How To Identify Your Internal Fears - Corey Wilks

[@ChrisWillx]

Hello beautiful people. Here's the timestamps: 00:00 Intro 01:19 From Therapist to Coach 10:08 Are Successful People Fearless? 20:15 Spotting Self-Sabotaging Behaviour 30:36 Problems of Independent Workers 35:07 Dealing with Complacency 44:19 Being Raised in a Low-Income Home 50:07 Strategies to Mitigate Internal Fears 55:04 Importance of a Support Group 1:06:12 Where to Find Corey

[@Beederda]

Just want to say i 35 years old jobs last about a year at a time and are never 9-5 more like work 2pm-10 than open 5am-2 the next day and than a 10-7 the next day it’s literally a grind to the entire soul and its like this in Canada for me and alot more

[@davidfarrall]

Corey is right about attribution of victimhood and cementing it in. We can be our own severest critics and worst enemies. What resists internally, persists.

[@rdub4nd]

I tell my daughter that I've learned just as much from watching people do things that I don't want to emulate as from seeing people do things that I do.

[@davidfarrall]

A useful podcast for modern times. Corey is an excellent coach and therapist and Chris is always spot on as host.

[@xyresic99]

I appreciate the unsparing reality of Mr. Wilks words and observations immensely.

[@wifeandmomma7452]

The self-sabotaging description is ME. I will definitely be following Mr. Wilks for more knowledgeon how to curb it. 🙌🏾

[@yohaizilber]

The hard choices -- what we most fear doing, asking, saying -- are very often exactly what we need to do.

[@brushstroke3733]

"The cave we fear to enter is the cave that holds our treasure." Carl Jung or Joseph Campbell I think.

[@peopleideas4436]

Every word holds value in this conversation. You're an valuable person in my way towards all my effort towards an upward trajectory in my life.

[@captainbeastazoid7084]

Great guest. I didn't mind the grunt language. It's how me and my buddies talk, honestly. And some of the stuff he was saying about self-sabotaging behaviors really hit home. I've been holding myself back for years with the perfectionist thing. There's a few major projects I need to finish up

[@toughlovestutter]

This is life changing

[@AaronMatthew]

man, that's me ... on both sides of the convo ...... middle Georgia rural nothingness, breaking out of the deep south, toxic family, no role models .... bro ..... this podcast is such a resource. Thanks, Chris!

[@makhijacpallc7571]

This is a great podcast. Sometimes we put ourselves down.

[@alex.jay.davidson]

Hey Chris, I really love the fact that you don't edit your podcasts very much. I'm also 34. I think men are also feeling the stress of aging, and youth being an ideal more than in the past. I see when you smile you have lines in your face etc. Maybe some grays in your beard (like me)? You're an incredible specimen, but It's nice to see that I can see age happens to even the best. Don't change. Keep your show going!

[@padproperties-cy2kq]

Are successful ppl fearless? You guys are right. If your 10 steps ahead of someone. You can’t tell someone at step two what to do. You just don’t remember. That’s why I respect @davidgoggins. Even though he’s made it. He still straps up everyday and suffers. That’s what makes him qualified to teach those who are 10 steps behind. Chris love your content brother. Pure inspiration keep it going! 💪🏾💯

[@davidfarrall]

Chris has made his own luck by putting the effort in to remove the FUD, Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt.

[@renjithomas8088]

Fantastic topic! Especially at 39 minutes into the cast

[@thelaw557]

Self belief was something that was already integrated into their lives probably as secure attachment style developed since their childhood.

[@davidfarrall]

Failure and success are like the peaks and troughs of Life - they are cousins that need each other. The great Alan Watts teachings relied on this principle.

[@BraedenTheG]

“He who conquers himself is the mightiest warrior.” - Confucius

[@AmeliaBodilia]

“The second mouse gets the cheese.” - Unknown

[@danfontaine8179]

“The Indian who drank two pots of coffee drown in his own tea pee”

[@unknownpara7]

This was Really Good One Chris. KEEP IT UP!

[@brushstroke3733]

Great interview, lots of wisdom and motivating ideas. Thanks for the push!

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Glad it helped!

[@brushstroke3733]

@@coreywilkspsyd Fear is so silly, yet so debilitating (seemingly.) The fear of rejection is lodged so deep, but seems so absurd from my superficial, conscious mind perspective. I realize I am the only one who could internally accept or reject other peoples' approval or rejection of me, yet I still behave as if other people really have the power to reject me. Anyway, thanks again for the thoughtful discussion and reminder that fear is the only thing stopping me from enjoying some level of success.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

@@brushstroke3733 No problem 🤘

[@arthurjwan176]

This is such a good episode! Great work guys.

[@fidellityfury2252]

Thank you! i try not to live in fear!

[@KylecoreGuitar]

I didn't know Karl Urban knew so much about psychology

[@coreywilkspsyd]

This comment wins 😂

[@academicenglishskillsuk]

Yeah this is quite interesting but it's not saying anything we haven't heard a thousand times before i.e. procrastination, fears, self-sabotage, death bed, pushing past our restrictions yadda yadda.

[@randomnameindeed]

Exactly. Many people already know this, however, actually putting it into practice is the hard part.

[@droborja]

@@randomnameindeed this.

[@2410manchester]

You absolutely nailed the spending hesitancy for me. I grew up lower working class and have significant income now. I find myself so many times being aggravated about the price of certain grocery items, but not blinking on really large purchases. It’s a fear of climbing up to a more luxurious level then falling.

[@brushstroke3733]

I've seen very wealthy people bicker over a few dollars or cents here and there. I think it's a universal, ubiquitous human trait. My dad used to call it "penny wise and pound foolish" ("pound" being the British unit of currency, the British Pound, something like an American Dollar.) It's when we worry about small change but spend big money loosely. I think it's fascinating to see in myself and others. It's a kind of hypocrisy or inconsistency at least. Like when people buy a new car, they are often likely to agree to a bunch of way overpriced dealer upgrades that they don't really want or need, but when they go to the grocery store, they won't let themselves buy whatever they want, despite the former costing them thousands of dollars and the latter costing them only a few dollars a bag.

[@MaFe1992]

My Dream is a University Career in my Field, but so many People tell me, that its to risky and the Competition is hard and that the employment contracts are often times temporary = unsecure, but I just can not let it go and at least want to try, instead of giving in to this fear and doing something "safe", but which I do not want. Thank you!

[@coreywilkspsyd]

There are also other ways to educate people if the university route doesn't pan out!

[@brushstroke3733]

No job is secure. Do whatever you enjoy, or you won't really do it well no matter how much you mean to do it well. It might suck following your own path, but at least you'll feel like you did it your way. If you do what others say and it doesn't work out well, that's when you really regret what you did.

[@vintoncerf7562]

There is no secure job in the world, so no need to worry about that

[@AberrantArt]

Imposter syndrome is my biggest hurdle. Can't get over it

[@Randomcharacters285]

dude one trick is to look at others and see them as imposters, you forgot about yourself in the process, works ever time haha

[@AberrantArt]

@@Randomcharacters285 haha I always think "that's what I look like to everyone"🤮

[@oakson3045]

@@AberrantArt i struggle with that too, we got this.

[@jennifersignsoflife1375]

I get some of the advice; however, part of the definitions seem a bit off. "Low income" & "poverty" are two vastly different things here in the states, Idk about there in the UK. It can also depend on where on where you live here. I was born, raised, & still live in coastal SoCal, so low income here is very different than in other places in country. My family was low-middle class while I was growing up, and so were my own four kids, until their dad left us, then we were low income, but were technically "poverty" level by Calif standards, yet I didn't accept any welfare handouts. It was just something I was raised with. You didn't take handouts unless you were actually starving to death. We ate a lot of beans & rice meals, and a lot of dented cans, but we made due & my kids are fantastic and doing really well! I believe that relying upon the gov't creates a cycle of dependency that, once set up, is RARELY broken. *LBJ **_said that_** & has proven that quite definitively!* Yes, wasting time to find pasta sauce that's $.25 cheaper, especially if you have to buy SIX JARS, when you know your pantry only has space for ONE, isn't just a waste of time & energy, but also you'll end up giving away those five extra jars. BTW, the reason I'm typing this LONG comment is bc I muted this video & I'm enjoying some beautiful music. I REFUSE to waste MY precious time on anyone who pollutes my ears with foul language. I find it raises my blood pressure & makes me angry for HOURS afterward. So, that's your choice for whomever you pick to guest on your show & it's my choice to listen to whatever videos I prefer. Usually, I love your guests. Oh well. We all have bad habits. Perhaps your guest isn't bothered by his horrible mouth. Maybe no one has ever complained to him before, or he rebukes them if/when they do. As an LCP, it's surprising that he's not more sensitive to those around him, but whatever. Fewer & fewer ppl nowadays are accepting that they might be responsible for their own behavior (except if offend others for using the wrong pronouns or not allowing them to ride their horses at their ranches bc they're too heavy & may harm the animals [a recent TikTok post by some "influencer"]). Many Blessings to You ALL.

[@Beederda]

Fear of reprisal is something I stumbled upon in myself i had no idea was actually controlling a big part of my life. Digging up our sub conscious fears is in my understanding that im actually attempting to heal but like jung states to the superficial observation it seems like a decent into madness and i say that it certainly feels that way.

[@boldandthebeautifulgimbal2881]

1:19 You watched MacGyver too growing up!

[@mgbm8335]

Yeahhh I'm trying to get a Passport and State ID since I'm trying to get employed and start making money (there are money problems over here). I turn 20 soon too, oh boy. At least I'm taking my baby steps.

[@Alisdair_UK]

Listening, I thought, I can't do because I can't trust myself... and I can't trust myself because I can't do. I worked at St. Nicks for years. Lots of time watching and thinking.

[@Rogerkonijntje]

sargon of akkhad's cousin is great

[@AnEuKen]

23:15 I'mma timestamp this point because I had an immediate impulse when Corey said this. And so I need to hear this again and again until I internalize this. Amazing content as always Chris. Thank you.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Glad it resonated! And yeah, none of us knows wtf we're doing 😂

[@AnEuKen]

@@coreywilkspsyd Thanks for the affirmation! I've revisited this moment a few times these few days and I'm wondering how I can hold this thought with moments which I feel 'I know what I'm doing' as well?

[@coreywilkspsyd]

@@AnEuKen They're not mutually exclusive. We can feel prepared and unprepared at the same time. Probably means you're hitting a good balance between comfort and growth.

[@AnEuKen]

@@coreywilkspsyd thank you. I appreciate the time and wisdom you have provided in answering my question. :)

[@lumenia5296]

please PLEASE make an interview with Dr. K from HealthyGamer

[@akirahoo7519]

Thanks!

[@davidfarrall]

You must conquer your fears really. With segregation and difference comes fear of failure or success and most all, loneliness. But, “Vive la difference”, or we’d all be clones with no new ideas or productions. And always be a failed perfectionist, be ridiculed if necessary.

[@droborja]

34:16 This is my job. I analyze full podcasts and remove these. It sucks lmao.

[@lloovvaallee]

Negative role models; Warrent Buffet once said the secret of success was "don't make mistakes". At first it sounds like simple minded advice but it's actually more profound than you realize. It's also advice that's harder to follow than you might think

[@matthewphilpott1702]

Following your court instincts sounds fun however my core instincts lead to extreme danger

[@ewanderer7233]

Notes for myself 👇

[@ewanderer7233]

Notes for self 18:46-20:13 (actually put advice to use) 23:30-29:25 (self sabotaging) 35:16-47:19 (memento mori) 50:07- (On uncertainty)

[@academicenglishskillsuk]

Don't really agree with the working class thing about not spending money - you can find loads of working class people who come into cash and blow it without guilt. In fact, if you look at loads of lottery winners from wc backgrounds, they went out and blew it! Even going back to the days of betting on the football pools - there is a famous story about Viv Nicolson (I think) called Spend Spend Spend. There's nothing wrong with being cautious with money but I don't see that as some artificial "working class guilt".

[@vintoncerf7562]

they did not generalize it at all, they just said they have it

[@boldandthebeautifulgimbal2881]

Wait, all your regular kit is M.I.A and your lighting is still this good? Fuck, that’s it, I give.

[@knowitall4734]

What did the say was one of his favourite books? (18:18)

[@ethanoptimized]

I needed this one Chris, was very cocky and "I'm not afraid of anything" until recent introspection. Definitely have some fears that are holding me back to address. Have you found that becoming a public figure helped you address those? I'm wondering if publishing your self improvement online is one of the best ways to be accountable for ruthless online commentators! [editing my comment as I watch]-- MAN the point about perfectionism being an excuse around the 21 minute mark hits too close to home right now.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Glad it resonated, man! Perfectionism is a major obstacle for people.

[@alex.jay.davidson]

I like that he said "tits up" as a descriptor.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

😂

[@geetadubey1762]

hi nice video

[@fomofitness]

If you listen carefully you can find a few instances where he forgot to say “fuck” before he finished the sentence

[@boldandthebeautifulgimbal2881]

4:03 If anyone wanted to lose weight, eat just meat. Make it your new “normal” and you’ll succeed. *Note: get regular checkups by your Doctor and take vitamin and mineral supplements, do your research*

[@brushstroke3733]

Is there anything you need to do to protect your kidneys from long term wear and tear from breaking down so many amino acids?

[@davethepieman12]

@23:44

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Thanks for having me on, man. This was a fucking blast 🤘

[@markbardner8214]

Men's groups exist in uk

[@szym1]

Too much swearing.

[@nayrtnartsipacify]

the fuck you mean?

[@davidfarrall]

Today, spend most of your time short circuiting all the optionality around you. Otherwise analysis paralysis will destroy you.

[@rdub4nd]

God how fucked is it that as soon as you said Corey is someone who's transitioned I thought of gender??

[@sononi4798]

I felt like I was personally being called out this whole podcast. 😬 Finding positive people is my biggest challenge. I spend too much time alone and then I start feeling like a weirdo and everyone thinks I'm a weirdo. When I do have social interactions, I realize that I can be very charismatic but then I feel that imposter syndrome. I'm trying to just be honest with people so I'm not creating a false illusion about myself but then there's a slippery slope into weirdo territory. Why is it so hard?

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Twitter's been a great place for me to meet like-minded, supportive people. As long as you're intentional with who you follow and interact with, it's great.

[@paulakass1269]

Jesus guys, laying down the heavy guns ...

[@felipecervantes7881]

I have no friends.

[@Randomcharacters285]

It's cool bro

[@mygirl737g2]

great episode, i have been thinking about my fear lately and how it has created a lil stagnation in my life.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

The fear inoculation exercise is super helpful for breaking through stagnation.

[@kidhardt]

If you get a PhD you should have the pragmalinguistic wherewithal to communicate with bros without resorting to strings of f-bombs.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

I got a Psy.D., so maybe that's why.

[@notraxxful]

I agree with this comment. I was psyched to listen to the podcast, but the guest's cussing really was a turnoff and was especially jarring up against Chris's speech.

[@stopper90004]

Linguistic norms have changed dramatically in the last 20 years. Swearing is no longer remotely relevant as a measure of one's educational level or social standing. Get over it

[@kidhardt]

@@stopper90004 Can't be a comment by somebody who spends time with PhDs.

[@mattnewfoxred]

Great to read you've made a home from that box of yours.

[@PaulRobinson1878]

Meh. Not the usual calibre of guest. A wannabee Tony Robbins trying to repackage 40 year old material

[@pary710]

16:47

[@NoFaithNoPain]

Not the best podcast.. "people are scared of things going wrong".. kind of obvious really, with lots of attached waffle.. please consider thus feedback rather than criticism

[@pricklycatsss]

Not the best feedback… pretty worthless actually 😊

[@aretvar1937]

Intelligent people from working class background are allways the most interesting to listening to. Moreover, a great episod

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Thanks!

[@KRodBabay]

Not a lot of what Corey has said, is different to what I've heard before. But it's his delivery, you can really feel him talk to you in a one to one manner, and that not many can do. Brilliant man!!

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Thanks! Agreed, there's "nothing new under the sun." But I try to put my own spin on stuff and deliver it (hopefully) in a new way to new people.

[@Fillup82]

Mediocrity is a sin.

[@DavidMatias79]

man, I really wish these guys didn't curse so much

[@mkoop]

I needed to hear this. Thank you Chris

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Glad you enjoyed, man!

[@Nik123ify]

great discussion!

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Thanks!

[@mcfaddle1]

I like Chris WIliamson but my goodness what is with all the F bombs? I cringe every time I hear it. Is this a generational thing because I can tell you people my age do not like it. It's not professional!

[@AmyParsons92]

Great episode! Wish I had a role model like this. This is in my Top 10 MW eps! Cheers Chris

[@coreywilkspsyd]

I'm grateful it resonated with you!

[@johnwalton1046]

What a great, salient conversation. Looking forward to the day I'm on your show. Anyone else notice the southern drawl sneak out when he was talking about saving money?

[@coreywilkspsyd]

Haha, I'm from West Virginia. I can't help but have a drawl 😆

[@johnwalton1046]

@@coreywilkspsyd wow, thanks for the reply!! I'm a Texan myself, so I have a bit of an ear for it haha. I enjoy how down to earth your delivery is, it makes your advice and insight a lot more relatable and digestible. Keep up the great work, brother.

[@coreywilkspsyd]

@@johnwalton1046 Thanks so much, man! Will do.

[@teteak0]

Your guest's foul language detracts from his message

[@AberrantArt]

Only for you. I didn't even notice it.

[@christiancardenas6811]

Your opinion will be ignored by Chris and his guest. Congrats 👍

[@dontrushtohate]

Corey has reduced his credibility with every F word he used.

[@DirtyMike124x]

Enough with the fucking blue and orange!!!!!!!!!! It's really not that bad. I'm just being a C. Apart of me is disappointed seeing the color scheme being used damn near everywhere. There is no hiding it amongst the sea of thumbnails we sail through on the internet... Suppose I oughta get used to it. I got another 50 years left on this rock if things go alright.,