What I Wish I Knew Before Transitioning (mtf)

[@miriamn1075]

I had the complete reverse experience. I had seen so many women in my support group with extreme mood swings, almost 0 breast growth, no facial feminization etc. I had really mixed feelings when I took my first pill. What I got until now is just incredible: after a lttle bit more then 6 months I fill a whole A cup (and they are still growing!), my face has changed so much that some friends didn't recognize me on first sight and everything else is getting rounder and rounder. Yes, there where mood swings the first few weeks when your inner chemistry changes and learning to deal with that narrower emotional deadband is also something. But apart from that: I expected the worst and got the best I'd say. I'm grateful to destiny that everything turned out that well so far.

[@Moonlight-bj9pk]

What did u use? Injection or pills ?

[@Gambol_25]

​@@Moonlight-bj9pkthey said "pills" so I guess it's pills ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[@fawn8347]

One year on HRT here! Do I feel like a mess sometimes? Oh yeah. Would I trade it for anything? Not a chance. Honestly the biggest change I never saw coming (and ironically the best part of the transition) was how much easier it was to just cry it out when overwhelmed or distressed.

[@iluvrxses764]

So my voice is feminine, if I take testosterone blockers and estrogen, would my voice stay the same or would it still get deep over time?

[@fawn8347]

@@iluvrxses764 Testosterone affects the vocal cords. That's why a deeper voice is a part of male puberty. As such, testosterone blockers should work, but if you're at the age where puberty is still waiting they'd be more likely to assign puberty blockers to delay the process. Trans men get it a bit easier in that respect, since HRT will lower their voice.

[@iluvrxses764]

@@fawn8347 omg thank you so much because my voice is how I want it or higher and I’m still going through puberty so I’m hoping my voice stays really high

[@jeffhe2]

Your power is in your authenticity and your courage is your honesty. Just a "normal" straight guy here. Thanks for being a role model for these values.

[@nicolemaggard783]

I wish I knew about the fetishists before I transitioned. When I started dating, all the men that were into me, were only there to fetishize me. It felt really isolating, cause it didn't feel like I could be legitimately loved while being trans. I know I sound like I'm on some kind of high horse saying that my prince charming should be this and not this, but I just want to be with somebody who will love me for who I am, not for what genitals, or chromosomes, etc. that I have, because the novelty of those things will wear.

[@lilmisspettiieee]

I agree 💯 hundred percent agree with you it’s very true and discouraging when you realize that a lot of men just fetishize you and then there’s others who call you a catfish for not being a real woman in their eyes. I’ve gotten to a point where I just don’t let me be in Transgender determine who I’m going to date or who I’m going to talk to I’m just living my life the best way that I see fit.

[@scarleyscattering]

I made the same experiences, at this point I believe that I’m just destined to stay alone forever and that’s why I stopped dating. A lot of guys are sometimes confess me their love but I knew they would’ve a problem with me being trans (since my surrounding is pretty transphobic and homophobic). It’s really hard.

[@rogerinhocudesapo1208]

@@scarleyscattering Look, one day you'll find someone. Okay, men care about sex indeed, nonetheless there will someone who doesn't care about this. Just be urself and someday you'll find the person ur looking for. I wish all the best for you!

[@stitchedfantasy4137]

yessss bby, u beautiful, and amazing. there’s no high horse. you deserve the love you’ve always dreamed of, and more. 💗

[@ursulahutere3566]

The real problem is with the bf's family and friends. Many can not accept his gf being trans. I settled for dating-lite , although I am very passing.

[@Cebollaverde]

This felt like mom sitting me down giving me a lecture on how rough puberty is gonna be

[@mayaross2375]

because it is

[@Joshua-qn3xj]

Yeah but she is good at explaining it im quite proud that she can XD

[@Joshua-qn3xj]

Very motherly XD

[@Keerasmatic]

Mathilda, I wanna start off by saying thank you. You're a big reason why I these past few months finally started accepting my truth. For the longest time I've been hiding who I was and I tried to tell myself that there wasn't anything wrong. I understand your number 4 completely. Every relationship I've had so far as a boy have felt wrong cuz I deep down felt that I was hiding something and so my connection with the other person didn't feel genuine and it made me question everything everytime. Now however I am finally gonna look up someone to talk to so I can begin my journey and hopefully get the help I need to become the person I was meant to be. THANK YOU!

[@konstantinos72ful]

ONE OF YOUR BEST VIDEOS MATHILDA!!! Please do not stop moving your hands, do not stop being your self...no matter what you are doing it is feminine, because you are a woman and real women do not afraid doing things!!! Of course we 'll continue taking hormones for the rest of our lives . this is not so bad and we are not THE ONLY ONES...for examle, there are people who are taking an hormone called insuline from their childhood, in order to consume glucose, in order to stay alive (Diabetes I)...!

[@jeanxu4184]

I relate so much with you not wanting to date before transitioning because if someone likes me back, they only like me because they see the “boy” me. But the “boy” me is not really me.

[@edwardluca6713]

i know Im randomly asking but does any of you know a trick to get back into an Instagram account?? I stupidly lost my password. I would appreciate any tips you can give me.

[@nathanielbode4329]

@Edward Luca Instablaster :)

[@edwardluca6713]

@Nathaniel Bode i really appreciate your reply. I got to the site on google and I'm trying it out atm. Looks like it's gonna take quite some time so I will reply here later with my results.

[@edwardluca6713]

@Nathaniel Bode It worked and I actually got access to my account again. I am so happy! Thanks so much, you really help me out !

[@nathanielbode4329]

@Edward Luca Happy to help =)

[@BastienWolf]

I'm just beginning my transition. rather slowly but this helps a lot, I relate to a lot of your experiences so much.

[@lukenader]

Me too I'm trying to get ready for estrogen

[@LadyJadeGaming.]

I just finished my transition and i’m agree with what she said. 🙃

[@sallylv2711]

You trans girls aren't biologically male, not every male has XY chromosomes and not every female has XX chromosomes, there are Swyer women with XY chromosomes and Morris men with XX chromosomes, they determinate your sex but that doesn't mean that every person with XY chromosomes are men and viceversa, you GIRLS were born with a female brain structure and that defines WHO you are, keep that in mind

[@xDarkforce3986x]

I’m struggling to start my own, this really helped...

[@vcanadian2696]

I want to begin my transition but I feel unprepared for it and fear what my friends and family with judge me

[@allyhouser1495]

I'm very early into my transition and I think the word that best describes my transition so far is "uncertainty". I think that's what you were referring to for yourself in your early stages as well. Uncertainty about how the changes to my face and other physical bodily changes are going to continue to evolve. Uncertainty about seeing this new "vessel" blossoming and whether or not I'll ever really be able to be happy with it. Not happy with changing, but how well I perceive the changes in relation to how I wish to change. Uncertainty about how and when to let my natural femininity present itself. I've started sooo late, so I've got 47 years of "learned" masculinity to "unlearn" and I have to finally learn how to be the feminine person that I naturally am. That's so damn ironic if you really think about it. Great video...very informative...very relatable...very helpful. For me personally, this is the most helpful and relatable video of yours so far. Thanks for again "baring" yourself for our benefit. ♥️🌱🌷🌹♀️♥️

❤️❤️❤️

[@ExvangelicalJess]

Ally Houser I can relate to you. I have 49 years of masculinity to unlearn in order to be my most authentic self. I’m 58 and knew when I was 9 that I was a girl. I would love to see some videos on how to unlearn these things I have had forced upon me for years. It’s tough to undo 58 years of brainwashing.

[@allyhouser1495]

@@ExvangelicalJess best wishes being the best YOU that you can.

[@ExvangelicalJess]

Thanks @Ally Houser! Sorry this is late! I just saw your reply this evening.

[@TheTallOne890]

@@ExvangelicalJess im 15 transgender mtf and I feel really lucky to be able to start in a few months "though I have not told my mother"

[@Cazra-VaporwaveWitch]

Shit... The mantra "I wouldn't be the same person if I were born X" was really enlightening. I'm currently gender-questioning and I feel like that statement will help me not to regret my journey thus far.

[@jelegance7415]

Amazing how honest, humble and sensitive this video is. Congrats how relatable you are. Being a great human being. So awesome. Thanks

[@DeeHuntress610]

You just described my whole life as of now girl. I'm almost 6 months into HRT and I feel exactly how you described in your video about everything! Love, friends, family, hormones. Seeing this makes me feel a little bit better since now I know this could be consider "normal procedure" but yeah. Thank you so much for this.

[@philiafoxx5320]

I want to thank you, Mathilda. I came out only three weeks ago and now I'm doing my first steps. Your Videos got important for me and I'm looking forward for everything, although I know much won't be like in the fairytale in my head. Your videos give me strength and some kind of bravery, because that's what you show and are. Thank you for being your true self and sharing that with us

[@BamaMophi]

I found your channel earlier this week and I instantly attached to you and your stories because I never had someone in my life who I could share my experiences with and could talk with me or to me about the trans experience. I have not started my hrt yet and I still have a lot of fears about telling people in my life about being trans. And your videos have been helping me work through some of my fears and contextualize some of what I’m feeling. This is the first video that’s made me cry because I never even realized myself that I wasn’t respecting my own identity as trans and that I was denying a part of myself because I wasn’t born female. Now, I’m gonna try to start loving the me I am and not the me I wish I was or that I wish I could have been. And I’m going to try to be more upfront with myself and with other people around me and try not to let my fear of rejection stop me from living as me. And I just want to say thank you so much for sharing your truth. And for being who you are

[@elsieparker8802]

This video is amazing! Thank you for sharing so honestly-- I really wish I had seen this before starting HRT. I am so glad I'm transitioning, but it's also a very hard road. Also, not many people talk about how seeing a slightly different person in the mirror every morning is simultaneously wonderful and stressful. It's just so much change, and change is hard! Thank you for showing me that I'm not alone in sometimes feeling stressed by that, and that it doesn't mean this isn't the right path for me. Going forward is hard, but going back is unimaginable.

[@jacmoll9]

Such a great honest video. I’ve experienced the same things. I know exactly what it feels like to look in the mirror and ask myself who am I. Thanks for your honesty

[@bino0234]

I couldn't wait to start on hrt. I thought finally I could be the me. When. I started hrt I wish someone would have told me what in detail will happen to me. But I'm glad you shared that I really thought I was the only one

[@sadievalentino519]

Thank you so much for your guidance! I recently came out and I finally found a transition therapist. 1st appointment soon!!😊

[@petrieq9373]

Wonderful!! Intelligently spoken from the heart!! I have the same thing when I forget to take my estrogen, I feel dead inside. And has affected by intimacy with my boyfriend since a big part of it for a woman is feeling emotions. Take too much estrogen and my moods swing.

[@gabrielsilvestredelima]

this video feels like the hug i needed. Thank you so much

[@jokerwolf8687]

Be Yourself. You are not Them. You are You. And That's All You Ever Need to Be. If You want to Change something about Yourself then Do It for Yourself. Not anyone else. Be Happy, Be Healthy, Be Wise, Be You.

[@petrieq9373]

Amusingly, I was unprepared to be an attractive young woman. Prior, I was more the pretty boy and girls were not into me, even though I was athletic. Then I changed and guys were all over me. I was not prepared for it and I made some mistakes in relationships. My looks was very feminine but sometimes my manners were a little camp, which I needed to soften.

[@leisasreallyreal8815]

Mathilda I do agree with you. However, because we go through so much when transitioning I don't think some of us can think of everything to warn about. Until you started talking about these things I had forgotten about some of them. Life's journey is hard enough and we only can do our best to get through it. I'm glad you adjusted and I feel we are no different going through life as any other women (cis). We can not allow the past haunt us. I do not believe there is one person in the world who doesn't say "If I only knew". We are Blessed to be a Blessings. Thank you for your insight I know this will help someone.

[@kingtriton2013]

This was so relieving to hear. I constantly have these feelings and thoughts! Thank you! I wish more people talked more about the mental side of transitioning!

[@plant.hacks.4.ur.environment]

I’m trying to see how to begin my transition and Matilda you really inspired me and gave me hope for a bright future. I wish you the best and happiness. Thank you so much for sharing these experiences with us!

[@roberthendrix8520]

Just want to drop a hello. I have finally just accepted that I don't belong in my body and am so lost. Your vids are helping me understand were ill be in the future. TY so much. Keep it up

[@DoppyDo]

THANK YOU SO MUCH ABOUT ALL OF THIS!!! IM ABOUT TO TRANSITION AND I NEEDED IT.

[@karlalvsmissy9437]

The way you’re acting and talking now is wonderful !

[@ambienttechno]

All of these videos are well done. Like a living diary is true. One can see you bare your emotional soul on camera. Amazing self disclosure and introspection. Much respect always.

[@buffysaviation]

I’ve just come out as transgender (MtF) to some people and amazingly got a lot of support. I’m probably nowhere near medically transitioning because of my family. Your videos have given me hope for the future. Thank you

[@hehehello3251]

So proud of you! Do you have any life updates about it?

[@fubytv731]

This is really inspiring. Because I've always looked really down on myself, like, decency doesn't really apply to trans people. So I always have that principle to just be with whoever wants to be with me. I guess I should learn to love myself first , even though it's still hard to do.

[@veganarchistcommunist3051]

I'm just now coming to terms with my own identity and want to go through transition. The only thing that seems to be stopping me is how I think other people will deal with it. I am bouncing between being terrified of discrimination and ridicule and being comfortable in myself and that what anyone else thinks doesn't matter. It's a shame that what other people think seems to matter more than being able to be myself.

[@luketurner2887]

I'm just beginning my journey, and I hope that I transition into a beautiful, honest & radiant girl like you.

[@hairlessmonkey86]

I love the "obviously" ❤️

[@Sophie-mv7bd]

Because it is obvious

[@kristerpedersen1645]

I’m actually struggling a lot with not knowing how to act during transitioning, especially at the moment, before I’ve started HRT. This helps me a lot though, knowing I’m not alone

[@zoey8238]

Lol wish I watched this 3years ago. Thank you love for sharing everything! You are such an amazing woman!! Keep them coming girl!!

[@Sunnydale-up4mh]

I'm going to start transitioning and this video has really helped me know what to expect and validate some of the things I've been feeling. Thank you for making this!

[@porsha1678]

im starting hrt soon so thankyou for talking about those things😊

[@biorythmicshifter]

I’m just another human that got randomly recommended by a KZbin algorithm. I’ve never really thought about this type of approach of life expressing itself, that’s not meant from a bad place just a place of living in a somewhat sheltered small town mentality paradigm. Get up go to work, get married, have children then die. This is an interesting expression of the human experience, one I would never judge negatively mind you. I’m a simple lad, I see a pretty face I click. Bottom line you are a beautiful person that deserves to be happy in this life and I appreciate listening to your take on it. Much love and respect, be yourself...

[@Nana-ej3qo]

Mathilda, you're a beautiful woman. Une superbe femme, définitivement.

[@misspiggy6667]

elem arha gender dysphoria isn’t a facade

[@pallaciccione7885]

@@misspiggy6667 s

[@misfitangel8637]

I so relate to what you were saying about being a feminine boy, but finding it hard to be a feminine girl initially, and worrying about being too feminine and being seen as a stereotype. I struggled with that for years in my transition, I held back so much of my femininity just because I was worried that people would tell me I was trying to be a parody of a woman. It took just over two years, and the women in my family opening up to me and welcoming me into their circle to realise that I honestly shouldn’t give a shit about what other people would say, I should just be myself. Transitioning is such a learning process. When I started on hormones I hoped I’d be exactly who I was supposed to be, but you have to really put in the work to find out what kind of woman you’re going to become, and be happy in. But every awkward day, every messy year, has been totally worth it, because it’s made me into the woman I am today. Love the video❤️

[@williamb7275]

Your videos keep getting better Mathilda. Good advice.

[@Jessica-zg5mb]

Gotta have those "hip hopity goals" :)

[@SlaughterDog]

“Love your trans identity” is the biggest thing I took away here. I just started transitioning and have been hoping that one day I pass 100% and can then be stealth, but I also wish to have been born as a girl and I know that can’t retroactively happen.

[@RobertNeDlro]

Honestly same thing for me. But i'm the opposite, Just to let you know you are a girl! You are who you are, and I wish the best of luck

[@laurenkirby97]

You have nothing to worry about, you'll pass easily, you'll judge yourself to higher standards than other people would and since the difference is gradual you wouldn't notice it as much without comparison photos so it will be hard to tell. Try to think of it like this, if you were just going about your business taking public transportation somewhere for instance and you see a bunch of people, how likely do you think it is that you'd notice at all if one of them or more were trans? Odds are you wouldn't notice or care much even though they might be having a silent meltdown in their head about not being sure if they pass or not.

[@RobertNeDlro]

@@laurenkirby97 I kinda have a downside.. transphobic and religious parents

[@francescajensen7733]

Hi Mathilda! I can relate to your feeling pre-HRT and I think most of the fear felt is because of being young and inexperienced in moving through the world. I've known I was really a girl since before the age of three and hid that fact from everyone for years and years. I was terrified of the consequences of coming out. I have always suffered from dysphoria and it became severe with the start of puberty. It brought with it suicidal ideations, extremely low self esteem and depression. The interesting thing about all of this is that I was never in denial about being trans but I was in denial that it was important. I got married, went to law school, and raised a family. I really didn't want to lose what I had and continued hiding. I got to a point at which I could no longer hide, came out, and prompty lost everything. I started HRT and felt better than I ever had. I wasn't expecting much from HRT and was ecstatic when everything started coming along much faster than I ever expected. Also, having grown up and matured, I really didn't care what anyone thought or said about me. Don't get me wrong, I really didn't want to lose the woman I loved, friends, family, and all the rest. It would have been great to have been born cis but I would never push a magic button if it meant giving up the time I had with my wife and kids. The only choice was moving forward and I really don't care if others see me as undergoing it, overdoing it, or being a freak for doing it at all. With age comes the realization that what others think or feel is completely irrelevant - what matters is being your authentic self even if it's only for you. I think that next time I get in line for a new body I'm going to be a hell of alot more careful! Lol! Much love!❤❤❤💃💞

[@ladydivaalfee]

Exactly! I'm a kick boxer! I grew up in a very good neighbourhood

[@alice_hj8185]

I just got an add from Mathilda interrupting Mathilda, too much to comprehend.

[@Beafree]

Girl just be you and to hell with what anyone thinks cause i can tell you (as a cis woman) women are VERY critical to each other. This is why women say we should be sticking together rather than tearing each other down. You are a beautiful woman, embrace yourself and your beauty. Be you. Please anyone transitioning, love and embrace who you are. Its no one’s business how you do your makeup, how you dress, or how you act. Other peoples opinions of you don’t matter. We are all evolving everyday, give yourself permission to do the same.

[@lhernandez9367]

Thank you so much for your honesty and educating us. I am a teacher and I am so grateful that because of you I know a little better what transgender people experience and I could be there for students and understand them better if they would be going through these processes, too!

[@christophertaylor6438]

the way you made me wait for it!!!!!!!! "hi guys its ya girl mathilda ______________ obviously!!!!!!!!!! i cracked up!!!!!!

[@mbgamer0592]

As someone that’s just come out after five years of keeping it secret mum and dad to me to hell and won’t let me start my transition so I’m just here hoping every night I can be myself, this is all helping so much Iove your channel thx for all the help you have done

[@davidvignola1752]

watching your videos helps me put together questions for my doctor whose planning hrt with me.

[@That_dark_ranger]

Each transition is unique so ppl who say shit can take a walk :) your diary helps me anyways so thanks 💛

[@lunabush4315]

You are a beautiful person, thank you for these videos and everything you do, you're very inspiring and helpful, thank you a million times over

[@some_day_soon]

Thank you for sharing! You answered a lot of questions I was afraid to ask anyone :)

[@pillberry305]

“I wished every single day that I would not be alive“ that sentence encapsulates me so much! I am currently at a jumping off point where if I don’t transition I can’t live anymore. I started HRT two weeks ago and I’m very very, very scared. I need some total positivity, but every transwoman on KZbin, just keeps saying, understandably, how difficult and scary it is. Now I go through waves of joy, when I am pushing forward and taking action towards transitioning, but also what I’m used to in my life: not wanting to be alive.

[@jadelust9827]

I just found your channel today and i sat down and watched your videos ! ❤️ you are amazing and thank you for the information it’s helpful ! 😘 I’m thinking about transitioning

[@maryannflannigan7468]

I understand you girl. Sometimes I'm a mess too. I know about never being cis gendered. I still haven't had any surgeries. My dating life was horrible. My first date, I thought I was going to be raped. Awful time. But I love who I am now. ❤❤❤

[@abbyjo75]

Congratulations on your transition, first and foremost. Your videos gave helped me to understand myself more. I totally get that fear and uncertainty you were talking about. Hearing your words, "love your trans identity" really hit gome. Thanks for the wonderful videos. It's refreshing to see, and gear, such honesty accompanied by such beauty. Keep up the fantastic work!

[@stephaniereese7160]

I know exactly what you're experiencing cause I'm experienced the same mood swings and stuff like that

[@stuartbecky]

The best vid I have been looking for on the net. Thank you! 😭

[@raya_hsn]

Love you girl ❤❤ Thanks for sharing your experiences with us.

[@StepfordCuckoo]

Thank you so, so much for this. I've only recently come out as trans (and even then, not completely) and am starting to explore what to do next. I know it's not going to be all sunshine and rainbows, but it is *so important* to HEAR it from people who've been through it, and to hear all about the various sides of the experience, to understand it's okay if there are days where things are off, days where you won't recognise the face in the mirror, etc etc. I am so nervous about what my next steps are, when I'll be between who everyone including myself, has known all these years and who I'll start to be outwardly, but knowing the good AND the...not bad, but that there are ups and downs, that it's like everything else in life, really help.

[@delune7895]

so nice to hear a trans perspective on gender stereotypes! thank you for being so open !!

[@femalegoku5745]

Thank you I I want to be respected to thank you for the advice and thank you for the answers you helped me a lot

[@margaretnonhlanhlasebopelo6650]

I am about to start my Transition your videos are making it feel gud bcoz I know what to expect in transitioning

[@QUEEN-cn4ln]

Honestly rn I’ve been on hormones & but wen disphoria kicks in it DOES pls send me positive vibes 🥺🤍

[@mikecarbone828]

Greetings Mathilda! In my opinion you seem very natural and totally feminine. Many cultures around the world frequently talk with their hands, some, like myself find it difficult to properly communicate without the use of my hands, and although I am a cis male, I know many women too that would find it difficult to convey their thoughts without the use of their hands. Sometimes people cannot fully understand what you are trying to communicate to them without hand gestures to further augment what is being said. I can relate to expectations in the dating world, although my experience is very different. After I had been injured in an industrial accident, I felt unworthy to expect to establish a meaningful relationship with an attractive and decent young woman, I felt like women like that deserve to be with someone that is not physically compromised, and I did not even try to date anyone for years, and after around twenty (20) years, I began to lower my standards, and as a consequence I ended up with a few bad relationships, one that was very brief, and the most recent lasted for almost seven (7) years and went completely off the rails suddenly and I was assaulted and displaced. I narrowly avoided getting chopped up with a machete. It has been about five years since, and I have still not been interested in dating anyone. I have found your videos informative and instructional, and I have found you to be a very genuine and entertaining person to view. I find that you are a delightful, inspirational, and uplifting woman, and you should in no way settle for anyone that doesn’t fully respect you. I have seen videos of other transgender women, and you should know that you are one of the most genuine women that I have seen, and you should never feel you are not worthy to have the life you want to have. Thank you posting this video, I have been learning a lot from your videos and have gleaned a greater understanding from your videos about women and about the obstacles you have had to face to become the woman you have become, and I have a greater appreciation for your efforts. Please have an excellent and awesome day! 🙂

[@nightlef]

I’m a trans guy wanting to be a women and it is difficult I often say who is gonna love some one like me and I have had people interested in dating me but when the found out I wanted to be a women the left and that’s one of the hardest things i felt and at first I was really scared to tell my family and friends about but most of them are Actually Supportive and your videos have helped me in last two videos to understand what I would be getting in to and answered question I had about the change and help me feel more better about my self of being who I truly am thanks so much will continue to keep watching your videos

[@korykurtz2780]

I love your videos so much This really helps due to my disforia

[@MattWesss]

Hey Mathilda, Thank you for being so honest and open about your feelings. I can imagine that it must be hard to have some of those feelings and thoughts that you describe. But there are some thing that you just can't change. And feeling bad about it isn't gonna change it either (easier said than done, i know). Like being born as a girl but in a mans body. But you did change the things that you can. Like becoming a girl in a girls body. And not giving a crap about haters for instance ;-). And about feeling different, everybody is different! A lot of people feel that they are wat different than the rest and believe me, i know how it feels. But you are at your best when you are just being yourself. And you have plenty of reasons to feel good about yourself. I think you're a very nice girl, you know a lot about stuff and you're a good looking girl. Much love from the Netherlands X Ps. When is dress like a girl, i use the name Mathilda ;-). Because i like it and it's almost the equivalent of my boys name.

[@69indigoblue]

Thanks for your open words. What I do not understand is, how someone who decided to go all the way could NOT know all these things. It might took years of research and self-awareness and talking to people and therapists and psychologists etc. before even starting with hormones. And they ALL say nothing about the things you mentioned? Hard to believe...

[@obietrice2824]

Happy birthday btw Till😉🍾🎊

[@switchbladeromance1466]

You don't need to tell people you are trans..you 100% pass ..you are prettier than most wimin so don't get to hung up on it!!!!!. I look good for my age..I'm not a kid.. .Im in my 30s...I love being trans..I own it!..hope you find peace of mind and happiness. XX😘

[@davidfishman2827]

I admire you. You’re an inspiration to me.

[@saundaxlrose]

Thank you! This helped me so much.

[@kennethbodnar6762]

As a trsns in hiding at work I costly fear getting outed at work. Home life is good. My partner who I started dating before I accepted myself has stood by my side. And event though they don't understand my feelings and at times have difficulty with the situation they still stand by me. How ever my work. I love my work, without it I could not say that I could be where I'm at without my job. But they don't know. And its not a safe place for trans. And when I do decide to take the hrt step, I don't know if I can do so at my job.

[@stevenbullis8834]

Honey, once you find the right man, everything your talking about now won't cross your mind as much. He will love you, Unconditionally! Plus your young, you have so many years ahead of you. I just try to live day by day, and stay away from any drama. We all find out sooner or later who our true friends are, and usually it's really only one or two if your lucky in the world we live in today. Sad but true.

[@yonihales9133]

Ive come to realize diffremt countries allow only particular medicines here in America it's estradiol and Spiro to block T. What do they use in Switzerland?

[@gachatube5271]

As long as your happy that’s all that matters

[@ASTRA1564]

Very informative, enjoy your videos as always. Peace and live from America. ✌️

[@roxycastleton4040]

I am 48 years old and I am starting Transitioning.

[@JustSoSophia]

Omg I love you. This is so relatable! ❤❤❤

[@wiki3061]

The HRT part I relate. I've been on the pills for a few months now, and already I feel like that when I look in the mirror.

[@badaboomrock]

Please don't be hard on yourself you helped me keep going I was on the verge of quitting my transition and the main reasons is the reasons that you said how about never being treated this cis that bothers me for as long as I can remember all I wanted to be was a mommy and be with a baby and I can't do that I'm really sad that there are women out there that hates that hey that ability to have kids and throw it away when there are people like us that would give anything to be able to experience what they take for granted I've had women say when you don't have to have a period so you're not a woman but I would gladly have a period If I could

[@elkshepherd9th]

You're doing good Mathilda!

[@christiewoods325]

"Love your trans identity" This is SO true!!!! Thank You!!!! Hugs!!! Christie

[@aurora3655]

I did the same type of vlog awhile ago. I deleted it out of fear because of being stalked on line.

[@missycitty9478]

If you thought there wouldn't be any struggles and some hardships, you didn't do enough research prior or were watching the wrong videos. Sadly. :( I hope you are in a much better place, currently. ♥

[@donbargainhunter7472]

Thanks for sharing you go girl 👍❤️

[@evelynmarie8693]

Transitioning is hard but I think that we become stronger but when we realize the we isn't a concept. I am who I am because we built me to be I.

[@shannonjohnson4117]

I wanna transition too

[@June_isYourFriend]

I’m genderfluid, so, i almost never know what I am, so... I don’t know what else to say... but it’s so confusing... cause I can’t go on hormones or anything, but then how can I be a boy, (genetically female) if I don’t sound male, it’s so confusing......

[@kenziestoneman7141]

With me it took me so long to realize who I was because I was in self denial yes I was going through bullying I was going through a lot of trials and tribulations not to mention epilepsy drugs they kind of have a way of Swiss cheese in your memory and all that but as soon as I learned to Love myself for who I was then being trans wasn't really that hard because now when I see people that misgender me it doesn't really bother me because I know who I am and no matter what they say it's not going to make me angry or going to change it so please Matilda just Love yourself and Don't Worry about what anybody else says!! LoTs and LoTs of Love from your SiS Kenzie

[@beeeeeesbury]

Similar experience here, minus the epilepsy, with all the doubts "what if I'm just depressed" or "what if I'm wrong" despite how happy I'd get when referred to as a girl. Feels silly now haha

[@valeriesanchez3074]

5 years on hrt I do see the misleading results people imply online. Like those 6 month hrt update videos, totally bs. I'm still climbing the ladder at 5 years. I do get so much backlash in public and the gossip affects me mentally. It is a challenge, but transition is worth it. If you are financially stable, transitioning can be easy.

[@danielbalazs6041]

Hey Mathilda! I love your channel and I have a questionn. Okay so my question is that how much time did it take to get your voice on the level it is now with a vocal coach. It would really help me if you would answer. Ily❤️

[@reneperez5518]

I believe that even being as a transgender woman life is about roles and as a women it’s about to fill fill this role. The physical appearance match the life or the female role. Be happy, sexy and pretty.

[@lordcrimson913]

I haven't started hrt yet, but like many other things in life, I wish I started sooner. I'm 25 now and wish I had done this a lot younger, even at 18 I had quite feminine build, with larger hips and thicker thighs but now I've gotten quite....burly I guess you could say and my dysphoria has gotten worse for it. My facial hair grows rapidly and the hair is thick, I detest it but I can't shave as often because I like to shave it to the skin, leave no trace of it, but I need disinfectant/alcohol to keep the skin clean and not irritated after shaving like that, and with the current pandemic we're rationing all our medical supplies and it's been getting to me. I've heard dysphoria gets worse once you come to terms with your identity as a trans person and it really has, I wish I was able to hit that magic switch like many other trans women but I know this will be a years long process.

[@alicenightbird4316]

I wish someone warned me about the pseudo-period. Once a month my body hates me...parts of me that don't exist hurt, and I have mood swings and...yeah...nobody talked about that at all. Kinda caught me by surprise. lol