how to live alone again. In my marriage I was so lonely. Once I filed for divorce I started to feel free. Not having the income I had during the marriage makes me feel afraid and anxious. The good news is, I am making it on my own. I have only had one marriage and one is enough. I am better on my own with my furbabies, family and friends.

[@leahweinberger583]

Yes, the anxiety is ferocious but the peace? Oh it's so lovely. I was sitting calm today and looked at fall outside my window..so peaceful just to sit in my chair in my home and KNOW I was able to sit for hours, doing whatever I chose and Noone would upset that. Yes, the financiam anxiety is awful but so far, I feel like I definitely chose right. I'll get through this as well.

[@lorrainedraper82]

Fur babies are the best . I wish you love , blessings and happiness

[@Adventures_without_NickNamin]

❤

[@jeanieturner5183]

Susan I met my precious husband at 15 married him at 19 and had never lived alone. At 51 he passed away. The only reason I could make it all these 24 years without him.was knowing God is in control of my life. He is my rock and my safe place. I just look so forward to your wonderful calming videos.

[@texasmimi5566]

Yes, our time in this world is temporary. God IS in control of our lives, if we believe and trust in Him.

[@susanenglish3791]

You nailed it. Having a good husband isn't enough. The stronger you are, the less anxiety you feel. Thanks for the reminder.

[@tracythomas343]

I have never felt safe when I was in a marriage. In fact, I felt the least safe when I have been married. I also have been married 3 times. I will never live with or be married again. If I’m ever in a relationship we will each have our own place. I feel most safe when I control my own environment, when I don’t have to consult someone else about important decisions. I own my own house, I have saved for retirement and I will be fine. Now, in my 60’s as a single person, I’m the most safe I’ve ever been. Bless you Susan for bringing up this topic.

[@randomvintagefilm273]

I'm 56 and I'm single now. I like being single but I don't like living alone. I live with my older brother and it is nice to know somebody is there.

[@lindaparra6002]

Safe? Even as a nightclub singer for over 25 years in the top places in town, walking to my car after work I was never afraid. Now... I feel safe for a different reason. God says in His word that He didn't give me a spirit of fear But a spirit of love, of power, and of a sound mind. That's in 2 Timothy 1:7. I have now a totally different confidence that I walk in. It's pretty wild but God really takes care of us and provides for us. I wish you continued Blessings Susan.

[@JenFlutterby]

Indeed! ❤

[@Julie-si3hi]

I needed that reminder. Thank you x

[@texasmimi5566]

I am in awe of the many women of faith who are here and not afraid to speak of God and His love for his own.

[@delializarraga9638]

❤❤❤ He my savior and defender…my Lord Jesus the Christ is my Strength

[@lisabyl3240]

Amen❤ love that verse and have memorized it .

[@kathiebranton7528]

Honestly when I went through a divorce it was just me and my Boston terrier "Kramer". I loved that dog so very much. I called him my little man, LOL. Anyway,, whenever I felt fearful or anxious I would just pray God put your angels all around me and keep me from harm. I knew I had to trust God for my peace and my new life as a divorced woman after 20 years of marriage. But God was my protector and I leaned on Him. Now I have been remarried for 17 years and I almost lost my husband to cardia arrest. The hospital lost him 3 times but God brought him back to me and he is the love of my life. He cherishes me and respects me and the life we share is so beautiful. I am not saying he is perfect in every way, nor am I. But God gifted him to me and I certainly am so appreciative to Him for that. I wasn't looking to ever remarry again but God had a plan and He brought that plan into my life. So with or without a man,, let God be your help and your strength for all things and He will show up in ways you can only imagine. Love and hugs to all broken women.

[@lisabyl3240]

Amen❤

[@ruthdennisKnits]

I was married 4 times. My 4th husband was so protective, kind, caring and loving. Because he was so good to me I wasn’t lost when he died of lung cancer 2 years ago. His planning and work ethics caused us to be secure in daily living. We were married 25 years. I have mostly always felt safe and the one or 2 times I didn’t feel safe was before he and I married. The insecurity was due to a lack of $ for basic living. Things did work out, I realized that God would always help me. After I learned to trust God for safety I met and married the safest man I’ve ever known ( other than my father) . Thanks for sharing

[@texasmimi5566]

God IS there for those who believe and have faith in Him. I, too, am proof of that.

[@annewhitney8809]

That light wash denim makes you look like a teenager. Wow. What a complimentary colour for your complexion. Thanks for raising the issue of feeling safe.

[@cherlgolja5402]

“The Lord watches over you - the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm - he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.”

[@lisabyl3240]

Amen. Psalm 121:8, I have this last verse on a sign over my front door and speak it over my children as they leave my house.

[@janicefolks645]

I feel safer alone. No walking on eggshells, no blindside of emotion and physical pain. I am no longer angry with myself for letting myself trust the wrong people. You are right, FAITH. Faith in my Savior is my safety. With my God in my heart, I am ok with life. Life is a gift and I am thankful. Bad things do happen but my peace is with my God.

[@louises6729]

I’m in such a bad abusive marriage been hospitalised today I spoke about it to strangers at a flea market where I sell clothes. I’m praying for strength to leave as I don’t feel safe even sleeping next to him every single night, I’m praying for strength and peace ❤

[@elainerobertson7329]

Please try and get local help. Praying for your safety. God loves you!

[@peopleplacesandperspective5564]

How are you doing now? Sending good thoughts to you.

[@wmb7163]

Sending love your way. Please keep yourself safe. You can do this.

[@louises6729]

@@peopleplacesandperspective5564I’m still here

[@stellajohnson5301]

Please get help. My prayers are with you.

[@deezahm9143]

🍂Hi Susan and friends. This topic touched my heart. I went thru a grey divorce (after 35 years, his decision) five years ago and lost it all. I cry a lot, for no reason at all. In this apartment now, a state away from where I lived for 35 years, I feel the loneliness and insecurity. But I also remember sitting next to my ex watching tv all those years, and wondering how I could feel so lonely with him sitting next to me. I’m holding my faith close, and continue to pray for all women who may feel the same. And I cling forever to hope. 💗

[@maryriseling209]

God bless you❤

[@LittlePoet]

Oh I cried reading your words...I have felt so much like how you describe...the worst kind of lonely is when there is no hope for anything changing...at least now we are free and single and it's our choice who sits next to us...love to you! Susan & Desi

[@cocofreebird7337]

Please know that each day free of that man’s ignorance and oppression is a day of freedom to find happiness for yourself! I live with a narcissistic husband who is like your ex. He has no interest in anything I have to say or share. I am 72 and went out and got a childcare worker at the YMCA job just to be around the positive energy of children. It helps so much to interact with people who need me!❤

[@anndailey7321]

Feeling safe never happened in my 3 marriages. I had lived alone for years in between marriages, but I always felt safe, when I lost my home that I had lived in for 24 years, I was furious!!!! The last husband left me holding the bag on a home equityline of credit, and a personal loan. It was hard to make those payments. So here I was, alone and disabled, and I had to face this. So, I moved out of my home, and rented the cutest little house, and the rent was affordable, and life went on. Well, I needed to move back to my hometown to take care of my mom, who was beginning to fail. She was 95 and had lived alone for 35 years after my dad died. Well, mom went downhill fast, and died. So I was living alone out in the country. My closest neighbors are black Angus cows. I still feel safe. I know that as long as the Lord has a job for me to do, I will be here, and He will keep me safe. Susan, you are a weekly treat for me. I love you both. Blessings to you both!!!❤

[@dianehoffman969]

I am woman watch me roar. Alone with all my sisters, you go girls. Love to all

[@jeweledmirrorqueen]

I have never been married and at sixty one, I feel the loneliness of companionship at times but glad I never married. Like you, I’m so glad it’s just me and my dog and right now going thru cancer alone has made me even more stronger as a person. I have watched your videos and seen what you’ve gone through and think you are a beautiful person inside and out.

[@LittlePoet]

You are so kind, thank you so much. You have the biggest heart...xoo Much love, Susan and Desi

[@karendegraaf1146]

Prayers and hugs. You are very strong. God continue to bless you.

[@lisabyl3240]

Jesus heals and saves❤.

[@darlahkelley9800]

❤ At 68 I'm a Survivor 🎉I've lived alone for almost 20 years since my husband took his life in 2010. I had to prioritize my spending & live one day at a time being positive. I feel safe by not going out at 🌙 being aware of my surroundings. My main ♥️ squeeze is my Cat 🐈 Pepper 🌶 Hemmingway 🎉

[@jdoe981]

I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my husband 2 years ago to covid. Never thought I'd be alone at this point in my life at 59. He was so smart, and I'm ok, I also have a best friend, my Mainecoon Rosie 😼

[@lisahanseter6643]

Loved this subject, Susan…I call it security. I had the husband, homes, money, and could not understand why I did not feel secure. I have been single for 23 years, make a wonderful living as a designer…I am not wealthy but do okay. I have never felt more secure than I do now. I deeply know I can meet any challenge, I trust I will always find a way…and over the years, I have.

[@lindafrazier8092]

Amen

[@leahweinberger583]

This spoke to me. Thank you.

[@kennethamoore7068]

Safety for me is knowing God will never leave me or forsake me at 67. He is my protector psalms 91

[@lisabyl3240]

Amen❤

[@vickidriscoll1940]

My dad always made me feel safe. He passed when I was in my late sixties. When he sensed I was going through something, he’d give me a tight hug and say, “this too shall pass” and it always did.❤️….I live by those words

[@elizabethelliott3175]

My father said the very same to me! Many times:))

[@lisabyl3240]

Amen❤.your Dad was a wise man. Good Dad's are a Blessing from God and I Thank God I had a good Dad too

[@jenniferlee7167]

I really feel safer on my own than I ever did in an abusive marriage that I had for several years. I will never give up my peace of mind again--it is too much to consider. There are worse things than being alone and I have come to know that and to thank God for the safety he has given me. I work part-time and I pray that I will be safe until I get back home again, God is with me and he is with you too. Thank you for this video, Susan. It really affirmed how I feel. We have to be strong and move forward.

[@cherlgolja5402]

I’m 71 year old widow , I Feel Safe , because I have my FAITH 🙏🏻😇

[@juw17450]

My husband and I had been together since we were teenagers. He died 20+ years ago when he was 45 years old. I had a 15 year old son to continue raising and we had always just scraped by financially but when he died, a strange sense of calm about my financial situation came over me. To this day I can't explain that but since then, I've always felt like I'd have enough money to see me through. Now that I'm retired, I don't have much but I still feel like it should be enough for me and that's what makes me feel safe. 🙂

[@susannautterback6815]

My doggie does make me feel safe but also the faith I carry in my heart placed there by my Creator. Psalm 91 is one of the Psalms that is a comfort because God really does carry me through and has for a long time❤️

[@texasmimi5566]

Also, Psalm 71 is marked in the NIV Rainbow Study Bible "God's protection during old age". Fits all of us perfectly.🙏

[@susannautterback6815]

@@texasmimi5566 beautiful ❤️

[@bumblebee_ms]

I'm so proud of you and myself. I felt so low a year ago and now I'm finding my feet as a single adult woman. I feel safer now on my own than I ever did with toxic people (including family).

[@LauraFran55]

wow reading your comment give me some strength to accept the fact that I have no family and have not had any for the past 20 years, and to accept what is, because it could be worse.

[@bumblebee_ms]

@@LauraFran55 Thank you for your lovely words, It has taken me years to realise I love my own company, day by day. You are not alone, we are all with you.

[@judyconstantino7035]

I can sure tell you WHO feels safe…Desi!❤️

[@bumblebee_ms]

@@judyconstantino7035 Yeah, good point!

[@jackiewheaton4199]

When I divorced I learned to do take care of myself in many ways. That has given me confidence. It makes me proud of myself for being independent. You're right. No one can take care of you better than yourself.

[@michelesmith9750]

My husband left when I was 57, which actually was a blessing and it’s been 20 years. He gave me two wonderful things -my children and a divorce. Feeling safe, I’ve never really thought about it. I never felt safe as a child I had a single mother and then I married in my early 20s. did I feel safe when I was married? now that I think back on it - No. It’s only been in the last 20 years I have felt safe and that has been because of my faith and for that I am ever so grateful. Thank you Susan for your insight and for making me stop and think about feeling safe.

[@carolthrasher]

Bless you Susan, I married my high school sweetheart. I have been married for 55 yrs. I have been blessed by feeling safe all my life. Now at the age of 72, I wonder how our lives will end. Who will past away first, and who will be left to survive along for the first times in their lives. I love you and Desi. I am proud of you for accomplishing all you have, and how you love your family. May the Lord BLess you and Keep you.

[@JavaBlues47]

My mother's idea of being successful in life was marriage and babies. She pushed me into that ideal and I lived in fear that I'd not get there. My first marriage was at 17 and 18 months later I found myself pregnant and alone. He was verbally abusive. My Dad was the one that hired an attorney and told me to leave, he made me feel safe. I remarried 54 years ago to someone that adopted my daughter and together we had both birth children and adopted children with disabilities. What I had learned was in order to feel safe it had to come from within me and not any longer from my Dad. When I felt safe within myself I knew I could trust and remarry. My grandmother told me it was important to also have my own " pin money ", bless her heart, she was right. I love that you shared this part of our journey.

[@margiestephens7281]

Being with my Dad I always felt safe. I recently found an old autograph book I had in High School & as I turned the tattered, faded pages I found he had written “You were Daddy’s first love”. He passed away in 1992 & even today when his memory waifs through my conscious mind, I always cry crocodile tears…I wish I could rest in his big ole’ loving arms JUST ONE MORE TIME. I just stumbled across your channel & I am so glad I did. Margie from Alabama

[@texasmimi5566]

This brought me to tears. Your father's love.......what a blessing you had. Precious writing.

[@sueprice4082]

Yes, the unconditional love- my Dad too- irreplaceable. Sue from UK xxxx

[@magdaz4583]

Margie, do you know what does mean expression “ to cry crocodile tears?”..

[@booklover6963]

I feel so much safer unmarried my ex husband could be really scary sometimes. I knew I could handle the money and bills because I always did. He relied on me for everything. I'll never forget the doctors were taking me in for surgery and he says What will happen to me if something happens to you . He doesn't care about me only himself so yes I feel so much better alone. Take care you and Desi .

[@lenalootens5625]

Dear Susan, thank you for this great video! I was married twice, since 21 years I live alone. I feel more safe living alone than living in a marriage. Now I am in charge and I can now hear my inner voice. I can be myself and that is a safe place! Greetings from Belgium 💝🐴🌹

[@LittlePoet]

Hello Lena in Belgium! So happy for you to bere here!!!

[@AyaSmith-rb2hp]

Beautiful!

[@lenalootens5625]

And I am happy to follow you. Every sunday morning I am looking forward to your video! After my morning run, I have breakfast with you😊 Greetings from Belgium💝🐴🌹

[@nancyoliver8490]

Boy Susan this video really opened up my eyes! You are so right, we women are strong enough to get through so much… I DO feel safe because everything I’ve been through and have managed to pull through because I did have faith and I was strong enough to overcome. I’ve been alone for 21 years, my husband passed away and I raised three children on my own. That is a big deal! You my friend being so much joy to all of your visitors, your advice and just everyday adventures inspire so many. Thank you for giving so many of us hope.. ❤

[@sandrakulikowski6305]

I don’t feel safe as a single woman. I lost my husband and son through Covid. I was not allowed probably more in their passing. It was horrible what I had to go through alone. I love seeing your videos and brings me comfort to see you every week. I am alone and I don’t feel strong.

[@sandrakulikowski6305]

Thank you I love you and Desi. I wish you well. Your videos mean the world to me.

[@kimbers1238]

Oh honey I hate to hear what u have gone through. I'm so sorry for ur losses. I think it's understandable that u don't feel safe. Those losses can leave someone feeling so vulnerable. And even though u will always carry grief in time the vulnerable state that your in now will lesson. U will start to feel safe again. I'll be praying for u.

[@MariaAU]

I’m so very sorry for your losses. I will pray that you are given strength to carry on. Take care.❤

[@heidipurcell7606]

As a hairstylist for more than 35+ years,I speak to so many women. We all have so much strength, and love to give. We also struggle and often feel overworked, under appreciated and depleted. As women we tend to give ourselves away. I have found we need to give to ourselves as much as we give to others. It’s ok to have quiet time, it’s ok to take care of our health, our heart and our emotions. We need to lift ourselves and each other up, because we all are just walking each other home. Susan thank you for sharing your struggles and joys with us, you are a beautiful inspiration as we all navigate this journey home!

[@Christine-kq9ok]

You hairstylist ladies are the real, true therapists! We love that you listen to us and engage back in a conversation.

[@janisferrante3739]

I know what you went through.. My adulterous husband just told me that he didn't want to be married to me anymore. He left me with two of our five children still at home. I had no job, a $2000 mortgage and he took me off all the bank accounts and credit cards. I had no money. God bless my family for stepping in and helping us out. But I lived through it. That was 20 years ago. Although I am now a better person for going through that agony, my faith in God got me through it. I have forgiven my ex but the pain will never go away. We were married for 37 years.

[@trishkelly1721]

I know your pain and I’m so sorry he did that to you! You will get through it and be better off, I promise. 🙏

[@sherrycortese5856]

Maybe I've never felt safe. Possibly before my father died when I was 6, but I really don't recall. I've been a widow for 21 months & I feel a lot of things. But not safe. I was married for 46 years & didn't feel safe. I'll need to ponder this.

[@lea-annesaich5303]

At 52 I bought my own very first car. I lay awake at night terrified about the purchase and if I could afford it, what if I missed a payment… then suddenly I thought I simply do not have faith and trust in myself. That’s what was holding me back. I bought my beautiful new car and love every minute driving her. And the sense of pride in myself every time I see her it’s amazing. She is the symbol of trusting myself ❤

[@dianemick8915]

Oh my, this all hit me. I have been married twice and I felt no safer then than now. In fact, I feel safer. I'm only responsible for my actions and am not trying to cover up the actions of my exes. My little dog is a wonderful companion! I know I can do whatever is necessary and am usually quite happy doing it!

[@LittlePoet]

WOW! Isn't it amazing....we feel safer alone!!!

[@rickrader5004]

I love this video Susan. I am 64 with a grown son and married for the second time. You are so on point. A man cannot make you feel safe. As we age we learn that we can handle anything that is thrown at us no matter how difficult it is and come out on the other side. My first husband taught me to feel unsafe. I was a young bride and he put his hands around my neck because he was angry that I fixed a surprise dinner for him and my friends who were coming over to get his advice on accounting. He did not want me to spend the money. Shortly thereafter, I had to leave knowing that I could never trust someone that would do such a thing. The marriage was over. Growing up, my parents did a good job making me feel safe. As you mention, it comes from within. Thank you for such an insightful video. Dawn

[@AyaSmith-rb2hp]

Smart you for getting away from that. It would have only become much worse.

[@candancewilliams2520]

I feel safe and I am safe in the arms of JESUS, He is my all in all, HE has promised to never leave me to never let me walk alone thats HIS great promise to everyone who believes in HIM and has accepted Jesus as our loving savior I am a recent widow so I have lost a great man, my husband who was also my best friend, and nights are especially lonely, but i just listen to HIS word in the wonderful love letter the HOLY BIBLE that He left for us all to read and study and to grow closer to our heavenly Father each day. Seek Jesus He is only a whisper away, He loves you and most of all HE will never, never leave you. May GOD richly bless and keep you in His awesome care.

[@teresabolen6034]

I had to really think about this. I watch the news.... I'm prepared and I even have sound money. Yes, I feel safe in my apartment and more importantly, I believe that God's hand protects me because I have faith.

[@CH-vf5ys]

I think I’ve always felt safe because I had a secure career (teaching), and pension. I always knew I could take care of myself and my kids, if I found myself on my own. My mom was a strong, independent woman, even though she never worked outside the home, and she passed that spirit on to her daughters. We all need to instill that confidence in the young women in our lives.

[@barbarafunk8767]

I love hearing your story. I have not really thought about what makes me feel safe, but knowing that I have God in your life is probably the thing that makes me feel safer. I have been married 50 years this year to my husband and he is a wonderful husband to me. I pray that you will feel safe and have a wonderful life. ❤

[@dianalaycock8003]

Susan, so many times when you are sharing your stories I find myself being pulled in and reflecting on similar situations that I’ve hid in my memory. Thank you for the opportunity to reflect and move on. You are such a treasure. ❤

[@cuddlemuff6632]

I'm always so happy to see a new video on Saturday night, Susan. Every week you come up with relevant topics to share.

[@traciyoung8678]

I loved this video. Thank you Susan. I think right now in my life, my faith is making me feel safe. I agree that no man will make me feel truly safe. I've learned to lean on myself and my faith in God that he will never leave me.

[@lindafrazier8092]

Yes!!!

[@vanessaherron5203]

Hello my friend, my situation is a bit differant, even though I lost my husband that was everything to me in every way, emotionally, mentally, and financially, and I relied on him and he on me. I guess the reason why I haven’t felt unsafe as I am alone now, is I live each day with his words of wisdom. He was a very wise man and I learned so much from him. After so many years with him I know exactly what he would tell me if I felt unsafe in anyway. Just drawing on his words when I need him is a blessing and makes me feel safe. I know he would be so proud as I am proud of how I have been able to keep moving and living life🦋

[@JenFlutterby]

Your words are so sweet when sharing about your late husband. You should be so proud of yourself for being so strong. I imagine the journey has not always been easy, but I think he likely led by example so you would know what to do if you had to live without him. My husband has also done the same for me (we have a large age gap). He encourages me to be strong, resilient and confident in who I am. To be able to stand up for myself and not allow others to take advantage of me or my kind nature. My faith in Jesus keeps me full of peace for life ahead. Keep your great outlook for life! It’s not something you often see in others who are in your similar situation. It’s encouraging others who may be in your shoes that they can have a different outlook than despair. ❤

[@barbarawaite5395]

I was never afraid to be alone, in fact I need alone time for my own sanity. I was pretty darn fearless for most of my life... until I became legally blind. I've still been fine to spend a few days here and there alone when my husband had to go out of town on occasion, but if something happened to him and it became permanent, I would have to make some hard choices. There are people out there who would see me as an easy target should I have anything they wanted for their own. What has helped is that I have a contingency plan should I find myself alone. I've already talked with my children and I have options. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst was something an eye surgeon told me years ago. I've lived by that motto ever since.

[@pamsmith7369]

I was married for nearly 40 years and I always felt safe having my husband there. Now that he died I feel more vulnerable because right after I moved into another house, I was burglarized. They took all my gold jewelry but didn’t trash the place. Only broke one lock on one window to get in. I got a security system and feel safer now. When I come home and lock up, alarm the house and get everything in order, I feel safe and content. I don’t let the possibility of someone coming at me or trying to break in let me feel unsafe. I tripped the alarm by accident a few years ago and the police were there in two minutes!

[@Liz_NewBeginings]

Hello I truly love your stories. I am (65), single and at times I feel unsafe. But, God gives me all I need to be at peace, and feel safe. Keeping myself busy with my crafts helps too.

[@mskulagal]

Susan, the last scene of you and Cooper sitting at the window sent me over the edge. What a beautiful way to end this video. Mandy from Tucson🌵

[@rhondabeaman1]

Oh my, this was a wonderful and helpful video! Thank you so much. So many of us need to hear this. (I was 10 years old when John Kennedy was assassinated and was watching TV with my family when Lee Harvey Oswald was gunned down. I started to cry. My father ask me what was wrong and I replied “Everybody’s getting shot.” He pulled me into his lap and told me everything would be OK and I believed him. Safest I ever felt.❤

[@annalake4376]

I'll be 59 and I have never been happier or felt safer. I have lived alone for over a decade,best decision ever!

[@lindachristie6060]

This was a very special video tonight with a wonderful message to all women. I too married before I gave myself a chance to pursue a life on my own. I thought at the time that I felt safe in the marriage but when the marriage fell apart, I realized my feeling safe was my imagination. I am alone and happier now because I am in control of what I do that will make me feel good about myself. Marriage is wonderful if you find that special person, I didn’t but it’s ok. Thank you for expressing these feelings so well to us. You are a special person. Love to you and Desi! ❤

[@janieb6236]

Hmm. You have your son and family close by. That's a huge gift.

[@cynthiahicks1909]

Growing up my mother was volatile and unpredictable- I'm in my 60's and to this day I will say to myself, "oh I LOVE being an adult." I moved out at 17 and sat on my bed in the big city that was an hour and a half from where I grew up- sighed and thought to myself.......wow, this is what happiness feels like....I felt safe.

[@maryjoan4128]

I am so happy you feel safe.. feeling safe for me is not having to walk on egg shells.. to be afraid...I am more concerned about identity theft etc..today.. but I am blessed to live in a safe community..as well......keep well

[@rrhines3151]

Hands poised over "home row" on my keyboard. . . feeling so much inside that words seem inadequate in context to your conversation with us about safety. . . eyes filled with tears by your ending. Your discovery of feeling safe as a woman invites us to seek out our own. Susan, your wisdom comes from your life. Sending a hug from New England.🤗

[@LittlePoet]

I am so glad you are here tonight....Iit's been too long since I was in New England!! Happy Weekend to you! Susan & Desi

[@Karen-c3d7i]

I put God first - God is the center. Through my faith in God I have survived divorce and lack of funds. Now at 76, I rent and live on social security and a tiny pension. I am not in control. God Alone is in control. God brings me Peace and Consolation.

[@dlh7167]

I am 63. I have physical issues that can make me feel very unsafe wondering how I can manage alone, if I let myself "go there". But I do somehow. My exhusband was meeting with my best friend. I made it through that. They were going to hit me with all of it when I got home from a hip replacement. I was severely anemic after surgery, I was grey. They held off because I was in such bad shape. But I made it. My faith keeps me strong and that is where my strength is. I managed to keep my home and I feel the most safe at home with my kitty Benny. I feel safe knowing I can survive on my own. My son helps. I can say hard times make it easy to appreciate the good.

[@trishkelly1721]

I’m sorry for your pain! Stay true to yourself and let karma do the rest.

[@katesmith5475]

I am in my third marriage. My first husband was too young and immature to be married. He told me he was leaving me do i moved to boston where my parents lived. My second husband was so abusive verbally, criticizing me constantly. I finally got the courage to leave with my 12 yr old daughter. I didnt marry again until my daughter was in college. My third husband is s wonderful man. I am so blessed. It's been 20 yrs snd i couldn't be happier. Do i feel safe ? Definitely!

[@sherrylippert7000]

I lost my hubby of 47 yrs he was never true but I was now he’s gone and I sold the house and found that I am strong and I can do all things by my self and I don’t need a man. My mom and dad always told me I was strong. Now I believe that is true . I live with my 2 cavaliers and 1 cat and I am truly happy.

[@pamoverbeek6579]

I have lived alone for 39 years, 15 years with children, the past 24 completely alone. I feel much safer alone than I ever did married. Yes, it took some time to become completely comfortable with my own company but once I did, I actually like being alone. i have never been afraid or uneasy alone. I am 70yo and fully expect to be alone for the rest of my life and I'm ok with that. Fear will stop you from moving forward so just do it afraid and that will take the fear out of whatever you are afraid of. Susan I admire you and your independence, it takes work but it is so worth it. Woman are so much stronger than we get credit for! Have a great week!

[@mondayschild229]

When I was about 17 I was in some teenage troubles. My parents gave me some tough love, and right then I realized that it was up to me to look out for myself in this life. From then on I depended on only me for security and safety. Men come and go, but I am always with me and always able (so far at 85 years old) to work out the problems. Decide...take action...adjust things. Learn from mistakes, and know that, yes, safety comes from within.

[@georgemoore-wg5jj]

Hi Jeanette🌹🌹 How are you doing?

[@kathysutter6968]

They say living in the past causes depression and living in the future cause's anxiety. So, I think I'll live in the present and enjoy the view. I think it all is within us our safety, our peace our joy. So look within.💗

[@texasmimi5566]

Best comment on here!

[@marinajohns913]

I like the way you think!

[@Tltawhr1]

Yesterday would have been my moms 80th birthday. When i lost her, i also went through a divorce. Pen to paper this morning i wrote about her and how unsafe i felt loosing her 9 years ago. I still feel unsafe and in my journal i wrote "security comes from within". Then i find your video. It was divine and i was meant to see it. I feel it was my mom's way of reassuring me and wrapping a blanket around me. Thank you for making this content. It is homey and relaxing- just like mom. ❤

[@lose999]

Once again I'm weeping...you touch my heart so profoundly each week. Tonight's video was extra special. Thank you. I just love that Desi looks like he feels safe with you...

[@LittlePoet]

You are so wonderful and kind, thank you so much. You have the biggest heart...xoo Much love, Susan and Desi

[@jenramirez5329]

I am 52, I have a relationship with our Lord and Savior! He healed my broken heart after failed relationships/marriage BUT I am redeemed, in peace, single and practicing celibacy and I feel so, so good because I know God is Good. All those trials throughout my life were lessons and experiences to get me where I am now. I don’t feel alone because God is with me everyday and He is my best friend! I’m at a place in my life I’ve never been. Now I’m enjoying myself, my young adult children and my precious grandchildren! Thank you Jesus! Beyond Grateful everyday! Life is really what we decide to make of it ever single day! ♥️

[@LilVanleuven]

Oh Sweet Susan, hearing you this morning talking about feeling safe, i had such anxiety after my divorce when my children were little, worried about everything, it was so scary...Now im older happily married, for 20 yrs ...looking back how i worried about everything....But i did get through it all...my faith & prayer helped so very much....But the biggest part of that was my Parents, always there to listen , give words of encouragement too..i never took any if that for granted...They were so right, one day i will love again, Everything will turn out for the best, just take care of yourself, be there for your children....And those words made me feel Safe... Dearest Mom & Dad thankyou for giving me those words of comfort that i have remembered from all those yrs.ago....❤❤ And to you Susan, you shared those memories of yourself going through so many struggles throughout the yrs.....Thankyou & God Bless you...❤

[@naturelover-f6h]

I am 53 and getting out of a 28 yr marriage to a man who emotionally abuses and very controlling. The financial abuse is what made me feel the most unsafe and now I am renting a townhouse and on my own for the first time ever. I am at peace.

[@LadyBug1967]

A commenter pointed out that Desi was asleep behind you and he looks so peaceful and so safe and then I suddenly noticed him lying there. AND I could see what they meant. I'm sure when you talk, he hears your voice and that makes him feel very, very safe. I also noticed the paintings behind you and I would love if you could do a tour of your home and maybe a close up of the various paintings and the history behind them and why you bought them because I've NEVER seen a house look more like a home then your new place. I read a lot of the comments and I do think faith is an important thing and maybe you did not need it because you didn't mention it but I truly think that helps a lot of people to feel safe. I also think that one's community is important and although you loved Grand Rapids, you moved to a city where your son is and I gather you have more children than one so maybe there's another son some place and there's grandchildren --some that appear to be grown and some that are young. I can't help but think that somewhere deep inside, even if you don't think about it consciously, their physical closeness would make you feel very safe, not that you expect them-- especially the grandchildren-- to do anything in particular if you are in a crisis but just the fact that they are there and you know they are there in your ❤️, I would think would create an aura of safety around you. I say that in particular because I did NOT have children so I do NOT have that. Most of my family is dead or --because we were a military family-- as a child I didn't get to know my cousins; they are dispersed everywhere and there's no way to really find where they are so I am virtually on my own and yet, I've NEVER felt unsafe. I'm not sure why; but that's how it is. In all events, I think this was a very special video for many people and I am very glad that you did it. It also helped you to reflect and allowed you the emotional space to mention your mom. Even from the beginning of the video, I was thinking-- BUT where is your mother who raised you as a single mother? WHAT an inspiration she must have been. AND then, sure enough, at the end you tied the ribbon on the💝 present: it was your mom who has inspired you😊 THE American culture is basically a Protestant culture and extremely patrilineal and I think it is so wonderful when women realize that their mom is probably the one that taught them how to be strong and how to be safe and that the fact that we have been denied our matrilineal lineage due to our culture, we must reverse that legacy, at least in our hearts❤️🧡💛💚💔❤️‍🩹💙💜🤎🤍 Susan, could you also share that song you mentioned. IT sounds so beautiful. Maybe on your next video, you could do a tour of your paintings & end by singing that beautiful song to us and for us? THANK YOU 💌

[@marshawilson4175]

Susan….I’ve been married 3 times as well, once divorced after 22 years and twice widowed….I’m 74 now and bought my own place to live 4 years ago after losing my house shortly after my 3rd husband passed….being safe never occurred to me, I just put one foot in front of the other and did what I needed to do to take care of myself and my little dogs (who have both passed on)……your video was touching…..as an older woman I grew up in a time where marriage was important for being safe, but I wasn’t ready for a husband who cheated ….. I grew up fast and knew, to be safe, I’d have to be free first…..my life’s been difficult at times but I’m happy and proud that I am where I am now and it was my strength and perseverance that got me here…..thank you for your videos….keep up the good work…..give hugs to sweet Desi …… blessings. ❤

[@trishobrien8184]

I had a scary experience while having a surgical procedure in a hospital that was short staffed. I'm thankful that my husband was there to help me get through it and I've since been afraid of what I would do without him. He stayed by my side and literally directed the staff to help me when they didn't seem to know what to do. I worry about if he passes before me, who will I have there. I plan to move closer to my daughter and grandchildren and hope that they will be there for me if need be. I think we all need people who will be there for us when we can't be there for ourselves. I wish I could have been there more for my Mom and have alot of guilt about that. I lived across the country and couldn't be there when she needed me. I think also that it's important to have a circle of friends who care for each other.

[@LittlePoet]

You are so kind...thank you so much for being here and have a great new week! With Love, Susan & Desi

[@Kendrach]

Many people don't have that.

[@janice3309]

What a beautiful video!! When I was young I hated thunderstorms and my earliest memory of pulling my covers up and feeling secure and safe in bed. How simple it was back then...now feeling safe isn't always that easy. But I love you said, have FAITH because it always works out. Thank you for that gentle reminder.

[@LittlePoet]

Oh thank you so much for your kind words!!!

[@marypucci6814]

I guess I was safe but I felt afraid that I would need to be married to be able to survive. I had fear more than anything. I have been alone for 18 years and I have survived. I feel safe.

[@mallorygraf8574]

Honestly , feeling safe to me was paying off our mortgage. I kept telling my jusband we had to pay it off. Now at least it is ours but of course we still have property taxes. But it was just something in me that didn't feel safe until we paid it off. I really can't explain it.

[@Sandi-w9d]

Being in church, praying, reading God's Word, especially Psalms 23, which I have memorized make me feel safe as I am sheltered in the arms of God.

[@lanalowery4267]

Love every Saturday waiting on your videos,thanks for this one tonight.

[@nicolekalicazk5839]

Hi Susie.I feel safe.I'm almost 72,My partner of 20 yrs left me three years ago.I gave him half of everything.I moved away to my home town ,I bought a small new home by myself and have my own mortgage ,I had a sweet little Yorkie but she died in August.Hugs Desi

[@lindaparra6002]

Oh my, I'm only in the first minute of your video and I love the music and your creativity! It's the way you put dried fallen leaves with people standing in the snow and water running at times.

[@judymiller4960]

I am recently divorced. I needed to buy a new car. I worried and felt unsafe, but I decided the cars from which I would choose. I asked good friends and trusted acquaintances for recommendations. I read online about the practices of a company that sells used cars and I thought they sounded reasonable. My daughter and I went together. We selected 4 cars. After looking at the car fax report we deleted two of them. Then we test-drove two cars. The first car that I drove is the one I ultimately chose. It s a wonderful car. The whole experience gave me comfort and joy. I feel safe.

[@Lambee303]

Safety doesn't come from the outside - it comes from confidence and self-love. When you make YOU the priority then you are safe, because you are responsible to YOU! I've been alone, by choice, for 8 years now. My dad gave me the feeling of safety and taught me to be responsible for myself - financially and emotionally. I have a small group of friends - a great extended community and I have a career that doesn't know any bounds of age or physically ability. I can always make money and not be dependent on anyone if I don't need to. Yes, a good handyman can be paid for, lol! Love your videos!

[@lindafrazier8092]

Well said❤

[@susansagun7077]

Susan, I’m so impressed with the depth of your video today. Utterly real, raw and relatable in all the ways we women share such experiences. I’m 66, divorced once, widowed once 5 years ago and now dating. I’m honored to be in your company. Very well done!

[@georgemoore-wg5jj]

Hi Susan🌹🌹 How are you doing?

[@gailbreen279]

You always seem to address subjects that are dragging me down at the moment. I’m 71 and semi retired and every day feels terrifying. You have given me the boost I needed. Thank you Susan.

[@tammeyfitzgerald1432]

Single 13 yrs initially after my divorce I did not feel safe. For the last 5 yrs I feel safe. Because I made it Safe! 🌻

[@jacquelinedonoghue2135]

So lovely to see mr. Cooper ..what a beautiful dog he was. Now you have the adorable Desi who looks so cute every week asleep in the background. Yes we all feel vulnerable and scared no matter what our position is ….married, single in a relationship or out of one. The world is an intimidating place, but if we try to keep positive and see the beauty then maybe the journey will be easier. God bless Susan and Desi. Lovely video. 🌸