Monster Factory: Horrors of All Shapes and Sizes in Blade & Soul

Griffin and Justin make a couple of Monster Factory children in the new MMO Blade & Soul, but end up getting completely shut down by Big Analog.
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[@doctrow37]

Rat baby: *does a sexy pose* Griffin: ok we’re both going to prison

[@penbailey9677]

i wanna like but it's already at 420

[@bowlofpasta8846]

Someone already ruined it

[@penbailey9677]

@@bowlofpasta8846 gdi well i can like it now

[@leiram8833]

Not only that, but we're all going to prison for looking at it

[@spacetearable]

If you make my nose this small, I can't smell your sins, Daddy.

[@smfpr]

"Take it up with God" might be a solid official tagline for Monster Factory.

[@fartsharter]

no, i think it's "that's a funny trick to play on god."

[@janesmith1840]

@@fartsharter True story, the first time I heard that I laughed so hard I almost fucking died in real life.

[@Ray-hk1zm]

@@fartsharter W h y n o t b o t h ? I s w a s t e l a n d , n o r u l e s !

[@theelectro6812]

my god your right

[@xXluluchanelXx]

@@Ray-hk1zm "No rules, just right, Outback MONSTER FACTORY!"

[@omgeodude]

The difference between Rat Baby and Succotash reminds me of what I've read about estate defense in ancient China - how you'd have the little dog patrolling the grounds looking for intruders, and if they found any, they'd go get the big dog. At the same time, I can't help but feel it'd be inverted in this case. Lumbering Succotash strides across acres in search of that which shouldn't be. If you're caught on those grounds, the grim visage of Rat Baby fades into view, inexorably, but slowly enough that you've got all the time you need to regret every decision that put you in front of her. Anyway this is very good! Thanks!

[@rynemcgriffin1752]

omgeodude And she whispers into your ear her vape secrets while in the distance Succotash glides around screaming his name

[@MYLAR.]

this is horrible! Thank you

[@birb5306]

who are you and what have you seen

[@KuraiMuin]

Yes. Thank you.

[@crustacrank]

wow

[@pogostickjackson]

when i say I'm genderfluid i don't mean between "male" and "female" i mean between rat baby and succotash

[@sethescope]

there are more than two genders, but rat baby and succotash are the only two that matter. I think we can all agree on that.

[@fwoqma]

inside of you there are two wolves

[@mumpas-1043]

My gender is The Final Pam

[@sethescope]

​@@mumpas-1043that's a strong gender and I'm happy for you

[@debdebberton]

Rat Baby is wuch a weirdly enchanting name and i want to incorporate it into a tattoo somehow

[@christopherhale3140]

The entirety of the "Hello pervert" conversation is hysterical, but my favorite part has to be the fact that the voice Justin is doing is basically the same voice which he now uses for Beacon the Talking Sword in _The Adventure Zone: Amnesty_

[@taliad.9761]

Christopher Hale that is literally the only thing I was thinking in that scene...it was just...ALL Beacon

[@Alexandr.ine2005]

Beacon would call someone a pervert. Metal bastard sword

[@AndGoatz04]

*_The loli effect_* It's just a thing i made up with no purpoise Or purpose. But definitley no dolphins

[@demoniccats5217]

But also Doug Peterson: profession demon

[@levigallagher5042]

you're so right and now that you've pointed it out I cannot stop laughing

[@ariw9370]

"A ship in a harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are for."

[@flowerman581]

Marsha Kollie that's like an old old saying

[@duncanurquhart5278]

f

[@GrixieKong]

I want a McElroy Quote a Day Calendar. Please and thank you.

[@Silverwind87]

You're rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, my friend.

[@WritingOnGames]

That's a really good point Griffin - I guess I've never blamed god for rats before.

[@chosentonessournotes]

I haven’t laughed so hard at anything in my entire life.

[@guij666]

This quote is just constantly playing on loop in my head.

[@leiram8833]

I've never really blamed God for rats. But I have thanked her.

[@Silverwind87]

@@leiram8833 Why would you say something so controversial yet so brave?

[@johngreen8344]

Is anyone else here from the 'If Two Phantom Thieves Were On The Moon And One Killed The Other WITH a Rock, Would That Be Fucked Up Or What' fanfic? It sent me here to see Futaba's Fursona.

[@neontenebrae1918]

my stomach and lungs hurt from laughing so hard "If you make my nose this small I can't smell your sins, daddy"

[@xCreativeCraftingx]

I'm so glad you commented this because I skipped ahead way too soon.

[@FredKongFooey]

Honestly I can't get over how the voice for her was basically a 1920s New York Gangster.

[@calebhughes975]

I know I'm a tad late here, but legitimately I looked away to talk to someone at that point. Looked back 45 seconds later and she was a rat demon. The McElroys are both a national treasure and also need to be locked away forever.

[@mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452]

PLEASE give me a timestamp

[@julesced]

oh my god, SUCCOTASH had me screaming!!!

[@ZombieTurtleInvasion]

"aw beans, I look like a real goober" kills me every time

[@Kazzzack]

7:10

[@leonardmyers1674]

i’m glad that you guys turned the loli pander race into something genuinely enjoyable rather than pervy and weird like the devs probably wanted

[@dizzyd4310]

If you don't use that race to make a horrible chinchilla toddler demon then what is even the fucking point

[@hickorymccay2994]

Hello pervert!

[@shadowlucario7125]

"genuinely enjoyable"??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?! that rat is going to be in my nightmares now. usually monster factory makes horrible things that are somewhat disturbing but that rat is my sleep paralysis demon

[@PinkApocalypse]

I’d take rat baby over a panda loli any day

[@ashrishaw5435]

The fact that at 14:57 you can hear Griffin lean away from his mic bc he actually checked to see if his computer took quarters like one of those old timey saloon pianos is hilarious to me.

[@peachy1392]

this comment is so funny to me. this comment is killing me. did you forget what an arcade is

[@leedraconis5793]

peachy NOW YOUR COMMENT IS KILLING ME

[@xXluluchanelXx]

@@peachy1392 i'm giggling too. who opts for quarter-operated saloon piano over arcade machine? this wonderful weirdo, that's who

[@brookebleazard73]

blade and soul just seems to be the equally horrifying anime cousin of second life

[@cherryr9285]

it is and its so worth it to play for the terrible

[@rynemcgriffin1752]

Borna Japundžić With a character creation system like this? How can it be a bad game?

[@divinecervine]

ohhhh b&s WISHES it could come close to the treasures that second life holds

[@jorjeezealien]

Well, it’s a completely different genre of game so..

[@sycastells1212]

8:30 - 9:30 is Justin's revenge for "Daddy like a pretty baby"

[@LimeyLassen]

I thought Rat Baby was gone forever, but Succotash was the rainbow angel who saved her from the darkness

[@rynemcgriffin1752]

Limey Lassen Then as soon as he came, he was gone. He was taken into the skies by angels to be one of The Final Pam’s many boys

[@Bearpigman]

"You've been squelched for spamming the chat" Well, thank god they obviously have their 'chat spamming' problem TOTALLY AND 100% UNDER CONTROL RIGHT FELLAS?

[@haydenward082]

I was thinking the same thing the whole time, you couldn't see a damn thing from the gold farmers and account sellers. WHO EVEN RESPONDS TO THOSE!? RAT BABY HAD IMPORTANT FACTS ABOUT VAPE LIFE BUT YOU GOTTA SPAM SELLING GOLD!

[@Jonny5rd]

For a minute, KZbin was at a taller aspect ratio and I could totally see Succotash's face. And some boom mics.

[@SugarDelights]

The same thing happened to me while watching a night at the museum clip :/

[@Gekiganger03]

+Jacob Hildebrandt I gotta say, I understand this joke, and I think it's wonderful.

[@greenteapoetry]

BRAVO!!! (and **greatjob**)

[@Gigan83]

+Jacob Hildebrandt NICE

[@gelotologistgrandma3791]

+Jacob Hildebrandt travis was totally in the right about that. it's a projectionist fucking something up and it happens more often than you'd think. i was very angry about this and i had to tell somebody sorry

[@reecountry720]

i was on a cross country trip for christmas and the road was icing up and it was raining very hard. as the passenger, i pulled out my phone and started to watch this video, because i wanted the last thing i ever saw on this planet before i were to slip off the road and die to be fucking rat baby

[@Owen.Fallon]

So did you die?

[@reecountry720]

Egg i wish

[@Owen.Fallon]

@@reecountry720 you'll get em' next time champ

[@z.m.stewart1996]

Succotash is honestly one of Griffin's best voices like I pulled my headphones out upon hearing it...it's such a complex nuanced voice it doesn't even sound like our sweet boy

[@linussextips1]

"why do you play an MMO if you didn't want to trade vape secrets?"

[@greatpower6063]

Vape is how we all learn to rogue xD

[@maggsmarineverdancy7262]

"It looks like she's about to telepathically strangle Bill Pullman" I have no idea what this means, but I can *feel* its meaning deep in my soul

[@michaelknapp5149]

I don't know if you actually wanted an answer but it's a reference to the Aliens from Independence Day

[@maggsmarineverdancy7262]

@@michaelknapp5149 well I certainly wasn't EXPECTING an answer but i can't exactly say i didn't want one... it definitely helps me understand the joke better, thanks dude!

[@xXluluchanelXx]

@@maggsmarineverdancy7262 thank you for asking so this thread could be here for other people :3 and to remind people like me with bad memories who've seen Independence Day thirty times that this is what the joke was about. because I didn't get it either.

[@sethescope]

I know this is an old comment, but this is the problem with thinking. thinking means you want to understand it, but trying to understand just gets in the way of knowing

[@Dollop_of_Mayo]

Rat Baby is what would happen if Yoda and a Precious Moments hellchild were put into a genetic blender with an entire bottle of ether and there was a button on the blender that read "Pulse & Accept Sins" and it got held down for a really long time

[@greatpower6063]

yes xD

[@VWWNN]

This is 3 years old and still true

[@deffdefying4803]

Oddly specific but completely accurate

[@indigohalf]

I love that you managed to make hideous mutant creatures in such an obnoxiously pretty game. You're doing the Lord's work.

[@landlordize]

I don't know, those cat familiars were pretty damn horrific. Honestly id rather have rat baby as a pet.

[@Primalintent]

Visually this game is unironically disgusting. Not just for the pervy bits, it's so oversaturated it hurts the eyes.

[@katyjammiestudios2332]

When he said “ meet the loser of every season of rupauls drag race” I died laughing

[@edmortis]

holy fuck I can't believe they didn't notice how Rat Baby's upper eyelids kept like wiggling up and down on their own it's like super uncanny im dying

[@jjju3]

I don't think ive laughed harder than i had the second griff realized he could name that uncomfortably horny cat "vape life."

[@fishiest3539]

the phrase "i can see his mouthy-mouth gummy-works" haunts me

[@clairevanhofwegen]

Justin's mournful scream for succotash at 19:24 sends me into the astral plane everytime.

[@tmmw1975]

Hilarious that you got silenced, but all the gold spammers didn't. Big tobacco indeed.

[@RainbowLizardOne]

Succotash for smash

[@Kodocha7]

Succosmash

[@trevor7520]

Smashotash

[@edmortis]

HE'S THE BEST CHARACTER. IN. THE. GAME, WAKE UP AMERICA!

[@rynemcgriffin1752]

rainbow_lizard *SUCCOTASH GLIDES INTO BATTLE!*

[@Lishadra]

IT’S TIME FOR SUCCOTASH

[@rorygiambalvo2955]

"He looks like the Crypt Keeper is trying to sneak into a rave in the old west" I love Justin's comparisons

[@momoandmiz]

2:10 dude can drive from the backseat, he can slamdunk from the 3 point line without moving, boy can literally reach for the sky

[@kyleserafin9616]

This is why I only trust Polygon for my investigative reporting. They're the only video game news outlet with the COURAGE to stand up to BIG TOBACCO #vapelife

[@QuikVidGuy]

Kyle Serafin they're just a front for Big Succotash

[@RailfoxStudios]

Succotash walked so Rat Baby could run. Rat baby ran so Succotash could fly.

[@fodo987650]

I am genuinely scared of Rat Baby

[@GothKiitsune]

Michael Burd same

[@rynemcgriffin1752]

Michael Burd we all are Micheal, we all are

[@dizzyd4310]

Rat Baby is my sleep paralysis demon

[@DrFunkman]

As you should be

[@zednotdead]

Succotash is such an underrated monster. I keep quoting "WAKE THE F UP, IT'S SUCCOTASH" years after this Monster Factory.

[@Lishadra]

Arby, Succotash, and The Final Pam have to be my favorite creations. I can’t even figure out why I like ‘tash so much. Arby is easy, he’s my dad, and The Final Pam cannot be disliked, but ‘tash is a mystery to me.

[@sethescope]

I love our dad and his one wrasslin' tooth so much

[@Parallacks]

griff-dog's favorite word in his life is "boy"

[@jodorambam]

Well so is everyone's favourite word

[@abbydoesart648]

*boi

[@PinkApocalypse]

8:55 Justin brutally rips out my soul by saying Daddy in Beacon voice

[@AxelLeJeff]

Go figure, Succotash has arms perfectly adapted to life in the clouds.

[@jessical3031]

2:00 HE HAS YAOI HANDS

[@teaerrors360]

it's illegal to stay that about succotash. hand over your joints

[@catbug8509]

oh god Jesus that sentence just sent me back to sixth grade and I’m not pleased about it

[@Hoonters-goona-Hoont]

This series made me realize that abusing character creators is a pretty good way to get inspiration for drawing cartoon characters.

[@betaprotocol]

URGENT REQUEST: Can someone make a gif of Rat Baby stabbing the Marlboro Man with a vape? Need it for a PR campaign I'm trying to get started.

[@rynemcgriffin1752]

Nicholi What kind of fucking PR campaign are you running

[@jetpackcthulhu]

Ryne Mcgriffin a damn good one, apparently.

[@LunchBXcrue]

Succotash is from space jam

[@powdgaze]

hes the secret boss battle in nba 2k16

[@Robolobster]

I want to see Monster Factory cosplay. Like, really bad

[@powdgaze]

TIP TO TOE, JUST LIKE BART

[@kreo45]

theres actually a lot of Final Pam cosplayers, as well as a couple boy mayors+totino's

[@princefleaswallow5182]

Superindeed I've done a Boy Mayor before!

[@hazeltade3679]

Superindeed I saw a Final Pam at C2E2

[@non-binarycoding5505]

i've seen someone attempt to do truck shepard and the whole process looked like a safety hazard

[@nyarg33]

AT 23:40 SASUKE RAN PAST THEM AND I CRIED REAL JESUS TEARS

[@BrianRabadue]

Correction: Sasuke Uzumaki. Is he some strange combination of Naruto and Sasuke? Their adopted son?!?! Who knows.

[@jm98]

@@BrianRabadue that's Naruto's husband, Sasuke, he took the name of his so

[@MEWtiful]

"Hi! My name is Brian and I got an "A" in tying my shoes in kindergarten" I'm dying

[@Maplestarknight]

Fun Fact I was playing Dnd once and the DM summoned fuckin Rat Baby to vape in my character's face while the other player was away. I lost it

[@exist4046]

HSHBABSBSBNDJHDBS

[@ultravioletbyte]

jesus cockmongling christ i haven't laughed as hard at anything in my life as hard as i did at SUCCOTAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH like shit i legitimately almost vomited. kudos to you guys

[@chastermief839]

really love that the devs were willing to put up invisible barriers to keep players from gliding into areas they shouldnt be, but are totally cool with leaving all of the other cliff ledges as potential death traps.

[@SW33wNecie]

* Pet the Succotash Succotash has gone where no Tash has gone before.

[@NikoshiSenika]

i love the sound of justin just fuckign DYING in the background

[@Arrakiz666]

Ah yes, Baby the Rat, the most iconic Sonic character.

[@beeshirt1399]

I absolutely adore that Griffin and Justin have no time whatsoever for this game's sexist, fetishistic bullshit and immediately get into dismantling the trope completely.

[@packleaderjeff2142]

I get the fetish bit, wheres the sexist bit at though?

[@koreycat]

@@packleaderjeff2142 the part where the girls are all half naked??????? how do u not notice that

[@packleaderjeff2142]

selome Thats more perversion than sexism, Sexism is more of a predjudice and stereotype deal. I can't really say what you're thinking so if you want to have a chat that would be cool.

[@lamriavabel5019]

I’m a girl and I don’t think it’s sexist ._. And men and blade and soul have revealing outfits as well. Equality 👌😩

[@koreycat]

•Lamri Avabel• what does the fact that you’re a girl add to this??? so am i??

[@Gigan83]

Those boys are going to jail this time.

[@jodorambam]

Toe to tip that's my Bart boy

[@MrAfroDoug1]

Generic chibi character evolve to one of the Powerpuff Girls then, someone feed it after the midnight, and it turn into a squirrel gremlin.

[@Coyoteari]

And now we know where Justin got his Beacon voice

[@thebadpoet]

Beacon is a Tim Curry impersonation. I know this comment is two years old, but I feel like all McElroy fans ought to be fully versed in Curry’s oeuvre to fully appreciate their craft.

[@iamafriendly]

I'm not gonna lie i click +like before i even start to watch monster factory videos now

[@dadoohan]

+Sean McNally - They never disappoint.

[@selenefrost6267]

the first face of succotash genuinely made it looks like a monster that out of a creepy pasta or a cryptid

[@Pandatege]

we got a two for one deal

[@Pandatege]

YOU CAN ADOPT FURRIES TRYING TO PASS AS CATS JESUS

[@zachn.2608]

OH MY GOD IF YOU LOOK UPSIDE DOWN AT 11:13 THEY'RE TOTALLY RIGHT OH MY FUCKING GOD

[@ariw9370]

I LOOKED TOO AND I'M REALLY TRAUMATIZED

[@molly16474]

PH MY FOSCKIFN GOD THATS THE SCARIEST MONSTER IVE SEEN ON HERE YET

[@someneet145]

Out of everything to come out of Monster Factory, my favorite thing is the line,"Sorry rat baby, you had your chance, and you fucked it, it's time for Succotash."

[@colorblindartist5238]

11:20 "It looks like it was turned upside down, but like fixed in post" Me: *Immediately turns phone upside down* Me: *Cant unsee what I have just see*

[@Skelemeter]

Monster factory is legitimately my favorite series on KZbin holy shit

[@COWHATE]

Look, I love all the precious creations of the factory, but I have an actual hard time looking at Rat Baby.... I'll take Truck at his worst any day over Rat Baby.

[@rg5580]

Ratsterisk Baby

[@20firebird]

these are the worst cats i have ever seen in my life

[@mrweatherby]

Monster Factory - "Take it up with God."

[@GoldKnightProduction]

10:47 At some point during the Rat-Girl creation, she became Shirley the medium from Courage.

[@queerty7]

Dude omg😭😭😭😭

[@tymakesart9555]

Succotash didn't die to not get a rating.

[@carnivorousjazz827]

My favorite part about when it descends into something terrible at 8:20 is how Justin stutters once when saying it. It's like he knows he's about to say something fucking awful and go down a terrible path, but commits to it anyways.

[@cydneyking7453]

Once in a blue moon I awaken from a dreamless slumber to my brain going “ssSSSUCCOTASHH”

[@ProfessorFudin]

I just realized that Succotash is like if the Monstars drained the talent of competitive dancers in 1970

[@z.m.stewart1996]

succotash sounds like sober gamzee, and I hate him for that because it's 2017 and I was just forced to type the word "gamzee"

[@asocksual4910]

Nice

[@okokpokjijpij1242]

The end of 2019 is here and I was forced to read the word "gamzee"

[@djfebrezee]

Welcome to 2020, and today I learned who Gamzee is.

[@CallMeIshfail]

@@djfebrezee :o)

[@simplyvibing3742]

It’s 2020 and I thought the same thing

[@piixeltune]

"he's just a skin boy"

[@bicarbonat1]

Justin steady creeping out Griffin & Griffin's despairing responses never fail to give me one of the best laughs of my life 💀

[@ashleighcalvert8937]

this is such an incredible episode so many highs and lows, narrative arcs and timeless themes, it’s one of the great works of our time

[@waffleless]

I still think Vape Life is more of a Monster than your creations.

[@wintermoons1215]

This is without a doubt my favorite episode of Monster Factory. Complete gold.

[@aliza_h]

19:00 "A ship in harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are for." SPITTIN LIFE LESSONS RIGHT HERE

[@Hawwwlucha]

Why am I not surprised that there's gold spammers in this game as well

[@fatherandstorm]

My college friends literally all get together after class on fridays just to watch this show. I could watch it forever.

[@malachimusclerat]

you guys gotta do saints row 4. please.

[@friend_xtra]

NO. SAINTS ROW 2. IT HAS THE MOST FREEDOM.

[@SpectrumHazard]

+Mike Spud Monster Factory is a show about FREEDOM!

[@friend_xtra]

+Richard Rominger AND DRASTIC SLIDER CHANGES.

[@SpectrumHazard]

Mike Spud NO MIDDLE SLIDERS 2016

[@musical_daredevil]

+Mike Spud Also the best cheats

[@thebadpoet]

As a costumer who works with middle and high school students, the line about a middle schooler doing old age makeup is perfect.

[@Dylanquinn666]

"Look, I can see his gummy works!" Absolutely losing it! I don't think my heart can handle all this laughter xD

[@Best-Match]

You guys are so funny that you made getting stuck in the world, like, consistently hilarious. Even though nothing was happening. For, like, minutes. I'm so impressed

[@_teagan]

the very first old guy face looks like the butler from the aristocats that tried to kill the cats

[@morgank.6113]

Edgar. I always thought the poison soup he makes for the cats looked really yummy.

[@Oenator08]

my friends got into this game hardcore and they pulled me into it last night and as i was playing i was like "wait where have i seen this game before" and then i jumped off the cliff during the tutorial and couldn't figure out how to revive and i was like "ah yes. J and G did this in Monster Factory. I'm gonna go watch that shit again" and here we are

[@eliasen1550]

I Love that Justin's voice for the chipette is the same voice that he uses for Beacon in amnesty.

[@myettechase]

her name is rat baby.........have some respect for our troops 😔

[@invadervantas]

so apparently its possible to laugh so hard you LIterALLY throw up

[@plushs]

I've been watching ~4 episodes of The Adventure Zone daily, so now whenever Justin speaks I imagine Taako saying it. 8:27 - 9:21 was so much funnier because of this.

[@ryanmattox7408]

These two look like they’re about to try collecting the bounty of Monkey D. Luffy, Roronoa Zoro, and the crew of the Going Merry.

[@gallicancourier5035]

I need the Succotash voice in my life way more

[@sanguillotine]

Is anyone subbed to polygon for anything other than the McIlroy's?

[@vexced8753]

CaptainZapperz to be honest I didn't even know there was anything else

[@KaeFrost]

Of course not. What a silly question.

[@thrownstair]

Yes. ... There’s also the Jackbox videos.

[@thethetheo]

Brian David Gilbert

[@zach7482]

BDG

[@jackwilson3303]

I demand an updated precious children poster.

[@liampendergast8670]

New Monster Factory episode! Everyone stop what they're doing!

[@electricdanish912]

"I goofed up very good" Is perhaps my favorite expression in the English language now--it's so subtly crazy.

[@evanholt1752]

I want an animation of Duck from TAZ: Amnesty holding Beacon as it just yells “You’re a pervert”

[@BillBodega]

Bigger eyes = Bigger targets.

[@NuYoukai]

I fucking lost it when he flies off the cliff and flips until Rat Baby dies.

[@milesa5347]

please oh my GOD i need them to play new vegas !! edit: and ratbaby looks like a lavendertowne drawing of a fallout ghoul.

[@vd2485]

*looks at rat baby* Anime was a mistake