My Wife Is Questioning Our Whole Marriage After I Requested A Paternity Test r/Relationships

[@WatsonAndDaughter]

WStory #1: "sHe'S cHeAtInG oN mE" says the cheater

[@WGottefried]

Yeah, and "I wAnT mY pRiVaCY" while demanding to go through her things. What a catch, right!

[@HellstreamGames]

Most accusers are the one cheating before the relationship implodes

[@yourmom2189]

What a trash human being. He doesn’t deserve to have a family.

[@dreamer9398]

Every accusation is a confession

[@streamerssaymyname]

OP: "I want to stay married to her" Also OP: Goes on dates the moment she is out of the house and reveals he snooped from her phone and laptop, but he won't let her have his phone password because "he deserves privacy."

[@rmhartman]

he doesn't want to lose her, but won't do a damned thing to keep her

[@ingloriousbetch4302]

Guarantee he's was cheating the entire relationship

[@helixxia9320]

he probably cheated long ago and was just projecting

[@helixxia9320]

yeah ok he confirmed it later in the post Lol

[@lynnw7155]

Plus he's on OKCupid and Tinder. Yeah, when you are "working on your marriage" you DON'T go on dates with other people. He didn't want to be married (or he wanted to be married but free to date?)

[@Buff_Helpy]

The story made me not like the guy, the update made me utterly despise him.

[@orchidoxs126]

Same buff helpy same

[@catT5236]

He's damn lucky she didn't actually go nuclear & was far more amicable than he deserved.

[@persephoneszeliga]

I agree!

[@janejane6754]

Me too he's so terrible.

[@AutumnForest862]

Yup. Separated is still married. Dating while separated is still cheating, unless BOTH spouses agree otherwise. He's a misogynistic jerk to think he deserves his privacy and she doesn't.

[@ughicanteven5896]

"I think I deserve my privacy" First off, OP has demonstrated every reason not to deserve privacy. Dating profiles?? Seriously?? Second, does she not deserve her privacy?

[@Themrine2013]

Not only that in long term relationships let alone marriage there is no such thing as privacy

[@Broeckchen]

@@Themrine2013 I mean, there can be. I don't like letting people on my phone and my partner of 7 years never pushes that. But also, it has to be within reason. Having to conceal business information because it's sensitive? Reasonable. Wanting to browse Tinder in private? Unreasonable!

[@Themrine2013]

@@Broeckchen and i agree. but like i said in a long term relationship like that there is zero privacy even work related

[@ronhall5395]

This dude is the dumbest male I have ever heard of. There is no privacy in a marriage. Period. You share everything. He could have found out if he was the bio dad during a normal amino anyways. All he had to do was keep his mouth shut. Heaven accused her of cheating, while he is on Tinder. Dude does not deserve to be married. He omitted the entire part about dating others while she was trying to.figure out if he was worth staying married to. Obviously he did not really want to be married. If he did, then he is pretty dumb. He did everything wrong. Refused to work on the marriage, refused to share his phone info, refused counciling and never admitted he screwed up. She did the only thing she could. He did not leave her any choice.

[@Tijggie82]

@@Themrine2013 definitely always there is privacy. It's not healthy to force people to share everything, especially when there is trauma or sensitive information (like for work or other people's secrets) involved. That being said, I guess it's up to what kind of relationship you'd want.

[@FriedaMMartin]

Story 1 each update made the guy worse and worse. Disgusting, making excuses, cheating, and STILL thinks he’s in the right?! His wife needs to run as far as she can. I’m glad she divorced him and hopefully she gains full custody of the child.

[@MaryTheresa1986]

Same here. I hope OP loses all rights to the child and his ex marries a real man who will love her and the baby.

[@Regrettable-Username]

It was like an onion of garbage

[@reneedaughter]

...and put him on child support

[@Russman67]

I'm trying to figure out where in the story this guy was actually trying to "save" his marriage. A Tinder account? I don't know about everyone but I think that a Tinder account is a definite "Fuck this marriage" move. Let's all hope this guy is a better co-parent because as a husband he ain't shit.

[@emtims1670]

MTE. I was shaking my head the entire story.

[@fytrndm]

I had to pause and put my phone down several time.

[@Midnight0Mistress]

I get the feeling that he thought everything would fix it self so he didn't have to do any work to fix himself.

[@ineedhoez]

That part....

[@user-kl8lo6rj5i]

Sounds like a future incel.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 1: so dude acted controlling, insecure, and untrusting the entire relationship. Then was super shady about his phone and actually doing things himself that made him look like a cheater. He wants a paternity test and when asked if he thought she was cheating, he said yes with no reason....except there was a reason: protections. So they separate while she figures out if she can trust him and can work through the marriage with his insecure and untrusting ways and his response is to CHEAT ON HER....but that's not really cheating, amirite guys? They were separated so it's OK, right? Then he refuses to get any therapy despite his behavior and insecurities being the cause. What an idiot. Dude blew up his whole life because he's an insecure tool bag. He's a cheater and projected his behavior onto her.

[@manxiefeathermoon9888]

I don't know why people thought the ex was overreacting when she was accused of cheating with no proof.

[@Mewse1203]

@@manxiefeathermoon9888 me neither. He was actively cheating and projecting his bad behavior onto her. What an asshole.

[@cheergiver]

@@manxiefeathermoon9888 probably because he left out a ton of info in his original post. Though honestly the request would have been enough alone for me.

[@KyrieChii]

Yeah, the 'no reason' thing was BS, he was screwing around behind her back, so when she became pregnant, he couldn't help but attribute _his_ behavior to her & assumed the worst. He just kept digging the hole even deeper going on dates while they were separated, having a dating app profile, & not wanting to give her his phone pass code. I'm thrilled that the wife got out of that toxic relationship with a philandering hypocrite scum bag .

[@gypsygem9395]

Yes, this!!

[@Daydream_N]

Story 1: imagine actively trying to get your wife pregnant only to accuse her of cheating the second she's actually pregnant

[@jenchristelle]

Covert Narcissist Logic.

[@kellywaters643]

I snorted

[@d.l831]

Right?! It sucks lol

[@TarisLuna]

All while cheating yourself

[@nationalsocialism3504]

Paternity Insecurity is a legitimate concern men have... this dude just took what should have been a mandatory medical test in a healthy society into his already existing insane controlling/insecurity behaviors.

[@AndyyWithAY]

OP is even worse than we thought. He's on multiple dating sites, he has a passcode, he rifles through her phone where she has private confidential information. She needs to get child support at least

[@manxiefeathermoon9888]

He wanted what he didn't give to his wife. He's a massive hypocrite. He's a controlling monster. And those stats are also about sperm donors not being the donor they selected. There have been many cases where the fertility doctor used his sperm and not the sperm they selected.

[@elaexplorer]

Right, it doesn't matter if she makes enough right now, anything could happen and they may need that money in the future.

[@magnarcreed3801]

@@elaexplorer Na. Have a kid and be ready to support it. Leave that pos out of your life forever.

[@101Mant]

@@magnarcreed3801 child support I'd for the child, she may be fine now but what if she becomes unemployed or sick in the future? Its irresponsible unless the father is dangerous she has to hide from him.

[@magnarcreed3801]

@@101Mant And? Figure it out then. If you want your kid you figure shit out. Not sure what custody their figuring out, was confusing.

[@MsUnamusedNerd]

So OP doesn’t want to give his wife the passcode to his phone because he feels he deserves privacy…… Yet he wants access to everything on hers? Just say you don’t trust your wife and go along with the divorce

[@KittenUndercover]

And he was the one who was caught on Tinder and POF!!!

[@jenchristelle]

@@KittenUndercover The audacity to claim memory loss on that part!! Then pretending not to know why your wife went nuclear on you. OP was trying to play/ gaslight us. 😤😤😤😤😤.

[@WobblesandBean]

@@jenchristelle "But BAAYYYYBEEEE, I don't remember! I had amnesia, I can't be held responsible for what I did!"

[@MsUnamusedNerd]

@@jenchristelle Yeah him forgetting that he made a dating profile and was actively going on dates is absolute BS! He purposely left that out of the original post so he didn’t seem like such a bad guy. His ex-wife is a saint and he should be grateful that she is handling this so well. So many women are way more vindictive than that. She’s not even coming after him for child support/alimony whereas most women if they were in her position would take him through the ringer. Ex-wife is a queen!

[@ginathecookie]

ikr?

[@wrenpeach6707]

He needs her pass code but won't share his because he deserves privacy, yet insisted she pay for an expensive medical procedure violating the privacy of her uterus to prove herself despite her giving him no reason to doubt, then immediately tried dating other people. Incredible.

[@megannason3649]

Yeah what a narcissistic tool

[@crazycatlady1425]

Amniocentèse can provoque miscarriage too

[@AndreNDP]

I mean, in fairness, she was going to do it anyway, though I do agree that it's his baby too and he should pay her half. Honestly, he sounds really misogynistic. He seems to feel he deserves her trust without showing any reason why, and more than a few why not. And at the same time, he refuses to trust her without any reasoning for it.

[@damien678]

The absolute nerve is shocking

[@joec8321]

husband has the right to question. We all know that most of wifives will gaslighting their husbands

[@MiraTheWarlock]

"I don't want to give her my passcode because I need my privacy" Oh hell no

[@magnarcreed3801]

Yep. I’m willing to let them into anything work related only if it goes both ways.

[@charitynordstrom5734]

I'm glad the wife in the first story had the spine to leave him. Dude was a complete tool the whole way through

[@WhitneyDahlin]

Men have a RIGHT to know for sure that the child they are raising is indeed theirs. That is a literal human right. Why is the mothers ego and pride more valuable than the mans peace of mind and human rights? Like is your ego and pride really so high that you would rather deny your husband his human right to know for sure? We wouldn't have this problem if there weren't monsters walking around pretending to be loving mothers and loving partners while they're really conning men out of time money and emotional energy and tricking them into raising and paying for a kid that isn't even theirs. The problem is women The problem isn't men. If this wasn't such a common occurrence if there weren't so many terrible women in the world men wouldn't have this fear. And even if they did have this fear they still have the right to know for sure it is a literal human right. He doesn't need a reason to ask for a paternity test. Do I need a reason to exercise my right to freedom of speech? Do I need a reason to justify why I want to eat food? No you don't need a reason behind human rights. They're the right of every human being

[@catandrobbyflores]

Hes the entire toolbox!

[@avarralythande5129]

@@WhitneyDahlin sure they do. But this dude even admitted she always let him know where she was, etc. there was no reason for him to be suspicious except that he’s such a tool and he’s been reading on the internet🙄 add that to the fact as soon as she was gone he was on Tinder, wouldn’t give her his passcode OR delete his tinder profile while accusing her of cheating and snooping through her phone, finances, etc. this guy never really wanted to make things right, just wanted her to go back to the same old routine of him being a hypocrite.

[@Ms777Lena]

I don't understand why is it such a big problem to ask for a paternity test even if there is no suspicion. Woman knows 100% if a child is hers, why not make it just as certain for a man?

[@WhitneyDahlin]

@@avarralythande5129 it doesn't matter. He doesn't NEED a reason to justify why he wants one. Period. It is a human RIGHT. Do I need to justify why I should be able to use my first amendment right to free speech? He doesn't need a reason or suspicion. He shouldn't have to justify why he wants one. He wants one. The end. That's enough of a reason

[@johnodotca]

Story 1: So concerned that he may father another man's child that he virtually ensures another man will be the father of his.

[@natytambasco]

LMAO

[@emtims1670]

Well damn, ::cackling::

[@arianebolt1575]

Paternity tests cost more father-child relationships than they establish, it seems.

[@Midnight0Mistress]

So ironic. And she will find someone way better. A woman with that much patience is a saint.

[@manxiefeathermoon9888]

Story one: he admitted he was accusing her of cheating. Of course she is not wanting to be married to OP. The Op is cheating. Of course he is projecting. He wanted transparency from her but won't give it to her? Christ. He's a controlling monster. He doesn't deserve his family at all.

[@brokenrabbit8817]

Preach! and all the choir says "Halleluiah! " ( sorry couldn't help my self! but you got it spot on!!!!! the wife needs to run)

[@nataliereeves3594]

I think a retraining order and sole custody for the wife are needed here. This man is not right in the head.

[@timtompkins8774]

"I don't want to give her my passcode because I think I deserve my privacy". All he's done their whole relationship is invading her privacy while he sneaks around and does stuff on her back. Are you serious?

[@icu8202]

I laugh 😂 out loud when he said that. What a hypocrite asshole !

[@lily-zg6io]

Yeah Idon't believe for a hot minute OP "forgot" about downloading Tinder and OKcupid when he wasstill married, and going on dates just a few days after accusing his wife of cheating. My guess is that he didn't include it to sound more sympathetic, which also makes sense since he values his privacy but snoops through his wife's things, doesn't work on himself and seems to only take in the comments that agreed with him, from his "like some of you said, it was worth asking" (like yeah so worth accusing your wife of cheating when you're the one cheating)

[@videofan1010]

Cause that's not related at all 😂... He sucks.

[@shells500tutubo]

And let's be real here, he's been dating all along, not just since the pregnancy. She should get child support and go for full LEGAL custody. If he moves nearby I could see him getting 50:50 physical custody, but I w ouldn't trust my child with someone like him over a total 24 hour period.

[@Kimberly_Sparkles]

@@shells500tutubo He won't move nearby. He needs narc supply. He'll have a new person in 6 months to feed him.

[@ronhall5395]

He obviously did not want to be married. He can't be that stupid? He is a complete tool. Worthless a spouse. He will regret this in a few years. Threw it all away. I think if he had done 3 small things she would have stayed married. Apologize, share his phone ( drop the dating apps) and treat her with respect.

[@cjandauntieyaya1446]

The first story: OP is a narcissist and it is obvious. His first statement saying that they decided to date because they were "compatible" was the initial indicator. You don't date because you are compatible. You date because you are emotionally/physically/both attracted to each other. Then he talks about the statistics of women cheating and making their husband pay for the child, but he didn't say anything about the husbands that cheat and get their mistress pregnant. He was always one sided on his concerns. The update explains why. He had TINDER on his phone while he was married to his wife? She's pregnant and he's considering dating other women? The whole idea of his wife cheating was just his internal way to justify his desire to cheat. We find he's been so controlling of his wife but he never reciprocated. He feels he deserves his privacy, but she doesn't deserve HERS. He even gives a stupid reason why he doesn't think he needs therapy. Narcs hate being analyzed because they hate the idea that someone can criticize them. IMO, OP's ex should start getting a file on OP so that she can protect the baby from this asshole. I'm thinking he'll project all his fears and insecurities on the daughter and harangue her and take away all her privacy. He's going to emotionally abuse that poor little girl.

[@FionaChandoll]

Attraction by itself is not enough to sustain a longterm relationship. Common goals and compatibility goes a long way.

[@jessicadias5014]

I wouldn't dub OP a true narcissist simply because narcissists are completely incompatible with feeling any remorse and always find someone else to blame. OP is taking SOME responsibility although too little too late. In my experience I've met people who weren't necessarily "bad" but they could only understand the world through their own perception. That being, they weren't incapable of feeling remorse, but they couldn't empathize with other people for the life of them or understand how their actions would affect everyone else. A good example of this in media is Rose Quartz from Steven Universe.

[@magnarcreed3801]

Na you need compatibility. If you don’t shit doesn’t normally last. Imma need someone with similar hobbies and goals.

[@MrJpaynebb]

OP's updates just make it worse. He's a selfish, controlling POS. He gets to rifle through her phone, computer and email. His electronics are on lock down. He demands a paternity test put doesn't want to pay for it. He downloads dating apps and goes on a few dates while she's waiting for the paternity test he demands. She wants to go to counseling to work on their marriage when he accuses her of cheating but he initially refuses. He literally created this entire situation from his own insecurities for no damn good reason. She actually tolerated the double standard of him locking down his electronics while letting hers be open. It was the cheating accusation that broke her trust. Saw a comment from a lawyer months ago. They said once you toss out that cheating accusation, right or wrong, trust has been broken and often cannot be rebuilt.

[@MikkosFree]

There is a Filipino saying: People fear their own ghosts.

[@kimberlyterasaki4843]

Nobody is more insecure about cheating than a cheater. You see it all the time with these stories.

[@catharineholton49]

I'm the most insecure person in the world I think.. but I am NOT a cheater. I'm the product if, not just a broken home, but a destroyed one, and was always afraid history would repeat itself. I would never cheat in a million years, but was terrified that if I lowered my guard, I'd be hurt. I never was, but didn't stop me being convinced it would happen when I least expected it.

[@LindaMeade]

The French have a proverb: No one looks under the bed unless he has been there himself.

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

​​@@catharineholton49 thats clinginess not the same type of insecurity as the op showed Or maybe im wrong

[@shhd2105]

Funny how op "forgot" to mention him getting caught on tinder and ok cupid and acts like he was trying so hard in therapy he went on dates a few days after she leaves, anyway op as azz and knows it

[@JordanDragonAs]

And he never went to therapy he lied

[@Emily-ck9ji]

OP in story 1 was projecting. Hard. Most cheaters to. They assume that if THEY can cheat, then their partners must be cheating, too. Which is illogical. It blows my mind that he was entirely unrepentant about his "privacy" when she herself was a terrible human if she wanted the same. Especially since it seems like her job involves sensitive information. She never once gave him reason to worry (which he admitted). I suspect he was probably hoping she actually was cheating, that way he wouldn't have to feel guilty about his behavior anymore. Good on her for finally walking away from the marriage for good. He obviously isn't interested in changing.

[@adeletaylor6143]

" I think I deserve my privacy" Jesus Christ. The lack of self awareness is stunning.

[@fabiocandelori9163]

Ok, I usually say, that we need to realize that, at this point in time, asking for a paternity test is implying you think your partner cheated and is trying to pass the child off as yours, but this guy didn't even imply it, he straight up told her he thinks that, and he is wondering why someone wouldn't want to reconcile after such an accusation? Really?

[@groofromtheup5719]

Maybe if hospitals didn't actively work to hide paternity fraud, guys could be more trusting.

[@Cendy777]

@@groofromtheup5719 It...doesn't really apply here though. Guy left some major details out of his story and his accusations sound some serious projection. I think that perception of how often paternity fraud occurs skewed in its favour as we always hear those cases, but we don't hear about the cases where it isn't the case. That leaves an impression that it happens far too often than it actually does. Ultimately, it all boils down to cheating. Both genders have the same chance and opportunities to cheat. Those who want to be sure about paternity ultimately doesn't believe their partner is faithful. This leaves so many questions about the flaws in the relationship. Whenever there is an actual reason to suspect cheating, paranoia or projecting-it is an indication your relationship has deep trust issues that you need to work on or break up.

[@groofromtheup5719]

@@Cendy777 well, obviously projecting here, but that doesn't mean hospitals are not required to pull the wool over a guy's eyes in the case of apparent paternity fraud.

[@sigisig3941]

@@groofromtheup5719 are you a troll? in what world are hospitals helping in paternity fraud? Only the woman knows (if there are not to many mans). I am really interrestet in that logic of yours? I did not know that doctors and nures can see the DNA of a child by just looking at it.

[@fabiocandelori9163]

@@groofromtheup5719 dude, you act like hospitals care whether a girl is cheating or not. They don't, their job is just to ensure the safety of their patients, mother and baby included. They have no reason to hide anything about paternity.

[@MovableNu]

Story 1: I wonder if this is actually the first time he's acted like she could be a cheater or he's shown he's an unreliable partner. Maybe she just gotten tired of ignoring his red flags now that a kid is on the way? After the update: DUDE!!! WTF? You are a straight-up AH! Jaysus! You need to get yourself into SERIOUS therapy! And she needs to not go back to you ever! And if you don't get yourself sorted with a quickness? You'll be back in about 15 years asking why your teen never wants to visit you again after you took their bedroom door off the hinges. 🤦🏿‍♀️

[@SorenPenrose]

Must be, I cant see a rational person tossing an entire marriage for one mistake. OP was def an idiot, but I can't see how that alone spells divorce.

[@shrubman3422]

@@SorenPenrose Op had shown himself as a hypocrite and didn't trust his now Ex. He could go through their phone but when it was the Ex's turn to look through his phone oh "my Privacy". Always asking for the Ex to prove themselves but he never had to. Then he is seen on Tinder but he says "he isn't cheating." Even if he wasn't cheating you don't go looking around for a relationship while you are married during reconciliation. The final nail in the coffin was even when they were they were in consulting he still was whining about his Privacy when he had no issues invade hers. This "man" has no problem hiding stuff from his Ex always accusing them of cheating and the Ex got tired of feeling like they were always on trail. Not matter how many time they proved their innocence he would come up with something else not to trust them over. They will never trust their partner and was looking to start a affair. Throw the whole man out.

[@DaverSomethingSomething]

@@SorenPenrose how you get through all of that and conclude “one mistake” is mind boggling, but seems to be something you have in common with OP.

[@SorenPenrose]

@@DaverSomethingSomething no i made that comment before hearing the details. I was saying upon hearing his initial post that there has to be more to this than just asking for a dna test. I was right, OP is a complete dick. edit: OP of the story, not the commenter here

[@golden_leader9227]

Story 1: often times people like this are 100% projecting. My best friend's father was like that too. Her mother couldn't do anything to not be accused of cheating, while later they found out he had multiple side chicks, paid for s*x and gambled all their money away while still playing the victim.

[@Aaron-kj8dv]

the entire time he was talking like "She never cheated and I have no reason to believe she's cheating" I was like "yep this dudes definitely cheating"

[@alezot6141]

Story #1: I thought OP was bad enough in the main post, but then he kept getting worse and worse at every sentence in the update. 😬

[@gypsygem9395]

Yeah he doubled down in a big way!

[@nathanhinman9069]

Story one he accused his wife of cheating after he regularly rooted through her phone and e-mail while denying her the same. He had Tinder and OkCupid before all this and immediately started dating while supposedly trying to “fix” the marriage. This guy was a projecting cheater and got what he deserved.

[@Flufferz626]

My goodness projection much on OP's part. This is disgusting, and I'm a woman not against paternity tests but this...this is something else. It's awful, he is awful and doesn't give a flip about his child.

[@dagnytheartist]

Story 2: Shout out to OP's dad for being one of the best dads I've seen in these stories! I was expecting him to call out the sister's boyfriend for being a liar, but instead he gave him other options and was nice while still making it clear that he can't give him the original job and that the boyfriend would have to be honest with OP's sister. That was so much nicer than I might have been finding out that someone was lying to my face about themself.

[@user-wr3vt8uq4s]

If Noah made a mistake from being incompetent it could cost the company, therefore affecting everyone. Don't tell lies, kids!

[@terramarini6880]

@@user-wr3vt8uq4s Yep, no shade but not having the necessary degree makes him a huge liability for the company. The dad was gracious about the lie and made a very generous offer. Noah would be well advised to accept this offer and make full use of it. Stop waffling and get the degree young man.

[@sgm8265]

From sister's reaction to OP, sounds like bf blamed OP for him having to confess and losing the degreed position. Keep an eye out and your gut engaged for that one. Especially if he takes the offer.

[@InfernalPume]

nah dad's a piece of crap. he's got two competent daughters but is bending over backwards for 'the son he never had' to be apart of his company despite him being a shifty lair. he also told his daughter to 'cut the crap' for trying to expose him, as if he's already favoring this loser over his own kids.

[@dagnytheartist]

My mom told me that if your SO suddenly becomes paranoid about you cheating on them, and this behavior comes out of nowhere and with no reason, that's a sign that they're cheating on you and projecting. Also, that if they suddenly behave in an intensely irrational manner with no explanation, it's usually that they're cheating. I thought it was a stretch when she told me that, but these type of stories have shown me she is right.

[@KadeStringer2.0]

That’s not always the case

[@krazycats564]

Never been prouder of someone for a breakup than the wife in that story

[@anyaarcadia9166]

The second story, OP saved their sister from being further lied to. I don't know why they clash in general but considering how her first thought seemed to be to call OP to see if she both knew about it and for how long she knew, only to blow up on her afterwards, it gives me a sense she has a history of blowing up when things aren't perfect or when she's embarrassed and OP is even slightly involved.

[@audreym3908]

Yep. Also I think you're one of the few to post about story 2. Edit: spelling and grammar 🤦‍♀️

[@anyaarcadia9166]

@@audreym3908 I only found 1 or 2 comments about the 2nd story so that only fueled me commenting about it too!

[@mifphilip]

honestly since op sister reacted the way she did i might be inclined to think she knew and just wanted to get her SO into her dads business.

[@jennydrake491]

I find it amazing that OP's dad would still consider giving Noah a job at all when he was trying to scam his way into a position he wasn't qualified for. And OP's sister blames OP instead of her lying, scamming husband? It figures.

[@TiffWaffles]

The fact that he spoke about attending one university before claiming he misspoke and said he went to another the moment he found out that OP knew somebody that attended the first school made me snap my fingers and say that he was lying. While, universities are huge and there's a chance you don't know the names of everyone in the programme you're in... much less the whole school, you would just say that you wouldn't know the person but reiterate that you went to the school. It's just... why lie? That seems rather stupid.

[@AndyyWithAY]

OP needs some long and intense therapy. He is so incredibly emotionally damaged. He's so damaged and doesn't even know how he's wrong. He needs therapy and to focus on his child. He doesn't need to consider dating anyone. He is so incredibly unstable

[@asmith8692]

Makes me wonder if someone in his direct family (parent, grandparent, sibling) was invasive to his privacy or cheated on their partner 🤔. This emotional damage happened somehow.

[@KyrieChii]

Agreed, & he's also a controlling, gas-lighting, cheating, hypocritical, scum bag abuser. He needs to get his act together instead of subjecting another woman to his unacceptable behavior. This guy has more red flags than a communist parade, so I hope he can find a therapist who enjoys a challenge...This sort of person doesn't usually respond well to reality checks.

[@bessevaraven859]

@Hakura Chii honestly men like this should be eunuchs and never have sex or partners. They will literally destroy every relationship that they're involved in

[@michamocha]

S1: This story is just a huge reminder for everyone that unreliable narration is a huge thing in this sub. He conveniently forgot to mention any of this additional information? He forgot to mention how he was controlling and hypocritical? Bull. I don't believe he forgot, he wanted to paint himself as innocent as possible.

[@lunabelle01]

Agreed. He's a manipulative, abusive, A-hole.

[@ajzephyros7454]

he tried painting himself as innocent as possible, and still came across as a total ass

[@One.DeSanctis.]

Yes. I find it enjoyable to listen to Reddit stories with an ear to how trustworthy the original poster/narrator comes across. There are often small inconsistencies that I find indicate an uneven accounting by an OP. Finding the "tells" of an unreliable narrator instead of taking the story as straightforward.

[@videofan1010]

Omg - he's got some nerve being on dating apps and getting upset and asking his wife for a paternity test because SHE'S a cheater... Crazy.

[@Ospyro3em]

Oh god, OP. You sunk lower and lower with every sentence

[@christyclarissemercier6359]

I haven't listened yet but wow I'm scared

[@FlamesofJagger]

Yeah ... seeing a comment like this lowers my enthusiasm for the video

[@carolroberts4614]

He dug himself a hole, and I think he should pull the hole in after him!

[@iris5678]

Hopefully that OP gets some major help, does some major self-reflection, and one day becomes a better person

[@KittenUndercover]

@@FlamesofJagger really? I like the vids where the OP is the AH lol

[@jennifersilves4195]

This can't be real. "Admitted" she was happier without OP. Dude CHEATED.

[@Mewse1203]

Story 2: I like how the sister reacts as if OP is the asshole for figuring out dude is a liar and not the dude for lying. Dad seems like a good man, but I don't know how much I'd trust a person who would lie to EVERYONE about something like that and expected to take a job after only 4 months of relevant schooling. This guy is not a good person in my eyes and could have done any number things to damage their business.

[@chaosundividedreborn]

My money is that the sister either knew and was banking on her dad not checking, or she didn’t know and she reacted badly because she’s embarrassed.

[@ACCER]

Yeah, I can see not having graduation photos (I skipped mine) and not having your degree in your immediate possession......but when mine was lost I paid to have another one printed and sent (Then found the old one a week later where I had put it so I wouldn't lose it.....) but when you add it all together it was kind of obvious he was lying. It's been decades and I'VE never once "misspoken" about the name of my university........that right there should have been enough.

[@t.matthies3049]

@@ACCER The only situation I could see misspeaking your university name happening with is if you went to more than university (i.e. started at one, finished at another which Noah attempted) and/or have more than one degree. But than you'd still have your degree(s) to back you up.

[@nataliesiddle8507]

@@chaosundividedreborn I didn’t attend my graduation either as it was poorly organised and I didn’t receive any form of notification of the date. Plus we didn’t have camera phones, so not sure what any of my photos of that era would show that proved I was at University other than that I seem to be in a different town than the one I live in now? My degree was validated by a University, but the campus was a college so I do feel off when my family say I attended ‘University of #@£*’ when I never went there, they just gave me my degree, as it sounds like they’re trying to make out my degree was classier than the reality 😂 I actually don’t have a copy of my diploma, I just have that random piece of paper with how they calculated the score etc. I’m thinking of getting a photo of me in holding a rolled up poster in a Hufflepuff robe …

[@sylviajones6745]

I know this question is not related to OP, but talking about replacing the degree. My daughter lost her high school diploma in a fire. Does anyone know if or how one could get a replacement?

[@didyasaysomethin2me]

Story 2 Update: OP's dad sounds like one helluva standup guy to go so far out of his way to offer so much patience and support to someone who just can't quite seem to make it off of the starting line. I wish them all the best in the end.

[@keplersdream901]

Story 1: I approve of the OP's wife's actions. I'd have also made him sign away his parental rights. Guys like him are not good fathers and they never grow up. She's better off as a single parent with the dad forever missing.

[@dcg590]

Suuuuure. Prison stats say otherwise

[@browhattheactualfu-2659]

The thing that rubs me the most that this was completely random and unprompted. Imagine finally having a child with the one you love only for them to seemingly flip a switch for no reason. That must be heartbreaking. Op's poor ex

[@browhattheactualfu-2659]

Omg the update was even worse. I could write an essay on how much this man sucks and how his ex wife didn't deserve any of what he did to her

[@보모]

_although I demanded we fix the marriage that you broken by leaving me when I finally became a dad yet felt it was not mine during my attempt to get you back so what I went on a few forgetful dates that’s not cheating you just don’t respect my privacy or follow orders_ this guy wants a pet not a relationship

[@gilesclone]

OP’s ex got lucky. If he hadn’t made a huge unforced error she might have been stuck with this loser for years.

[@ThePurple628]

That first OP is incredibly lucky that his ex-wife is who she is because she handled that with a ton more grace than I would've. I've never wanted to punch a perfectly good stranger more in my life.

[@catandrobbyflores]

Agreed. Personally I would never let him see the kid.

[@groofromtheup5719]

@@catandrobbyflores well, moving long distance is basically doing that.

[@catandrobbyflores]

@@groofromtheup5719 the two of them were talking about him potentially moving nearby to co parent but I wouldn't allow that much if it were me.

[@groofromtheup5719]

@@catandrobbyflores you wouldn't have the choice, and normally it takes a court order to permit a person to move away with a kid when there is shared custody. The guy certainly isn't a person to emulate, but he is rolling over for her after the break-up of the marriage.

[@catandrobbyflores]

@@groofromtheup5719 depends if the mother moves before or after baby is born.

[@ThePinkBinks]

He picked a fight so he could cheat. Yikes.

[@dharling97]

I hope the wife in the first story ends up taking him to court for childsupport for her to put it into the childs education.

[@Ash-mo7oc]

Wait...you don't consider dating people as cheating while trying to work things out on your marriage??? Ok let's put down some definitions for you: 1) casual sex- your relationship with your partner is purely sexual and there's nothing significant going on. However, you are married and you'll need to know the boundaries first BEFORE you proceed. 2) friends with benefits- your relationship is both sexual and emotionally beneficial. While there's no intention of taking things further it can be an issue for a married person trying to work things out so find out your partner's boundaries BEFORE YOU PROCEED. 3) dating- you have full intention to being committed to your relationship with this person and are emotionally invested in this person. Unless you are in a marriage that has no issues with polyamory, THIS IS FULL BLOWN CHEATING. You are a hypocrite not just in your issues with privacy but also a hypocrite in every aspect of your relationship. Ask yourself this, are you ok with your wife to date other dudes while you two work on your marriage? No because the reason why you even look into her stuff is to make sure she isn't dating some side dude. You don't see your wife as an equal, you see her as someone to control because you are an insecure little man that can't see the error of his ways even they are pointed to you.

[@보모]

considering how low the bar is for her to be considered a cheater yet obnoxiously high for OP it makes you wonder if any of his _non-cheating_ appeared in his previous relationships but denies as he apparently is someone that fails at self reflection

[@renlosee5223]

At point number 3 - even in a poly ship, this would still be considered cheating as it's clear no discussion was had about what's allowed and what's not. Even us poly folks would flip a lid if we found dating apps on our partner(s) phones or were locked out of things while expected to be completely open.

[@janicewilcox8590]

Wow. "I cheated, I lied, I was controlling, mistrustful for absolutely no reason, I was unfaithful in every way possible. Why did she leave me? I'm clueless." I guarantee you that EVERY person that said not the ahole in your first post CRINGED at their NTA rating before you even got through your first sentence on your update. Even the ones that had been bamboozled into raising other men's children that were sympathizing with you.

[@Brttan]

Story 1. I’m so happy for the wife. This situation was terrible before the test. This man is horrible

[@FleurR007]

If my husband had demanded a paternity test I would have left him too. I know who the father is and if he couldn't trust me then I wouldn't want to be with him. And I would have assumed my husband was the one cheating just like OP was. He said he went on dates AFTER she left but he was on dating sites BEFORE she left so he was definitely projecting his behavior on to her

[@johnowen9349]

Story 2: Just get an education background check, it's how businesses confirm a new or prospective hire's education credentials, especially when hiring for a position that requires such a degree. If the father doesn't intend to do this already it would be nobody's fault but his own if he gets scammed. But as it directly involves the OP and other members of the family, I think it is wise to approach dad about doing as much. It requires little input from the person being hired, stuff they would need to give to the business anyway to be hired in the first place.

[@sammidoneff]

I wish there was a shorthand for “Ah, yet another post with a M30+ and F20s partnership where the guy was controlling and awful. Why am I not surprised?”

[@sammidoneff]

It’s like the Chekhov’s Gun of AITA. If you see it in the first act, you KNOW you’re going to see the guy show his true colors by act three

[@sammidoneff]

Chekhov’s Age-Gap

[@darylebrown3253]

The first damn second he stated "I don't know why I accused my wife of cheating, but I accused her of cheating, oh poor me!" I KNEW he was cheating. Classic narc projection, and then it turns out he had Tinder and OKCupid on his phone their whole marriage 🤪 Of course she does not deserve privacy, after all everyone must be as much of a dog as him, it's normal 🥜🥜🥜🥜

[@KE-hr4sb]

S1: Holy fuck. Dude paints a "Woe is me, I had a moment of insecurity and my wife went nuclear" story. Then his wife comes in with receipts! And it's still him telling the story! Makes me wonder how much worse it would have been if she'd been allowed to tell it in her own words? He fucked around and found out.

[@EgirlKnievel]

If I had a husband like in story 1, the first stop after he accused me of cheating would've been the abortion clinic. There is no way I'm permanently tethering my life to someone like that let alone being forced to expose one of my children to a person like him. He's gonna accuse his daughter of all sorts of things and tear through her belongings, too.

[@renlosee5223]

I wouldn't personally abort a baby in this situation. (also if I remember right, it was around the three month mark that he asked, right? If I recall correctly, there are abortion stipulations after 12 weeks in US? I could be wrong on both accounts though, but point is it might have been too late?) But I definitely agree with you that there is no effing way I would want my baby connected to a piece of trash to OP, which is why I don't understand why the wife is letting him maintain any sort of relationship with the baby. I personally think she should go NC 100%, get a restraining order. The money she needs to receive needs to be direct deposited in an account separate from her every day account and her address changed to one he doesn't know. I seriously don't trust him not to do similar shit to the little girl. I feel like that girl will forever fear the sperm donor.

[@Parasolhyena]

@@renlosee5223 I think depending on the state it's 20-22 weeks' gestation? I mean that's what the internet says that a lot of states have? With some states only being 12-13 weeks with new bans?

[@renlosee5223]

@@Parasolhyena Ah good to know. I am not sure where I heard the number in the first place (or when -- hell it could have even been a TV show and we all know how accurate those are 😂🤣😂🤣)

[@VidWatcher01]

Well the overturn of Roe v Wade has definitely made that almost impossible from what I heard

[@BusArch42]

@@VidWatcher01not impossible. You have to go somewhere like california that has zero restrictions

[@jodieg6318]

Story1: Abusers never think they are abusers. This guy is an emotionally abusive, manipulative, and so shockingly lacking any kind of self awareness or empathy it would be surprising if he has narcissistic or pathologic tendencies.

[@lisamac2403]

Sometimes when I hear stories like Story 1, I’m amazed that people don’t hear how crazy they are when they read it back. I mean, he’s going through her phone and computer, but gets mad if she wants the password to his phone? In the first post, he asks to go to Counseling then in the update, he doesn’t want to go. He’s begging to gets his wife back AND going on Tinder dates. So glad his wife got away, I hope he gets help before he dates anyone else. But we know he won’t.

[@iglowinthedark3645]

Lying about having a degree is serious . I will never want that type of person working for me. You could kind of understand the reason why he was lying to get a job but he really had no excuse for lying to his partner

[@Kati_P]

Story 1: OP is the kind of person who gets the sniffles, hops on WebMD, and self-diagnoses their "cancer".

[@ScooterBond1970]

Correction: OP is the kind of person who merely reads and anecdote online about someone getting the sniffles, and then self-diagnoses his "cancer".

[@zachanikwano]

"Rules for thee but not for me" as a person. Also "I will hold you to higher standards than myself because I care about myself more than the health of the relationship"

[@WGottefried]

Wait a sec - so despite being paranoid as hell, dude was on dating apps? Unless he was on those to see if his wife was too (which is still sucky) he's such a massive hypocrite.

[@aishalee5924]

Projection 😂

[@BusArch42]

He admitted to going on dates right when she left. They were still married.

[@IKKclauKR]

This story made me soooo freaking mad!!! I laughed out loud when he said that he "loves his wife"....OP is disgusting, and I hope the wife keeps away from him

[@lisakaz35]

Story 2: tell Dad to check Noah's references, esp. professional ones, since the job isn't based on his last (retail) job.

[@Tanjaaraus]

Last story; Most people acted like adults (I am looking at you Nina), and even if there was some initial issues it was solved excellently by OP and her dad. Honesly, as someone who dropped out of college, I totally get the embarresment it brings - but I just say I never went to avoid it with new people, and joke about my useless student loan with no degree to my close friends who do know. It's luckily not the end of the world. I hope Noah takes this moment to face his fears and accept the less ideal job to at least get out of the retail hell, and I'm sure he will get a lot of respect in Dad's book if he does that and does the job well

[@charliep5991]

Story 1. In the first update he says that he doesn’t want to give over his logins because he deserves his privacy but yet he goes through her phone and laptop all the time. I would love to know his rationality behind all of this. I am so glad that she is leaving him.

[@sarahjaneheckscher6737]

Story 1: he downloaded Tinder, and OKCupid, then decided his wife was cheating 😳 and then wonders why she’s out the door? He blew his own life up. No sympathy. He probably will be a disaster dad too.

[@carmenbarrera80]

#1 wow talking about a self center man I am glad his wife was able to see that OP was NOT worth it, and was able to see all the pain, mental and emotional abuse he was putting her true. What a nice spine..!

[@EphemeraImaging]

That guy is so self-centered he can't see daylight for being up his own arse.

[@huinismith]

Story 1 (before the updates): I don't know where this story will take us, but I don't think any woman with a minimum of self-respect would get over this. Oh, one more thing: this is what happens when people extrapolate data out of context: overgeneralisation.

[@kemonono]

Good luck with the updates lmao it just gets worse

[@huinismith]

@@kemonono Holy mother of God, 🤦🏻‍♀️what a piece of work!

[@kemonono]

@@huinismith fr it's just so sad to be honest

[@memyselfandi7782]

Story 2: I don't think OPs sis blocked hates him, I think she just feels embarrassed that she was duped for that long. Not to mention that she's probably bragged or told people about his false qualifications

[@lillianpilto2377]

I think paternity tests should be normalized. HOWEVER, If you’re gonna be all “I want a paternity test” whilst unwilling to compromise, such as letting your wife check your phone for her own peace of mind, you deserve what you get. Asking for a paternity test whilst also praising your wife’s fidelity just reeks of “I’m a cheater or want to cheat and I’ll find every reason not to trust you.” If you’re gonna question your wife’s fidelity in the conception of a child, without cause or evidence, then you should be willing to have your privacy invaded for her own peace of mind. If you have nothing to hide in either side it should be of no issue

[@youshallnotpass112]

O.p does not deserve this woman nor do they have ANY business being in a relationship with this level of insecurity and mistrust. You got one thing right though. Counseling is needed. For you. Regardless of the outcome that counseling is needed.

[@rickraber1249]

2nd story: Dad should not hire Noah - he's dishonest. 4 months of college total is a far cry from any degree at all. 2nd - Dad wants this guy for a son-in-law??? So he basically wants to provide for his daughter by providing her husband with a job. Hopefully the sister will come to her senses and see this guy for what he really is.

[@tamsel814]

Story 1: update 1 oh so OP assumed his wife cheated on him because he was or at least considering it Oh this just gets worse and worse.

[@brycekline982]

WoW, what a piece of work this guy is. "I read a statistic ONLINE that says she must have cheated" (paraphrasing) so it must be true. OP, stay single and BTW, until the ink is dry on the divorce papers, YOU ARE STILL MARRIED.

[@NightEyeStudio1995]

The guy listed all the crap he did wrong in the relationship and yet he didn't understand why he couldn't save it?! He needs some serious therapy cause there are so many deep seeded issues here. SO glad the wife got out, like holy hell!

[@Dracojax]

Wow that guy just grabbed the shovel and ran with it.

[@godking]

If it gets to the husband asking for a paternity test the marriage is over regardless of the results. As it should. Personally I believe that a genetics test NOT a paternity test right after birth should be mandatory.

[@itsalwayshalloweenexceptwh5118]

I think it's a good idea if there was a standard test that tested for serious diseases/defects and paternity. Of course at the moment this isn't standard and I don't know the costs involved. It would also be great if this was possible in the future in a less invasive way. One of my friends had a test done whilst she was pregnant to screen for defects, and she told me it was a horrible experience (huge needle through the belly iirc).

[@HandleUnclear]

I agree with genetic testing, I've been saying this for years. However, men like the OP (and those in the comments who only advocate for paternity, because a "man will never know") only care about their ego. They don't care about the baby nor do they care about the woman they're having the baby with (obviously it depends on the circumstances). I would disagree that after birth testing should be done, I think genetic testing during pregnancy is the way to go. You can terminate if the baby has health issues you may not be capable of coping with, and a man will not have to waste his time and resources for 9 months if it's not his.

[@BusArch42]

@@itsalwayshalloweenexceptwh5118it is awful. It’s amniocentesis and that is what he made his wife go through. There is danger to the baby also

[@annnichols3091]

Story 1: The wife was smart to dump that jerk.

[@DerekScottBland]

So many people say a healthy relationship is where you can exchange phones for a week and not worry. No. A healthy relationship is where you don't feel the need to ever look at the other person's phone.

[@magnarcreed3801]

Na I agree with the first one. Not even dating wise but any close friend or family. All mine know my passwords. There is snooping and then there is passively using.

[@DerekScottBland]

You're not understanding what I said. I know my wife's passwords, she knows mine, her computer is right next to mine if I ever needed to hop in it for anything. My point is that people claim these "trust" exercises of exchanging communication devices, revealing all passwords, etc is a healthy relationship. I say no, a healthy relationship is when your partner knows these things just because, not because you feel they have to know them so they can check what you're doing online. If your partner suspects you to that point, you have severe problems that can not be fixed with access to personal devices.

[@ForenzaAudio]

"She think's I'm projecting" No. My guy. you ARE projecting.

[@zashgekido5616]

I honestly love how silent the people who usually agree with this mindset are right now-

[@cheekyftoro8962]

Exactly where are all the men deserve to be sure comments.

[@seikouchan]

Story 1: The fact that OP can write out such blatant red flags of himself without a cringe, allows me to presume he do not think it is a big deal for doing what he did to his ex-wife. Good luck with the next SO that decides to be with him.

[@jennywhite2462]

An Amniotic test can be extremely dangerous. It is a risk not as much as it used to be but still it carries risk. It should not be given to make a douche feel better. How would this man have felt had his wife lost that baby due to his own insecurities. I am happy she has some self respect and spine I would of been done too.

[@lilywong9672]

She did say she wanted to take it regardless just to check for any birth defects.

[@sylviajones6745]

I had that same kind of test when pregnant with my youngest daughter. It was 1977 they wanted to see if her lungs were in good condition to be born a few weeks early. It's an awful feeling. Every time they tried to put the needle, and it's a big one, into my stomach, I kept putting my hand over my tummy. They almost had to tie my arm down. I didn't want anything to happen to my baby. I didn't realize how protective mums are to their babies. Anyone else have amnocentis done? I had blood clots in my leg and lungs. Two shots of heparin a day..

[@strudel_reviews]

I was offered one in my second pregnancy because it was discovered via NIPT that I'm a silent carrier for Spinal Muscular Athropy and they wanted to see if Wubbzy was going to be born with the condition but I turned it down because of the risk of going into preterm labor and I had complete placenta previa and was extremely concerned about it

[@CM-by4ib]

That update! That update! I don't know what I did wrong *lists 50 things that are a deal breaker by themselves for any normal person*

[@HeidiSholl]

The ex-wife in story 1 has got to be one of the strongest women going! I wish her all the best, and she will be an excellent single mum. Especially considering she is pregnant, she is extremely level-headed. I definitely think the grass will be greener for her now she's not being suffocated by lying, cheating, hypocritical OP

[@ember612]

Story 1: I think we have seen several similar stories to that, but on the side of the wife, which usually would say for the wife to run. She for sure did the right thing leaving this dude. I'm mortified that he doesn't see how in the wrong and trully toxic his actions are, especially on the update, as if the original post wasn't bad enough.

[@paden1865able]

Earliest I have ever been! Had a great weekend, we made our son's dream come true by finally finding a Darth Maul lightsaber kit and buying it for him. He's a huge Star Wars fan and collects lightsabers. The look on his face was precious, almost crying with joy as it was put together and handed over to him. This was the number one item on his Christmas list for five years and at last we were able to give it to him. I love seeing him happy.

[@BruinPhD2009]

That. Is. Awesome!

[@gabak1292]

Story1: Yeah that's how you build trust, installing Tinder and going on a date🙄. Some People never learn!!!

[@diamonddiva3204]

story 1 OPs wife should run far and fast away from him!!

[@damien678]

Did Story 1's OP *seriously* use that paternity test as a way to justify cheating (subconscious or not)? I was bloody FLOORED by that update and how he was writing about it all.

[@MsBELLE7]

Story 2; all the sad has to do is ask Noah to request a copy from his college so they can put it up on the wall or something innocuous so Noah has to give it to him. Also colleges make it pretty easy to get your transcript and degree for a reason.

[@StandYourGroundHomestead]

Wow... that first story. I've never uttered "wow" so many times in my life... just... wow.

[@soulreaper1427]

I love the fact that he say that they are both faithfull and he is on tinder and some other dating site...What a hypocrite,he doesn't deserve her at all

[@RockyGems]

OP's wife has the patience of a saint, dear god

[@magagail]

“Forgot” to mention the cheating. He knew he wouldn’t get any sympathy, he was just trying to make himself sound better. What a POS

[@JasperCatProductions]

Wow dude just blew up his life and wants to put it back together. If I were her I would divorce him and demand the child support. She deserves so much better then OP. Your dad is still hiring Noah after he lied…… wow what is wrong with your dad? Nina mad at the wrong person. Chumps.

[@Junodragon6780]

Like somebody quoted, " men have the right to ask for a paternity test, but women have the right to how they react." A woman freaking out about their spouse accusing them of cheating (without physical evidence {Photo, text message, or video} btw) is NOT PROOF of them cheating! But it is proof that their man does not trust them AND the accuser could be cheating! Keep this in mind if you think about asking you wives for a paternity test with out photo or video proof of infidelity! Trust goes both ways men. -_-💢

[@chelseamadisetty350]

So asking for the paternity test is literally the LEAST shitty thing he did.

[@ppfau7948]

On the first story, I'm very glad that she got tid of him :)

[@kiab2324]

Story 1: I'm glad she left him. He wanted an excuse to cheat even though he was probably already cheating with all the projecting, searching her stuff, and yelling "respect my privacy". He tried to manipulate her into staying while making no effort to change. He is a narcissist.

[@AndyyWithAY]

The dad's really great. The lying is terrible for sure, but degrees are not what they're cracked up to be. That's for sure

[@mk_gamíng0609]

Depends some degrees are useful, and some people get degree and then never use them lol, My eldest Brother got a history degree, Then proceeded to learn coding and web-design by himself and then got a job in that sector. Obviously being able to have any degree on your CV is good, Because it at least can tell your potential employer something about you.

[@smiley4995]

Honestly I can get how he may have ended up that way, sometimes things spiral and you just don't know what to do. Hope things turn out well for everyone

[@101Mant]

Depends a lot on the field and how much experience the person has, as time goes on that becomes more important and relevant. Not being a lier is a massive plus too.

[@matthewpopow6647]

Story 1: I try to envision every story from the best angle possible... but WOW that guy, he trickle-truthed the hell out of us.