My Family Is Pressuring Me To Buy A House!

[@patty109109]

Dave’s best advice actually comes when discussing finances and boundaries with family/friends.

[@RealGalaxyGamers]

@john Smith It’s a yes if answer. It’s not a conflicting thing.

[@jamisojo]

@johnSmith-uz8nl Care to explain why? You have plenty of critisicm. What are the reasons for your opinion?

[@jackofhearts1056]

He sounds like a good kid, very respectful and is way ahead financially than most. I hope he succeeds.

[@Guitarlvr01]

Family members are clearly going to feel entitled to stay in this house. His mom, his extended family, all want to do this for a reason. The ulterior motive is obviously lurking.

[@sophia4christ]

Exactly!

[@breannaneville4332]

Poor kid can't see it 🙁

[@robertthompson5908]

There’s no such thing as a free lunch. If the house is worth $400000 and his family wants him to buy it for $294000 to satisfy some psychological need of theirs, then they’re going to hold that over him. Run don’t walk away from this deal.

[@SVSky]

They're using his dilligence and his success.

[@gigiwoodlawn2142]

I also don't know if it's "legal". Otherwise, parents would sell their home to their heirs/kids for $1.00

[@jamisojo]

@@gigiwoodlawn2142 You can give your kids a house. It would be the same difference.

[@tedmartin4882]

If he sells it later and makes alot of money the relatives will expect some of the profit

[@ceciliapreziose3783]

yep, said the same thing, he keeps profit, then they will "need" financial help for something

[@JavierSanchez-lu3jx]

I can hear it in his voice, he's going to need to build a stronger backbone because his whole family might get greedy. He's doing good but he can't be afraid or they might end up trying to control his finances eventually one way or another with this house situation.

[@georgewagner7787]

Going to get the house and lose his family

[@adamseidel9780]

Take the $150k and let the relationship chips fall where they may. Anybody that petty being out of his life is a win,

[@jimroscovius]

And don't give them any.

[@davidcampbell1306]

Dave Ramsey is telling the truth. My sisters said they weren't one bit interested in my mom's property. That lasted until realized there was some money to be made. Family can be cruel. Very cruel.

[@johnadams3418]

This poor kid is being used by his family. They want him to clear the liability of debt on this house himself so the asset can be communal within the family. And the fact that this 21 year old is the "only one in a position" to handle this 294K debt tells you the kind of financially irresponsible folks we are dealing with here.

[@RaymondDawson-v2w]

This boy needs to stop being such a doormat and live HIS life and not CARE ABOUT WHAT HIS MOOCHING FAMILY WANTS OR HOW THEY FEEL. He needs to cut the crap and and WALK AWAY FROM SUCH A FINANCIAL TRAP LIKE AN ADULT.VThis boy seems to be doubling down on doing such rotten deal dispute what Dave says. NEVER MIX BUSINESS WITH FAMILY.

[@AssumeGenders]

⁠@@RaymondDawson-v2wThe “doormat” here… 2 years after buying the house I have zero regrets, have paid off 1/5 of the loan. No one has asked me for a single thing. My mother actually got money from my uncles will and split it between all of her children and gave me “my” portion for the down payment. I went from renting a beat up house with my college buddies to living in a house now worth over $500k with a 15 year loan and am well on track to pay it off early. I have talked about selling the home and moving away and not one family member has had a problem with it. In fact, all of them fully support it.

[@jaysmith6013]

Dave is right this is a trap. A house is probably the biggest purchase a normal person will ever make and it should not be purchased under any sort of pressure or drama or circumstances. A lot of thought should be put into a home purchase as well under some degree of financial security and enough savings to handle unforeseen emergencies

[@Weakeyedominant]

@john Smith the mum and aunt don't need the money immediately and also don't want to pay inheritance taxes etc. There is bound to be multiple cousins who have an opinion that would not be happy if he flipped the house for a 200k profit which is why Dave is saying to get it in writing that no one has any issues him buying the house on the cheap. I've seen happen in other families and always ends in fall outs.

[@jamisojo]

@@Weakeyedominant I'm not sure that this has anything to do with inheritance taxes. There aren't any federal ones right now unless the guy was worth 5+ million or over 10 million if he was married.

[@jacqueline8566]

People need to be taught how to discern traps. Especially family traps

[@jamisojo]

It isn't hard. Somebody asks you to do something remotely strange? Probably a trap. 😄😉

[@hebrews11vs5]

When I was 21 I was unable to think through stuff like this. This situation is a bit weird.

[@jamisojo]

Yeah. It is very weird and that kid definitely cannot think through this well. What kind of idiots would ask a 21 year old to do this?

[@BrandonMinguez]

Even if he gets the letter signed by the whole family, their emotions will still get hurt when (not if) he sells the house.

[@geoffreymoseley6801]

Yup

[@JoyofRVing]

They want him to fix it up to increase the value. Then when he sells it they want the profit split with them.

[@Weakeyedominant]

@john Smith the law is the law but why fall out with half your family for the rest of your life with cousins or other family members making out like you cheated them even if you didn't.

[@aolvaar8792]

When???, My Mother's Family home is over 700 years old.

[@jamisojo]

@@Weakeyedominant fall out with idiots? That sounds like a very good plan actually. Make money WHILE getting terrible people out of your life. Nice!

[@AndrewQuiroz24]

His mom should buy it then.

[@amaliadihel]

Right

[@gigiwoodlawn2142]

This!!!

[@holly5791]

Wow, I just feel bad for this young man. This is nothing short of emotional blackmail. He obviously has made good decisions and is in a good position financially now, but is about to blow it. Bless him.

[@jamisojo]

he's made some good decisions for like 5 months. That isn't much of a track record.

[@SpidermanandJeny]

I've been kind of a part of family and house deals and unless that letter could be written happily and eagerly, I wouldn't touch that deal with a fifty foot pole.

[@privateprivate4384]

Thank God that young man asked for your advice, Mr Ramsey, I hope he takes your good advice.

[@anthonygreenfield123]

Dave's suggestion about that his fam should write him a letter on PAPER. Saying that he can do whatever he wants with the house and not forced to sell it later to his fam for a cheap price or for free is a good idea. Get it on paper. I had the same problem with my fam. "I cannot remember you said that " and just outright denying afterwards. "Forgetting" agreements.

[@kimolu9699]

If he does it. Every financial family burden will be put on his shoulders for years to come

[@maryjojouwstra3860]

Dave is right! A year ago, my daughters father in law died, leaving a condo paid for, and family to sell it. His wife died 10 years before. So they’re trying to find someone who would like to buy it. Only problem is there was a lot of things to fix. So my daughter thinks I should be interested in it, because after I sell my place and buy this condo, I would be better off financially. And she said NO PRESSURE MOM, you think about it. So I did. And with all that would have to be fixed, and I have my actual home, I decided it would not work for me. GUESS WHAT? She was so upset that I had said no. She wouldn’t talk to me for a month.

[@patriciaalbertson5183]

In all likely hood, your property taxes will go up and you could end up spending more per month than if you stay put.

[@kaelaleedaley]

Oh Mary, i'm so sorry

[@n.w.414]

Super proud of you mom for thinking it thru and saying no, sticking to your guns. ❤

[@michelejohnson6459]

Hope you enjoyed your month of quiet!😅

[@TheIdontcarewhat]

I think this young man is doing amazingly well and should be commended for paying off all that debt in such a short period of time. I hope he will continue to build and grow his good financial habits. Yet I will say if I were him I would push my family to sell the house and split the proceeds and he should continue to rent and save up money. Finances and extended family are a bad idea in the best of times, it is an absolutely HORRIBLE combination when emotions are in play.

[@charlesg7926]

And if he doesn’t want to sell the house, he still should buy it. He can RENT IT OUT for a lot more than what the mortgage is… so he’d make a ton of CASHFLOW each month. Plus, the mortgage will be getting paid down so building equity too! Duh

[@charlesg7926]

And for anyone wondering, I make over 200 K a year and have three rental townhomes. They’re awesome investments

[@sblijheid]

@Charles G This kid does not sound like he would be able to withstand mommy pressure. His best deal is to decline.

[@autistic-lutheran-carnivore]

Dave Ramsey almost put a lobster suit on and yelled "IT'S A TRAP!!!"

[@mandysimmons2769]

LOL I always think of that bug eyed guy Admiral Ackbar from Star Wars when I hear that. I remember laughing so hard in the theater. I am old enough to have seen that when it first came out. First movie date with my future husband too.

[@melowely]

I wish there were a “where are they now” segment. I’m curious to know what he decides. I agree this sounds like a sketchy situation & I am hoping he guards himself here.

[@ghjong001]

Mom and Aunt have too much hold over him. He's going to buy it, and he's going to regret it.

[@jimroscovius]

Saul the Troll likes to trash Dave. He doesn't even watch the video before mouthing off.

[@jamisojo]

@@jimroscovius Saul sounds l like an imbacile.

[@janicecrosby6649]

The house would be a family crash pad. Is this young man prepared to take in family members?

[@remustata]

His family should not have even known how much money he has. It's good to tell your family how much money you make in the first job, but after some time, personal finances should be personal. Nobody outside of the family (husband and wife, not extended family) should know your complete financial situation. My stomach is acting up just by listening to this call, I was in a similar position. My best suggestion is to run, move out of town, away from family at least until you develop more emotional maturity to handle such things. You can visit them on special occasions and such but should have separate lives.

[@artemgordon75]

Yes, that's exactly what I started doing. Ever since I started making 60k my mom began asking for mortgage help and weekly income even after I moved out. Can't imagine what she would ask for now.. never told her about my promotions lol..

[@radfoo72]

Dave: Your family is whacked. Caller: No actually just my Uncle.

[@RichardJanvrinYT]

I love how Dave sits there, asks questions, pokes around a bit and then hits them with the PASS - THE FAMILY IS WHACKED LMAO

[@BunkMasterFlex77]

You know Jim Bob is going to come out of the woodworks

[@ThatCho]

This boy is going to be bullied by his family. Sucks to see the point where it could have been prevented.

[@n.w.414]

His old aunt and mom should just take the house and move into it together. Give the boy his freedom. Maybe he will eventually live in another state.

[@radfoo72]

Some how Dad gum always enters into these conversations😆

[@sami-9233]

Hil-ar-io-us

[@gabbsdy8741]

I would buy, only becouse I am cold hearted and I would not think twice before cutting all familiy relations if needed.

[@damonleeb]

He knows it might be a bad deal. He’s scared to tell his family no

[@kerrymarshall2802]

By the house once you sign the papers it is yours to do with as you please

[@nkyryry]

I might buy the house. But yes I would make it perfectly clear beforehand that if I buy the house, it’s mine. It’s not the families. If I want to renovate it, I will. If I want to cut down trees I will. If I want to dig a hole in the backyard and put in a pool, I will. If they want to come over I can say no. If I want to sell it for as much money as I possibly can, I will. Make that clear or don’t touch the house.

[@thelimey351]

Great advice from Dave Ramsey. ✅

[@emmyty]

And the aunt and the mom better keep on working and saving for their own retirement and a possible down payment on their own place if he decides to sell.

[@michealmitchell582]

Ken saying, "weeellllllll.....," might be the funniest thing I've ever heard him say. Haha.

[@3rddegreeburns494]

Dave hit this on the head! Great advice!

[@dougpaquette9518]

All I keep hearing is use velocity banking to pay your house faster isn't that just borrowing money to pay off borrowed money?

[@TestTest-ei4gi]

Once you’re 18, you’re not legally connected to your parents. Your parents can possibly make bad financial decisions but you’re a legal adult and are no longer obligated to put yourself in a bad position financially. Parents, your kids are not your retirement plan. Plan ahead. Let your kids (adults) to be able to live free and take care of their kids and develop this type of thinking

[@henrylondon6308]

"Your family's wacked" 😂😂

[@justinbowman2126]

Anytime someone tells me how to spend my money, when I don’t agree, I ask if they are going to contribute to the cost of it. Shuts them up.

[@sblijheid]

Just ask them when they earned your money. It's your money and you should decide how you spend it.

[@fauxbro1983]

You're 21, you don't need a house.

[@rhizomove6631]

Listen to Dave. Don't buy the house. No one else has the resources except you. They are going to lord it over you. Don't do it.

[@gmarie3053]

He’s going to buy it, he’s already in love. And in a few years he’s going to want to sell and mom and aunt and cousin’s dog want a cut of the profit

[@ceciliapreziose3783]

in the letter also, that profit from the selling of the house he keeps!!! Didn't the uncle have a will???

[@yvonnemclaughlin4324]

He wants the House!!!!!!

[@famlauriek7353]

Definitely a trap, does everyone have free access into this house? Doesn’t sound good to me. Quite the emotional dilemma for this young man unless Auntie and mom just want to give him a great opportunity! Best wishes ❤️🔥

[@ohio1986]

He said his family is emotional, he is also I believe. He's buying this house because of pressure from family which gets his emotions going. Deep down I don't think he wants to purchase the house.

[@AssumeGenders]

@@ohio1986 No, I’ve lived in the house for months now taking care of it. With that being said, I’m not being pressured, and I do in fact want to buy it.

[@jacqueline8566]

@@AssumeGenders Chris, did you ask God if you should buy it? Are you equipped enough to not let family control you if and once you buy the house?

[@jacqueline8566]

@@saulgoodman2018 it’s something you can only know from experience dealing with family members who “dont have” and youre one of the few family members who “does have” It literally cant even be explained in a text reply But if you just search in youtube some key phrases, there’s alot of people giving their experiences how their family became a money trap to them

[@aromero385]

Yeah. It could be also what mom and aunt do so with good intentions, why not?.

[@JuanVargas-ek3yg]

Great answer 👏 👍 👌

[@sophia4christ]

These family real estate deals never work out well in the end. Never do business with irrational family members.

[@debbieframpton3857]

Only buy the house if you truly feel comfortable doing so when I moved back to Illinois 18 years ago my mother wanted me to buy my parents home that I was raised in I said no I never said anything to her but I never had good memories in that house plus it was on a slab and I have always had homes that had a basement and that is what I wanted so you do what feels comfortable to you not what others want If you choose to buy have it independently appraised not go by what they say is the value

[@bettysmith4527]

Nope, don't buy it unless YOU want to!! what happens when you decide you want to move? what happens then, does your family think you will live there forever or that they will get to steal your equity?!

[@chuckiedavidson719]

Dave is speaking the truth but i think this situation is them wanting to close the estate and would rather see a family member get a deal on it and sell it fast rather than go through the stress of selling a home with the owner being dead

[@TheDjcarter1966]

This is shady...they are selling the house at $100k discount. If nobody think there are strings attached they are crazy. If they just sold it after fee and commissions they would each (mom and aunt) pocket $40k. He said neither one of them are in a position to buy the house, so it sound like they could use the $40k. I would pass, now if they would refi the $290k so the mortgage payment was reasonable I would rent from them, but it would have to be a formal agreement and when the roof needs fixed it's on them. Then after five years hopefully you've saved up over $100k and go buy your own house.

[@jamisojo]

I wouldn't wait on these fools to fix my roof. ; ) And yes, this does sound shady. They don't have to buy the house. They just sell it and collect the money. It is a no brain, as you say. Free money.

[@karenr5870]

Best advice I’ve on this show!

[@atombomb31458]

.....Pretty obvious that this would be a big mistake. And no matter how smart this kid is..He is only 21 and doesnt understand people yet. Good advice Dave.

[@sami-9233]

I really really like DR advice here

[@60Airflyte]

If he profits off the sale they will lose their minds. Family will want to buy it someday …. for what he paid for it… ten years from now.

[@darex0827]

Need to correct the title......

[@Jordan-vo3gv]

Need to correct the spelling

[@stephensullivan1011]

Can't once they publish it right? Sad..

[@gauseb]

@@stephensullivan1011 Yes they can and they likely will very soon

[@scarpfish]

I prefer my tittles corrected.

[@gauseb]

@@stephensullivan1011 and fixed

[@umgazel4785]

Only Dave gives this kind of great advice ❤

[@Mary.Shannon]

Also, let NO ONE into the house to stay for a bit. It is not a stop and stay for the family. He needs to toughen up to his family. Set boundries now.

[@slownoma1076]

I’m 21 getting ready to buy my grandmas house. Sounds like this was made for me

[@ridiqulos]

Amazing advice!

[@hollyb6885]

Since you live it, buy it. If you need a 30 year mortgage, get that and make as much in extra payments as you can.

[@cathyl7944]

He buys that house and the next day his mom and aunt are on the doorstep with their belongings. Guarantee it.

[@kohort1]

I dunno, if he has to sell for a good reason in the next day or even the next year it wouldn't be fair for him to get the whole windfall profit. Maybe after a few years. I'm sure that would make a big familial mess too. In reality if he's only getting the discount to keep it for a significant time. If some first right of refusal or time limitation isn't clearly agreed then just don't do it.

[@jimroscovius]

Yes, it would be fair. They sold it to him so he can do what he wants. If they don't like it, don't sell it to him.

[@kohort1]

@@jimroscovius certainly don't overextend himself in doing it either.

[@jimroscovius]

@@kohort1 That's right. He's only 21 - he doesn't need to rush.

[@thewildcardperson]

@@kohort1 that's the point they have nothing over him

[@woodside4life]

@@jimroscovius a few years late to the party, but I agree with you. I really don’t like the idea of somebody watching my pockets and trying to dictate what I do with my money. If he buys the house, it’s completely his to do as he sees fit.

[@jordanhoman0212]

10:33am? Early access, nice! Unless you changed the 8am, 12pm, 4pm schedule...

[@davidnatiel6886]

It's a trap I took over a 390k house no body wanted to take over payments and 6yrs later i sold for 609 and every one thought it was payday. Family problems will come if you don't share

[@JDawgstwothousand]

I think Princess Leia would say "it's a trap"

[@zo_471]

I really hate it when people wont answer a question but tell a long winded story only tentatively related to the question.

[@vjs4539]

It's going to cost him more to find a place to rent.

[@sherriew36]

They want him to buy the house so they can get money out of it.

[@AssumeGenders]

If I bought it, they would literally get no money out of it?????

[@pyewacketpeggy8329]

His sister is going to wind up living there rent free. God help it if he gets married. I wouldn’t put up with it . Leave. It’s on them. He earns a great income at 21 and they think it’s theirs . If he tries to sell it they will expect a cut

[@TheSejonger]

Or pay it off and rent it.Technically keeping in the family woot.

[@jimroscovius]

Nah, too risky. I'd buy it and sell it. The profit is mine because they sold it to me. Too bad, so sad.

[@pawelwisniewski6849]

Mom wants to move in

[@raz0051]

Too much strings, too much emotions. Its a trap, run lool

[@richardw3470]

Is the house on a lake or at a very desirable 'family gathering location' (like down the street from Disney Park)?

[@closingdealz]

he should just flip it for a profit

[@lyndaprice2003]

Run far. Run fast!

[@SVSky]

Don't do it kid, family are the worst possible business partners most of the time.

[@mscott1997]

Subject-to, if possible, sounds like the move

[@CRAIGNV]

You will owe your family a big favor, that they will hold over you forever. Hope you like family as roommates.

[@sblijheid]

That's a bad idea. He should let it pass.

[@michaelwoods4495]

"All but quirky, New Mexico"!

[@bessiedalton891]

Yep it’s a trap

[@ladyliberty8644]

New Mexico Problems for sure 🎈🍿🎉

[@CG-MP]

yeah weird expectations come into play. My dad's family had a 40 acre farm. 4 kids, grandma parceled out 10 acres to each. She willed my aunt, the only daughter, the parcel with her house on it, because she was married to a poor pastor and it was sort of a "if they ever need a place to live" kind of thing. The whole family was in agreement. One uncle built a house on his parcel and raised his kids there. Now, 20 years later, grandma moved out of her house into a retirement community. My uncle's son got married and wanted to move into grandma's house, with the intention of buying it when they have the finances. Here's the catch: in the will the parcels could only be sold between family members, and for no more than $1000 per acre. So now my uncle expects my aunt to sell her parcel to his son for $10k, the house included. Yes, the inheritance was uneven and unfair, but that was intentional and everyone agreed at the time. It's devolved into all sorts of family drama that seemingly doesn't have a solution.

[@amendezmuniz]

I’ll take the deal. Il leave a agreement very clear.

[@michaelwoods4495]

I'd do it. But then, I can afford to lose the $300K and let it go. As for Mom moving in, as long as I have the deed, Mom can live there until she dies. That's what brothers and I did for our mom and it was fine.

[@gandsmeyer2957]

Don't do it. Buy a different house.

[@CoffeenSpice]

I still don't understand why does he need to buy this house from his mother and aunt? Why is he pressured to buy it? He's 21

[@ChosenDeeDee]

Wow! This is totally a trap ☹️

[@ElectricBlueIX]

His family is putting all the pressure on him to buy this house because he’s the only financially responsible one that can actually afford it. It’s not because they have some special attachment to it.

[@n.w.414]

But he can’t really afford it either. He will be house poor, at 21. Very sad.

[@andersonandrew112]

Buy it, sell it immediately, take the money and move

[@aaronmurphy8796]

If he bought the house and then resold it then it would be the same as the mother selling it except that he gets the money not her and the tax treatment is worse . Given that it’s clear that the reason they want him to buy it is to keep it in family not just to give him a bunch of money and pay more taxes for fun . If they could all be clear about these facts the solution would be obvious but despite Dave’s warming they will not clear it all up it will remain unclear and they will Buy it and then it will be hostile down the road .

[@cathy7824]

You can do a 30 and pay it off in 15 or less. Just make sure you won't receive and penalties for early pay off.

[@davinasquirrel7672]

Dave was like a bloodhound on sniffing out the 'future expectation' on this one. Financially a good deal if he can make it work without going under doing it, but he has to have the "Expectation Killer Clause" widely broadcast! I wonder how that one turned out (two years ago).

[@livia1256]

Could he get roommates? Make is an income generating property.

[@kiki11974]

His family is expecting too much - full stop

[@matthewwilliams9200]

Unless you can look at this as a pure investment in your future dont do the deal. Hes young and will feel the pressure of the family unless they release it in writing to him

[@georgewagner7787]

Anytime someone answers with...I mean....

[@therealmac1044]

Family and property is not a good idea 💯 it will ruine your family

[@jamisojo]

If I inherited that house I would sell it at market value. I didn't hear any good reasons to do anything else with it. Why on Earth would these women want to give away $140,000? That is either laziness or stupidity.