My Husband Lost It And Threatened Divorce Over My Dislike Of Mustard r/Relationships

[@mbyerly9680]

The abuse was subtle until OP lost her mom and her last protection. The big bad man was afraid of an elderly woman.

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

When I read this after listening to the whole thing, it made sense.

[@sister_bertrille911]

Let's face it - if it wasn't mustard, it would have been something else he wanted her to do and she didn't. He can't accept that she has the right to say no to him. He is violent and controlling.

[@WyntheRogue]

I concur, sometimes the smallest thing can reveal and unravel the biggest problem, glad OP is safe and noped the fuck away from that monster.

[@juliearmfield2634]

Yeah he's got some mental problems and instabilities.

[@paperkay]

It was many many things, she just didn't think he was the problem.

[@lifewithlee6298]

Yeah

[@ronhall5395]

I am with her. I hate mustard. The smell, the taste, etc. It goes back to my very young self. I cannot stand it.

[@vespidolive741]

The man is so toxic he makes Mustard Gas look healthy.

[@jannekelind1220]

Nice one!!!

[@ohnaliirony8997]

I giggled

[@ineedhoez]

Nice!!!!

[@LizLuvsCupcakes]

You know something, I hate mustard, and I'd rather drink a gallon of it than spend ten minutes listening to Mustard Man trying to gaslight his way out of this one.

[@lauraanderson8785]

He probably farts out mustard gas because he's so toxic. OP needs to get away from him asap, especially being in a closed-off space like a car with him would be very dangerous

[@crem-crem4070]

Story 1: I’m not sure about the rest of the world but in South Africa the husband driving incredibly fast and recklessly to threaten and scare his wife is legally considered domestic violence.

[@_BBAGG_]

Hello fellow South African ❤

[@lynnw7155]

If I was OP, I'd send the recording she made of that dangerous ride to his parents and everyone she knows.

[@LoveSasukeKai]

That's really interesting, thank you for sharing! It's the kind of thing one doesn't think of, but makes perfect sense when brought up.

[@sammieg8641]

The US is the same and it can be ramped to a felony depending how fast he is going to

[@Kris-wo4pj]

​@@lynnw7155lawyer said not to show their hand. So shes didnt. Im sure she csn after she leaves. Either way theyll probably side with him.

[@emperorwai]

OP not thinking she was a badass because she cried is extremely wrong. She is a badass for having the guts to stand up against her abuser to leave. Shes amazing and I hope her story is an inspiration.

[@whitneybennett4857]

Yeah, it's sad that someone thinks that just because they cry from a stressful situation it means they're weak. It's like, come on, OP, regardless of whether you got in his face and yelled and really let him have it or just solemnly walked away and cried in private, you still finally got the strength to get yourself out of a very bad environment before it was too late and beat this manipulative POS at his own game. In the end THAT'S what matters.

[@MrsWheezer]

I’ve told my kids there is nothing wrong with crying. It merely shows you care about what is going on.

[@trashotaku]

Exactly! She refused to back down no matter what

[@tully6648]

@@MrsWheezer It's also one of the best release valves we have. When you let everything out like that, it's honestly so much easier to move forward.

[@djdomain]

Not sure where it comes from, but I remember hearing that we don't cry because we're weak, we cry because we've had to be strong for far too long.

[@83gemm]

Let’s get one thing clear: she IS a badass, even if she cried after breaking up. You don’t have to jump around and cheering. She left an abuser. Do you know how HARD that is? Badass all the way, and so are any of you wonderful people out there who have managed to.

[@ScooterBond1970]

Someone at my workplace has a note in her office: "Sometimes bad bitches cry."

[@Depressionmillennial]

I really love how Reddit saves lives sometimes.

[@PrincessQ-fj9ly]

Yeah. Me too. Reddit may not be perfect, but I can't help but feel joy whenever Reddit help save people's lives. ❤

[@beebs4283]

Stories like this is why I always try to give stories on these subs the benefit of a doubt of being real- because if it’s fake, what? You boosted someone’s weird ego a bit? But a lot of people turn to reddit because they’re at such low points they have no idea who else to talk to. They need strangers to break through the gaslighting and abuse or even their own delusions. And like you said, sometimes in situations like that advice can save lives.

[@GallowayJesse]

If the genders were reversed reddit would crucify the man for not just eating the mustard

[@simonO712]

​@@beebs4283THIS!

[@Fingerscrossedout]

Reddit saved my life by giving advice for leaving my abusive ex ☺️ it really made my life better

[@rebajoe]

If he really thought he didn't do anything wrong, he would've just told his mom the real version of what happened confident she'll side with him, but he twisted the story in his favor instead to cover it up, so make of that what you will.

[@ljcahoe1]

Good point!

[@a3s1r1986]

I hope she plays that recording if she has to relent to mediation. Just to let him know that she has enough to scorch the earth and salt the fields.

[@helixxia9320]

Smells like a manipulative control obsessed narcisisst. despite saying they never do anything wrong they lie interestingly much about everything they do lmao

[@pollypockets508]

Great point

[@iamalbertwesker2]

Honestly I'd love to have seen the mother in divorce court when that recording of ex was played or her reaction to the protective order against him after he hospitalised her seeing her realise her son is a lying monster.

[@satansecretary665]

the fact that she called the family wretched and has other ongoing court cases im wondering if it was someone in the family that put her in the hospital. i could see it being they saw her car and they ran her off the road, or they followed her and attacked her at the destination. she had to change cars and check the cell for tracking apps. or it could have been him that did it, but i would not put it past a family told lies who think OP is in the wrong to attack her on behalf of her ex.

[@lauraanderson8785]

I highly doubt that she'll ever acknowledge that he's an abuser... She has played a part in why he turned out the way he did, she probably never told him no growing up since now as an adult he flies into a rage when he hears that word. In these Reddit stories and in my own life, I've ran into soooo many cases of mothers being down-right delusional in denying that their abusive sons have done anything wrong, even when presented with evidence they'll stick their heads futher into the sand and keep up with the narrative that their son is blameless. I mean I understand that it must be painful for a mother to acknowledge that their child is abusive, but come on 🤨

[@lizzykayOT7]

Oh sweetie, the mother knew. She asked for the lawyer's number so she could call and tell him OP was lying and unstable. It happens a lot. So lawyers in abuse cases always tell people to stay quiet.

[@Sassy_Kat]

@@lauraanderson8785Right. Especially, if he’s grown up in a house where that’s the normal way of things and he’s watched his mother treated that way. The mother likely has gone through the same and accepted it as normal.

[@azuill1126]

Unfortunately the ex MIL is responsible for raising ex, so there's a non-zero chance she's qs much of a pos as he is

[@carolsh1983]

The book was likely “Why Does He Do That” by Lundy Bancroft. It is available in audiobook as well as other book formats.

[@Aeriesan]

Agreed. It’s a REALLY good book that explains these types of men and the way they think. Scary, but interesting.

[@erikka1368]

I just read it yesterday, and OP's husband fits into so many of examples given in the book. His controlling behavior, his need to uphold his reputation (that's why he didn't like the wife pointing to the security cameras), the sexual assaults, the fact that he lied to mother about the divorce, and the subsequent hospital visit. It's entitlement to be frank. He gets to have his wife involved in what HE wants. He gets to have blowjobs whenever HE wants, as if it was a compromise! He gets all the luxuries of having a wife, without any of the work of learning her interests. I do think it's telling that OP didn't have any friends outside of her husband's. Because it's beneficial to the abuser to keep her dependent on HIM.

[@awseven1144]

Story 1: it’s never just the mustard or other silly item. It’s about control and showing that he has power. Please leave. You are in danger.

[@helixxia9320]

she left didnt you hear the whole thing

[@hi_stranger9156]

Her ex sounds absolutely unsafe to be around. So glad OP is moving on and discovering new hobbies. What a weird thing to blow up on her about. To think it all came rolling downhill over freaking mustard. SMH.

[@symonsan]

... does nobody listen to the updates? He is a dangerous to be around and the family seems to be unhinged too.

[@helixxia9320]

@symonsan ? nothing this person said negates anything in the updates

[@LadyPii]

​@@symonsanthat was just the last straw. I'm glad OP saw the truth.

[@noxiouschocolate9644]

Story 1:If op’s ex was crazy enough to risk his life along with op’s over mustard then he was going to escalate at some point - it’s a good thing she got out when she did

[@AndyyWithAY]

There's no need to share all interests with a partner. You might as well just be with yourself. And, it was him forcing HIS interests on HER. ONE mistake is telling. He acknowledges nothing. And his behavior is definitely sexual coersion.

[@WyntheRogue]

Sometimes, it's okay to be a single pringle if it makes that person happy, in this case, OP will now finally be able to experience the agency she's been denied by that entitled, misogynistic douchenugget. May she have an awesome fresh start.

[@Mario-SunshineGalaxy64]

Would love to see her ex in-laws scrambling to justify him getting seemingly arrested. Or they’re just as crazy as him, who knows.

[@autumn557]

The side sign of someone knowing they did wrong is when they lie about the situation or undermine it. He knew what he did was wrong because he didn’t tell his mother what actually happened.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

Wow, not liking mustard. Pretty reasonable reason to divorce. Not psychotic, not pushy, just perfectly reasonable. Screaming at your partner, messing with their food, all absolutely sane takes.

[@kentario1610]

Not to mention driving recklessly to threaten them into compliance, a completely measured and level response.

[@MsTemptation]

For a male with control issues it was a problem because his wants and needs outweighed hers.

[@swearimnotarobot3746]

@@MsTemptationnahh, he has no control issues. He’s perfectly sane and reasonable. What could possibly make you think he has control issues??? Forcing his partner into eating something she repeatedly told him she doesn’t want to? Screaming at her for it? He’s very level headed. Very calm.

[@angelaa7388]

He was having a really normal day.

[@65kasara]

Guy never got his arse handed to him in his life, a few years in prison for being a wife beater will show him why it's not good to do that (he'll be eating soup from the toilet using a spoon with a hole in it.)

[@AndyyWithAY]

I remember story 1. Your body is your body. I do not like mustard either in most cases. It's an enormous red flag that he is so hard pressed to try to make you eat mustard. This was abusive from the beginning. OP just didn't realize it. Take him up on the divorce. He is unhinged

[@Swnsasy]

Good morning bestie! I hope you slept well! I hate mustard too! Not a fan of hot dogs unless they are from the grill. This man WILL turn violent and she needs to go.. He's controlling and wants power over her and that's scary..

[@paden1865able]

My husband hates mustard so much that I avoid it as an ingredient in anything. He also hates pickles, and yeah, I don't make him a burger or hot dog with pickles. What's funny to me is that he can tolerate tartar sauce. 😂😂

[@Swnsasy]

@@paden1865able Oooh, I'm sooo like your husband.. I LOVE peach flavored candy but I freaking hate peaches! I have a massive jar of pickles, yummy, but I don't like them on burgers, eww.. I won't even eat them I toss them. My husband just shakes his head 🤣I hate avocado's but love me some guac!! Hate chickpeas, but love me some hummus!

[@louisejohnson6057]

​@@paden1865ableI find people's individual taste preferences fascinating. I have a friend who hates cucumbers, watermelon, and asparagus, all of which I love. I may tease him by asking him to supper and saying that I'm preparing cucumber salad, ____ with roasted asparagus, and frozen watermelon for dessert, but I'd never actually make this meal for him. And I'd certainly never behave like an overly tired toddler and have meltdown just because their food preferences differed from mine. Then again, I'm not a lunatic like Mean Mr. Mustard.

[@MrsWheezer]

I loathe mustard, bananas and cherries. My husband loves all three. His general attitude is ‘goody, more for me!’ I can’t imagine a world where he’d be offended I won’t eat those foods.

[@wessexdruid7598]

The fact that she had no friends or family of her own, is incredibly telling. Two words - 'coercive control'.

[@a3s1r1986]

"Especially Honey Mustard"... And that's when I knew OP needed to divorce this man.

[@Dina-lc4bt]

😂😂😂😂

[@JewelWildmoon]

😭😭

[@sergeipohkerova7211]

Alternative title: "I found out my husband is a crazy weirdo, what do I do?" 😂

[@britnicox3929]

So curious if the mom - that had so much to say to OP to blame her son’s action - came back in apologize?? I doubt it though because people who raise sons like that don’t typically hold them accountable for anything. I’m just glad OP is safe with support and learning how to be happy on her own! I wish her the best

[@symonsan]

She may be dangerous too. In the update she calls them his wretched family.

[@satansecretary665]

im honestly thinking it was his family that put her in the hospital and not him. she said she had to even change vehicles. so either they followed her and attacked her or maybe ran her off the road or something. this may be yet another case of the apple doesnt fall far from the tree

[@LiveLocallyNow]

A Chris Watts kind of mom

[@britnicox3929]

@@satansecretary665 you know I assumed it was him but that’s a good point… And also a horrifying thought 😬

[@paulastiles5507]

Probably not. He didn't magically raise himself to be that way.

[@LaineyBug2020]

Story 1- when she said she cried eating her family's traditional Thanksgiving dinner, I felt that in the depths of my soul and my chest hurt a bit!

[@Marchaland]

Jesus christ, poor woman. So glad she escaped with her life. Cried when she ate what her and her family used to eat together for Thanksgiving. Can't imagine how would be go tru something like this without even having family to help you. Heartbreaking.

[@dallen3000]

Sadly, the second she said that he wouldn't accept her "no" to mustard, i already know that carried on into the bedroom.

[@nyaatama8529]

The perfect apology. Buy him a bottle of the spiciest mustard and fit it with a wedding dress. She should do this while handing over divorce papers. Here is your new bride😂.

[@daisymay6505]

🤣🤣

[@ScurvyRascal]

You petty master! 😂😂😂

[@nyaatama8529]

@@ScurvyRascal thank you 😊

[@JewelWildmoon]

Put ghost peppers in it 👀

[@SilverMKI]

Nah, use any sauce other than mustard.

[@AndyyWithAY]

He put her in the hospital! I cannot express enough how important it is recognize abusive behavior early on and get out safely. I can almost guarantee this was going on well before marriage. He just escalated

[@kerribottriell-baxter7345]

Him - and his family say she probably deserved it, seeing as she called them wreched.

[@colleens1107]

Story one: I continue to be grateful for Reddit in these instances when an OP is in complete denial of an abusive relationship and the community smacks sense into them. Not want a divorce, WHY WOULD YOI WANT TO STAY WITH THIS ASS? And the scary thing is he had her isolated and was escalating his controlling behavior. The commenter who said get out now rather than in a body bag ten years from now. AND ESPECIALLY while you don’t have children so you don’t have to be tied to this guy and can just block him

[@lizzykayOT7]

I find it interesting they had no kids. He had control, and him wanting OP to himself is a dark sign from a narcissist like that. She likely would not have made it out of that relationship alive.

[@strawberrysangria1474]

I remember the mustard story from the first day it was posted. I was so scared for this woman and apparently my gut feeling was right. Her ex is completely psychopathic. I'm so glad that she was able to escape, but sad she was hurt in the process.

[@themagicconch.804]

I hope the op is okay. Her husband is a manipulative, controlling abusive. A**whole and I hope she gets away from him if you don’t like something, you shouldn’t have to eat it I’m taking her food from her and putting what he want it up. There just kind of solidifies the point that throughout the whole relationship he basically has controlled her and then him yelling at her for not wanting it after he put whatever it was he want it up there. Kind of just hits the point home but he’s a piece of trash. and she deserves better.

[@paperkay]

Gods I hope he doesn't end up killing her. Men like that lose it completely when somebody they deemed so inferior dares to abandon them, humiliating them.

[@habituallearner7680]

I have too many friends and relatives who wound up in relationships like this (one of whom is no longer with us after her husband used her up), and it makes me so happy to see at least one person out there escaped and is now living a free life. I'm just sorry that OP experienced that.

[@kathyniebylski6735]

As someone who had unfortunately witnessed this as a child, I can say that knowing the first time we moved without my abuser, it was such a relief to finally be able to have peace a quiet. I was so much calmer and happier without him and was proud of my mom for finally not taking his shit anymore. Now, 10 years later, I can say that life is so much greater and so much more fulfilling than ever.

[@starlingswallow]

Is OP's husband my ex? Good gracious, he is the one that needs to grow up! Fighting over someone not liking mustard? Yep, sounds like my man baby ex-husband. Anyone who won't allow someone else their own autonomy is an ABUSER!!!!!!!! 😢

[@carolroberts4614]

I thought he was mine! I am afraid of heights, and once my long ago ex was getting stuff from the attic, and I was on the steps. I wouldn't go right up, because getting down was much more difficult. He grabbed hold of my long hair to try and make me go up! I didn't.

[@bunnyslippers191]

Personally, I love mustard. Right now I have I think either 4 or 5 different kinds including Dijon, all our local store brand and all the same price, less than a dollar a bottle. Mostly I used the mustards on scrambled egg sandwiches along with mayo or sometimes salsa and mayo. But, I don't want mustard on a burger, just mayo, chipotle sauce, and a little bit of onion. I prefer my fries with nothing on them, and the only thing I use ketchup for is baked beans. Want ketchup on your fries? Go for it. Smother them with ketchup if you like them that way! I used to work with a gal who liked Worcestershire sauce on her fries. I tried that and it's ok, but I still prefer just salt on mine, but I'd never pitch a fit and fall in it if someone wants something else on theirs.

[@amberleeannalee1999]

My ex “didn’t believe in lactose intolerance “ and would force me to eat dairy and laugh when I was sick after. Still denying reality. He’s got the weird SIL relationship instead of his mom. It was awful.

[@helixxia9320]

@ everyone in this comment thread, im so sorry all these nasty exes happened to you. hope youre doing better

[@idalarsson6417]

I am so happy that we got an update to this post - he is legitimately insane

[@ajwinberg]

Our Society needs to stop telling our little girl that they should be the ones to apologize, even if it isn't thier fault. When they become women they feel like they have to apologize to husband's or boyfriends who are abusive to them, and they think it is perfectly normal not to stand up for themselves. Our daughters need to be taught to stand up for themselves so they don't let themselves end up in a situation like O.P. in this story.

[@DeadRepublic]

To be fair they do this to boys too. Schools teach us that meaningless "sorrys" make everything better. If you refuse to apologize for something you're not sorry for, or didn't do anything wrong? You are suddenly the villain of the story because you aren't making the adult's lives easy. Its all about brushing shit under the rug so they don't have to deal with it.

[@audreym3908]

I really hope OP can find her people , nothing romantic, but platonic. A found family/a close circle of friends would also help her heal even more.

[@madambutterfly1997]

The fact that you didn’t leave when you saw he was trying to make his interest Your interest is already telling.

[@clydethehobo2687]

Oh shit, an update to the mustard husband story! What a way to start my day.

[@Gumbier_Than]

I swear Mark, your soothing voice can make even The Brothers Grimm books sound great. 😂

[@MarkNarrations]

You're too kind ❤😊

[@ginathecookie]

​@@MarkNarrationsthey're not wrong, though

[@louisejohnson6057]

Yes! With the real Grimm's books, where feet get chopped off to save somebody from dancing themselves to death. Not the tepid versions that Disney put out.

[@LiveLocallyNow]

@@louisejohnson6057i want to see the Live Action versions of those lol

[@jeneden3492]

S1: yeah, no. This isn't about mustard at all. He's either legitimately a psycho or there's some very deep issues that he's not saying

[@StephanieNnabue]

I’m so glad that Op is ok. Of all things to set her ex off was mustard. Maybe it was a sign that she needed to leave the marriage. After all, she’s been letting him have his way throughout the marriage. The mustard incident I think must have been a wake up call

[@annamcnarin]

Her next partner should be a cuddle buddy, either a cat, dog, chinchilla, or whatever animal suits her. They're the best heart healers.

[@caylawalsh843]

His divorce threat is the, last tool in the belt, "break glass in case of emergency", fake out threat... But that's all it is, a threat.

[@Swnsasy]

Damn.. My husband knows I HATE mustard.. It's just yucky! He will tease me but divorce?! Dude is off his rocker! He's a damn weirdo.. A lot of people don't like freaking mustard.. I am not a huge fan of hotdogs unless they are on the grill.. OP needs to run! DO NOT PASS GO DO NOT COLLECT $200!! He is violent, controlling, it's all about control and power over her.. I bet there is other things that she overlooked..

[@CatLoverX74]

I remember this story 😳 I’m glad she realized he was abusive. The fact that she had to be put in the hospital and had to move so he wouldn’t know where she was says everything. I’m guessing he made the threat he sent her a reality 😢 I’m glad she got a protective order but even more glad she moved far away. She didn’t say he was arrested but I really hope he was when he put her in the hospital. I really hope OP has a happy life now and will never have to deal with her ex again. Luckily they never had kids together.

[@ashassassin]

I hope op continues to be safe and happy. I hope she decorates the shit out of her new place, and finds friends and community in her new life. I hope she moves forward in her life and has the support and love she deserves.

[@TwozySauce27]

It's really scary to think sometimes how slowly this kind of abuse builds up and that sometimes you really have to just take that first "that was a weird reaction" thought and run otherwise you end up in something like this or worse.

[@AngryBudgieNoises]

My heart just breaks for OP in story one.

[@AngryBudgieNoises]

I made a much angrier comment about the husband but copped a violation oop. Sorry that KZbin doesn’t like calling out terrible people and behaviour.

[@ZombieSazza]

It was never about the food but about controlling her as much as he possibly could, so much so that he was threatening her, driving erratically, terrifying her. I’m glad she’s out of that situation, she was never safe around him. “Leave now, before you leave in a body bag or with a broken spirit” is a very important quote, as a child abuse survivor who faced a lot of violence growing up (among other things) and was hospitalised several times with concussions and strangulation bruising around my neck, I chose to leave at 18 before I ended up in a body bag or with a broken spirit. It’s the same thing with abusive relationships, you need to put your happiness and safety above everything else, especially in cases where your apparent loved one doesn’t love or respect you. Why should you give them your love and loyalty when they can’t give you basic respect? I’d deffo be suggesting therapy as OPs idea of normality will be incredibly warped and she went through a lot of trauma, I have cPTSD, and complex-PTSD is most common in child abuse survivors and domestic abuse survivors, as opposed to traditional PTSD where you are scarred by one big traumatic event, cPTSD is suffering from traumatic events over a period of time, such as an abusive childhood or abusive relationship, where you faced abuse and trauma over a length of time where it’s left emotional scars. Things like hearing footsteps can trigger your trauma, certain sounds, smells, things like the smell of certain alcohols, feeling trapped by someone (like feeling you’ve been backed against a wall or trapped in a room), being shouted at can trigger painful memories, someone being extremely close to your face can being that all back up too. So because OP has faced abuse in her marriage for years this will have warped her idea of normality, I’ve no doubt she’ll be jumpy around some of the behaviours I’ve listed, extremely wary when anyone suggests she tries to eat something as it brings back painful memories regarding the mustard, complex-PTSD can really mess with you if left untreated. For me that was professional diagnosis, trauma specific therapy, and medication, took me a LONG time to battle a lot of my triggers but I still struggle, it’s still a daily battle against the feeling of trauma seeping into my bones and relying on support groups - Facebook and Reddit are really good for these as they have people with similar lived experiences and these support groups are free. I’d definitely suggest domestic abuse survivor groups on Facebook for example, she could even join groups that are female exclusive (some groups are mixed sex, some male exclusive) to allow a safer space if that’s what she really needs. Trauma like that is hard to battle against every day but doesn’t have to define you, you deffo need to learn to live alongside it however so it doesn’t feel like you’re drowning every day. And hell, some of your experience could help someone else! Some of the things I went through, how I escaped with a young persons charity, getting mental help through that charity and NHS (from Scotland so we have national healthcare etc), and contacting mental health and abuse survivor charities are all pieces of information I’ve been able to pass onto others, young people who have grown in similar childhoods to myself looking for help and escape plans, and honestly being able to help someone or be an ear to listen can be a huge help for that young person, you basically become the person you wished could’ve helped when you were younger and pass on any helpful information you can. It’s kind of healing in a way and you help someone out, so even tho OP has had a ROUGH marriage, a small silver lining that could help her feel good about all the crap she went through is being able to help others by passing on tips and tricks? Edit: wrote all that out before getting to the updates, I’m really glad she’s found help with support groups and charities. If anyone should find themselves in a similar situation I cannot stress enough just how helpful and understanding these groups and charities are, for me it was lifesaving (I genuinely feared my brothers alcoholic rages would kill me one day and my mother never cared) and got me housed in a secure location with staff 24/7, CCTV and a panic button to the police station like 5 doors down from the secure flats. I dunno where I’d be without that generosity, and really can’t stress enough how huge charities like this help you out in these incredibly hard times.

[@bonniebaldridge1248]

OP was/is NOT alone. My ex was like that, too. God bless her and I wish her the very best life has to offer.

[@takidsage1515]

That’s wild. Out of all of the reasons for divorce, they have people arguing over a damn condiment. WOW. The husband sounds psychotic.

[@TeeCup22]

I am SO proud of OP in story 1. I hope she’s in therapy & has all great things in life 💖

[@boneymeroney2674]

I recall a similar story with the mustard family. Condiments are such a weird thing to freak out over. There are hundreds of different options. I realize it wasn't about mustard.

[@VidWatcher01]

The fact that he asked her staright off the bat what she got on her hot dog right there shows he was looking for a fight. It was NEVER about the mustard

[@EvonneLindiwe]

Story 1. The man hates her.

[@FoxValley123]

Op is such a badass. She got away, she did what she needed to and is safe. She is a true badass.

[@lunerwerewolf]

I hope OP finds a Cat or a Dog she can welcome into her life. They will give her unconditional love and support and walk beside her for the rest of their lives

[@keanufryer8181]

OP she consider herself a true survivor. Her husband was such an arsehole! His mom is the typical “my special boy” narcissist enabler. I hope she recovers and really loves her life. She should be proud!

[@charliesangel1]

My heart goes out to OP both my parents were abusive but I vowed I would break the cycle cause their parents were as well and I'm married to a good man who treats me right and is patient with my traumas we even talkabout them some go deep. He's also seen how my family treated me first hand.

[@dragonpasta5880]

Story 1: I remembered hearing this story from rslash and my first thought was how insane it seemed and how fast it escalated I hope the OP stays safe and healthy

[@MsTemptation]

I’m happy that op has gotten out of that situation and is taking care of herself mentally and emotionally. People should stop wanting a person who just got out of a bad relationship to jump into another. Seriously just stop that nonsense. It’s okay to enjoy your own company and grow in self confidence. If you love animals then get a little pet for companionship. But never jump back into dating until you understand that it’s okay to have boundaries. It’s okay to think about your feelings and needs. You don’t lose you while trying to please and make someone else shine. Whatever you do for them should also be met with reciprocation for yourself. Never ever volunteer to be a doormat because doormats are for walking over while cleaning crap off of one’s shoes.

[@MasteringMason]

I remember hearing this story, glad it got more updates and OP is living well. This story also reminds me of another story where an OP's BF got mad over milk.

[@amyalpin6251]

I hope that after whatever he did you her in December that put her in the hospital, he own parents realized that he was the aggessor the entire time, a disowned him. He deserves jail time for his behavior.

[@debbiehines6803]

1. He's a control freak. His trying to force you to like something is a huge red flag. It won't end well. Yes, you are in danger. Tell him not to threaten you with a good time. Let him get a divorce. Tell him to get lost.

[@lostshadows768]

Lesson: Always side eye anyone who includes something like "mustard" as one of their hobbies. Hobbies are things you enjoy doing, not your personal preferences.

[@ndawn90]

The book OP was (hopefully) talking about is called "Why Does He Do That?" By Lundy Bancroft. That book is literally a lifesaver. I'm firmly of the belief that that book should be required reading in high school. It would save so many people from getting into abusive relationships.

[@averycheesypotato]

Idk… sometimes would-be abusers learn new tactics from things that are supposed to be therapeutic. Definitely teach kids & young adults their rights, what resources are available and that they can say no to anything that might come up in a relationship, at any point. Definitely teach them self-respect & self-love. Put books like that in the library for any who might need it. But I just don’t know if resources meant for those surviving abuse should be “mandatory” in class?

[@rainmeh4255]

Judge: so why are you loooking to devorce your husband today Op: because i dont like mustard. Judge: ok... Explain....

[@fcold9402]

1. WTF. Embarrassing? Whats Embarrassing is yelling at someone for not putting mustard on a hotdog.l

[@CareyBilley]

Get the divorce, this man is a control freak.

[@heidifruchtl354]

Oh my God. I saw this pop up and I told my younger daughter that I was really looking forward to listening to it. She loves mustard and she was very interested in hearing about the whole story. I support both girls in regards to food. I get her mustard packets, by the boxful. But none of us pull this kind of crazy.

[@DindellaTheDefender]

"Don't look this divorce horse gift in the mouth" immediately reminded me of the Horse Divorce bit by Drawfee. Makes me hope the update is that the horse is happening.

[@NotAFanOfHandles]

The correct reaction to hearing someone doesn't want to eat what you like is "more for me." OP's ex is... yikes, just... all the yikes.

[@beccaf262]

I feel like this story is an example of why reddit is so quick to say that the most seemingly innocuous things can be evidence of someone having wider character flaws

[@FlamesofJagger]

Oh man... I never thought you'd cover this one Mark. I wasn't even sure it was real til now. You're the second youtube reddit reader who's covered this story that I know of. Husband is quite psycho over this.

[@LizLuvsCupcakes]

I had been hoping I dreamed this one.

[@heatherdickau5335]

I live in the southern USA and people are passionate about grits, sweet tea and football. And no one has ever threatened me when I say I dislike those 3 things.

[@luizad2277]

Story 1: ‘I don’t want to be a divorcee’ - this made me the saddest, that so many society and cultural ‘norms’ are geared around victim blaming that pushes women into staying in abusive relationships

[@LizLuvsCupcakes]

And, what’s wrong with being divorced? Sure it’s expensive, but what exactly is wrong with admitting you were wrong or that a situation has changed?

[@hermitcat2022]

"When people show you who they are, believe them". This.

[@MaggieTheCat01]

This is a lot darker than I expected it to be. 😳 What an effing lunatic. Don’t ignore red flags, people! 😧

[@ryliegirl93]

I was in this situation with 2 kids.... I got to the point of ending myself if I couldn't get out... my mom gave me a room at her place in exchange for labor on the farm. He drove by every nite and honked call 100+ times a day most days. I was to scared to get a protective order because my baby sitter said she would drop me and then I couldn't work. It took me 2 years to get divorced. Everyone thought I was I liar because he always wore a mask in front of other people... I am now finally talking about it a bit more to encourage other men and women to leave if it looks like that...

[@FanFicnic]

Story 1: that thanksgiving story made me cryyyyyyy

[@kentario1610]

"it felt like they were with me that night" brb sobbing my eyes out

[@TheHellsHobbit]

#1 This is not about the mustard, OP needs to leave him, Op is in danger.

[@izuela7677]

I started watching this wondering if she was forbidding him from eating mustard in front of her, or something. But no, it didn't even make that little sense. Leave and don't look back.

[@errantwinds-up8uu]

Oh man, I remember this story. I'm so, so glad that OP is doing okay now. This kind of thing is so scary - especially to see how people can be coerced into believing all of this was normal.

[@bessieburnet9816]

...Well, safe to say she's gonna be looking at mustard more favorably from now on...

[@ghoullovinbutch]

OMG ITS THE MUSTARD GUY. I haven’t heard this one in a minute.

[@destinedtogame]

r/slash lost a significant amount of subscribers with how he handled this story

[@lizzykayOT7]

I was so relieved and happy for this OP, for surviving and getting out. It was heart-breaking hearing her talk about the initial divorce as "his choice" - she was in so deep. So thankful that she still had the presence of mind to be wary and to save herself. Some learn to ignore those flags and well...we know what happens. The MiL definitely knew and her asking for the divorce lawyer was telling. Lawyers tell you to keep that info on the low for good reason. She was 100% going to gaslight him into thinking OP was unstable. BTW, I love mustard, it's my fave condiment. When she was listing the types she tried I was all "she hasn't tried Dijon, it's mild" (lol) then I wondered if she had a sensitivity, because it sounded like that a bit. I am a picky eater and forcing food on someone is alarming behaviour. Maybe just poor manners at the minimum, but hostile and rude in some cases.

[@YoYo-gt5iq]

He drew a line, and it wasn't in the sand. It was in cement.

[@sassyscribe8642]

Reminds me of someone I dated very briefly. He was really bothered by the fact I’d order a sweet cocktail over beer, wine or something stronger and when I expressed confusion about why he would care, he said some nonsense about food and drink being important to him and he wanted to share that interest w/ a partner. Turns out: he wanted me to drink and eat exactly as he did. He was troubled by numerous other differences between us, like friend time separate from each other and how often we saw family. Each difference would result in a long conversation about his feelings about the difference, a reiteration of, “I just need to know my partner and I agree” and I had an almost constant stomachache for 2 months. I’ve never been more happy about breaking up w/ someone or more certain it was the right thing to do.

[@viennperidot1119]

Story One: Grown-ass man complaining that there's no competition for his mustard. Mate, my wife hates Marmite with a burning passion so I get it all to myself. I hope she's able to get away from that abusive, dangerous twatcannon safely

[@yukitenchi1513]

She eased into everything else he wanted when it came to his hobbies and tastes so easily, the mustard was one of the small snags in his plans for the "perfect companion" and that's what did it. He didn't want a partner, he wanted someone to control where there would never be conflict, disagreements, or debates on anything because it's all what HE wanted and thought he needed.

[@lina9535]

Let's be real for a minute. He embarrassed himself at the gas station, by grabbing her hotdog and slathering mustard on it.

[@thekameru6058]

Story 1 - Im glad shes out and away. She sounds like she outclassed that asshole in every way and deep down he knew it. Unrelated, mayo mixed with a dab of mustard can be really good.

[@TheMimiSard]

It is a minor detail, but I really respect OP's Thanksgiving dinner. Last year I went to my brother's place, and because he has an unreliable oven, I got precooked turkey, roast vegetables and salad from a takeaway place, and gravy. I also favour frozen turkey roasts for Xmas, as they are far easier to handle than a whole bird. We have done the whole bird in the past, but switched to the roasts when we found them. Steggles is an Aussie poultry brand with a large range of frozen goods, and I respect them majorly.

[@nothereyetlost]

“Are you saying I’m not normal” no dude dude, you are NOT.,

[@AdrielDoesGaming]

I'm so glad OP is safe, alive, and happy! The ex-husband is a horrible and disgusting human being!

[@hodgeelmwood8677]

That man was a control freak, abusive creep. Not surprised he married someone with no family or close friends. Abusers zero in on people like that because they're easier to isolate. SO glad that OP escaped!

[@annegrey6447]

I’m glad she’s safe & doing better, but I also wanted to hear this psycho is behind bars where he can’t trick & hurt another woman.

[@jackchop1576]

He sounds like a borderline and/or a narcissist with that level of rage.