My 5 Favorite Strategies to Use with an Upset Child

I'm a preschool teacher and in this video, I offer my 5 favorite strategies to get young children to do what you want them to do.
#5 I Mean Business Voice
#4 Redirection
#3 Active Ignoring
#2 First/Then
#1 Giving Choices
Give them a try and let me know if they work for you!
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[@krislozano0703]

Lol. When you said, “It is time for dinner. Sit at the table.” I got very still and realized it had worked on me!! 😂😂😂

[@Yarn.passion]

Same 😂

[@Jade-2024]

It reminds me of my primary teacher. Lol😂

[@rachellepercival2844]

Same here ! Lol

[@flowersflowers9642]

OH MY GOD !!! I AM SO THANKFUL TO FOUND YOU! i am a teacher in day care only for 8 months and i need to learn a lot ! thank youuuuuuu

[@benzilembethe2150]

Thank you so much. I was so pleased to hear some of the things that I am doing right too. Very insightful and inspiring.

[@nyeinlay9646]

Im a prekg and kg school founder from Burma, Southbeast Asia. Luckily i found your video today. I have 1 adhd kid and i am finding the way how to treat and teach that kid in the school. So im thanksful as i get the idea with 5ways of yours. May be in some oths months i will report the result by using yours. Thanks again.

[@ericarivera8514]

I am a assistant teacher for mostly pre school kids and I just started this week. I am very new and am still trying to learn all the kids names, routine, etc. I lately have been struggling with a handful of kids and I just can’t get to them. Watching your videos are helping me see where I am going wrong. I am hoping as I try these strategies today and next week it will help me a bit.

[@positivepreschooltips]

Good luck! Sometimes teaching is trying a lot of things until you find something that works.

[@hsaweber357]

You made it sound so easy! I worked with 3-5 yrs and this is my first job. I find it so challenging especially with behaviour and get them to listen.

[@jessicavelazquez1858]

I love the active ignoring strategy but unfortunately, it draws other teachers attention and admins making them walk in and think something is happening to the student because of their screams. I always stood by ignoring negative behavior but it is hard for me. Thank you for the rest of the tips. They are great :)

[@positivepreschooltips]

Yes! It is much trickier in a daycare setting. Active ignoring is not a strategy that everyone is comfortable with and you should only do what is comfortable and feels natural to you! Thanks for the comment.

[@wy844]

Same experience! I am a new teacher and I did active ignoring to a kid demanding my attention, but the other teacher told me that I should respond instead. :(

[@alonicapablo6464]

I agree with you. I'm a new daycare teacher and some of my students just have big feelings and sometimes I can't do anything to soothe them. So sometimes just crying it out is what they need. But of course when you're alone or you're busy with diapers, it does attract other teachers to come in and see what's going on.

[@joshgentry571]

I’ve used this so much working in a Twos room. I started in the three in daycare and i played into them calling my name so many times, but after being in the twos and witnessing so many tantrums I can now keep going on with helping other students and keeping them safe without giving in. This helps me with any age and where they are emotionally

[@destinylentini]

Please come to my preschool and spend a day with me and tell me what I could do differently! Ur like the super nanny only for teachers! I've been only working there since March of 2022, from my first day its been COMPLETE chaos because no one was able to properly teach me, I was pretty much thrown in, having no prior experience in preschool and only manly have experience by being a parent of 2 myself. Im now addicted to your videos, your amazing!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Destiny, thank you for the comment! Part of my job has been to model and coach other teachers; I love helping struggling teachers because WE HAVE ALL BEEN THERE! It is not an easy job; however, keep your sense of humor and remember preschool should be fun :)

[@lulus.797]

I'm so glad to have found your channel. I just started teaching preschool students and your tips and strategies are working like a charm. Thank you so much for all that you do and I'm looking forward to more videos from you!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thanks so much for watching!

[@three6416]

i'm so grateful i found your channel. i am 15 years old and i am going to be working at my gymnastics center with 3-4 year olds in 1 week, and it has been so helpful to watch your videos to prepare myself for what is to come!

[@positivepreschooltips]

That’s very exciting! Good luck and let me know how it goes.

[@meaghenstandlee6644]

I was thrown into a class with 2 on the spectrum and NO TRAINING just watching the other teachers was my ONLY thing to go off of and they are all BURNT OUT at this preschool so they arent much help plus im 34 no kids of my own, and barely can be firm with mu chihuahuas so i had NO IDEA what chaos i was getting myself into! now the kids love me BUT dont respect me they see me as the fun sweet playmate its SO HARD!!! The kids on the spectrum seem to need more guidance and attetion but with a class of 11 i cant do that it's heartbreaking to be honest. thank you for your videos even though im doing my cda im just a center aide and feel so ALONE in this whole thing

[@positivepreschooltips]

I know that can be a challenge. I might suggest keeping your schedule very predictable and routined. If there is going to be a change, be sure to give the children plenty of warning that a change is coming. You could also make a picture of a star and hold it up whenever you are informing the children of a change. Children on the spectrum do very well with visual supports. I hope you find this helpful. Please reach out if you have any other questions. Thanks for your comment.

[@meaghenstandlee6644]

Maybe once I get my CDA and am assigned my own classroom it’ll be different but I’m just in multiple classrooms different age groups so it’s hard to set a routine I’m at the mercy of passive aggressive teachers who count down the days for the weekend while I’m researching how to do my job better I’ll try the visual aides thanks for the reply ❤

[@leahsmith9271]

Yes love this!

[@sandrabaca178]

Very helpful tips, thank you so!!!!

[@priscillaramos3033]

Thank you so much for sharing!!

[@jonibells9386]

I am so glad I found you!! You are so helpful!!

[@tieramakaiwi7776]

Thank you for this video! Very simple and effective:)

[@danfry654]

Very practical advise.

[@styledn3]

Thank you so much! You are so wise ❤

[@skeeterburke]

I've always had success with offering a snack and a trip to the bathroom in sunday school. There's always a new kid who's never been there and a little separation anxiety as the parents leave them with you. Snack time is usually a hit. Then they are happy to draw and even follow the lesson. So, regardless of the environment, I try to focus first on the basics. If they have boogers, offer them a Kleenex, et cetera

[@divinedamian-china7837]

Thank you so much for those great tips... so helpful 🙏

[@JulitaPearson-bc5lj]

Thank you! These strategies are great!

[@kathrynevans6293]

Great timing on this video 👍

[@renatanetaf4842]

Thank you for sharing.

[@blessedpearls9373]

Wow these tips are awesome for elementary kids as well 💗

[@cocochannel1948]

I'm an educator, and all your 5 strategies are really working well in our school. 👏 ❤😊

[@juliaa1617]

What a great set of useful advice, nicely explained too! With good respectful attitude in correcting behaviour of the little ones who forget how to make good choices! Thank you so much for sharing

[@positivepreschooltips]

You are very welcome! Thank you for tuning in.

[@vanasrikantha7565]

I love all those 5 ideas!👍

[@michaelawolfman9121]

This is so helpful!! Thank you!!

[@mohdshahnawaz3864]

Absolutely loved this video. Thank you so much for this valuable information. Lots of love from an Australian 🇦🇺❤

[@olahiannyeong6021]

i love your videos! Thank you so much 💗

[@shannonhall8144]

You've got those I mean Business eyes too!

[@isabellac.8155]

You have no idea much you have helped me. Thank you!!!

[@positivepreschooltips]

I'm so glad I could be of help! Please stop by again and don't hesitate to reach out if you have specific questions. Thanks for watching!

[@Sweet_Teaa_]

5. I mean business voice 4. Redirection 3.Active Ignoring 2.First/Then 1. Giving Choices

[@olgas2469]

Thanks for your suggestions and tips.

[@positivepreschooltips]

My pleasure!

[@dextineet2415]

So glad I found your channel! Kmjust became Lead Pre-K teacher at a daycare and I’m trying to find my voice with my kids! This really helps! Thank you 😊

[@positivepreschooltips]

Good luck with the school year.

[@briwilliams7773]

I’m so glad I found this channel I am about to start A position as a lead teacher in a twos classroom and a Headstart and I need these tips

[@j.p.morgan8367]

My daughter and 2 preschool age children will be coming to stay with me for 6 months next year. I am preparing by watching these positivepreschool tips to manage myself constructively for the time they will be with me. Thank you for these valuable and well-structure KZbins.

[@jesejanez]

Thank you!!

[@emnicole_]

Starting my first early childcare job tomorrow! Thank you for these videos!

[@veronixawardwell8802]

So helpful and positive! Thank You, Love your approaches… Wish you were my teacher when I was a little one : )

[@marychrisbailey6722]

great advice

[@steveschreiner3147]

Great video. Very Helpful. Thank you!

[@yanisleidyjones8029]

Great tips! Thank you!

[@positivepreschooltips]

You're welcome! Thank you for commenting.

[@debrishmawi7512]

Even though I’ve already been using most of these, just hearing you, explain them is a great justification in reminder for me I appreciate it!

[@SpiritfyBrand]

Good content. Good energy. I can tell that you run a great classroom. Hoping to start my teaching career very soon! Peace and Blessings!

[@msamyhowe]

I just want to say how pleasant it is to watch your video. It is so positive and practical!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thank you so much! I love working with children and sharing what I have picked up along the way. Thanks for posting your comment.

[@bavithk2800]

Thank you

[@stephcurry4199]

Very helpful. Thank you

[@titimama241]

Awesome! Thank you!!!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thank you! I appreciate your comment :)

[@writtenbyAna]

This is so helpful! Thank youuuu

[@karemanmohamed1539]

Thank you!! ❤❤❤

[@positivepreschooltips]

You're welcome. Thank you for commenting!

[@jennylynsanchez7762]

I am so happy I discovered your channel today.I usually don't leave comments but I just want to let you know what you are sharing are really helpful. Thank you so much.

[@positivepreschooltips]

I so appreciate your comment! Thank you for taking the time to comment and your kind words!

[@rebekabryan7574]

I’m starting work in early education this is amazing information thank you 😀🌷

[@Yalah17]

how is it going? I'm starting private tutoring and I'm super super nervous 😭😭any advice?

[@elizabethsimon3618]

Thank you just came across your video

[@delwynbaker2029]

I will be trying out these strategies thanks. As Im listening children have come to my mind who I will be trying these out on.

[@positivepreschooltips]

Let me know if you have any luck with any of these strategies.

[@reaniebeanie94]

Fabulous, so simple and effective.

[@positivepreschooltips]

YES! My favorite strategies are simple yet effective! Thanks for posting, Catherine.

[@dwalters448]

This is really good information 👍

[@enaworldtv]

Thank 🙇 you

[@user-ev9zs4zo1j]

Wow! So creative

[@Mazalapad]

Really good teacher 👍🏼

[@Lavidadeyari]

Great video Thanks for the help

[@hayanishamoamar-md6so]

very useful thanks for this video❤

[@danfry3501]

Good information to have during a quarantine.

[@positivepreschooltips]

Glad it was helpful!

[@cindyyang1670]

I'm very glad found your channel. It's an amazing strategies. I look forward to watching more your videos. Thanks a lot! God bless

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thank you and thanks for commenting!

[@syarifahsabira3522]

Thanks for sharing teacher...as a teacher i learnt a lot

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thank you posting a comment! We teachers need to look out for each other 😀

[@angelaliu7883]

Now I'm thinking of one of my students who cries and screams just to get attention. 😊 Thanks I now know what to do with her. Learned much from this vid. Thanks a lot. ❤

[@positivepreschooltips]

You are welcome! Thank you for commenting.

[@elanagoldstein3366]

Thanks for sharing these important tips. I love sharing my knowledge about early childhood education (20 years in the field plus a MA in education) , and also am hoping to communicate as clearly as you on my KZbin channel.

[@josephgold88]

I just watched your video on helping your kids learn better, and I found it very useful. Keep up the good work!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Good luck with your channel! I will definitely subscribe! All us Early Educators have to stick together and support each other. 😀👍

[@elanagoldstein3366]

Thanks for the support. It means a lot

[@05carsm]

I'm subscribing, I have an almost 5 years old nephew, you got me at the business voice

[@laurice8056]

I’ve often successfully used these suggestions at home over the years with my own children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews. I’m a retired healthcare professional and I’ve had to turn to some of these techniques in the hospital at times. How can these ideas for handling children be used in a virtual classroom online? If you have any suggestions, could you please make a video about this? Thanks for sharing. I’m a new subscriber.🤗💕

[@tashadawn2010]

Thank you for your videos! Your video with tips on teaching preschoolers to color was especially helpful to me. I’m not a teacher I just work with my 3 year old son. Please make a video on tips for teaching preschoolers to color! We need help! Thank you!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thank you for your suggestion on a video about coloring. I do have several ideas. I’ll work on putting that video out!

[@ShannonMichelle7937]

This channel is amazing thanks for your advice. I don’t even know how I got here, but o have 5 children lmao god was looking out today.

[@positivepreschooltips]

I'm glad you tuned in! Thank you for your comment.

[@Budams94]

Thank you for the video. How do you deal with a child who tells me what I should do? I work as an education assistant and some kids tell me how I should do my job. Thank you for your advice.

[@dancygil8498]

Great video 😊

[@dublewr2194]

Thank youu

[@enjoylittlethings7921]

It’s really helpful as I have just started working as ta in foundation stage but I work through agency so it’s kind of different as I’m going different schools and working with different teachers and children. Can you do some more videos which might help new ta too

[@sefjung99]

I have to babysit my 6 nieces and nephews for few years. I talk very soft to them and rarely scolds them unlike my sister. They like my sister better. They sometimes purposely hurting my feelings. I cry so many times. I just pray and pray. Don't know what to do to make them like me.

[@positivepreschooltips]

Oh, I get it! Please know that you just have to take control and be the leader. My suggestion to you would be to keep them busy with fun activities. You could build a "tent" out of blankets and furniture and then climb in with a flashlight and read stories. Don't be afraid to have them be your "little helpers" and give them easy jobs (folding laundry, clearing the table after a meal, etc) then PRAISE them and tell them what a big help they are to you. You need to develop your own relationship with them (different than their mom) and try not to be so hard on yourself. Hang in there!

[@sefjung99]

@@positivepreschooltips maybe I should step up and be a leader.. They don't respect me at all. Thank you for your encouragement. Means a lot to me..

[@juleingordon5268]

Just bounced on you,thoroughly presented and thoroughly enjoyed...so eye opening....thankyou!

[@positivepreschooltips]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@emily-crawford-soprano9181]

@10:42 it sounds like Active Ignoring is a form of Redirection, just a longer-term version of it. Very cool, thanks so much for this!

[@Cezzagirl4]

So interesting! But What would you do about the whole active ignoring thing if when they cry too much they end up getting sick?

[@achernev]

Giving choices is very Montessori style 😘

[@stellayu507]

Thank you for sharing! Would like to try all of them !

[@sabrinagoodman582]

Very helpful

[@positivepreschooltips]

Hi Sabrina, thanks for commenting!

[@jeraldinemclintock2836]

Hi can you please make a video how to stop separation anxiety in a loving way? 😁

[@positivepreschooltips]

Thank you for your suggestion! That’s a great topic; I’ll work on that and hope to post soon.

[@DoctorCarrieHall]

Up early studying learning new strategies on how to help a child work through their anger.

[@Elsa-fugy]

Your face makes me want to listen to you all the time you’re very beautiful and nice I can feel how warm you’re and thank you for the advices 🤭

[@djthereplay]

+positivepreschooltips Good calls , Cyndi . Even today as an autistic grown up when I am into something or when there is something going on that I enjoy that I get into I go on leave me alone mode until it's done or I am able to get out of it but this was even worse back when I was an autistic child because My Adjustment Problems start to show up and depending on how far I am into other things when I am rushed I could wind up taking the interjection and redirection as an attack on me because in my house and even when I was a SPED student in school it was do what the adult wanted or else . People just need to learn to pack their patience when they do their redirecting and interjecting . With that said , keep doing what you are doing . - Dwight

[@positivepreschooltips]

djthereplay Your words are so sweet, Dwight! I love hearing from you and your experience 😊. Thanks for commenting.

[@donnamontanarella2403]

I thought you gave very useful and effective tips. I did struggle to hear you on my device.

[@alydea9201]

I enjoyed and watched some of your videos. I work in a daycare center. We have a few challenging children. I will definitely use these strategies in our classroom. Thank you!

[@DoctorCarrieHall]

Excellent strategies to learn. I'm a director.

[@ccc919]

Thank you this video is very helpful. What do you suggest for children that through tantrums and throw things, defiant. How would you address the situation?

[@positivepreschooltips]

Tantrums and defiance can be very hard to deal with in the classroom. First and foremost, keep that child and the other children safe. There have been times when I had another teacher take all the other children to the playground when a child was throwing things (to be sure the other children did not get hurt). I then told the child that if he/she wanted to go to the playground too, first they had to pick up what they threw then he/she could join the class. If that doesn’t initially work and the child refuses to pick up the items, I ignore them and act very interested in a book or something on a tablet. I say things like, “oh my gosh, you will not believe what I see. This is so amazing, etc.” Usually the child gets interested and may come over to see. I then cover it and tell them once they pick up the items I will show him/her. I may even volunteer to help him/her with the clean up at that point. Once they comply and pick up what was thrown, I happily show then the book or tablet then walk them outside to join the class. I wouldn’t harp on the issue after that however, I would give them a reminder next time it appears he/she is being defiant or throwing things that if they want to go to the playground, stay with friends, etc. they need to follow directions. If they show the slightest bit of compliance, I would praise them for making a good choice. Remember we have to teach good behavior (to some students) like we would teach colors, numbers and the alphabet. They may not learn it the first or even second time so keep in mind it’s a marathon not a sprint 😀👍. Good luck and let me know how it goes.

[@ccc919]

@@positivepreschooltips thank you so much for the response! Very helpful!

[@abbyxu5272]

Hi, I love your strategy, but how do we deal with a “bad combination?”

[@autumnjohnson9]

I’m a new teacher for 5 year olds, and I have a question for you! If you have a student running around the classroom and when you try to get their attention and they run away from you like it’s a game, what should I do?

[@KARLACHAD]

I have the same problem and is 2 kids they run and run and won’t listen

[@positivepreschooltips]

Autumn, sorry this has taken me so long to reply. I'm not sure how I missed your comment previously. This is what I would suggest: yes, the running is a game so try approaching them by making sitting the game. If possible, do not chase them, start rewarding the children following the directions with stickers, stamps, etc. The object is to have the child understand they get your attention and get to participate in the fun things offered only if they are sitting and not running. Here's a link to a song that has been very helpful to me: kzbin.info/www/bejne/b6raq5yDfb6KiLM Good luck

[@danfry654]

👏👍😊

[@bayamonrican]

What do u do when u work in a daycare and the child's response is to run and scream while flipping toys across the room?

[@novocaine09]

Do you have any advice for a student who does not get the right kind of attention at home? I am a substitute in my son's Pre-K, and we are having a lot of trouble with a student. He is bright, but he is disruptive to the point it makes it hard for the other children to learn. He is not in any abusive situation that we can tell, just overly unstructured. We even send letters home to all parents about proven parenting strategies (get down and talk eye to eye, lots of physical touch and connection, etc). We also have a monthly parent meeting on zoom about conscious discipline to help parents succeed. We only have 2 or 3 attend, though. We try to do everything we can, but sometimes I feel like it is all most impossible without some reinforcement at home.

[@positivepreschooltips]

It sounds like you have excellent ideas and have done several things that i would recommend (sending positive parenting tips home, etc.). If you can provide some more specific information about the behaviors, I would be happy to offer some additional strategies.

[@tatacol83]

Great! I wanted to ask you if you have any advice for those teachers who do not speak the local language of the students and English is the language acquisition? How should teachers of preschool do in that case?

[@juliaherrera1489]

Great! quit question. What have you done in the past, when children go underneath the tables and don't want to get out, and then more kids follow them?

[@Sharonne87]

Hello, very helpful tips. What to do in case my child is throwing a temper tantrum in the restaurant?

[@positivepreschooltips]

Temper tantrums can be a challenge in public places. As a parent, I would scoop them up and take them out. If possible, I would let them calm down then bring them back once they have settled. I would suggest, staying calm and not overly engage with the child but just matter-of-factly tell them, “once you are calm, we can go back and finish our meal”. You may need to let your waitstaff know that you will be stepping out.

[@jessicakorwin4704]

Hi, I had a question about your Active Ignoring Strategy that maybe you can help with. What would you do when you are using the strategy and they amp it up to the point where they are standing on a table or something where obviously at that point they are not safe and you need to intervene? How can you use this strategy in the future? Is this just a strategy that won't work for this particular child? Cause kids are smart and if they know that by standing on a table or something they will obviously get your attention and that becomes a go to action on their part.

[@positivepreschooltips]

Once the child is in an unsafe situation for themselves or others, active ignoring no longer is a 'go-to' strategy. I would tell the child firmly, "Put your feet on the floor (instead of get down)". That is a very direct command telling the child exactly what you want them to do. If the child does not get off the table, I would then give them two choices by saying, "it is unsafe for you to be on table and I don't want you to get hurt. You can put your feet on the floor by yourself or I will help you. Which do you choose?" If the child doesn't choose or refuses to choose, I would quickly remove them and put them on the floor. Active ignoring is tricky and only is validate if the child is not in danger. Safety always comes first. I hope this helps, let me know if there is any thing else I can do to assist you. Good luck!

[@floridehounkpatin2110]

I have a special son who never accept the redirection. I never saw a kid who's mind is so active. Even after redirections he always come back on what he asked for . Even sometimes after 1 month he asked again the same thing. Like he saw a toy then asked. I couldn't afford then I tried to redirect his attention. Each week he comes back to ask for the toy. Even he emphasized that he asked me that before. He is only 2 years old. İt is hard for us to educate him

[@sanyarohiraoshiwara8997]

What can be a strategy for a child who always hides under the table when grumpy during a virtual class?

[@positivepreschooltips]

I have had a similar situation while virtual teaching. What worked for me was to try entice the student with a ‘special surprise’ that they would miss if they were not watching the screen (I have a small dog that once the child was looking, I picked up the dog so they could see). It doesn’t have to be anything fancy, it’s just the anticipation and not wanting to miss something. I also asked the parent what the student liked to engage them as well. I had a little girl that would turn her back to the screen and not engage. I then planned a ‘tea party’ for the next lesson. We were hats, gloves and gaudy jewelry. Because she got to dress-up, she was more willing to engage (of course I was all dressed up too which made me more interesting to look at 😜). Another idea is to have virtual Show-n-Tell. The child gets to ‘share’ one item (you can share too) at the end of the session. Then you can use a ‘first/then’ strategy by saying, “First we have to do the lesson (look at the screen, sit in front of the computer, etc.), then you can share your toy. Teaching virtually has been a challenge for everyone, hang in there and let me know how it goes. Good luck.

[@daralexandra]

Hello. I am an English teacher as second language and was assigned a class of 3 - 4 years old that has never been to school before. Do your strategies apply to kids their age as well? I usually teach 5 - 13 years old so I am having difficulty with this one boy of 4 years old, who refused to listen to me nor follow any activities, grabbed everything that was not for him and kept causing distractions to my class.

[@positivepreschooltips]

Hi FoxyLexy, I am a preschool teacher. Although my strategies can work on a variety of age groups, my main focus is the preschool child. It sounds like you have a challenging student in your class. Once you try some of the strategies, let me know how they worked and if you are having continued problems. The more specific information you can give me (about the behaviors) the more apt I will be to offer specific strategies. Good luck and hang in there!