Nostalgia Critic - The Magic Voyage

[@wow4n00bs]

"How can we ever repay you?" "The land, hand it over"

[@opalyasu7159]

Fun fact: the Europeans also said the same thing to the Africans many times during the 18th-19th centuries

[@firesideentertainment]

@@opalyasu7159 Fun fact: Africa has produced nothing of value, not even a written language, or the wheel.

[@supertommy7226]

1: in Columbus's time, the earth being round was commonly accepted knowledge and had been for hundreds or thousands of years 2: Columbus expected to get to india, not "the new world." In fact, he never knew that he wasn't in india. 3: since when did he land in New York, HE LANDED IN THE BAHAMAS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!!!!1!11!!!! He never saw north America, he thought he was in india...

[@Konrad_Wallenrod]

THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!! Spread the truth mate! I am so sick of "those horrible medieval times" myth!

[@freakagirly]

Bingo. Why do people think Native Americans were (and still are) called Indians? Columbus thought he was in India!

[@coreydoyle4702]

You beat me to it. Great comment.

[@Mudkip971]

1- Nope Columbus and other explorers a little while after him had to prove that the world was round. Until the first moon landing their were still people thinking the Earth was flat. 2- At some point he found out but it still made profit. 3- He landed in the Dominican Republic and the first city he built was named La Isabela after the queen of Spain.

[@freakagirly]

***** No, anyone with an education knew the world was round. The Greeks proved it two thousand years earlier. There are still people today who think the earth is flat; Google the Flat Earth Society. You have your uneducated idiotic conspiracy theorists in every time period.

[@ShakerSilver]

"It never shuts up. There is always talking, always loud music, always something knocking in your ears! ... There is never a silent moment where the film can just breathe or take a break. It is nothing but NOISE!" The critic just perfectly described the original Funimation dub of Dragon Ball Z without even knowing it.

[@shackthadon101]

How!?

[@athenacat8463]

It also describes the dropped pilot of busby

[@mizoreshirayuki6526]

+ShakerSilver Um, how? Usually there's no dialogue and its just music playing in the background when they are powering up lol

[@sweetiebuttons3498]

+Athena Cat And Mr Enter said the exact same thing about it!

[@SlashinatorZ]

+ShakerSilver Actually DBZ had plenty of quiet moments. Its Kai where they never shut up

[@o.r.aproductions]

The animation during the "sock puppet" scene was actually on point-beautiful and fluid.

[@HenryvKeiper]

"He's talking to his little worm..." O_o ...NIGHT EVERYBODY!

[@kenonerboy]

"now he's kissing his little worm "

[@kenonerboy]

***** these days? this thing is old. really old

[@katsu890]

I know another little worm called Pico ¬_¬

[@kenonerboy]

***** ....whats a joke?

[@monkeyshunenugz]

"Now he's kissing the little worm..." Ugh the stuff they're getting away with on kids shows these days.

[@jrpludacrous]

10:15 did that guy just bark? Columbus: My little woodworm friend. Crew Member: Woof woof?

[@helpimarock66]

I grew up with this movie and I never noticed that until now. I'm just pissing myself laughing XD

[@NPC1921]

It was really gruff, he said "Woodworm?"

[@B34634]

Mabye he was trying to say what

[@B34634]

Nick Carlson sorry that reply wasn't meant for you

[@ipicturetrading]

shelby4369 HAHHHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAA XD ROFL

[@ripleyandweeds1288]

Fun Fact: The Greeks knew the world was round long before Columbus.

[@oron61]

In fact they calculated the size of the world better than (and perhaps 2x the size) Columbus did. He was an idiot thinking he'd get to the Indies that way. The Spanish Empire would have had an easier time invading and capturing Portugal and all her trading posts along Africa than going west.

[@luvread]

"Children need slow moments. They need pauses. It teaches them patience and the appreciation of atmosphere." Very insightful, critic :)

[@faolan1686]

Columbus didn't discover American, and it was known from the Greeks that the earth was a globe. Columbus' argument was over the size of the globe and this was due to different sized feet, yards and miles in different countries at the time.

[@chrisrooney690]

Thanks

[@RemainIndoorsPainting]

Indeed. America was discovered by the Welsh.

[@faolan1686]

Spider Pope I think the native Americans will argue with you. If you're referring to the first Europeans; I believe the Vikings got there first. But I could be wrong.

[@RemainIndoorsPainting]

faolan1686 Well yes, i meant the first Europeans. It used to be thought it was the Vikings that first arrived their, but archaeologists have discovered remains of a boat that was only used by the Welsh that pre-dates the Viking visits.

[@gracekelley2907]

faolan1686 Thats right. Vikings did discover America first. I believe Leif Ericson and his crew were the first to actually discover America.

[@therosrex5488]

Fun fact: almost nobody in Columbus' time thought that the world was flat

[@xGothRoseX]

fun fact: there are people in our time that believe the world is flat.

[@therosrex5488]

Mai Aimaia I know. And I really don't understand it

[@douchevick309]

+Mai Aimaia *facepalm* i could literally have gone the rest of my life without knowing that disheartening bit of trivia...

[@NoobGamer-hn5rs]

O_O seriously?.... OMG

[@therosrex5488]

***** To which bit of information? Mine or Mais?

[@phousefilms]

Native:"How can we ever repay you?" Critic:"The land.....hand it over."

[@Ixapter]

I will NEVER get that spyglass scene out of my head. :(

[@robertstephen8372]

Ixapter Same here man.

[@masonrobertstv5917]

Ixapter why does your profile picture look so familiar. Where is it from?

[@waywardlaser]

"WHOA, BOX OFFICE SODOMY" is one of my favourite NC lines, ever.

[@ameribaka]

I didn't believe you until I heard it myself. I laughed so hard.

[@bonarchy297]

I like it when Doug reviews bad kids movies

[@catvslaserpointer9022]

Morsn123 yes it's makes the best episodes

[@tialenmitchell2451]

Spotted Heart watch the end of The Neverending Story review with headphones

[@michaelcolebrook858]

Yep

[@mercury7d]

I now understand that line in the animaniacs song. "It's a great big universe and we're all really puny We're just tiny little specs about the size of Mickey Rooney"

[@TED_Frames]

That hand puppet scene was the nail in the heart for this movie.

[@Kirk00077]

One thing I'm surprised Doug didn't mention here is how horrendously this movie portrays the European view of Earth's geometry in this period. Educated people have known since at least ancient Greece that the Earth is round-Columbus was the one in error. He vastly underestimated the size of the Atlantic Ocean, and when he finally got someone to fund him and reached the Caribbean, he genuinely believed he had gone to India rather than discovering a previously unknown continent. That was later disproved, of course, but by then Europe had found out how rich in resources the so-called West Indies were and India wasn't the goal anymore.

[@segundovargas]

5:29 aside from the loud music, that's my classroom in a nutshell

[@BadReferenceMan]

yep

[@sleepyote]

Same. Hopefully college is different xc

[@mortalbumblebeecat3957]

same here

[@DragoonInferner]

6:44 And that's basically me...

[@kc_9970]

AskFriskandCompany in a nutshell.

[@ajwillustratorauthor]

What's wrong with Anastasia? Just because it was completely historically inaccurate doesn't mean it wasn't entertaining. That's one if my favorite kids films!

[@deltazebes7326]

+Ayanna Watts If they let the Russians animate it, it would have been better, it would have been historically correct while epic then an animation disguising itself as "history" when it clearly wasn't meant to be that in the first place.

[@naughtyfridge2969]

+FurryAmongUs I am answering you again) Have you ever seen russian movies (especially animated)? If you did, you shouldn't be asking it

[@z4rion]

You know... Given what we know NOW about Christopher Columbus, the man deserves nothing more than this movie.

[@nyehhehheh3478]

What do we know now? Apologies, I don't know much about him

[@z4rion]

nyeh heh heh He is responsible for the literal extinction of an entire tribe of Native Americans. Like worse than the Holocaust and what the United States did to the Native Americans almost combined kind of genocide.

[@nyehhehheh3478]

+Zarion Liger wow... Thanks for informing me about this.

[@z4rion]

nyeh heh heh Not a problem. It is important pass on knowledge.

[@douchevick309]

the ones who DID TRY were the spaniards, the ones who STARTED it were Hernan Cortes and all the conquerors who came with him, and what FINISHED it were the illnesses brought by them.

[@silverscreen842]

I actually cried form laughter when he ranted over the spyglass-dick. That never happened before.

[@GenieVillain26]

Rest in Peace Mickey Rooney.

[@Sandlot1992]

GenieVillain26 and Dom Deluise!

[@ShyGuy83]

@@Sandlot1992Now we can add Irene Cara to the list. R.I.P.

[@KunChien]

dude... you really need to learn about german culture! we have kids-storybooks featuring: starvation, torture, people burning to death, mutilation of children, blackface, children getting grinded to bits by a cornmill, murder, we have a childrens song about canibalism, and on christmas, our good children get the present of not being beaten up by krampus. EVERYTHING is familyfriendly in germany (as long as we are not talking about videogames of course!)

[@overdressed]

www.kleine-kinderwelt.de/Kindergeschichten_1/Klassische-Kindergeschichten_13/Die-Geschichte-vom-Daumenlutscher_294.html

[@KunChien]

overdressed i counted that one under mutilation....

[@mariecarie1]

I just Google-translated this. While incomplete, I get the picture. o_O

[@stalkingbutterflies8241]

Kun ChienI know, right? Apparently some people like to judge a different clture's interpretation ofsomething but tehy do not research the culture themselves and I apologie for the crappy typing my lapop is VERY slow nd ladened with viruses so I can't double back without deleting everyything. My dad had a book on German stories that I read when I was ten. Now none of that stuff affects me X"D

[@VidiaReePhoenix]

No offense to any Germans but seeing as their stories for five-year-olds consist of starvation, torture, people burning to death and mutilation of children like a boy's mom cutting off his thumbs because he sucked them with garden shears, I can see why Germany produced a psychopath like Hitler.

[@superanimeniac]

14:50 to be fair, columbus didn't land in america, he landed on the caribbean islands, which had a lot of middle/southern american native tribes at the time.

[@SuperFloxes]

0:00 to 0:13 was the best intro to any video I've ever seen.

[@Ghosty144]

The Magic Voyage 2: Boku no Pico

[@gtmaniacmda]

Well I guess someone had to say it...

[@nosferatuzodd4956]

Directed by m. night shyamalan

[@Darius]

nice.

[@nathanparker8604]

WHY?

[@AleTitan]

TAKE MY MONEY💰

[@THEAP1995]

I love how accepting he is that there's just a swarm lord.

[@Fahrenheart]

Am I the only one who thinks Colombus sounds a bit like Tommy Wiseau? "I did not say the Earth was round, it's not true, it's bullshit, I did naaht. Oh hai Pico."

[@dodongop]

whoa, even the movie title is messed up, the capitalization of letters is all wacky and on the beginning, they state that this story is from when they thought the earth was flat, but later, Columbus has a "square globe" of the world ( and then pico kinda chews it and pretends it got round ), the funniest thing about this is that the places he's going to discover are ALREADY on the map

[@Melodraca]

Still waiting for boku no pico: woodworm edition

[@Mask0fFate]

+StormyPortalDragon DON'T EVER MENTION THAT AGAIN!

[@adamshirk8562]

+StormyPortal Hot....I just comed a bit.

[@legomaker9613]

+StormyPortalDragon Never.....Mention....that anime...again for the love of God Almighty!

[@Melodraca]

LegoMaker961 *Whispers* Boku no pico

[@legomaker9613]

That anime is horrible!

[@MedievalKingdoms1212AD]

Is it weird that I find the Swarm Lord's voice to be really awesome sounding?

[@trainboy7]

As much as I find this movie terrible, the music is pretty decent but it doesn't make up for all the annoying crap in this film. P.S. this movie was brought to you impart by the wonder boner.

[@DiceFTW273]

My wife would like that!

[@therealjoshhart518]

***** YYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU KNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!

[@TheOmegau]

"Return of the why boner!"

[@derekbrink8042]

With a vengeance

[@doglover60446]

MOM GET OFF MY WET BANANA!

[@DGraves921]

Everything Wrong With this move: Christopher Columbus actually landed in the bahamas He only went to south america in his 3rd trip Christopher Columbus was trying to go to east Asia (or the indies as ye old called it) Christopher Columber only learned he wasn't in Asia on his death bed There are no beavers in south america those are native north americans ALL THAT MAGIC SHIT The king and queen were Spanish and it took years to convince them The europeans were split on the idea of a flat or round world AND THIS MOVIE US SHIT GERMANY I LUV YA LIKE A BROTHER BUT WTF LIKE NC SAID "READ A BOOK"

[@TheCanterlonian]

You forgot the "roundness" thing.

[@DGraves921]

Nikolas Powell There was a lot more people who belei end the earth was round than you think

[@TheCanterlonian]

DerekG921 No there wasn't. The European's believed the world was round because they came long after ancient Greece where the roundness was originally proven. You are assuming I think something that I never said I think. Don't do that. When I encountered your comment, the last few sentences including the "The europeans were split on the idea of a flat or round world" part were cut off. Probably another stupid programming mistake that Google made.

[@DGraves921]

Nikolas Powell Yeah probably but I don't really care anymore I aced that test and I don't need to think about that stuff anymore😂

[@TheCanterlonian]

DerekG921 Aced what test? Programming or linguistics?

[@KangaKucha]

Um Columbus... Aristotle figured out the world was round thousands of years ago, even in 1492 times it was that long ago, in fact that was the year (or near it) they invented THE GLOBE! That's a huge huge myth thanks to an american writer in the 18th century.

[@papershadow]

Even more to the point, the understanding that the Earth is round is what inspired Columbus's idea for a voyage in the first place, since he figured going the other way was a clearer path to East Asia than going around Africa, since the Americas were unknown at the time.

[@KangaKucha]

Right although they did invent fictional islands and places. Some that might have existed but haven't been found, maybe wiped out by a hurricane.

[@M-eye-uh-rawr-D]

you definitely mean Pythagoras not Aristotle. Aristotle was a philosopher and record keeper... He wasn't a Mathematician or an early Astronomy... definitely Pythagoras...

[@KangaKucha]

Michael Ierardi I thought it was A, but ok. I heard from someone it was A, so point taken.

[@MasterBombadillo]

Michael Ierardi When you speak about ancient Greece and the philosophers back then, it's hard to make a distinction between philosophy and science. Almost all philosophers we know were also working in other fields (like Pythagoras who was also a philosopher besides a mathematician). And while Aristotle his main focus were physics and biology, you definitely can't say he wasn't a mathematician or an astronomer - he did things in those field too. But both Aristotle and Pythagoras thought the earth was round.

[@guardedheart7855]

So the queen is in love with the guy who sees talking wood worms and moon sprites. WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS!

[@MagmaPaint]

About the Princess character... Why do I keep thinking she's an ancestor of Princess What's-Her-Name from the Earthworm Jim series?

[@coolerthanyourmom123]

nobody thought the earth was flat...they were actually extremely educated in that department, it was a rumor started in the 1940's that people thought it was flat and now everyone believes it...it's ironic really

[@creeperslayer241]

Another one is that (this movie says this as well) That Columbus meant to find America but instead he found it by mistake. (he also wasn't the first person to find America either)

[@SpongeMagic]

That clip from Kindergarden Cop is still priceless.

[@GFWRailFilms]

For me, Anastasia gets a pass on the historical accuracy because of it's interesting characters and story, lovely (for the most part, conspicious CG much) animation, and genuinely quiet and touching moments as well as big and outstanding ones. It's for those reasons I like that film, not for it's lack of accuracy. This film doesn't have any of those, so it doesn't get a pass. This film sucks.

[@danpizza8014]

Yup

[@Cure_Hana]

Yeah, and I actually like Pocahontas.

[@TripleDeckerSupreme]

I don't' understand, why do the voice actors keep talking when their lips don't move?

[@deltazebes7326]

+MMMStudios1000 Because they were lazy as shit.

[@RetroRupp]

+MMMStudios1000 Because the film wasn't originally released in English. It was made in Germany for Germany.

[@TripleDeckerSupreme]

Shoga san That doesn't explain why the American Voice Actors decided to fucking ad-lib the shit out of it. I'm going with Mr.Delta's answer.

[@RetroRupp]

Have you ever watched Japanese Anime?? It's the same shit. They add lib and change stuff around all the time. Yeah I agree, its fucking stupid in this movie. They did a horrible job, But I was just explaining part of the reason why it's that way. If it was totally American, I doubt it would be like this. =P

[@TigerheartFire]

+Shoga san I think MMMStudios1000 was asking about why the American voice actors have the characters speak when their mouths are clearly closed or in a set position. +MMMStudios1000 Is that right?

[@899robinson]

When the Critic tells you to "read a book" at the end of a review, you KNOW it was bad!

[@noneofyrbusiness1]

"How can we ever thank you?"........ "The land, hand it over!". Lol.

[@EyeOfArgus]

00:59 I'd like to see nostalgia critic review that. I haven't seen anastasia in a very long time and I don't remember a thing, but i don't remember it being a BAD movie

[@epicrapfan73]

The Nostalgia Chick did it.

[@EyeOfArgus]

epicrapfan73 and? nostalgia critic reviewed movies that others reviewed before

[@ShovelBumX87]

***** Nostalgia Chick works for him. There's no reason for him to do a review that she already did.

[@EyeOfArgus]

ShovelBum87 tell that to his review of the room and she works WITH him not FOR him

[@EyeOfArgus]

***** actually technically a review is not an object

[@ProfLambeo_VT]

I saw a little bit of this YEARS ago, and I could've sworn that the Columbus character was a pirate (doesn't he look just a LITTLE bit like Captain Hook with a shaved face?). No idea what it was about.

[@dillonwright13]

15:34 I heard the animation director for the film was Phil Nibbelink, one of the co-founders of Dreamworks and former Disney Animator, which could be why this particular scene looks so well animated.

[@Cheezbuckets]

This showed up in my recommendations while my dad was watching a documentary about Columbus. Having actual history going on while watching this just made me laugh at this mess even harder.

[@tasoganedude]

Christopher Columbus sounds like Itchy from All Dogs Go To Heaven. 13:30 Nice Popeye impression!

[@BakshisMouse]

The same actor does both Columbus and Itchy.

[@andrewthefanboy1640]

Dom DeLuise

[@windindi2834]

Definitely one of my favorite reviews by Doug. Who else agrees?

[@daniellavaladez9538]

Man, that intro had me dying of laughter!!! ROFL

[@hung9839]

15:34-15:47 the animation for that part is actually pretty good.

[@candycane1744]

Did the animation change?

[@MediumRareOpinions]

Ah yes, national holidays for somebody who essentially got lost and found some land by accident Seems legit, meanwhile actual exploration achievements that took careful planning go uncelebrated..... 

[@mikeiseastman]

ChaosSandwhich The holiday was to promote the first time America was hosting a Worlds Fair. It lined up with the anniversary of Columbus' journey and giving people the day off meant more days for people to attend the fair and make it financially successful.

[@RockdaNike]

Somebody has never heard of Leaf Arrington day.

[@bear6613]

+Ken Clouds *Leif Erikson

[@mrmundyyy]

+ChaosSandwhich A national Holiday for someone who was the only person stupid enough to think the world was small enough to sail around it (everyone knew the world is round), who murderd 3.000.000 Indians, enslaved the biggest part of them and even got into jail for that.

[@DocAlexandrite]

And he was a rapist that fucked over the natives, might as well celebrate Hitler.

[@midnight_matter8707]

Aaaaaaannd now I'm realising the Swarm lord is an allegory for the Spanish.

[@DalekTheSupreme]

The similarities between this and a certain other insulting, torturous-to-sit-through piece of historical inaccuracy that the Nostalgia Critic reviewed (otherwise known as the OTHER Animated Titanic Movie) are astounding. Astounding in their awfulness. I'm partially surprised he didn't make the connection, but one simply cannot blame him for not wanting to recall either experience.

[@ryankmetz3740]

Fun fact guys, in the early 1990s Disney wanted to make a Christopher Columbus film with Mickey, Donald, and Goofy as the captains of the Santa Maria, Pinta, and Nina. But it was scrapped as the producers didn't know how to handle them landing in the native world. Can you blame them?

[@joyunicycle]

Well that's one slap in the face to not Disney kids films - Disney's smarter than them!

[@lilsingingsensation]

But they did make a Three Musketeers movie that was pretty good

[@shwahgamer]

lilsingingsensation I love that movie.

[@Libluini]

So they didn't want him fighting the Swarm Lord to rescue the love of his best friend, a woodworm? The question is, of course: Would Mickey, Donald and Goofy also try to hang Columbus on their way to the Aztec temple of doom?

[@garretthegamer1221]

I would love to watch disney characters slaughter innocent natives.

[@Dimensioneer88]

How ironic that he criticizes all the noise when that's all his future reviews will be.

[@manamaster6]

Without even mentioning the bugs, how can a movie have so many things wrong?!

[@madisontb529]

Not to mention some awesome musical numbers. 'Once Upon a December' and In the Dark of the Night' were some pretty awesome songs.

[@spikeharusame]

at the start of the video I thought NC had finally snapped

[@SitaraAleu]

The name Pico holds...horrible, terrifying memories for me...(shudder) the horror...the sheer horror of...Pico...Oh god...make it stop!! Make it stop!!! Turn the &$#@%$& computer off!!!! (rips the cable out the back)

[@chubthewhaleanimehunter4081]

And why is it soooo scary for you?

[@jenniferellison9839]

Boku no Pico...(shudders)

[@ohdaniboy2085]

Jennifer Ellison How much did you watch?

[@jenniferellison9839]

Fifteen minutes.

[@ohdaniboy2085]

Jennifer Ellison I would say that's nothing but I understand what you went through

[@Altt]

I remember bit of this from watching it as a kid... and now I think I know why I'm so stupid as an adult.

[@spencermanganiello8544]

It was actually said that the queen had an affair with Columbus

[@ddraigtantoixeniejir5964]

9:41 The United States of... Amsterdam? Looks like this is an AU where the 13 Colonies were controlled by the Netherlands... I approve of this. XD

[@stalkingbutterflies8241]

Ddraigtanto Ixeniejir PFFT X"D No wonder why everyone in my first grade class failed the test we took right after this movie

[@ddraigtantoixeniejir5964]

Lizard Yin Of course. Though to be fair, the Dutch students were just as baffled as well.

[@stalkingbutterflies8241]

X"D

[@Robloxman226]

0:40 Notice the title card's capitalization is odd and inconsistent?

[@LuriTV]

I am german and no, we aren't that stupid. We know the story how Christoph Columbus discovered america in 1492. No talking woodworms and fairies involved

[@manuelalbertoromero9528]

Well the filmmakers certainly don't know his history very well.

[@rafaeltrivino1790]

Of course not all Germans believe the same thing as the guy who made this movie.

[@thebestwingsfan]

6:09 Unfortunately, children are not the only ones. Plenty of teenagers and young adults need this, too.

[@FilmGuy7000]

All these years I've been trying to remember this movie, because I loved it as a kid. Now, I wish it had remained forgotten...

[@Schnipah]

So, two out of three axis powers are incapable of making a historically accurate movie, good to know...

[@Schnipah]

Nate YES!

[@Schnipah]

well, not all of us, but for the most part, I suppose so...

[@SpongeMagic]

What's the other one?

[@BigAmericanGirlFan]

@@SpongeMagic Italy made one of the animated Titanic movies.

[@uhhhjok9415]

when the guy pulled the telescope out of his nuts i died laughing

[@FunkiestRat]

6:20 LOUD NOISES!!!!!

[@FunkiestRat]

I'm okay a bit tired and bored but hey aren't we all occasionally ... How are you?

[@doglover60446]

Hello. I need new glasses.

[@FunkiestRat]

That's cool I hope you receive the glasses that you need

[@3landerBK]

Elephant

[@supertimerip]

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!

[@OkamiNarutoGaaraFan]

But I love Anastasia! It's one of my top movies

[@deltazebes7326]

+SmallSauce Then you like poorly written history made by outsiders.

[@OkamiNarutoGaaraFan]

+Squidzilian 〈///=~ I don't understand why movies have to be exactly historically accurate. I like to watch movies, not documentaries. It's an adaptation.

[@deltazebes7326]

SmallSauce A horrible adaptation, better off just reading the original then flood your mind with this bs. BTW i didn't say they have to be exactly historically accurate, they should at least make some sense to the source material or else it just makes it look like they wanted to create an original story but slapped a name sake on it because they knew it would have failed on it's own.

[@OkamiNarutoGaaraFan]

+Squidzilian 〈///=~ Aren't you just a ray of sunshine

[@AleTitan]

It was my favorite as a kid

[@dennisschalk1956]

Sehr geehrter Herr Nostalgie-Kritiker, Es tut uns wirklich leid. Viele Grüße, Ihr D. Eutsche

[@abigailflynn6400]

Christopher wasn't even trying to find USA, he was trying to find India.

[@ooliveric]

5:29 he just described a Serbian Bosnian wedding

[@andrewvickers1992]

"...Even the animation is inconsistent!" I see what you mean; in what seems like mostly television-esque animation, there are scenes where more fluid feature-film quality animation is featured.

[@RubyH4rt]

Didn't Columbus first land on a Caribbean Island? Since when were the Aztecs in the Caribbean?

[@EnclosedPoolArea]

The real Columbus was an evil, heartless monster.

[@Lithobraker]

2:40 So is Christopher Columbus played by Mr. Briney?

[@dIRECTOR259]

Um... Nostalgia Critic seems to think Columbus discovered the United States of America.

[@SPARTAXKICK9000]

everyone knows it was santa claus who discovered america.

[@garretthegamer1221]

Oliver Delmar no the creators of food fight discovered america.

[@MegaToonzNetwork]

No...I DISCOVERED AMERICA!!

[@negainsectwhite]

dIRECT0R Everybody knows that United states is america, and everyone knows that United States is the only country IN america XDXDXD

[@cryptidrecording]

Has anyone watched this before?

[@JasperValentine]

yeah... i still have the VHS and im ashamed to admit i watched it more than once when i was like a little kid. :'(

[@cryptidrecording]

How bad was this, in your opinion.

[@JasperValentine]

as a kid, it was just a typical dumb cartoon, and i did watch it more than once on rainy days when i wasnt allowed to play in the park, i didnt think much of it then - i was just a kid, i saw animation and i just enjoyed it. now that im older, yeahhh, it has its countless faults, the most notable being its inability to take a breather and heavy adlibbing, untop of it just taking, creative liberties, with history.

[@cryptidrecording]

Yeah, that does make sense, I mean I adored this extremely cheese and stupid kids film when I was younger and now when I watch it I want to destroy the television

[@lordblazer]

this is my first time hearing of the movie.

[@lennypayne4241]

What was the music that played during the one moment please frame at the beginning? I feel like I've heard that before.

[@QueenoftheRandoms]

Why are they glorifying Columbus? Why does America have a day for him? Why is there a kids movie with him in it? He and his crew committed terrible crimes against humanity towards the Natives. Next thing you know there will be a movie coming out for kids called "Adolf Hitler and the magical Holacaust"

[@SPARTAXKICK9000]

i think that already exists

[@Flaris]

I think it's one part being naive about history and one part people just wanting more holidays. Heck there is a holiday for "Family Day." People are that desperate to get holidays that they will invent ones that stupid. The blurred story they pass around sounds good. Guy wanting to prove the world is round, finding a new continent, and changing the world in a sense. But most don't delve as far into the facts. Maybe because it lead to countries that people are happy and proud to be living in. Perception of history can be pretty selective.

[@QueenoftheRandoms]

Yeah, but they probably make a talking gun or something

[@lot24]

I dunno, when I was in K-12 it didn't matter what Columbus Day was about. Sure we got a coloring packet with puzzles and the names of the ships, but all I cared about was the upcoming 3-day weekend.

[@k10edd]

I can answer all of that for you. 1. People were celebrating the day Columbus landed in the new world for centuries before it became an official holiday. They weren't honoring Columbus so much as acknowledging the significance of the date. 2. It became a federal holiday in the early 1900s because Italian-Americans lobbied Congress and demanded a federal holiday for their beloved fellow Italian. 3. No one cared about the atrocities committed against the Native Americans until fairly recently. -For starters, they were heathens that refused to convert (the gall!). -Europeans weren't exactly known for their humane treatment of their own countrymen. I just got done reading a book on European torture devices and typical execution methods; it's unreal. It's honestly not surprising that the Native Americans were treated the way they were. -Everyone committed atrocities against the Native Americans. The Spanish conquistadors and Portuguese explorers were especially brutal. Columbus wasn't the only one. I imagine there's a kids movie about Columbus for the same reason there are kids movies about the Titanic ($$$$).

[@BakshisMouse]

14:00 Woah, space! Woah, trees! Woah, box office sodomy!

[@C_H_handle]

I'm learning so much about my character through this! I'm a Tool!

[@luvahadowsdolls]

That Kindergarten Cop moment made me burst out laughing XD

[@danaburr3296]

"Indeed Germany, what the fuck is up?!" Prussia: Simple, West was drunk when he decided to make this movie Germany: I thought we agreed we were never going to bring this up again....

[@proudtobeme1ashkente]

Prussia: Ja, as well as that weird techno-phase you went through, right? Oh Mann, you totally went nuts back then. Germany: ...

[@lila7500]

JAAAAAANE

[@danaburr3296]

Lila Condon X3

[@mrmundyyy]

+Jane B German: " Ja ja, ich mag Schnitzel!"

[@RoseyCreations]

Hetalia!!!

[@starwarsiscooll]

This movie is just as bad as those Titanic cartoon movies... HEY GUYS!!! LET'S MAKE A KIDS' MOVIE BASED ON TRAGIC CATASTROPHIC EVENTS!!! YOU KNOW, FOR THE KIDDES!!!

[@00sasukelovagirl00]

How is discovering South America a tragic event?

[@starwarsiscooll]

I'm sorry, I guess genocide isn't catastrophic or horrible in anyway.

[@00sasukelovagirl00]

starwarsiscooll Spain didn't genocide the people of South America they brought them into their culture and bred with them.

[@starwarsiscooll]

Okay, maybe u don't understand history or what u were told, but Christopher Columbus and his men TORTURED and KILLED many Native Americans when they came to south america and Caribbean. Look it up. Just like us Americans did too.

[@00sasukelovagirl00]

starwarsiscooll yes, like *us* Americans. Speak for yourself, I'm Native American on both sides of my family. What I said also happened later on though. Columbus's history after he discovered South America was left out of my college history class.

[@bobalinx8762]

That music during the “One moment please” segment sounds so familiar... Where was it from, again?

[@majorfanboy2005]

It's the World 7 music from New Super Mario Bros. Wii.

[@NarfoOnTheNet]

"...and you made squishy with the swarm." ... ... ... ... ...Da faq?

[@JessicaSmith-em9ve]

Gonad friendly spyglasses X""D lost it there X3

[@harrietamidala1691]

I think I remember seeing the Magic Voyage played out on tv screens at a grocery store my family frequented. All I recalled was the little lightbug chewing through the wood globe and Columbus singing in a row boat.

[@xandermagne2141]

The critic is kind of dumb on two counts: when making fun of the Aztec temples, I understand that he thinks that Columbus landed in North America, however, Columbus actually landed somewhere on a Carribean island. There were no Aztecs there either, but it's still not correct. Also, if he did think Columbus landed on North America, they wouldn't have lived in Tipis either. Great Plains natives and other nomadic tribes like the Cheyenne, Lakota, Dakota, and the Apache used Tipis, while eastern natives (As in, the area around the thirteen colonies which I think he is referring to) did not. Then again, the stereotypical view of Native Americans may be part of Doug Walker's character the Nostalgia Critic, and I missed the point.

[@ramirezthesilvite]

I actually watched this when I was little, and I gotta say... I don't recall ever realizing that it was even supposed to be the story of Columbus. So... pretty bad execution on all fronts.

[@GanonGhidorah]

Do you guys ever think about how many movies and TV shows the NC has reviewed, and then realize there are just a few you can't remember; but then even if you can't when you see them again, the memories just come flooding back? That's this review and many others for me.

[@jinhunterslay1638]

6:45 ~ My reaction to bronies in comment sections summed up

[@somerando3992]

14:57 he's giving the finger XD

[@kirbysuperstar5494]

L

[@liv5455]

I love that Columbus just happens to have the same voice actor for Stanley the troll from a troll in central park

[@krianthegreat1971]

8:19 And then, the fire nation attacked!

[@tvsonicserbia5140]

That guy at about 7:40 is a total rip off of jafar

[@airmaildolphin7013]

4:42 I thought the major problem with those clips was the horrible lip syncing of the animation.

[@projectanimation7730]

The Animaniacs references made this.

[@BronyTimereactions]

mickey roonie aka that wheelchair guy from night at the museum