Hey Barbra! I’m Abby! I’m a pre-missionary as well and am leaving in about a month! I noticed that you said you need to prepare spiritually to be able to get through things! And I agree that we all need to prepare spiritually but you can get through things with being where you are at! I went through a break up too and a whole bunch of similar things as well. And I didn’t feel good enough, and felt that I didn’t improve either. But I realised something. When we give ourselves to the Lord, we find much greater power within us that we maybe didn’t know was there. “He that shall lose his life for my sake, shall find it.” I’m not sure if that was all the way correct but Barbra, you have the Savior on your side, by you, carring you! You WILL make it through this because you are the daughter of a King! I believe you and relate to a lot that your going through! If you ever want to talk, let’s find a way too! ❤️