No Extroverted Feelings | Fi vs Fe | INTJ Perspective

Let's talk about our Fi feelings. I mean... let's not ACTUALLY talk about them....but let's talk about them conceptually.
Blog here: www.ithinkifee...
#INTJ #Fi #Fe

[@ninawillow2429]

Confession: At work, I fake laugh at stupid jokes so people don't ask me why I'm not laughing, which draws attention to me. It's not Fe. It's strategy.

[@sharonho6298]

Same, it's Ni predicting possible outcomes.

[@Himeko-wv7fu]

Yes lol

[@syedmazharhasan6803]

Amen.

[@dyrim3492]

Damn, so relatable.

[@nimisha6584]

Don't worry, INFJs do that too. A stupid joke is always stupid

[@thanhlytherapy]

Lol my dear ex is an INTJ and I'll always remember this event that perfectly shows the difference between Ni-Te and Ni-Fe: We were both finishing an assignment and his chair was blocking the way to the only microwave in the room. He decides to move his seat out of the way of the microwave as more people are entering the area. I then say to him, "Awh, that's so considerate of you to move your chair! So that the people can easily access the microwave." He then says, "I moved it, because I know they're going to go for the microwave and don't want to be bothered while I'm working." I couldn't help but to laugh at how blunt he was. I appreciate the honesty of INTJs 😂

[@az-nz1pn]

I had EXACTLY the same experience, BUT, the response I got was very very negative because she thought I was at first joking and when I explained that I wasn't she called me selfish and cold.

[@ninawillow2429]

Yes! I keep trying to understand Fe, but when I do things that seem nice, it's so that people won't bother me.

[@KerptacularGaming]

@@az-nz1pn Yeah. It's really easy to be misinterpreted when the exact thoughts and motives are explained.

[@annathepiper7964]

a z Fe users can be so irksome 😒😒.

[@itshans2075]

More like Ni-Fi 😂

[@kamiladjellal345]

I'm an intj and honestly I consciously. " React properly" I know when to laugh, I know when to act sad, I just learnt all of this from observing people and mimicking them so much that now it comes naturally. some people would never guess I am an actual INTJ. I don't really like it, but it comes in handy .

[@kamiladjellal345]

@@rayand9265 a psychopath with literally no emotions at all, can mimick them stuff. So can we then.

[@fbksfrank4]

@@rayand9265 it is a solution, nothing more.

[@pranaliks2459]

I recently remember having this conversation with my best friend. I told her that the only way I know how to react in situations appropriately is because I have specifically learnt it through movies/books/observations. And that I usually feel nothing when I'm responding to people. Most of the niceties I present are conditioned and intentional, not natural. She's an ENFP, and she found this very interesting and we ended up having a longer discussion about psychology and neuro divergent minds. Was great fun.

[@anneh851]

Same here, Kamila. It's what helped me get thru a lifetime of sales and customer service jobs. I do like it...because it works! :)

[@takeshisatou2371]

so basically being fake?

[@AlastorTheNPDemon]

*_Terminator_** smile intensifies*

[@InternetLiJo]

Lolol

[@FxFSolidSnake]

@@InternetLiJo Wow, you are so beautiful. Whomever is your significant other is, is really lucky!

[@robgoodsight6216]

hahahahahahah

[@cinthiagoch]

"Fe will smile, laugh or cry and express APPROPRIATE situational emotions based on the people and the world around them." Me, an INTP: That confirms it, my Fe is broken.

[@nateo200]

Never fear INTP friend the ENFJ is here to save you! Haha no seriously find an ENFJ or even an INFJ and just observe. A good mentor to me is an INTP and we have taught each other a lot!

[@kyurei4478]

An INFJ might be better to understand you because of higher Ti to relate more. They will most likely be a bit closer emotionally. An ENFJ will probably have a harder time relating to you because of their own weak Ti. Not necessarely obviously. But an experience will most likely be the most rewarding with polar opposite types.

[@PhotoRubio]

(INFP) Fi is my guy till I die. Why must it make me shy? By and by I try to Fe but it's not my slice of pie. It causes strife after time and back to my space I retreat, to the sanctuary behind my eyes. The cave of wonders of my life.

[@InternetLiJo]

That is some Fi/Ne at its prime, I can’t lie!

[@Irawry0u]

I love this!

[@seribelz]

ENFP here, I like INTJ's Fi, it is not smothering and gives me space to breathe and since it's not Fe I think I can relate to them emotionally I don't know how to explain, like we are in the same frequency but theirs isn't as loud. I also admire their higher stack Te.

[@InternetLiJo]

We admire the inverse in you! 🖤

[@dr.strangelove9815]

As an INTJ, I tend find Fe users extremely challenging to deal with at times, not because they are emotive, but due to their demand placed onto others of expressing themselves like they, the Fe users, do. If you're too quite and tend to listen more often without interrupting or emoting, I find the Fe user to get irritated, even if I tell them that I'm enjoying the conversation, with the courtesy: "I'm just quiet" added in just in case. For example. the other day I met with my relative's husband, he was talking for nearly 20 minutes and asked: "hey, I've been talking the entire time, someone show take over", I just kind of sat there and said "you're doing fine, no worries". Although I may not have the social gravitas of the Fe user's endless emotional temperature gauging of a situation, I have enjoyed Fi immensely in my life, it provides so much personal value to me in reflection.

[@InternetLiJo]

Yes! I can’t imagine not having my Fi. I love it so dearly. I’m very glad it’s my internal world.

[@janeofthejungle4]

I can appreciate this! I am one of the Fe users. With my INTJ son, I can see now that he’s all grown up, I actually did a pretty decent job raising him. I always accepted him for him. I never forced him to be someone he isn’t. I never tried to stop him from taking all of his things apart “just to see how they work” because I could tell it was a serious need for him. But most of all, I always treated him with dignity and respect regarding his emotions because I always knew he DOES have them. He shares with me in teeny tiny little doses. I suspect he keeps it short and sweet to try to avoid it turning into a full on deep emotional conversation. Our greatest connecting point is our freaky Ni and that has allowed for both of us to enjoy really whacky, out there, conversations that I know for sure I would never get to have if it weren’t for him being in my life and him trusting, loving and respecting me enough to allow me in. If the Fe users in your life can’t understand that you are how you are and accept you as you are, then maybe their Fe isn’t as well developed as they think it is.

[@NoraRoisin]

Another probable-Fe user answering. For me, possibly amplified by how I grew up, there was some fear that I was not considering other people's emotions. There was a lot of emotional blowing up at each other as a child, so I think I sort of need to know things are okay. Also, if someone was silent, it often was because they were angry and not willing to show it. So I grew to have a fear that I was overburdening everyone with my waffle and silence means 'I'm not interested.' I care a lot about people being interested in what I say, but I Do NOT want to annoy them with what I say. It's a struggle. But I intend to learn to grow out of this insecurity.

[@andreagreenwood93]

I feel the same way sometimes. I find its much easier with Fe users I'm close to though because they know me, so they know I'm not mad or unfriendly if I'm not as exhuberant as they are. It's harder with new ones, I feel the pressure, and it takes a lot of energy to mirror them. It's the only time I feel the cliche introvert "tiredness."

[@oberdelauney3340]

@@NoraRoisin L

[@djones2857]

So true about problem solving vs. emoting. I always tell my Fe friends and family that I'm not the person to turn to if they want help processing their emotions - but to call me when they want solutions. My mantra is "not my circus, not my monkeys" and I only offer suggestions if they ask. I used journaling to learn to get in touch with how I feel. Still don't always know in the moment and it takes me time later to understand and internally process and sort through what's going on. One excellent benefit to Fi is the ability to stay calm, focused, solution-oriented, and unemotional in a crisis. Great video as always.

[@InternetLiJo]

Thank you :)

[@sjane7229]

I avoid personal drama as much as possible, but I find the drama of others interesting. If you love to analyze and problem solve, and have an interest in psych and behavior, then it can be a fun knot to untangle. But I've learned to step back and not be the "man" who is always offering a solution, but rather offer empathy, support, and understanding- especially since I'm a woman. I can become frustrated though with all the emotion, when a person just needs to see a situation clearly, and make changes based on that.

[@dday9433]

I journal to find out what I'm actually feeling too. I also love analyzing emotions and psychology, but I'll avoid the extreme discomfort of talking about things deeply important to me, personally (my own goals in life, or whatever... that's not up for discussion )

[@rareaqqle]

Having parents with lead Fe is very annoying. They expect you to be open with your emotions all the time as if you owe them your emotions so they can feel comfortable. There was this weird moment with me and my mother, she asked me why I always hide how I feel. I was just sitting there contemplating as to why that was vital for her to pick up. It was such a weird moment. We would always get into arguments and she would get emotional but I would always try to find logical reasons why we're not agreeing. Most of the times its from stupid reasons she starts just so she would me rage, I don't even get emotional during arguments anyway. She really cannot control her emotions at all. One day, she tried killing all six of my fish but I saved them, twice. I couldn't understand why, I was just thinking so much about that moment and we just started arguing again for hours. That was when we were just being emotional and yelling at each other. I hate when people invites chaos to me, what she did was uncalled for. In her mind what she was doing wasn't wrong at all. Then a few days after I figured out she was jealous that I was giving them more attention than her. But I'm the least favorite child in the family anyway \(⊙⌣⊙)/

[@annathepiper7964]

no offense, but she sounds crazy.

[@rareaqqle]

@@annathepiper7964 I agree, I believe she has Bipolar Disorder as well. Her mood changes so much in a day, I think her disorder amplifies her Fe.

[@pamplora]

яareคqqle just a note : nobody controls emotions, but we can control our reaction to them.

[@blackoceancreativeuniverse]

this is all true- I speak as the INTJ son of an ISFJ dad and an INFJ mom. you just described half of my childhood, and some of my adult interactions with the. the struggle is real. your feelings must be drawn out, examined, and compared to "correct" Fe feelings. Fi loses each time!

[@rareaqqle]

@@blackoceancreativeuniverse After spending time with ISFJs and INFJs friends I don't really have a problem with them much, but there is still the Fe and Fi disconnection at times. Never arguments too wild. Lots of time to process helps me with understanding the reason behind Fe and Fi clashes a lot. What I've also notice is that it's not just the functions themselves but the order of the functions too. My mother is an ESFJ with the blindspot of Ni, and me having her blindspot too can get pretty irritating. I'd like to believe that every type would have it easy to get along but it seems like anyone with the blindspot of Ni can easily get irritated by me quiet often which includes ESTJs. they get pretty much mad and argumentative when you don't follow the exact process things should be done when at work places, it's worse when they're higher authority against you like a manager or boss. But wow ESFJs can be pretty crazy as parents, they remind me of that one stereotype of Hispanic households with their madre or albuelita cooking for the family all the time and if one person declines their meal they would get all crazy.

[@Encryptus1]

Feing is exausting. You are constantly gauging what to do and say and end up coming off as fake to other people. Unless it's small gestures...

[@InternetLiJo]

Yeah Fe feels so fake to me. I know it’s technically not though, all just perception.

[@Bookooky]

@@InternetLiJo Interesting - Fe users consider Fi users a bit immature (although yes, it is authentic) -ENFJ xx

[@AK-jt7kh]

Lin Yen Chin Lindsay is a student of OP Typology, not MBTI. Additionally, something that is unscientific is not necessary “fake”. Your feelings are unscientific. Are they fake? Anyways, OP typology actually is scientific. That’s the model Lindsay goes off of. Her work is based on a great deal of legitimate science. Just saying.

[@yxcjeje]

@@Bookooky "Selfish" is a term that's usually associated with Fi by Fe-users. It is a plethora of misunderstanding because what one side expects as normal behavior is seen as a weakness by the other: Conditionless niceness by Fi's vs. standing up just for oneself and not the others by Fe.

[@yxcjeje]

@@InternetLiJo Oh, it is a way of fake-ness, but with a purpose: Creating group harmony and trying to neutrally understand someone's position regardless of whether or not you like it are both awesome skills, as long as they don't drift into forced friendliness, inauthenticity and disregarding others' values. My own (!) opinion is that Fi > Fe. In my experience, Fe users too often end up in self-neglection, and I hate seeing this happening.

[@LexAnnalyn]

Talking about feelings conceptually is one of my favorite things. They're very interesting. Every time I think I've figured them out, they surprise me again. I cope with the unpleasant surprise by taking a "scientific" approach: observing, experimenting, tracking patterns. My mom leads with Fe (almost certain ESFJ). I had no chance, tertiary Fi or no. Emotions were talked about. Apologies were made to me when my feelings weren't hurt. (So much confusion-you did something? huh? Mom, I'm fine. I... forgive you? I guess? For saying something I didn't care about?) Pretty sure my dad has no Fe in his stack, but he's a therapist and very supportive of my mom. So... yeah. Some emotional competence, including looking out for others' feelings and sharing a few of my own, had to develop. I decided at one point that I didn't want to be close friends with any sweethearts like my mom, lest I break them. I ended up collecting a couple good IxFJ friends anyway. Still a little concerned I might hurt them, but I think our communication skills help with that. Also, the fact I like talking about feelings conceptually. Maybe more than the average INTJ. ^_^ I've often simulated Fe-largely through mimicking my parents-because I do value people, and I figure if I translate that into their language, through smiles and enthusiasm, they should get the message they're valuable. I call it Customer Service Mode, even when I use it at church or another non-work location. And then I do my best to avoid the people I meet in CS Mode in all other situations, because they get it in their heads that I'm an extrovert and maybe even their friend. Yeah... I'm working on other solutions besides full CS Mode, for my sanity. By my early teens, I'd learned to paste a small smile on my face during social gatherings, so no one would ask me if I was okay. (I get SO tired of that question. I'm very content in my corner, PLEASE don't worry about me.) I've been told that what feels like a small smile is often not perceived as a smile at all, so it must just upgrade my face from an apparent frown to a neutral expression. I'll take it.

[@andreagreenwood93]

I love analyzing feelings conceptually as well. As far as opening up, it's amazing how much easier it is to say to someone, "When this happened, it made me feel this way, for this reason," than it is to be expressive about it in real-time, in the moment. Although sometimes when you say you feel or felt a certain way but are un-emotive, people don't believe you 🙄. And interestingly I had the same situations with my Fe parent with the apologies. I really appreciated it though, because she taught me that it's important to apologize when you believe what you did was wrong, and not to be too proud.

[@hannapriskilla9815]

Wow, I relate to everything you said - from what you have picked up from you mother and almost making it look like you 'know how to Fe', to conceptualizing you feelings. My mother in an ESFJ as well, surrounded by all IxTJ's, so at least some of my family members can partly relate :)

[@ruthielalastor2209]

"I figure if I translate that into their language, through smiles and enthusiasm, they should get the message they're valuable." Lovely. It's absolutely about learning the language and breaking that barrier so you can understand each other better. This is so inspiring to read. And also yes, it truly helps to change the context of things if looking at it conceptually and approaching it scientifically is how it makes sense to you. Everyday is a lesson.

[@BlackSailPass_GuitarCovers]

"I've been told that what feels like a small smile is often not perceived as a smile at all, so it must just upgrade my face from an apparent frown to a neutral expression. I'll take it." Relatable lol.

[@NiTeNull]

In my experience, Fe is definetely one of the hardest functions to emulate or make up the lack thereof. For most of my life I was completely oblivious to the Fe interactions needed to make social encounters go much more smoother. It even led to many misunderstandings between me and my closer ones, family or friends. However, learning more about non-verbal communication and microexpressions in a more theoretical way, then actively trying to read people (with some experience. Ni can be very good at doing this), and then responding appropriately to those cues has helped. Make communication nuances a problem to decode and solve! I still struggle in some regards to this day though, since it requires from me a lot of attention and energy, and sometimes I'm simply too tired of interacting and want to retreat to my own room or space to work on my projects or relax. So the way I see it, we can't really just brute force Fe from inside us to make it work, but we can make up for it with some knowledge and practice that Ni and Te can excel at. Plus, if you Fi value the importance of self-growth and working on your weaknesses, the actual need for practicing these things and learning more will come naturally with time. I know it has helped me so far.

[@andreagreenwood93]

I think the Se function is actually the best at reading people and their reactions in real-time, even better than Fe- I think STPs and SFPs are even better at properly guaging reactions than Fe types. And seeing as how INTJs have inferior Se, we can definitely make use of that to some extent if we're well-rounded. I always feel like I'm ok at reading people and picking up on subtle cues, it's just knowing how to properly react is a few beats behind. That's specifically where Fe would be useful.

[@NiTeNull]

Andrea Greenwood I agree! My sister is an ESTP an she excels at noticing those details in people’s reaction to anything that may spark an answer in a social environment. Fe is more of a function that helps you connects and gauge the emotions and feelings of others. It’s less about the sensory cues and more about the “emotional temperature”. Inferior Se is known to combo well with Ni for picking up sensory details and interpreting them, so for us INTJ’s is more of a theoretical understanding of a someone’s reaction (provided you have the knowledge with you beforehand) rather than an innate reading of their feelings.

[@kyurei4478]

One of the best ways to learn it is probably to pay attention to people's reaction regarding what you say. And try to say things in different ways to obtain different results. When you understand that you can partially influence the mood of someone depending on what you're going to say and how you say it, you basically understood the basics of the Fe system.

[@Sam-ng3of]

I found it pretty easy to develop through observation and trial and error. It's everywhere. Just look around you.

[@claudialuvsu21]

I’m an ENTJ and I can definitely relate to not knowing your emotions at the moment you’re supposed to feel them. I usually go through life with an emotional disconnection, not saying I’m emotionless because I am DEFINITELY not, but when I’m experiencing current situations I do so with a logical attitude. So when someone asks me how I feel about a situation I usually respond with “I don’t know” 😂

[@adr58]

Fe: ''Alright guys were all going to have fun, woohoo :D :D :D :D !!!'' Fi: ''Who's this annoying individual I had the displeasure to have encountered''

[@elizardw4900]

Oh my GOD, their compulsive "WOOHOO"-ing functions as an immediate alarm bell to me: flee the scene now lest I be drained of all energy.

[@joshuamichael4312]

People have always thought I was full of myself or snobby, even unapproachable. I never understood because that's definitely not how I felt inside, so I chalked it up to jealousy on their part. Well now I'm finding out it was me all along as an INTJ hahah. I don't express normal people emotions so it comes across snobby or cold. Traversing this world as an INTJ is definitely challenging!

[@sjane7229]

Intuitively understand what someone is going through, then exercise cerebral empathy: know what the situation calls for and act accordingly. When I used to confide to friends that I had a cold heart, they always said: you are the most empathic person I know. I thought I was a sociopath. Lol.

[@andreagreenwood93]

Yes I relate to this so much! Sometimes I can't feel what someone feels, but I imagine, how would I feel if it was me? The hardest part is the "act accordingly," because sometimes what I would find comforting or the help I would want is not what the other person wants. And yeah there are certain helpful "rules" to follow, but I don't want to just follow rules, I want to be genuine.

[@sjane7229]

Andrea Greenwood After being exposed to so many mean spirited people online- seeing how so many people really think, I find it bewildering that INTJs are seen as so mean. Now I believe that bothering to intuitively and/or intellectually grasp where someone else is at is more empathic than maybe most people are willing, or able to be. We may not always get it right, but trying and caring carries a lot of weight.

[@fikonfraktare]

"Empathy means experiencing someone else's feelings. ... ' It requires an emotional component of really feeling what the other person is feeling. Sympathy, on the other hand, means understanding someone else's suffering."

[@eayllon1]

3:53 "Not my chair, not my problem" 😂

[@Tristen501]

I'm really glad you made this video! As an INFJ y'alls Fi is like nails on a chalk board to my soul. I literally feel pain when I hear y'all's opinions of people and things. Thinking to myself "can they hear what they're saying, and how hurtful they sound?" The pill is made easier to swallow knowing that y'all don't do it out of spite but rather honesty. Still stings my soul though. Lastly, I acknowledged not all INTJ's are like this, I might only know one other than you but I've spent a lot of time with them. Maybe the one I know is more immature, idk. INTJ + INFJ is not an easy pairing, they definitely have to cross a language barrier.

[@anissbenarrioua2631]

I never like and subscribe. But I did this time. I loved this video, it feels as if I am talking. I enjoyed the little comments that you included. Well-done ! INTJ-A

[@InternetLiJo]

Awesome, welcome! You have found the others 👽

[@shou3570]

Maybe I should send this video to anyone who asks me "why are you so quiet?". Great explanation!

[@InternetLiJo]

Haha do it!

[@elmoomle4565]

Great explanation! And, that's why people always call me a 'cold fish' in that I don't externally show 'empathy' towards other people's 'situations'...

[@InternetLiJo]

Hahahah a cold fish 🐟 😂

[@fbksfrank4]

Lol 😆, I know, "That Sucks" is such a small shoulder to cry on.

[@allysonedwards6549]

Sorry for the long post. As an ISFP, I have found that I've really grown from being close friends with an INTJ. (And other Ni users in General). Experience- I grew up in a house with a lot of Ne users and I found it really difficult to come up with valid reasons for my actions since my actions were based off of introverted feeling, my observations through my Extroverted Sensing, and my spikes of introverted intuition. Outcome of experience- I feel a need to rationalize my internal feelings but it's difficult to explain to others why I do what I do based off of how I interact with the world. I'm so grateful for my INTJ friend (who is one of the most logically sound people I know) for being willing to see my logic separate from my emotions. I know there are a lot of stereotypes of my personality type being aloof or just seeming illogical but I think it could be that our logic is most often expressed through our Se and I personally prefer to use the observatory use of that function. (or make art) I appreciate that I do not ever feel manipulated by an INTJ because it seems like their goal is to manipulate the situation into their favor rather than the person and their attempts to make others feel comfortable show a lot of genuine care for the people around them.

[@boogieap3617]

What is your enneagram?

[@andreaELmeyer]

Also, when I am walking around at work, occasionally I will have this inner dialogue with myself and I will inwardly crack a joke which the rest of me finds hilarious. At that point I start grinning like an idiot and most people wonder what the hell just happened when they see me doing this. I can't help it though. When I am inwardly talking to myself, I'm frigging hilarious.

[@danniporter6484]

This makes so much sense. My mom is Fe and sometimes gets so frustrated when she asks me what I am feeling and I just don't know, at least not until much later sometimes weeks or months later. Usually by that time the emotions aren't really relevant anymore so I end up just never expressing them.

[@InternetLiJo]

Right? Fi just doesn't vibe the same way!

[@aubreys1675]

“If you’re confused about our emotions, so are we” 😂😂

[@atomnous]

this is the most apparent and consistent distinction. emotional impact vs just enjoying... well I can't describe Fi well but I know Fe vs non-Fe very easily.

[@BekiTMBTI]

This is a very good video. It’s so refreshing to see an fi user talk about challenges when dealing with fe doms. I work in an environment dominated by fe users. It’s at times really annoying especially when they say “are you okaaaaayyy?” In a very patronizing, condescending tone. Oh but they mean well. Oh those darn Fe doms. Aren’t the something. Life I feel is easier for them because people treat fi users with disdain most of the time. And adjusting to a work environment with mostly fes is very very stressful. And I would often worry about saying the wrong thing. And it feels like you’re stepping on landmines.

[@solgast]

Alot of insight and can greatly relate to most things here. - ENFP

[@mamu7976]

Fe is like Mount Everest for INTJs. Something that is important, but extremely difficult to learn. I'll keep climbing and trying to learn the Fe skill though. Yet that shell on the ocean floor, seems so comforting! LOL!

[@forKyrene]

I'm in the process of understanding my Fi. Sometimes, I find myself in a place where all the people were just laughing and having fun while I sit in a corner thinking "I feel numb. Why do I feel numb? I want to laugh with them and have fun with them but I can't find a reason to (superior Te). Why don't I feel the same way they feel?". Now I know it's because I don't value the same values they have. I had to engage a lot of Te in my day-to-day dealings with Muggles.

[@cavaridrodid0924]

3:30 happened to me when my father (ENTJ) died. We were really close and I watched him die. It was painful for ages but for the first three days I wasn't able to feel anything, my mind was completely numb and all I could think of was "ok, now I have to do this, this and this", "I have to call this person, then call x, then send an email to y", "I have to pick this, drop that", "check on your mother, how is she doing? check on my aunt, check on my siblings." "Don't forget to call the lawyer and". It was until 3 days later, when I had nothing left to do that I started to realize what I was actually living. It was so bizarre at first because I knew I was supposed to be devastated as everybody else... I just wasn't, I was on a mission.

[@empathyisonlyhuman7816]

I watched an excellent video a few weeks ago concerning the differences between introverts and extroverts. The premise was that introversion develops in people who have a overt sensitivity to acetylcholine, while most extroverts do not. Acetylcholine is a reward endorphin and is much more closely tied to memory than dopamine. This being the case any time an introvert needs a bit of a pick me up they can turn to their memories whereas extroverts need to turn to socializations. And since acetylcholine will also produce dopamine, on top of it's own processes, this can lead to an overload of dopamine which is why introverts can oftentimes feel overwhelmed in large social gatherings whereas the extrovert is in it to win it until the party's over. So when you couple this dynamic with Te and Ni, our (INTJs) Fi function is not surprisingly a bit of a wilting wallflower. It tends to be a highly underutilized portion of the INTJs personality. And so when we encounter people with narcissistic, psychopathic, histrionic, or borderline personality traits, It's akin to feeding time at the zoo. And no it's not the INTJs who are doing the predation (usually anyways). And so to every INTJ out there I offer this warning. When you encounter an individual that you find doesn't make sense (when normally everybodies motives are clear), who you feel ill at ease, angry, frustrated, etc, around. Do yourself a big favor and and don't do what we will naturally try to do which is to try and figure them out, instead take it as a warning sign that this person will hurt you emotionally, physically, and or psychologically, and run away as fast as your tootsies will carry you. If your unsure about this, or just can't seem to wrap your head around their actions, try this. Look at what they do through the lens of they are trying to cause stress, emotional upset, et cetera. For me, that one was a huge eye opener about a family member. As soon as I did so, 20 years of what seemed like really weird choices suddenly became clear tactical motivations. Incidentally, these predators tend to find INTJs some of the most tasty treats around. Because they admire our intellect. And revel in how easy it can be to ruffle our feathers once they know how. Anyways, enough with all the negativity. Ciao for now, and I hope your day treats you well.

[@ramonaflowrx]

wow mind to drop a link to the video?

[@empathyisonlyhuman7816]

@@ramonaflowrx I'm sorry I watched that video a couple years ago. I don't recall where to find it. Otherwise I'd be happy to share it with you.

[@pamplora]

I’m a Fe user and my sister is a Fi user and I can get frustrated because she sometimes doesn’t pay attention to other’s feeling as much as I do, which can make her look like she is self centred even if I know she is not selfish

[@InternetLiJo]

Yes!! That is a great Fi explanation from an Fe user.

[@pamplora]

LiJo :)

[@RaidenShogun..]

I like the purple Color theme in your video. It’s so aesthetically pleasing! And my pfp is purple too!!!

[@InternetLiJo]

yeee!

[@ninadiener9806]

Perfectly explained, as usual! I try to Fe at times too, but it's incredibly hard and tiring, I have to use Te to do it and a sort of hybrid comes out instead most of the time; I guess it takes practice

[@InternetLiJo]

It does take practice 😬

[@snuffles1469]

I was once told, 'I get that you rationally understand what happened, but how do you actually feel?', and I didn't know how to answer. The best I could do was use evidence from my observable behavior as an indication of how I probably felt. -INTJ

[@InternetLiJo]

I HAVE LITERALLY HAD SOMEONE TELL ME THE SAME THING 🤯

[@soulsilver8]

Thanks for explaining Fe and Fi in a way that actually makes sense. Instead of the many articles that gave unclear and overlapping info

[@InternetLiJo]

IM SO GLAD IT MADE SENSE 🙌🏼✨

[@oodlesofnoodles4660]

Ah, so this is the root cause of that singularly redundant question, "why are you so quiet?".

[@InternetLiJo]

Yes as it relates to the feels

[@wongawonga1000]

Personally speaking, I find being an INTJ the most lonely experience imaginable. When I talk to people, I may as well be conversing with a computer since, unless the conversation is of intellectual interest, I feel absolutely nothing. Instead I have to fake emotions. I've been to the funerals of two close relatives and felt absolutely nothing at each. It was just another day for me. I've never been close to anyone in my life. @LiJo says this is OK but, at the age of 46, I don't think there is anything OK about it. It's terrible and there is nothing that can be done about it. As to the insights gained through Ni, what use are they? If I discuss them with people I get a blank look back. I've never received a thought provoking insightful reply in return. Conversations for me are just about trying to extract information out of others.

[@InternetLiJo]

It is really lonely. I’ve just accepted that it will always feel that way.

[@alephgates7519]

These are educational to me. I have often been told about my flat affect and other traits, but watching other INTJ's on youtube - it's so nice to be able to see similar traits externally. I am exhausted at work and these are reassuring me that it is more likely architectural rather than me ruining my mood with bad interior decorating choices.

[@N0B0DY_SP3C14L]

Your smile and your laugh are so beautiful when the rest of us are lucky enough to see them off-leash.

[@InternetLiJo]

Lol thank you!

[@daveofallpeople]

You were spot on here! I’ve been digging into this for a while trying to understand the Fi side of things and this really cleared things up for me. Thanks a bunch!

[@InternetLiJo]

Awesome!! That means a lot coming from an ISTP :)

[@pedrodias5166]

As an ENFP, I really am agreeing so hard with this. Specially because sometimes I can be percieved as not affectionate only because I don't express it very outwardly. But at the same time, extroverted feeling (from my experience) makes people act in a way that's likeable to most people who are close to them, which could be good. Making other people happy should be good. But the problem here is that sometimes they can do this at any cost, and that is pretending that negative feelings or misunderstandings don't exist. If they act "less good", and you feel hurt by it and share your feelings, they can very easily make you feel like it is all in your head, and quickly put everything under the rug to move on and find their "happy tingly feelings". Even if under the rug it is slowly rotting. And as an FI, I work internally but I have no problems being open and expressing it, yes I do base myself and try to improve on my values, on reflection, responsability... but I personally have no problems with transparency and communicating my needs to others, I rather be open when i feel hurt by something than just ruminate over it like an idiot. But extroverted feeling is not always open to this, because it can be a threat to their positivity, even when you're just sharing your feelings, not necessarily putting the responsability or blame on them. They often don't like conflict, so they pretend everything is fine all the time, toxic positivity is what I feel from some of those who have this as a primary function... :( sorry. Extroverted feeling can also work in a lack of self awareness and reflection due to the focus on pleasing others. which is a bit ironic, I do understand that in the other hand, introverted feeling can work in lack of awareness of the outside world and others emotions.

[@pedrodias5166]

FI doesn't mean we can't communicate openly, it means we value feelings through self reflection, ethical questions, responsability, self awareness.

[@davidperfette1425]

Awesome job! I'm really enjoying your videos. I'm an INFJ with an insatiable need to know! You typically illuminate a lot of stuff for me that leads to some serious understanding and often a relearning of things, too! I'm one of those people whose guilty of imposing my Fe on others, pressuring them to respond in certain Fe way. With your type, I have been particularly bad. I always imagined that by being so forward I was communicating that I'm not a threat, and that I'm warm and receptive to that INTJ, TP, or similar type. That flat affect from those types I usually took as indifference towards me, disapproval, dislike, etc. There's actually a whole lot that I took away from this video, as well. Learned a bunch of things and it provided a bunch of missing puzzle pieces for other things! I know this is a little off-topic but while watching I was reminded of the video you did about your struggle with comforting a grieving friend or acquaintance. I'm pretty sure it was you, though I couldn't find the video. If not, I apologize. What you said here really makes sense of that struggle - why it could feel like it was beyond your ability. You talked about being at a complete loss. You couldn't do anything and I think you felt like a failure for that. Or, something to this effect. According to what you describe here, in those situations, when confronted with an obviously emotional, grieving friend, what appears to make it so overwhelming for the INTJ is that you recognize an obligation to express emotions according to the needs of the outside world but your Fi can't simply defer to Te, to resolve it. The INTJ can neither run from it nor fix it. No matter what you do you can't undo someone's loss and neither would it be appropriate to start matter-of-factly advising the emotional, grieving friend on the available resources for them to best address their pain. That would show a complete lack of empathy, a complete failure to express appropriate situational emotion. So, shy little Fe is forced to center stage under the spotlight, all by itself. The INTJ who hasn't previously found an acceptable strategy to deal with these situations would naturally feel overwhelmed. As i said, it's a little off-topic but I thought I had an interesting observation that might be helpful, and that I thought would be interesting to get your thoughts on if you feel like commenting.

[@fyn1985]

I am so pleased to find an INTJ channel. Thank you for these resources. I'm ashamed to say that I have occasionally fixed a smile on my face or laughed awkwardly when my NI and TE decide it can diffuse tension. I think it makes things even more uncomfortable because the FE on the receiving end can pick up on the insincerity immediately. The older I get, the more comfortable I am to just be and trust that people often read me better than I can express myself. I don't need to prove that I am not cold.

[@InternetLiJo]

Welcome, glad you made it here :)

[@fyn1985]

@@InternetLiJo Thanks for the welcome, even though I commented on a year-old video. I haven't been on KZbin for anything more than music recently so I look forward to going through your library while I finish some design projects.

[@marcgoodman4561]

I love being an INTJ, I love my Aspergers. :-)

[@divergent_foxx]

Same🖖🤘

[@jamesd6785]

"Am I happy now??? I don't know..." And here I thought it was just me.

[@benjaminjohnson8845]

Sands of time Drifting on the ocean floor. Someone's home Just cant find the door. I run to heaven My legs are sore. Seeking keys To the one that I adore. Back down to Earth To the watery abyss, At this depth Tropical storms are just a mist. Currents moving Like the hands of clocks, Drowning me With things I've missed. No more light at 656 Only shadows as I sink, Eyes closed Makes it easy to think. I tune my ears So I can hear The rhythm of your heart, The beat of a dancing river. Fresh water leading us home Through the salty sea, Back to were we belong, Together you and me. I love you. Benjamin :)

[@InternetLiJo]

I love this and you, thank you

[@valerievaughn5495]

This is so me! Super job on explaining Fi. Wow! I’m not alone! Thanks for sharing!❤️ You know, right, if I’m sharing that means I really mean it. LOL!

[@InternetLiJo]

You're not alone! I'm so glad it hit home for you Valerie.

[@kelvingivens1629]

She has so many emotions wanting to come out. They sit just below the surface

[@Tristen501]

(INFJ here with a question) INTJ's Fi is a difficult language to understand but at the thought of dating an INTJ I saw the relationship as a strength. That we would balance between the Fi -Fe. I know there's times I could use Fi in my life but I'm borderline incapable of using it. I could provide Fe in the relationship when I saw it was needed. What are y'all's thoughts? My opinion is that y'all view Fe as inferior and don't have a drive to utilize it even if available. I'm curious what y'all have to say.

[@Tristen501]

@@Gsscvgggfdertfffhhjiuytdsss this warms my heart so much to hear! Thank you so much for your reply, it really helped.

[@drinkmewonder7536]

Great video! Very well explained by yourself, and I’ll definitely be checking out more videos. I am so interested by hearing perspectives from the different types. So I type as INFP and have Fi as a lead. I’d say I do know what I’m feeling, what I like/dislike, but I’m not really expressive about this and understand where you come from about Fi being a inner personal world. I admire Fe users so much though I’m learning to accept that they’re Fe-ing is just not me, and that’s fine too :)

[@troywesterbur706]

An Fe can also really bring down the room. The old saying if they aren't happy then no one is happy.

[@sjane7229]

When I was a lot younger I also often didn't know what I was feeling. Then I learned how to. Now I don't care!!!

[@InternetLiJo]

That’s a great progression!

[@sjane7229]

LiJo Or well developed avoidance LOL.

[@RoyalpandaG]

I am an INFJ with an INTJ Best friend... He acts as my sound board, when i am overwhelmed by Fe... And then, gives me logical advice... I love it...

[@michaelh9096]

Thank you. This makes a lot of sense. Very helpful and easy to take in.

[@TheMcMatey]

I became a fan awhile ago, today was great for anchoring my pysche because I feel great listening to you to help remind me of my control over my life. Normally i would consume alcohol to the point oblivion, this did not happen. I spent the last few weeks watching your content and it helped inspired me to make it to the new year and continue my push to be healthier mentally and physically. Please keep up the great videos and for suggestion i'd recommend a video that outlines your entire year plan for 2020

[@TheMcMatey]

also feel free ask questions about me, I'm more than happy to answer them

[@InternetLiJo]

This was the best New Years message I received. Thank you so much.

[@speedy_comet]

I can't imagine having the feeling function as the inferior function like ENTJs for example...

[@andreaELmeyer]

Female INTJ here. I do Private Security and a lot of people there think I'm very rigid and emotionless. This is true even when I feel a whole bunch. And people do tell me to smile. Fortunately being a private security guard doesn't require me to be overly gregarious(just polite). But when people do see me they think I either hate them or I'm angry or whatever. This "resting bitch face" or whatever you want to call it. I always have it. It served me well when I was active duty in the military. For that, my expression served me perfectly. But now that I am in the civilian world it can make it so hard to explain my feelings to people when I don't express them "normally"/outwardly the way most do. I've learned over the years how to express myself when I really want to. But sometimes the expectations that I will "be" a certain way in general and as a woman can be such a pain in my ass.

[@Diaming787]

There are social situations that I have to fake Fe because I don't want to deal with the conflict. If I Fi at them, they would think I'm a sociopath. What a stupid mentality people have.

[@InternetLiJo]

Yeahhh I feel that😉

[@TheLategates]

The 'sad' thing about Fe is that sometimes it will be smiling when they feel sad or terrible inside, all to keep the external vibe going. It can suck to feel responsible for the outside vibe when inside you feel terrible.

[@oscarl.3563]

I type D-Fe and I don't consider myself as someone who laughs or smiles _to make other people happy_ but I may smile because they're in a good mood. Even if I don't think it's funny I'm just happy that they are enjoying themselves and maybe I feel their joy too. Perhaps it radiates off them! Then how could I not be happy seeing them like that? I enjoy creation, really, as it unfolds before me. There is so much to make me feel good. The atmosphere is important, a bad atmosphere is destructive. I don't think that it happens much but sometimes I laugh because other people are laughing and they pull me in.

[@xavierpacheco7297]

Thank you for that explanation. I very much relate being an intj myself, though it's rare that I don't know what I am feeling. I suppose some people would consider us to be self-centered. This of course is not true because intjs are indeed concerned about the world/people around them. We just approach that world with solutions not feelings.

[@tombain5665]

Hi Lindsey. Great video explanation. I don't see Fe as a "tool" to sharpen or use. Or Fi for that matter. But I do think a real appreciation of your default style and educating your close friendships of that style is essential. Just lost a promising lady ENFP Fi because of our differences in emotional processing and feeling. I'm INFJ Fe. I had great difficulty with an apparent self absorbed style and not sensing their lack of empathy in any given social situation or dynamic in the "room" as you put it. Really liked the lady but failed to read her with any understanding. Thanks to your videos I have learnt such a lot. Thank you for your courage in sharing your stuff. It helps a lot. Cheers

[@paulswinford3325]

Am I sad? Am I happy? ...I don’t know??” I relate to this all to deeply. Also consciously trying to use Fe wears me out.. I can keep it up in short burst and it never feels legitimate. My Infj friend usually is the one I think brings out my tertiary Fi most often in conversation with it feeling natural. which makes sense with their Ni-Fe and me being Ni Dominant as well.

[@sjane7229]

Avoid all feelings as much as possible. Dismiss them as irrelevant, or not worth investing the time/energy, or stuff them deep. Do not engage with people or activities things that will result in having to deal with unwanted feelings. Reject sentimentality. It's like clutter, keep it minimal.

[@InternetLiJo]

Hahah while I did agree with that at one time, I’ve come to see that balance gives optimal leverage in life. That’s what I’m personally going after.

[@sjane7229]

LiJo I hear you. It’s definitely healthier to acknowledge the feelings and accept them!

[@bridgebum826]

A lot of the things I say in social situations are stolen from books, movies, and TV shows. My thinking is that I saw them work there so they should work in "real life." It makes interacting with people so much less taxing when I don't have to come up with small talk on my own.

[@InternetLiJo]

Great hack for making it work according to the energy you want to expend!

[@captaindave7945]

Well that clears some things up. I often wondered why I didn't know how I felt about some things. Nice to know that it's normal not to always know.

[@deepkfiz7121]

6:09-6:10 : your emotion just expressed itself with the breaking of your voice :)

[@InternetLiJo]

Yeeee

[@srulyp.7428]

I think it's more complicated 2 figure out how Fe feels, cuz we don't display our feelings, if it's not appropriate.

[@InternetLiJo]

Yes in that way it is more complicated!

[@pamplora]

sruly p. As an ENFJ, I lead with Fe, it feels like emotions are contagious, if someone cries, I cry. Or I just imagine what it feels like.

[@ALKMST]

Finding your channel and typology in general has really made a lot of things in my life make a lot more sense. I watch some of your videos and it’s almost like hearing my own thoughts which isn’t really something I’m used to. So thanks for that. It’s good to know we’re not alone sometimes.

[@InternetLiJo]

That’s the experience I had as well with type. I’m so glad you made it here :)

[@fredsas12]

"Fe"ing. Impressive and I totally got that :)

[@InternetLiJo]

Hahah I try. “Try”

[@nuzhattasnim5336]

"random muggles" haha love her!! INTJ-T here! Can you make a video on INTJ-A and INTJ-T

[@InternetLiJo]

Thank you! I could probably do something around that or similar :)

[@printedprops8730]

Just last night my friend's boyfriend died in hospital. I was on the phone with her just a few hours ago. My first instinct was how to fix the situation, but i know she called for emotional support. As an INTJ guy it was obviously a little awkward. I said "sorry to hear that, hopefully your family will support you in these times" etc. I also decided to talk about the good times we had in the past, to hopefully give her mind a break from the loss. She said it was a good chat so all is good. My brain just freeze up I dont know what to say :/ What else should i do?

[@InternetLiJo]

Nice with bringing up good memories. Say that YOU are there if she needs anything. Let her know it’s ok to process what happened while sharing space with you. Sometimes people need to grieve but they just don’t want to be alone. It really requires you to do very little bit just be and not run away. (Yes it’s hard for me too, but it’s what works in the situation)

[@InternetLiJo]

Nice with bringing up good memories. Say that YOU are there if she needs anything. Let her know it’s ok to process what happened while sharing space with you. Sometimes people need to grieve but they just don’t want to be alone. It really requires you to do very little bit just be and not run away. (Yes it’s hard for me too, but it’s what works in the situation)

[@printedprops8730]

@@InternetLiJo yeah I texted her after that we can talk anytime. Thanks for the advice!

[@MEhatersLove]

Te is hammering. Fi is so random. Hahahhaha good luck with this world.

[@InternetLiJo]

I’m doing it!

[@ErykThompson]

As an INFJ, I feel for you...

[@InternetLiJo]

Did my Fe perspective make sense?

[@ErykThompson]

LiJo Yes! Fe can take charge of the emotional temperature of the room. It also can influence the tribe to feel a wide range of emotions, not just happy (think Henry Rollins or Trump). Also hit the nail on the head with how you described demon Fi 👌🏼

[@InternetLiJo]

Eryk Thompson my M-Te thanks you for the tribe validation lol

[@josephkozak2113]

Dominant Fi often sucks

[@mallorywinchester5548]

I have very low feeling in general and I still give courtesy chuckles on occasion. If I like the person

[@tier786]

Just the other day I was wanting to find a video on this! Thank you for the video:)

[@ChaceBonanno]

Happy New Year Lindsay!

[@fermio]

After 3:17. I can absolutely relate. I usually tell people I have two general moods. The first being "I'm okay" and the second being "I'm not okay". It takes me a solid minute to realize when I've switched from the first to the second, and about two more to identify what particular emotion I am indeed feeling and what caused it.

[@InternetLiJo]

Yes that’s how I experience it often as well

[@fermio]

@@InternetLiJo the struggle is very real 😂

[@SedulousScientist]

I require assistance. Question: When others joke around/speak to me, I do a short laugh (approximately 95% of the time) as I am unaware of how to respond/act. I possess an intense desire to discover the intricacies of my personality, aim to avoid arguments (unless family members are involved), do not openly state my beliefs as I prefer to keep them private (as they can be used against me in future situations). Regarding my decision-making process, I have two. Process #1 - For myself (not affecting others) I use pros and cons lists, research, and seek input from others - aiming to completely remove emotional biases and personal desire. Process #2 - General (affects me and/or others) I blend pros and cons, research, and input from others with understanding (difficulties they have faced in their life, how a personal affects them, etc). I am aware this response was quite lengthy. However, I aimed to provide as much nuance as possible (for accuracy).

[@tgs5725]

Not my chair not my problem, that's what i say.... memories

[@armcfaddful]

the word is Content. as long as I am content, there is no sad and all will proceed as planned.

[@InternetLiJo]

Yep!

[@pinkbanana1276]

As an intj, I’m really in touch with my Fi.

[@carmenm8521]

and I want to make a suggestion, I find you are the one to do it: have you ever seen Heidi Priebe's sketches? she makes a wonderful job playing ENFP's internal dynamics. And it is not only funny (of course I have laughed at myself a lot) it has been suuuper enlightening. Have you ever thought about doing something like that for INTJ's? My boyfriend is, as a good INTJ element, successful and compliant, gives this image of perfect control in his life but struggles with empathy and anxiety and of course, he is trying to be a better personand tells me that he would like to understand more about his inner feeling world. Also, have an INTJ's female friend that has decided to declare herself as asexual but confesses that she is curious but afraid of that feeling world and struggles with anxiety and depression. In the end, you INTJ's speak about your feelings and are indeed curious, you are vulnerable tender human beings :3. All this to say that your inner world is super interesting and we want sketches :P (my Ne-dom text XD)

[@adolfohernandez3606]

Hearing about Fi, it seems so normal to me.

[@gdtownshende]

My ex, who was definitely Fe, constantly misinterpreted my facial expressions. Her: Why are you frowning? Me: I'm not. I'm concentrating. I was actually confused why she would even ask such a thing.

[@user-be3hh5pp4i]

With Fi being my first function I know how I feel in every situation though occasionally I don't understand why I am feeling a certain way. But I do ponder that on my own first and for a good amount of time. After that, if I still can't figure it out, I'll discuss it with a trusted family member or friend. There are probably 2 people in my life who actually hear my deeper Fi.

[@rjaybgmz]

i really thought i have lesser empathy than an average person. i hope i understand all of the things talked in this video better. - intj

[@SaraHovera]

As an INTJ -Fi tert with a ESTP bf - Fe tert, I relate this a lot. He uses Fe in a kinda negative way to second-guess/conjecture other people's intentions/opinions whereas I always think as he's overthinking. (I don't know who's right lol). In his opinion I tend to bluntly/harshly say something that hurts others' feelings (due to lack of social gatherings perhaps), and the point is, I never felt anything wrong (I would still debate if this is true lol. I think both of our Fs are immature.)

[@SOULJAJOE010]

Hi LiJo, happy holidays!

[@InternetLiJo]

Joseph thanks and back at you!

[@marshallrobinson1019]

So, if I'm an emotional stone and everyday feel like people are trying to wring water from me, but at the same time, I occasionally find situations hysterical (I have to explain the observation) or start crying watching a stupid anime (I can't explain how deeply I'm moved) then am I just emotionally constipated? I often know punchlines or anecdote results before I'm told.

[@chrisgarrett3395]

Well, personally I found the best way to fit in is to be the one that sets the mood. If you're particularly clever and quick witted, you can play the jester. You don't have to be the clown, but you can poke fun at things people say and think that aren't particularly well considered. Using your pool of knowledge to influence others into making social situations easier for you to handle can be a useful tool to stow away for times when you need it. It's exhausting, but it can be a fun game to play when you need to rehearse your social skills. That beings said, I really never enjoy using this strategy because I only employ my own brand of humor. If you don't like what I find funny, it creates a situation where you become excluded like I would've been had I not strong armed the social climate from you. You either learn to accept that you're the odd one out or you develope a taste for villainy.

[@neilshepherd1904]

I guess the best way I can express my appreciation for this video, is clicking the thumbs up. I'd click it more if I could. Peace.

[@InternetLiJo]

Thanks so much Neil! Do you have Fi or Fe?

[@neilshepherd1904]

@@InternetLiJo Hi. It's Fi with (almost) no deviation. Can't pretend to emote; externally it either happens 'organically' or not at all. I love dogs. I learned a lot about dog language and psychology, and behaviour and R+ training, and history. They're all individual but not complex creatures and they behave logically. Peace and Happy New Year.

[@awilson8521]

My Savior Fi has to share my feelings and values all the time. My default is: "You're not going to get away with not knowing you made me feel that way."

[@mariabelunolli9406]

When I was a young girl and teenager, I had a list of emotions I could feel and quite a detailed one. Each Saturday I would take time to go through my feelings, search for them, try to understand and check on the list how it was affecting me (amazing / ok / could be better / awful / absolutely awful). Otherwise, they would spend the week quietly affecting me (for good or bad) without me even knowing why. And I couldn't take it.

[@InternetLiJo]

Interesting so you developed your own processing style!

[@mariabelunolli9406]

@@InternetLiJo Excatly. Nowadays, with experience it's better :) Thank you for your videos!

[@arianotes6238]

I think Fe users tend to undermine their own feelings because they don't perceive it to be as important as the feelings of those around them. It's not that they don't value themselves or their own emotions. Rather they empathize and feed off the emotional energy of those around them. It's like your happy then I'm happy situation. This I think is more obvious the higher Fe is in the function stack. Fe is always trying to read the mood afraid of offending others. Fe in my opinion doesn't do well when it comes to personal opinions. Since Fe is attached to Ti, Fe users tend to gravitate towards the "objectively correct opinion". So asking Fe users how they personally feel about something might get awkward since personal opinions are not a priority for them. Anyways great vid. I love your insights on Fi. I'm a little jealous on how independent it is when it comes to personal values. Since Fe can be crippling when you think other people are judging you. Fi on the other hand isn't as affected and Fi users always seem so sure when it comes to their own convictions.

[@user-el6my6vi7p]

Fe inf (or 4th, whatever anyone calls it) is just being blind to your own moodiness lol. Like, I wanna be kept in the loop but it’s hard if the response isn’t something my thought process agrees with. Other people’s emotions aren’t something the IxTPs naturally feel responsible of but somehow we‘re still affected. I’m not very good at it but I can still “read the room” and feel very conscious of screwing stuff up. Idk if this goes for other IxTPs or IxxPs in general but it’s why I tend to latch onto only one person at a time at social gatherings and end up having thoughtful discussions. (Because at least I could possibly build rapport with one person. Baby steps...)