80% of all autoimmune diseases happen to women | Mel Robbins

[@n0tgunshy]

Ironically, getting an autoimmune disease has taught me to put myself first.

[@bajalala5153]

Same 👍🏼

[@madamchairman2538]

Same❤

[@aking3624]

I always joke that the disease fit me perfectly...who better to beat myself ... Than me!!!😖🤦🤪

[@Xtina2525]

Same

[@pysvtfa4]

Same.

[@TsetseboampemAcquah]

When you reject yourself enough for others, your body learns to reject you too.

[@Sunnivah13]

WOah, good description!!

[@militzaadrid9467]

...I agree. After feeling like a pro taking care of me I fáciles hard to please others again. I'm getting better now, away from so much drama

[@dd-pm9cg]

Wish I knew this long ago.... probably this is the right time as per the Universe.

[@corinnekae1736]

Sad...

[@ryuukakhadijah7766]

Well said. I tried to explain this to men that got cheated to stop carpet blaming, "women are all the same" stuff and explained to them that women has endured mistreatment by men and society for centuries, but of course, they don't want to read the history...🤷‍♂️ Carpet blaming is much more fun

[@TSquared604]

This needs to be posted everywhere.

[@Elenihellas963]

This is exactly what I am doing now...

[@umitozdiler1752]

Bu seni ilgilendiren bir konu değil Gargamel yırttın😅😅😅

[@GemmaDann]

Men can't USE women in all the ways they always have if this knowledge becomes prevalent. Good luck with sending it out there though.

[@charmainechatkin4263]

this is me

[@janice2992]

Yes he is right. Too much pressure and your circuits burn. My thyroid went under active and I got chronic fatigue syndrome. 26 years now. It fluctuates some better days some can't get out of bed days.

[@mosthighdaughter7169]

This gentleman just described my entire character and yes I'm 39 trying to recover from an autoimmune disease.

[@CarolineGovender-zu6yv]

Me as well.no one will understand what u are going through. 😢they think it's something that u will recover from like having the flu.

[@phialinfernandez8387]

I am 70. And I have always always wanted to end myself.

[@faysmith1370]

Can you recover? Much love from 33 year old who is auto immune since 20 an really wants to get better for my kids.

[@babydollbecca]

I've seen that a lot of autoimmune issues can be majorly improved after repairing the gut and avoiding endocrine disruptors. I'm in the same boat as the 3 of you, at 34 but ill since 19. wish you all the best in healing 🙏🏻

[@juliewilliams2604]

I’m not alone! I’m in the same age range as you and at the moment I haven’t been diagnosed with an autoimmune disease but I just had to have a biopsy done to determine if I have one. I should know early next week. I have all these same characteristics that he just described and I don’t think I have ever considered that it could have something to do with what’s going on with my body. I’m sorry that you are all dealing with autoimmune issues. I hope this isn’t bad to say but it’s nice to know that I’m not alone and that there are others out there who are my age and who share my characteristics and who also deal with medical issues that other people can’t relate to or understand. I mean that in the best way possible. I wish you all better health in the future!

[@hfam4202]

Wow, I think he’s talking about me. I need to start changing my position in life and start protecting my health and emotional needs more.

[@BeInspired2177]

You & me both. It may not be easy, but we can do it! Wishing you a beautiful day!!

[@lisaosbourne-eden4576]

This man just dropped so much wisdom in like 30 seconds I need more of this

[@coachingRN]

His book, "When the body says No" is incredible. All of his books are brilliant.

[@kzfingerprint]

"... able to to be angry in a healthy way" - felt that...

[@RealityBubbles]

Meh, my mother ruined that by threatening to kick me out when I was 4-5yo

[@elleaubry3772]

@@RealityBubbles I’m sorry your mother mistreated you, but don’t let her her ruin the rest of your life. you can be your own champion with some good therapy, you can move past this and have a really happy life. I wish you the best.

[@elena2125]

Angry in a healthy way... well, they start calling you karen.

[@doanphuong1325]

@@elena2125😂if you think that way than maybe….

[@inoshishi8]

I have anger issues, so yes, it definitely resonated deeply. 😶😳

[@IsabellaLondon-e8d]

I have done this for last 63.5 years. Now, I am caring for myself 1st Investing in my health!

[@rumdeal]

Same here. We can still care about others without sacrificing our own wellbeing and emotional needs. Constantly putting others needs ahead of our own drains our physical and mental strength and can make us ill. Dr Gabor is spot on here

[@donnaatienza8001]

yes indeed we need to take better care of ourselves and to sometimes put our self first

[@ilax4244]

I have symptoms of an autoimmune disease . Not sure if I can turn it around but I will start now that I know. Blessings and good health to everyone here. 🙋

[@yadiraalbornoz3046]

Men need to be more femenine please! Instead of a man telling us to be a bit more egotistical like they are.

[@User-2cents]

62. 59 start

[@Stephyroo]

Starting age 30ish, I found myself constantly getting sick. No matter how healthy I ate . How much I worked out. My hair starting falling out. I realized it was due to my environment. For years being told by the man you love that you don't deserve anything, that no one else could ever stand you like they do, that you're a problem. Its amazing how much your health improves without them in the equation

[@SpiritualLifeCoach43]

Good health is wealth ladies. Do what makes you happy too.

[@nansweetnan]

Most women are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. I left a good job bc I was pressured by my in laws to be a stay home mom. I felt guilt at work & guilt at home, never feeling like I could do anything right. Developed the most devastating depression that nearly ended me-no sleep for months. Not once during my illness did those who criticized me for being “too ambitious “ & a bad mother offered help. I regret acquiescing to the catholic guilt & will never fall for someone else’s doctrine again. I learned to invest what money I had, got a better job and took care of my child-who was not ruined by an ambitious, hard working mother. Stay strong ladies, be an example for your children! ❤

[@bianchaesson1441]

WELL DONE!!!❤❤❤

[@thealchemist333]

May you be blessed tenfold✨✨✨✨

[@carolinacarsolio5476]

Guilt at work and guilt at home! 🎯 I didn't choose to stop working, my healthy made me... Hypothiroidism, Fybromialgya, chronic Fatigue... Looking back (20 yrs) I can see the pattern clearly, What did I expect my body to do under that pressure? Not only to do everything for every body, but also excel in the profesional environment. It was just too much and my body just collapsed 🤷

[@PennyCrooks]

@@carolinacarsolio5476 A few years back I read that fibromialgia can be caused by a deficiency of vitamin D3. Look up information on the connection of the two and remember to also take vitamin K with it. The vitamin K helps the body absorb and use the vitamin D3 better.

[@carolinacarsolio5476]

@PennyCrooks thx, I'll look into it

[@cindybogart6062]

His book” when the body says no “ is amazing. You should read it!

[@adriannemalden8668]

TY for the info.

[@lisae6725]

Thank you. I need a to read it. He really connects to my soul.

[@nelialerios8222]

THANK YOU, I AM GOING TO BUY ONE, I FEEL LIKE I HE TALKING ABOUT ME? HE DESCRIBED MOST ABOUT WHAT I AM!

[@dream_tn133]

Thank you so, so, so mucch❤🥰🤗🤗🤗

[@MrPathorock]

Right, make money from fake sympathy

[@sapp382]

The body keeps the score, and this is so true

[@gallakochar4245]

🚩Body keeps score is excellent book 📕

[@rebekah1836]

I can't get past the first few pages. It's such an amazing book, but heartbreaking for me

[@AnneMarieNicol]

Too right ,the body keeps score!

[@anniecesantiago2401]

​@@rebekah1836same here. I'm going to try again

[@sherrymurphy855]

There is much controversy surrounding this book and rightfully so. If you research the author and book before reading it, you'll find that many people believe it should come with a disclaimer... a "trigger warning." This book is not for everyone.

[@staycool163]

Holy crap, he just explained ME! Although it's too little too late, I NO LONGER put other people before myself. A lesson learned the hard way. And the ironic thing is, ALL those people I put before myself, disappeared when I got sick!

[@dd-pm9cg]

Only during your difficult times you will get to know the true colors of people especially the so called loved ones. Let's trust that everything is for our greater good.

[@zoezwar9911]

I feel exactly the same way. I’m trying to convince myself that it’s not too late 💔

[@staycool163]

​@@zoezwar9911really take to heart what he is saying... Don't let it be too late. Remember, it's NOT selfish to put your own needs first. Do something nice for yourself today, and make it a great day!

[@staycool163]

​@@dd-pm9cgyou are so right. Although it hurt immensely at the time, I see now that those people weren't meant to take my journey with me. I'm not bitter (anymore), I'm grateful and thankful and blessed. Have a great day! 😊

[@dd-pm9cg]

@@staycool163 You too have a great life ahead 🤝 Not becoming bitter after a struggle is a great achievement in life. Kudos to you 👏

[@christinag8782]

Teaching myself to take care of me FIRST has been so life-changing for my mental health. Letting others be responsible for themselves. It feels selfish initially but then you realize how these people never actually cared about you and only care about what you can do for them.

[@socal5039]

I used to be like that 7 years ago then one day I woke up. I had enough. I literally cut off anyone, that was toxic in my life. Family or friends. That includes my sisters. I really started to heal myself, I added different holistic modality to help me heal my emotional and mental state. Now I have boundaries and I love myself and my life. I don't allow anyone to hurt me emotionally, mentally or physically. I have forgiven everyone but that doesn't mean I have to hang out with them or have a relationship. I wish everyone in my life, even if they hurt me, peace and love and I release them and let them go. 🙏🏽❤

[@VonclissJoseph]

What a beautiful soul you have!. Your story I identify with!. ❤

[@heathernunes4027]

Very powerful!! I did the same, 7 years ago! Life changing!

[@AnneRoe-kp1hs]

Me also , Never been happier or so content.

[@branwen8009]

(Edited to explain- As you read the small book that I've written, it might be amusing to know that a trait of people with ADHD is to over share. In my 'former life', I would've apologized, but my therapist says that it's very cleansing & not to hold back! We can all blame him for the following story! 😆😂) Absolutely beautiful that you and the other 2 people who commented here have found 'the secret' that the medical community is not sharing with us! I was diagnosed with advanced RA, Reynaud's Disease, and ADHD at 36! I didn't do anything whatsoever with that knowledge though because I already knew how to live with pain, how to struggle through disorganization, and I certainly didn't have time to do infusions! (RH treatment was very different in the early '00s) My story echoes so many of us who have too much on our plates, but continue to pile more on while not stopping once to think about, let alone, actually take care of ourselves! 🥴. At the time of my diagnosis, I had been teaching HS for 15yrs in a dangerous inner city school, spending my days & evenings worried about where my students were sleeping,if they were eating, and if they made it thru the night alive. I had been married to a violent, alcoholic, narcissist w/bipolar disorder for 13yrs, dodging his verbal and physical attacks between running him back and forth to counseling or inpatient stays. I was 7yrs into homeshooling 3 children- 1 with multiple learning disorders, AuDHD, & BP & making sure that his mental health was balanced and his educational needs met. I was volunteering as Director of childrens' worship in a denomination whose pastor and ideology made it clear that women were 2nd class, that wives were to do EXACTLY as their husbands said, and that mine was not abusive (My bruises & repeated facial fractures had to be due to my clumsiness according to the pastor.🥹) I was also pretty much running our farmstead alone because my husband's mental health and addiction had obviously spiralled out of control as the years progressed and, of course, the church blamed me. Looking back, I'm surprised that I didn't have a full nervous breakdown! Instead, 10yrs of neglecting my RA had advanced to the point of needing 4 joint replacements, my ENT said 1 more blow to the face was going to cause serious structural damage, and then I found myself in a life flight helicopter trying to live through multiple clots in my lungs (Pulmonary Embolism). Those 3 events were the wakeup call that I needed! I'm now single, have hips and shoulders that work 😁, am not a member of any organized religion- although I still have faith, and I've traded the inner city teaching job for caring for children in hospice. While work is still a bit stressful, it has allowed me time to enjoy my old hobbies again. ☺️Therapy has changed my life by reinforcing that I can say 'no', that I should stop apologizing for everything, and that I absolutely deserve to take care of myself! ☺️ I really don't mind sharing my life story. If someone sees part of their situation in what I've said, and it helps them in any way, what I've gone through has been worth it. 🕊️

[@heathernunes4027]

@@branwen8009 The changes and improvements in my quality of life are indescribable. I can only hope the same happens for anyone managing the same type of variables in their life. Regardless to the past, to the present, to our expected future…Every single one of us is worth the effort!✨

[@KellyKelly-qd7my]

Thank you for posting this. I keep telling my husband and my children that they are literally killing me by not taking responsibility for things in their lives and putting it all on me. I already suffer from ankylosis spondylitis, lipedema, thalassemia among other things. After 20 years of toxic marriage where my husband let his parents make a scape goat out of me I realized that he used me and taught by example our kids to view me the same way.....as someone who is unworthy of consideration. I'm 40 going on 50, I'm all gray and deep like I'm 90+ years old. Being an empath is deadly 💔

[@mightymidas2021]

I could have wrote your comment, only I am still there

[@RavenVapor873]

Yes it is - but I didn't know that we had a choice! It's literally the way I am. I didn't get a choice in the matter. I don't regret it. I just wish I would get a clue about us. We break too easily. 🌺

[@annjames1837]

Can you imagine a world void of empathy! How dark it would be.

[@rosemaryd284]

I hear you. I see you in the mirror.

[@godislove3002]

I hear you I see you in the mirror ❤

[@Jessica-J.ones.]

His voice is incredibly comforting. ❤️

[@diannebass1051]

It carries the ring of truth , and understanding 🙏

[@genespell4340]

It's a voice with a lifetime of learning behind it and he knows what he is saying is 100 percent correct.

[@jpholistics]

This is seriously important information. I hope everyone sees this little clip. Please forward it onward!!

[@zalikaharris8676]

Truer words have never been spoken. My 35-year-old sister died recently from an Autoimmune disease recently. We nor the doctors couldn't figure out why her body started attacking her like this, as he explains the characteristics of a person struggling with the disease it sounds just like her! Ladies we have to take care of ourselves. Its vital. She left 6 beautiful children behind along with a husband of 20 years. We are heart broken. 😢

[@JustMe-dn9fh]

May she rest In power.Sorry foe your loss.

[@janice9230]

I am so sorry for your loss 😢😢😢

[@sophiaroyal5233]

So sorry for your loss❤

[@jutta4683]

Das tut mir so leid. Aber wurde sie mit dieser bestimmten Gentherapie geimpft ?

[@deerwithout]

​@@jutta4683 Pietätlos.

[@micki6022]

This is the best explanation I have ever heard. I have alopecia which was caused by stress. I have suffered for many years. Today, I am taking care of me. I don't care who is mad at me for not being at their beck and call in my family. Today, I live for ME!!!! 🎉🥳🙌🏽💗💃🏾

[@KimThomas-vp4vm]

Indeed.

[@annjames1837]

Can you imagine a world void of selflessness and empathy? How dark it would be

[@grabby7667]

Yes, it may be caused by stress but it's your bodies way of telling you that something is off kilter! Stress destroys your gut microbiome and the nutrients you receive aren't getting to the right places!! Fix your gut!!

[@judithgerwarth3492]

I had alopecia and my doctor prescribed high doses of zink. I have been 30 years old at this time. 6 month later I grew new hair. I am 68 now and have healthy hair. It's worth a try. I also at this time had a lot of stress in my life

[@KimThomas-vp4vm]

@@judithgerwarth3492 Stress depletes nutrients in the body. However, in 2020 When I began taking Zinc, within 24 hours I received neurological nerve breast pains. Stopped taking the zinc and the pains stopped within 24 hours. I get enough zinc in my diet.

[@Msparkly-88]

This made me cry. He is so on point. Thank you for spreading the truth 😢

[@donnaatienza8001]

yes indeed we put ourselves last way too often

[@lightwarriorlynnmarie]

Same..me too. Because. It is true.❤

[@phyllismercer9959]

This is so true.

[@Vader_112]

You realize this guy is a total fake right he's not even a medical doctor

[@branwen8009]

​@@Vader_112 Incorrect! He has a BA and an MD from the University of British Columbia. He attained his MD in 1977 in family medicine, which means he has been an MD for almost 50 years! I would say that definitely qualifies him as a doctor. Please stop spreading false information and doubt! Dr. Mate is doing absolutely legitimate, brilliant work!

[@remonahurst2606]

I love that he used the word "Programmed". I've been trying, after years of chronic bad health to undo this programming and realising how ingrained it is, not only in me but also in every way I was taught from early childhood into adulthood was quite shocking. Every time I struggled to reconcile that acknowledging my feelings and my needs are valuable and necessary I hear again the words of school teachers and parents alike chastising "Selfishness". That putting oneself before others is a mortal sin and should be not only avoided but punished. I lived in terror that my behaviour would be considered selfish by others, my value became completely tied to my usefulness to others. If I'm not useful to others then I'm worthless... Undoing the damage that way of thinking has caused me may take the rest of my life but the consequences of living with these notions has almost cost me my life on more than one occassion.

[@michellebyrom6551]

We're told that we're selfish for not putting ourselves last. How selfish is it of others not to return the favour of putting us first, the way they expect us to treat them? Think of the plane crash instructions - put on your own oxygen mask before trying to help anyone else including your children.

[@avril.227]

Trauma or chronic stress is supposedly the trigger for autoimmune diseases. I also believe that our quality of food is a large component to illnesses. I used to be extremely healthy and resilient.

[@trace2116]

Gosh. This man knows me personally 😢. His description fits me perfectly. 😭. Autoimmune hair loss.

[@claudiadickerman4218]

Hair loss??!!! I have been to three different Dermatologists over four years for "unexplained" and still not fixed hair loss. It is not alopecia they have all said, it is not ring worm or any other fungal thing, it is not bacterial, it is not allergy to hair products, the list goes on of what they ALL have said. I have been given more RX's for medicated shampoo, scalp oils, pills and more and still NO specialist can tell me what is going on. It is so itchy I feel like I am going to freak out if it doesn't stop, and when I do succumb to scratching, it is like an invisible mist falls across my eyes and face, my eyes begin to get red and dry and hurt, and my face when I touch it feels almost like a numb feeling, that only happens if I get to scratching. So this short has put me onto something that four years of misery and trying to get help hasn't . His description is me, all the way. I am "known" in my friend circle as the caregiver, I have taken care of several friends who died before their time from cancer, kidney disease, and more, I took care of my father for years until he passed and he was was not fun, I am taking care of my younger brother who I am living with because he is a single father and has a disabled son whom he needed help with, meantime he gets throat cancer, I nursed him through that which was horrific and still is plagued with huge after effects of radiation and chemo, now he has another cancer diagnosis, and his son has been disabled since birth with developmental delays and he is on the autism spectrum and suffered from a birth defect that caused his large bowel to malfunction and have to be removed so he has an illiostomy for life on top of everything else he has. I am running the house totally including being the resident geek for tech and administrative duties and dealing with medical insurance and more. MMMM, could all this be WHY my hair is falling out? I do not want to abandon them, but it has occurred to me that if I don't move away and back to my beloved AZ (I moved to SC sold my house and left all my friends and social activities behind 9 yrs ago), I think I have finally gone overboard in caring and I am gonna have to have a serious talk with my brother and get back to my own life or this will be the end of me, not just the end of my hair. Thank you for this short, I REALLY NEEDED to hear this.

[@deborahmannino3775]

Me too! Thyroid problems

[@VWHNeal1018]

I am learning to put myself first. No is a complete sentence. If I can’t do it , I won’t. And I have empathy for others, but I come first.

[@Deborah-y1f]

Yes because you can't help anyone else if you're unhealthy

[@michelehendriks5686]

No hun, because your (mental) health, your time and your happiness is just as valuable as anyone else's. And because nobody is able take care of you like you yourself are. I know helping other people seems like the only worthy end goal, but not while you are giving away yourself in the process. I know, i am a recovering people pleaser too.. 😉🫶🏼😘

[@ForeverTogether219]

@@michelehendriks5686 💯✌️🤗

[@catcolb11]

Exactly! ❤

[@maansteen1973]

True that and being good selfish is a must and mandatory ... especially in cultures where women are supressed by male energy...religion society or otherwise..it must stop..now

[@kopsie6379]

Add me to the 80%. Diagnosed at midlife after a lifetime of putting others first. 😢

[@lori6156]

I definitely relate to what you’re saying, I too was groomed to put others first. He described each point perfectly. God help us now.

[@tracysmith-yv5lt]

i was in my 30s now im in my 50s me first from now on

[@thelionandthemouse9933]

Me three💔💔💔 I am definitely in that category 😭😭😭😭

[@krisborden9092]

Right there with ya...am 54 and just finding and putting it together...I have what's now looking like a few more autoimmune problems then just hoshimottos..now Labs show sle positive..

[@rev.jessiebrandon2600]

I remember in my mental health training the professor said it was accepted that a healthy human showed anger, a healthy male showed anger but a woman who showed anger was not considered healthy. So we were neither a healthy woman nor conversely a healthy human. 😢

[@jlynngambler]

Exactly... and it makes me cringe when men get to feel anger, but if a woman has a bout of anger and emotions in front of said man, she's being hysterical.

[@elena2125]

we call them Karens now, they are not supposed to show anger. 😮

[@elizabeth_likemercury]

If I get upset around my kids (all male) and my ex, I'd be asked to quiet down. So frustrating

[@vhayashi7369]

​@jlynngambler yep the classic double standard hypocrite BS! 💩😡

[@zaringonda6068]

​@@elena2125 very good observation😮! See how in subtle ways women are being put down even for expressing honestly on the net!

[@sophiaroyal5233]

Described me perfectly. I've been fighting autoimmune diseases for over a decade, I'm 43.

[@GlendaQuinn-s4v]

He just described every good mother..

[@CandiceCabitto]

Good mother without a good partner

[@providenceartdesign]

Good mothers with partners are the ones at the greatest risk. ​@@CandiceCabitto

[@problemiz405]

That part

[@DoesItReallyMatter25]

Diagnosed with cancer at 35 while pregnant! Came after a huge emotional time in my life (mom passing) and this man’s words ring so true. Only after my diagnosis did I realize the extent I self sabotaging by trying to rescue everyone I loved. May we all healthily choose ourselves so that we can be the BEST version of self for our loved ones for decades to come.

[@dk24-be8fk]

I hope you are feeling better. I had a cancer too and that was the discussion we had With other patients under their 40s. I decided at that time to take care of myself first ,but I have to remind that myself that. I wish you a happy healthy for you and your family 😊😊

[@DoesItReallyMatter25]

@ thank you! One day at a time for me but everyday does get better, yes. ☺️I hope you’re feeling better too! I wish us both long, happy & healthy lives ❤️

[@katia_g213]

Yeah. I got Crohn's Disease dealing with family issues, depression, high school drama, work drama, and getting cheated on. So by my senior year I was just hanging on by a thread. The day after Thanksgiving I got help and was in the hospital for almost a month. Many years later and I haven't been on medicine due to finances. I've been okay for the most part because I pulled away from everyone. I've slowly reached back out through the years. Put yourself first, it'll save your life, literally.

[@archanabhardwaj6348]

True !! Girls shd stop giving ppl benefit of doubt and second chances. Putting yourself first is always the key to have a healthy successful life .. all the best fr your new life ❤

[@ingrid5944]

Thank you for telling your story cause that makes me know I'm on the right path putting myself first! I'm very empathetic and I do a lot of what he said on the video.

[@MagnysAa]

Very interesting what you have done / experienced

[@kellithames6422]

Fellow crowns patient. I've always been a very nice person, always felt responsible for making sure others needs were met b4 my own.

[@sayingso1983]

The part where you said you pulled away from everyone that made you better ❤❤❤good for putting yourself first honey

[@lisaakinlabi]

He described me 100%! I am now bedridden with multiple autoimmune diseases. I'm in excruciating daily pain and no one to help me. This, after over 40 years of caring for hundreds of disabled people, children, etc. in my jobs. Caring for my own parents who suffered heart attacks and strokes etc., my kids - one with autism and severe medical issues etc.

[@arieladelinechoo9845]

Change your diet Eat only beef & Butter ONLY for 1 month. You can see changes

[@vivianspringer5142]

​@arieladelinechoo9845 I'm about to try this seriously! I've been Keto for a while, and felt very good; but can't get my blood sugar down enough. Now a nodule on my thyroid affecting my voice...after taking care of my Husband for our whole marriage & he's 100% Disabled...

[@vivianspringer5142]

​@@arieladelinechoo9845B,B,B,E: Beef, Bacon, Butter, Eggs! Water & Salt

[@audradurkee1435]

@@arieladelinechoo9845 You are not a doctor, you don't even know what she is diagnosed with. And yet you give unsolicited, terrible advice? Besides that being dangerous and irresponsible, you do know that you sound like a moron, right?

[@user-to6jm5mw3z]

You got this… it’s a process and I’m still in the process but I promise if you give the same faith you give to those you’ve helped, miracles happen and have faith in whatever God you believe in, you will never be alone in this…. Most importantly it’s what you consume not just food, but vibrations and good frequencies to takeaway from all the bad frequencies being in our everyday lives… research frequencies… xxx ❤

[@Elkycreates]

Helping others is very satisfying and good for the soul and our health. Being a slave for others destroys the soul.

[@saversavvy2670]

So true! Alot of times we can do the same amount of work and the attitude we have can totally change it. Learning that helped me so much! To do something for someone and then play the pity party is not doing anyone favors. Especially ourselves. Say yes to all the good you can for your loved ones, but say no to things that don't matter as much. Say yes to at least an hour a day of you time. Read,meditate, go for a walk, take a bath, etc All my kids when they graduate from high school do their own laundry and have cleaned their own rooms as they grew. They help around the house and have chores. I see moms doing all these things for grown adult children and I am like. Why? It hurts them and their future house mates, spouses, and grandchildren.

[@kenamasunsmith3976]

Every1 who stands up for women, thank you. We are constantly attacked because of jealousy that our bodies produce life and jealousy from other women as well.

[@UnicornPastelPrincess]

"jealousy that our bodies produce life" EHEHEHEHEEHEHEHE

[@mariaabatino9061]

Why there is only one man like him? I find him extraordiary like few others. Very few.

[@bambina3148]

Same

[@ohgawd]

Search Peter Levine, Bessel van Der Kolk and you'll find others as well. These are the people who have studied trauma for decades .

[@trulymysterious]

Read his books. He admits to flaws within himself and not always being mature in his marriage. He's got good insight, is working on himself and has lots to teach, but he's not perfect.

[@irinastefanovska9230]

​@@trulymysterious But knowing and admitting and plus working on improving is close to perfect 😊 He is on another level

[@olderuglierandwiser]

​@@irinastefanovska9230 perfect. ? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Why? Because he can SEE past gender? These are just statistics. The same goes for MEN!! DUTY ROLE AND RESPONSIBILITY. that is also a MAN. this is about auto immune diseases. The way disease presents itself in the female body! So hello!! Men have disease present in other forms.

[@TheJetstream10]

I got one after caregiving for my wife for years. The stress, the trauma we endured all took their toll. But would do it again without hesitation. That is love.

[@deborahmendoza4130]

❤❤❤❤

[@zpan5265]

😢😢❤

[@deeladybug2618]

I can relate ❤

[@GemmaDann]

Self sacrifice. Welcome to the life of a woman.

[@itsgettingold]

Same.

[@dinapawlow1622]

I am going through this now caring for my husband’s Parkinson’s disease . Have to back off and care for myself as it is taking over my life.

[@ygm_dom6702]

I did this too took care of my husband...worked when the carer vame to help....raised 2 grandchildren and a year before my husband passed I got cancer. I have been fighting it for 4 years now and am not oit of the woods yet. Be careful with all the stress it will kill you

[@dorothyannan8184]

For better for worse.Love is everything we need

[@ronaldnock9666]

May everyone be healthy!

[@NancyRode-u9i]

❤🙏

[@flyfishing1776]

He just described every mother working 2 jobs. Blessings on these Hero Mothers

[@cynthiacordell4639]

This really resonates with me. When i realized that there was no end point to listening to mostly family members and their complaints, i shut it down. After decades of making decisions based on the needs and wants of everybody but myself, i ended it. This did change my personality in some ways but i have no regrets. The health problems brought on by being a sponge are being addressed but the damage is already done.

[@OregonGypsy.]

Same.

[@darcysgurl]

My mother had all of these characteristics, she had RA , sjoren syndrome , SLE , and in her last 2 years of life autoimmune hepatitis.. I lost her this February, I wish I had more time with her to give back her love and care ... she was an amazing woman .. beautiful soul

[@SlothsDontLie]

🫂

[@lislelisle5453]

Omg! This is my mother inlaw. I'm trying so hard to help her subtlety. I didn't understand her ways until I got a little wiser. This brought a tear to my eyes.

[@fearlesssacredfool]

Yes my mother in law too 😢 she has lupus. She just suffered a stroke. And she’s very weak. Wish they could understand what they’re doing to themselves so they could heal. 🙏🏽💞

[@dd-pm9cg]

You must be very humble to say this. Every man will not be like you. It needs greater humility and honesty to support for what's right even if it's not ours. My respect and love to you 🙏

[@AmtulAzeem-fh6jt]

Tears in my eyes...great respect for this doctor...May God protect him... He speaks the truth...always...

[@antine1279]

This made me cry. Fuck.

[@jlynngambler]

@@antine1279 💝

[@immane75]

me too.

[@Hair-Extraordinaire]

Me too

[@corilori99]

😩😭 coming from someone who suffers from multiple autoimmune diseases. I am working on setting healthy boundaries and putting myself first.

[@fornlike]

​@@corilori99I wish you will find a solution.

[@ra7e]

I'm sadder now... thinking of my late mother. She was the kind, dutiful daughter, loving mother and everyone's caretaker. After she left, our small family, her siblings everything unravelled. The care that small woman had for us was super-human. But, knowing this now... makes me regret not being strong enough to shoulder her responsibilities which shouldn't have been hers to begin with. 💔

[@roxyelliott9146]

Don't be sad love, you didn't know any different. Just be happy you had a gorgeous mumma 🥰🥰

[@doanphuong1325]

@@roxyelliott9146yes ❤

[@archanabhardwaj6348]

Same with my mom !! She is an overgiver ❤ i learnt this so early on . Dad cheated on her because she always cooked , cleaned helping evryone . My dad took her for granted . She got so hurt after betrayal. I decided i will never be like my mom . Niceness gets you used women. Put yourself first. Dont clean cook for a guy . Unless you married and even after that. Stack your money and live fr yourself ❤

[@Kathy-qu8zj]

My mama too, died at 51 after an 11 month horrendous journey. Was betrayed m By my dad, she had 3 small children, had to declare bankruptcy at 24 and divorced my dad. He didn’t pay child support. She married a man that had custody of his 4 kids.. they had one child together. They had a fabulous relationship and my childhood was pretty good after she remarried. She did everything for everyone, and he was a huge help. But she worked outside the home and her work didn’t end when she cam me home. I miss her so much…

[@jgm33884]

You are a compassionate person.

[@e.b.4379]

This describes me to a T. Always carrying the world on my shoulders since a very young age, assuming responsibility for everything and everyone and internalising experiences and trauma because I neither wanted to be a burden nor did I wish to be seen as a victim/weak but someone with great strength and resilience. I've practiced stoicism my entire life but all this came at the cost of being diagnosed with SLE 13 years ago and 2 years ago I was diagnosed with stage 3 cardia-gastric cancer. I'm a mere shell of my former self and as my time is running out, I'm spending it in solitude. Many highly sensitive people develop both auto-immune diseases as well as gut issues and in severe cases like mine, cancers of the digestive system. I'd caution people to not go down the same route. It's okay to ask for help, to acknowledge feeling weak/sad/angry etc. by expressing these emotions. Don't allow all of your pain, anger and trauma to fester inside your body because they'll most certainly manifest in physical form. It may be too late for me now but not for you so please make changes today. Love yourself and always prioritise yourself because the only person who's guaranteed to always be by your side until your very last breath is you. You are your own best friend and should be the hero in your own story. I hope my message reaches at least one person...

[@Rare-Jewels99]

Hi, im sorry to hear you are going through so much suffering. I will pray for in my daily prayers. Wishing you all the best ❤

[@krisborden9092]

Prayers for yourhealing and all of us going through this...I'm just putting it together these past 3yrs..finding out I have thyroid and hoshimottos added to nodules they want biopsies of...then 6months ago my sle was positive along with 2other antibodies..went to my rheumatologist appt today after waiting months and the doc had left sick..not wanting to put his autoimmune patients at risk ..he made special appts for today's most needed so I see him next Thursday hopefully ....I'm nervous ...I've had some tragic things happen over the past 15yrs and and the way I handled things with trying to take so much on myself ...I pray God points me in the right direction and pray he sends healing your way..he can do all..we just need to keep our faith ..

[@christyS.898]

Sending prayers 🙏🏼🩷 you are a kind person.❤

[@mindkindmom]

Agree. It's a pity many of us realize this when our health gives out. Sending prayers and best wishes.

[@SJ-db1lh]

True about HSP, there are more of us than not out there! Seems to be a pre-requisite for autoimmunes! Keep your head high, you matter more than you know. Prayers for your healing! 💜🙏

[@KristaJacobsen]

This is the second time hearing this doctor. Both times blown away with his insight and gentleness when imparting information.

[@MisssMolly]

Makes so much sense! This also applies to my depressions. Once I learned that I am important TOO, setting healthy boundaries and setting a rule of equal give-and-take - reciprocation - in relationships with others, my world changed because my health improved, both physically and mentally. It’s not easy because most likely you will lose people, friends or family members. But that’s okay, because they already were the ones disrespecting you and your boundaries, they already were the ones expecting you to give so they could take from you. Life is all about a healthy balance in every aspect of your life 💞💫

[@Fatedstars17]

Happened to me. Long term Fight or flight response from abusive partner gave me thyroid disease, very high blood pressure and heart issues at 32

[@PaulaP3964]

I can relate to this because I am 58 with 2 autoimmune disorders and that description is, for me, almost spot on.

[@adriannemalden8668]

Yup, my roommate swears by fight n flight aggressor with thyroid!!

[@krisborden9092]

Same hear...my oldest went through addiction then a divorce and now have hoshimotto thyroiditis along with nodules I have to have biopsies and couple months ago my test for lupus was 1.320..apparently high so now waiting for the rheumatologist to tell me where I go from here...am trying diet..vitamins..anything to help me get better...

[@liscel3556]

Yes exactly high blood pressure I feel like I'm literally dying and it's just like I just I usually don't comment on the comments in other words I will you know put a thumbs up and stuff but I'm saying yes exactly it's like I feel the same way my heart is like you know lots of stuff anyway God bless you and I got to I have to make sure that I hear this again because I need to hear this every day anyway been watching KZbin lately I watch you know certain things and whatever but the thing is as a person who always put others first but then have been with a man whose abusive well I've been with a man for 35 years he always was abusive but really bad lately but the thing is I realized that I've literally been killing myself and it's just so hard you know anyway I'm sorry if I'm saying too much anywhere talking to much I'm usually again I don't usually because you know I mean well because I have a husband and he will not let me talk to anybody and not even let me have a girlfriend or a friend anyway but also because you know I just put I realizeso much stuff going on with me and I just came across this my mom my I meant to say my daughter always sent me about Mel Robbins but now she won't talk to me because that's a whole another issue just because later on in life her dad you know my husband he you know it was like he just you know there was no it really did hit on something and sorry I made such a long text I usually don't do that but anyway God bless and God bless you and hope for everything good for you

[@Skyblue-js4th]

@krisborden9092 I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's at age 30. I used acupuncture and TCM to fix it. Only took a few sessions. I also learnt what caused it in my life. 20 years later, ​it hasn't come back. Good luck!

[@phillipaoakes-white5796]

I see myself in this - single mother working two jobs there was no time for me and I still, genuinely, don't know how i could provide for and raise my boys, look after our animals any other way. Diagnosed with MS in 2019. My boys have left home and I now have 1 job and whilst on Ocrevus live symptom free. I now take care of my diet, exercise, sleep and workload.

[@shaheev8011]

Until I read Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, I never could understand my toxic relationship with myself, my family, and others. Now, I am making choices that benefit me and tell people "no." Coming across this video was no accident. It is a wake up call for a positive change!

[@taramceown2919]

I’m going to get that book!!!thanks!

[@shaheev8011]

@taramceown2919 You're welcome. I hope it helps.

[@nelialerios8222]

THANK YOU I WILL GET THAT ONE TOO!

[@fakofako444]

I need this book🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️. 😂

[@javireyes7333]

@@fakofako444 me too

[@moragmacgregor6792]

Dr Maté is so awesome. I admire and respect him so much. It would be amazing to know him as a friend.

[@emilyfarris3510]

Truth. I was diagnosed with Graves Disease. I was really sick. I lost weight, had thyroid storms. Lost everything. I was a School Resource Officer and was taking care of my sick Mother. I was stressed to the max.

[@Kathy-qu8zj]

@@emilyfarris3510 I had Graves too. Started shortly after giving birth to my son and was married to a covert narcissist.. takes a real toll and you don’t even realize what’s happening at the time. Hind sir is 20/20

[@aeiou0123]

@@Kathy-qu8zji got graves too. How r u doing now? Are you in remission yet?

[@Kathy-qu8zj]

@ Yes, but I opted to take radioactive iodine instead of the surgical route.. ended up taking it 3 different times, had to wait one year in between times to give it time to “kill” parts of my thyroid gland. It was too long to get it under control, but now taking Levothyroxin to bring it up because I ended up with Hypothyroidism after. It’s always in the normal zone when tested. For those that have had a thyroid condition, if you want to become pregnant make sure you have your dr. test you for a type of antibody that one out of 10 women with the condition may have that causes the fetus to have thyrotoxemia.. basically Graves’ disease in the womb, which some states do not require testing since thyroid disease isn’t common there. The Midwest is called “the goiter belt” because thyroid issues occur much more there than the rest of the country. I lived in Wyoming when I was pregnant with my 2nd baby, they did not require the test and I was clueless about it. Turned out I had the antibody left over even tho MY thyroid condition was under control. I went into premature labor because my baby had a way to high thyroid hormone( basically Graves’ disease), I was choppers on a flight for life to a Women’s hospital in Denver where he was born and they could better care for him. His heart rate was way too high, and he had a lot of problems from the condition and premature birth. Once he was born, the antibodies eventually subsided and his thyroid level became normal. He almost died, it was touch and go for awhile. He weight 3 lbs and 4 oz.. body was shutting down because he was fighting the respirator. He has learning disabilities and is 36 and lives with us still. Love him very much.. but Mebe my story will keep It from happening to someone else.

[@user-vz1cf5hd2z]

I was diagnosed with Graves too in my early 30s. Hope you guys are all doing OK it really takes a toll on ones mental health too I still can't get use to the physical changes and don't think I ever will

[@emilyfarris3510]

@user-vz1cf5hd2z I hope you are doing well too. 🌻

[@jayjasjoe]

This made me cry. I have an auto immune disease- lichen planus . He described me in 4 sentences. Unfortunately very few understands the underrated women.

[@paulalane8638]

Described me exactly! Having all kinds of issues after 58 years taking care of people who did not care.

[@worldpeace8187]

Ditto

[@susievidal4134]

​@@worldpeace8187yes me too 😢

[@maryshannon3326]

Me too. Exactly. Time to put ourselves and our health first.

[@karenmariecraig5619]

OMG. You described me perfectly. I do so much for others that I am exhausted.

[@vanessalivengood3223]

He is Totally nail on the head. 100% Correct !! I did All 4. And I was diagnosed with Graves Diseases 18 years ago. And then of course treated.

[@tinaflo7118]

Well sir you just described me, I'm 59 still like this

[@charsiu_808]

He described me too...but I don't have autoimmune disease

[@rosemariepejooh197]

He descibed me too….Just turned 67 omg😮 really glad I have my Belguim Malinois since July alot of work very rewarding such a kind soul.

[@maryshannon3326]

Me too, but working on putting myself and my health first now.

[@deborahmannino3775]

I'm 74 and I'm everything he said.

[@michelehendriks5686]

I developed myasthenia gravis, a neurological disease of muscle weakness, by the time i was 21. He is so right. It woke me up to my own needs, because now i had no choice. Luckily it was gone after 3 years, but at 33, i am still a recovering people pleaser, and learning to love and take care of myself. From when i was a little girl i have been so out of touch with what i was feeling. Now when i try to listen to myself, my wants and needs, it stays silent. I just dont know. Its like its a language i dont speak yet. But also i am lucky enough that i do have a few magical experiences of how it feels to be in connection with myself, with others and with nature. So i keep believing, listening and learning the language. And i am practicing to lead with love, every day, with both others and myself. ♥️ Thank you so much Mel for your videos. You are a light in my life ♥️✨🙏🏼

[@lindavenport9788]

Your comment is poignant & intensely describes what the struggle for clarity & self love feels like. Sending healing energy ✨💚✨

[@AlanaMorris-z4o]

Probably the greatest doctor alive. He’s absolutely brilliant! Must read, enough said.

[@SueP-jg9vx]

its the gut microbiome and its relationship to estrogen. gimme a break

[@salaahkhayr2398]

Or just another liberal feminist who’s being paid to get responsibilities away from women in the era where rights have always been achieved for the most part and now women are facing equal responsibilities

[@salaahkhayr2398]

Or just another liberal feminist who’s being paid to get responsibilities away from women in the era where rights have always been achieved for the most part and now women are facing equal responsibilities

[@Skyblue-js4th]

​@@SueP-jg9vxtwo things can be true at the same time. Gimme a break.

[@Aroeup]

My mother has MS. She's covert narcissist. This let me have insight into why she's all out of compassion. She burnt it all up. Thank you so much.

[@simi6152]

I work in a field where that's all we do. As I'm getting older I finally realized that my needs come first and then I can help others. I'm glad that I discovered this before it was too late. Now i'm in a happier place in my life.

[@Elikimani8407]

This put tears in my eyes its true am suffering with autoimmune disease which has no cure ,putting other peoples lives first for the last 20 years OMG 😱

[@queens6583]

Same!

[@WriterDreams44]

Anyone tick all four and have an autoimmune disorder? I do. My body punished me because I couldn't stop and care for me at any point in my life and no one else ever did even when I was a child, because I couldn't help but help others. I paid the price for my shortcomings of kindness and consideration of others and THAT is why I am so mad or heartbroken when people in my life try to erase those sacrifices they refuse to believe I give. If they knew what it cost me they'd not take that too from me. We are also then left to deal with the health reunifications alone often told the pain is nothing we are just weak. Dude.....they have no clue how strong we actually are to be alive and still want to help others despite how people treat us.

[@ritaauld3331]

Me! This is actually me in a nutshell.I have ITP where my immune system kills off my healthy platelets by mistake which causes bleeding, thin blood and bruising.

[@RocoNGizmo]

Me too 😢😢😢

[@segwrites]

So perfectly said. 🫂 And I’m right there with you. This made me crack. I hit all four markers, but was made to believe I was and still am selfish by my family of origin. And they wonder why I barely (if ever) talk to any of them….

[@naomireid8833]

So very very true. God have mercy on us. I'm very grateful for this short. It's so helpful and comforting. Taking care of myself these days and shutting them out.

[@ritaauld3331]

@@segwrites Distance yourself from negative people. Even if they're family. They are bad for our health.

[@k.h.8897]

Spot on. My mother always shamed my anger and always put herself last which in the long run poisoned our whole family.

[@변에리-g6m]

Hearing this broke my heart. The worst part is knowing the damage is already done and you can't go back and change. Whom do I blame for this? I feel resentment towards the ones who made me become who I am, I was a child that took responsibility for a family of six emotionally for over a decade. How do I get my life back, how do I get my health back? They are all healthier than me

[@cheryldurham3560]

I have several autoimmune disorders and have spent my life battling these. This man just described me . At 75 I am still doing what I have always done but now my family is so large I don’t feel I have true peace at all.

[@denisericcardi4902]

I have recently been diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis, celiac and most recently Graves disease. I’m a mom of 3, my son has diabetes and addisons so I’m perpetually stressed about him and my oldest who is estranged d/t her father and stepmoms influence. Oh and I’m a nurse. The whole thing is a set for disaster. Just recently started to focus on me. It’s soooo hard but I’m tired of my body constantly being attacked 😰

[@nevenaschofer9991]

Read Anthony WIlliam!

[@ValSMITH-it4lg]

Dearheart, can you find even a few minutes a day for yourself? Maybe driving to and from work, put on YOUR favorite songs and sing along. Find some joy somewhere. I did and it saved my life. God bless you.

[@angelagrant2943]

Dear sister ❤️ God bless you ❤️

[@amparofigueroa419]

We can and must start paying g atte tion to what our bodies and brain tell us--- but we are caretakers and it's why wo.en are rearing most of our children BECAUSE OUR CHILDREN AND FAMILIES DEPEND ON US TO STAY STRONG BUTT THAT MEANS TAKING CARE OF NUMBER ONE! HIW DO WE STOP?

[@grabby7667]

Fix your gut microbiome!

[@ziggystardust3060]

This made me cry even before Gabor finished what he was saying, because instantly I knew! This is my life story! 😭 I'm in my late 60's and the weight of the world is on my shoulders, since life has always been incredibly hard on me for as long as I can remember. Certainly since early childhood, and all through the growing years. I have several autoimmune diseases, and other serious health conditions, but my children don't know that. I pretend everything's ok, and I'm still working full time on night shifts like there's no tomorrow.. God help me. I'm so alone. 😭😭😭

[@thefunkysway4634]

I hear so many women with the same or similar story. Yet, we are not alone. How can we be when so many of us identify. We are not alone. We just need to find each other. ❤😊

[@UssiTheGrouch]

Just breathe. You can choose to not be alone.

[@Xianne027]

Me too! 😢

[@martincameron772]

I’m really sorry & I can relate: my mom as a nurse died on her birthday in 2021. It was not overly surprising, so I had an idea of all the drugs she was on from big pharma 😐 & they got what they wanted, death. I live in Canada, Saskatchewan Love & blessings, ma. See ya soon ❤

[@martincameron772]

So, you’re in your 60s and you’re working full-time, or part-time, which is still commendable. You are also still moving which is great. I assume that your children or at least young adults and hopefully they are enjoying their careers. Love and blessings to them and to you. I just do not follow the rhetoric. Best ❤

[@KA-ui3sm]

Yes! Am part of the 80%. Was diagnosed 3 yrs ago but started getting sick way before I was diagnosed. This was a wake up call for me to start putting myself first. It’s a constant uphill battle becos of how this is deeply ingrained in women and our society.

[@tortugalisa4748]

This makes so much sense when you have autoimmune diseases and carry a very empathetic soul. I know! This doc is spot on 💯

[@JNPeace-ct2qf]

I am now learning to take care of myself. I have autoimmune. He speaks the truth.

[@elizabeth_likemercury]

I'm in the 80 percent as well. Diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer at 27, thankfully been in remission since 2004. This diagnosis was my first wake-up call to take care of myself. I say first because I fell back into the unhealthy pattern more than once since then.

[@Neverland4747]

As a Lupus sufferer, I can completely relate. The Dr. Is correct

[@joyfuljennifer4125]

Learning to release anger in a healthy way!

[@whatsleft100]

My dad has always released anger my mum didn't . She's dead ,he is the healthiest member of his family . Theres def something in this !!!

[@whatsleft100]

However we all walked on eggshells so it wasnt a "healthy" anger release but it was a release .

[@joyfuljennifer4125]

@whatsleft100 and to be able to release it...awe...so needed and deserved ✨️🙌🏻🙏🏻✨️

[@joyfuljennifer4125]

@whatsleft100 I believe the anger turned within turns into illness or worse. This I know to be true. I have been pushing out anger emotions "old guck," Built-up anger turns into dis ease in the body this I know because it happened to me and now I'm very aware of what I think say and do! It's changed everything! You can change from the inside out I'm proof!

[@geetachaurasia6992]

You are 100%, correct. I am a woman suffering from autoimmune condition and have all the qualities mentioned by you.

[@hannahn7375]

I am so grateful to learn this in my mid30s. I'm so done with taking care of others at my own expense.

[@victoriagonzalez7968]

This is absolutely true. As a sufferer of RA, I found myself doing exactly what he described until I couldn't do it anymore. Now, I am unemployed, lost my home and almost lost my mind. Stay healthy.

[@rachelparrott9332]

This doctor is a very wise man , makes so much sense 👏

[@lottielane2486]

Dr. Gabor Mate hitting it out of the park again.!❤

[@cynthiasmith306]

He hits major home runs , runs all the bases, and walks back to the home plate with ease! Not even out of breath! 🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿

[@dixiehuston4869]

How can women reverse this

[@lottielane2486]

​@@dixiehuston4869become self aware to start with. Are you a people pleaser ? Have you been brought up to put others first. Are you insecure. Do you need other folks approval. And so on. If yes to any or all, this indicates you are likely to do as Mate has described. Put everyone else before yourself. And possibly pay for it later. Read all the comments on here. Many women have only taken affirmative action when it's almost too late, in their 60.s and 70,s when they decided enough was enough. So, start early, . This can't be achieved through legislation. It is up to each of us to become aware . Aware of our weaknesses, and our strengths. If you catch yourself always saying yes, when you mean no. Always feeling responsible for others happiness, or state of mind. These are Red flags, and show you could be susceptible. In the end, we all have to learn this lesson.

[@lunakitty8533]

I have 2 autoimmune diseases and you have just described my entire life. To a very unhealthy extent I have been a people pleaser. Always trying to keep the peace and everyone happy.

[@carissa813]

So many women I know are suffering this way. Life sat me on my butt back in 2019 and it saved me from going down the same path. While it's good to help and care for people we have to take care of ourselves first! I literally have peers who have cancer, thyroid issues, and have even died all because of stress and pressure from family. None of us have reached the age of 40 yet!

[@ArolynnSmith]

Three out of 4 is my issue! I learn from Therapy! I can't save the 🌎 I can only take care of myself. I have done so much & I am not doing it anymore. Not cooking for Thanksgiving dinner I can't eat any of it. I stopped this a few yrs. ago! I am proud of myself!🙏🏽

[@stupensardi2783]

Well done you.

[@thehappysheep2023]

I'm proud of you too.

[@buggybunny8890]

Keep putting you first. Self love is not selfless. Proud of you 💯

[@a.a.3699]

I had my 1st Crohn’s attack at age 30 after dealing with major relationship drama that was upending our whole household. At 40 I was in a similar boat and it flared up and I lost a foot of my intestines. It’s like my body had to do something, anything, to remove me from the endless fight or flight response that was being triggered in my life.

[@marytucker9533]

I love this man - a real gift to humanity

i wish you and other ppl would also say that of all the indian gurus, yogis, swamis who have taught the west and the world how to take care of themself by the many kind of yoga's they have teached and by the hindu religion they have teached.

[@marytucker9533]

How do you know we don’t?

[@salaahkhayr2398]

Or just another liberal feminist who’s being paid to get responsibilities away from women in the era where rights have always been achieved for the most part and now women are facing equal responsibilities

[@Notmyrealname2007]

After hearing this, I can recall a conversation I had with my mom recently about a rash that I broke out in on just my hands one other part of my body. Is rash comes and goes and she said you're too stressed you need to calm down. My job is a stressful one in my life is horribly stressful now with health issues. So what he said hits home. I started developing autoimmune issues in the last 15 years. It's been extremely stressful for me.

[@danapnmk]

I always suffered when I said goodbye to my babies to go to work. I then decided to stay at home for a few years. The children then went to kindergarten at the age of 4 and I always adjusted my working hours so that the more time they were out of the house, the more time I was out of the house. Today I have a fantastic, close relationship with my children. They look after me, I am important to them.

[@patriotOps7]

Truth be told, we just don't take that moment to center and have that self awareness (usually because we are so busy and overload ed taking care of others) but we really can't take care of anyone effectively if we dont take care of #1. Use your words to get what you need, delegate to family members if you need help, and make sure the kids have an organized "helping list" and that they're aware they need to pitch in. Love yourself and your family enough to implement change. Start self care TODAY. ❤

[@imjustjules]

Not me developing Graves’ Disease after being a therapist and having to leave the field as I went on to develop more chronic illness. Quite literally my role was about self sacrifice. Sending so much compassion and care to all providers out there, women / AFAB, and anyone regardless of gender identity with chronic illness and trauma. This is a tough world to live in.

[@CheleN-n6t]

Please listen ... family of origin. We aren't responsible for what was done to us, but we are for what we do for ourselves once we become aware of what has happened. Praise God that there are resources out there for healing.

[@judystaab7126]

Would like to know them..

[@deborahjohnson9877]

@@judystaab7126regular exercise that you somewhat enjoy is a great first step. Endorphins, seeing other people doing the same thing to strengthen their bodies. It helps me care for myself physically and mentally. Healthy body, healthy mind.

[@deborahjohnson9877]

@@judystaab7126regular exercise helps me. Seeing other people who also exercise regularly helps you learn their values. Healthy body, healthy mind.

[@pilula65]

Yes!! To all of it!! Thank you. Time to take care of ourselves.

[@annjames1837]

What a cold world it would be if women weren't nurturing and empathic 😢

[@juliehiggins6466]

Being married to a narcissist for 34yrs and having fibromyalgia seems to go hand in hand. Divorcing him and having the most amazing glow up of my life at age 52 without trying is the most fabulous side effect of divorce 🥰🙏

[@issaextras6549]

This is so true. I recognise myself in that description.

[@zipsteri]

Women's future is humanity's future. So why? Something's very wrong. Just look around! We're becoming fake and going away from nature.

[@kateshort5658]

Agree with every point. Dear Mate, he needs to be listened to by younger generations to make appropriate and timely adjustments for a healthy life

[@michelehendriks5686]

Meh, that would have been too late for me. I am 33 now and my mission is to break the generational trauma cycle of people pleasing and being a healthy guide and role model for my children

[@Itzanunnya2019]

Yea..... Cancer x3 before the age of 33. Non genetic...... The chronic buffer, wave smoother,..... Now, at 57 yrs...... I'm not a band-aid. Buffer, healer, or reality check. NO CONTACT. LIFETIME. ❤

[@TeeKing]

Having lived with lupus for decades while teaching school and being a foster parent to many children, this rings the bell of epiphany for me.

[@beckykrick6108]

YES..AMEN..TRUE..WE NEED TO LISTEN TO THIS!!! AMEN...

[@JuneHiscox]

EXACTLY , sooo true, it's good to be honest, equal and fair with oneself,

[@bianchaesson1441]

It's actually a spiritual responsibility. Once I learned that, it made my 'daily repair' attempts a lot lot easier!!!! Phew!!!!🧐😇