One Hour of Jerma985 Rants (to fall asleep to)

[@robbieboydudeguy]

His red dead rant blue screening TWICE really felt like a wile e coyote moment

[@nookiepookiedookieWHAT]

of course it does, jerma is a looney tunes character after all

[@justanormalguy1841]

I genuinely felt bad for him in this moment since I know how horrible having literally everything go wrong is along with the fact that he’s streaming to hundreds of people so he’s not even suffering alone he’s suffering in front of a CROWD 😭

[@Ar_sole_hair_fiddler]

His seconds of silence felt like minutes

[@DoctorKarkand]

I sometimes wonder if all the effort he put into playing RDR was worth it.

[@Remls]

Favourite part about him repeatedly telling us about him screaming in the car is the game called Screamride on the screen

[@sereshaw]

Cant wait to pretend that jerma is my insane roommate who cannot shut the fuck up at 3 am

[@skukko9627]

Next level delusion

[@ding-dong_bing-bong]

He is, you just haven't seen him yet.

[@skukko9627]

@@ding-dong_bing-bong He’s in your walls

[@jmbkpo]

Check your walls...

[@katzea.a7880]

hyperthimia andy

[@qro.]

the best part about red dead rant is that when the blue screen appear he is STILL ranting and telling the story, like he just sitting in a room staring at a dead camera yelling and screaming at it like we can still see and hear him.

[@chaseywoot]

@@qro. I sometimes wish I could hear what he was saying...

[@klotekat]

I think it was a misunderstanding bc jerma thought he bluescreened after he said "I got in my car" but he didn't, he bluescreened way later so you saw what he said

[@asdf-sr1ny]

@@klotekathe thought he bluescreened a lot longer

[@SPARKRIZZLE]

i think the red dead meltdown was one of the only times jerma has been genuinely super angry on stream

[@20jumps]

he was very angry a couple of times during his elden ring playthrough

[@BotFisherman]

​@@20jumps Many unfortunate chatters perished during his Elden Ring streams, for his anger and wrath knows no bounds 😔

[@larsthedude1984]

Only other times were Simpsons Hit&Run and ULTRAKILL

[@slightlybiggerboss7442]

Stuntman Ignition was a great one

[@lungse.2565]

​@@BotFishermanLiterally 1984 😔

[@the-red-thing]

Man this guy HATES.

[@Dabednego]

His life is pain

[@LuZse]

he hate-

[@hisodoyuhus]

He even influences others to hate chairs

[@mcbogom]

@@hisodoyuhusMakes sense to me.

[@moeinmaleki7859]

The red dead incident made a permanent mark on jerma's psyche

[@worldwide_yamada]

everytime he turns the webcam on just to rant he makes me kick my feet in the air

[@ItsDSP]

He DEMANDS that you look at he as he unleashes his rage.

[@Zyxxx101]

Feels like I'm on the jury for Jermas trial

[@Lux_Ferox]

For that chat member he put in the woodchipper.

[@SweatEagle]

Ladies and gentlemen of the court, Exhibit A.

[@Noah-lo9vb]

This is fucking crazy

[@SnowyHedgehog727]

jerma talks about aliens like they live in a completely separate dimension than us rather than just another planet

[@sterpogamer7958]

gonna cause the war because they get treated like toddlers

[@TheArachnoBot]

I mean they can

[@Chillerll]

He knows more about this than we ever will.

[@jerkocalypse4199]

Red Dead Redemption fiasco is by far my favourite rant, peak Jerma content

[@BagelBagelB1]

funniest moment ever

[@internetuser2414]

I fell asleep to this drunk and now I have the worst fucking hangover

[@Chillerll]

Why would Jerma do this to you smh

[@rawmaw]

Bless ya

[@pppicklep914]

The amount of times this man has ranted about aliens is suspiciously enough for me to think he might just be an alien who came to Earth with nothing that we have

[@kodachromeraccoon5448]

I will never get over Jerma immediately deciding that all of the aliens 1) have a national anthem 2) have a *singular* national anthem and 3) it sounds just like the American one Like I know that was just off the cuff but I find the idea of that so funny

[@JacobPlays136]

He then goes on to say that ANY sounds produced by another creature would be worth killing them. He's all over the place and it makes for an incredibly entertaining rant. Also, the bewildered "WHAT IS THIS?!?!" when looking at the geode that a professional geologist explained EXACTLY how it formed to him is my favorite part.

[@Gakulon]

​@@JacobPlays136 To be fair, as a geology enthusiast, geology is magic. Earth rocks

[@JacobPlays136]

@@Gakulon I guess I'm coming at it from the perspective of a computer scientist, computers were like magic until I actually learned about computer architecture. Now I'm just surprised they work as reliably as they do.

[@kodachromeraccoon5448]

@@JacobPlays136 I say “this is MAGIC POWERS!” So much and nobody knows what I’m referencing

[@Teriiiyakiii]

I watched this late last night and dreamt Jerma somehow chroma keyed himself into my dream, and told me a corny joke. When I didn’t laugh, he just kinda awkwardly chuckled and vanished, but like I could still hear him talking to chat. He went "see I KNEW she wouldn't like it! omg that was so stupid we gotta leave" and then the dream just casually continued with me walking through an infinite crowded shopping mall.

[@PiranhaTeeth]

This is so beautiful thank you for sharing 💜

[@PiranhaTeeth]

/gen!!!!!

[@hisodoyuhus]

Real monkaS times we live in

[@giulioturina2772]

Was there a giant on top of the mall eating people?

[@blondieneon]

This is so funny and in-character for him, I love it

[@KNIGHTMARE__]

This is actually a fantastic video because I sleep to Jerma streams all the time. Jerma unironically helps me relax and sleep

[@soulreaver6546]

I've been reusing his house flipper streams constantly

[@KNIGHTMARE__]

@@soulreaver6546 those are some of my favorites to play in the background

[@null.6669]

That's how he infiltrates your dreams and, soon enough, your entire brain. You will be jerma986

[@magicpotion7252]

​@soulreaver6546 I'm gonna finish normally watching them and then I'll probably start using those too!😂 for now I put his power washing stream on loop so I can have it all night

[@Reac2]

Enjoy slowly absorbing Jerma rants, unfunny bits and unhinged call outs like the meat grinder™ into your subconscious

[@mn_kr]

jerma can rant about anything and nothing its amazing

[@chaseywoot]

@@mn_krThat's the gift he was given lol

[@OrcistCleaver]

The gift of gab

[@CallofFreaky]

Putting Jerma's rant about technology developing consciousness inbetween the read dead struggle and constant bluescreens is hillarious

[@brycetearules]

How can anyone sleep when this thing is still out there somewhere?!

[@potavio460]

Omfg this is amazing I was thinking about downloading and editing jerma rants to sleep to, and in the same day it's uploaded to youtube, this is the best community ever, I love you deranged people and I feel at home

[@chaseywoot]

This video was made SPECIFICALLY for you in fact so you don't have to put in the work! Thank you for coming up with the idea

[@vincenttorrijos9680]

47:47 he's doing the thing he questioned at 27:36

[@moritakaishida7963]

I appreciate his rant on older games, lotta people now will straight up refuse to play something if its older than Like 2 years old

[@mynewollabilyne4004]

The glasses rant is honestly so real i got a new prescription months ago and it been a long time since i got my last check up so my eyesight was shit, when i put the new glasses on i fully thought i was going to have a panic attack and throw up its super overwhelming *at first*

[@RivenWasTaken]

HOLY SHIT WE PEEPED THE HORROR 27:37

[@rominaloves]

can't wait to fall asleep to this 💖

[@chaseywoot]

Good night 😴

[@totemxatu]

I still love how in the alien rant he’s going off about how aliens wouldn’t comprehend human technologies/ideologies and then without hesitation suddenly decides to use bees as a supporting argument

[@SellaturcicaArt]

The fact he let chat confuse him about jello and jelly when they are completely different foods is so funny lmao. Like I am aware they call gelatin desserts 'jelly' in some places, but the jelly in America is just the fruit juice part of the jam/preserves with none of the solids or seeds. Jello has gelatin in it (from bones) and needs to be dissolved in hot water and cooled back down before it solidifies. In the US, jelly is like a lower quality, more processed version of jam and is used/eaten in the same way as jam/preserves.

[@vamppanic]

the rest if the world generally refers to fruit flavoured gelatin as “jelly”. america is one the of the only places that so vehemently refers to so many things by their brand name, like calling tissues kleenex.

[@arootube]

Typo. I win.

[@fort809]

@@vamppanic europoors just can’t tell the difference between gelatin and jam. I don’t care that Hannah Glasse named it “jelly”, they’re completely different foods

[@SweatEagle]

That RDR rant is actually unhinged. Edit: oh my god this whole video is unhinged

[@darinasa4428]

no mater what happens, there's always a jerma long edit before sleep

[@dullahandulla1796]

I think its crazy how we all just started listening to Jerma to fall asleep. Like one day we put on a random Jerma stream and fell asleep to his yapping. Now we have videos dedicated to falling asleep, listening to jerma… i dont know what it is that makes me fall asleep so good.

[@rathivemind2936]

i have no clue how but this video cured me of my terrible spinal headache. thank you

[@chaseywoot]

You're welcome..? It was my plan all along

[@aRealGhost_]

i cant get over "hd puke"

[@cobalt2672]

I love how Jerma keeps characterising aliens as both terminally stupid and terrified of basic concepts such as "food" and "sounds"

[@perryspineapplepodcast2438]

“January doesn’t exist” 5:11 😂

[@statiksea]

Jerma is so fascinating because sometimes hes completely right but he explains things so poorly that it feels utterly impossible to agree with him. Despite that, he is right, months and our measurements of time are social constructs based on scientific analysis of the rotation of the earth and its orbit around the sun. But his breakdown of it is completely goofy

[@Reac2]

​@@statikseaIt's always "before Isaac Newton we could float around" logic. The time frame always existed, we just gave it a name. January doesn't "not exist". The time frame it described always did. Then we called that time frame January and now it exists as both the time frame and something being called January. This man's mind works in truly wondrous ways. Noone tell him that October is actually supposed to be the 8th month and the entire calendar was messed up by two megalomaniacal roman emperors

[@Clairevoyant101]

my one issue with his argument of giving an alien an apple at 51:20 is that humans instinctually crave sweetness as our tree dwelling ancestors wouldve eaten a lot of fruit due to them being arboreal (many plants, to spread seeds, evolved fruit which became more and more nutritious and sweet to attract animals), this drive for sweetness has sort of molded our tastebuds/brain to react positively to sweetness as a sensation because our brain instinctively associates sweetness with fruit and fruit with nutrition. Now our taste has been molded oppositely by bitterness, due to bitter thing USUALLY being PRETTY BAD for the human body. Both of these instinctual reactions stem from our evolutionary history of arborealism. Now take an alien. We don't know the evolutionary history of this hypothetical alien but let's say it was a ground dwelling species which survived off of eating small insect like organisms which had a sort of bitter taste (to humans). They would associate that bitterness with a positive response due to their ancestors relying heavily on this bitter tasting food source and that sweetness as humans understand it could simply not exist on this alien planet. If the alien consumes the apple (and isnt killed/poisoned by whatever nutrients its body isnt adapted to handle/break down) that sweetness would either not be experienced at all OR it could be taken as a negative response, and give the same reaction as humans with bitterness. I feel like the best way to find a food to feed an alien would be to first establish a solid and understandable form of communication between our species, and then have certain individuals share experiences with certain flavors (say both eat a lime or some alien fruit and tell the other what sensation it gives) and then use basic reasoning to find an item from both planets which the other could safely eat. And I am now realizing as I'm typing this that I came to the same conclusion as Jerma and that an apple is probably the best way to start.

[@mtgbigdog5984]

we should send these words to aliens

[@MercuryBlackN]

tldr ywnbaw

[@spuids]

i didn't see the "rants" in the title and got really confused bout 15 minutes in when i half asleep realized "why is he so angry in all these clips? this sucks to sleep to!" and i looked at the title and felt stupid

[@Siggney1]

the everything is magic rant is killing me, especially the bee part, like this dude just learned how ecosystems work and he is livid

[@acidknight6523]

17:20 I love that you put the iconic sound clip from tv super stars when he showed the case.

[@marzby]

If I fall asleep to this my dreams will be unimaginable.

[@3MB4R]

"Hipster streamer is different for the sake of being - " immediately attacks camera

[@JermaFan9000-sn2vz]

falling asleep to this

[@chaseywoot]

@@JermaFan9000-sn2vz your name checks out lol

[@guaage]

what if I don’t want to fall asleep to it… what if I watch every single second of this video? hah, get prank’d

[@IHateGenericCereal]

he's always so right, but he's especially right about the windows bloat

[@Ingaldre]

It Just shows the stranglehold Microsoft has over the OS market where people think they're optionless when it comes to these matters

[@grmpf]

@@Ingaldre True, but at the same time, would you trust Jerma with running any Linux distro?

[@Ingaldre]

@@grmpf I'm not saying he should switch to Linux though because it's obviously not (or wasn't, now that he's retired) viable for him as streamer who would naturally desire the widest selection of games and application support available.

[@bluegummybear8667]

i cant lie, this dude is spitting straight facts with a lot of these rants

[@genderender]

the capcom rant is so true

[@naoisme]

painted my nails to this, it was a nice time, thank you

[@bigbeefscorcho]

I nailed my paints to this, it was awesome thanks

[@orionbarnes1733]

low view count Jerma compilations are the best

[@foxxy-3748]

I love how he has a whole rant about how aliens with space-faring technology would somehow be shocked to see something simple like a photograph or a calendar.

[@maczerker9300]

we have BEES on this planet!

[@thearchitect5405]

I love how he went from Xbox because of Red Read, to Playstation and immediately had trouble again now with Sony.

[@ItsB3enLikeThis]

I love how the alien rant is pretty much just him acting like a caveman and being super confused and fascinated with basic things around him lol

[@Icetea-2000]

I was really willing to guve him the benefit of the doubt about the "we made time up" thing, contemplating how time is just in the perspective of the observer for us in the fourth dimension and depending on gravity being exerted on a body, and then he went on to say "sun goes up, sun goes down"…

[@MadamApocolips]

I put my phone under my pillow and the muffled sound makes it feel like back when i used to fall asleep to radio shows on a small clock that had a built in radio i had

[@SecretsBehold]

I fall asleep every night to jerma already, thank you for this

[@a.s.1659]

this is so coquette

[@twinfastasytowers]

pov jerma is your roommate and is just yapping for several hours while he thinks you’re awake and won’t shut up

[@justanormalguy1841]

Seeing him rant is both entertaining and incredibly saddening at the same time, it’s like watching a car crash. You can’t take your eyes off it, but you can’t help but wonder, “Are those people okay?”

[@thegiantegg9672]

My favorite thing about jerma's alien rant is that he starts talking about the aliens like he knows exactly how they'd react to everything we have and do. I also like how the only like, logical thing he has to say about aliens is that, if we're presenting them with food, we should DEFINITELY avoid giving them any kind of fast food or anything greasy, because I'm 100% convinced that that would destroy the digestive tract of anybody who was not born on earth the last like 150 years.

[@hellbenders87]

thanks this is perfect for after work getting home at 1:30am

[@hellbenders87]

i will sleep like baby

[@Jordan-rb28]

I will listen to this tonight in my headphones as I fall asleep, I am not kidding. I will provide a trip report tomorrow morning. Cross your fingers!

[@boarmatter]

This is THE video I've wanted for YEARS

[@taeso0o]

i watched this right before i went to bed and had a dream the jerma put me in his bowl of soup

[@7xxxx7xxxx7]

Oh how I miss him, my poor, poor Jeremy 985

[@Patasa]

This video is absolutely amazing

[@campbell1232]

genuinely was thinking about 2 hours ago that i would love a comp like this because i actually use his rant-y streams to sleep to 😂

[@monerl115]

jeremy can you keep it down im trying to sleep ???

[@imarls]

idk how youtube knew i was going to sleep right now, but i’m happy that it did. just went on here to find something to listen to to fall asleep and this pops up. i’ll try this tonight to see if it will help mend my insomnia and stuff, thank you for your service jerma and uploader

[@Sans_The_Skeleton]

they know when you close youtube for long hours at night that you’re sleeping

[@Niall_Woods]

I love how he treats the aliens who are capable of interstellar travel like children/cavemen. The super advanced creatures can’t handle spice or loud music, too daunting for them!

[@retroTiko]

the glasses story is actually relatable i used to refuse to wear my glasses too. especially when i wasnt driving for years. then i had to start driving for work and eventually got a car and then had to force myself to wear them. it did give me a headache too at first. sometimes i take them off like "ok ive seen enough now"

[@pebabmey]

i'm siding with jerma on the jelly debacle. yes i get that jelly is a gelatin dessert in other parts of the world but we go by the jello brand name in USAMERICA. jelly and jam are two remarkably different things as well. a strawberry jelly and jam are differentiated by the amount of chunked fruit content in them.

[@kurzwaren9304]

Also jams and jelly have pectin which is naturally occuring in fruits, but gelatin isnt? I think

[@miffypng]

i genuinely watched this to fall asleep, but it was too interesting. now it's 2:11 and i'm still awake

[@airknytt]

oh my god that glasses rant is so real i dont like the hd world either

[@sean_r]

i think jerma is genuinely very smart. this is a WISE man, this guy could be a sage on a mountaintop, he just explains things weird sometimes

[@effien]

why is he so mad about a 15 minute drive to walmart lmao

[@Deadlineontop]

I would be too if I drove there for nothing

[@thesnowmiser6728]

It's an hour of driving altogether, I'd be annoyed

[@hand13932]

its more about the random, absurd, stacking inconveniences. like, "what the fuck?!?" kind of deal

[@MercuryBlackN]

@@thesnowmiser6728 its 30 minutes what are you talking about?

[@ArcaneStrain]

Genuinely scared me when he grabbed the camera after someone called him a hipster 😂

[@ainou2001]

The thumbnail is so real

[@junpei8880]

falling asleep to this now!! Thank you so much

[@Jokirockers5]

I love his alien rants. They're my favorite 💞

[@ThemisadventuresofLu]

See you get it, this is exactly what I’ve been looking for

[@laurenwesten]

This video is a blessing. My fyp has been blessed. Thank you for this blessing

[@trapsena]

i love how he went on a whole music overwhelming aliens rant and then reacted the same way for ultrakill

[@chaseywoot]

@@trapsena maybe he is the alien

[@tim.creenis]

Love you man this is a great way to fall asleep

[@sweet-nessu]

Jello is BONES

[@asdf-sr1ny]

I can't thank you enough for this. Seriously dude this is a masterpiece. This is heavenly. TIME DOESN'T EXIST

[@Owlero]

27:37 First time we PEEPED THE HORROR

[@jacquespaught]

I still think the funniest part of the alien rant is that he automatically thinks the Alien National Anthem would just be a gibberish version of Star Spangled Banner

[@scarthecheetah1958]

I’ve fallen asleep to this video 4 times now and it’s perfect thank you

[@Thomas_Angelo]

It's 2 am here, I haven't watched Jerma in 6 months, and here is KZbin recommending me this. Thanks YT algorithm.

[@kirbytrooper]

Jerma breaking about ben franklin in hell is so funny

[@JohnSalchichonYT-]

I really need more of this

[@kirbytrooper]

The way he gets intrigued that ice melts in glass of water in a room temperature enviornment doesnt freeze is so funnt

[@Scharfster]

watching this gets me so riled up along with him because i agree with him on most of these rants lmao

[@Lexelai]

I get sleep paralysis anytime I fall asleep to a jerma video

[@bobertbolero]

I love that the thumbnail is him going WHAT??! WHAT IS THIS??!

[@TheRealKiRBEY]

jerma is my sleep paralysis demon

[@isabellaleonora6581]

watching this with subliminals in the bg think im ascending

[@arenomusic]

One Hour of Jerma985 Rants (to zerk off to)

[@prod.bbx666]

jerma def snuck some shrooms and thought everything was magic

[@vamppanic]

“the aliens” are to jerma what “the killer” is to wendy williams

[@vamppanic]

also… planet fructose 😭😭

[@silksapphics]

i actually fell asleep to this thank u

[@sequoyahhopkins2948]

thank you. you're a godsend. I can now finally sleep

[@Liz-rt2rh]

I thought falling asleep to jerma rants was more of a rare thing.. I love this video