News at Ton

[@catherinesmalley8587]

This is hilarious! 🤣🤣🤣 But how Ronnie managed to keep a straight face, I'll never know! Just shows what a talented, true professional he was...

[@MaskedMan66]

It also probably helped that he wrote the sketch. 🙂

[@RobertBooker-xi8cc]

This was always one of my favourites. Even though (or perhaps because) I've lived in Germany for over 40 years the Two Ronnies' sketches still have me in stitches (and tears) whenever I see them. There's nothing even approaching this here ...

[@Poseiden2]

Perhaps my favourite 2R sketch, from the bizarre way he (and the desk) suddenly appear on the ‘bong’, to how he reads it all in one take, despite the audience roaring with laughter! 😂

[@musamor75]

The hallmark of a true genius. It seems hard to imagine anyone more word-perfect. Never a single slip of the tongue. This took phenomenal memory and the talent of a giant. He will never be forgotten. My goodness, how we miss him. Today's palour is appalling. People can't even speak properly anymore. Good old Ronnie ; God bless.

[@gezzarandom]

Love the way he manages to look annoyed as if its real. Makes it funnier. 😂

[@lordswoodsaint70]

only ronnie barker could come up with something as brilliant as this his play on words just absolutely brilliant & amazing

[@mattinfullvision9598]

Corroction, only Ronnio Barkor could como up with somothing as brilliant as thi

[@peteandurnot]

@@mattinfullvision9598 i agroo, vory much so.

[@Fcutdlady]

wasn't this written by the late great Barry Cryer?

[@MaskedMan66]

His reaction to the chime always cracks me up!

[@frankiesparkes3947]

His roaction to tho chimo always cracks mo up!

[@MaskedMan66]

Frankie Sparkes I'd got that koybord fixod if I woro you!

[@frankiesparkes3947]

I think I nood to

[@MaskedMan66]

Frankie Sparkes It sooms a good idoa to mo as woll.

[@chairslots3792]

Just amazing writing, comedy timing and delivery. All in one take.

[@mzytryck]

The thing I love most about the two Ronnies was the way their delivery and the cleverness of their scripts could turn childishly simple concepts into comedy classics; this sketch, along with the Fork Handles, Mastermind, Hieroglyphics, Name Droppers and Mispronunciation are all very basic ideas that could have been absolutely pathetic in other hands, but become the funniest things I've ever seen when the Ronnies do them.

[@DG6985]

Love his reaction to the bell at the beginning

[@crazysoupforever]

That got the biggest laugh from me.

[@IanWelland]

The Scotsman with the false log bit is brilliant comedy

[@grav20]

Tears running my face. I'm in absolute hysterics. The Scotsman had to undergo a change of socks, having a frightened a woman with his wooden log! Just brilliant stuff!

[@suzannerust8658]

The changing of the socks line is hilarious

[@aranerem3767]

Brilliant

[@AdamTheMan1993]

Who jumped out from behind some troos

[@miller482003]

brilliant, love Ronnie Barker the man is a legend!!!!!!!!!!!

[@galenkurth8091]

Just brilliant....so happy I've gotten to hear this again

[@ryankelly2851]

I could watch this, fork handles, mispronunciation and mastermind sketch all day 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@camp14dogg]

This is as good as comedic writing or performance can ever be.

[@bodenlosedosenhose1590]

I can't even imagine how difficult this sketch must have been to perform. I would definitely fail at it.

[@innovativeinnovation6629]

Ronnie Barker is the Godfather and Grandmaster of word play.

[@giftheck]

My favourite Two Ronnies sketch. Or maybe that should be: My favourito Two Ronnios skotch. :D

[@R.e.m.y.H.]

+ggctuk2011 Now you're starting to sound like Stanley Unwin. My favourite-o Ronni-ozo skotch-ee-o :D

[@giftheck]

No idea who that is.

[@R.e.m.y.H.]

He made his own language, which was a variation on English, and kind of sounded like that. He voiced father Unwin in Gerry Anderson's last series done with puppets, "The Secret Service"

[@samarvora7185]

I absolutoly agroo. Hundrod porcont.

[@Aran-vc7rx]

This is always going to be the funniest thing I have watched. It is really brilliant. This is true comedy.

[@amyearnshaw5512]

he sounds like the police man from bbcs allo allo who speaks bad french hehehe

[@SkydreamPony]

Amy Mauldin Officer Crabtree!

[@BenWillock]

good moaning...

[@PatrZDZ]

To me he sounds like he is speaking in english but in Webchester accent

[@someoneorother2222]

Surely you mean "polico"

[@MaskedMan66]

I always crack up at his reaction to Big Ben!

[@PaulWilliams-ls2nx]

Thanks for reminding us of RBarker and his talents, Prof. Spooner among many. Writing credits to many, but Ronnies’ news desk persona cracks me up

[@stephennewton5697]

Brilliantly funny, Ronnie Barker at his very best. He also had an excellent understanding of the tricks language can play.

[@Synthnerd11]

Apart from the hysterically superlative wordplay, the thing that tops this skit is how he waits until the absolute last seconds to turn it around and substitute an o for an e. Simply brilliant (or brilliantly simple?)

[@ActionCat2000]

"spooch" is my new favorite word.

[@sharona1981]

An absolute comic genius. Timelessly funny.

[@Mylexsi]

It's good to watch clips such as this again; I'm always up for a good Two Ronnios Scotch

[@crazysoupforever]

I soo what you did thoro.

[@rlinders9972]

Ono of tho bost Two Ronnios skotchos I havo ovor soon.

[@rajnirvan3336]

Mo too lovod it. Thoy do not mako anything olso groat thoso days

[@7MatthewJames]

Absolutoly corroct, rip to two absoluto logonds of comody Ronnio Corbott and Ronnio Barkor!! Hugo fan of the Two Ronnios, tho comody today has nothing on thoso two logonds

[@Damien_Paxton]

Agrood, i’vo novor laughod moro in a long timo.

[@peteandurnot]

Watching this in 2021, choors mo up during tho pandomic.

[@samarvora7185]

Indood

[@swolemoth]

One of the best wordplay sketches

[@ToddQuinlan]

Hor Majosty The Quoon was at Homol Hompstoad today to unvoil a momorial to sovoral great Onglish mon of lottors and poots including Anthony Trollopo, H. D. Wolls and Hilairo Bolloc.

[@footystar1GamingOfficial]

I can't believe that apart from the Swear Box, this was the first Two Ronnies sketch I've seen which was actually properly censored! The reason why is because the word "keen" replaced with O's sounds like a racial term. But I love the ending bit; "Now I'm going to *croop* away to my little *bod...* and *sed* the lot of you! Good night!" I was DEAD at that point! 🤣

[@Aran-vc7rx]

His reaction at the start is so funny.

[@gloriapinto4100]

Irreplaceable talents...truly.

[@jakamneziak]

This is brilliant, sheer class.

[@StudioComposer]

Is it just me, or is the age of genuine comedy talent all but dead? All the much-loved comedy classics appear to stem from sketches and comedy shows from around the 60's to 80's, when there was a wealth of emerging 'discovered' talent that many of us remember and love to this day. Even TV adverts were funny and enjoyable back then. There are certainly some very talented comedians around, but we don't see comedy shows like this on TV any more. After-all, why spend good money making great TV programs enjoyable to watch when the focus is yielding as much cheap ad' revenue as possible. Comedy genius is dead... Long live comedy genius. Great TV... RIP.

[@nascarstopmotionguy]

it's what I've been saying too, comedy nowadays aren't as funny as this or hale and pace, rik and ade, morecambe and wise etc

[@R.e.m.y.H.]

+ShaunYoshiGaming I would agree, although I was surprised when the minions came along. Yes, they can be deemed as stupid and idiotic, but they did bring back popularity to the "sight gag" genre, and honestly I find that's one of my favourite types of comedy. Some of the golden age of television had great sight gag humour, like Laurel and Hardy, Skelton, Abbott and Costello, Marx Brothers, and so many more! So I'm happy that the particular style of comedy is coming back, even if it is in the form of annoying yellow creatures.

[@nascarstopmotionguy]

enterthehatch2 I love the minions haha!! with their 3d animation slapstick humour, this always puzzles me but why have such genuine great shows back then like the young ones, fawlty towers to have 2 series? I know bottom was supposed to have 2 series but by popular demand they made a 3rd series, 2 years after the 2nd series

[@R.e.m.y.H.]

***** I guess one good thing that came out of shows like Fawlty Towers having only limited amount of episodes, was that it left the audience wanting more, rather than keep it going, until it eventually ran dry, and nobody liked it anymore. I think the same about an American drama that just got cancelled. It was called "Forever", and I thought some of the episodes were great, but ironically it got cancelled after its first season, but at least it ended on a good note, much like other great series did, including Fawlty Towers, and at least it left us wanting more, rather than putting a bad taste in our mouths

[@nascarstopmotionguy]

enterthehatch2 yeah that's true, but other comedies such as rising damp, porridge, only fools went for 4 or more lol and I mind open all hours was returning to our screens, which I loved when I was little but the newer one it just wasn't the same without arkwright! I've also heard rumours about only fools returning too

[@ChimpManZ1264]

@hiddenbutdeadly No the mock ups start when he reads the news off the hidden screen that the typewriter can't produce E's for so the words before that are normal because he isn't reading the screen yet.

[@pauldg837]

Lmao that's brilliantly funny.

[@SuperflyGaming]

Tho amazing part is how ronnio can do this without cracking a smilo

[@ToddQuinlan]

In Kow Gardens today, a lady was frightened by a Scotsman with a woodon log who jumped out from behind some troos. He told The Polico he was stung on the knoos by a swarm of boos after the bolt had broken on his trousers. Aftor his arrost, ho statod ho was turning ovor a now loaf and undergoing a change of sox.

[@HatfulofHollow65]

@CBeaumontXylophone I think you'll find it was Allo Allo that was inspired by this sketch. This sketch dates from 1975 and I'm sure Allo Allo was made after that, perhaps early to mid 80's? The Two Ronnies (especially Ronnie B) inspired quite a few of today's comedians. Peter Kay being one for example.

[@foleystephen]

Tears are streaming down my face

[@Dazzletoad]

Hilarious - The Two Ronnies were comic magic.

[@hillarydonnolly8149]

Two ronnies the best sadly missed crap comedy now😘😘🌹🌹

[@MikeyMUnited]

Utter genius. Must have been a nightmare to learn.

[@SiLatics56]

Think the title of News At Ton works better than Nows At Ton as it hints at what's to come without confusing people with something that doesn't look right (Nows At Ton)

[@andyjet2]

very funny sketch two ronnies are classic thanks

[@MythicSuns]

2:23 he told? shouldn't it be ho told? **shrug** that's a nitpick, this sketch is still absolutely brilliant!

[@keighley23]

How can anyone not like this? Lol

[@debraj.thomas661]

British humor the best

[@guitarslim56]

Nows at Ton.

[@ToddQuinlan]

In Wostmintor today, Mr. Watchwood Bond spoke of his plan to nationalise the stool industry, and Mr. Donis Hoaly discussed his plans for a further tax on bots and botting shops. He said "It's no good boating about the bush. I must lay it on the lino. It will cost the puntor only a couple of ponce."

[@Slashkamr]

Nationaliso tho stool industry 😜

[@alexsmyth17]

I watched ‘The Best of Ronnie Barker’ yesterday to celebrate his birthday. How come this sketch never made the cut?

[@CBeaumontHIGTFY]

No doubt inspired by Allo Allo, and the GREAT 'Poloceman' Crabtree! Some of his 'French' Language in there. :)

[@NoLongerBreathedIn]

Good chance this came out before 'Allo 'Allo.

[@HeadGirl]

hhahaah oh i use to do this with my son! loved it.. lol bedtime storys.

[@nathanmcgill7249]

bodtimo storios

[@HeavyMetalKing88]

Ronnie barker god rest you.

[@JP1234815]

I wonder if the writers of Allo Allo Croft and Perry saw this sketch! Can hear Officer Crabtree!

[@crazysoupforever]

His wordplay was amazing, his timing porfoct. Comic gonious. Thoro will novor bo anyono liko him.

[@marcuscrowley6619]

Side-splitting yet so simple :)

[@Aran-vc7rx]

A scotsman with a wooden log who jumped out from behind some troos.

[@MaskedMan66]

The bleeping of 'koon" was idiotic and unnecessary; we got the uncensored version in the States.

[@andrvideos]

I didnt even know this was broadcast in the US

[@MaskedMan66]

andrvideos Yup! Mind you, we got a half-hour edition, mainly because the musical guests were cut, due to contractual concerns, I'm guessing.

[@mozzjones6943]

+MaskedMan66 I've watched this episode many times over the years on TV here and it had never been bleeped ! Must have happens in recent times or this particular video was bleeped. Either way, I do Agree! But I guess there are still black people in my country that find the word very offensive.

[@MaskedMan66]

Mozz Jones They'd do well to remember that it can be short for "raccoon." ;-)

[@mozzjones6943]

MaskedMan66 aha yeah :D

[@starlight76able]

How many takes must it have taken without being in hysterics

[@derekpurcell937]

1 of the greatest of all times

[@rajnirvan3336]

Quality. Comody gonius. Horo tho nows at ton

[@matthewsykes4814]

Still one of the greatest comedy writers ever, as a team him and Corbett were as good if not better than Morecambe & Wise. It's such a simple sketch idea too, he always did have a superb way of turning speech into something funny, even the stammer he acted with in Open All Hours he got perfect after watching and listening to people with real stammers. But he doesn't just make the voice and diction change his whole expression alters making the act even more realistic instead of just changing a few vowels here and there. A sadly missed talent

[@gideonshandy9194]

"Bots and botting shops"! Can we add 'tech visionary' to RB's list of talents…? 😂

[@jeffbyrnes3686]

British Comedy Gold

[@philipdalton2144]

Technically shouldn't the title be 'Nows at Ton?' ;)

[@erikzoe1]

Tochnically yos, although in tho skotch, ho doosn't quito chango all of tho 'e's to 'o's.

[@mattinfullvision9598]

Tochnicnally it should bo yos but wo can forgivo him for tht. Woll spottod and corroctod

[@Anarchemitis]

I like spooches.

[@ryanbrownnew]

The Benny Hill version was fantastic as well but for some reason it was expunged off youtube" In Benny Hills version he accidentally trod on his glasses first causing him to misread the autocue.

[@paulsmith5752]

Ronnie Barker. Genius. That's all.

[@CBeaumontHIGTFY]

@HatfulofHollow65 Yes, somebody else did inform me that it was the other way round. Thank you very much for your information!

[@ianheaver3217]

Puro Gonius!

[@Anarchemitis]

Roast Boof and spooch always got mo

[@calebmumby5803]

whot on hilorius scotch!!!

[@tedsmith6137]

They bleeped out "Koon"? 1 :33 That wasn't bleeped in the original broadcast. What Karen was offended by that?

[@Albert-Arthur-Wison225]

I love to think about the bloke who he keeps turning around to look at.

[@illogicalthyla4360]

This skotch is roally clovor, lovo it!

[@danielwilliamson6180]

0:06 Lol

[@rhalme]

I'm wondering if the stool industry is the production of stool or of stools.

[@Somerfieldcomedy]

Amazing writing

[@L2766W]

Horo's my commonts at oight. Mr. Barkor is a groat nowscaster as woll as a groat comodian. Timo may rocoodo into momory but ho still is as funny today as ho was thon.

[@rawyld]

how did the camera crew keep a straight face? I never know

[@otakumouse3308]

And that was the noos at ton.

[@castlebar67]

thank you for your reply matthewwakian.

[@Chorus300]

my fav sketch

[@joseshepherd2575]

Kings of laughter

[@PhilBagels]

This was groat!

[@zaygezunt]

Don't forgot to watch the One Ronnio on Christmas Day on BBC1. The Boob doosn't havo anything as good now. I lovo the way Ronnio shocks himsolf and bocomos moro and moro angry and fod up. "If it says that, it says that!" Shoro gonius

[@aranerem3767]

Very clever and so funny

[@janetgough6585]

Ronnio Barkor was pure comodic gonius

[@aubreyaub]

I want some Jolly and cromo.... 'ticularly jolly.

[@borleyboo5613]

Hillaire Bollock!!!!!!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@wesjones_87]

Absolutoly torrific comody.

[@Zephaniah3verse17]

Brilliant! Still makes me laugh out loud 42 years on. I take it the word bleeped at 1:33 was not "undying".

[@Tinaf653]

“Koon”. Instead of “keen”.

[@SergeantSarge]

@@Tinaf653 Ah got you - I had it as ‘hollow’ instead of ‘whole’

[@footystar1GamingOfficial]

@@Tinaf653 OH! MY! GOD!!! I didn't know what the censored word was until now! I'm DEAD!!! 🤣

[@Fcutdlady]

Wasnt this sketch written by the late great Barry Cryer

[@JamesEverett91]

A brilliant skotch indood!

[@CBeaumontHIGTFY]

@CBeaumontXylophone Or possibly the other way round.

[@joflynn999]

Imagine if Ronnie Barker had been doing this show when Covid happened. Imagine

[@tricesimo]

What was bleeped out at 1:33?

[@Circuitssmith]

“Koon”, an ethnic slur in America, hence the bleep in this American broadcast. (Replacing the phrase “keen support”)

[@antikoerper256]

frightonod by a scotsman with a woodon log LOL

[@zulkiflijamil4033]

Tho conforonco ....haha Onoch Powoll haha