No.1 Habit & Procrastination Expert: We've Got ADHD Wrong! Break Any Habit & Never Be Distracted!

In this new episode Steven sits down with the American behavioural design expert, Nir Eyal.
Topics:
00:00 Intro
02:02 Being indistractable
10:21 4 steps to avoid distractions
17:37 10-minute rule to beat procrastination
27:40 Prevent distraction & improve sex life
34:56 How to become disciplined & have strong willpower
47:33 The power of time allocation
53:33 Stop burnout
01:00:27 Stop blaming social media
01:10:17 Overcoming our traumas and improving confidence
01:20:39 Why is there a rise in ADHD?
01:37:31 Last guest’s question
Follow Nir:
Twitter: bit.ly/3BJR9uv
Instagram: bit.ly/43dDHuL
You can purchase Nir’s books here:
Indistractable: bit.ly/3pSfiwi
Hook: bit.ly/42WDgW0
Join this channel to get access to perks:
bit.ly/3Dpmgx5
Follow me:
Instagram: bit.ly/3nIkGAZ
Twitter: bit.ly/3ztHuHm
Linkedin: bit.ly/41Fl95Q
Telegram: bit.ly/3nJYxST
Sponsors:
Huel: g2ul0.app.link/G4RjcdKNKsb
Bluejeans: g2ul0.app.link/NCgpGjVNKsb
Zoe: joinzoe.com with an exclusive code CEO10 for 10% off

[@sigma4309]

"All human behaviour is driven by desire to escape discomfort" That hit deep

[@twilit]

that’s bullshit.

[@kwimms]

No it's not. Nice lie... maybe think about it a bit... so deep, you'll scrape you nose if you dive into it...

[@janetwhite7786]

As a recovering alcoholic/drug addict, i do know that every drink or drug i took was to keep from feeling my feelings (which were predominately uncomfortable).

[@catatonicable]

Or reaching Vicarus..

[@positivefraud3012]

@@twilityou proved his point, watching youtube to escape your discomfort

[@aj5690]

I have quite severe ADHD with really poor, almost non existent executive function. I can not just organise my way out of it, believe me I have tried, and it does help, but there is a physical difference with my brain that is going to be there regardless of my daily routine. In conclusion I do think the advice given can be helpful but marketing it as a cure or alternative to treatment can be quite reckless without knowing peoples individual cases.

[@BruhItsKayluh]

I agree 100%. It’s not that simple, and for adhd there is a spectrum of severity. My ADHD is also severe, I’ve tried many many things over the years to help me be successful. But sometimes it’s physically hard for me to even start things. Small things like my morning routine need immense effort. Its not like it’ll naturally make my executive function, emotional regulation, distractibility, scattered brain, impulsivity, forgetfulness and racing thoughts 24/7 better or cured. Sure, like I said you can do things to help, but it’ll never be a cure to help with all these many symptoms that come with ADHD. It’s just not that simple! It’s a very complex disorder and it’s a disorder that people have ALWAYS never understood and dismissed because you can’t see it. We look like everyone else but inside, we can be drowning if not managed. Our brains don’t produce enough Dopamine and are constantly seeking things to give us that. Low dopamine contributes to feeling unmotivated, sleepy, memory loss, sad, mood swings and affects our concentration. It’s not just the disorder where we get distracted, it’s much bigger than that.

[@itsmydamnation6158]

yeah he also is a bit dishonest around dopamine in the brain, sure there might be the same amount produced but there are many studies on the different causes of adhd ( defective DRD2 gene for example ) and its effects on dopamine and the brain. I dont have ADHD but my two daughters and their mother do , it was a pretty hard rolleyes in that section to me . That said i dont live in the US of A.....

[@tarcanplaka6721]

I am glad the comment section has some sense going on in it. I look at my ADHD as both a struggle and a super power. I just can’t always harness it at will. I really dislike the direction of the conversation in that section of this particular conversation. They are looking at only one side of the coin of ADHD. They are only looking at the “attention/ distractibility” part of the condition. There are other parts of ADHD that I actually struggle with more.

[@paulaogawa]

how do you handle things that you are passionate about? are you hyperfocussing?

[@josephpackcom]

@@itsmydamnation6158 I've been writing about ADHD for a couple of years now and I have never found a study that proves ADHD is caused by a lack of dopamine that wasn't funded by Big Pharma, or lacked the statistical significance required for a study of this kind. The point is this, if ADHD is caused by a lack of dopamine in the brain we haven't (yet) proven it. That doesn't mean it's not the cause, but it's looking increasingly less likely as time goes on.

[@TheRomanoffsCosplay]

I'm going to sound a little bit rude, but I think he is the one that got ADHD wrong. ADHD is definitely not just about distraction (although it is part of it). Our inability to memorize names of people we deal everyday is not because we are trying to escape reality, nor the amount of accidents we have happen because we are trying to escape our reality. I was only diagnosed at 40 years old but I was 3 years old the 1st time I got stitches.... I have more than 50 now! At 3 years old I'm not trying to escape reality, like my 10 year old daughter wasn't trying to escape reality when she was playing and her head bumped into the wall so hard that people 1 floor bellow listen to it. It also doesn't explain our object permeance issue (away from sight away from mind), or does explain the hereditary part . It is because of people like him that people like me and my daughter have trouble being diagnosed. We need to stop seeing ADHD as a behaviour problem... It's not, it's way more and affects things like heat and cold perception, object location perception, memory, notion of time, and energy. A lot of us have sensory issues and emotional issues that are really similar to autism.... Do you also think Autism happens because the person wants to escape reality? Absurd isn't it? But here we are, still not being able to understand that there is a physical thing behind ADHD, and not even medication is going to change that.

[@SparksnFlash]

I don't think your comment was rude. As someone Dx with ADHD at 45yo (currently 64), there is a lot of misunderstanding about the condition and, indeed he got a good portion of things wrong. 1. ADHD can be detected on A SERIES of brain scans. The scans are rarely done because they're very expensive and insurances won't pay for them. 2. Minus physical intervention to the brain, ADHD is not curable. (Anybody up for some brain surgery or electroshock therapy? Not me!) 3. Your post is right about the many other comorbidities that are part of having ADHD. 4. While some people with ADHD make it their "identity," there are far more of us that refuse or fight hard against making it our identity. Some things he did get right. ADHD (IMO) is overdiagnosed, especially in children and in the US. (I am a US citizen.) Sadly, it's also under diagnosed in women. ADHD symptoms can be reduced by making adaptations. Some of the un-destraction techniques he's recommended I used while he was a pup and continue to use today. e.g. using a note pad or sticky to write things down when, at the most inopportune times, things pop into my head. Often, I've pretended to be someone else just to get something done or in social settings, always before public speaking. Convincing myself that a deadline is actually a week before it is, and a lot more. IMO this young person might want to consider getting actual knowledge of the condition before making broad statements that have likely been gleaned from social and "news" media. My best to you and your daughter. 😊

[@Ndogg012]

There is no ADHD in Amish communities. It's absolutely a dopamine toxicity thing which leads to low attention span and poor memory.

[@SparksnFlash]

@@Ndogg012 First, to date, there is no empirical, scientific, or medical evidence that ADHD is caused by brain or "dopamine toxicity." It is inherited. Secondary ADHD is caused by traumatic brain injury. There may be ADHD in the Amish community, but as the lifestyle would dissuade diagnosis, who knows. It's probably more likely that no one has inherited the condition because there's no one to inherit it from within the limited genetic pool of the Amish community.

[@mariee.5912]

​@Ndogg012 you mean nobody diagnosed. Also it's possible sonce it's highly generic related.

[@weaviejeebies]

I'm going to go a good bit ruder than you and say that the intro was so full of unmitigated bullshit with zero actual research pertaining to people with adhd behind it. I'm 49, diagnosed at 25, was the first female my psychiatrist ever diagnosed or treated. I've watched the world's understanding of what people like me go through evolve over two decades to resemble something a bit more empathic and accommodating , but every now and then I see more of this kind of clueless take on it. It's not a choice to have an impaired working memory. It's not lack of discipline. It's a neurodevelopmental condition, and less than 30 seconds in I realized this guy doesn't know jack about it. I googled him and he has an MBA degree. Not medicine, not neuroscience, business. I applaud his obvious writing success and business acumen; his tips on focus and productivity may be awesome for neurotypicals, but in the hallowed name of Robin Williams, when it comes to a complex medically proven disorder like ADHD, I wish people would stay the hell in their lane and let doctors talk.

[@BigLittlePrayers]

Perfect definition of burn out. It explains the problem we are experiencing as teachers. We have highest expectations from so many outside entities ( government, administration, parents) many of which have no experience as teachers. They pile on and on and on. We no longer have agency or autonomy to do the job well. No one listens to the teachers say “this isn’t working”, “I don’t control that”, “I need control of this for students to progress”, “I don’t have resources for that” and more. We are told make it happen no matter what obstacles we put in your way. We get blamed by all entities when they think we are failing.

[@lizvantonder5502]

Absolutely agree

[@Si_in_the_Sky]

Please get Russell A Barkley (PHD) on the show - I’m fed up hearing nonsense from people who have assumed they know what it is- it’s a physical disability (albeit in the brain but visible via scanning) with cognitive symptoms. Some of us try so hard to get through every day and then hear an opinion that hits like telling a deaf person they’re not trying hard enough to hear. Brutal.

[@NicolaMulholland]

+1

[@neuroticnation144]

Excellent example!

[@mel-melschell6562]

So true!

[@TomBeardshaw]

Yes, yes, yes. Russell Barkley really needs to access this large audience, and set Stephen and that audience right on ADHD. He actually knows the huge body of research evidence, and reads new academic papers all the time. The guy is a real expert - which we desperately need to hear from right now.

[@dreadsndogs4406]

It's his god d*mn responsibility to get Russel on this show after hosting this guy...🤦‍♀️

[@diatonicdelirium1743]

One super simple psychological 'trick' I used during University studies is to *pretend* I liked the subject, no matter how boring. To my own surprise that helped tremendously to motivate me to read the material and actively participate in classes, and I also started enjoying the subject itself - probably because many things turn out to be interesting once you know a bit more about it.

[@LO-bk4bv]

I did that too! I used to get into character and pretended I was a researcher on the topic and loved the material. It worked up until a point.

[@diatonicdelirium1743]

@@LO-bk4bv That's true, for study subjects it's a great strategy, but don't fool yourself into a career you don't actually like ;)

[@tayokarate]

​@@LO-bk4bvlol what was the point where it stopped

[@tassamusiikkia]

Story and advice from Huberman

[@EliteCJI]

Worked for me too!

[@vivekchavanmusic]

I don't know why but the things that this guy is saying is constantly making me tear up. It's exactly what I needed. The level of awareness and reflection you need, to look into the psychological changes in yourself whilst going through them, materialise them into words and then explain it to the world is extraordinary. Thank you for this truly.

[@emmafmaurice]

❤ Right here beside you friend. X

[@JosephSalomonsen]

❤

[@elizabethtucci3305]

This is so extraordinary.

[@SigiCoria-cd9vg]

I have Adult ADD and this video has already distracted my morning routine

[@Steven-bd8mn]

same

[@Mushroom321-]

😅 the irony !!

[@sunnyhanif7496]

I've spent YEARS on self development books, courses, routines, coaches. Man I've given it my all and it only added more stress to my life. I don't think I was a great a great mum during those years. I only got diagnosed a year ago and the penny dropped. Knowing i have ADHD & Autism has allowed me to accept conventional methods may not work. It's ok if i find my own unique ways of getting things done. Getting rid of the belief that i was just plain stupid was liberating. Meds are helping me for now. I may choose not to take them down the line and find other ways to work with it. Or even better, embrace the strengths my ADHD gives me and focus on those rather than trying to live up to the neuro typical model of the world. "If you judge a fish by it's ability to climb, it will spend it's entire life thinking it's stupid' ~ Einstein

[@HaHaLooLoo]

omg this sounds like me. i always just beleive its my fault im dumb im stupid im lazy im not trying hard enough whilst i can show a decade of therapy, self help books, podcasts under my belt to no avail. sure i can COPE but the underlying problem is and always been there

[@bettyjones5375]

I relate to your comment a lot. I also feel that there are times when I haven't been a great mother because of adhd but damn I tried. I was also recently diagnosed too. Before then i thought i was incompetent and a failure

[@aziza000]

I think I might have ADHD. I am just so stupid. I am a law graduate but when it comes to life, I make such silly mistakes, over think basic things, I come across as a right idiot. I feel like even in basic tasks I am being judged on.

[@stachycode]

May I ask how ADHD diagnosing works? I guess you just fill a form with some questions? By the way, Einstein never said this quote :D

[@bettyjones5375]

@@stachycode Even if it wasn't Einstein, someone said that quote and it makes sense :D

[@sherthetruth]

My problem with this interview is his lack of addressing chronic mental health issues like depression alongside trauma caused by grief and other catastrophic life events. His demeanor reminded me of Sheryl Sanberg when she came out with Lean In and told women it was their responsibility to fight to be successful. Years later, her husband died and she realized she was unable to function the same way at work. Then she released a book called Option B about how to navigate life after these circumstances. She later said she took back some of what she said in her first book as it was coming from a person who hadn’t endure the pain she was currently experiencing. These conversations have a lot of nuance to them. While I think it’s great to give advice on building better skills to overcome procrastination, not addressing real issues that the majority of people are dealing with is pretty reckless. We have a mental health crisis in this country and an epidemic of loneliness. This advice will work the best only if you are a healthy moderately functioning person. The lightheartedness and smiling while discussing devastating issues for many people comes across very cold to those needing help. It can create a horrid cycle of shame because it puts people all in the same boat when we all vary widely depending on what has happened to us and the environment we were born into.

[@blondbum]

Great point. When he talked of people in his family "overcoming" adhd it felt so much like the just get over it type. Dismissive without having the experience himself.

[@shaanlusinclair2395]

Sugar is the main thing that causes depression.

[@suziediamondcain]

Dude, the guy is not qualified or experienced enough to speak on brain health challenges which is why HE SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN ASKED TO SPEAK PUBLICALLY ON ADHD

[@amandawilliams4630]

Good points, one solution doesn’t fit all.

[@lynnritchie231]

I have long term mental health issues (PTSD, anxiety, OCD) and I found it quite positive and uplifting.

[@Miner-dyne]

It is amazing to me how many people are triggered by a set of skills offered. I think it may be the clickbaity title. Just listen to a few sentences at 1:20:59 and 1:22:52 No one is taking away your ADHD diagnosis, or shaming you, or telling you to just pay attention. Everyone should be open to learning new skills that can help live a better life. Information is like a buffet, take what suits you, ignore the rest.

[@ps8364]

I agree! I was reading all of these comments and just floored with the angry and defensive comments. I think it is the attachment to not only their “diagnosis”, but to that prescription that they feel lets them accomplish a weeks worth of work in one day. This is coming from someone who does have the dx and the rx. It’s not Limitless pill. There are consequences. You may feel great for however long that medicine lasts, but you have to pay for it. It is an energy debt. There are better, less harmful solutions - nobody wants to hear about that though.

[@zoecoote3746]

Why is contributing a different idea to the one presented classed as “ triggering “. ? That’s very dismissive to a group of people that actually have the condition commenting on the opinion of the person about them that does not.

[@devieilleroche]

I sense that his brief statement about ADHD might lead people to underestimate the complexity of this neurodiversity. Especially for people who are not familiar with it. ADHD isn’t about distraction. Attention-deficit isn’t interchangeable with distraction. When a person with ADHD naturally hyper-focuses on something that interests her/him, anything else, e.g., time, body-awareness would often become oblivious. Or otherwise, if the person has to endure an activity unstimulating, it would be very challenging for the person to stay in focus. And this is not just once a while thing, but all the time, throughout the person’s life. A person with ADHD often see connections in things that people are unaware of, or think several steps ahead, which can also hinder her/him from taking actions or jump in to actions. So having ADHD is a bless and a curse. A person with ADHD can achieve excellence on things they are passionate about or failed miserably to meet the other’s expectations. To identify with the neurodivergence after proper diagnosis isn’t playing victim but rather living a better life through sharing and learning from each other.

[@Pandulaos]

Thank you so much for this comment!

[@finished6267]

Weird. No starving Africans have "ADHD" or "OCD" wonder how many kids in Gaza have "gender dysphoria" and need to retrace their steps after fetching water because "ocd". Yeah it's so complex and nuanced that a doctor can diagnose it in 15 minutes and drug the shit out of ya. The science is in!

[@giselagjana]

Would be fascinating to watch Steve interview 2 guests at the same time, with oppositing opinions/ research

[@abin.3402]

What a brilliant idea! I think that would be very healing for this bipartisan world :)

[@MsKeljon]

Agreed

[@jackieburns1366]

ooh that would be so interesting!!!

[@MerKaBanation]

I agree. Especially when some of the guests who are experts within the same/similar fields with conflicting view points on the same topics!

[@elsacouto209]

This is a debate not a interview!

[@keto-adhd3061]

Lots of bad habits will give adhd like symptoms, that doesn't mean you have adhd. People without adhd will never understand what it is like to actually have adhd and just talk rubbish based on no experience of living with it, Just their own nero typically mind that has occasional inattentive moments. I live my life as clean as possible to improve my symptoms that iv had since 4 years old, I still struggle daily because I have real diagnosed adhd.

[@nigelmarwa6246]

Where is the evidence of your adhd

[@agnesagni]

@@nigelmarwa6246 live with our brain for a day! You'll know. Why is it only ADHD the existence of which people question of all the mental issues? You don't question Tourettes, OCD, a borderline with marks of self harm because they are visible. It would take some deeper going into to observe and acknowledge something that is not obvious to the eye. Do put in the effort before you shut down your mind.

[@suziediamondcain]

Amen to this. I feel ya ❤

[@kwimms]

And you've been lied to since you were 3 years old, now lie to yourself to maintain your victim status. Grow up. Get REAL!

[@imnotcomminghome8110]

Exactly! Neurotypicals always be thinking they understand it all and got a solution that fits everyone and everything lmao

[@enriquefernandezm.9830]

As a 32 y/o man with ADHD diagnosed at 8 y/o who doesn't take medications, only supplements and nootropics. This conversation is GOLD. Last year my ADHD rised and made my productivity go down. I think it is because I started a business and I work solo in my office, "unsupervised" or "accompanied". I went to the psychiatrist, asking for medication, first of all in mexico we don't have Aderall, medications are on shortage maybe worldwide. I took Tradea for 3 or 4 months and I didn't like the effects. Dropped it. Now I take just nootropics, supplements, good nutrition, go to the psychotherapist and swim everyday early in the morning. I'm still strugging, but getting better.

[@dama301]

what do you take sir?

[@julia.ludwig]

I am a freelancer and if I can give you a piece of advice to fight this secondary effect of not being "supervised" or "accompanied" it would be this: find someone, a friend, a family member, a former school mate or even someone on a Facebook group and book appointments with each other during which you have to describe your activity, make a summary of your week/month, list the goals you reached, the ones you missed and the reasons why. And have them do the same about their business. I has a double interest: first, you feel accountable and compelled to produce enough to talk about during the appointments and you might get some great inspiration for your business from your accountability buddy... you might even make a friend! It can be hard to keep focus when we're on our own.

[@JNYC-gb1pp]

You should check out Deep Work by Cal Newport how to get work done efficiently within timeframes - specifically getting work done within a 9-5 and not letting work encroach into your evenings and weekends. He has a youtube channel too where he offers a methodology.

[@hypcro]

🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:00 🧠 Understanding internal triggers is crucial for conquering distraction. 05:14 🔄 Distraction isn't just external; it's also driven by internal triggers. 08:02 📝 Writing down the sensations before distraction helps gain control. 10:52 🤖 Reframing internal triggers as a source of power, not hindrance. 17:31 ⏰ Scheduling time for worry allows you to manage distractions more effectively. 19:40 🕒 Using the 10-minute rule to delay gratification helps establish control over distractions and impulse control issues. 20:10 💼 Schedule time later in the day for "worry time" to address distracting thoughts and worries, allowing the brain to relax. 22:34 🔥 Finish your allocated time box, even if it means sitting there with hands on the keyboard, to overcome the initial boredom and resistance. 23:16 🚫 External triggers can be hacked back by creating friction and using visual cues to communicate your focus, such as a "Do Not Disturb" sign on your monitor. 30:05 💡 Preventing distractions with "pacts": effort pacts (adding friction), price pacts (imposing costs), and identity pacts (aligning with your desired self-image). 38:41 🧠 The discomfort associated with pursuing a task affects motivation and discipline. 39:34 🕹️ Enjoying an activity makes it easier to get into a state of flow. 41:10 🎯 To become indistractable, focus on tasks you don't enjoy but need to do. 45:18 🗓️ Create a time-boxed calendar based on your values to prioritize tasks. 53:40 🤝 Scheduling quality time in relationships helps maintain connection and prioritizes loved ones. 59:14 🧠 Internal vs. external locus of control: People with internal locus of control believe they affect change, leading to better well-being. 01:00:09 🚀 Mindset affects actions: Believing in agency and control leads to healthier lives, even in challenging circumstances. 01:02:59 📱 Responsibility in technology use: While companies design engaging products, personal responsibility and agency are crucial. 01:05:19 🧪 Goblins of trauma: Traumatic experiences can either limit or propel individuals; reframing discomfort is important. 01:12:46 🧭 Facing discomfort: Overcoming pain or discomfort requires exposure therapy, both physiologically and psychologically. Confidence and growth stem from facing challenges. 01:19:06 🧠 Confidence can be built by reframing triggers and adopting a new perspective. 01:19:48 👩‍⚕️ The concept of a brain chemical imbalance is a misconception in the public, not accepted in the Psychology Community. 01:20:42 💊 Skills should be prioritized over pills for treating ADHD; medication can have side effects and should be the last resort. 01:26:13 🤝 ADHD should be seen as treatable, not an identity; focus on skills and functional improvement rather than reliance on medication. 01:37:31 🏢 Indestructible workplaces are built on psychological safety, providing forums to discuss problems, and having management exemplify focused work-life balance. Made with HARPA AI

[@MuzikClassOfficial]

You Da Best

[@vanessapetrea2490]

Thank you! 🙏🏽💜😊

[@leeevans7722]

ADHD is a gift and a curse at the same time, constantly struggling heavily to stick at a job you don’t like/aren’t interested in, the morning depression and the instant switch of moods. It gets under my skins when people generalise it like it’s just one small thing like not being able to focus (which is a stereotype) in itself. Or when people belittle it and look past it like it doesn’t actually affect our day to day lives.

[@FactsBeFacts]

Instant switch of moods? That sounds more like Autism or Bipolar. My mood is always about the same.

[@jessicat2519]

Trauma?

[@K.O.W504]

​@@FactsBeFactssounds like a mood disorder but it's actually not- Russell Barkley Psychiatrist

[@bekahbrown1382]

emotional and mood regulation struggles are a key part of what many with ADHD struggle with, you’re blessed to be spared! but don’t invalidate others or suggest diagnoses which you are unqualified to speak to; and if you are you, shouldn’t be doing it online.

[@onelifenyc]

Sounds just like me 😢

[@discodan2265]

The hardest part of anything is starting. Nothing is ever as bad as we make out in our heads prior to the experience we are freaking out about. ❤

[@angelicaalen]

So true! I started changing my habits during chemotherapy. It wasn’t easy at all but I saw as my only answer.

[@JosephSalomonsen]

❤

[@janelogan4242]

So true.

[@michlangelo2849]

I can start, I find it hard to finish.

[@shabgerye]

Thank you for this interview. This was by far the most implemtable/useful / great interviews so far! He speaks so structured and so well backed up with science.... It's unbelievable ❤

[@themadmachinist8637]

Adhd is my superpower. I embraced the chaos and learned how to decipher multiple streams of information at once. I was able to absorb massive amounts of knowledge early in life. I lost that as I get older but it was a massive boost. Now I organize to keep from getting lost. I tried pills when I was first diagnosed at 7 or 8. That was a disaster. Once I knew what it was I was facing I was able to build mechanisms in my head to help mitigate the negative attributes of adhd. Now I'm a workaholic but I'm in an industry I love so I devote a lot of time to it. Eventually I'd like to be an owner of my own venture but I've spent the last 20 years honing my craft.

[@KylieMackLA]

I propose the next DOAC dinner be made up of 20 viewers who've been diagnosed with ADHD, Steven, this guy, and a highly qualified ADHD expert - a real one. If you could get all 20 there on time, and keep them at the table, THIS would be the ADHD conversation many would like to see 👍

[@garaadsan.6191]

Great idea.

[@kel7410]

You mean a highly qualified ADHD expert that benefits from the ADHD gravy train. You mean the same expert who readily puts kids on medication when other ways of addressing bad behaviour and lack of discipline would have sufficed.

[@tracybenson6364]

No one with ADHD will ever sit through this interview. I’m out’

[@agnesagni]

@@kel7410 your attitude is exactly the one that couples ADHD with trauma. Under this pretext, children with ADHD are beaten, abused, harshly disciplined, broken. They become depressed as adults, cannot function better at all. They loose touch with what they are good at, they become empty. I presume you will never ever take any medication for anything ever, or give any pill from any pharmaceutical company to any of your loved ones, just to prove your point.

[@kel7410]

@@agnesagni dear I respect your views but I respectfully disagree. Kids with such problems are usually lacking in discipline and boundaries so parents are usually to blame. They should try doing the difficult job of fixing their mistakes through diligent parenting instead of looking for a quick fix and leading kids to possibly a life of perpetual medication. It is usually something that happens in the West. I am British and African so I know.

[@Mel130673]

He’s got a point for everyone else….but NOT people struggling with ADHD.

[@urikatjiuongua6150]

Stop the victim mentality, ADHD is tough but not unbearable.

[@LO-bk4bv]

There is great risk when people who are not qualified talk about mental health/disorders, etc as though they are an authority on the subject. It’s dangerous and I’m surprised that this channel gives people a platform to spread misinformation.

[@12342087]

Bang on!

[@chrisdague5153]

@@urikatjiuongua6150 Stop the holier than though mentality. Some people do better or worse than others, but it doesn't make you a better person than anybody, beyond the fact that it's literally impossible to judge somebody else's experience anyways. You also go around slapping wheelchair-bound people in the face and telling them to get tf up?

[@dlightfoot]

It's definitely not unbearable for me, but my girlfriend finds me unbearable when I don't take my medication. @@urikatjiuongua6150

[@kristinetenova2804]

i love how the box under the video has the topics, when i rewatch the podcast it is made so easy to go back to a certain part of the interview .

[@Tocabocakids2024]

I loved the information Nir had to give. I plan on reading his book and implementing his advice to avoid distraction. Thank you both, be blessed!

[@michellewalters3291]

If you are concerned about neurotypical people fooling doctors into prescribing stimulant medication, then keep this topic the focus of the discussion. If you're concerned that there is not enough guidance for doctors to diagnose ADHD appropriately, raising awareness to this issue would be of benefit. If you are asked about psychological disorders of which you have limited knowledge (as evidenced by the opinions about dopamine, chemical imbalance and "undiagnosis" - comparing it to a broken bone), an appropriate response would be to say "This topic is out of my scope so it's probably best that I don't comment". The reason some viewers have reacted strongly to the ADHD topic of this podcast is because people with ADHD are already struggling to cope with the symptoms of ADHD and the stigma of seeking help - which comes in the form of a diagnosis and possible medication. They do not need the wider community, armed with the opinion and misinformation in this podcast, to second-guess their diagnosis and to be looked upon as a drug-seeking layabout who is taking the "easy way" out. These medications are no walk in the park and they are only given when a person presents to a specialist due to an inability to regulate themselves. The diagnostic process, while not ideal in respect to being foolproof, is the only one currently available. No blood test or brain imaging results are approved for diagnosing ADHD, but neither are there for autism spectrum disorder, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, anxiety and depression.

[@DB-jx3oo]

Thank you for taking the time to write out my exact frustrations

[@junipajen]

well said, thank you. perfect reply.

[@MissSweetMelo]

Beautifully summarized!! Thank you❤

[@theinngu5560]

The thing is that when you don’t like what others think of you it’s actually because you don’t think we’ll of yourself and that is hard to take. If you thought well of yourself then it really wouldn’t bother you what others think….eg if someone called you a dog, you would know you don’t have a tail and so think that person is mad and perhaps feel sorry for them but not believe them. The problem is with diagnosis it gives a person a label which initially may feel like relief but a label is an identity which in itself is false as no condition is permanent and whilst it may feel nice to ‘know’ it then imprisons you …you think this condition is me and so you hate it when others don’t seem to understand etc. No condition is permanent.

[@osirusj275]

@@theinngu5560 are non verbal autistic permanent?

[@jeanshelbybooks4154]

I love the distraction discussion. I’m a writer and even during this interview I admitted to myself that when I distract myself during my writing time, it’s to distract from my fear of failing at writing. Wow what a great interview!

[@Cnsalmoni]

Not so for us with ADHD. Would that it were that simple.

[@user-tr7yg7zo3j]

I’m a writer, too, and an artist - and I live with regret every day. I write, I make art - but I am stuck when it comes to selling what I create. For me, using social media as a distraction from doing the “work” of my “work” comes from loneliness I don’t want to admit (I am kind of a loner, but I also have a lot of friends who live too far away to visit but another distraction is talking to each other for hours, because they are lonely, too.) Also: I think I feel resentful that not only do I make the creative work (I do art all the time - no block there- occasional writers block, but I write easily (most of the time) - I also then have to market and sell it. I feel overwhelmed, so I resort to social media, true crime, fashion-watching - You Tube stuff - and yes, lots of emotional/spiritual/inspirational channels like this to help me stay in the present. I have a decent job as a phone emo/career-coach myself, with many wonderful clients, and as an empath I adore being giving and useful to people who call for my help, but I need help moving my art and writing into the wider world. I have a beautiful website for my art but rarely spend time marketing myself and my latest novel is languishing on Google Docs waiting for the final few chapters of my latest novel. So what do I do? Call V and A and chat for hours about stuff, follow yet another ongoing true crime drama, watch a film noir, post my art or other stuff on Facilebook or Instabomb and see what my friends are commenting about it - and put up rambling responses like this one to shore up my ego and self-awareness that I’m still alive, lol. Anyway, you gave me some “traction” today. I feel like I can take some action. And yes, it’s true that when I do what I need and plan to do I feel great. I’ll check back in and let you know what happened. Thanks for the nudge, noodge. 😂

[@tooflowery]

omg! i've read your book coping with yarn!! never thought i'll be able to connect with you on youtube!?! i'm sorry if you're another writer with same name, then you can ingnore.

[@ThatBlondeRecluse]

His description of burnout happening from a position of high expectations with low sense of control hit me in my soul! I’m an addiction counselor in a grant funded facility. The pace is RELENTLESS. I absolutely love & believe in what I do… but I feel the strain psychologically & emotionally, more because of those combined factors & had never put that together. I actually tested up when his words hit me. It’s the hopelessness of it. It’s what I go to work to help others deal w/ every day & yet my workplace & work load produces it in me.

[@jhfromhj2766]

Grants are often short-term, too adding to your stress. What came to my mind was life with my dark triad husband (now ex-husband). High expectations for the children and I, never satisfied and never relinquishing control.

[@RealityCheckSimulation]

I have ADHD & was prescribed concerta. I have Finally Started organizing & cleaning my room while listening to this Is podcast. I have not taken my medication in 2 days. So I appreciate a different perspective & mindset to help me analyze, focus & accomplish this small task that I have procrastinated on.

[@ragedef7ms]

Would love a follow up on where you’re at now!

[@dns_error]

magic mushrooms solves it all

[@ep5957]

I was diagnosed and placed on medication, than I learned that my diet was causing glucose spikes and also bad habits like too much screen time were causing my adhd symptoms. I wish you all the luck on your journey to cleaning your body of those meds. ❤

[@zoecoote3746]

A good psychiatrist will do allergy testing and nutrient level testing and remedy any imbalances before putting you on medication:

[@nextgenmystix5304]

How are u know comparatively

[@tdg6372]

Every single study has shown that ADHD is heavily under diagnosed, especially in Adults. Around 70% of adult's with the condition don't know they have it.

[@Cmoore-Books]

It’s so true! It’s especially under diagnosed in women. I’m almost 35 and was just diagnosed last year. My sister is 32 and was just diagnosed this year.

[@andie9589]

So many victim beliefs, so sad.

[@ousontmeslunettes9891]

As long you find tricks to overcompensate there is nothing to diagnose.

[@MsElke11]

I believe ADHD is a state of mind which is why kids who hate school often have it but later do really well in the hands on working world. I, on the other hand, was a very focused student, and then once I hit the working world, I just hated reading and wanted to just MOVE and LIVE!

[@mariahconklin4150]

Yep! I keep getting diagnosed with BPD but I have Auditory Processing Disorder and possibly ADHD. I am also so directionally challenged possibly due to my APD. Too much background noise and I have a hard time functioning in life it sucks.

[@jpjapers]

I have ADD. Currently procrastinating with this podcast.

[@amadeuscrossing7061]

Same here...

[@chiquicat1]

You don’t ‘have’, you have been ‘diagnosed with’ ❤

[@mhtbfecsq1]

Explain what happens ..

[@jpjapers]

@@mhtbfecsq1 what do you mean?

[@mhtbfecsq1]

@@jpjapers just curious what it's like

[@GB-TX]

30 seconds in with this man, and I learned more / more resonated with me than 90% of content I see.

[@alensiljak]

Such a great episode. So much of this rings true and is terribly important. Thanks, Steven.

[@story.7162]

Listen, I am one of these adults who have recently been diagnosed with ADHD, but… I’ve been diagnosed on the basis that the ADHD is actually a pathology of symptoms caused by a primary problem, which is untreated undiagnosed C-PTSD due to traumas in my childhood 🤯 I am taking medications whilst I undertake trauma-based psychotherapy and EDMR. Like Doc said that our internal distractions, our feelings, are just our brains looking for distractions reduce our discomfort, that’s also what ADHD is for me… my baby brain reducing my pain by escaping into dreaming and dopamine seeking.

[@ginacirelli1581]

As a fellow C-PTSD survivor, I believe that trauma is the elephant in the room and is to blame for a whole host of society's problems. I'm glad that we're finally beginning some real studies into it.

[@HaHaLooLoo]

omg wow ...... this sounds just like me and my life tho i havent been diagnosed with ADHD :(. but i have had significant childhood and adolescent trauma.

[@story.7162]

@@ginacirelli1581 same! I am reading through these comments too, people feeling attacked that their ADHD isn't being taken seriously by this Doctor, but I wonder how many of them are using their very real ADHD symptoms as a *distraction* to allieviate them from the pain of the truth, that it is their trama and anxiety that is causing their ADHD. It's the flight and freeze stress response encoded.

[@story.7162]

@@HaHaLooLoo Looking at ADHD thought a trauma/stress repsonse lense changed everything for me. And the Doctor is right here, in my opinion, because my treating psychiatrist said the same thing: "medication is no replacement for therapy and skills building".

[@Self-Care-Embodiment-Coach]

Congratulations on your awareness. You are in a powerful place. Everyone needs to know their ACE score. Symptoms of ADHD and trauma look exactly the same. I was diagnosed in the 90’s and became medication resistant six months later. When in doubt always extend grace to yourself. Your journey may get hard. Heading happens. Good luck. I believe in you!

[@resonatingspirit]

The ADHD test ‘ he was referring to is the online Mickey Mouse test not the actual test or the test which some practitioners are making an absolute mint on. The actual test is very comprehensive. It is chemical and sometimes caused by trauma and also quite often co-morbid with autism. If you have met some someone who has it, it will quite often when untreated be coupled with addiction from self medicating. I agree it is being over diagnosed from people who would like to profit. But it is a real thing and it is not a scheduling issue or a discipline issue. They don’t need any more shame around not being able to prioritise, turn up on time, or the reverse be over productive for an extended amount of time. Also ADHD is not about being distracted that is a reductive statement.

[@ElinWinblad]

Exactly I have 12 alarms for my morning to get to work on time and even then I sometimes don’t hear the alarms (while up and getting ready) it’s on my watch /phone the only reason I can remember to set them before bed is anxiety. Anxiety gets all the credit for any ounce of functioning I’ve had in life.

[@sinisterkitty8411]

Thank you! I am so fed up with "experts" claiming ADHD isn't real--or implying there should be even MORE hoops to jump through to get diagnosed. I wish they would follow one of us for a week and watch our desperate, tenuous grip on our jobs, relationships, and daily lives. The dopamine deficit is an actual thing. So is PubMed. I wish they'd check it out before they start their know-it-all blather...

[@ematise]

​@@ElinWinblad Pff it's so true. The only way we can do things is to be anxious about doing them. It's so sad.

[@ematise]

Other than questionaire test for ADHD there's the brain waves test. When they EEG your brainwaves it's clear that your brain has differences compared to normal brains when you have it (P300 it's low in amplitude and it's latency increased.) This makes it very hard to start doing anything, making it hard to listen and focus on your thoughts, to select an idea and follow it correctly, to stay on task, to switch between tasks. So if somebody is trying to counteract this with behavioral interventions first/only, the result will be only more lost time before getting to the treatment. The treatment gives you the start to counteract the effects of the ADHD. Then you can start working on yourself and taking care for yourself. Thanks!

[@ItsKatsuragi]

The problem with diagnosing ADHD starts with the fact you can't just test it. It's something that has to be evaluated over a LONG period of time in the majority of cases.

[@ninapisarcikova3977]

This podcast completely changed my life. I look forward to every episode, every single one is interesting and does not bore me at all. This is probably the only podcast that does not make me also scroll on my phone while listening because it is so interesting! Thank you!

[@Kobe29261]

The only one, really? You ever listen to Huberman or Lex Friedman? Sam Harris?

[@michaelhien9152]

I found your channel 2 days ago. Loved it. Quickly went through like 20 episodes. This one is my favorite. I'm leaving this comment here hoping that one day it's gonna be something that we'll talk about. Thank you so much for bringing this much value. And yes. I watched to the last second.

[@marksage351]

The dopamine hypothesis regarding ADHD has not been debunked. This hypothesis has been exrremely robust despite decades of research. Further, ADHD/ADD is chronically under diagnosed, especially in school aged girls and women. It is one thing to critique the criteria published in the DSM V TR and how a physician may use this to make a diagnosis. It is another thing entirely to dismiss the findings of neurological research or to say that these findings have been debunked when they have not. This author has some interesting things to say regarding the behavioural aspects of inattention. He could have said these things without casting shade on members of the audience who genuinely suffer from these conditions. We still have a lot to learn about ADHD, but on these points that were mentioned, we have not 'got ADHD wrong.'

[@suziediamondcain]

❤❤❤

[@iamcharmquark]

I will first admit off the bat that I did not watch this entire interview. The teaser alone made me super mad. I think people don't understand that there is a difference between people who self-diagnose and people who are professionally diagnosed. I hear a lot of people I know say they have ADHD, and as a person who has struggled without a diagnosis my whole life, and finally gotten one, I know that there is a really big problem with people who do not have it to misunderstand it, mislabel it, and draw conclusions that are false. They also usually overlook the larger umbrella of neurodivergence that it falls into, which has to do with a lot more than productivity. It's a fundamental difference in the way you process everything. This is absolutely a condition of brain dysfunction that is quantifiable. For me, I didn't really believe it until I was given drugs. When speed makes you calm, and you feel like you can actually think at a pace that you can keep up with, you know that your brain is wired very differently than neurotypical brains. Add to that the other symptoms of neurodivergence like sensory differences and how you interact with other people, and it's absolutely nuts to dismiss it as a legitimate cause for lowered productivity. To shame people for this is pretty unconscionable. I hope Steven will have someone on to discuss this stuff as a rebuttal because I feel like this attitude could be harmful to people watching this who do struggle with it.

[@yukikowu5695]

Agreed. Lots of misinformation from this author and it is offensive to those who truly suffer from the disorder.

[@seiboshen]

I think anyone who gets offended by this or doesn’t believe this guy has a point will be a slave to pills for the rest of their lives. I’ve been diagnosed for adhd over 15 times in my life and giving this guy a chance saved me from taking legal meth

[@jerry716]

This podcast came out at such an important time for me. I am overhwelmed by my workload everyday and by working in a remote setting for a Startup, it comes at no surprise. What resonated with me is prioritization and aligning my workload with my boss's. This is so key and I am thankful to have learnt this.

[@CromeLF2]

This was the best talk I've ever heard about this topic or maybe even any topic, thank you for that!

[@katyducharme1346]

Regret was 100% the motivator in the journey to overcoming my adhd identity. And it's wild how subliminal distraction is!

[@yanets.4786]

it is scary how heated it is the comment section! Now, i really want to hear someone on the other side of this discussion, someone like a psychiatrist who specializes on ADHD, and their insight on this topic.

[@sincerely5elina]

Watch the podcast with Dr Gabor Mate

[@TomBeardshaw]

Agreed, They should get Russell Barkley on….a real expert. Gabor Mate is excellent on trauma, in which subject he is a specialist. Sadly, he talks too much about ADHD for someone who has never conducted any primary research into it. Like many trauma specialists, he tends to think trauma is behind everything. 80% of ADHD is genetic, while 15% is early childhood trauma. (Russell Barkley) Gabor Mate is not someone to listen to on ADHD

[@prodigalknitter1]

Not scary. Interesting, eye opening, worth discussing, but not scary.

[@ShulaTheDon13]

The problem is of course the psychiatrist thinks there are an abundance of mental health issues. Just like a surgeon thinks they can solve your problem with surgery a chiropractor with adjustments, a dietitian with eating better etc… every professional is just as biased.

[@zoecoote3746]

Why is people disagreeing with this person scary ?

[@petitemaam]

I have always asked my boss to prioritize my work when I'm handed more than they realize. Managers love this, they feel flattered that you're coming to them, and they don't have to hear someone coming to complain. The work has to be done, and understanding that is big to them. It's also a time to shine because you get to show everything you do. In the past my manager took some of that work themselves after seeing everything I do and have been capable of and ask me how I got so much done 😂

[@globalismoblackman]

Smart Melly Mel 😁😂😁👍✅

[@bryceharris2707]

I’m late to this episode but when you were talking about burnout it dawned on me why so many nurses, I’m a nurse, were depressed during covid and in general our population deal with higher levels depression, anxiety and burnout more than other fields. The expectations on nurses is extremely high. “The most trusted profession” we are in charge of life, and more often than not, we can control the outcome. despite all our efforts, sometimes our patients die, or get sicker, and we are in the room for it all. Man this hit home. Thanks.

[@Blackwaterswamp]

Everything he says is triggering but accurate. If you are triggered, you aren't taking responsibility for your own life. We all have trauma, myself included. I was triggered by his words, but I feel motivated to change my life. Truth always hurts. 🔥❤️

[@razorwireclouds5708]

It's not triggering, it's just fucking dumb. I'm 36 and have taken responsibility for everything in my life. I've dealt with and resolved my trauma in therapy. I've been meditating daily for +3 years. I work out 4x per week. My diet is healthy and comprehensive. My sleep schedule is amazing. However, nothing has cured my ADD. I'm lucky I don't have the hyperactivity component. My lifestyle helped my symptoms, but they're far from cured. My medication helped me more than anything, so I don't wanna hear this double-digit IQ bullshit from another productivity grifter.

[@vegacardullo1917]

Your show is adding so much to my life. Thank you for picking and choosing guests so well. I look forward to implementing these ideas to help with the struggles of focus ❤

[@ElinWinblad]

Adhd tip if anyone else struggles with getting up grumpy /pain no matter how much sleep you get. - set one alarm 2 hours before it’s time to get up. Tricks brain into thinking I’m getting to sleep in. Do I have one at 5am and one at 7 and back up one for 730 and 735 then getting ready alarms every 5-10 minutes till 820- I mix the times to help brain not get used to 10 minute increments. I do label them for hard days like “put shoes on” “leave” “leave now” etc

[@gaberoyalll]

That's a cool tip 😎 thanks for sharing that

[@jamiebom1023]

I don't have ADHD but I have always done this trick of setting an early alarm so I can go back to sleep. I assumed a lot of people did this.

[@ElinWinblad]

@@jamiebom1023 like a lot of adhd tips I feel some ppl naturally find them but not others and Vice versa 😊 glad it works for you also

[@suziediamondcain]

Adhd tip- don't watch this episode 😂

[@conny-mariedomke]

I love your podcast! I've only listened to a few episodes and I've learnt an incredible amount. What I particularly like is the interview format and the focus on the tips that are really applicable. This episode is one of the best! Please keep up the good work. Greetings from Germany

[@meg27mm]

What a bloody brilliant conversation between two brilliant minds. Saved to my playlist and one to revisit over and over. Will be picking up his book. So grateful for this platform, Steven!!!!!!

[@Oblisk]

When it comes to social media being a distraction, KZbin is my main one because of how it’s connected to my personal life of learning. I’ve learned about 90% of what I’ve learned in the past two years all from KZbin alone. And it continues to be the main source of my “self education.” But a lot of the time, it went from using KZbin deliberately as a education tool to becoming a form of entertainment. Even while still watching all the educational content I would normally consume. What this video has taught me is how I need to be more deliberate and intentional on how I use KZbin or any other social media for that matter. Instead of waking up and going straight into listening to a podcast that I’m most likely not even fully engaged into, setting a focus time for that will break the entertainment aspect of it and allow me to actually focus on what I’m watching and learning.

[@angonorato1770]

Every word of this is my life too!

[@rkjeffery777]

Please make sure you guys are at least trying to fact check some of the information you learn online. Everyone these days thinks they know everything when they've only got their info from 1 source.

[@user-pd7il3xz5j]

Problem is...there is a ton of misinformation on UTube.

[@dndnpc]

The segments on trauma and ADHD should be cut or at least not be the focus of the title. He's clearly not an expert on those, made especially obvious at his non-nonchalant comment about exposure therapy. The good parts about habits and distractions follow many concepts of stoicism and I like many of his points there.

[@suziediamondcain]

❤❤❤

[@Laddie999]

A much needed conversation! This podcast relieved so many of my open questions about flow, procrastination, and willpower!

[@ceoa]

Recognizing the emotions your feeling that cause you to be distracted....Really has helped me . Write the feeling down, but don't give in to it right then. Build self control brick by brick. 💡

[@angry-prol]

There are points in this podcast which are great food for thought about taking responsibility for our own behaviour. However there are some quite glaring points where Nir demonstrates some very narrow thinking about neurodiversity and the vulnerability of certain groups of people. For example he doesn’t suggest that people with mental disabilities such as LD might be a group that need to be protected from social media. ADHD is quite often coupled with other diagnostic conditions such as autism, brain injury etc. In essence his analysis is mainly focused on people fortunate to be genuinely neurotypical but might be inclined to victimise or create excuses for themselves. That has some value but I think some people listening to this might be quite unfairly upset about parts of his message.

[@angry-prol]

Also nicotine can be both a stimulant AND a depressant. He is objectively wrong to suggest it is one but not the other.

[@CourtneyFults27533]

THANK YOU!! 💛

[@manifestationmichelle1199]

You’re using it as a label too- he points that out. Where your attention goes, energy flows

[@jarirepo1172]

Funny thing about any advice against procrastination is that people suffering from it find it very hard to make those changes in the first place - they'd rather do it later, even if they realize they will never do it anyway. Or they know they won't be able to keep up with it anyway so they won't try. And.. most people have tried. Several times. At some point, you realize ok, this is how the world works for me, I have to adjust my expectations and realize what I can and cannot do. No amount of "break any habit"-advice will never help.

[@TamaraJoy7]

As someone who works with kids in primary school everyday this episode on being Indistractable was GOLD! I got so much out of it and for the first time, started taking notes, something I should do for every episode here! (I’m a long time subscriber)… What struck me most, and there were a few things, was the quote: a mistake repeated more than once is a decision”… wow! I’ll be thinking on that point for a long time! Then the discussion on Burnout was super interesting… it really hit home… I’m a private music teacher, have been for 38 years, and I love my job… but, I’ve felt like quitting so often lately as I’m sick of asking kids to practice at home each week, but, due to “ distractions” they more often than not, don’t practice… it drives me crazy.. and it’s definitely got worse over the last 10 to 15 years..!…this conversation taught me that I’m feeling burnt out not from over work, but from having high expectations of my students, but no control of whether they do or do not practice at home. 😳😱 total light bulb moment! So, it seems my only option to coping with this dilemma, besides giving the parents this book about navigating distractions is to lower my expectations…. But then I feel like I’m compromising my values-in multiple ways… it’s a tricky problem and one thousands of teachers of all kinds have to deal with… every day … any teachers out there who can relate!?..❤️❤️.

[@robertgoes79]

Can you make it fun to practice? Maybe give the kids exercises of musical pieces they recognize and love?

[@angelphilbert]

@@robertgoes79 Thanks for this.

[@Trisha_B_done]

Still in mid podcast but truly enjoying and appreciating it. I always enjoy how Steven brings hus personal quuestions, which I can relate to in ny own life, to each person he interviews. This one is having a positive impact bc I usually can't, or don't, identify what I am feeling which led to the distraction..

[@MerKaBanation]

It's amazing how he briefly touched on such an important topic right towards the end, the topic of religion, which came up for me right at the beginning of this episode. I've been thinking lately how this is the one subject that hasn't really been explored on this podcast and how amazing it would be to hear Steven speak to certain guests on the subject of religion and bring on people specifically to talk about it. I think this would make for some extremely interesting conversations. I agree with everything Nir Eyal had to say about missing out on important values that religion has to offer. I also enjoyed this episode much more than I thought I would. Thanks always Steven!

[@kwimms]

ADHD is just disconnection from God... walk in the light and be blessed.

[@ElizabethAnneO1]

As someone coming from the same position as Nils, I would add that one thing I regret/find great is the whole family dressing up and going out together one day a week. 😊

[@Mathchickey]

​@kwimms that is a total load of crap.

[@healgrowlovecommunity8397]

The "high expectation/low control" really hit home for me. I have experienced this in two jobs - as a Customer Service team leader in Tesco and as a Customer Service broadband telephone helpline operator for TalkTalk. As an ex Nurse, the customer help aspect was very important to me...and I foolishly assumed, because of the job descriptions...that it would be important to my employers too, Wrong. They asked for, and expected, predetermined successful outcomes while simultaneously making those outcomes almost unobtainable by the systems they had in place. For a long time, I felt I was failing and was burning out until I realized their business model and then I left. Soul destroying. I still (ten years later) get PTSD if I walk into any Tesco super market.

[@SybalJanssen]

Over the course of years I have been in a number of workshops where exercises were presented in which the participants did a simple repetitive exercise over and over again. At first the boredom was aweful and there was fidgeting and yawning and sleepiness and anger and we kept going and going and then there was a breakthrough into a state some might consider ecstatic . What I gained from that is the personal insight that boredom is the most devious last ditch trick of my mind. Now for me boredom is last step before a shift into a new mental state.

[@sharonirungu2092]

I can't believe that I got all this information for free. Thank you for impacting the world in a positive way that makes us better each day. Lots of love from Kenya 🇰🇪

[@jerzeygaucho24]

I feel like conversations like this are great tool as we learn to manuever life with minds that operate differently. We'll be learning forever. When one finds something that works for them the quality of life for that individual improves. Hope we all figure it out one day.

[@elisabethtracy1326]

Thank you so much for bringing this to us! I have also been "diagnosed" with ADHD, and had been trying to learn tips and tactics to help with the symptoms. This interview was an answer to prayer and more!!!! I have moved forward more emboldened and sure of my choices, handling situations way more calmly. I am so glad to have a different point of view on attention, AND tools to use going forward. Also, I had no idea I was living with victim mentality relating to this subject until it was called out so clearly on this episode! It has been so liberating ever since. Also just as liberating was his explanation of distraction and traction. Him saying he didn't care if you played video games or scrolled social media so long as you had originally planned on it was and eye opener. Implementing just the basics has already been a game changer. Thank you, again, for bringing this information to us.

[@_rhapsodist]

but honestly, who the hell plans to scroll meaninglessly on social media for hours?

[@LauriVaitti]

​@@_rhapsodistall of us

[@akouo]

Great contents and impressive clarity ! The definition of burnout meets the very reality I did experienced, by the way. Thanks !

[@tedley70]

That was a great corroboration of the worldview I've subconsicously built throughout my life. That said, being diagnosed in my 30's with ADHD did help me to seek specific *types* of solutions to problems I wasn't overcoming on my own. I'm SO glad I wasn't diagnosed as a kid, because I never had an excuse to fail or give up at anything: in fact, I wasn't allowed by my parents to give up, ever. Addiction can be very physical and literal, the way someone recently commented, but there are an infinite range of things to "be addicted to," and very, very few of those things are truly physically addictive, and more a result of not taking responsibility for our actions. Again, I have ADHD and I can see in my own life how everything is a response to discomfort, and how success is always beyond discomfort.

[@officialshalo1436]

This has been one of the most enjoyable podcasts i've listened to, thoroughly enjoyed it all the way through.. 🙏

[@jasongrob165]

Trauma isn’t just feelings. 1:11:10. Trauma is what happens to you in the long term of the traumatic event or repeated events.

[@ExNihilo634]

Yup, it’s terrible having some guru with an MBA on talking about real mental health issues and disorders. Very irresponsible of the DOAC team. Might be best to report this as misinformation.

[@vanessavandevelde146]

Yes, the trauma-part of this video is shockingly unnuanced. And maybe smaller action are open for interpretation but definitely not all. That is such a bad thing to say. The soldier didn't feel his arm was gone because of adrenaline, not because of attention... Wauw... Such good insight on focus (or traction) but what a disaster was this on the trauma part.

[@martinjanza34]

give him a break ok, he said he was not perfect ok? why are everyone expecting people just be perfect? they are also learning...why your expectations are so high? @@vanessavandevelde146

[@Brian_Crow]

"Time management is pain management. All human behavior is driven by a desire to escape discomfort."

[@user-sy4nw6vv6l]

The wait 10 minutes trick and internal locus of control. Great points. He didn't mention dopamine which is also a big factor. One trick I discovered is to appreciate the small progress you are making on a difficult task - look at it up close - like scraping paint off a wall - it's daunting so just zoom into the tiny progress and appreciate the tiny steps to success.

[@theartofmakingphotography]

I wish more people where covering this subject as living whit this can’t be a real pain and having autism but being highly functioning with how society views people like me is a real bloody pain. A lot of people think that having a disability gives them a chance to take advantage of me. I’m 40 and it’s not my disability’s that is massing up my life buy how others acted around me that is at times very abusing and degrading. Thank you for covering this subject 😊

[@tracysternburg]

What happens when you have done everything right and then get an untreated injury and extensive gaslighting that produces 5 years of stress and trauma. Then you are diagnosed with a autoimmune disease that literally makes working out or even working impossible along with changing my diet, I don’t drink or smoke and spend 3/4 of my in bed. I worked out until I just couldn’t anymore. I have done everything. I was an example of exposure therapy and it just made it worse. I am working on intermittent fasting, take ice baths and weaning myself off as much meds as possible with the help of my doctor. I have change my diet and cutting out sugar and processed food, altho I have always ate relatively healthy and worked out 4-6x week. But the progress has been negligible. This disease has taken all the things I loved away from me. I love your channel and your podcasts are great but so far, it just breaks my heart because I just don’t see how I can change something that won’t allow me to do the things that would actually help me. Working on Marissa Peers meditation now. 🤞

[@oluremiwright187]

I always to listen to something different but I always end up coming back here. Thanks Steve.

[@jahmellejeriah3299]

Another amazing podcast episode. Awesome amounts of knowledge to implement

[@StarlightNkyra]

Who else got distracted while watching this?

[@alexitamm72]

😂😂 yes

[@tipofthefingercomedy5071]

Only about 5 times in the first 20 minutes, but in my defense I was getting ready for work lol

[@julianmoreno9121]

😂😮😢

[@kelsibee1855]

Lolol yeah me up in these comments 😂

[@auriyanalee]

Yeah I came back multiple times 😅

[@remkojerphanion4686]

Wow, Mr. Nir Eyal begins by speaking about regret! I have thankfully gotten rid of (almost) all regret that I had carried along with me for most of my life. Regret was a ball and chain around my neck, constantly dragging me down, draining my physical and emotional energy, and it stressed my entire system to breaking point. The problem was, I never even knew that I was suffering from long-term regret in the first place! I just felt awful without knowing why. Since the day that I decided to really let go of my regrets, I have felt liberated - reborn even. If you are reading this, and you perhaps suffer from regret in a big way, I hope sincerely that you too may find a way to eliminate regret, and reboot your life.

[@udou9877]

U had me at "Avoiding distraction is the key to not living w/ regret" (Thank u🙏🏽)

[@bn2469]

I absolutely love this guy, this is helping me has open my eyes and my mind, no excuses just do it, lift yourself up with your SELF and you'll have no regrets. And the great things is, he tells you how it was for himself before he did the work! ❤❤❤❤❤

[@ElijahZuBailey]

00:00 Avoiding distraction is the key to not living with regret. 05:21 Distraction is an action we take, not something that happens to us. 15:13 Mastering internal triggers and making time for traction are key to high performance. 19:57 Compartmentalize distractions with worry time and finish time boxes 28:33 Prevent distraction with pacts 33:33 Discipline is not a limited resource, but a belief that it is can limit willpower. 42:45 Schedule time for self-care, relationships, and work 47:23 Time blocking can improve productivity and relationships 57:19 Believing in agency and control improves well-being 1:02:18 Smart regulation needed for tech companies 1:11:47 Trauma is neutral, it's how we interpret it that matters. 1:16:40 Confidence comes from reframing triggers through exposure therapy. 1:26:55 Over-diagnosis of ADHD is a concern due to trivialization and potential benefits to certain industries. 1:31:46 Building an indestructible workplace requires psychological safety and a forum to talk about problems. Crafted by Merlin AI.

[@tabathaogost4982]

Thank you!

[@PedroRafael]

Wonderful quote quoted by Nir: "A mistake repeated more than once is a decision."

[@emilyday5128]

Wow great episode! Love the extreme ownership message! That’s going to push people far in life! 🎉

[@chrisaay5547]

what i’ve learned from life is that no matter how amazing/influential a person is, their reality/biases will always inform their prescribed solutions. You can see that Stephen struggles with the concept of ADHD because he doesn’t believe in it- point blank. And i’m so aware of using labels as crutches but what’s just as dangerous is dismissing the realities of other people.

[@kittynekocat]

This interview has some interesting points, but is also filled with some really questionable information. The sections on trauma, pain and addition really got me wondering if I can trust any of the things he mentioned

[@lilianaestradaiturria2468]

Please interview Dr Daniel Amen! I read his books and with his scan proves the difference between someone with ADHD and a healthy brain

[@suziediamondcain]

❤❤❤

[@fantameite6590]

I HAVE WATCHED SO MANY OF YOUR VIDEOS AND NEVER COMMENTED ANYTHING BUT FOR SOME REASON I MISSED THIS ONE. BUT THIS ONE.... THIS OONEE IS THE BEST ONE!! SO MANY GREAT NUGGETS, THANK YOU!

[@rebeccaconlon9743]

I see it much like my depression and dislexia, its a learnt behaviour that has been intrinsically pushed its way into my physiology. Constant stress and anxeity in my childhood created chemical issues and a habit of being that way later in my life, i knew no better. So, i pushed myself to do things and keep going with it, etc, its hard work, but im now medication free, my dyselexia is no longer in my way or affecting my memory etc. Many of theses diagnosis are simply caused by how our lives develope ourselves. Such as children brought up with the inability to appreciate calm and stable boundaries and stable homes, tend to be diagnosed with ADHD... but also not having a release and calm when we're stressed.

[@nicolabishop996]

This is a big component of many types of meditation. Emotions/feelings aren't wrong, they are beautiful messages to take us inward to 'feel'. What we may discover is beyond surprising and life changing.....in a very good way.

[@msch7620]

I take ADHD medication AND I meditate. Meditation on its own is not enough for me.

[@lwazingxola2334]

Absolutely get the idea of expectation v/s your perception of your own agency; I find it such an important idea in my life as an entrepreneur. I have a practice of fostering personal agency (perhaps bordering perfectionism, it has its own flaws), however, it comes in handy when facing seemingly insurmountable challenges. I guess when the perception of our internal resources being insufficient for the problem(s) at hand, leads to loss of hope, and of cause, greater likelihood of falling in to depression. Very Interesting. Thanks Nir.

[@jennyvalcore6417]

This Podcast/Channel is my absolute favorite. The way these conversations go and the interview is the best I've seen. Thank you for doing these!

[@pizzianinja]

the willpower idea is really interesting I agree I don't think you can run out of willpower, but I do believe that willpower can often lead to sensory overload, and that's what actually causes the burn out It also makes me think about the idea of decision fatigue where if you have too many options to choose from, you'll probably overthink yourself into a cycle of never choosing anything

[@Asheanae]

Oooo, you got me at reframing the internal triggers! I've been trying and failing to write about a huge idea for about 5 years... I haven't been succeeding because of the weight of the pressure to succeed... 😢

[@psoozan9648]

Me too!

[@AnthonyWasiukiewicz]

9 minutes in and I’m already in awe. I love these podcasts and information from people who throw out, rewrite, or redefine the traditional text books. Thank you.

[@zoecoote3746]

Please keep an open mind and read the comment section. This persons idea of adhd is not accurate and is damaging. It is for people that have adhd like symptoms. Not actual adhd. He has no idea.

[@SilenceSilver]

On ADHD: Your broken bone analogy and addiction analogy is ridiculous. A broken bone is an injury that can heal. An addiction is a habit that can be broken. ADHD is a developmental condition. Just like dyslexia, autism etc, it is not something you can cure. You can form habits and take medication that can make life easier, but there is no getting rid of it. And your “losing your keys” point is also missing the point. Yes, everybody loses their keys at some point. But when you lose things chronically to the point of financial struggles, you’ve now got a problem. In simpler terms, we all pee, but when you pee 40 times a day, you might have a problem that needs checking. You make some fair points, such as the danger of overdiagnosing (though comparing US to EU is ridiculous - the UK has such abysmal mental healthcare that we’re seriously underdiagnosing patients) and wanting to push skills over pills is admirable. I think kids with ADHD should be pushed into high intensity physical hobbies to redirect their energy and use meds as a last resort. But overall your views are the narrow minded thoughts of somebody who has clearly never struggled with a disorder. I would never wish it upon you, but I would also ask that you refrain from commenting on things you can’t empathise with, fully understand, or have a expertise in. Writing a book on how to use post-it’s does not make you a psychiatrist, unfortunately.

[@ashleighwaters3261]

thank you, I totally agree, I'm so confused about how he's talking about ADHD like this without being a psychiatrist

[@nottomclancy2439]

100% - It's always some guy who doesn't have it themselves that talks about ADHD like "JUST FOCUS BRO!", "JUST FIX YOUR MORNING ROUTINE, BRO!", completely missing the fucking point about what it actually is. Thanks for typing that comment.

[@curiositydidntkillme]

Thanks for saying this. It gets so tiring correcting rude people like this man over and over. I do wish adhd on him and everyone else who pompously sits there saying things like “people make adhd an identity and that’s so dangerous!” What is dangerous is his attitude. I spent most of my life without a diagnosis but I always had adhd. Knowing what I have and why my brain works how it works, rather than like the NT people around me is such a huge relief! Attitudes like this man’s, attitudes I held against myself for my entire early life, almost costed me my life. His attitude is actually dangerous.

[@menamgamg]

Ive seen several videos like this on this channel now and to me it kinda seems like a deliberate effort to send a message about ADHD into the world because the discussion feels one sided. Feels disingenous and like some personal agenda. The host has said things that to me insinuates he basically doesn't believe in ADHD, i remember some episode where he brought up things based on his own life experience rather than science. To me there were always red flags with this guy but ive still enjoyed many of these episodes. Really starting to get a bad vibe from this channel now though.

[@justjen6330]

So agree! My son has very severe ADHD, and even with all of the self help tools and dietary changes in the world, without medication, he can't focus, and hyperactivity makes him extremely flighty and impulsive. Even now, at 14, he's still working to strengthen his executive functioning, practicing his organizational skills, and working on self control. Each of the 3 people in our home have some form of ADHD, so our house is very organized, and everything is very scheduled. And yet, we still have symptoms to deal with daily. 🤔 Go figure!

[@johnnyt.3101]

Wow! That's the first time in my life that I hear someone actually describing what a burnout is. HE IS SPOT ON! Most accurate definition I've ever heard. Having gone through a burnout myself, sometimes it felt like maybe I was the only human being who burned out for that reason... So happy to hear him define it as exactly what I've experienced. Unbelievable! This man knows his stuff!!

[@Born2BFly]

Language is so important. Dis - TRACTION. Vital conversation. Thank you 🙏🏾

[@R.E.A.L.I.T.Y]

Thanks for this very helpful interview. He’s a wonderfully compassionate & skillful guy. Great combo 🎉

[@tkataby73]

Wow!! What an amazing episode. I love his logic and how he says things that I think everyone innately knows is true. So happy I came across this. 😍

[@c.l.montoya2972]

My problem is I have too much going on; I often become overwhelmed when EVERYTHING is a priority. I put on my own oxygen mask first, so to speak, to the dismay of a few very important in my life. This podcast is very helpful❤️

[@flowmovementtherapy2096]

I loved his discussion of distraction, traction and action. I actually made this year's one word motto 'action' because I drilled down to everything I want in my life to require action in my chosen direction. It makes 'action' even more fitting!

[@fusionbim]

Excellent conversation, thanks to you both. 🙌 I'll have to listen to this a number of times.

[@sarahbyrne8501]

Breaks my heart to feel the enormity of loss of potential with undiagnosed adhd. Chaos and pain- only to be told- just focus. Jesus Christ…. Time blindness, … in ten minutes… What even is that when your disassociate self is in the ether, and you’ve missed the entire day. Please try to understand this leds to accusations of laziness, brutal abuse, and a life lost to shame and a sense of being an utter failure. Adult diagnoses are at an all time high- because it was missed in childhood. Bless you for your excellent podcasts tho’. ❤

[@TomBeardshaw]

I really wish you would interview someone who IS an expert in ADHD, like Russell Barkley. Gabor Mate is NOT an expert in ADHD… he’s never done any primary research into ADHD. This guy, too, is not an expert in ADHD. The global community incidence is estimated by WHO as about 5% of the population. So if the US has 10% diagnosed and Europe 1%, it’s obvious that the US may be over diagnosing and the Eu under diagnosing. “Skills before Pills” is an poorly informed slogan. They used to do this, and only prescribe if the Skills training was not working. In 80% of cases, it didn’t work. That’s why medication is a front line treatment… for a neuro chemical defecit. “Jumping straight to the pills” is the effective treatment based on 30-40 years research. It’s not that “not enough dopamine is produced”, it’s overactive dopamine transport cells, which remove the dopamine from the neuron synapses. “Undiagnosed plan” - What the hell is this guy in about - its a genetic lifelong disorder in 80% of cases. Just because this guy doesn’t believe it’s lifelong, doesn’t make it so. PLEASE GET BETTER INFORMATION STEPHEN. ASK A BLOODY EXPERT - ITS THE MOST RESEARCHED PSYCHIATRIC DISORDER THERE IS - ASK SOMEONE WHO KNOWS. PLEASE STOP GETTING NON-EXPERTS COMMENTING ON ADHD - YOU ARE SPREADING MISINFORMATION. Russell Barkley would be the best choice… look him up.