Modesty (animated short film)

[@noradora5713]

This is the most attention I’ve ever gotten on something I’ve made and the influx of views and comments was so new and intimidating that I accidentally brought a several-day stomach episode upon myself - if I haven’t hearted your comment it’s because I turned off notifications while I wasn’t feeling good, but I promise I will try to read every single one, I’m so, so glad I was able to achieve what I wanted to with this and help someone somewhere in any way, thank you so much for watching and listening and thinking and commenting

[@watermylove4530]

@@noradora5713 🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂 It's okay! Really sorry for your affliction Hope ur doing better now

[@Blio_]

@@noradora5713 hope you’re feeling better/will soon!

[@craftysteve176]

Can anyone tell me what this video means or the point sorry im stupid

[@ncnyy]

@@craftysteve176it's a story about the sexualisation of the female body, and how to be born as a woman is to be subjected to a lifetime of sexualisation

[@pikachick222]

The minute girls especially special needs girls start puberty they become a mirror for the adults in their lives.

[@blackpigeon3639]

"Menstruation is the only blood that is not born from violence, yet it’s the one that disgusts you the most," Maia Schwartz

[@alis_the_kiwi]

Isn't it weird how the sight of a human body is considered "obscene," while extreme violence and murder is incredibly common and normalized in media?

[@Pneumonoultramicroscopicsillys]

It's so weird to me how you can show someone being ripped apart and their organs laid out on the floor but as soon as a woman's nipple is shown its suddenly not appropriate anymore

[@King_gurgler]

@@Pneumonoultramicroscopicsillys nope breastfeeding scenes are in literal 7+ movies but if it is portrayed in a s**al way of course its seeb as adult

[@King_gurgler]

i hate both

[@melthefallen4558]

Bring back the 70s when naked women was normal on TV (I think? Could be interpreting wrong)

[@bealis7]

This is so true I wish I can just stop people from committing acts of murder it's disgusting and inhumane :(

[@ri13ykw]

the fact that you drew private areas of the body and talk openly about culturally sensitized topics like sexual pleasure and assault really was such an eye opener, thank you. The more you hide a woman and her own the body, the more she becomes.

[@mey_8458]

I'm a virgin but I discovered how to simulate sex and I think i might be addicted because I do it everyday This is probably really weird but it does feel oddly good doing it and im not sure how people would think about this in any other setting idk I really hope i didn't make anyone super uncomfortable because literally no one talks about this if you're worried about me, I'm fine but I just want to talk about this because it's a weird thing I can't shake off sometimes

[@tiredtownstars]

I was doing it every day but I had pain so I only do it when I really want to ( in a private place) but ya I agree with you ,

[@SamD.GOAT0326]

I think thats what people call masturbation ​@@mey_8458

[@blackmule]

​@@mey_8458there's nothing wrong about it It's not shameful, it's a natural bodily function that is normal and healthy for all mammals, and a way to learn more about how your anatomy works I don't know how old you are, but I assume you must be young, sorry if I'm wrong, or at an age where hormones start fluctuating a lot and a lot of new things might seem confusing As long as you are doing it safely (not putting yourself in dangerous situations or causing pain) in private and at appropriate times/places (like in your safe space where no one else is around) you are not doing anything wrong

[@Starfirescav3]

Becoming addicted can seriously ruin your life i suggest you do stuff to try and control and stop it​@@mey_8458

[@autisticatianaralph6751]

the hiking scene hurt the most for me. even when youre alone, or with trusted family, there is still this invisible omnipresent voyeur constantly watching, sexualizing, and preying on your naked body that only your mother seems to be able to point out. it creates this anxiety that no matter where you go or who youre the body you have to carry is always going to be perceived in a predatory manner.

[@Motuochez]

Thisssss. I remember how it felt weird to be shirtless even by myself, alone, because of this.

[@zacharynguyen7286]

Hope everyone doing good and staying safe. If you need to talk to someone or need help, there are people who care. Sending support and hearts. ❤️❤️❤️

[@cupcaketv5673]

​@@Motuochez Your comment reminded me that I feel this way 😅 anytime I'm by myself, shirtless, I always still "cover up" or at least feel exposed.

[@thatveganstudent7714]

Yeah, this whole thing that men can go shirtless and women can’t, it’s often even a CRIME for us is just sick. Until that is changed, men and women cannot be seen as equal infront of the law.

[@BlackbeltHitoshi]

"you have to be modest" sounds like a meme.

[@BobaTeaandWobblyKnees]

...Not being a survivor does not lessen the impact of your words. I am a survivor, and cried my eyes out. Thank you for making this.

[@NoSpectate]

This is completely unrelated but do you think a man should have a say in abortion laws.

[@asillygoofygoober]

​@@NoSpectate I know I wasn't asked but Imo no vagina no opinion

[@BobaTeaandWobblyKnees]

@@NoSpectate ...Yes, however everyone with a uterus should also have a say in abortion laws. And abortion should not be made illegal, as that does not decrease the frequency of abortions, but increases the harm from unsafe abortion attempts. While it is understandable to disagree on whether abortions are morally correct, despite my personal firm stance, abortions should never be illegal.

[@melthefallen4558]

@@NoSpectateAnyone educated on basic female reproductive health. That includes women.

[@thea_therian]

There's something very human about your artstyle that suits the topic being discussed

[@BillCipherisCRINGE]

It's real.

[@hanotes2]

Exactly.

[@ICruz-vq1ze]

As if its not meant to be pretty, just a good representation of what they look like

[@Somefellowhumanbeing]

​@ICruz-vq1ze exactly, i think this is realism in that way because though it doesn't look real, it represents her mind in a very real way.

[@Ewaszczypior1]

The guys taking off their shirt scene reminded me of something when I was young I was about 9 years old and at a lake with my mom. Everyone was jumping in since they had swimsuits or they were boys with underwear, but I didn't wear bras yet. My mom knew I really wanted to go in, so she asked me, "are you comfortable with taking off your shirt in front of others like that?" I didn't care, I didn't understand social norms as an autistic girl either so I undressed to my underwear and I had fun... but everyone else stared at me weird. I felt the pressure to leave, dress up again, and that was the day I learned something I could never verbalise but always understood. Thank you for this video

[@tanjiarahman2474]

The croaky voice sounding like she’s holding back tears just adds the best detail. edit: HOLY SHART I LEFT THIS COMMENT FOR FOUR DAYS AND WORLD WAR 3 IS IN THE COMMENTS

[@mparagames]

yeah...

[@mparagames]

@Otto_von_bismarck5 ????

[@mparagames]

@Otto_von_bismarck5 it's just the way her voice is, if you watch tlher other videos that have nothing to do with this subject, you'll be able to see. Also it's a heavy subject, so of course it could impact her

[@LeilaaaG]

@@King_gurglergirl no way ur gonna come to this comment section to hate. u picked the wrong video for that.

[@XxweirdosxX]

@@King_gurglerim mentioning you on my suicide note with this exact sentence buddy

[@-_cat_-_paws-_]

My grandma didn’t know what sex was until she was in late high school. Her parents just… didn’t ever tell her.

[@Funeral_Mannequin]

Nobody taught me what masturbation actually was and I started at 10. I literally thought I was the first person to do this until I realized at about 13-14.

[@typenamehere2994]

My parents have yet to tell me and I'm graduating high school this year🙂, also we don't have sex ed at school either, the closest thing was learning the body parts in Biology, anything I know comes from curiosity and Google

[@heartutube]

My mother never gave me the talk, I had to use my best friend's teenager book to find out

[@Fhqwads]

Your grandma was blessed with the protection of her innocence ❤

[@Maraku_29]

​@@Funeral_Mannequini started at 9, i realized at 13 too

[@Ilikebugsiguess]

It’s never our faults. It’s the abusers fault. R#pe is disgusting I hate it. My cousin was targeted in a changing room, an adult man taking pictures of her. He never got in trouble for what he did. Because they put down the women to protect the man at all costs.

[@frostandfire7164]

How old was your cousin during the event?

[@hel2727]

@@frostandfire7164 why do you need to know that

[@breigniac-s3f]

@frostandfire7164 why does that matter prick

[@frostandfire7164]

@ Because children are usually less likely to be believed by others

[@frostandfire7164]

@ that might explain why the man didn’t get arrested

[@lucialight2002]

The last line goes very hard, since sexual trauma is something all women are affected by whether it'd be directly or not. The term is called "collective trauma" where groups of people who have similar identities are affected by something whether or not they were there when the event(s) had occurred. It seems that I need to put more context into my statement first of all I should start by saying that I am a sociologist and I study group behavior rather than personal experiences. Secondly I say that all women are AFFECTED by sexual trauma this doesn't mean that all women are traumatized, there are many examples of norms and behaviors that are central to society that have no explanation other than the sexualization of women. Some examples being seen in this video, other being the villainization of women aging or how women treat each other poorly like slut shaming one another. Thirdly, of course men are affected by sexual trauma just because there is a conversation of women being affected doesn't mean that it is meant to belittle or ignore men's experiences. Regarding male's sexual trauma recently is being to be seen that men are actually being affected by things like assault and harassment at similar rates as women but there is heavy under reporting due to norms regarding masculinity (I am very angry at myself for not taking note of the sources when I saw the statics). There is good article by Peretz and Vidmar. 2021. Called “Men, Masculinities, and Gender-Based Violence”. It goes into how men are both perpetrators and victims and the role of male identity plays in gender based violence. I want people to remember that things like trauma affect people outside of the those who are directly affected there are things like generational trauma and communal witnessing. These are all important and play major roles in how people within a society acts and treats one another it isn't seen in only sexual trauma but also racism, poverty, war, IPV, ect. I want everyone to know that there is always someone there for them and that someone does care about them. Here are some resources for people, never feel ashamed to reach out for help. Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673 Struggling or in crisis: texting/calling 988, online chat 988lifeline.org Domestic Violence: calling 1-800-799-7233, texting LOVEIS to 22522

[@pretzell29653]

I personally don't believe women all have sexual trauma especially if nothing happens to them. Women aren't all victims, and while I believe that it's important to recognize the fact that there are many female victims, I just don't agree with saying that every female has sexual trauma. I'm a biological female (a male now) and I don't have any sexual trauma. I was never really sexualized in my opinion. And the same thing could go for men as well if you think about i, but I won't get into it. I could be wrong or not fully understanding your comment though, this is just my thoughts

[@vivvy_0]

@@pretzell29653 And yet it’s almost always everywhere, unavoidable day-to-day and all through history occurrence, greatly effecting one gender more brutality then any other. If it’s not a shared trauma it’s a expected/feared paranoia wound.

[@Choking_Duck]

​@@pretzell29653I also don't have sexually trauma and I'm 20. It feels wrong to be involved in something that didn't happen to me by saying "all women" but idk ; ; Not to be rude! It just makes me feel a lil guilt

[@allisongross2946]

@@pretzell29653 All women absolutely experience sexual trauma. ALL women, from all backgrounds, are sexualized against their will. Such an experience is traumatic for everyone.

[@martlettoo]

​@@pretzell29653 maybe the fact that you were never truly female has altered your viewpoint, just food for thought

[@koikun]

3:15 sick. a sad and heart wrenching line, and so are the rest. this idea has always been shoved down my throat as a child. It is not my job to keep predators away. no girl, no child, no person should have to worry about this. this is not the world we (were made to) live in, it's the world that's been normalized by generations before us. this animation was beautifully done.

[@chrisi7127]

With all due respect, I disagree with some of your points. We should NOT stop teaching children about the dangers and evils in this world, for they will ALWAYS exist. Covering yourself or watching out for certain people will always minimize the risk of being done wrong, and before you say that people still get murdered, raped and hurt; Crime is often an act of opportunity and evil people will always be there, that's why we have prisons and forensic psychiatries.

[@EbbndFl0w]

I am a mother, who was habitually sexually abused as a child. My mother was a teen mom. My sex-ed from her was “sex gets you pregnant”. Anything else technical I learned from school, or online research. Or worse, porn and online research. I don’t want to be that kind of mother to my children where I raise them to fear sex. My daughter is autistic, non speaking. My hope is to properly equip her with knowledge about her human experience in the best way possible, in the most enriching way possible. As weird as it may to type publicly, or say out loud: I want my daughter to have enjoyable sex. If sex is something she wishes to explore when she’s older. I want her to have fun. I want her to be safe, and to be confident, and to be an advocate for herself without fear. It’s her birthright.

[@SnaileyT]

You are a good mother. ❤

[@EbbndFl0w]

@@SnaileyT thank you deeply from the bottom of my heart. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️. This is something I am vehemently passionate about. It’s controversial, but the trauma I experienced from being molested was nothing at all like the trauma received simply from developing into a sexually functional female. All of the societal subtleties I’ve had to unpack and examine were trickier to address than acknowledging the obviously bad thing that happened to me as a child.

[@Itz_Bisz4r]

Exactly! How could someone ever possibly expect you to “defend” yourself from sexual violence if they won’t teach you how to do so, let alone what sex and sexual violence even is? People need to realize that sex education is genuinely so crucial. You are a great mother for actually, oh, I don’t know, caring about your child and _not_ submitting to weird social standards placed on children. (From what I know through a screen, you are, but it’s dumb that I feel like I have to congratulate you for not causing harm to your kids. That should be the bare minimum.) They act like it’s the same as showing a child porn when really, it’s teaching them how their damn body works because once they’re old enough to need that knowledge, they must actually have been taught it and have the information stored! The baffling part about it is that the people who think sex is too inappropriate for developing teenagers- the ones who are sexually developing and NEED to what’s happening to them and that they are not in fact dying every month- are usually the same people who do said inappropriate things to teenagers. But it’s okay when they do it to uninformed CHILDREN (who they chose not to inform of sex), not the horny teenagers who don’t know what they should and shouldn’t do with theirs bodies since they never fucking educated these kids properly.

[@sumiha]

@@EbbndFl0w best wishes to you mama! 🎉❤

[@sammyssandwich]

Bro that's literally true, she doesn't need to tell you anything else, you wokie.

[@Sagethegay]

The part about the clear discharge honestly resonated with me a lot more than it should have. I think it’s because that’s when I realized that reproductive organs and systems were so much more than what I was taught. Hell, I didn’t even know that the v@gina *opened.*

[@alvvaysforever]

i didn’t know that either. knew about periods, knew about sex, but didn’t even know that.

[@Yuk0_Th3_W3r1d0]

Me too. I just learned about what it is by watching this and i looked up what it was. I didnt knkw Discharge was a thing. I just thought it was just me digesting some things weirdly. Now i know.

[@Moonhikko]

THE V@GINA OPEN?!!! 💀💀💀

[@person_cat_thing]

it OPENS?!

[@moonlitdreamers]

i didnt even realize the vagina wasnt the urethra. i thought that when ppl put in tampons they were putting it into a tiny pinprick hole. i also used to think you peed out of the clitoris bc "its like a tiny penis" one day i was exploring at random and suddenly my finger just. went in. scared the shit out of me honestly. teenage me (like 12 or 13) didnt even realize there was a hole that large. i thought the vagina was just the skin between your legs that you pee out of, not an actual hole

[@marymystery4427]

I remember when I was maybe 10-12 I was playing Just Dance, one of my favorite games that made me feel good about exercise too since I was always a bit on the larger side. Then my misogynistic father forced my Mom to have a talk with me about not moving my hips like that because "It makes him uncomfortable" I was a child. His child. He never touched me in any way. But I was still sexualized by him, and I still remember that moment I developed a sudden insecurity to my body. It was awful and took me til my early 20s to break out of it.

[@KVN3H0]

Wtf...

[@Person444i2m]

What way did you move it, cuz sometimes he might be right

[@Spidersarescary-frfr]

@@Person444i2mNo ‘way’ a CHILD will move their body makes it okay to seccualize them???

[@Person444i2m]

@@Spidersarescary-frfr yes it's sexualizing, but at least in my opinion it's to protect them from other creeps

[@parker1443]

​​​@@Person444i2m hips are not sexual. if you are watching a child's hip movements and finding it "sexual," then you are a creep. human brains aren't wired to SEE sexuality in young children, that's why attraction to minors is considered a mental disorder. So no, this person's father is not, in ANY way, in the "right" for that. If it made him so "uncomfortable," no one forced him to watch. It's still creepy as hell that thought ever occured to him in the first place. EDIT: also even if it WAS "just for the sake of 'protecting' OP," why would he be "too uncomfortable" to tell OP himself? Why did he have to go get mommy about it? His avoidance of dishing out that supposedly "good-natured advice" himself is very telling of his mindset.

[@starstorm1267]

My grandparents are very religious, and never told my mom about puberty. So when she first got her period, she screamed and cried thinking that she was dying. That’s when my grandmother finally explained to her what it was, and that it was perfectly normal. My mom made sure both me and my sister were properly educated on our upcoming puberties after that. She didn’t want us going through the same thing she went through.

[@Paws_4_hands]

“ Sometimes I worry that I shouldn’t be allowed to make art about s3xu@l trauma because I’m not a survivor, *but then I remember that I am a woman* “ HITS SO HARD. The constant feeling that your body is being s3xualized. Just because I’m a WOMAN. This world we live in is horrible. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, should have to worry about this.

[@Danka42]

It's not like SA is the only type of sexual trauma one can experience

[@Bluzthedrpepperprincess]

Thank you

[@Number1.Shellvision_shipper]

THIS!

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

And when you say it like that, it sounds like it should be obvious... but we've all been taught that either it's r*pe or it doesn't matter.

[@Idiotic_B_Purcell]

PREACH SISTER

[@Th3Reel._.No0dLe]

This short film has helped me to understand that even if you don't know it yet, there's a chance you've been sexualized and have trauma, even if it isn't from r^pe.

[@Paguinun]

I don’t get it guysss

[@sammyssandwich]

I don't have trauma, idiot. The worst trauma I had is me having explosive diarrhea in the toilet.

[@schemesthefox1255]

⁠@@Paguinun Layze spotted!! Though to answer your question, this video is about how women aren’t told about their bodies and that they’ll always be sexualized no matter what they do.

[@donttalktomeplzimsad]

i have that trauma.

[@I.am.hooked]

@@donttalktomeplzimsadme too.

[@shadowbear1231]

This is an amazing peice of art. Makes me wanna throw up. Im not a woman, but i was raped as a child. I fucking hate this planet, i hate its monsters. I hate the culture its built. Im so sorry. Words couldnt do it justice. I hope your voice isnt cencored because youtube deems this not advertiser friendly. This shit is important. Yall are loved, please stay safe.

[@Person444i2m]

This needs to be censored to kids, but I feel bad for you for what you've have to go through

[@nenahaha]

​@@Person444i2m would be okay for teens. But children needs to know this message. If I ever make it to have kids/raise kids, I'm giving them every thing i was rejected. Let it be freedom to wear (im not even talking about crop tops, just a shirt and shorts with socks.) or their gender identity.

[@Person444i2m]

@@nenahaha it's way too mature for kids, best if you explain it to middle schoolers

[@sammyssandwich]

@@nenahaha "Gender identity" that crap is bullcrap. Your identity is what you actually are, not what you decide to make up one day. Your real "gender identity" is your real gender that you are born with.

[@sammyssandwich]

Shut up, this is the only planet that is good for life. And people dressing inappropriately makes you more likely to get r*ped and it's just people trying to avoid it.

[@shawanaaa]

It truly hurts how even as a young child you are sexualized and told your body is something to hide and be ashamed of. As a girl I have never felt comfortable or safe in my own body, largely because of how i grew up, shaving my legs, wearing baggy clothes, feeling ashamed of my period. The biggest issue is that it’s normal. Most girls feel the same way….That last line made me tear up a bit.

[@usernameworkinprogress]

"Sex is an act of reproduction or violence where a cis man penetrates a cis woman" is so relatable: i thought sex was about men's pleasure for which women had to feel pain for and patiently wait for them to finish. I actively thought so until i was around 14, but I kept it unconsciously internalized for many more years, even after having had sex with many people. I'm still working on having a healthy relationship with sex

[@glassheartsx]

Same here, that is the worst feeling, and I'm 30 years old. I'm still actively working to unlearn it to this day.

[@Skyset_angel]

That’s similar to my thoughts I ignored men until 18 cause they were too young and foolish. Tbh I didn’t get a nice guy until 30 and again at 35.

[@lxverbioyzzz]

I’m a guy, and knowing this is how my sister may feel breaks me. I’ve had my highschool friends make terrible jokes about my sister who was in middle school. Sexual jokes. It makes me so hurt inside to know the suffering my sister may go through that I could never understand.

[@vivvy_0]

did you at least confront these guys? like how deranged can boys be..

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

Just by being here, you're understanding more than most men ever will. Thank you. Keep researching, talk to your sister, and any other women in your life. Male understanding of the female experience is the silver bullet.

[@Cocollyt]

Say something when you see it dude.

[@bupirochi]

Confront and protect your sister, those are predators

[@King_gurgler]

this has nothing to do with being modest in fact only an immodest society would mock a womans body like that

[@beesw_rm]

This hits so close to home that it’s a little scary. I hate how normalized it is to sexualize the bodies of CHILDREN just because of their gender. I’m AFAB and a survivor and i feel like I can’t think about my body without sexualizing it. I used to wear clothes that were a little tight on me when I was little because i was kinda chubby and grew out of my clothes fast. I didn’t even realize how “weird” that might be to some people until I started getting comments. My mom even accused me of trying to wear “form fitting” clothes on purpose. I wasn’t even ten yet, I didn’t know what I was doing. I hate how dirty I felt (and still feel) about things I couldn’t even control. I hate how okay it is for me to be sexualized, even in small ways, for doing the horrible crime of going through puberty. Thank you for this video because we need more like this.

[@SnaileyT]

That's disgusting to say a literal CHILD is trying to show off their body! Shame on your mom for saying that!

[@sammyssandwich]

Your username is a lie, you hate bees, you love to torture them just because they're insects.

[@Collateralldamagethe3rd]

@@sammyssandwich ???

[@beesw_rm]

@@Collateralldamagethe3rd pretty sure that’s just a kid trying to get attention lol

[@sammyssandwich]

@@Collateralldamagethe3rd This idiot is a crinny wokie, I doubt she cares about bees, she thinks bees are useless insects. Every wokie I see hates nature and wants to kill birds just because their singing is "annoying"

[@ameliahanvelt5515]

“But then I remember that I am a woman.” That one hit

[@shortcake-nu4bn]

Even when I'm not an SA victim, it's scary about how I still get it. I've always wondered WHY the female chest is sexualized, and I never exactly got a clear answer. Genuinely I just thought it was the exact same as a male's chest but increased in size. I don't get why nudity is sexualized in general, like "Ooooh spooky!! Human anatomy!!" We all have it, we shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable with what we have just because one is different from the other. No one should have to feel like they're trapped in their bodies and feel like they're disgusting for it. It shouldn't have to be an uncomfortable discussion to talk about, but because of how publicized it's become, we really have no choice. I wish the female body was normalized.

[@Person444i2m]

What do you mean by normalized

[@Paguinun]

@@Person444i2mwhy is it sexualized?? It’s human anatomy

[@TH3BIGG3STBIRD]

Real

[@Remly_]

Pop off queen!!

[@AmieMorley-st6tz]

​@@Person444i2m Normalised. Made normal. Not sexualised, just seen as any other organ.

[@noodlewater3876]

We need to normalize not hurting kids in this way. Instead of telling children “that’s immodest” or “keep your clothes on,” we need to just tell them how “those parts are for us, and no one else should see or touch them.” We need to stop making sex and anatomy such a taboo subject. We need to start telling little girls what a period is, and everything that comes with it. Instead of “it just happens” or “that’s normal,” explain to them why it happens “discharge is like hand sanitizer for your vagina, it keeps it clean to prevent infections.” And “the blood is from your uterus, it sheds its lining in its monthly cleaning cycle for it to stay healthy.”

[@asillygoofygoober]

Tysm(I finally know what discharge actually is because my brain is smooth smoothy, empty, no thoughts, peaceful)

[@noodlewater3876]

@ 😭😭

[@King_gurgler]

that is a really good comment modesty should be encouraged but i agree that we still should teach young girls about that stuff

[@LUK4_L3TH4LLL]

The discharge hit very close and dear. Once it started appearing, I kept my mouth shut. I was taught to stay quiet about my body because it was “too sexual”, vulgar, inappropriate. I had no idea what was happening but I still stayed silent. It wasn’t worth getting in trouble for.

[@Idiotic_B_Purcell]

Just a reminder that curiosity in no way killed the cat, hon

[@venikav4024]

In the summer, I sometimes walk around in my bra and shorts And my mom says to put on a shirt So i say “but dad doesn’t wear one” She says “yeah and you’re a girl” I say “that’s why i’m wearing a bra” Like cmon

[@yourdad3275]

⁠​⁠@@manomoney41more than a few people are aroused by men’s body parts but no one gives men grief about that

[@lemonstudios8617]

@@manomoney41 their problem. why are ppl acting like its the girl's responsibility to stop that from happening?

[@Funeral_Mannequin]

@manomoney41 Yeah, and there’s some people that are aroused by feet and elbows. So?

[@allisongross2946]

@@kaijotten If at least two men are that way, then the phrase "men do that" is factually accurate. If you feel targeted when women talk about their trauma, that is for YOU to unpack.

[@Choking_Duck]

​@@allisongross2946How would you like it if a someone said "women are terrible drivers"?

[@keatonhannen1124]

When I was a kid, I got my first period just before a girls' summer camp. I was relieved knowing I would be surrounded by people who understood. I was late to the pool because I had to use a tampon for the first time. I told my friends when they asked. They told me I was disgusting. I didn't have friends anymore for the rest of the trip.

[@hari-l7k]

im so sorry :c those are fake friends.. i hope you don’t hang out with them since

[@tartarsosu]

You arent their mirror btw why did they say disgusting actually

[@yh0o]

⁠​⁠@@tartarsosu considering they just got their first period, they were probably very young and their friends were likely around their age too..so maybe they havent gotten their periods yet and just went off of whatever their parents taught them. also op mentioned they used a tampon and ik a lot of ppl feel iffy about tampons bc they think using a tampon is the same as losing your virginity, so that could be another reason.

[@Estella_alsoknownasgabi123]

It's disgusting how people can get so immature right when someone is dealing with puberty. I remember when I was about 10 I was on my second period ever and I was swimming with my friends and a cousin. My cousin (he's a BOY and so are the 2 other) joked about asking if I was on my period and I said I wasn't then I pulled my friend aside and told her I was on it and asked her not to tell anyone but instead she told everyone and made me really upset because they started teasing me and calling me weird because I was growing up. I was a 10 year old.

[@serena3673]

​@@Estella_alsoknownasgabi123 Are you both still friends

[@misanthrope.antelope]

I'm oddly thankful this came up in my recommended. My mom sexualizes me for even slightly showing my cleavage or wearing a dress shorter than normal as if it's MY responsibility to keep creeps away. I just wanted to wear something that was stylish and made me happy. It makes me feel so angry and hurt, but seeing these comments made me feel like it's gonna be okay.

[@misanthrope.antelope]

My ex-friend back in middle school used to say it was possible to get pregnant without anything happening and that scared me. I believed her. Looking back on it, it makes me feel pity for her because she wasn't taught proper sex-ed which ultimately caused a chain reaction with me. I literally believed what she told me.

[@mparagames]

​@@misanthrope.antelope that must have been scary to believe tbh

[@gigiwallace6645]

I’m having a daughter and I plan on telling her about her anatomy as soon as she can speak sentences. Not teaching your child sex ed won’t prevent them from being abused. I didn’t even know that one day I’d lose my flat chest and become a woman but I knew that someone kept touching me and hurting me. I was scolded for sitting with my legs uncrossed and playing outside because I was a girl child. My daughter will not go through that.

[@akemi_0]

W parenting

[@Iloveroyalehigh]

I get where you’re coming from and I totally understand x but if you tell your daughter too early she might go around telling other kids and stuff x.

[@anzaia2164]

​@@Iloveroyalehigh good

[@TekkenKazama]

Please when she grows up encourage her to do physical tasks like running and other exercises like pushups and weight lifting upto her limits only and push those limits slowly with pace. This will give her a HUGE boost in confidence because in this era where every other women are restricted if she gets such freedom she would be so proud of herself and you too. Also never let her use swear words even in anger or frustration and even when she grows up. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART. See these swear words are the real TRAP once you start using them a believe start to grow inside that being women is bad/weak/etc. the meaning behind these words are totally against women as a whole. At the end its upto you miss.

[@TekkenKazama]

​@@Iloveroyalehigh It will get awkward but we need to start somewhere or nothing will change

[@Isabuggaboo]

The way you drew yourself is how I see my body. To some, the way this is portrayed might seem disgusting. But to me, it just is. This entire film is so raw and so real. What's more, as an asexual, knowing that I'm sexualized simply by existing is always so scary to me. And even though I'm ace, I know talking about s ex is very important. I'm hoping our rights only expand in the future. Women deserve the right to education and a world where they feel safe.

[@theyoftheravens]

*waves in enby demisexual* yeah this short film hit very, very deep. And as a US citizen I'm definitely worried about our rights in the future. The massive spike in maternal deaths since Roe was overturned, the fact that some politicians *count on teen pregnancies* as a population booster and have said that education about pregnancy and STIs ect could threaten their power, the voices of "your body my choice" that started ringing out.... we've gotta band together and protect each other. 💛

[@ticcitoasty]

@@Isabuggaboo yea i mean being asexual doesn’t make sex ed less important. if anything i think it becomes more important. being able to talk and normalize different sexualities including a lack of sexual attraction.

[@Idiotic_B_Purcell]

Hopefully you're not in any state that has these things called "Marriage Consummation Laws" . Basically what consummating marriage means if you're curious, the States that enact 'em, require you to do the sex when you're married, or else it ain't valid. I'm not ace, but to know that the laws exist is kinda disgusting. I mean, so much for the romantic type of aces' dreams of walking down the aisle. Like, unless it's abuse, whom are you to judge someone's sex life, huh?

[@urcryingteacup]

“but then i remember that i am a woman” something in me is bleeding at those words in all the metaphorical ways that can be. in the world in the way it is, it’s sexual to exist as a woman. that’s not right, but it is. watching this, i resonated with a lot of it, i’m also bisexual, i’ve gotten the window comment from my own mother, i’ve always been insecure about my hair, i’ve recently discovered that chances i’m autistic are high. sometimes i think this world isn’t made for women, but maybe it’s just that they’ve taken this place where we belong and hidden it away so that we search and we search and all we get is stares and fear and self responsibility for something that isn’t our fault and we never belong, not when society, particularly men, still see every aspect of our very existence as sexual.

[@sparkxii.]

Society says women should be modest, but at the same time, accept even the most basic attributes of ourselves being sexualized at every turn. Everyone else seems to have a say on what we should do with our bodies but us. This is a fantastic short film, and you are an expert storyteller. I can really relate to this, thank you for creating this.

[@lyssbrewley498]

This was so, so poignant to me. As someone else who was undiagnosed autistic + AFAB growing up in Western Canada, so many of these memories of yours are echoed in mine. Thank you for scripting, writing, illustrating, animating and voicing this. Fundamentally, I do think it's harmful that parents and siblings and friends, instead of challenging the society that sexualizes feminine children and teens' bodies, try to force the burden of responsiblity onto us. It's a form of sexual trauma that inherently shapes how we act and think in life, and it refuses to acknowledge that for every victim of SA, there is a perpetrator. People act like the people around them in life couldn't possibly act out with that sort of violence, and it's just not true.

[@легушачьяжабка]

the last quote hits so close home.. women are sexualized literally from day one and THIS IS sexual trauma. and it's why I believe rape is much more detrimental to women's psyche, like retraumatization. amazing work, I wish the best for you❤

[@donttalktomeplzimsad]

exactly. i think it effects women more because it opens up a wound that has been bleeding for years whereas that's not the case for men.

[@galaxychill9578]

idk i feel like we shouldn't look down on men's traumas, saying this as an AFAB person btw

[@donttalktomeplzimsad]

@@galaxychill9578 no one was doing that. I didn't feel like clarifying that of course men's traumas are awful as well because i think it's ony common sense. what i meant was that women's sexual traumas are on a whole other dimension.

[@donttalktomeplzimsad]

@@galaxychill9578 idk where my reply went but I said no one here was looking down on men's trauma i just didn't feel like clarifying that trauma is awful for everyone cause it's ony common sense.

[@легушачьяжабка]

@@galaxychill9578 no one looks down on men's trauma tho. like the commenter above said it's just too different. also I think it's kind of inconsiderate to shift attention to men's issues here, considering that women haven't been able to talk about all this abuse for many years. not trying to be negative, just clarifying some things

[@enchanteds0N]

as a trans guy this hit way too close to home. there's something so traumatizing about growing up afab, and/or being a woman that shows how much society will deem normal bodily functions or body parts as "too sexual" or "disgusting".

[@naranciaghirga2527]

🏳️‍⚧️🔫

[@ness.39]

Same, I'm transmasc and it bugs me so much how society sees our bodies as sexual and normal things that happen to us as weird and disgusting when it's natural and it's something we go through, like, it's just me, does that mean I'm disgusting? Is our mere existence sexual? There's nothing wrong with it. I hate this.

[@Moxielovesdaanimals]

Holy sh*t the fact that some SA victims think it’s at all their fault for “wearing short skirts” or even men for “take off their shirts to cool down” and so much more it actually a horrifying fact. My older brother was sexually assaulted by a girl in the grade below him and only told me because he thought it would show he was weak. (He was born prematurely and the girl was held back 2 years so was technically older than him.) I wanted to barf, cry, and be strong for him at the exact same moment. It’s terrible how he was taught that it was embarrassing that he was r*ped. Two more of my brothers have come to me and told me about things they would never tell our parents because they didn’t want to be “weak” one of these things were that my 6 year old brother was hit and kicked in the ribs by an 5th grade girl. The stereotype that boys can’t be hurt my girls or they are “weak” is disgusting. I know this is somewhat the same for girls.

[@ticcitoasty]

@@Moxielovesdaanimals yea this is exactly what ppl mean when they say patriarchy hurts all of us. boys get taught they have to suck it up and be strong while girls get told they have to be obedient and be the perfect daughter/girlfriend/wife/mother/etc

[@humanbean4037]

That’s horrific. Women are just as capable of extreme violence as men are, it just doesn’t happen as much bc not as many women are in a position to be able to do so. There is no shame in being a woman’s victim. A human hurt another human. That is all

[@Whispense]

this actually gave me chills. i’ve never seen this represented anywhere and it’s not like i could ever talk about it with anyone because every time i did i was shut down and told to “stop being a little _____ and take your double standards somewhere else” and i believed it. oh my gosh i actually can’t believe this is being discussed this feels so big for me. i can’t even tell if my gender dysphoria is genuine or brought on by these experiences and it hurts badly.

[@aitanacruz9882]

@@Whispense I think I understand, I hate being female sometimes and resent it but I also don't feel dysphoric the way trans people do... I can't speak for you though. I recommend you talk to people with gender dysphoria.

[@AzunaTheDragonStone]

Gender has always been a strange experience for myself as well. Why were rules and norms pushed on me? Why could I not be like my brothers? Why was my body so different. Puberty hit and... I still look at myself and question why must I conform to what others see of me. I love and accept myself after a lifetime of not. I found my niche with friends and loved ones who understand personally. But all those formative years where I was shamed for being born "woman"? Crushing. Gaining weight just emphasizes the parts I dislike.

[@hithereeee1]

THIS. exactly this. oh my goodness. statistically, i believe there are more trans men than trans women (saw this in an older study, not sure if its still valid now), and sometimes i genuinely wonder if that has to be a societal thing where afab’s gender and body dysphoria are more frequent or intense because of how we are treated societally. because as someone under the trans umbrella who was born female, i know growing up the way i was treated by everyone around me was SO frustrating and made me so viscerally disgusted and uncomfortable with the parts of my body that made me female, whilst i was comfortable with the rest of myself, and that still carries onto now.

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

I used to think I wasn't a girl. For me it was my autism. I was so desperate to find my people, and so desperate for answers as to why I was just _a little different_ from everyone else. I found people I related to among lgbtq+ folk. I made assumptions. I thought of, and treated my body badly because of those false assumptions. I even considered ODing on an estrogen-reducing pill I need. Who knows what that could've done. All I can say is, be gentle with yourself. Explore your feelings deeply and openly. You don't have to tell anyone anything-that brings on pressure to stay the same, or to pretend you are what you once incorrectly thought yourself to be. And this one may be less likable but... let your body be. Please. Gender, as it is thought of today, is a whole messy blob of expectations and stereotypes and discrimination. Your body has no part in that. Don't drag it in. I love you.

[@hithereeee1]

@@DreamtaleEnjoyer i know you mean well but half the things you said are really harmful thing transphobes have and do say to trans people. your experience with your gender should not be pushed onto others like that. the trans regret rate for transitioning is statistically less than 1%. gender change treatment is therapy and medical treatment, the same way any other treatment for anything else would be. youre basically telling people not to seek professional treatment to stop the bad things theyre feeling. thanks for the thought, though.

[@randomgoats]

I noticed recently that the boxes of pads in my house have a domestic abuse hotline printed on the lid. It gave me such a weird feeling, and I don't quite know how to put it into words but this film made me feel the same way. Like I was just sitting there bleeding on the toilet and looking at this number to call if I'm being abused and thought "fuck, is this what it means to be female?"

[@dii4741]

Ive been sexualized long before i knew what that word was, and abused even longer than i can form memories, and this hit all the same notes that ive been dealing with mentally (Edit) I'm both glad and deeply empathetic that so many people resonate with what I've said. May brighter roads and greener pastures await all of us on this rocky path we call life.

[@cheshire4666]

as a survivor myself, no you're absolutely allowed to talk and make art about this. as a survivor, this is extremely comforting to hear addressed and it needs discussed, regardless in what way its affected you personally. it hurts us all in the end.

[@droogiebabydoll]

From ages 5-8, I was SA’ed by a maid who worked at my house. I told my parents about it, and they ignored it telling me that our maid might behave a little weird because she had schizophrenia (and also because they thought I was still a child and because it was a woman who I accused)

[@SwedenSwissCheese]

I’m so sorry bro. That should never happen. Stuff like this is the only thing that makes me sick to my stomach.

[@TheBigJayAgenda]

Schizophrenia is never an excuse. They’re ableist for using that to justify it.

[@whitneycloud9419]

Have you ever gone to therapy about this? It won't 'get you over it,' but it can give you ways to deal with the trauma. Hugs!

[@cawingcrows2072]

I am so fucking sorry holy shit I hopw you're in a safer place now where you have the space to heal 🫂

[@Idiotic_B_Purcell]

Say it with me folks: 👏🏻IT'S👏🏻NOT👏🏻ONLY👏🏻GUYS👏🏻

[@afish4086]

This piece means so much to me. Thank you so much for making it. I am a survivor of many SA incidents. I have volunteered and participated in many SA advocacy events and groups. Every survivor I have met, no matter how horrific their story, has said something to the effect of "my trauma doesn't count. Everyone else has had it worse than me." Your experiences matter. Your voice and observations matter. This art has added a very important to the on-going discussion about r*pe culture and how it effects everyone. Thank you for making this!!

[@deeb13243]

I'm a transgender girl. I've been sexually harassed and I've had some *really really* uncomfortable sexual encounters (though I did consent in those encounters for some fucking reason), but I have never been sexually assaulted. This and the fact that I'm not an AFAB makes me feel like I just simply can't understand all of the stuff about societally-ingrained sexualisation of women's bodies, even though I really try to, because I don't really have one. I like both men and women. Yet I sort of feel guilty when I have romantic interest in females? I feel like, because I don't feel as though I can ever fully understand, that I'm somehow making it worse, or doing these bad things. Though I don't feel like I'm doing that when I think more romantically about men. Perhaps it's that I don't feel qualified to understand, so I convince myself I can't understand? I don't know, maybe you'd have something that could make me understand more. Sorry, I don't mean to annoyingly ask for help, I'm just putting my thoughts out there. Also, I can relate to your statement of how people have said that their trauma doesn't count, just in a different way. Perhaps this is irrelevant, perhaps I don't understand, perhaps I'm intruding on a group I'll never truly belong in, but the way I can relate is with my gender disphoria - I always felt as though my disphoria was stupid and petty, a total joke, compared to the extreme and excessive pain cis females have to endure on their periods, and as I'm a fairly empathetic person I'd sort of hate myself and think my problems are completely invalid because some of my cis female friends told me how lucky I was for not having to deal with cramps. This is kind of random, just a random bit of my thoughts. Maybe someone would have something to say. Last, I have utmost respect and solemnity and sadness for you as an SA survivor. I felt disgusted for having a random creepy guy touch my arm sensually. I can hardly even imagine how terrible that would feel, and I wish you the best.

[@Person444i2m]

You sound like a therapist

[@deeb13243]

@@Person444i2m Me, or afish4086?

[@callmecharlie4250]

​​@@deeb13243 it sounds like you listen and you care about the differing experiences of others and try your best to act your best towards them with those experiences in mind. I believe that is enough. your experiences as yourself and the hardships you face personally are also valid and deserving of that same care. I don't think it matters if your life experiences match others because in the end nobody will know exactly what it's like to be another person-as long as you do your best to understand what it means to them. (also some cis women don't cramp and some trans women do, so it's not necessarily an either or thing and you really aren't that far outside of the experience in that regard. I fully accept you as one of the girls regardless of your cramping status) as a pan/ace(idfkitsamess) woman, I will say I don't see any inherent reason not to date you? existing doesn't make you predatory.

[@deeb13243]

@@callmecharlie4250 thanks a lot! That's really kind of you.

[@Snyhex]

I sobbed as I finished the video because, aside from having autism, this is exactly how I spent my entire childhood and how I used to think.. I remember when I first got my period at the age of 9, my mom threw a pad at me and expected me to know how to wear it. Whenever my period was late, she'd say things like "I know that you're having ..... with the teachers/older men in your primary school" or generally assumes that I'm pregnant. And when I got r@ed by my older brother at 6, she said it was my fault for staying alone with him.

[@theyoftheravens]

God that's so fucked up. I'm so sorry you went through that stranger. 🫂

[@Jada-ky4ci]

That's absolutely terrible. I'm a guy and I have a little sister who's not even 15 yet and I personally know that parents try to separate siblings of different genders. It makes me sad, but I understand that parents want to use fear to keep their girls safe. It's f--ed up that she blamed it on you though and I truly feel sorry for women sometimes because it seems that they have the mental baggage of protecting themselves from abuse by acting scared and overly cautious. I don't know the solution to this, so I tell BOTH my lil brother and sister to cover up when they're at home unless it's hot coz I realized a while back how unfair it is to only push girls in this direction after meeting this girl that I really liked and hearing her say some things about just being a girl. Human society is so weird

[@Skyset_angel]

Holy $hit… I’m so sorry that’s fu€£ed up. Not right! God give you strength.

[@TheBigJayAgenda]

@@Skyset_angelTry to be realistic here

[@inski666]

I am SO sorry.

[@watermylove4530]

I'm a trans dude, and Jesus Christ does it hit home. "My body isn't mine" that's what I've felt since starting puberty.

[@Coyoteonthemoon]

The fact this is the only comment not hearted worries me. You're not alone man, I felt that discomfort from a young age. And I feel part of that confusion comes from not understanding why other men get to express themselves fully while we're still tied to the (bogus) modesty culture of women.

[@Maggot-t7c]

It's not hearted because its a very recent comment

[@watermylove4530]

@@Coyoteonthemoon 🫂 yeah dude. It sucks so much

[@shapexifterr7067]

I felt this. Plus my mom also essentially took control of my body. Wants me to dress in her style, can touch me however she wants. The only way I got control of my body was to develop anorexia :( cuz then at least I won’t get a period or grow a chest. At least then I’m in control…

[@chimericalbeast]

@@shapexifterr7067 Are you recovering? Anorexia is not the answer. Tissue still develops even if the fat around it doesn’t. If you are so starved that you are not having a cycle, that is doing a number on your bones and your muscles. It can become addicting, and something like 33% do not survive. If your mom is touching your body in a way that you are uncomfortable with, that is not okay. Are you afraid to tell her that she is making you uncomfortable? Does she already know? Is there another adult you can confide in?

[@JustAnotherArtist1367]

My body has always been talked about. I’m naturally very skinny. Since I was a young child. “You’re so tall” “you’re so thin” “your husband is going to be very happy” is what I’ve heard all my life. I don’t know if that’s generally close to what is featured in the video.

[@LeilaaaG]

this is me too. but as a kid, my friends and family would poke fun at my small boobs and my nonexistent butt. it’s not like i changed, i just found better friends and i finally shed the insecurity.

[@JustAnotherArtist1367]

@ my older sister used to make fun of my premature chest. We’re on better terms now, and I’m glad you got better friends!

[@organeater101]

I’ve always thought sex was something for men, and woman are expected to give it to them, my view on it has always been giving your body to someone else and due to that I struggle to fall in love or build romantic relationships because I don’t want to “give” my body to someone. It’s hard to get out of a mindset you grew up living by

[@BlackbeltHitoshi]

Ever heard of femdom?

[@King_gurgler]

s** is for a couple not for men or for women but to strengthen bonds and maybe reproduce

[@inski666]

Lowkey felt. I'm sorry.

[@BlackbeltHitoshi]

@@organeater101ever heard of female domination?

[@strawberry-rl6oy]

Remember: a society that pushed women to be modest is also one where men are able to watch porn without it being seen as weird. It is a core symptom of patriarchy, modesty being used a tool of control. Specifically, controlling women's bodies and limiting their movement increases their availability for men, as it makes them reliant on them as protectors from the same sexual violence that other men engage in.

[@delone5935]

Its not a reason to take off your clothes, its a reason to ban porn, two wrongs dont make anything right

[@AmieMorley-st6tz]

​@delone5935 You missed the entire f*cking point, didn't you? The point is, no matter what young girls and women do, our bodies are always sexualised. It doesn't matter if we're taking our clothes off for a non sexual reason. No one said it's a reason to take off our clothes????

[@mydeershikaxoxoga]

​@@delone5935Taking clothes off is not wrong. Seeing body as inherently sexual is.

[@delone5935]

@@mydeershikaxoxoga Nobody ever told that my body is inherently sexual, but what is I cover with underwear, taking off your clothes is ok/not ok under different context, here in Europe no one will care if you are naked but dont expect to be treated with respect.

[@mydeershikaxoxoga]

@@delone5935 Here in Europe I expect human respect regardless of someone's nakedness unless they hurt someone.

[@frogblehfrog143]

I remember when my brother said "Ew, why is she shirtless?" when my mum showed us both old photos of us; I think I was like 7, shirtless because it was hot or somethin. I was flat chested so it's not like I was overweight and it 'looked' like I had breasts. I'm glad that I stood up for myself and just said "Dude, I was 7." to him instead of just letting it slide. My mum has always wanted to treat my brother and I equally but there's always been so much more shame around my body compared to his. When my mum finally told me what a period was (Knew before then but still) she asked me to come into her room, shut the door and started whispering, explaining it to me. Now, whenever I say I feel sick she whispers "Is it your period?". She whispers it like it would kill her to say it aloud, asking me when no one else is around like she's asking me if I commited a felony. It's insane how there is so much shame and disgust around the female body, even though I don't care what other think, I have never shaved, never even thought of buying a bra, but I still carry this shame around with me. Not being rude about my brother but he does have a bigger chest than me, and yet he can walk around shirtless, in his boxers but I can't? Because I am a female? Getting into radical feminism helped me understand stuff a lot more tbh. Also, is anyone else's mom obsessed of remind them that they have breasts? it's always bra this, you "flashed" me this (Not actual flashing, literally like putting deodorant on, and accidentally lifting your shirt up too high), and I really don't get it. I'm gender non conforming but I'm still a teenager girl.

[@hithereeee1]

augh, i feel this. my father has a bigger chest than me but whenever im shirtless its a big deal. its sexualization. my mother also jokes about being flashed by me, and makes comments when im shirtless. the purpose of female breasts- should they NEED a purpose, and they do not the same way male breasts do not -is for breastfeeding. it is not even linked to anything sexual. in fact, its GROSS that people can perceive that as sexual. yet all the same, little girls are told to cover their shoulders whilst their male peers wear tank tops, their uniforms require skirts but “not too short!” skirts. toddler clothing is made horrendously tight for the girls. nothing about children is sexual. the mere thought is disturbing. but all the same, women cannot feel comfortable even in their own homes with their shirts off, let alone their bras. little girls have to wear swim wear that covers their chests whilst their brothers do not. all of it is just really sick and gross. it is not a female’s job, regardless of their appearance nor their age, to “cover up” for anyone unless they are more comfortable that way. the mere idea of seeing a picture of myself when i was younger and the person im with going “ew, why were you shirtless?” makes me incredibly uncomfortable.

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

Ohhh periods. I have had a journey with my periods. And I've only had them for around 6.5 years. My mom way underplayed it when she warned me ("you'll see a little spot of blood in your underwear"). First one I got on vacation in a secluded cabin. Looked black. Had to use folded paper towels as a "pad," which was quite visible through my leggings. That jump-started my shame around it, and I was trying to open pads silently in MY OWN HOME for way too long. Then my periods started bringing along horrible, horrible cramps. Curled up on the floor freely leaking tears kind of cramps. That forced me to talk about it. Thankfully that's been treatable with some various hormone therapy, and at some point I realized being all hush-hush was just. Dumb. I talk about my periods openly now. Even with men around, even TO men. Every woman I've talked about it with has seemed grateful, and shared her own experiences. I love having open conversations about all the weird body happenings (periods, body hair, even intimate experiences) with my sister. Truly, everyone needs someone like my sister in their life to help them open up. And the best part? I RIP open pads now. The darn things can't be quiet no matter how hard you try anyway!!!

[@ambroseghost1351]

I'm a CSA saviour and this hits home. Everything about this work of art is so beautiful and impactful. Never feel bad about talking about your sexual trauma. Everyone deserves to have a voice. When I was 15 I was taken advantage of by an 18 year old who SA'ed me and did other horrible stuff to me because I trusted him and loved him. I have been told by multiple CSA victims that my trauma isn't "valid" because our age gap wasn't that big and I consented to some of the acts despite me being groomed and being under the age of consent . I can understand how hurtful it is when people invalid your sexual trauma. You don't have to be a saviour of SA for your sexual trauma to be valid. Your sexual trauma made an impact on you and traumaised you. Your experiences are enough. You deserve to be heard. Never hold back on raising your voice to bring awareness on the wrongs within this world.

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

If you, at any point in time, can come to the conclusion that you did not give explicit, fully-informed consent... it was abuse.

[@ambroseghost1351]

@@DreamtaleEnjoyer I can remember a few times where I didn’t give consent but either way it was wrong. The fact that I was a CHILD who’s boundaries wasn’t respected makes this even worse. An adult should never ever be having sexual intercourse with a minor. Weither I gave consent or not this is legally and morally wrong to do. You can be charged as a sex offender even if consent was given. The fact that you think a child can consent to these acts with an adult is actually scary. Minors do not fully understand consent or boundaries yet so they don’t understand the gravity of sharing intimacy with someone which can lead to them being exploited and hurt which is exactly what happened to me.

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

@@ambroseghost1351 Okay let me elaborate a little- "fully-informed" also means fully understanding of the situation, your autonomy, the consequences of your choices, etc. A child is not capable of that. Yes. A child cannot give consent. It is terrifying some people can manage to argue they can. I'm definitely not among them! Sorry for the confusion.

[@ambroseghost1351]

@ Oh sorry I completely misunderstood what you were saying. Sorry for lashing out and yes you are right.

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

@@ambroseghost1351 No worries, I know this is a very touchy subject

[@ValeriansDen]

It’s so disgusting that people can’t be taught normal things when they hit puberty and should know about the world.. Most children around that age (including myself) feel uncomfortable with talking about it, and it absolutely breaks my heart. Thank you for making this masterpiece, the art and time creating this was worth it

[@shiarochka3159]

I'm from Russia, and in Russia we don't have any sex ed in school. You are forbidden to talk about it, and nobody is going to teach you about it. When I moved to America, I was shocked that they talked about reproductive system at all

[@cupcaketv5673]

I never really understood why I've felt so much shame and guilt about my sexuality. Or why the thought of actually engaging in sex, involving genitals, repulses me, why I cope with the thought of that or of pregnancy by imagining myself stabbing my stomach with a knife repeatedly, or why the discussion of sexual assault makes me so mentally and physically uncomfortable that it feels like I went through something of my own. I never understood it. After all, nothing directly happened to me, and I had sex ed in school that talked about reproduction. This video made me tear up. Thank you for making it.

[@amiable_monster]

I feel the same. It's really confusing having sexual desires yet also feeling repulsed by idea of Someone finding you sexually attractive. And every time SA brought up or just sexualisation of women displayed i just want to pull my skin off. Feels like my own body restricts potential i have as a person.

[@cupcaketv5673]

@amiable_monster Yeah, exactly. And that's why I'm always confused about whether I'm on the asexual spectrum and/or whether I went though more than I thought and my mind just "erased" that memory and/or whether it's "just" shame, though I don't 100% where it comes from ...

[@amiable_monster]

@@cupcaketv5673 Are you my twin? That's exactly how i feel!

[@cupcaketv5673]

@@amiable_monster 😅🥲 I'm rooting for us to figure this out

[@AltBunny1324]

This was really needed. I was a sa and grape victim and this made me slightly feel better that people are talking about this I started to cry thank you for making this

[@SnaileyT]

I hope you are doing better now. ❤

[@AltBunny1324]

@SnaileyT hope you are too! It takes alot to put out a video like this

[@sammyssandwich]

Bro just say the word idiot instead of ruining the name of a fruit.

[@AltBunny1324]

@sammyssandwich it's for TW. It's better to say that then anything

[@sammyssandwich]

@@AltBunny1324 That doesn't change anything, it just gives them a new trigger word. Now they will get triggers from hearing about grapes.

[@The_T_Drawing_D_Board_B]

As a child, I was never taught about any of this. I only found out when I was 5 or 6, because my older sister was talking to my cousin about it. When I asked what it was, I was told to never search it up. I did, I was a naive child, if you tell me not to do something, I’d do it. I then became hyper-sexual, at age 8, I was afraid of what would happen. I didn’t know if it was a sin, that’s when I started hating sleep even more, because I’d dream about being sent to hell while everyone I love was in heaven. I wish I spoke out, I now hate church, as it’s just a reminder that I might be separated from those I love most. Im sorry this happened, I hope you’re doing okay.

[@milk_gobbler_daniel]

This comment. This hit really close to home. I’m sorry you had to go through that, you’re not alone

[@The_T_Drawing_D_Board_B]

@ I hope you aren’t either.

[@Person444i2m]

How did you get hypersexual at 8 ? Also if you wanna go to heaven, just repent to God and don't be a lukewarm Christian

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

This is exactly why all kinds of churches need to shape up. Now. I have so much rage in my heart for what churches are doing, scaring away the most vulnerable people with fearmongering and victim blame. All I can say at this point in history, is to explore other churches. Explore your feelings too, if not first. It's not God telling you that you'll be separated from everyone you love forever. Someone, or multiple someones, put that thought into your head. It's not true. Forgiveness is permanent and eternally repeatable. I love you. I'm sorry.

[@The_T_Drawing_D_Board_B]

@@DreamtaleEnjoyer Thanks. I hope you’re doing good too :D

[@iamPudding]

These are forms of sexual trauma. Not all sexual trauma is SA.

[@asillygoofygoober]

Thank you very much

[@King_gurgler]

im traumatised by seeing literal teen nudity in my nearby city

[@rigormortisgirly]

I didn't realize until I had my first time that sex wasn't just pleasurable for men. I thought of it as a thing you did for your boyfriend to pleasure him, not yourself. I was shocked- I knew everything about my anatomy and where everything was, but I didn't know sex was for anyone who wants it. It's sad.

[@haruyu123]

That just says you don't read books or research stuff

[@Person444i2m]

​@@haruyu123 your not wrong, though it's concerning since the topic of how babies are made usually taught all over schools, she might not have gone to school at a young age

[@PawsWithClaws_]

@Person444i2m Some schools don't teach it, atleast not well. I didn't have sex Ed until high school.

[@Person444i2m]

@PawsWithClaws_ oh, oh my that's crazy

[@pastelminty1714]

In Louisiana, we didn’t learn Sex Ed till I was in the 12th grade, luckily I knew everything about the anatomy and STDS thanks to mom and dad, but it’s scary how my some of my peers never learned earlier

[@WESAGH]

This made me soo uncomfortable, and then I realized how powerful a statement that makes this a work of art. Absolutely amazing job. The scrutiny women face for their sexuality is such an obstacle within our society. That's what makes this masterpiece so raw and unapologetic. The way you lay out these experiences of what it is to be a woman today, with all of its attributes... ugh. The emotion in your voice hinting its slight tinge of anger, paired with these amazingly harsh drawings.. I literally have no words. I strive to be this deeply connected with my own work. As another fellow neurodivergent afab, this also shined light on my own experiences, thank you so much for creating this.

[@ghost_ivaan]

2:39 "I knew what rape was long before this." 3:38 "My body is not mine" 3:45 "I shouldn’t be allowed to make art of sexual trauma because im not a survivor, but then I remember that I am a woman" damn these hit hard because most of us have had to worry about men looking at us

[@peachy4138]

This short communicates a lot of the feelings I've had my entire life about myself. Like sexuality was assigned to me and I was given no autonomy over it. If you haven't heard of it yet, you should give the song unattractive by sophia isella a listen.

[@ninel1995]

Can we stop fetishizing breasts? They are not reproductive organs and there is no reason to treat them as such. Breast fetish is very popular, but it's still a fetish nothing more, please stop treating them by default as sexual objects. Girls and women should be allowed to go shirtless when it's hot, do breastfeeding in public places or whatever. If you think it's not modest, then it's a problem with you and you only, that's just normal body part. There are hand fetishists, should we all start wearing gloves because someone might have sexual thoughts?

[@pliers_]

That’s what I’m saying! Should I wear socks at the beach because people have foot kinks? Nooo

[@GoroAkechi_Real]

no LITERALLY. even as someone who does like breasts (and has them myself) they should not be inherently sexual. There's a time and place for everything, and in public is not one of them.

[@Moon_Princess2]

You have a point there. It's just a normal body part. What's wrong with people? So many women have it, it's normal.

[@Farasin-Art]

@@ninel1995 you can't compare breast to hands logically but yea breastfeeding is actually mustnbe legal and okay you're feeding a kid

[@humanbean4037]

Exactly. I have a kink for a body part that is commonly shown, but i don’t expect people to cover up because of that. It’s my issue to deal with, and deal with it I do. I only sexualize people who are aware of how I am and want to be sexualized by me. It’s very easy.

[@Vagisha0]

I cried…this is one of the most relatable animations ever and underrated 😢

[@DougFantasy]

As a man I can't help but feel horrible and disgusted with myself after watching this video, Especially since I have an unwanted addiction to pornography and I'm still struggling to fight against it. I don't know what to say other than sorry for everything you and other women have been through..

[@Edahs_exists]

Don’t feel bad abt it, the fact you’re disgusted says a lot abt good character already. Best of luck with recovering from ur addiction❤

[@DougFantasy]

@Edahs_exists Thanks :)

[@AloisW-c7w]

Honestly (i know im really sensitive) but this made me cry a lot. Thank you for showing empathy, man that’s all I ask, I’m a 15 year old girl and I’ve never had a good experience with being friends with men or even knowing men including my father, I mean just yesterday a guy who was my friend tried to groom me, I’m really paranoid of men and seeing men be apathetic on the internet, threatening rape against me etc makes it all worse. I just had to reply to another dude who commented on this video who was saying he was mad at women that he was a virgin on a video like this… as you can tell my experiences with men in real life and online haven’t been great but I ALWAYS cry of happiness when i see a man that’s empathetic to girls and women like me who’ve gone through it, it brings me a lot of *hope* since I’m really scared of men in general (I don’t hate men I just have to assume men are bad for my safety, I know its obviously not all men but sometimes I can’t feel that in my heart and I get real paranoid). I wish you the best of luck with your addiction to porn, i hate the industry i really do but I’m really proud of you to recognise you had an issue and for trying, I’ve had addictions in the past (not with porn but with self harm) and I know how difficult it can be.

[@DougFantasy]

@@AloisW-c7w Don't give up, you will find the right people for you to ease your pain someday, I know what it's like to be paranoid, so I can understand how it is in a way. (In my case it's about what other people think about me, making the comment above required a lot of willpower for fear of being judged) Edit: By the way, I'm not good at expressing myself so I'm sorry if I couldn't convey what I wanted to say

[@AloisW-c7w]

@@DougFantasy no no no it’s okay you conveyed it well. It means so so much to me, thank you. And I wish you the best with everything, you really deserve it

[@pastellatte2006]

We can't do anything nonsexual if we are born female. When I was a child, my family believed that I would be a stripper cause I liked to dance, and they thought I was stupid. It doesn't matter that I'm an asexual adult now, I will always be perceive as a sexual being just because of my sex

[@SingleIsFreedom]

as a fellow ace, i cannot tell you how accurate this feels to an indescribable degree.

[@NoSpectate]

@@SingleIsFreedom an*

[@SingleIsFreedom]

@@NoSpectate which part

[@NoSpectate]

@@SingleIsFreedom The word before indescribable.

[@SingleIsFreedom]

@@NoSpectate oh thanks

[@british.biscuit]

I am so happy my parents always openly talked about it. Teach kids instead of keeping them save and covering their eyes and mouth saying its "inappropriate"

[@koymadis]

this is truly a gorgeous animation, it speaks volumes for people who have been assaulted and not, it’s truly just horrific to even be human, be a woman, and i despise the world for it every day.

[@hiitsme2814]

that last line hit so hard. everything portrayed here has always felt gross and private. watching this makes it feel like im not alone. i know millions of other women around the world have gone through this too. it's just the system built around us. but they don't want to incorporate us.

[@wouldntyouliketoknowwesath7789]

As a trans guy, this reminds me of how my first couple periods were a complete secret, because I didn't know what was going on and was too scared to tell my mom. She only finally told me about it in a very awkward conversation when she saw the bloody toilet paper that the dog pulled out of the trash can. How embarrassed and upset I felt learning about it. How sad I was that I'd have to go through that. Every. Month. How I'd get told "maybe later" when I begged to wear my older brother's old swimsuits. And how unfair i thought it was that I wasn't allowed to run around with my shirt off like him, like how I did as a toddler.

[@isabelwoodward9260]

This was litterally my childhood. It makes me feel less along and less isolated knowing that this wasn't just me, but it makes me feel sick knowing that it's common enough to be something we need to talk about.

[@That_KittyGirL]

Honestly this animation is just so good, everything about it. But the saddest part of it is that this is something that almost every single person borm a female can relate to. I wish that society wasn't like this.

[@aitanacruz9882]

@@That_KittyGirL It's hard to find societies without these elements, but a lot aren't universal. It used to be common for women to be bare chested in a lot of places.

[@sophiaf.9853]

I agree with all of the things that this girl went through though. Why would anybody want their kid, male or female, to be naked in a public place? It’s not their fault if they’re SAed, but to not protect them is to make life easier for offenders. I wouldn’t be surprised if this content was purposefully designed to make nude children more accessible to pedophiles.

[@aitanacruz9882]

@@sophiaf.9853 Are you really saying this vent video is some kind of pedophile conspiracy, that's idiotic. Her complaint was that women's bodies are more sexualized than men's, to the point men can be shirtless but women can't. This is NOT universal, many societies allow women to show their breasts and do not sexualize them to that point. Just like not all societies demand women wear a veil to cover their hair. If body parts were not so sexualized then it would not matter.

[@ticcitoasty]

@@sophiaf.9853 watch it again. and if you still don’t understand watch it again. nothing about this is predatory and that thought process is the exact thing this piece is commenting on. it’s not sexual for a child to want to be shirtless when they’re hot and sweaty and they get to see their father and brother do that to cool off. it’s not sexual for a child to want to go swim in the ocean at a beach. it’s not sexual for a child to have visible body hair. ITS NOT SEXUAL FOR A CHILD TO EXIST. ITS NOT SEXUAL FOR A WOMAN TO EXIST.

[@mariavictoriazelaya]

Since very young, I've had body hair, my mom wondered if it was normal to have the amount I had, she took me to doctors to check, nothing was abnormal with me... but yet I was abnormal. Being called "monkey" since childhood by family members, being told what to do very strictly with my hair/*body*. *I'm f*cking tired of it.* I want to have the confidence and safety of going out with leg and face hair just like my male family members and male friends can. Hell, I draw too, I sent everyone to go f*ck themselves and drew a female character with beard and body hair, it gave me so much relieve and comfort doing that. A friend of mine thought it was so cool that she too drew a woman with beard, I almost cried :") the influence that you have is greater than you think. And yet, people still ask me "why don't you do laser?" "oh I don't understand why you don't do laser", I think it's pride, but.. I've never told to anyone the reason because it's a bit embarassing and unecesarilly deep, (although I know laser its not really permanent but over time it does reduce your amount of hair) but I don't do laser because the day or time that woman body hair is accepted.. I want to be there. untoched. and scream at the top of my lungs "I was always here! Me! A hairy woman!!". And do a little happy dance 💃 If I have a daughter one day, I want to tell her with all my heart "Go, there's nothingh wrong with you, enjoy yourself and look for the friends that won't look at you weird. I love you ♡" Thank you for this video, you got a lot of thoughts out of my head and onto words ♡

[@mariavictoriazelaya]

KZbin made me censor the comment. bruh I swear to god-

[@frogblehfrog143]

Women with body hair (Aka, their natural state) are so beautiful, don't get why people find it disgusting; it's purely a social thing made to shame women and girls for their natural features.

[@mariavictoriazelaya]

@@frogblehfrog143 Yes! I agree. I just went on a walk today and was thinking of the video above, the comments I read, etc. A thought came to me that this type of comments of "you can't have hair you're a woman!", besides being a social construct, is just another type of oppression towards women really. People just loooove telling women (and people who don't quite fit in whatever thing they "should be") what to do and I'm not here for it!

[@DreamtaleEnjoyer]

@@frogblehfrog143"their natural state" say it louder. The only healthy people with little or no visible *(visible)* body hair... are children. Just think about that for a little while.

[@Ironorchids]

Thank you for this. I carry a lot of rage against my mother because although she was given proper sexual education and care, she married a man who did not believe in teaching women about their bodies or even female hygiene, so she tried to make me ignorant of myself to please him. She didn’t understand and still doesn’t understand how badly she failed me, and she really hates me in more ways besides. I understand the loneliness that you felt. You are valid and a great communicator. Thank you for this art ❤

[@noname-ri8fz]

First time I was told to cover up was by my uncle. We were in the check out at the store and he pointed to my chest, told me my v-neck was too low and I would pull the wrong attention like that. I was 7, I remember being so confused, infuriated later on

[@sophiaf.9853]

I feel uncomfortable seeing children in skimpy clothing. You should be infuriated with your parents for giving you access to a shirt like that rather than your uncle for trying to protect you

[@NoSpectate]

@@sophiaf.9853 Yeah

[@poopeater_69420]

​@@sophiaf.9853 I don't think a v-neck is at all skimpy, especially for a 7-year-old. And with the being infuriated with their parents, a lot of girls' clothing is a lot "skimpier" than it should be but I digress.

[@IChangeMyUserNameTooMuch]

If you excuse me, I shall go cry now.

[@BaneofRats]

what hit me hardest was "dont change in front of the window, some creep could be watching." that was the line my dad would tell me all the time. it was my responsibility as a six year old to make sure perverts werent preying on me. my own home was apparently no longer a safe place. it worried me so much as a kid that i still have strange nightmare like dreams about what would happen. im glad you made this. i think you captured the shared trauma that comes with being perceived as a woman, especially as a child.

[@milkcarton9016]

I am shocked how common this is! I’m 18 now and I realised how fortunate I am apparently. I wasn’t taught this "modesty". Hell I have never been afraid to lift of my shirt or even show my body in a natural way. I realise how lucky I am to have learned sufficient sex Ed and know exactly what was happening to my body. Never had any questions.

[@c0metb4tzz]

everyone should see this video

[@rattus7881]

What about hitler should he see it?

[@AloisW-c7w]

@@rattus7881he’s dead mate

[@rattus7881]

@AloisW-c7w who dead?

[@AloisW-c7w]

@@rattus7881 not you deleting your comment 💀

[@rattus7881]

@@AloisW-c7w no i think its the poster or youtube censor a bunch of other comments and replies keep getting deleted :(

[@BeesKneesBenjamin]

Ngl as a male rape victim it happened in my teens, modesty clearly doesn't even matter that much, if they're out for you, they get you. My attacker is still walking freely, now it's also too long ago to really make a case out of it. I wasn't taken seriously, I was (and sometimes still am) too embarrassed it happened. For others in a similar predicament though, I know it's frustrating for people sometimes not taking you seriously. But I can tell you even going through the hardest of times, there is definitely light at the end of the tunnel. With good help you can eventually trust again and live a happy life. I always find it hard, ever since I got a girlfriend, I find myself worrying a lot about her safety going alone down the streets or whatever, travelling at night. I can also say subconsciously I tell her too often to be more modest out of fear for her to experience the same I did. I know this shouldn't be the answer, it's curing symptoms rather than the illness. I struggle for myself to be sometimes called a liability for my gender, but I can't blame women for doing so. My attacker was a male as well, they're statistically overrepresented. I hope one day we can look back at this for being one of the many disparities we solved you often see in history books. As for now, women, stay strong. It may feel hopeless sometimes, but the fight WILL eventually be rewarded. You can do it

[@AloisW-c7w]

I am so so sorry that you went through that. I wanted to say about the whole modest thing, rape as a crime tends to be motivated by power not lust, you’re completely right. People, no matter what clothes they wear can get raped, clothes don’t rape, rapists do, so if you ever feel like it was your fault because of your clothes or anything like that, it wasn’t and it never will. I really hope you’re doing okay and as a young girl who hasn’t really had any good experiences with men in my life, thank you for being empathetic it means so much.

[@RobinThecat-u1x]

My own dad has sexualized me. I’m so uncomfortable with being sexualized (I have been a few times ) that it makes me want to cry. I hate people who sexualize SA or do anything like that to others. No one should be sexualized against their will. And the fact that it’s socially excepted for women to be is literally insane

[@Person444i2m]

Confront him, he will never know your feelings if you don't. Also your dad is quite horrible by tongue why did your mom marry him anyways

[@NoSpectate]

Give a little more context, what did he say?

[@AloisW-c7w]

@@NoSpectate why the hell are you asking a stranger that weirdo

[@LiterallyInklingGirl]

The pleasure thing really resonated with me. I had known about sexual masturbation since I was 4 years old,didn’t know what my crotch looked like until I was 8, and even when I was 12 and we learned about reproduction, we only learn that we have periods. The boys were taught that they experience pleasure meanwhile we were never taught that being sexual and experiencing pleasure was a regular and normal process. And in media it’s only a man that is happy when it’s sexual. Never a woman. A woman was never allowed to be sexual.

[@TrashSpace69]

I was raised in germany. Often visited ukrain because of my family. I remember when we went bathing at the sea when i was 7, i was wearing a 2 piece bikini while my ukrainian friends all just had bathing shorts. And it confused me so much as a 7 year old why they didn't feel the need to wear a top as a girl. It's not a crazy story like this, but it reminded me of that.

[@Hospitalized_NB-spacey]

Words cannot express how badly I needed to hear this. It was my own experiences described in someone else's words, and watching this was both validating and humanizing. I know you may never read my comment, but I want you to know that your message is heard, and your experiences are valid. Thank you.

[@burnedoutgraduatestudent4482]

I relate to this. So, so much. I was taught the importance of modesty and the dangers of sexual assault, from a very young age. And then further complicating things was this invasive medical procedure called a VCUG I would get once every year. So, not only was I constantly having to cover and adjust my body to hide it from hypothetical adult men and a hypothetical threat but once a year I had to go in and have the doctors undress me, spread my legs, and force a catheter into me. From 18 months to 12 years old. Every year. And no one thought that was wrong, even though doctors know the procedure can cause trauma and even used it as a proxy to study victims of CSA. I was made to believe I was just a dramatic child for not wanting them to do this and for screaming when it happened. So basically, what I learned was “having your body violated by adult men is terrible , but if the men wear scrubs then you’re the problem for screaming as they force a tube into you” I’m still trying to learn that I decide who touches me and in what way. No one else does.

[@pterodactyl-rachel]

It’s not the exact same, but I want to share it, it’s similar I guess (sorry if I offend you somehow idk 🥲) When you go through puberty, you get pubic hair, right? Like in your armpits and near your private parts. I started puberty at a young age and grew those pubic hairs, so I couldn’t shave on my own. My mum would do that for me, but every time I would be absolutely terrified. It was scary, well, to me at least. Having scissors near those private areas was horrifying to me. My mum would get angry and tell me that if I didn’t comply I would need to go to hospital. I knew that I needed that shaved but it was still scary, I would even cry, I felt like a crybaby sometimes too. I’m still a little scared of shaving down there (I do it myself of course) but I guess it’s slightly easier and less terrifying now. 😅

[@Gaza_8D]

You made me realise some things so thank you

[@gamemaster4947]

I am neither a survivor nor a woman, but this touched me because it helped me answer something I've been struggling with. I have grown up privileged with a loving family, plenty of food, and as someone who does indeed benefit from male privilege. Sometimes I feel that I have no right to feel so strongly for such issues such as SA, sexism, poverty, or racism (even though I am Black) simply because I've never experienced them firsthand. You are right, though, I may not be a victim, but I am a human. Although my voice may not carry as much weight, it still has a place in the conversation. Thanks for this.

[@inski666]

❤️❤️❤️

[@dentedavocado]

I am in awe. I have no words. You have mangaged to communicate something that resonates so deeply within me that there is almost no words needed. It so perfectly depicts the experience that so many of us have been through. Thank you for this very real and vulnerable piece.

[@olleH-nq3fv]

I feel the exact same way.

[@vwang4947]

I love you, this is so good.. honestly i want to die all lot knowing that this is how society treats women, and then there are people who say, you have rights stop complaining. Knowing that you're automatically not equal to men from birth due to your sexual organs is the most dehumanizing and indignifying shit, its still very depressing, but progress is the only way to ensure others dont have to endure the same shame and embarassment for being born female, i hope this video reaches more people you made it incredibly well

[@BeanManthe1st]

I may not be a woman, but I am a person who’s gone through some sexual trauma, and I feel this, and hope that you can grow past this and become the person who you want and deserve to be.

[@namelessqueen763]

Being a woman should never be seen as “Different” or “Wrong.” I love the fact that I am a woman, and I wish the world shared that sentiment.

[@WorksOfMartina]

Thank you for this beautiful open and vulnerable piece. Sending love

[@syzygythenightwingwatches]

Demi here- thank you for making this video; I know it must have taken a huge amount of courage to put this out for the world to see, so I appreciate this gesture greatly. Stories like these need to be told in order to let others know that they are not alone, and that feeling like this is, unfortunately, fairly pervasive in our current society. As I just mentioned earlier, I am demi- but this took... a bit too long for me to learn. I knew what aces were for years, but I had the entire definition wrong, I entirely discounted the possibility. It took meeting another ace for me to realize what had happened. My journey with all of this is a long one, and I'm really not sure how appropriate it is to write all of it in a mess of a KZbin comment, but here goes nothing, When I was Of Age™, my parents threw me a book on puberty. They did not really directly talk to me about it. So I never got scenarios where I bled out for the first time on a period and called 911 (I know there are stories like that...), since I had the whole classic sex-ed thing in school starting from when i was 8 or 9 or so. Despite the fact I was just thrown the book and expected to read it, and my mom never explicitly told me I couldn't ask about these things, I still felt like it wasn't something to be discussed, because I never saw my parents discussing it. Neither did my peers discuss it with any measure of maturity, if it came up at all. (To clarify, "it" here just means things generally related to sex, sexual health, etc.) I grew up in an area that greatly prioritized education, and so all matters of relationships and sexuality were thrown to the back and never discussed. Or- well, perhaps I wouldn't know, since I was the type of kid in school to be quietly reading Dostoevsky during lunch than surrounding myself in large extended friend groups of girls. For this reason, I never even had a measure for realizing I was demi/ace, and I assumed that anytime someone thirsted over some poster or called people cute/hot, or did those smash or pass activities, they were being immature and exaggerating. I knew what intercourse was (yes, the kind described in the video; the assumed "default" in our society), but I could hardly fathom how it happened. I mean, being ace is. Sure an experience. So at this point, I was in a place in life where I had not even thought about my own sexuality (I just assumed i was straight, the default, and that I was a late bloomer, or something...) and I never had the social feedback to contrast with my own experiences. It took until senior year of high school, when I was 18, and meeting a fellow ace, to realize that oh! I guess it's not normal, after all... This might also explain why I was drawn to animal-pov stories as a kid, like Wings of Fire- because although yes, there is shipping, there is romance, showing this through another species as dragons was more palatable to me- and I didn't have to deal with the constant glorification of romantic relationships in more typical YA novels and such. I was much more comfortable drawing dragons and critters than humans. It was only until recently I dared to expand to humans, but this was only after I started reading Dostoevsky and thought my dragon renditions of human characters were just not cutting it. However, this forced me to confront the fact I could not even draw the chest or crotch area on humans without feeling embarrassed (not just for women though; also men). There's also the fact that for the longest time, I couldn't look at the word "sex" or "sexuality" without getting a _physical pain_ in my head. I attribute this partially to my self-censoring as an ace person not exposed enough to people's experiences, and partially to society's views on these subjects. (I eventually got over this by reading a college textbook on sexuality as exposure therapy... yes, you read that right.) To add on top of the fact that I was demi and grew up in an area where areas related to relationships or sexuality were devalued, or I wasn't involved in the social circles necessary for me to be acquainted with this- I was also sheltered as a child from pop culture. Part of this was parental intervention, where I didn't have access to games, shows, movies, songs- because I was never given any electronic access unless it was strictly for school assignments (all the way until covid hit, when I was maybe 14 or so), but another part was because I never found myself interested _enough_ to pursue studying pop culture on my own, even after gaining access to the internet. Because of this, I wasn't exposed to typical social scripts surrounding sexuality, and yet... somehow... I still developed a kind of aversion. It's something I'm still trying to work out and understand myself. I hope this story helps the right person or at least illuminates the experience of 1 person out of 8 billion people on this blasted planet. XD I have no idea why I shared all of this in a random KZbin comment, and this is one of the few places I have ever been this open about my own journey. I think mine was fairly unconventional given my life circumstances, so- just contributing to the general pool and sample of people's experiences. Thanks for reading, I guess. ----------------- Edit: Well, shoot, I keep thinking of things to add to this comment after I had a look at some other people's experiences. Here goes nothing. I first found out about... pleasure, when I was four. I've been told that this is early as hell, but no, I wasn't ever abused or touched in any way. I found out on my own. It was during naptime, during preschool, and the wild part is that I can still remember exactly how it unfolded. I didn't dare explore that much back then, even though it was naptime (because I sensed that something about it was to be kept _very strictly private_ ), but I still continued to experiment and engage with it on my own once I was home, and had alone time. It was never even an overtly sexual thing until I hit puberty, I suppose. Even then, I'm ace, so the whole thing is complicated and a mess... again, I'm still trying to figure myself out and how I fit into everything. The other thing to address is how I actually wanted a smaller chest as a kid going through puberty because I didn't want people's eyes on me in... that way. And, again, because I didn't know I was demi at the time, I couldn't explain why I felt like this, but now I know part of it was my demi-ness and the other part is honestly just basic self-respect, to not want to be reduced to body parts alone. So even though nobody told me I had to cover myself, I always wore long sleeves, long pants, on everything, all the time. I didn't like dresses or even t-shirts, but I admit that I'm the one who's not the norm here... I've self-censored a lot in my own life. I'm still learning to unlearn this. Frick, this comment is WAY too long now. Cheers anyway.

[@shawnnadarlene2455]

2:46 The crude tracings of family photos are haunting, and sooo emotional. I appreciate you saying all this, this discussion really needs to be had.

[@THErealS0R4akaSora]

0:45 I hate it. Why men can show his chest and not women? I don’t get it. I don’t hate men. I hate the people who make the law. 3:16 I hate it. I hate it when people victim-blaming. The victim isn’t wrong. They are never wrong in the first place.

[@Skyset_angel]

Yeah there are African women bare chested it’s their culture. Why we have to think so perverse?

[@i_h8_losers]

creeps exist and we can do nothing about it, i think covering up is useful to get rid of unwanted attention, i know it's not the victim's fault but what can we do? covering up minimizes the chance

[@somestuff8064]

You did good work on this. It’s deep and offers different perspectives. I’d like to add that I think an aspect of parents doing this is not wanting their child to face the trauma of being violated so they try to teach them to not invite danger in more ways than necessary. You can do everything right and still be hurt. Not that it’s your fault or responsibility, but that people will harm those regardless of all the right things and attempting to protect you in any way and reduce risk is important to them. I’m not saying it’s right, but when you can’t always stop someone from harming your child, you’re try to at least make them less defenseless. (Hopefully that makes sense. I felt the “your responsibility to not be harmed” could use another view point to consider. Not to dismiss what you said, but to add something to think about how parents try to protect their children, not that it’s their desire to teach them it’s the child’s responsibility if something happens.)

[@petofiarkwright3236]

Even if you're not a survivor, you portray how it feels pretty well. Props to that, I love how unique this art looks

[@anti_acido]

that's why i think it's more important to make children understand what rape and assault is, rather than giving vague warnings about things that are "inherently wrong" or "immodest". i know it hurts to know creeps and pedophiles lust after your body when you are just existing, that you will never have any autonomy about your body image, but evil lurks within even the "best" people. if it's for the safety of the child, a little trauma is needed. tell your children what a vagina is, what a penis is, what assault is. no flowery words. no little secrets. no little codes. sure, you're stripping them of their innocence, but it's better to do that rather than having them be stripped of their innocence in the worst way possible. and everyone who is against this is to be suspected immediately. even if there is a perfect world where everyone understand it's not the victim's fault, that doesn't mean perpetrators won't exist, or that they will be punished always.

[@utena2]

Getting scolded by a teacher when i was about 8 for wearing a tank top in the summer because it was "too revealing" and "distracting the boys" was when it really hit me that my body was considered somehow shameful. And this didnt just cause me to internalize the idea that the female body is shameful, it was teaching the boys in the class the same thing. The boys would tease me and other girls and snitch on us if we were wearing clothes that were "too revealing" and the teachers were reinforcing this shaming behavior by actually scolding girls if a boy said anything about what she was wearing. Not even a religious school or anything, it was a public elementary school in the 2000s