Missing tortoise survives 30 years in attic - Peculiar Portions Podcast #58

[@MusingsofaMildManneredMan]

It tickles me how after 15+ years of friendship Simon can still catch Lewis off guard and reduce him to a crying mess. These two give off such BFF goals, we all need a Simon, or Lewis, in our lives...

[@Nanamowa]

They're lovers, not BFF's, silly.

[@superdrummergaming]

I love when Lewis just has breakdowns from laughing.

[@Shikamaru747]

it's very contagious XD

[@spacemaria_]

Lewis' cry laughing breakdown is my favourite recurring character on PP

[@ComXDude]

You know that Lewis is royally tickled when he stops laughing and just starts squeaking.

[@ThatGuy-vr2jv]

Roe... Salmon roe... That's exactly what you guys were describing. Salty, burst and savory.

[@Junoswoof]

The boys are gonna go nuts when they hear about soup dumplings.

[@SirNightmareFuel]

Came here to comment the same! astounded that Lewis didn't think of it, since he's spent all these years in Japan

[@captironsight]

Made a comment before I saw this. This was the perfect solution.

[@JamesLikesIcedCream]

Wb oysters they explode

[@cameron6770]

Meat pies?

[@LordMiante125]

33:41 "They're [mountain lions] probably just like cuddly little fellas...Are they a real threat? I don't hear a LOT of people being killed by 'em." -"Ranger" Lewis Brindley, 2022.

[@MrEvers]

it speaks volumes on their friendship when they can still make eachother laugh so much

[@MrDipz158]

Lewis and his laughing fits are so great. I need a compilation!!

[@Minrtyui]

I'm loving these longer PP's!

[@klaxoncow]

That's what she said.

[@NCkiller4890yo]

Yeah i felt inferior that their pp is that long :(

[@xSuperiorManx]

@@klaxoncow ... as she was leaving me for Jerome. :´-(

[@LyuSapphire]

Honestly, I love watching Peculiar Portions podcast episodes accompanied with a video of silence randomly interrupted with seagulls. When it happens to time right as Lewis says something stupid that leads to an awkward silence, the experience is gold.

[@cboneperlstone9661]

44:23 I like when Lewis reads directions in his Fighting Fantasy “if X, turn to page P, if Y, then turn to page Q” voice

[@phraggers]

I can never see Alan Cumming without standing up with my arms raised in triumph "I AM INVINCIBLE!"

[@klaxoncow]

Congratulations to Simon for getting the "venomous / poisonous" distinction correct. My hero. p.s. And now that I watch further, congratulations to Lewis for knowing that snakes don't need to eat all that much. Although, deduct one point for not knowing why. The reason, of course, is that they're cold-blooded animals. Warm-blooded animals - like humans - need more energy to generate heat. Whereas, cold-blooded animals - lacking this requirement - eat far less than their warm-blooded counterparts. A crocodile, for instance, could happily get by on a chicken a week, I'm sure.

[@mattymerr701]

If I stay in the sun can I also not eat much?

[@lini0024]

@@mattymerr701 I wouldn’t try it but there are people who claim they live off of sun or whatever and aren’t dead yet

[@judechauhan6715]

I love the Camera work on these.

[@SoLaR27]

The tortoise gender changing is likely because it's hard to tell the gender of a tortoise that's under 4 years old. They probably discovered that it was male after finding it. They also talked about this on Triforce when Sips got Terry.

[@al145]

The hippo part, Simon is thinking of "soup dumplings" which do exist, I think they're generally at like Chinese restaurants or something

[@codebracker]

Or caviar

[@jaymerkin]

@@codebracker or soft boiled eggs.

[@JokeCubed]

Dr Simon Clark should write another book called "The Fur-mament" about Mountain Lions.

[@jeffkent6886]

"It's Bananas" Had me in hysterics :-D

[@graceroth3045]

Hippos are herbivores but they’re extremely protective of their young and territorial so if you’re anywhere near a wild one you are at risk. Their bite force is crazy but the main way they’d get you is by knocking you over and trampling you. They’re amazing swimmers and they weigh a lot so although it might take them longer to speed up, once they hit terminal velocity they’ll hit you like a freight train, literally. I think the only way your guaranteed to survive an attack would be to get behind/into something heavy that they couldn’t smash through or run fast enough and far enough that you get away or until they lose interest because your not near their home anymore

[@Shikamaru747]

39:07 - ooh that is a spicy joke there Lewis, very nice

[@livid_spider]

Im calling bs on the tortise story, there's no way that tortise could survive in an attic for 30 years and even if it could itd be deformed from the lack of UV light and calcium

[@spelcheak]

attic window?

[@livid_spider]

@@spelcheak that still wouldn’t be enough for a red foot tortoise, they usually need 12 hours of uv consistently and I’d bet the attic window gets like an hour or two of direct sunlight through it at most

[@Nanamowa]

@@livid_spider How long can they hibernate when their metabolism slows? You're saying they need 12 hours of UV, but that's assuming the tortoise is active and their metabolism is normal.

[@livid_spider]

@@Nanamowa half a year at most

[@LordClunk]

I think Simon is the only one of the original yogscast that didn't have a mid life crisis and change his appearance.

[@kommodore6691]

Lewis is still a small Lebanese boy, he just changed his haircut a few times which isn't that strange.

[@RTheren]

@@kommodore6691 Incorrect. Lewis is still in Japan. This must be his doppelganger.

[@redwiltshire1816]

Not by choice anyway lol

[@raafmaat]

simon had the biggest midlife crisis of them all! he was gone a full year in 2015! and ever since he came back he only sporadically joins main channel series! I miss pre-2015 simon :(

[@Conlexio]

have you seen the clown

[@epiclexi1234]

never once has it been recommended to "pack your tortoise away for months" 😭😂😭

[@cameronwilsey9334]

Brumnation is a thing, but I don't think it's something you should try to induce. That said, I know a bit about lizards and little specifically about turtles

[@epiclexi1234]

@@cameronwilsey9334 I know a lot about reptiles / animals in general because it's my passion and I've been involved with them my whole life lol and brumation is a thing but is based on environment and needs and many tortoise species do not brumate! only some tortoises brumate and when kept indoors like most peoples small pet tortoises are, they do not typically require extreme brumation. usually in captive tortoises they just tend to eat less and move less! brumation can actually be dangerous in some instances such as if the tortoise gets too cold or loses too much weight (or if it is a species that wouldn't brumate in the wild such as the ones from warm climates, which is a lot of tortoises lol)! during brumation you must make sure your tortoise doesn't get dehydrated which would definently happen if you "pack your tortoise away for months" lol

[@epiclexi1234]

although, there are a lot of turtles and tortoises do require brumation during colder times to ensure proper metabolism and hormones!

[@epiclexi1234]

but that never requires putting them in an attic box and ignoring their existence for months/years!😂

[@capulcinka]

so Simon, reading through the comments you now know about soup dumplings, but if you are still wondering how those are made - the stock is very strong and gets chilled overnight so it becomes gelatinous, they just scoop a spoon of the soup jelly into each dumpling and as it steams it liquifies again :)

[@XxHizzyxX]

37:50 ...they're describing Chinese soup dumplings.

[@SupahLinkio]

Simon needs to try Xiaolongbao, they're basically a steamed soup dumpling.

[@mattymerr701]

Man soup dumplings are so good Best type of dumpling

[@sheppieboi]

The commandments of tonka? You mean... the Tonkommandments?

[@Meximagician]

1:17 Simon: "How did he get in there?" A giraffe in The Royal Albert Hall? Well that's easy... he ducked.

[@anononomous]

Don't put your Tortoise in the fridge people. Cool, dry, but *NO AIR* .

[@isaaccboyd8887]

New simons pp! My favorite thing about today

[@SGz_Eliminated]

When they were talking about the savoury food thing I just kept thinking about an egg. Specifically a bacon and egg roll

[@KuueenKumi]

ah man, what a good day for Simon content

[@SoulReaverVidView]

Thanks for the video! I was hoping you would stubble upon the fact that hippos have poop cannons, and weaponize their shits. Pretty funny fact. =D

[@glisa3801]

Tortoise owner here! You can choose to hibernate your tortoise or just let them stay awake year round with heat lamps. When torts hibernate they are either left in a burrow outside during the cold or smaller torts can be kept in a refrigerated area inside. One wouldn’t just put them in the attic if they knew proper tortoise care. All tortoise are turtles also so you can be correct either way! His coloring is also completely normal for his species he’s a red foot (possibly a cherry head)

[@BenPyman]

Haven't either of you visited Zylus in the Netherlands and had Bitterballen? A thick meat stew is thickened and then rolled into balls, which are breaded and fried.

[@shadowLurker4v]

The era of Chimpfluencers is coming

[@NeuroticNicky87]

Hippos 500 per year - Mountain Lions less than 24 in the last 100 years. For those who are interested.

[@adodge2]

Simon is an absolute class act.

[@InsaneChef]

I like to think that everything Simon does now is born out of the important videos playlist he watched

[@macclownn]

savory food that bursts, mini kievs!!!!

[@electronic_bunny]

Simon really needs to be introduced to dumplings.

[@bushybeardedbear]

Honestly, if _PETA_ are ever accusing an animal's guardian of neglect, just assume the animal is fine and dandy. Send a real animal charity to investigate. _Peta_ are messed up on several levels.

[@KuueenKumi]

WWF or ASPCA

[@luciajonas7483]

So doughballs filled with various sauces that you stick in the oven and then you can eat them like savoury revels/mystery doughnuts

[@donm6578]

15:30 wow Simon shouted that exactly the same both times. Must be all the vocal training for yogs songs

[@mattymerr701]

Those sonic employees must be absolutely stupid. "I can't hear a rattle and the snake doesn't have a rattle.... must be a rattlesnake" Also, why would you call the cops for that?? You'd call a snake catcher or someone who can actually deal with it. They got lucky they got a knowledgeable cop

[@TF2CrunchyFrog]

The food that burst in your mouth to reveal the filling would need a sort of harder outer shell that then dissolves in your mouth, probably gelatine. If might only work when kept cooled, for the consistency.

[@Jokie155]

Effing hell, I'll be glad when PETA just completely dissolves, the sheer amount of shittiness coming from them in every age.

[@Ihileath]

Suing someone for owning a monkey is actually a good thing in fairness, they absolutely shouldn’t be in human homes, though peta is fucking awful generally.

[@Cyrathil]

@@Ihileath Yeah, if they just stuck to things like that, it'd be fine. It's when they start claiming that pet ownership is equal to human slavery that I start losing them. It hides the actual good they do. They become reactionaries that are easy to dismiss.

[@joshuawood9224]

Oh no, I'm stuck! help me step-Hippo!

[@RubelliteFae]

Asian cuisine is rife with savory, bite-sized food pockets: takoyaki, gyoza, shumai...

[@VeggeMight]

really got old school yogpod at the end :D

[@StefanEdek]

Great Britain is an island, so there is always water between them and hippos.

[@aylawright4426]

37:20 seems like they're explaining 'boba' to me

[@FriendlyKat]

38:00 Cum. (We we’re all thinking it. I just typed what we were all thinking) 43:10 That cheeky glance to the camera by Lewis made me laugh. I caught the joke, sir. It was not missed. Haha! Loving the camera work, jokes, and chemistry between these two. So many great jokes and craziness! LOL

[@scorake14]

Chicken Kiev's are the only savioury thing i can think of that has a liquidy sauce within meat

[@thecoldwarcowboy]

The food you’re looking for is a soup dumpling-> xiaolongbao

[@Jon-T]

When is piss news coming back Simon?!?! I need some of that sweet sweet piss... news. Piss news

[@Dafoodmaster]

Soup Dumplings and Poached/Soft boiled/sunny side up are savoury explody treats if you put some effort into how you eat them.

[@andrewrobinson4019]

12:51 witnesses two men have a stroke at the same time.

[@kieren4475]

Oh you silly gibbons! You put the video description as the same PP from last week! tut tut

[@zdavisgenki243]

Love it, guys!

[@rokongreenday]

The answer you were looking for was a nice Chicken Kiev lads

[@tomotion]

Caviar ~38:00

[@maudrid]

Jalapeño poppers

[@ShadowGirl-]

at 36minutes, they are basically describing hot-pockets

[@captironsight]

36:00 Chinese Soup Bao. Savory dish that bursts in your mouth.

[@onironius8008]

Bursting savory foods: particularly juicy sausages, soup dumplings, animal eyeballs, insects/grubs.

[@stinkyferret1282]

i was kinda hoping they would talk about the dog that got into the gorilla exhibit at the san diego zoo. the stories they did talk about were great though

[@pokerfandk]

"Scooped it with his bare hands" and no mention of "Scoop it up with your fuck hands! And bring back handfuls of oil"

[@Kelnef]

Simon is literally describing a pie with that liquid filled savoury item lmao

[@nova9731]

whoa its been a WHILE since ive seen a yog vid in my feed...

[@joehoul]

I think my head in a hippos mouth would be like an overbaked calzone, crunchy, meaty, creamy.

[@TF2CrunchyFrog]

As a biologist, the idea that people can't tell a python apart from a rattlesnake makes me facepalm.

[@Orillion123456]

Wait a moment, that article is from The Dodo? Isn't that a joke website like hard drive or the onion?

[@joshtommins7556]

I think Simon was thinking of a rag pudding

[@KadKomrkz]

New Planet of the Apes movie in which apes have become influencers.

[@peterserafin9957]

Pastry shell with savory insides - boys you are talking about pies and pasties. Gregg's lawyers are gonna be in touch.

[@SirNightmareFuel]

Now that you mention it, an egg and bacon pie fits the bill

[@Thetruepianoman]

Now thats two functioning human beings

[@Asphyr]

Cheese filled sausages, though they dod the pop in the grill.

[@Dimo-lt4tw]

Not enough Mr. Popcorn

[@schrodingersspoon1705]

Takoyaki depending on where you get it is a savory popper? At least the ones I had

[@scatterbrainjane6928]

That’s a cherry head red footed tortoise ❤️

[@Nillerus]

ooh, brilliant!

[@lexavalentine3059]

Name the hippo video "Shadow of Israphel 43"

[@FeDeRaTTay]

"Manuelita vivia en peguajoo pero un dia se marcho.."

[@MajinKenpachi]

Swanson's Meat Pies Turkey, chicken, beef. gravey filled

[@beebo236]

So it's the Tonka Mandments?

[@dethmin173]

I wonder how often Lewis references his veganism on average per episode.

[@SirNightmareFuel]

We need more spreadsheets, dag nabbit.

[@ohhmanitscam]

Probably not enough tbh, cancer and heart disease aren't stopping themselves so we gotta stop eating the nasty carcinogens in cooked meats 🤓 or we could just keep going to cancer research UK fundraisers where everyone is served bacon 😂 may as well rename to cancer development UK with that sort of idiocy Movember gets me the worst, let's fight testicular/prostate/cock cancer by *checks notes* eating mammalian estrogen via meat (source my uni flatmate decided to eat 2 packs of bacon in one day to "fight cancer" for movember. He denied the science... While studying at a university 🙄 N o I c e Please call me preachy I can't wait 🙏

[@TheMonkeyFlu]

almond croissant filled with marmalade?

[@infernalrose325]

Soup dumplings. You’re not supposed to eat them so they burst in your mouth, but they fit the criteria I think?

[@terrydexter9867]

When are we getting a Diggy Diggy Hole remaster

[@bushybeardedbear]

So... Mountain Flyons...?

[@Tango2007Lacutus]

what happened to frostmorn? its missing half of its guard

[@g3ngar04]

PP Gang!

[@niatscreations4913]

Bitterballen is what they are looking for

[@8bittrix]

we need to set lewis loose with some improv

[@NeinDao]

foie gras dim sum i have eaten where partially filled with a buljong. they burst in my mouth when i ate them and they are savoury

[@DeepTalksPodcast777]

Dude casually talking about eating goose liver and gelatin, of course that'd be savory, but it's more of a charcuterie type of flavor even if heated up. Imo

[@NeinDao]

@@DeepTalksPodcast777 it was in context of there hippo popping human heads like melons conversation where they tried and could not remember a saviory ”wet” food that ”pops” in your mouth

[@JamieAubrey]

37:00 So a jam donuts essentially ?

[@Meximagician]

44:37 I could see Pablo Escobar's hippos in South America having guns.

[@MrZangetsu1997]

It's possible that the reason why the tortoise has red markings is because it could be a Red-Footed Tortoise At my University, there used to be a Dumpling shop on campus, they sold the most delicious Steamed Dumplings, which they used to actually seal some of the Stock inside, which not only kept the Dumpings hot for longer, but also prevented them from drying out

[@live_jive]

There are times where I am watching the Yogs talk about like cat assholes and stuff and I scroll down to see the comments and go past the business enquiries and I am just imagining some CEO being like "cat's assholes!? this is my demographic!"