A Panic Attack Ended My Winter Backpacking Trip

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Hiking and backpacking almost always help with my mental health - but as this video shows, sometimes even the usual stuff doesn't work, and it's okay to change plans. 💚If you are dealing with anxiety, depression, or any other mental health stuff, you aren't alone. Big love to all of you!!

[@Tcrowe406]

As someone who struggles with depression and anxiety I felt this video! Thank you for sharing. The stigma is real! Much love

[@tabiblue2804]

My mental health gets in the way of so many things in my life including being outdoors, even when being outdoors helps my mental health more most times. It is hard for the people in my life to understand that juxtaposition of feelings. I try to rationalize myself out of those feelings more often than not and have had to end things that I really wanted early and unexpectedly. These moments almost alway inherently make me feel like a failure. I know that is not true, but wrestling with that feeling and having to change course and frequently inconvenience the other people in my life even if that inconvenience isn't a burden to them it bring a lot of guilt with it for me. Thank you for showing what you did in this video. You are and always have been absolutely amazing.

[@JosephineG101]

Thank you for sharing Miranda. Very powerful and there's nothing wrong with changing your mind. That's a strong decision at a difficult time.

[@pyronymph-868]

I am so glad you decided to share this with us! I deal with anxiety and depression and have wondered what I would do if I had a panic attack on trail. I haven't backpacked in nearly 2 decades, have chronic health issues, but desperately need to get out hiking before it's too late and I kick the bucket. Dr has ok'd me, restricted by my symptoms (take it easier when having symptoms), so no medical reason not to. There's a tiny (68mi) through hike from my town to the coast I want to attempt. Your video showed me that listening to my body includes my mental health. Having a model of a choice someone dealing with mental health issues like mine made, models alternatives where my brain got stuck.

[@markbegay7163]

Thank you 🙏

[@mygenericlogon]

As a current therapist treating teens with anxiety, depression and self harm, thank you to the moon and back for normalizing we can experience intensity AND we can take care of ourselves. I appreciate you being vulnerable and honest with your audience. You were inspiring before and even more so, now. Many hugs!!

[@Sandra-dt4ec]

As a fellow therapist and backpacker I wholeheartedly endorse this comment!

[@isaacgushue2957]

There's nothing wrong with bailing if you need to. If you're not enjoying yourself, or you don't feel safe, definitely don't feel like you need to stay or try to tough it out. Nobody should feel they need to stay out another night just to prove something.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

100% this! Safety and happiness is always most important. Your reason for turning back doesn't need to be anything big.

[@jasonwilson4185]

Technical divers have a rule, that should be adopted more widely. Anyone, at any time, can cancel a dive, and nobody gets to question it. Safety, safety, safety.@@MirandaGoesOutside

[@d.2110]

are you dependent on each other during a dive? @@jasonwilson4185

[@kmetz878]

I agree! Always have a way to bail if you need to, and "need to" can be as simple as "I'm really not feeling this today".

[@pithon3d477]

​@@jasonwilson4185This is a fact ... Fellow tech diver.

[@DadManHiking]

First off: Rainer, we see you! We know you’re not just a voice behind the camera! You’re an integral part to this channel, and whenever we see Miranda, we’re doing so through your eyes, so to speak. Second: Miranda, thank you for having the courage to share this with us. I’ve been dealing with anxiety & ADD (both undiagnosed for first 40+ years of my life), and I know what it’s like just not be able get your brain to tell your hands what they need to do. Sometimes it takes a lot of courage to do what you need to do take care of yourself. And I’m glad Ranier was there with you. Thank you for being honest with yourself and us. Lastly: man, I wouldn’t be able to go out in the cold like that. Not. At. All. Forever impressed by the people who can do that 😊. Love to you both, B.

[@camero220]

Yesssss these are the most important hiking videos! We have enough of the “ultralight on an unlimited budget with no time restriction” videos. Hiking isn’t exclusively about covering yourself in dirt and walking until your toenails fall off. It’s whatever you make it. Life happens. Hike your hike. Help a friend. Live to fight another day. Thank you Miranda and Rainer!

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Thank you ❤️ I couldn't have said it better myself - hiking is whatever you make it!

[@vanomadcyclist3474]

Loved this video, loved your honesty to openly discuss mental health. Good for you Miranda for listening to your body and good for you Rainer for supporting her decision. 😊😊😊

[@camero220]

@@MirandaGoesOutside exactly! I think this is your most important video since either of the two original ones with Pam. (Especially the flat trail Florida hiking video IIRC) Even with their being 8 billion+ of us out there, everyone has a hike or terrain for them. Backpacking ≠ summiting Everest. Taking a walk in the woods or wheelchair-ing around the block, it’s just about going outside.

[@katherinefrost5808]

Thank you, Miranda. As a retired Army nurse, I struggle with PTSD, anxiety and depression. The outdoors is my sanctuary, but sometimes it can also trigger my anxiety. Knowing when to practice self-care and take a knee is difficult, but it is also very crucial. Thank you for sharing your story. You are not alone.

[@stitch3163]

Bless you, Rainer.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

He's the real deal 💚

[@qakbot100]

You do know that the whole community is waiting for the big day right?

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

😆 wouldn't THAT be a big video...

[@qakbot100]

@@MirandaGoesOutside hint hint?

[@pedroclaro7822]

Could do wonders for your mental health 😂

[@Divarenee]

I just watched this with my 12.5 year old daughter who has difficulty with overnights. We both were glad you made the right choice for yourself. My daughter said she could really relate, and I could too. Thank you for sharing this.

[@theroadhome_Liz_Summers]

I am 68 ... when I was young, I could not do sleepovers. I called my parents several times to pick me up. We did not have a name for this, then. So grateful to hear that you and your daughter are understanding the issues!! Best, best wishes.

[@conradjordan1222]

This is the most important & hiking video ever made. People all over the world have similar experiences like this every day. But they think they’re alone in it because others aren’t brave enough to show what it’s like when things don’t go to plan. You two are amazing!!

[@vc5213]

100%. I had never heard anyone talk about having a panic attack while backpacking before so I felt like it was only me.

[@hannahcollins1816]

Honestly, what an amazing person Rainer is. Awesome to have that excellent support!! Thanks for sharing this with us, Miranda ❤ I always appreciate the realness and authenticity we get from you guys. I also love that Tucker seemed like he knew you needed a cuddle at the end 🥺

[@Eventurlivet]

Whoah! Just realised - that time when I stopped in a middle of a hike and asked myself «why am I here?» and didn’t manage to go on, I wasn’t being lazy! I have pushed it down as a failed trip, when me turning around was actually me listening to myself saying «hey - go home and rest!» Thanks, Miranda!

[@ejcastro9518]

Knowing when to turn back might be more important than pushing on. I wish more ppl listened to their bodies. There'd be a lot less tragedies if they did. Too many KZbinrs push the bounds of safety and it bothers me. I look forward to your next adventure. Thanks for sharing 👍

[@Drmikekuna]

As a retired mental health professional I want to say Thank You! When well known individuals admit to mental health issues it makes it OK for others to seek help. Great job!

[@DadManHiking]

Yes! And there’s still a lot of stigma surrounding mental health. There needs to be a lot more education & openness about it.

[@georgescofieldtt207]

🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@meursaultscourtroom8886]

Thank you Rainer for treating Miranda's panic attack with care and keeping it non-judgmental. Part of panic and anxiety is worrying about how other people with perceive us.

[@juniper1girl]

Thank you for being this open and honest. Not many youtubers upload video's that aren't 'perfect'. Going out there and getting back early, is better then not going out at all. Living with mental health problems sucks. Especially when you can't see it from the outside. I hope how this trip ended doesn't discourage you in any way to get out there again. You are awesome Miranda.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Thank you! 💚 I hope people see this and realize that this, while disappointing, is normal and okay. You know I'll be back out soon!!

[@scetis]

I didn’t expect to be wiping tears out of my eyes at the end of a Miranda video… thank you so much for sharing all of yourself with us- we just respect you more! And Rainer, you’re a great friend…

[@markrico1917]

The part where you said "I hope there's somebody out there who feels seen" was massively important. Thank you for sharing reality and truth.

[@scottcampbell96]

Sometimes, I have to remind myself that it’s okay when I don’t have all the answers and I don’t know how to move forward. It happens to everyone. Some hide it well, but everyone has doubts. Thank you for sharing, Miranda. This is part of your journey and your honesty is what I appreciate about you.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Thank you ❤️ ❤️

[@margaretdabrush3032]

My Mom side is SO PROUD of you. My teacher side is EVEN MORE proud of you. I hope that does not sound condescending, it is in no way meant to be. I try to balance teaching my own offspring and students the need to "do hard things" that might end with results we do not want, then trying that again, with doing what we need to do to be safe mentally and physically. We do not talk about mental health enough in the US. When we try to have those conversations, people so often shut down, or feel like a failure for struggling, or feel like they should not burden anyone else with their truths. I thank you, from the bottom of my heart for sharing all of this with such honesty. Thank you for having this conversation with a gazillion strangers on the internet. I love this channel because you are always blunt, honest, and truthful. (And you often make me crack up, too- not this time, as is appropriate). In seeing your lead up to the panic attack, I saw a lot of me. I pretend I am not having panic attacks and usually deflect. So a final HUGE thank you, as a flawed human trying her best, for the large mirror you help up to me and the work I still need to do with my own mental well being. The internet is a better place because you are on it, please know that.

[@christopherpike8269]

I am glad Rainer was there to give you a hug. Sometimes words are not what is needed. Just having someone there for support and a simple hug can allow you to release that anxiety and emotions. Thank you for sharing this aspect of your life.

[@jenjaynes8863]

I don't even have panic attacks, and watching you snowshoe while pulling the sled and desperately searching for a campsite on a deadline made me feel like one was coming on. I'm so glad you were able to go home and care for yourself.

[@Trumkin42]

As a person with a generalized anxiety disorder diagnosis and probably some other undiagnosed issues this has got to be one of the most validating things I've seen. Shoutout to Rainer for his support, I am a bit jealous of that.

[@jerrypritchett283]

As someone who has never had these conditions, it is hard to understand what people who do go through. I can empathize and sympathize but never fully grasp the effect it has. I do think it is important that someone like you make these authentic videos to help the rest of us to get a better understanding.

[@gregkosinski2303]

I used to experience severe panic attacks. It really sucks but it’s not the end of the world. They have medications that can nuke most people’s symptoms

[@adrians7358]

It's just the way your brain reacts sometimes. For me the first time it happened it was while driving after a couple of bad nights sleep and long distance driving several days a week. Hasn't happened since, but I will say this, after it happens once, you just feel it coming way ahead in other situations. In general for me it is when I am tired and/or cold (like way out in the middle of nowhere and cold). It's a bit like you feel you're not in control, like it is a constant danger (not being very close to a place where you can feel safe or relax, and you really need that place at that exact moment). It starts slow (like occasional very short panic) and builds up. Whenever I feel this, I am always like okay I'll head back. No point in aggravating the situation. There is no logic in it, logic will not help. What helps is you returning to a point where you feel relaxed and safe.

[@NaughtAppealing]

It’s generous of you to want to understand. 👍

[@anahidelrio5003]

I appreciate that you called this listening to your body... mental health and physical health are one in the same, and I have found that treating mental health as you would a physical injury makes the most sense (for patience with yourself, for recognizing something needs to change, for learning how to avoid that injury or recover from another one in the future). Mad respect, Miranda

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Thank you so much 💚 I think you are so right - we pay attention to physical health and injury so carefully on trail, so doing the same thing for our mental health makes total sense too. Thank you for sharing this!

[@sherryzee2634]

Nothing I love more than honesty. You are not the first backpacker I've seen "fess up". Takes guts! And, it's important for all of us to better understand ourselves and others. Rainer helped with his words of comfort. You helped by explaining what was happening to you and how to best resolve it - and allow that it was okay. Three cheers to the brave!!! You guys rock! It's your show gosh darn!!!

[@jefflea9239]

You are an amazing young woman, and I really enjoy your videos on hiking and backpacking. I'm 60 and have lived with chronic depression my entire adult life. It is a part of who I am, but it is not an obstacle to who I am. All the best, keep making your very good videos, and keep on hiking!!

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

I LOVE this: depression is a part of you, but not an obstacle. I often tell people that I don't suffer from depression, I live with it - it makes it feel more in control and okay with it. Thank you for watching! ❤️

[@sallys2423]

Yes! This. I live with depression and it does not define me, it is one of the challenges I have in my life.

[@drewsartsymom]

You and Rainer’s friendship is absolutely priceless! Thank you for sharing the good the bad and the ugly with us! Hugs to you!

[@LWilli5]

Thank you so much for having the courage to share the tough stuff. Thank you for not just showing the highlight reels. Thank you for being vulnerable. Thank you for being awesome. When you said, “I don’t know what to do”, I felt that with my whole heart. I have been in that space and it is awful, especially when someone else is along. Thank you, Rainer for being so understanding and so supportive. Sending my love to you both 🥰.

[@amynapier3551]

I wanted to give you a big hug. You are not alone. Thanks to Rainer for being so supportive.

[@canadakaren1131]

It’s people like you Miranda who are willing to put themselves out there that help lessen the stigma of mental health issues. Also having a wonderful understanding friend like Rainer is such an amazing treasure. No one knows what it’s like until you have experienced it and it’s not something you want anyone to experience. You will do it again when the time is right, we have no doubt. Big hugs 🤗

[@Pelagos1000]

Thank you for posting this video. As a 51 year old man, who has learned more than I ever wanted to about mental health in the last several years, including my own unexpected experiences with panic attacks, I really appreciate you posting this. There are times in our lives when we have to decide if it's best to "fake it" or pack it in, and fight another day. There is peace and wisdom in making the best choice.

[@laxd17]

Thank you for sharing this Miranda.

[@alexygoat8440]

I’m in healthcare, and a hiker. Thank you for helping to normalize what living with anxiety can bring. Hiking helped me crawl out of a deep anxious hole…. But can also challenge me, and so many. Thank you for being real . You’ve gained a lifelong follower

[@adventuresofaflatlander4188]

Thanks for being so open. Also, shout out to Rainer for being what you needed in that moment. My wife struggles with anxiety and it’s taken a lot of trial and error to learn how to respond to her panic attacks. I love seeing that you have that with a friend. I also need to shout out Tucker at the end there. Dogs just get it. We don’t deserve dogs

[@BronzeBellaBria]

you sound like a really supportive hubby/spouse

[@Erehw]

Support from the East Coast! Thank you for making this video Miranda. It speaks volumes about your character and your care for others.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Thank you - I hope it resonates with other folks going through something similar 💚

[@stephsheppard]

As someone who struggles enormously with panic attacks, depression, anxiety disorder, and PTSD - this video more than ANY of your others helped me. Thank you for being vulnerable with your bajillion subscribers - I feel SO seen, I feel stronger knowing I’m not the only one who struggles. 🖤.

[@stephaniejhdeppe8109]

This is probably one of the most important videos youve ever made. Thank you for your vulnerability and for showing something that many just dont talk about ❤

[@almashburn1770]

I think the last scene says it all, don't you wish we could all be the people our dogs think we are ? Thanks for being real, and making it OK to know when to say it's time to call it, and be safe.

[@WildMiranda]

Thank you Miranda for being real and showing every side of you❤ It means so so so much for me, another Miranda who struggles a ton with anxiety and depression. You are the biggest role model in my life. Thank you and take care❤️❤️ Life is just so extremely though.

[@LoveyBicki]

Honestly, I’m so appreciative of you sharing Miranda and being so incredibly vulnerable. As a person who has a lot of physical limitations and is very neurodivergent it’s refreshing to see someone be honest and open and not force themselves to do things that they aren’t comfortable with.

[@lizlydslids]

I also stopped a hike due to a panic attack (aided in part from getting lost and horrible weather) sometimes despite knowing exactly what we should be doing it's healthier for us to look after ourselves in environments that are more familier. Thanks for this video, you were really articulate about your emotions.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

I'm so sorry you went through this too, but thank you for sharing that! I agree - I can't say for certain that this *wouldn't* have happened in warm, easy conditions, but the winter and cold definitely made it worse. I'm glad I was in a spot where I could make this call.

[@ramonathemidwife7121]

As a woman who lives with depression and generalized anxiety disorder, I must say thank you for being real. I live vicariously thru youtube influencers like you who challenge themselves with outdoor adventures. Anxiety keeps me from walking outside and doing what you do. You are a brave woman to push through it and do what you love and even braver to know when to step back.

[@JamieHitt]

The strongest people I know all have the same things in common. They know their limitations. When they get overwhelmed, they assess the situation. And if they decide to call it, then they call ir. "Not today, boys!" is one of the most powerful and self-affirming staments you will ever say. It is a sign of strength, Miranda, ...not weakness. I know a thing or two about percerverence. And you perservered. You made the right decision toward the correst goal and went forrward with it. You are stronger than you think. Trust yourself. We all love you.

[@a.ramosakadrumgrl6677]

I’m glad that Rainer was with you and you weren’t completely solo! My child has panic attacks and I know I feel helpless when they are having one. If winter backpacking is not for you, it’s okay!

[@greebp4]

Happy you felt comfortable sharing that story. It takes strength to know when to push through and just as much to know when to call it.

[@valerielinares2068]

I'm sorry you went through that, but I love that you made this video. The more awareness we bring to mental health struggles, the better. I grew up in the 90s when mental health was WAYY more stigmatized than it is now. So many times, if people admitted they struggled with mental health issues, they were made fun of, insulted, and sometimes even ostracized from their communities. For some reason it's as though we as a society have been conditioned to believe we're supposed to be robots without concern or emotion. I'm so glad more and more awareness is coming out about mental health struggles. Because we _are_ human. Mental health struggles _are_ real, and they _are_ valid - and no one is less worthy of acceptance or love because of those struggles. We are human, not robots. And I'm so glad there's been more awareness of that fact.

[@mkissin493]

I am a new subscriber to a 3-month old video. Thank you for your practicality, for being so real and for that charm / energy you bring. I am just on the other side of being a "newbie" but I have had a number of enjoyable adventures with my grown son. We hike, backpack, bike pack together, usually in the two or three night range. My anxiety hits me mostly during planning, when i make my famous spreadsheets. I share these with my son and I can hear his eyes roll from way across the county where he lives. I am a retired IT Project Manager, so my adventures are not an ad-hoc affair. As the years, adventures rolled by, one way I personally came to avoid severe anxiety: simplicity. You are doing great work, helping to keep people like me informed!!!

[@TheMamabee2]

This is my favorite so far. Thank you for keeping things REAL. ((Hugs)) You just shifted me over from casual watcher to committed support.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

I just saw this - thank you so, so much!! 🤗 that means so much to me.

[@msbaseball333]

Miranda- as someone with GAD and at times absolutely debilitating panic attacks, thank you for helping to normalize this and help others struggling

[@JCrozier1]

This is your show gosh darn! You do you! Rainer, is a great friend to you. I'm glad he was able to chill things out the first time, and then be ready to pack up and bounce when the time was right. I'm so glad you didn't randomly cut the video. I have felt this way on my motorcycle trips before, but had to push through due to time restraints, or reservations. Thanks for sharing!

[@ashleyfortner7640]

Miranda!! As a female solo camper, I cannot thank you enough for being honest and not doing the social media whitewashing!! Hell yes!! You are a bad ass!!! Rainer way to model a supportive friend. Getting the shot or the adventure is not worth sacrificing mental health- I have to remind myself of that constantly. Normalize trusting your instincts. Knew I loved this channel for a reason. I’ll follow you guys to the end of the snowy earth ❤

[@thecarbonprop]

I know exactly how you feel. ❤ Anxiety and depression sucks because people cannot see on the outside how devastating it is. Thank you for making me feel seen the way I see you.

[@swysocki3920]

As a person who was diagnosed 20+ years ago, ABSOLUTELY THE CORRECT CALL! Thank you for your honesty and making this real for those who don't experience what we learn to deal with on a daily basis. I'm sure many have offered advice, so please don't take this as such unless you think it might help. Otherwise, please accept virtual hugs from one who lives with the same diagnoses as you. My Chiropractor shared this with me and as we all know, many people have opinions on what to try to help. I thought, "What the heck. I'll give it a try." Take two fingers and press between the eyes and just a teeeeeny bit up (right on the brow ridge). Rub slow, small circles in place as the panic attack comes on. It Worked! I've used this quite a few times now and if I feel it coming on or at the very beginning of the panic attack, I begin doing this and it allows my body enough space to back up and work through it. I now have the space to center my mind and use other tools to help stave off the attack.

[@joelynnrathmann8031]

I have loved every single one of your videos. However, as someone with anxiety and depression- I need you to know … this is the BEST video you have uploaded. Without question. Be so proud of yourself and your channel, because this is the most helpful, the most real, the most effective video you’ve created. Simply beautiful!

[@TheMamabee2]

This. 🎉

[@johannebungum837]

When I saw the title of this video, my first thought was “I’m so glad she made this video”. That’s not because I’m glad you had a panic attack, but because it’s such an important topic. So many people get stuck in the mindset of having to finish a hike no matter what. We need to talk about the other alternatives❤ In Norway we what’s called “fjellvettregler”, which kinda translates to common sense rules of hiking. One of those rules are “there is no shame in turning around” (det er ingen skam å snu). This video is a perfect example of why this is an important rule❤️ I love your videos. Hope the next hike goes better, and if not, you can always try again❤️

[@maubeecat2910]

Hi! Thanks for having the courage to share this. I hope it helped you and I’m sure it helped some viewers. Thanks also to Rainer for being so supportive and understanding. Maybe you told him what you need or maybe he just intuitively knows the best way to help, but it was good to see him helping (not just fixing). All the best to you both!

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

After years of working together and best-friend-ship, he is truly awesome at helping me through moments like this 💚

[@JustinOutdoors]

Been there. There have been times I don't even make it to camp and just turn around and drive home. Always appreciate your realness Miranda and, in this case, helping to make mental health less of a taboo topic of conversation.

[@chrisdever6638]

Dear Miss Amanda, I have been watching your videos for years. I am an avid camper and backpacker and admire your outdoors spirit greatly. You are awesome!! Having said that, I must admit that I do not suffer from anxiety, nor do I completely understand it. After watching your video I can only say that I respect you and Rainer even more!!!! Thank you!! And you guys are simply amazing!!!!!!!!

[@smeenymadewild]

I’m so glad you shared this video! It’s so important to listen to your body and not feel like you have to “fake it” in the name of making content! You are amazing and thank you for keeping it real❤

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

Thank you so much! 💚 After the fact, I was like, "I never fake it for any other videos, why would I start now" but in the moment I definitely thought I could just push through and pretend.

[@shugemery]

It broke my heart a little to see you in that state sitting in your "tarp formerly tent." I get it. But for you to have the strength to film yourself during your episode..wow...that took guts. You are usually always so cheerful but I do know that we put certain faces and attitudes out there as a protection. I know I do. Much respect to you Rainer for his support of you and understanding. And much respect to you. Especially for your follow up. The trail awaits you Miranda.....

[@briandoolittle3422]

I do a little winter backpacking, and Ive always felt myself closer to the edge than any other time of year, regardless of how much warmth/food/fuel I bring. Theres something about the inescapable cold and short days/long nights that gets to me. Over time, Ive gotten better at dealing with the emotional-ness of winter backpacking, but its never totally gone away. I also have GAD and depression.

[@deepsubmergence9357]

The Instagram image of the perfect adventure with no stress, amazing sunsets and boundless joy isn't reality. There are some days that suck. After 40 years of guiding in the mountains, anytime you feel that you need to reduce your risk is almost always the right decision. You made the right call for you. Thanks for being vulnerable and teaching us all an important lesson.

[@lizzietrot2522]

And this is why we love this channel Thank you for posting this very real look at mental health and the outdoors

[@JS-ph9ee]

I, too, wanted to say how much I appreciate the honesty of this video. I’m 62 and have battled (often feel beaten by) depression and anxiety all my life. It can seem bewildering to others, which can leave you feeling misunderstood, judged and alone.

[@Nicole.Kirsten]

From a fellow worry worm -- thank you for sharing this piece of you with the rest of us! It feels validating to know that there are other outdoors-people that struggle with mental health. This video is such a real reminder to listen to and care for your body and mind. 💚

[@crcurran]

"This is my cry, gosh darn" TY for posting this. It's important for people to know that you can change your plans if things aren't right. You weighed it out as not a bucket list activity or some big planned trip then decided to go home to recuperate. That works.

[@jaylamble7035]

I appreciate that this video is more about the mental health issue but as far as winter camping goes: since you are pulling a sled you can use a different kind of "stake." You take a 1' square of 1/2" plywood with a 2" hole in the center. You put the stake with the line attached through the hole then pile snow on the plywood. The weight of the snow on the plywood will hold the stakes in place better than just driving it into the snow.

[@mistygipson274]

You have been my favorite outdoor "personality" since I discovered your REI channel, but this video is probably your absolute best work. Kudos to you for showing us the REAL side of life, and kudos to Rainer for being supportive and encouraging. I love you both, and I only hope that this video reaches everyone who needs to see it. Thank you!

[@mholder1324]

As someone with anxiety and depression, thank you for being honest and sharing the good and the bad in your videos! Sidenote - I burst out laughing when I looked through the Chapter titles and saw "I have anxiety and depression" casually sandwiched in there between searching for a campsite and arriving at camp

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

😆 where better to casually sandwich it than between two seemingly innocuous things?!

[@musingwithreba9667]

That's where depression and anxiety are. Right there amongst all the other normal everyday things.

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

^ THIS.

[@jnh473]

As someone who loves to be outdoors and travel but has severe panic attacks in new situations, it was really lovely to have you share this. It makes me feel less alone in the outdoor community and that despite my anxiety I can still do the things I love.

[@RainerGolden]

❤

[@MirandaGoesOutside]

❤️❤️❤️ you're the best

[@bigf1ip]

@MirandaGoesOutside Great Job identifying your triggers and staying aware of how your emotions are being affected. Even though you didn’t plan it, You showed exactly how you should execute a risk evaluation. Many people forget about the human end of risk analysis and the bottom line is if it doesn’t feel right it isn’t right and getting out of that situation is a good call. Thanks for sharing…I relate with what you went through. I am glad Rainer was there to balance you both. @RainerGolden, great job helping Miranda you are the hero of this story.

[@jenellsaphid]

I wish everyone had a you in their lives, Rainer. You're one in a million.

[@Paigebaby]

It’s amazing how beautifully you handled this. It’s totally okay to have anxiety and depression. It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to leave. I wish more people (my past self included) knew this! I think it’s so rad that you were able to listen to your body and recognize what was happening. Thank you for sharing this and spreading awareness!

[@robinbrooks3378]

Thank you for sharing and not keeping silent!❤ Thank you for taking care of you!

[@DPM-dp9on]

I didn’t think it was possible to find you even more likable and make me want to watch all your videos. Nothing but full respect for you and best wishes in all your endeavors. Oh, Rainer is one stand up guy.

[@Tallulahswonderland]

ive been feeling this very heavy, disorienting and dissociative energy recently. you are not alone in the struggles of depression. thank you for being vulnerable and authentic. i’m sorry that you had to feel this way!

[@windeaglemartin1800]

Very timely share for me. Just bailed out of a 32 mile backpack 5 miles in. I wasn’t as prepared physically as I thought and that affected me mentally as I too suffer from depression and anxiety. I was using the hike as a prep hike for PCT and suddenly felt like a complete failure. At 70 I know my years ahead are numbered so that added pressure. I video my hikes and that adds pressure to complete them. I was at a point where getting out was easier than for the next 28 miles. I might have been able to push through maybe and get myself in more of a difficult situation. I’m an experienced backpacker having completed many long thru hikes. I am still struggling with the feelings of failure. I cried a little watching you go through your hike knowing you felt similar. I’m regrouping and doubling down on my training and PT. Not ready to pull the plug yet on the PCT until I know I have gave it my all. Hugs to you…glad you shared!

[@DeniseMP82]

I am a casual watcher of your channel, but I have mad respect for you for sharing this experience. I remember being in the boundary waters many years ago with a friend and having a panic attack the first night. Your video makes it real, and makes the rest of us feel okay if we don't have a picture-perfect outing every time. Thanks so much for sharing and wishing you the best on your next winter outing!

[@katieh2552]

Miranda, I’ve been watching your videos for a couple years and rarely comment but I wanted to say THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for your openness and honesty and vulnerability with this video. I also struggle with multiple mental health issues including depression and anxiety and this video resonated SO much with me. And it reminds me that I am very much not alone in my experiences. So thank you so much for sharing this with all of us!! ❤

[@GraceSerenityK]

Being honest is always the best idea. Destigmatizing mental illnesses and handicaps is what we need right now! I really appreciate you letting people know they aren't suffering alone, and to not feel ashamed. I sorry your trip had to be cut short, but im glad you didnt try to push through and possibly do something dangerous!

[@simco75248]

I’ve had GAD/PO/MDD since 1995. Not fun but well managed. It’s really hard for others to understand how terrifying it is to have an out of the blue, full blown panic attack, followed by a long period of depression and free floating anxiety. You did the right thing. Take care of yourself and keep soldiering on! See you in the snow next time!

[@paths1111]

Really gutsy of you to share! Thank you for keeping it real, and props to Rainer for being so caring and supportive. Knowing one's limits and when to push and when to call it off is as important as any other skill in backpacking and in life. Wishing you all the best!

[@roroc1311]

I appreciate you opening up & sharing this video. I ended up at a super crowded campground last summer & was so overwhelmed by the amount of people there and the fact that my campsite was surrounded by people. I panicked bc I had drove 2 hrs to camp. Instead of running home, I found the next available campground & ended up loving it. You always have to l listen to your body and gut instincts. This video is a great reminder of that and I really appreciate your vulnerability. Thank You!

[@joshb0508]

I feel seen, thank you! I have been struggling with panic disorder since I was 15. High output activities and being far from "help" are the biggest triggers for my panic attacks. Ironically, my main passion in life is exploring the backcountry. Its a horrible paradox to live with. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I've done a LOT of pushing though over the years. I appreciate seeing someone call it when they think they need to. You've earned a big fan. Cheers!

[@flaskehrlenmeyer4349]

thank you for this. I am a person who has some disabilities and I am also a person who teaches people how to go into the outdoors safely and comfortably. knowing when to pack it in is a LARGE part of being safe and comfortable.

[@huntleycoman7017]

I have 100% backpacked in and then left! I too was like “nope, going home where I’m safe and warm.” I could tell the minute you decided to start packing up you felt better. Just wanted to also say that everyone here loves to see you just hiking too! I love to hear what you have to say ❤ you don’t need to spend the night out there ❄️

[@jamesparsons8693]

Miranda, you are lucky to have such a good friend as Rainer !!! You don' t have to push yourself to make others happy. I have watched your show for many years. Camping should be fun and when issues come up your real fans who love you understand!!! You will get back out there again and we will be watching. With much respect James .

[@KumaTsunami]

I'm glad you got yourself out of a bad situation, and props to Rainer for being accepting that you needed to call it short.

[@Kaichee]

Miranda, Rainer, thanks so much for taking care of yourselves and each other!

[@youngzm]

Very proud of you Miranda. It takes a lot of courage to call a trip, especially when it's for business as much as pleasure, show real challenges, and raw emotions online. Here for you and really happy that Rainer is the good supportive friend he is too.

[@clarawoods5265]

(I never comment on videos) But I am SO proud of you for doing what was best for your mental health. It must have been a really tough choice but you're really inspiring an entire generation of hikers and normalizing feelings that so many of us struggle with alone. Thank you for sharing this experience and your beautiful energy in every video you've made. Lots of love

[@akiwiincanada]

The best hiking buddies are the ones that understand that when someone in the group is having a tough day, that it's 100% OK to head back to town for ice cream. Thank goodness for Rainer. Loved this video for being so real - sometimes it doesn't work out, and that's AOK. Love your channel! Keep up the great work.

[@vc5213]

Thank you so much for sharing this! ❤ I too have anxiety and depression (don't you love the double-whammy?!?) and have had many a panic attack while hiking, camping, and backpacking. I think it's important to remember that while getting outside can help your mental health, you can't escape your mind and no one talks about it. Thank goodness for all the people like Rainer that we have to lean on when we're struggling.

[@jasonfreyer9888]

I am beyond grateful you were bold enough to share this with us. Honesty and shining a light on mental health helps us support each other, and I sure hope you feel the love from the community!

[@pressedandpurposed]

Working in youth mental health, I appreciate that you didn't hide this! I also have dealt with panic attacks and they are intense. Very proud and impressed with how you and Rainer handled it.

[@matissta]

Your honesty and authenticity is beautiful; don't worry about it, girl! We're still here for you.

[@katd1586]

Thank you so much for being so real, raw, and transparent about your mental health. Your willingness to be so open and vulnerable just inspires me!! Thank you Miranda!!

[@phyllisjohnson205]

I have no idea how it feels to be clinically depressed or have anxiety. What I do know is you handled yourself very well and explained your process of pulling through it. Cudos for you! Thank you for showing your serious side. I have always enjoyed your light-hearted videos and admired your abilities. I admire you even more now. 🤗☺️🤗

[@BensonForest]

I'm so glad Tucker knew to come sit by you when you needed him, all the best dogs know. Thanks for sharing such a personal experience. You make the world a better place.

[@melissareilly6235]

Thank you for showing your true authentic self and all that you were dealing with in those moments. I just recently found your channel and have been enjoying your videos. I am not sure that I will ever go backpacking, but watching your videos is making me think that I might one day. I recently was diagnosed with ADHD, which was a discovery on my personal mental health journey dealing with anxiety and depression. I appreciate others out there who are open to showing the struggles that they face and how they can get through it and move on. You are a wonderful amazing person, keep doing what you are doing!

[@rfdinesen4027]

Thank you so much for showing others how common this is and a healthy way of dealing with it too. Please thank your pup for the helpful guidance at the end:)

[@aleahduitsman9090]

Panic attacks are really awful! You are so awesome for showing this side for others who struggle with the same thing! I'm sorry you had to go through that! *HUGS*