PDA and School

The third video in this series on PDA Pathological Demand Avoidance Syndrome. This presentation focusses on difficulties of PDA children in school and how schools will need to respond.

[@lanni8224]

My kid was the opposite, she completely would have a meltdown after school, had to play teacher as soon as we got home ,very strict teacher ( she was ) depending on the day she had . But very much almost a compulsive display of high arches Unwilling to compromise in any way , aggressive anger crying . homework was not an option. She was a runner , this all took place in the home , car, family’s house and with play dates . if to many demands were made, then fiscal rage on me (mom) after first grade she started loosing friends and that’s when school refusing started in the end of 2nd grade . Her anxiety was so high, I could see this was not just a child having trouble. My experience seems a bit different from my what I’m hearing . She was always “strong willed “ and what looked like sensory issues, she has both with ADHD and Autism .

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

No two people are the same. Diagnoses are 'best fit' or 'what is available' sometimes and there is a risk of over assumption that they will respond to the strategies that worked with someone else with the same diagnosis. PDA strategies tend to work well with all children regardless of diagnoses but with the caveat of sometimes! You might be interested in my article about the spectrum nature of all diagnoses which suggests a more over lapping nature to diagnoses than often is portrayed. Available at: happylearners.info/diagnoses/diagnoses-spectrum.html

[@msf60khz]

These children can be intelligent and superficially good at social communication and are frequently charming. The PDA can flare up with phenomenal violence on random occasions and can even prevent them doing things they want to do.

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

You are completely right and this makes them incredibly challenging to work with. If you don't use the right strategies with these children you come up against an impenetrable wall of defiance. Even with proven strategies they remain volatile and it takes a good measure of both patience and flexibility in order to move forward with adult directed learning.

[@lanni8224]

@@HappyLearnersInfoI feel like this was sounding to simplistic, it’s a constant balancing act for whoever gets the job of the “safe care giver “. Or trusted adult .,

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

@@lanni8224 I completely agree with you. Individuals with PDA are more nuanced than any presentation can hope to explain. Strategies can make a big difference to how much adult directed learning is achievable but it can still be a very small percentage of the individual's time that you can direct.

[@amaebarnes]

Is it possible that a PDA girl could mask during school hours as to go undetected for years, other than having a learning disability, but at home, the girl has exhibited these severe behaviors since she was a toddler? And is now a teen

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

Thanks for your question. The short answer is probably no. The diagnosis of PDA would describe someone who is universally presenting with PDA behaviours across different settings. So a girl should struggle with compliance in school settings. That would be the official answer however as all pervasive development disorders are determined by a specific presentation of behaviours that can be observed there is always a cut off point for diagnosis. Thus you are either PDA or you are not. But this then leaves those that nearly fit the diagnosis, those that still present with many of the behaviours but not all or not always or not in all settings. How do we label these individuals and is that even desirable? So my longer answer is that people can present at times with a set of behaviours that would fit a particular diagnosis and this might be helpful in understanding the behaviour and identifying potential strategies to support them. However, if it is not pervasive it is probably not helpful or useful to place them within that label. That said it doesn't diminish the difficulty for parents in managing a teen or any other aged child with PDA or ODD type behaviours. My last point about PDA is that normal strategies don't tend to work but PDA strategies often work for PDA and all other conditions so it probably worth having a look at these on the website. Come back to me if you have any follow up comments or questions. Stephen

[@kelseydouglas2254]

Thank you!! I just had a meltdown incident with my pda daughter while I was at work she comes to daycare with me it was horrible she would hit and follow me I had t do the autism hold on her it’s so exhausting thank you for all the advice

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

Hi Kelsey, thank you for your comment. I imagine that it can be very challenging having your daughter at work with you. If you need any further specific advice use the Happy Learners email and I'll be glad to try and support you further.

[@adoreyourcorephysiotherapy]

I can’t get my child to generally go in to nursery now.

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

Hi, thanks for the comment. Getting a PDA child to do things they don't want to is very challenging. It is far easier to let them pursue their own agenda. Thus if your child wanted to go into nursery this would not be a problem. Establishing why they do not want to go in should be a priority assuming they have good verbal skills to articulate how they feel. Liaising with the nursery to establish a positive handover with perhaps an emphasis on doing an activity of their choice when they arrive might help. Remember PDA children often respond to a 'higher authority' so having written down rules about going to nursery might also help. See the website page about PDA strategies for other things to try. Hope this helps.

[@ttt-jp2ej]

how can i get a printout of the video above please

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

Thanks for the request. I have put a pdf print out of this up on the website. You can find it at: happylearners.info/diagnoses/pda. You'll need to scroll down to resources - PDA and school - printable version.

[@ttt-jp2ej]

@@HappyLearnersInfo thankyou so much - now to start on the journey for our son !

[@HappyLearnersInfo]

@@ttt-jp2ej Good luck with your son. Let me know if there is anything else that I can do to help.