Things My Therapist Has Told Me That Has Changed My Life | Nikol Johnson

[@kimtaff1932]

I am a therapist so of course I appreciate beauty influencers bringing in mental health and well-being. There is nothing more that brings beauty into the world as a woman who loves and values herself.

[@teamginger6359]

❤❤❤

[@SR-mv2mf]

100% agree with you

[@GracetheWestie]

I started therapy during the break-up of my first marriage. I continued going for 2 years after the divorce. It taught me so much. My therapist was the absolute best. I know she really cared about me and wanted the very best for me. It helped guide me to the wonderful life i have now.

[@MultiArabian]

Therapy changed my life!! I think positive mental health is part of style and beauty!! It goes hand and hand. Thank you for having the courage to address mental health!! You are invaluable to me!! Thank you!!

[@winniefourre8301]

It certainly depends on the therapist. I have met and have had a few. Some just “read out of a text book” and gave cookie cutter remarks. Other really listened and treated all people as humans that were different and needed their own directions. JMO

[@meggarstang6761]

I was hospitalized decades ago with profound depression, weight down to 89 lbs. The most impactful statement my kind therapist said was this: You say you feel like you're confined to a prison cell, but here's something you should know. The door isn't locked. You can decide to get up and leave anytime you want. So I did just that - got up and left, and stepped into the world again. Just one statement. Therapy can be magic.

[@clairechloe5294]

👍👍👍👍👍 Well done.

[@eileengleeson7851]

Keep going and stay positive ❤😊😊

[@josettechrystall9290]

Wow so profound thank you

[@pricilalaignier6503]

Brave ❤❤❤

[@RosaneGibson]

Yes! Notice how we naturally paint pictures with words to express how we feel, like saying "I feel stabbed in the back" or "I've got the weight of the world on my shoulders." So, we can pay attention to these expressions, create our own symbolic image for the situation we are going through, and then give it a good, intentional look. Watch as that feeling slowly fades away, leaving you feeling a whole lot better

[@josettechrystall9290]

Thank you - I just turned 55 and my husband of 25years has just abandoned me. I watch your video’s and they have helped me get out of bed every day, get dressed, do my hair and put on some makeup so the person in the mirror looks ok. this video made me realize that I probably do need to make time to see a therapist. I can’t control what my husband is going through but I need to focus on me and the rest of my life.

[@cw5451]

I think therapy is fabulous. I think it saved my life. My favorite advice from a therapist was: “Don’t worry about tomorrow or next week or next month. Just focus on making it through today.”

[@sandramigacz1766]

I just lost my father. My mom died of Covid in 2019. The past 10 years of my life the care and support of my parents has been my main focus. Now that they are both gone, I’m lost. I am losing interest in so many things. This video has convinced me to go see a therapist for direction. Thank you for sharing and words of motivation.

[@lisas2538]

I can totally understand and relate. My dad died in 2020. I had taken care of him for 10 years.

[@tracyd2598]

What did you want to do as a teenager or child, that you never got to do? I took surfing lessons at 55.

[@sandramigacz1766]

@@tracyd2598 At 63, I just bought a pair of jet skies for my 12 year old grandson and I. They have proven to be a wonderful investment.

[@vickytsao6862]

Remember to Love yourself and take care of yourself

[@margaretk9351]

Good for you, Sandra. I'm proud of you! Sometimes life just lets us know we need to talk to someone and that's perfectly okay.

[@reneemeyer9107]

I'm sorry your IVF journey turned out as it did, but it's lovely to see that mom energy you have used to benefit your viewers through the nurturing health and wellness advice you're passionate about sharing. I see that a lot from women who weren't able to have children, for one reason or another, they often gift that life giving energy out to the world in other ways. It's beautiful, and much appreciated.

[@lisamcallister6534]

That's what we did...we gave to children not ours. Hundreds.

[@gloriasaliba3395]

Thank you for sharing these words they have resonated deeply within me x

[@reneemeyer9107]

@@gloriasaliba3395 you are welcome.

[@rubychurch3466]

Agree. Beautiful words. I’m also very sad that the ivf didn’t work for you.

[@MaryNelson-e4p]

Thank you!! I’m 70 and have gone to therapy since my divorce in 1985 off and on (mostly on) to help me cope with life and all the challenges. My faith, therapy, and self help books have helped me through so much even during a time that therapy was thought to be for the weak. Those that judge do not know how brave and strong you need to be to do it. I admire you even more for sharing this and saying “it’s okay”. You’re an amazing lady!💗

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you for sharing! xoxox

[@teamginger6359]

Agreed!

[@deezahm9143]

Good for you for sharing!!! Bless you! 💕

[@ryukoli4707]

I NEVER HAD SUPPORT! So I kept quiet about it for years. Then, one day, I DID NOT CARE ABOUT THE THOUGHTS OF OTHERS! I actually got others jazzed about them getting into therapy, too.

[@DanielDashnaw]

I'm a couples therapist, Nikol. I applaud your discussion of mental health. Mental health is beautiful!

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you Daniel

[@GracetheWestie]

I started therapy during the break-up of my first marriage. I continued going for 2 years after the divorce. It taught me so much. My therapist was the absolute best. I know she really cared about me and wanted the very best for me. It helped guide me to the wonderful life i have now.

[@amberfire2]

I'm 77 and I have PTSD and have had PTSD for 50 years when my physical body began to weaken I began to feel vulnerable and then flashbacks and nightmares began. I got help but I want women to be aware that it is not unusual for women in their 70's to suddenly have flashbacks return and there is help, just be conscious of what the problem is.

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you for sharing and helping my audience with this insight. xo

[@kathiebarton9098]

Amber I did not know how common it is for women their 70s to have a need for therapy. I am glad to know I am not an anomaly. At 71 I need someone to talk to about where I am now and how to embrace more joy. I am encouraged to move forward.

[@amberfire2]

@@kathiebarton9098 Kathie, whether we were in executive suites, assembly lines or at home raising our children, we had schedules to meet, people to deal with and places to go. It was like living on a conveyor belt and suddenly it stops and we are jolted into a new land and we don't know where we are or what we are suppose to do, it's a shock and to make matters worse our bodies are not working as well as before and society dismisses us as if our gray hair is a signal that we are now of no use. I hope you do find a therapist or a woman's group to talk things over with as it has been a great help to me. I wish I could give you my email address but everything is public. Good luck.

[@pegecrane5142]

So sweet of you to be transparent with us. 💞

[@mariaattanasio5558]

Thank you Nikol. I'm 64 and it took a divorce (after 39 years of marriage )to understand how bad we treat ourselves. We grew up listening " help others" and we don't know how to love ourselves. I was going through my pain when I hear "Sadhguru" : if a child hit you, you stop it. If an adult hit you, you defend yourself or run. But NOBODY can protect you when you hit yourself.

[@gloriasaliba3395]

So true often we are our own harvest critics

[@patriciakeegan4228]

My view on therapy is that your experience definitely revolves around finding the right therapist.❤

[@alexandra8683]

YES!!!💖

[@NikolJohnson]

Completely agree and it might not be your first or your fifth. You have to find someone that has the right energy for you.

[@jncoltin]

And, don’t be afraid to change therapists if one isn’t helping you.

[@amethystsamia]

I had to change therapists several times. I thought something was wrong with ME because I couldn’t find one that helped. The doc managing my therapy told me that a therapist is like an old shoe. When you find one that fits, you stick with it. Sometimes you have to change a lot of shoes until you find the one that just fits. I finally found one that fit me comfortably, and they left the practice and the area. Go figure. 🤣

[@aileenvaughan1588]

I’m 76 & have worked with therapists at various stage space in my life in my life and have found it helpful. Those professionals have been instrumental in helping me find my own answers to issues from my childhood and helped me find peace.

[@isabelmujica945]

Also, I am a 52 year old woman who NEVER EVER ever cared about makeup and things like this yet you make it so fun and interesting. I don't have the money for the products you suggest and I'll just make do with what I can find in my country's drugstore. ❤

[@mkbrown3902]

I found ELF and The Ordinary products are effective and inexpensive... good ingredients.

[@rrhines3151]

We can only do the best with what we have ❤ That’s being the “best version of ourselves!” Nikol has expressed that thought many times! Let’s celebrate 🎉that we are trying to do so! Blessings!

[@uddercharmsfarm8159]

I'm same age and haven't worn makeup in about a decade! I've learned how to do it much better thru Nikol and others and now put it on most everyday even tho I see nobody else but my family. I also got skin care products that are good ingredients - PURE. I started doing face yoga also and toning with a tuning fork and I can see a difference in just a month or so!!!

[@Hibernia2324]

Nikol inspired me to return to wearing makeup and dressing up more. I've been wearing jeans and T-shirts or a swearshirt since 2020. Nikol has the knack other influencers don't.

[@NikolJohnson]

Made my day 🥰@@Hibernia2324

[@leitanewman8991]

I was 40 when my son was born and 43 when my daughter was born. My husband and I were fortunate because we could conceive on our own, but we experienced several miscarriages. Looking back, I wish that I had gone to therapy to deal with the losses, fear, and anxiety. Thanks for this, lots of very good tips!❤

[@bcworth444]

Boy, you sure nailed it about the need to curate what you engage in, on social media. One concerning Y.T. video can start a buffet of bad news, and suddenly you find yourself overwhelmed and depressed. I had to draw a hard line this summer and avoid certain subjects. Life is too short. I appreciate your honesty; best wishes to you, Nikol

[@nikkil764]

My mom always said, “When in doubt, don’t.” So true. Most of my life mistakes occurred when I went ahead and did something I wasn’t sure about because someone else pressured me to act.

[@doctormimi9486]

Sooooo true

[@ryukoli4707]

Do NOT BE IMPULSIVE! Those behaviors and decisions are, usually, regrettable.

[@pianogirl9676]

Oh I soooooo relate! Not once did it turn out to be a good idea. NOT ONCE!

[@deezahm9143]

🌸Thank you, Nikol, and all the brave women here who share their experiences with mental health issues and the treatment available. I’m 67, went thru grey divorce at 62, and trying to learn to live alone after 35 years married. Then I got scammed out of my life savings, and have panic attacks periodically as a result of being afraid and alone. I can’t afford help from professionals, so your words of encouragement and strength from all of you . Thank you so much 🙏💕

[@Queen_pillowtop]

Why did you get divorced???

[@sandrapontius3500]

I am so sorry to hear you’ve encountered so much trouble. Losing one’s life savings after divorce is pain on top of pain - very hurtful. All the best to you.

[@launajorgensen7275]

Baby steps to reach out. There are many sources ; library, senior center, volunteering at food banks, groups for all kind of games. Take walks in public places, read a book on a park bench . Be around people and find out how amazing most regular people are.

[@alicepirola7077]

I am so sorry for you having to endure such trauma. Praying for better days ahead for you. 🙏

[@selectiveoutrage6617]

Check out the Lefkoe Institute and see if you can get free counseling by trainees in this very quick, effective technique. I wasted a fortune and a lot of time on other types of therapies that only gave temporary relief. The Lefkoe Method was a lifesaver. Life changing! Many conventional therapists have trained in this Method because what they had been doing didn't work.

[@LindaKing-lf8nk]

Just being so open and honest. And I admire your ability to connect with people and try to help them in every aspect of being beautiful inside and out.

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you

[@ebooboo6784]

After a lot of traumatic life experiences in my early 50's I spent 10 years in therapy. It changed my life.

[@NikolJohnson]

thank you for sharing! xoxoxo

[@dianebruno3811]

A healthy mind is the best beauty accessory. Inner peace shines through. ❤

[@TexasAlabama]

I'm a therapist, and I loved this video. 🙂 I became a therapist because therapy helped me so much! I actually love talking to women in menopause because it's such a strange time of our lives, with all of the weird physical stuff and then add on the emotional stuff!! For me it was dealing with secondary infertility, never being married, etc. I'm so glad I can be there for other women and give them a space to talk and feel comforted and heard!

[@connieinman2467]

I’m in menopause! Do you offer remote therapy?

[@HollyWeiss]

I receive an amazing amount of positivity from you, Nikol! Thank you

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you xoxo

[@kathytarver2133]

Until I had to take a Medical retirement, I was a Certified Psych, Alcohol, & Drug Counselor, and also an RN. I have seen a therapist and psychiatrist most of the last 39 years because of severe Depression and Anxiety. Gratitude lists are big for me! Thank you for bringing up this subject‼️ It’s so important!! 🌹❣️

[@susannjarvis5587]

We need to stop hiding our mental well-being issues. I applaud you for bringing up the situation and for discussing some of what you do to cope. For me, makeup is part of my therapy. Which makes your channel a regular place for me to spend time. Thank you.

[@YES-n6t]

As a life coach, I can't say enough about how important it is to pursue or maintain positive mental health and well-being. I especially like the 3rd piece of advice, "Get Out and Walk!" I take my practice outdoors and walk or hike with my clients during our sessions. I have found that simply getting out of the office and into a natural setting for a short time has tremendous benefits for physical, mental and emotional health and can lead to magnificent breakthroughs in both professional and personal arenas.

[@LieingCostsYourSoulTellElders]

Remember all your told lies. Also no more porn forever in the future men can't understand the vagina sight

[@echase416]

It’s no accident that the top trauma theorists (eg Dr Pat Ogden, etc) advocate movement- based therapies. Eg dance and yoga

[@amberwaters9529]

I hava motto I live by. "Don't react... RESPOND." It ties into what you were saying about taking time to process. I was very impulsive as a kid and young adult which did not serve me well. I usually sleep on things to let logic settle in. My life has been so much better since I've been following this advice.

[@LieingCostsYourSoulTellElders]

Remember all your told lies. Also no more porn forever in the future men can't understand the vagina sight

[@carolturner1976]

I have utilized therapy on and off throughout my life for childhood traumas, stressful times and dealing with work, relationships and just life. It is a benefit to understand yourself and other, and I believe that it is a game changer when you have a compatible therapist.

[@Cat-no8ts]

Agree!

[@susanblanche9684]

I use to be fearful of everything after my divorce of 25 years. Home torn down by a tornedo;. Son going off to war; starting a new job; panic attacks. I use to tell him my mind is always saying " what if this happens? What if that happens to my therapist!! He said " Just put the word " So" in front of " what if. " So what if!?". It helped ease the tension

[@carolmcduffie1990]

I get to choose the type of relationship I have with MYSELF. Am I kind? Am I forgetting? Am I supportive? Thank you for sharing this Nikol! Love you taking on the tough topics.

[@NikolJohnson]

Yes this is the best relationship to get right! xoxoxox

[@littlejademoon]

Thanks for that mindset... choosing the type of relationship I want with myself is genius.

[@helenwalker716]

Thank you Nikol for making my day brighter. You are an amazing human being.

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you

[@denisenurse1960]

I LOVED THIS!!!! This was definitely an answer to my prayers! I’m having such a difficult time in my life at 63 with taking care of my mom and getting no support from my sisters who are angry with me that I moved in with mom to take care of her after my dad passed. ☹️♥️

[@robertahernandez5607]

I am a caregiver, and taking care of family or just someone who is ill has an amazing heart. You have a beautiful heart. God wants us to take care of our parents.

[@portalsandpathways]

Thank you for starting this discussion here. I’ve been in therapy, off and on, for almost 50 years. It’s a tool in my toolbox. In my early 40’s I experienced the trauma of my husband and my only brother almost dying on the same day. I called my therapist, who I hadn’t spoken with in a couple of years, and cried out my story to her from the hospital surgery waiting room. At one point in the conversation she said “but nobody died, right?” and we both started laughing. It’s become my mantra for when things start going wrong. My husband and I say it to each other to regain perspective when times get tough.

[@carlacaldwell1719]

DEAR NIKOL, Thank you for bringing this up. I am a nurse in NZ. I still amazes me what a stigma Mental Health has. I remind people that their brain is just another origin of their body that at some level if working 24 hours a day. Like a heart, for example. If you were told by a cardiologist that you had a heart attack, you wouldn’t think twice about following the rules, going to cardiac rehab, taking the medications if they’re required. However when it comes to your brain not being able to cope with chemical imbalances or tragedies or life changes, for some reason it becomes a really big deal (sometimes more to others’ than ourselves) that we choose to. Take the meds and do the rehab. If we were to break a leg, it would go in a cast for 6-8 weeks and we would uses crutches when we walk to take the pressure off and we would put it up on a pillow when it call got too much and take the medications when we had pain. How sad we give a leg so much more love than we do our brains. We cant power them down or we would die but we can give it all the love we do our face or bodies. And, as a group we can talk more about it, in perspective; as another very important part, very normal part of our health. Carla.

[@melstjohn3766]

I love positivity .Thank you NIkol One thing I practise every day is gratitude ,when you have gratitude it lifts you .Personally I do no social media .Walking several hours a day with my dogs is great therapy too.

[@sandypolsky5683]

I worked in mental health for almost 40 years. Mental health is as important as your physical health. As you would go to your primary medical provider, as well is a therapist, counselor, psychiatrist, etc., for your mental health needs when necessary. Such a huge strength to do so, but so life changing.

[@bingersinger1517]

But it is Not covered by my insurance. 😢😢 so I can’t afford to get help.

[@sandypolsky5683]

@@bingersinger1517 There are several agencies such as Catholic Charities (you do not have to be Catholic) that charge by your income. I would definitely check around. I used a couple of different agencies when I was a single Mom and also for my son when we needed therapy and believe me, I didn't have the money either.

[@carolesimmons1]

Excellent video! Great points. Have to say the last one takes really hard work. I was the only child of a severely alcoholic mother- no siblings, no father just her and a terrified little girl and teenager. She was committed to the State mental hospital for awhile and after she got out committed suicide. My first husband was an alcoholic (I don’t drink) and he committed suicide a few years after our divorce. I have been diagnosed with Complex PTSD but have a wonderful therapist who utilizes many valuable techniques like EMDR. Maybe at 73 a bit late to start working on this but I taught high school and college for 47 years and that saved my life. Now without that defense I need to work on these things. Thank you for this video!!

[@kellyw6652]

Oh boy, I went through the IVF journey for 7 yrs… you are 100% right, mental health support sure would have helped! It’s a tuff road that very few people can understand. I got luck, a year after giving up I got pregnant and had my daughter. I often wonder how much of the stress I put on myself, outside of the physical stuff slowed this process. Thanks for this video❤

[@AliseL22]

Your No.1 point is literally on point. As I age, I find stepping back and not instantly reacting/responding has helped calm my mind so much. Digest/ponder/take a walk/sleep on it - then respond or not, how you see fit. You have such a nice community on your channel and always appreciate the the time you give us as well as the comments/thoughtful advice from others here.

[@Cat-no8ts]

I think therapy is a must, esp for the times we're living in. We're living in an era where adults are struggling to make ends meet, not only in their wallets, but in their minds! The struggles are real, and we don't always have control over how things turn out; but maintaining our boundaries, balancing our relationship with ourselves is essential and sometimes we need help, but we also have to realize that, no matter how hard we try, we can't be perfect, nor should we try to be. I'll always remember this: perfection is the enemy of what's possible! Great topic, Nikol - gets my blood pumping!😂❤

[@NikolJohnson]

Love you ladies sharing so insightful ❤️

[@toocooltobeold]

I have been going to therapy for years. I think its great for everyone. We are all crazy some of us just have better coping skills!

[@lindamarocco4583]

My 2 daughters-in-law had IVF multiple times!..never once recommended therapy to them…one of my DILs’ and son had lost their first son at 22 months old, NEVER therapy suggested!!!…I feel you, Nikol!!!!..the medical community needs to get their shit together in many, many, many ways!…most people don’t really WANT to understand, unless it has happened to them!…just my opinion!!!..great video!!!….I broke my pubic Ramos bone in April, never was told how it could change your life for a time!!!…the world is a very non caring society, more and more!…very sad!..this is a fantastic video!!!!..thank you so much!!!!💜👏

[@launajorgensen7275]

Therapy is an asset to our culture. It’s time for mental health not to be a stigma issue. I like the affirmations you used. They reflect much of what we learn in the AA, Al-Anon, Adult Child of Alcoholics, NA etc programs. There is no need for feeling shame when asking for help.

[@katrinaperez5254]

I had the gastric sleeve surgery six months ago and the doctors group I went with made us do 6 months of diet and nutrition, a psychological evaluation. I also decided to see a therapist to deal with body dysmorphia and other things going on. When ever we are going through anything; depression, anxiety, surgery, cancer we need to treat our mind body and soul! Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your content and your honesty! ❤😊

[@ryukoli4707]

It's a safe place to let go!!!! Dump sessions...... bringing calmness and relief. Quite energizing!

[@PeaceIsYeshua]

I find these kinds of things so interesting! Thanks, Nikol! 💕 6:34 #1 _When you don’t know what to do, do nothing._ (Don’t always respond right away. Take a moment to process). 7:06 #2 _You get to choose the type of relationship you have with…_ (You have the power to direct your relationships). 7:41 #3 _Get out and walk._ (This allows you to process things, get new ideas, etc). 8:54 #4 _And what was the crime?_ (We’re often too hard on ourselves! Was what we said/did a catastrophe? No? Then let it go). 9:45 #5 _I’m just too tired._ (Often times, we’re actually not too tired-just do it. My note: For those with chronic health issues, sometimes rest really is needed!). 10:39 #6 _Don’t get on the rollercoaster but always be waiting for them on the platform._ 11:49 #7 _Okay, but at what cost to you?_ 12:46 #8 _Not my circus, not my monkeys._ 13:59 #9 _When you have a book, you’ll never be lonely._ 14:36 #10 _Aren’t you curious about what is around the corner for you?_ 16:28 #11 _We all had something from our childhood that we had zero control over._ (We cannot control others, but we can control our reactions).

[@juliepeck3523]

My body is going through major medical issues that has put the breaks on my life. As a 48 year old relatively healthy person prior to this I wasn’t mentally prepared for these events. It took me two years to realize I had to get my mental health well to help me navigate these issues. I was so busy jumping hurdles I didn’t even consider what was going on in my soul. Thank God for a great councilor and tools to help navigate health issues. Amazing advice from a beautiful KZbinr.

[@janrichmond9784]

Golly Nikol…I have had a wonderful empathetic brilliant tough PhD therapist since my divorce in 1986. I love her and she has walked by my side through good and not so good for all these years. In my humble opinion, everyone should find a therapist who doesn’t just rubber stamp behaviors but who understands them and understands how to navigate life’s inevitable situations. Good solid rational thinking Nikol and sharing your journey and solutions really helps others.

[@euniceh9851]

I have a therapist - a psychologist only 5 minutes away whom I see regularly. It was one of the first things I organized when I moved to the country. You have given me great food for thought. Thankyou Nikol.

[@cammiemr5172]

I did go through the infertility journey yrs ago, and it is SO much harder than most realize. Sending you big hugs. Thank you for how you always want to help others. 💗

[@harrietlovejoy3424]

I think therapy is such a positive thing. I admire your channel, knowledge, makeup, and message. Keep up the inspiring message!

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you

[@deedee8053]

I’m so sorry you went through such an awful experience with IVF…. I personally went through artificial insemination….such a horrible roller coaster…I decided… 3 tries then that is it! It was just too hard emotionally! On the 3rd & my last try… I ended up with triplets….meanwhile I’m 5’2” 100 lbs…No way was my body going to carry 3…. I ended up with pre-eclampsia…my body was shutting down. Ended up with an emergency C-section at 27 weeks…..needs less to say 2 were lost after 4 days of life in the NICU. My son who was 1lb. 2oz. Was in the NICU for 4 months on oxygen for over 1 year…. He is now a healthy 30 year old. Thank God 🙏🏼 I just love & admire all you are and do! I especially love your shorts in that beautiful closet of yours dancing looking beautiful..🥰❤️👍🏼👍🏼 God needed you on a different path…you are helping us women learn how to be strong and confident within our own skin. Thank you & God bless you. You rock!

[@joymoody2372]

Nikol, It was so refreshing to hear you break into this topic. How often we deny or avoid the fact that mind & body work together. We do need to tend to both. I am a retired clinical mental health counselor & art therapist.

[@rrhines3151]

Bless you for all you offered your clients/patients! With “chemo brain,” I couldn’t find the words… Maybe art therapy would have helped but neuropathy in hands & feet offers another set of challenges! While I am stable and doing well now, I have the coveted “5 yr mark” to reach. While stats are low, some women had to beat them to make the most recent medical study “significant!” My point of writing you was, art & music therapy is sometimes underrated! Both can make SUCH a difference! Thank you again ❤ for choosing such a specialty that offers an ability to communicate when words aren’t available (yet!) 😊🎨

[@joymoody2372]

@rrhines3151 Strength & healing on your journey. I do believe anyone with a physical challenge can benefit from therapy, as can the family, loved ones & friends.. everyone becomes emotionally impacted by the treatment/healing process. As for Art Therapy, it is very powerful and can be far less anxiety producing than talk therapy. It does NOT require artistic skills, just a willingness to experiment & express through various media & means.

[@BumbleBee666-u5t]

I love that “when you don’t know what to do, do nothing”. So good!

[@Lina-co5up]

Thank you for your video. I just went through IVF, and it didn't work for us, and I have been crying a river, so it's really nice to hear positive things.

[@catzlady.8189]

Nikol. You are my therapist. You have helped me pull out of a very difficult 12 months. Watching you overcome your obstacles and still get up every day and share with us your beauty and fashion tips is encouraging to me. Dancing and smiling and projecting positivity. It’s everything to me. So thanks. I’m coming out on the other side and finding myself again. ❤.

[@bingersinger1517]

8 years of infertility treatments and not 1 resource when I asked. My dr was clearly uncomfortable as I fell apart, asking for help. Nice guy but clueless! Such an Important topic ! Thanks,Nicole…body, mind roller coaster for sure..monthly grieving

[@bettyestremera129]

Hi. I watch you all time but seldom comment. Thanks for expanding beauty to include our mental health. Truly nothing is more important. We can dress up, make up but if we are not honoring self, knowing self, at least liking self then the outer self has no where to go. All dressed up and no where to go!!!

[@dianemacdougall319]

I am a therapist and I appreciated hearing your list -it was great and I love how proactive you are about taking control of your own thought life!! You are a great role model in this!! Thank you Your hair looks so pretty, too!

[@YardleySlicker]

Bravo Nikol! I think we’ve all seen people who have put so much effort to dress up their exterior appearance, but this will not hide underlying sadness or unease within one’s own heart and mind. This may be the most necessary of all your videos - a relieved mind and soul transmits the beauty within. Ladies, know thyself and take care of thyself.❤

[@SharonNixon-p4x]

I took a class at work called "Emotional Intelligence". Stop, process, react or not. Great class!!

[@susanrscott7910]

As a therapist I appreciate your emphasis on constructive thinking, believing in one’s abilities to manage life and the important of using therapy to navigate our challenging world. Thanks for sharing this. Good to be reminded how simple comments can carry so much empowerment. 😊

[@andreajones2555]

I believe therapy is vitally important in this day and age. I’m so glad that you brought this up on your platform. Continue your amazing work beautiful lady 🌷🌷🌸

[@marilynpatternac3572]

I really enjoyed this video Nikol.. I retired 2 years ago. I’m 77 now and I always feel that I should be doing this and doing that and feel guilty when I don’t do certain things around my home. My husband keeps telling me to relax, read your book and take it easy. But I always feel guilty. Your video was eye opening for me! Loved it!❤

[@jeanetteh.9240]

Consider where you got the message that you are only worthwhile if you are being "productive." It isn't true . . .

[@margaretdillinger5090]

I’m so sorry what you had to deal with. My body doesn’t work the way I wish it would. Mental abuse and sexual abuse has left such a mark on me but I’m dealing with digging out of that mindset. I’ve done therapy and I believe it can help. I also believe in God and rely on His help. Sometimes the mental part is more important than the beauty part because when we conquer the mental the beauty will follow. I’m going tomorrow to find out the results of the latest test to see what else medically wrong in this old body(72). Growing old can be rough but then I think of a sister that passed away at 64 from cancer, she didn’t get watch her grandsons grow up. God bless you and keep you.

[@nschoess]

I recall being in a bad relationship, talking about how awful this other person was being when my therapist put the question to me: “Why did you choose him?” That flipped my entire perspective. P.S. Love your channel, Nikol!

[@InsideouttrainingWB]

I have been an EFT Practitioner/personal trainer/wellness coach for 25 years. It’s amazing to people don’t focus on the emotional piece first before any change in their lives. I have had women who by all standards are at 10 and yet they hate the way they look so their weight yo-yos up and down. When we focus on what’s between our ears first everything else follow suit and is consistent. Thank you so much for reiterating this. Love your channel!

[@skippyalbrite2431]

I appreciate your approaching this topic.Mental health is a part of beauty because when your mind is unsettled it certainly can affect your looks!A pair of crazed looking eyes aren't a thing of beauty!Therapy did not work for me,at all.If you are chemically sensitive&cannot take the drugs they insist will improve your condition,they do not know what to do with or for you! Tried it for ten long years with more than one therapist. Not one single behavior modification skill was ever mentioned.My sister showed me the calming breathing exercises her therapist taught her!So decided to quit the therapy,took myself off the drugs&am far better off without them&the labels too.I'm copying your ten points into my journal for future reference.Thank you for the excellent advice!♡♡♡

[@TheJuday66]

Thank God for my patient supportive therapist! She guided me out of a terrible situation I agreed my way into… I thought it an impossible task. Bravo!!!

[@jodybode7284]

It’s been so important to me that I continue to grow. That I continue to change for the better. Self help books, therapists, life coach, you choose. Continue to grow and mature in all areas of your life. It makes life worth living to me. Love you, Nikol! Thanks for being you, Jody Bode

[@wolfmangaming3066]

Since COVID and since I am been more aware of mental health, I think it is truly needed. I pray we drop the stigma behind seeking help.

[@yvettemoreel4237]

I agree with you. It's good to talk to a therapist with things that you have been struggling with in life. I do self positive talk I don't know I journal I take those walks and I meditate. This is all very good for self-healing self-awareness and a better life.❤

[@rasberryfields2132]

Thank you for sharing this with us. I am 68 and for the first time in my life I am not constantly trying to be skinny! My body looks like a tall preteen boy. That said, I have never learned to love myself. I was considering therapy...so happy to see that it is helpful.❤

[@rabaile1]

I SO agree with your statement about people FILMING and not HELPING. Unbelievably, I have NEVER heard anybody else make mention of that, and yet it's the first thing I think of when I see all of this filming of tragedies or near tragedies on social media.

[@suecone2198]

It was really hard for me to say NO as I was a people pleaser. It was amazing to me that i didn’t need to give a reason and someone else would always do the job. It was a real life lesson. ❤

[@Suz52]

Therapy is very important! I’ve never met anyone who wouldn’t benefit from it. My heart goes out to you for your experience. My first child, whom I tried to conceive for 5 years, died in my arms at 3 days of age.💔 She had an unknown heart defect and could not survive. I later participated in, later co-facilitated, served on the board and finally was co-chair of a support group. It was for parents who experienced miscarriage, stillbirth & neonatal deaths. I could not have survived without that support of others who understood my experience. Your advice is spot on!! You go girl.

[@makloch]

I’m so with you on boundaries with social media, in fact, I don’t much care for it. I prefer quiet, nature, meditation, beautiful music, and positive people! These things nourish me!

[@pamelatrosino3037]

Nikol, thank you for a wonderful session with you this morning. I feel invigorated from your words, reminded why we moved from NJ to NC and thankful for my mind now having more quiet & peace. A left the world of Yes - closed out- sold are home and property and joined our daughter. It is so wonderful to be close to our one & only blessing, the best thing to happen to us! I am 70 years and faithful to your site, love the beauty & fashion having come from that part if the world. For you I am ever grateful.

[@chereeburtner4659]

This video is well done Nicol. I'm 68 and limit time on all social media and haven't watched TV in 3 yrs. I feel less anxious and fulfilled finding natural balance in life. Thank you for your tips. ❤

[@anastasiarobinson6052]

Ones mental attitude is most important to your whole life system, which affects your happiness,your joy, and your personality. I find that when life gets me down I have my God to help me focus on being positive with hope and faith verbalized my concern and turning them over to Him for His attention. He always comes through for me to lift my mood and my challenging issues. Blessings

[@sandraharkins5113]

I have had therapy during certain stressful times in my life and it has worked for me. To me, therapy is a sign of strength you want to get thru certain difficulties. Speaking to a therapist that is objective and not involved in ones life (a relative, friend or neighbor) can be a really positive influence and help you to see different perspectives, just find the right one for yourself. Thank you for your videos, Nikol.

[@rrhines3151]

Reading the title of your post today prompted this immediate thought: “Oh, we’re talking about Wellness today!” I loved this conversation! I have had good therapists and others who were not the best fit… I had surgery for one reason but the diagnosis morphed into Stage 3 cancer 😮 As I deteriorated from chemo (I am in a good stage of recovery ❤️‍🩹 now) my health care was transferred out-of-state because I could no longer care for myself alone (during covid)… Fast forward 6 months later, after radiation, and trying to re-enter my life, I was not the same woman who began my journey. My oncologist determined I had PTSD and (again) I found myself in therapy. I grew weary of focusing on the pain & anger so chose another mindset. Each of us as women may face a different crisis… support from family & friends may not be enough. Therapy may help❤ Thank you, Nikol, for bringing up this important topic! 🙏🏻

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you for sharing your story and I am so happy you are on the road to recovery! xoxoxo

[@RosaneGibson]

I love this topic! In regard to mental health there are different modalities -therapy, life coaching, counseling, mentoring. It's like a buffet, and you get to pick what suits you. It's important to understand how they distinguish from each other. Therapy is ideal for addressing mental disorders like depression and anxiety, tackling deep-rooted fears. On the flip side, life coaching is for those eager to forge a brighter future and take proactive steps. Counselors and mentors offer guidance based on personal experiences, providing a roadmap for your journey. Connecting with a practitioner you resonate with is key; it adds a vital layer to the transformative process..Thank you for tapping into "inner beauty" Nikol!! You rock✨

[@randisweet]

When I retired, I gave myself a few years in which I said no to added commitments. I used to say yes a lot. Now, I am very intentional about the yeses I give so that I have a few and that I can do them justice. Appreciate all the guiding advice. Look forward to viewing again. ❤

[@kimberleyhurlburt7576]

Nikol I went through 5 years of infertility. I have a 26 year old daughter from it finally working. Going through infertility plays with a womb on every level and people say the stupidest things to you. On a lighter note I told my husband’s aunt I was failing at what two teenagers could accomplish in the back seat of a car. Without missing a beat she asked if we had tried getting in the back seat of a car. 😂. You have handled everything beautifully.

[@NathaHarleyGaga]

Therapy is wonderful for us willing to have an open mind about it and take the first steps to get there. I have had a lot of it and it’s life changing for sure. 🤗🙏💜❤️

[@lindacgrace2973]

I lost my husband of 37 years. I would NEVER have made it without my amazing therapist, Kesta. God bless those who can take the heat and still guide and protect and uplift. Therapy is a gift from God.

[@shellyturner2766]

I benefited from therapy at a key time. At the agency where I worked as a manager, i recommended counseling via the employee assistance program to my staff. Of course any counseling was confidential, but several team members over the years let me know they had gone and found it helpful. I have not experienced IVF, but some of my cutest grandchildren are here because of it... can't imagine our lives without them! 😊

[@brendafarley9004]

So much of this I noticed came with maturity and time for me. I realize not for everyone so it was good the way you broke each advice down. Number 4 I just experienced this weekend and I let it go quicker than I’ve ever done before. There was no catastrophe so I quickly let it go before it infested my mood.

[@SharonZortman-bu3vb]

I have never gone to a therapist but feel it would have helped me earlier in my life. I am 74 now. Al of your points mentioned are things that I have been learning to be so true in my life in a process of talking with other women and just listening to their experiences and connecting some of my situations with theirs. Great video and so very helpful. Appreciate you so much.

[@adriennegarvey4518]

I am always grateful for at least 3 things every day. I always thank God that I woke up this morning.

[@heathergustafson4237]

I also think that pausing helps to remind myself, You never know what is going on in someone’s life.

[@susannacohen5239]

My best advice from a friend… know when to just shut up. Sometimes we talk ourselves into the ditch. Great advice Nikol. ❤

[@alexisthompsonbursell8788]

Can’t thank you enough for these insightful and doable mental health helps!

[@cindihunter9119]

Nikol, Your channel is BRILLANT! I love the REAL topics you address here, and mental health is at the top of my list! I also adore your authenticity! You're advice is so helpful, and if I don't succeed you've been their encouraging me on! In gratidute... ❤️🎻😎

[@mkbrown3902]

I'm shocked IVF clinics do not offer mental health services. WOW!

[@rrhines3151]

I too was shocked 😳 Huge life experience but Nikol knew to seek out help for herself & spouse! What a positive example for women, isn’t she?! ❤

[@NikolJohnson]

It could be different now this was 2015-2018 hopefully, they will put as much stress and importance on Mental Health as they do all their expensive treatments NOT covered by insurance.

[@HCUncategorized]

Same. I did not go to IVF clinic but had my own TTC journey with multiple miscarriages and an appointment for HSG test....of all the situations that counseling could be pivotal, hard to believe it's not to be found in the TTC medical protocol. Best to all on the journey xo

[@RosaneGibson]

I believe you have a big mission here on this planet Nikol and we are all your children, being guided in the world of beauty and grace. Thank you.

[@Erika-Coach]

This video was so good, I watched it twice. People are judgmental when you mention “seeing a shrink”. Problem is though, is finding one that’s the “right fit”. One that does listen, answers questions, explains things. I got that “aha” moment late 90’s/early 2000. Things, troubles, losses, trying to be strong with 5 children & husband who lost quite a few jobs…being out of work for like a year to 18 months. Love your suggestions of taking a walk (had 2 large German Shepherds). Make! Yourself first. I just didn’t know how. Because? I was always, always the Caregiver. For family, for neighbors. I just don’t know HOW to be my own caregiver. Put myself first. Thanks Nicole. ❤c❤️o

[@Sunny-be1wg]

This topic is why you are my favorite person on You Tube. I enjoy your beauty advice but we can never be at our most radiant until we are well and in control emotionally. I agree with you about getting too involved on social media. The sad stories and situations were getting to me and leading to an overall sadness; therefore, I had to put on the brakes, so to speak. That’s all far too many do online is to repeat horridly sad stories and/ or news. It’s difficult to face that all we can actually do is read it and sympathize. But at what cost to our emotional state? I no longer read or repost those things. I changed my goal to that of uplifting others with positive or faith-based posts. I spend very little time online now. Now with AI I avoid the many false headlines and photos. Shame on those who post the come-ins for clicks. Thanks for your insight and wisdom my dear. This crucial topic needed to be addressed with your tact and sensitivity. Thank You

[@lisahilton8842]

As a mental health therapist I genuinely appreciate your comments on the importance of mental health; specifically when going through a physical/medical journey. Thank you for always keeping it real!

[@antirrhinum130]

Thanks for sharing. I think many of us need someone objective to listen to us. It's still difficult though in a work environment to take time off for appointments as there is still some stigma attached to needing mental health counselling.

[@nasuswolne5374]

Huge kudos to you Nikol. Absolutely YES therapy is quite enlightening. I am often surprised that such simple questions or thoughts posed by a therapist can cause an epiphany. Why didnt I think of that? Truly objectivity by the therapist is the magic. Our own emotions really muddle things. Thank you so very much for being a woman of substance and encouraging women, especially we older ladies, that we still have value and beauty. That beauty is not just physical. Thank you for encouraging us to care for our bodies with health being front and center. Initially I came to your channel for help with make up for an up coming wedding I was to attend. Your tips were very helpful. But to see your post today is just icing on the cake. Thank you so much for your passionate commitment to share with and help “the gray ladies”.

[@NikolJohnson]

Thank you I hope you have an amazing time at the wedding and of course, you will look AMAZING with all my techniques you are going to apply to your makeup! xoxox