Nurses Share Their Craziest Patient Stories

[@karmiezeny9044]

Good for the dog defending themselves.

[@normanhines5189]

Somebody call the ASPCA

[@sandrashevel2137]

I agree. Poor dog

[@rachelwade124]

3:01 Funny story for you when it comes to "check both ears." This happened when I was like 6 or 7. So, I have a twin brother. I had a lot of ear infections as a kid, but he had his share too (nowhere near as bad as me). So one day he's complaining about his ears. My mom takes both of us to our pediatrician to have him checked out. I was sitting in the exam room with my mom because she couldnt just leave me in the waiting room while the doctor checked my brother's ears. He said my brother didn't have an infection, but then he gave me a funny look, then asked to look in my ears. Deapite feeling completely fine, I had an ear infection. The doctor was smart to check both ears, is all I'm saying.

[@gorgha3988]

I dated a nurse for a while in Texas. I always remember one story she told me. A man wanted to see how warm it was inside his penis. (No mention if he was on drugs or not). So he took a glass... GLASS mercury thermometer and inserted it in his urethra. It shattered. Didn't just break... SHATTERED. Shredded his penis from the inside. Mercury poisoning. Everything you'd expect. Amazing he survived, but you know his life was never the same.

[@stellamcqueen4809]

Kids might say the darndest things, but adults do the darndest things to their genitalia! 😮

[@bethdumont9020]

Contender for a Darwin award right there.

[@jennycarter1149]

@@gorgha3988 omg, poor, silly man😳

[@Nursing1988]

As a retired forensic psych nurse I can tell some stories of mutilating of the penis

[@RedRoseSeptember22]

Oh ouch x.x

[@Starvingmetheartist]

Hey, adultier adult is a term! Usually an adult who can do the thing calmly or without laughing or freaking out. I'm usually the adultier adult but I would need an adultier adult for cockroaches in the ear ngl

[@stellamcqueen4809]

I (age 40) found a corpse in the wild. My immediate reaction, seriously, was to look for an adultier adult 😂

[@jacobroddy7939]

It's not in Websters

[@bardnightingale]

Term = word. It is a phrase. 😊

[@jennifergraceh]

@@stellamcqueen4809oh wow! I honestly don’t know what I would do. I think I’d do the same thing! That is beyond my adulting.

[@notiddymothbirlfriend]

I need an adultier adult: "Oh god what is that? Oh shit I need an adult... Wait... I AM the adult... I need a more adult adult- an ADULTIER adult!"

[@dressagegirlkae]

I have yelled this in a parking lot before.

[@chochosan1981]

A man came in for "something" in his ear. The doctor examined him, then came and told me to schedule an emergency ENT appointment. After the man left to go see the ENT, the doctor told me what he saw. He said that the man had a termite in his ear. But what freaked the doctor out was that every time he shined a light on the termite, he would see the legs wriggling frantically in his ear.

[@bspoon5041]

Many years ago a boss I had wife worked in a downtown hospital in Atlanta. An elderly lady was being checked in and asked medical history. She was asked if she was sexually active. The elderly lady stated "sometimes I just lay there and sometimes I'm all over the place." His wife ended the medical history and excused herself to let the doctor know she was ready to be seen.

[@carolemerle9995]

Man, I’d be laughing so much lol

[@Motivatual]

Imagine how the “leg maggot” guy felt when his pets sprouted wings and flew off, lol!

[@gentlegiants04]

Idk, dude probably didn't have any legs left by then...

[@Vampirzaehnchen]

They grow up just so quickly. :D

[@katepoole6891]

He would get abandoned by his pets. Poor chap.

[@Vampirzaehnchen]

I don't know if that is a thing in the US, but: In rare cases, diabetic limbs get treated with maggots over here. They eat the dead tissue and leave behind a clean wound. Patients with that treatment tend to call these maggots their pets or helpers, since they do a good job. Usually they come in special bandages, so everything can be changed easily, but just having the little ones right on the wound can occur every now and then. Not every maggot will do, we get special maggots raised for medical purposes. Never experienced that treatment myself (and am pretty happy with that) but if it works it's not stupid.

[@hollyw9566]

I think that's being used occasionally in the states. I don't know how prevalent it is here, though. Hmmm. I'll make a note to ask my GP when I go in for my next exam.

[@Nursing1988]

Yes but they're medical maggots and that's totally different!!

[@jennifergraceh]

I’ve heard of this treatment before. I’ve also heard of leeches being used for certain things.

[@jennycarter1149]

Speaking about things in ears. My hubby used to go bush walking. When we went to bed, apparently he had kangaroo ticks on his body, and one of them jumped into my ear. A week later i went to doctor for ear ache. Ended having to go to hospital, to get tick removed from near my ear drum. These things happen to people who clean their ears etc. very unusual, but hey!

[@HopeSingh]

He should do a special on stories from Australia

[@michellebloch8970]

So most of these (and other stories I’ve heard from hospital/dr staff) are making me realize that not nearly enough people are getting recommended for psych consults 🤦‍♀️

[@julieb7882]

Criteria for involuntary hospitalization is very specific. If your basic needs are met and you're not a dan

[@crystalellul845]

2:45 i think the person who said adultier adult meant they were scared shitless of the bugs and needed a different adult to take care of the unwanted guests in said persons ears

[@deliah3003]

Just gonna share that 72 year olds and older are dating and hooking up. My sister works at a Senior Residence Facility and has a great story about how one woman broke her hip when she fell off of….well you can guess the rest 😅

[@lakeireland]

I believe it. The amount of STIs and STDs found in nursing homes is mind numbingly high and on the rise.

[@nola281]

Don't even ask how many times myself and others have had to stop this on the lock ward, it's a lot.

[@PAMELAPORTER-ci7mr]

My mother, who has dementia, is in a nursing home in another city. I called her to check on her, when she proceeded to tell me about the fun she was having talking with the male patients. She sounded very upbeat & happy. 😮

[@serahloeffelroberts9901]

Old ain't dead

[@serahloeffelroberts9901]

​@@lakeirelandSame in 55 plus communities

[@slc1161]

The dog bite case. We had the same type of patient. Won’t say age. Put peanut butter on his wahoo and thought the dog would help him enjoy himself. Dog destroyed his penis.

[@bethdumont9020]

Darwin award contender.

[@joybrooks564]

That guy is into beastiality

[@lorihansen8674]

35 years ago, I was friends with a resident who explained his coverage of the ER as this: one patient came on with a roach in his ear and another patient came in with a roach up his nose. Not kidding. 😮

[@BridgettheBish]

If, at 35, you're "dribbling" you need a prostate examination. Please, men, go get this done! My father put off going, and now he has metastatic prostate cancer and is on home hospice 😢

[@CorgiDaddy2]

Pretty sure that was called a joke but good to put that warning out there for everyone. Go get the butt tickle, my dudes.

[@randomvielleuse527]

💜💜💜

[@melaniebest1742]

It may also be to do with size...

[@jennifergraceh]

I’m so sorry to hear this. I hope your family has found peace and you are taking care of yourself-emotional self-care is often the most difficult during times like this. ❤

[@heatherdickau5335]

You aren't doing just comedy shows. They are emotional support meetings for health care workers.

[@susangarvey9415]

Hahaha, that turd baby story made my stomach ache laughing😂

[@lakeireland]

I believe the breastfeeding thing falls into the of Your Kink Is Not My Kink, But Your Kink Is Okay. That being said, I don’t know why the mom felt the need to share. It’s not cool to traumatize innocent vanillas.

[@BekieBoots]

When you need an adultier adult, it means that you are either overwhelmed and need support, or you need someone that has more authority and/or experience on the the matter.

[@elmersmammalove8577]

Oh not true! My 75 yr old great aunt hits the bar, vacations all the time drives herself everywhere in her convertible Mercedes don’t count the old out she even ice skates still!!! She’s probably got more stamina than you and me combined! Mediterranean diet and Joie de vie baby and NO KIDS !!!

[@hollyw9566]

No kids. There's your key. :)

[@rorytriscuit]

"Is that why they call it a foreskin?" Get out. XD

[@28ebdh3udnav]

My brother and his coworkers would place bets on who would die next in a hospice care facility. Me, "dude, what is wrong with you guys??" Hom, "nothing, we're bored" So yes, having a sick sense of humor is common in the field

[@bardnightingale]

Yeah ... no offense, but that is kind of offensive and not dark humor. Worked hospice. No clue how they found time to get bored.

[@elizabethnash7491]

Hello from Ireland ☘️ We love your work 😂😂

[@iknowyouwanttofly]

Haha you are going to be so happily suprised when your 70+ they are wild and many have so much fun!

[@RayneSaltair]

The maggot named pets was it for me. Are you allowed to refer these people to psychiatric help? I mean most of the "crazy" literally sounds mentally ill.

[@whatTFisThis]

yea as someone who has delt with bot fly maggots b4 i literally cannot comprehend anyone seeing them as friends after seeing the pain of a few of our sheep had from getting them could they not feel anything? sheep are mega tough yet they obviously were in pain when infested which says alot abt how painful it must be

[@polarbearhero9803]

Hey I'm 74 and have a great life -married 50 years. We help take care of our grandkids and have a great time with the toddlers. They make us laugh so hard! I also continue to write (2 million in print).

[@jenniferlehman3342]

Inner city less nurse told me that they need to remove cockroaches from kids ears all the time. They don't reverse

[@jenniferlehman3342]

*Peds

[@crystalellul845]

0:38 you have to wait 6 weeks because its beyond painful to have sex, not only that you have a 6 week check up with your ob/gyn... and like 70% of time usually the woman is still bleeding so its like a triple whammy i dont know how that woman had sex but i really hope her husband was 1 min man because she was probably screaming and not from pleasure

[@mandachris7146]

He needs to learn the word no. She was telling him it was wrong and he wouldn’t listen. That’s S assault

[@michellecoleman5577]

5:39 The belief that your penis is shrinking is a recognized psychiatric condition particularly common in Japan. ... never heard the reason stated as "being eaten from the inside" though.

[@mammasrose5525]

Why Japan though?😅

[@JasonB808]

@@mammasrose5525he saw it in an anime probably 😂

[@ferretyluv]

Never heard of it in Japan, I’ve heard of it from Africa.

[@melschickenjungle7525]

Yes it’s called koro

[@hectorpascal]

@@ferretyluv I read it happens mainly in SE Asia and Africa for some reason. Possible etymology: In Malay and Indonesian "kura" means "tortoise head" and by extension (!?) "shrink"!

[@queensheza7375]

At 72 I was training my horse. And riding and working full time.

[@bexfisch80]

The breastfeeding story made me think of Homelander from The Boys 😂 But real talk... I've heard stories about women with clogged milk ducts while breastfeeding and sometimes had to rely on their partners to unclog it because the baby couldn't and the pump wasn't working. Not sure if that last story was like that...but it could have been.

[@chelseacarpenter2302]

10:38 👁️👄👁️ I'll see you in hell because I snorted 😂😅

[@nicholas8476]

peppermint oil works better than Vick's. For those who need to know.

[@ragokitten]

Not sure about the breast milk thing… my husband wanted to try it once. Then there was one time in the middle of the night, where I didn’t have my pump, and my baby wouldn’t latch on or wake up for a feeding, so he had “helped me” relieve the pressure.

[@slc1161]

Multiple patients come in with maggots or bedbugs. Always homeless or addicts or mentally ill or any combination. I was an ICU/ER nurse with wound care training so I saw it all. Smelled it too.

[@hollyw9566]

Hat's off to you. I can't stand to even shake hands. I wish we could bow to each other in the west, from a nice, comfy distance. I am on the spectrum, so . . . I had a friend who was an ER nurse in Detroit for 25 years. She saw some sh*t.

[@jengsci8268]

I lost it at "fore" skin 😆

[@hectorpascal]

I did a mental double take at folding it over a golf ball! For most men that would really take some stretching!

[@hybridflowers]

I watch your videos solely to remind myself why I no longer work at a hospital.

[@JoaoPessoa86]

which end of the sword though??

[@GhostBear3067]

That is a very important question!

[@deathybrs]

DAYUM! That last joke, though.

[@SuperNerd57]

Oh lord it took me a second to process it, and I just buried my face in the couch while cry-laughing “NO! NOOOOO…!”

[@dazzlingextremes389]

I'm shocked there aren't more comments on it.... 😂

[@dulcefe5851]

I don't want to find anyone here thank you there's to many crazy people here 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 I'm glad that dog defended it's self go dogo!

[@NaraBoy89]

The patient with the maggots clearly was a nurgle cultist. Would of gotten the heavy flamer for that one, The Emperor Protects

[@thewhitewolf58]

Wondering if any occupation other than police can compete with craziest stories, considering in both your job is to encounter people in their worst moments.

[@Kitsune1989]

SARs. The stories I could tell you... I've made paramedics raise an eyebrow once or twice.

[@fredmiriam313]

I know of some Dutch famous biologist who got larva in his leg while traveling and decided to let them grow inside his leg because "they didn't harm him" He's called Freek Vonk, and he gave them names and showed everything online, vlogged his doctor's appointments and everything 😂

[@lorrainewoodward3446]

Don't maggots turn into flies at some point? I don't know how long it takes, but...

[@brookeclark2219]

I’ve used them in wound care. Medical grade maggots. They are covered with the wound for 3 days. After the 3rd day they start to convert. Sure clean up a necrotic wound.

[@stephaniehowe0973]

A nursetech and didnt know about the 6 weeks 😂

[@slc1161]

ER tech. He doesn’t do post OB care.

[@stephaniehowe0973]

@@slc1161 True. Of course I am a woman. I thought everyone knew.

[@hauntedshadowslegacy2826]

As far as I can tell, it's more of a general rule of thumb. Some will bounce back a little faster, some need a few extra months. For someone who's had a c-section, it'll probably be a good while before they're okay enough to get back at it.

[@KristenRowenPliske]

Usually, post childbirth-vaginal or c-section-we’re told not to use ANYTHING vaginally until the bleeding stops. Could be 6 weeks, could be 10. As a post-surgical RN, those same instructions are given to women who’ve had any kind of surgery to their uterus &/or vagina.

[@hollyw9566]

I didn't know, but then, I had one kid and considered that THAT was quite enough, thank you. I wouldn't have even considered having another one let alone that soon!

[@cosmocat2430]

I know family who took their 5 yo kid to an x-ray after he tripped and fell on his arm and they suspected it to be broken. his arm was fine. thank god. but in the x-ray pictures they also cought his ear and so they found out that he stuffed some play-doh like cloud slime into it and forgot about it :D what a coincidence. they cleaned his ear and he had better hearing afterwards. I think its insane how easy bad hearing or seeing can fly under the radar because kids often cant put it into words or dont even notice it. with 10 years old i found out that you normally should be able to see things clear and not blurred. i was nearsighted (i guess it was -2dpt and -2,5dpt then) but i didnt know it. they put my first glasses on me and i teared up on how HD everything suddenly was :D

[@jhdix6731]

That sword story must be a variation of a sword-swallowing trick. I mean, sword-swallowing in return must be the climax in any such perfomance

[@VivaLaVittoria]

wait how how did he drill through the golf ball???? power drill? Very very slowly with a manual drill? I have so many questions.

[@michellemelville8979]

Given some of the videos I've seen with full on bolts being screwed down the urethra.... like ring spanner stuff. I think a hammer was involved somewhere to to tap it in further. It's usually just morbid stuff and strange ways to d@*. But yeah. It's a thing apparently.

[@davidturney2975]

It's Ks/Missouri the answer to what we have going on here is boredom

[@lakeireland]

I mean there’s a reason Missouri’s other nickname is “Misery”… That being said, I had a fantastic time in KC,MO for a school function years ago. Having to run-walk on the icy sidewalk in heels to the convention center was kinda shitty tho.

[@whatTFisThis]

4:47 as someone who has had to deal with bot fly strikes on animals, i cankot imagine ever thinking of them as friends, especially if theyve infested you and i also unfortunately know that smell they mentioned, ive only smelled it once thank god, so i dont remember it well, but i most definitely would recognize it if i ever smelled it again

[@Kellykittymom]

Steve, next time you come back to NC, come to Wilmington! 🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@nobody2655]

That last dig!😆😆😂 I am fucking dying! That was great!

[@AbidingHopeMentalHealthCoach]

I have a 77 year old instructor who is still working as a counselor, goes to the gym, plays golf at 4 am, navigates PowerPoint and Zoom… I think you were thinking of 87 or maybe 97.

[@WorthyMissJ]

So many rabbit holes to choose... 😂

[@christinamann3640]

Wrong hole!😂

[@jenjaffray5850]

"You can't dribble with a golf ball." Oh my, Steve.....

[@Cynthia-iz5qp]

IDK, but I am 65, and I work full time, manage a duplex, single mother of 3 adults, and work out. I don't plan to quit at 75 or 85. Why should I? When you stop, you die. Just yesterday, people thought I was 45, the same age as my eldest son. In fact, we have been mistaken as husband and wife with our two children. 😅

[@theylied1776]

(Irish twins). That is a term they used to use back in the day. When the mothers would talk s#&t about another mother, and they didn't want the younger kids to know what they were talking about.

[@LilithsOwn303]

Oh you're coming to the U.K soon! Too bad I'm handicapped otherwise I would love to come see your show!

[@meeshmccoy]

Did u just say u lost a baby? Been there. Had a stillborn at 18….no word can help but know my heart is giving love and hugs. ❤ Also thanks for making me laugh! Can you come to Utah?

[@fleur_and_flower]

Gotta wait at least 6 weeks because the new mother has a dinner plate-sized wound in her uterus (where the placenta detached) that's still healing and which is AT RISK of infection if someone decides he wants to get all horny all up in there 🙄 Men, please don't introduce fresh baby batter into an open wound! And women, don't let them! It's so scary that neither men or women are aware of this 😭

[@blondiereece8451]

there is nothing wrong with going to renaissance fairs

[@GnomeInPlaid]

The chanting at the jousting match "Blood makes the grass grow, blood makes the grass grow!"

[@carolemerle9995]

I happened to be on call one weekend when I got a call for a transfer to an Urology unit at another hospital. This 65-yr old man (who caths himself) resorted to putting a sewing needle in his urethra when he couldn’t pee. Obviously, there was so much scar tissue that they had to re-route the catheter to being a suprapubic site (below the belly button). Just when you think you’ve heard everything….

[@elizabethperrone8649]

I know someone with a urostomy. Probably due to proud flesh the hole closed to the point that it could no longer function. He lives in a very isolated area and hates asking for help. So he grabbed some tools from the garage and forced it open with a screwdriver etc until it was a size he could manage. I’m sure it was painful. Yet he never got an infection and has had no trouble since

[@billcampbell5810]

I love your videos thanks a bunch my friend

[@AmyHoldaway27]

I actually went to a ren faire today lol

[@Feral_Tiger_Bonezzz]

Great!! Just keep swords away from your anus

[@Psilomuscimol]

I had a roach in my ear when I was a kid. My mom pulled it out with tweezers but it had already tore up my ear and it hurt

[@GalacticGoddess46]

72 year olds are dating and fucking quite happily 😂

[@spykethespider5070]

The roach one scares because I'm in the process of getting rid of roaches. Now I won't be able to sleep.

[@ms_minna]

I knew eating breakfast wasn’t a smart idea while watching this video. It’s been a couple hours since I ate the breakfast and it’s still close to coming up by the maggot story. 🤢

[@rinvira4180]

Hi Stevieeeee! I am just glad to have finally found your youtube channel. ❤✨️

[@aprildegele1510]

This kind of stuff is exactly why I wouldn't work anywhere other than the ER.

[@NMartin2u]

surgical tech here, weak ass tech is mufkn hilarious 😂😂😂😂😂

[@aprildegele1510]

Pet maggots are the worst. We had a homeless patient that lifted a lobster from a close Red Lobster. The cops were called for many reasons, one being that he put his pet lobster in the swimming pool at a nearby hotel. We evaluated the guy, then put him in psych care and attempted everything we could to save the lobster. Poor lobster was dead by morning because he had no salt water and had been breathing chlorinated water in the hotel pool. We honestly felt so bad that we couldn't save his pet. You'll never see weirder shit than you will in the ER.

[@ambyburum2666]

Where can I order the pink shirt you have on??

[@hopebrothers8307]

When I was EMT( 29 / F at the time ) in a ER . Pt ( 80 something )came into ER after she swallowed a quarter of an apple and she couldn’t swallow per pt. ER MD ordered UA sample pt is incontinent so straight cath . After explaining what I was going to do and I then went about inserting tubing she started yelling she is ra..ng me. She then told anyone who spoke to her to have me arrested for ra..ing her

[@Tcamp95818]

You so cute steve you make me smile

[@Becks071]

Beats the guy we had draining his foley into his water jug. Yes he drank it.

[@diananicolecastro]

Glad I’m not this lonely.. yet? LOL

[@joeh7630]

Turtleneck or full anteater? 😍

[@DaveKeller-l5u]

I worked here for years and cockroaches in the ear was very common

[@goldengirl6805]

Yes 6 weeks. Or more, be careful. My answer is no holes, period .

[@kellynorman3930]

Where he fall asleep... The Waffle House? I snort laughed at that one😂😂😂🎉

[@dietotaku]

that dude with the "pet" maggots was literally being eaten alive wtaf

[@Reptile1404]

Maggots won’t eat living tissue! They are even occasionally administered by doctors to eat necrotic flesh and clean wounds. It’s as disgusting as it sounds!

[@michellemelville8979]

Some species only eat dead tissue rather than living so they can actually help with wound care (to some extent)

[@danielle2451]

Lol oh my. That's a lot of processing

[@updownstate]

When I was in college I had imaginary cats. Patches and Sally. Sally was a marmie.

[@JamiGoss-f3h]

NO!!! Kansas City finding each other would be IDIOCRACY🫣🤭

[@Dawgluvr]

You’ve clearly never been bitten by a chihuahua. 🎉

[@evilmarken]

4:04 I was about to say if he didn't salute the turd baby the patient would have been mad at him too

[@journeysoutloud1990]

3:29 I would have laughed and kept walking if I was the doctor.

[@scottmaness4449]

Yea... they tripped and fell on it.

[@VeneraBerens-n7d]

🎉😂🎉 NATURALLY 🎉😂🎉

[@MadameSomnambule]

The last one lol. I get being into breastfeeding, but at least wait until the baby's done eating first XDDD

[@amanda25397bunny]

6:57 Omg why was that so funny

[@GmaPati]

The last one has to be a joke, my daughter has 2 rainbow babies and if my son in law would ever do that she would put the hurt on him. By the way my beautiful grandson is now more than 2 years old, praise God!

[@mandachris7146]

It wasn’t your dirty it was just nature. Nothing else

[@TheVeggiekat]

I love ren faire 🙁 I even dressed up last time.

[@normanhines5189]

In Honolulu, there is a road called Wong Ho Lane

[@BBSYDmom]

Did I hear right, you’ve lost a baby? I’m so so sorry for you and Mom 😢🙏🏼

[@tomntammybrown3817]

In some cultures it is a bonding ritual for the husband or father of the baby to drink the breat milk from the mother of his child.

[@msbarbarasimmons7890]

North Kansas City Hospital 😂🎉