Positively Proving People Wrong!!! With Annie Elainey [CC]

[@AnnikaVictoria24]

I definitely relate to the defiance!! My rheumatologist told me after getting diagnosed that I shouldn’t go to uni, or if I did, be happy with just getting passing grades. So I was like “I’ll show you!!!!!” And got such good grades I kept getting awards 😝

[@HeyJudie]

I had an opposite thing happen. My rheumatologist wouldn't give me a parking placard because he thought it would lead me to "thinking I am disabled." On good days, I can walk for ten to twenty minutes. On bad days, I can hardly walk.

[@kairaul2695]

a tip : watch series on Flixzone. Me and my gf have been using them for watching lots of of movies during the lockdown.

[@fjordsi7404]

I love love love love LOVE this video

[@jesscary3022]

How do you know what she's saying, do you lip read? It must be hard if you're sitting side by side? Sorry if this is a stupid question, i am just curious. Also sorry if it is rude somehow. This is a lovely video, important

[@deb_lal_]

It's so hard sometimes with mainstream body positivity stuff because a lot of it is in the realm of "don't focus on how your body looks, focus on what it can do," and I was just starting to get comfortable with my body in that respect when I started really losing abilities, so that sort of threw my whole body positivity thing off of its foundation. But learning to feel like I deserve to exist, I guess, has really made a difference? And teaching myself to ask for help when I need it has weirdly made a huge difference in terms of loving myself, because I can both avoid putting too much pressure on my body, and I can see how willing people can be to help me, and it helps me feel like I do matter, and that my less-than-perfectly-functional body isn't a problem. Also, taking baths more often helps, cause the more time I spend with my naked body, the more used to it I get! Lol that's a little bit of a weird one but it makes a big difference.

[@theannieelainey]

Ahhhh! Thanks for having me on your channel! Love love LOVE these conversations with you!

[@olgachronics3273]

Annie when you said about what would you tell yourself if you were a friend, that's the advice I give myself and everyone I know when we are being too hard on ourselves. Also you look so cute in this outfit :)

[@HeyJudie]

Annie I'm a fan of yours! I also have hEDS and am losing abilities, I also used to have an eating disorder.

[@lindsaymixer8043]

I’m always fascinated hearing about this stuff, because for me it’s such a non-issue. I’m autistic and honestly cannot picture my own face or body to be self-conscious about it. Every time I look in the mirror is a surprise, like, “oh yeah! That’s what I look like.” And then I promptly forget again. It’s so odd. My personal baggage with my chronic pain is just feeling like my body hates me, and then hating it in return. It’s like I’m at a constant war with my joints, where I want to be doing something and they’re saying no and I get so angry and frustrated with it. I’ve been trying to be kinder to myself in that regard, but it’s a tough thing to change.

[@wolf1066]

OK, that eerily reflects my experience. I've noted for quite some time now that I seem to have no consciousness of how I look at any given time and I'm often surprised when I look in the mirror.

[@AnnikaVictoria24]

THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY UR BOTH SO FREAKING CUUUUUUTE!

[@joannaerhardt7294]

2 beautiful ladies inside and out! Great video! I have depression so I use positive affirmation every day. I tell myself " I rock! I got this! " and I dance like a crazy person A LOT to very loud music every day. Helps a ton! 😘😘😘😁😁😁

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Excellent plan! I too find dancing always helps my soul feel good 💃🏼

[@sarahwithstars]

I love that Jessica is always talking about defiance... When I was really struggling at university and went to ask for help I was told I could drop out and defer until next year... But I wasn't sick in a way that I was going to feel better after taking four months off and then be more capable to go back and do the exact same crazy exhausting process& routine again but at a later time. I needed the routine to be slightly modified; the days to be slightly shortener or to have fewer assignments set and due the exact same weeks... But when quitting was the only suggestion (because what else is there to suggest to a disabled person right?!?)... It really became a "well screw you, then" The work will be top notch, but you will have to receive it on tear stained paper and pay through the nose for separate exam invigilation my doctor will demand and replace my vomit bowl for me in that 4hour lab session you won't split between 2sessions for me. Ha! Watch me succeed as I suffer!

[@Agoraphobication]

Just so you know, retraining your brain is literally, physically what you're doing when you start doing affirmations and similar things. Your brain wants to take the easiest route, for everything. There are literal, physical paths in your brain that correspond with thoughts you have on a regular basis. In order to form new pathways in your brain and ensure the others go unused, you retrain yourself to make those new paths the most common ones by sticking to those thoughts every day instead of the negative ones you want to get rid of. Fun facts!

[@theannieelainey]

Agoraphobication love that!!!

[@niamhseren9913]

Agoraphobication neuroplasticity👌🏼

[@lovepeaceisneverguaranteed7385]

Well said positive affirmation is key to positive living✌

[@NullitasAmare]

I'm lucky that I've never had body dysmorphia. I've overweight, but hey, that's kinda my fault, and my bum is still a 10/10, so HEY. I'm working on losing weight. I noticed that people idea of motivating me is "agreeing" that I need to do it, but while that's fine and all, they'll start insulting chunks of my body. Like wooooah there, you say one more thing about my thighs, and I'm pretty sure they could slap you on their own. Dontchu insult Thunder and Lightning. They have to carry around the weight of my bullshit all day, they dont need your negative-nancy nonsense.

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

Omg! 😂 I love this comment and I love you 😍

[@NullitasAmare]

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard I love you too! 🤣 That's the power of powerful thighs. They bring joy around the world!... And themselves, of course.

[@lindsaymixer8043]

I love that you named your thighs that’s such a power move ❤️❤️

[@rebeccaude4412]

Tessa Ladd -This is the kind of attitude I need to learn how to adopt!! You rock! 🤗💜😘

[@c.a.1506]

that does it. i'm naming my thighs.

[@ItsRadishTime]

everything i've ever accomplished in my life was because someone told me it was not for me, so, relatable. love you both!

[@shannonhensley2942]

I loved my body as a child.i started out really unhealthy. I wasn't given a proper diet of breast milk/formula as a baby. so my body started out as frail and unable to cope with things like protein. As I got older and worked with the doctors I got healthy enough to eat and be active and not crap my pants in the middle of the night. And by the time I was five I was able to be properly potty trained. However since I started out so bad my body tries to keep as much fat in as possible aka I'm fat. And by the time I was ten my whole family decided to make fun of me. Put me on crappy diets that made me feel like I was dying. And by the time I was a freshman in highschool I stopped eating breakfast, lunch, and threw up dinner for 6months. I lost 60 pounds and for the first time everyone including adults outside of my family would tell me they were proud. All made me feel worse. By Christmas I felt like I couldn't hold it in anymore and by the next school year gained it all back. I'm now 21 and still can't say I'm beautiful out loud. I still can't look at my body as if it were mine and that I love it. But I'm working on it. I still get family that loves to discuss my weight. I still have strangers talk about how fat I am. But I'm working on me. I can now look at my self and realize why it is the way it is. And that I've come along way from the baby that would puke and poop at the same time because I could properly digest food.

[@Eva-dy9qy]

I'm so glad there are other people who compliment themselves when looking in a mirror (particularly fellow femmes) - a tiny part of me always felt oddly guilty and selfish because of it and this gives me motivation to up my compliment game further!

[@joysfulljourney]

I love this video. As a mentally ill person who has always struggled with body image (and eating, because of that) it's pretty hard to conquer the negativity that comes from outside and from the inside. Also feeling like your body isn't right because it isn't what you picture yourself as. It's important to talk about that.

[@toastburntbread]

I remember in highschool, before id look up into the mirror, id tell myself im hella hot or really pretty and then look and what would stand out to me would be the features i liked. It was my coping mechanism.

[@emmae6184]

As a someone losing my eyesight I’m so glad I’ve started watching both of your videos they are so helpful!! They’re some of the best affirmation I’ve got :)

[@lunastella3592]

Your channel has helped me come to terms to the fact that my mental disorder is a disability and that that isn't a bad word. Thanks for playing such a big role in my pathway to self acceptance. 🖤💕

[@camilledumas1961]

Personally it's hard for me to love my disability, I feel so frustrated being in bed most days, unable to work, drive and even less work out... I love your positiviry, it really gives me courage. Personnaly I'm still struggling to establish my diagnosis recognised ( EDS) and getting my disabled card (I"m in France and getting an official diagnosis can take years and years). I can still walk, even on bad days so most people around me have no idea I'm disabled... and even I, sometimes, have a hard time accepting I'm not abled...

[@camilledumas1961]

I also feel guilty for not being disabled enough compared to other people with EDS who can't walk anymore or had to go through surgery... I feel so tired but nothing seems "that wrong" to justify me staying in bed. And yet, each time I get up I feel too weak and dizzy to do anything.

[@sonipitts]

>Some days you feel like you're too sick to exist and others you question if there's anything wrong at all! OMG this. Some days I am, to all appearances, a highly functional, energetic whirlwind of productivity, and others I sit at the kitchen table like a bolt-stunned cow, stupefied with pain and exhaustion just from the effort of getting out of bed and making tea in the morning.

[@shalacarter6658]

Yes! Sometimes I consider doing things to make me look disabled when I am going out! lol! Jessica has a great video on "being disabled enough."

[@sonipitts]

yes...until the next time my knee forgets how to knee between one step and another, lol. Or I wake up after 8 hours of sleep feeling like I got hit by a bus. :-(

[@shalacarter6658]

Me, too! Or I say I felt like I slept in a cement mixer!

[@1015SaturdayNight]

My disability is a gift that causes me to look at other problems as relatively insignificant. That's been a blessing. Since RA causes a lot of pain, hot baths and showers are involved in my self care - I also have an alternative look so I've spent a lot of work finding things that fit my mature-yet-goth style that are very comfortable and not constrictive or scratchy. I am very happy with what I've come up with, right down to my adjustable rings for hand swelling days :) I also have a makeup hobby since that's what I used to do for a living - I can't do it every day, but when I can, I express creativity that way and it brings me a lot of joy. I also try to remember that my disability is not a terminal illness and to be grateful for that, it helps me to not be angry. I try to get joy out of self expression and and that helps with body image.

[@kiororonoa9062]

I don't have any disability, but I look at myself in the mirror every time I dress and I have to say it's such a good exercice to do ! I also smile at myself in every mirror that I see and I am like "damn this smile guurl !"

[@emmymorris7648]

“No. Screw you. This is my body. I love it. I don’t care what you think.” Love this response Jessica! 🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@ameliabarton1444]

got here even though i was in the middle of another video. being proud of your disability is never a bad thing. i said the other day i love my disability i dont get it why if you have a body affecting disability you need to be ashamed they didn't get it.

[@HannahoftheMist]

Oh my goodness! Thank you guys so much for the collaborations, I was so happy to see two of the humans who make me the happiest when I'm online, together in one place!

[@Jahleesu1]

Since my disability started to get worse 2 years ago i have a hard time loving my body, because often i feel all it brings me is pain and suffering and weird stuff. I've 'let myself go', meaning i don't wear make up anymore, don't do my hair and mostly wear jeans and hoodie.... before i really loved to wear dresses and make up and everything... Maybe it really is time to start doing a few of the stuff i learned in therapy again to learn to love the new stuff my body can and can't do again...

[@rebeccaude4412]

Jahlee Su -Been doing the same for 2 years when my Lupus turned into Lupus with Autonomic Neuropathy & several other immune conditions. I just look at my makeup bag, I can’t fit into 95% of my wardrobe, but I also can’t do exercise to lose weight. I cry in my closet, & I know it’s vain...I just wish if my body is going to fight me at every minute, can’t it at least do it at the size I was my whole life until this?! Plus, it’s not just a little weight...I’m 75 pounds heavier than my normal, & you can tell that my frame is small, so it’s not just vanity, having that much extra weight is extremely unhealthy! I would love to wear sundresses & skirts again..but I also don’t see the point when I can’t work & rarely go out. I really need an attitude adjustment...but I really REALLY hope you follow through, even if you start 1-2 days a week. It’s one of the things I ADORE about Jessica..she says she feels horrible in a video, but looks spotless & put together b/c it makes her happy. We all deserve to be happy..put on a dress, do your makeup & then don’t feel any pressure to go anywhere, just sit & read or watch a movie..whatever your body feels like doing. Maybe I’ll get there one day too! Much Love dear! 🤗💜😘

[@jebjeb121]

I love this channel so much ❤️❤️

[@seaborgium919]

I'm a little bitter about that defiant attitude. Because too many people assume that's how the entire world is, so you end up with teachers who'll purposefully abuse students in order to push said children to "prove the teachers wrong" and then you end up with kids who have life long PTSD because of it.

[@Adam1984_]

As someone with multiple physical disabilities, most of which are very visible, "you said I can't love this, so I will goddamn love it!" hits home harder than almost any phrase I've ever heard in my life.

[@humore9679]

Yessss - you both made such good points in this video! Coping with mental illness and apart from that a long long history of "being to skinny" I could relate so much

[@jessicaoutofthecloset]

🙌🙌🙌🙌

[@tessaplooijer4302]

Humore

[@rebeccaaira5045]

i could stare at jessica lip reading all day

[@nope6021]

Lol I also had someone basically grab me by the shoulders and ask if I was okay. I have bipolar and when I was 13 to when I was 15 it was super bad and I had no help on it. Then my close friend and ex pretty much dragged me into the school counselling office, which then linked me to my doctor and he linked me to a government therapist. Now I've just turned 17 and while I deffinitely still feel the bipolar and anxiety, I know how to live with it. I have a job that I enjoy and am no longer crying behind the customer service desk like at my old job. I'm becoming more physically healthy and am motivated to work towards improving my body to make it what I want. I want to get a tattoo of my family's birth flowers on my thigh to cover some old scars. I've also learned who the main tattoo artist in my town is so I can work towards getting an apprenticeship under him to become an artist myself. Friends and family are incredibly valuable in the recovery process. If it weren't for my ex I wouldn't be a functioning human today. I might not be alive today. And I value her dragging me to a counsellor despite my protests so so much. Because I'm here, I made it and now I can live a happy life with this mental illness. It's amazing what knowing what is wrong and how to deal with it and live in a positive manner can do for someone.

[@shalacarter6658]

Hi Jessica! Hi Annie! Hi Rachel! How do I deal with my physical and mental disabilities and body image? Well, mostly I stay in my room. If I must go out, I try to put on at least mascara (currently missing) eye shadow, and lipstick. Then, I never never let anyone take my photo!!!! I stay behind the lens. It's so confusing to feel skinny 16 and see that I am old and fat. I do like what you said about loving your body. There is a passage in the Bible about treating your body as a temple. Part of that is knowing what is harmful and not doing it. For example; say you are allergic to nickel and cannot wear jewelry with nickel in it. You pay a bit more to buy sliver or gold or titanium. So, why would you go to the dentist and allow them to put nickel in your mouth? Because you don't know it's in their! You end up with an immune reaction. And never know why. Off to see Annie's video. Jessica, check out the TedTalk I sent you about the segway. XO

[@JuMixBoox]

I really love this video. It just showcases your impressive attitude so well. You are an inspiration!

[@MikoDiane]

💜 love your vids. You are so positive and funny... Yet dark. I like it. 😁 Jessica's Box.... Could be a great movie

[@disabledandfab]

Oh my goodness I needed this! I've gained a bit of weight since using a wheelchair...but I don't always hate it. It's just me, you know? Weird cracking joints, stretchy skin, slightly pudgy tummy and all. I'm still working on loving myself, but this definitely helped. Thank you!

[@screaminmeani]

That Chronic Illness Life hi. I'm not in a chair but I've now got my 3rd ileostomy (had one got it reversed x2 then a 3rd "temporary" one) I also want to be happy to be I able to do more and embrace my body and love myself though I'm now covered in lumpy scars. I've started dressing differently and trying to make myself feel "pretty" again. I also want to set a good example for younger people about being body positive/disabled/an older woman and not being ashamed.

[@ItsDevore]

I'm sooo skinny. I've always been. It's not about mental illnes or something like this. It's about fast metabolism. I eat enough, even more and its SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hard to gain weight. I can eat a lot and don''t gain any weight. But people still trying to tell me I'm not a woman (!!!), I'm not sexy, no man will want me as a girlfriend cuz man is not a dog - he won't want bones. I've heard many times I'm skeleton etc, people are laughing or staring if I will go out in dress or skirt and it was hard as f#ck (it is still hard) to go out in short, skirt, dress and feel good. People are sure that if I have underweight (I should weight 15kg more) I have to be sick (anorexia or not mental illness), when my body is totally healthy, probably more healthy than their bodies! I had blood tests and everything is ok! I don't get why people are not okey with MINE body, when I'm totally okay?

[@Wednesdaywoe1975]

If you are ill, and living your life in ANY way, you are putting in the same effort as an Olympic athlete. In short, FUCK the lazy haters who say you need to do more.

[@karynwhy]

i've been trying to figure out a tactful, gentle way of saying this but i don't know if there really is one--my feelings about my body are very complicated because i am very disabled and very fat. when annie was talking about seeing a "600 pound monster" in the mirror, she was talking about seeing something that wasn't really there, but there's no words for hating your body when the monster you see in the mirror is the reality. like, i'm genuinely huge, having been fat my whole life and gaining a massive amount of weight in my 20s because of medications and losing the ability to exercise consistantly. i can't be diagnosed with dysmorphia because i'm seeing myself accurately, i've just been taught my entire life to hate that. i have found peace with the way i look, and have practiced a lot of radical self acceptance because of my disability and size, but a massive part of society thinks i deserve to hate myself and feel bad because of what they see when they look at me. people think i am lazy when i can't walk, but it's actually due to chronic intractable migraine, not laziness. people see my size and think that everything i can't do is out of laziness, hassle me because of my disabled parking placard, deny me medical help i need because my weight is obviously a much bigger priority than my debilitating neurological condition. my size and disability intersect to cause a lot of BS in my life, and that's very hard to cope with. people think i'm only human if i'm actively hating myself and desperately trying to change myself.

[@mirhazelife7579]

Love from Malaysia. I'm so glad that I found your channel. You give me motivation & inspiration. Thank you :)

[@tashabunnell7052]

I just want to say that I love your Chanel and everything you present. It really does help life my spirit and is a reminder to love myself, be better then yesterday and to just laugh.

[@ikatibearr]

Two things have made my day so far: petting a doggie at work, and this video.

[@angiem6383]

Hi Jessica! Hi Annie! I'm so happy u two did a collab. I've been watching both of a u for about the same amount of time (between a year or two). I know what u mean about proving people wrong. I had undiagnosed learning disabilities from preschool through graduation. My parents didn't want me to go to college. I think they thought I was too delicate. ( I was diagnosed w/ IBS & TMJ at 16 & depression at 22. Eventually I was diagnosed w/ fibromyalgia at 24.) They also couldn't help me at all financially. My first semester at community college, I was diagnosed w/ a learning disabilities. I received 3 As & 1 B ( I had an 89.9 in the class. It still grinds my gears.), while working 3 part time jobs. I was so proud of myself. Still am.

[@Mary-op8hi]

Oh my gosh two of my absolute favourite youtubers TOGETHER IN ONE VIDEO?! I'm the one who's #blessed

[@LordKiwii]

Yess a new video!! Been feeling pants all day and am couch bound so this is exactly what I need!! 💕

[@noanewman5237]

I worked on overcoming my eating disorder. I struggle with binge eating. Dealing with that I have been able to lose about 100lbs./45kg. For the first time in my life I am no longer overweight or obese. That is based on a body fat percentage of 23%. I have a ton of muscle so according to BMI I am still obese. BMI is not an accurate measure of your health.

[@rueriddle]

you should set that room of boxes on fire. I have never really hated my body but I have sure been mad at it a lot. Trying to do low impact exercise because I have not been happy of being inactive and I can't do what I used to do. My Mum bought me ( bless her 83 and still wanting to take care of me) an adult tricycle designed for seniors. Long story short , it's really easy to peddle. I love this thing. I go for an hour ride every night. I am going to take auquafit classes too. Recommended by a rheumatologist. So yes, I don't hate my body, I just have to learn how to take care of it better

[@calicocavalier2254]

I love you, Jessica! You are the shiz!

[@rebeccaaira5045]

i watch your videos to remind me to feel good about myself

[@w0tevajessie]

Talk about sex and disability!

[@HotPinkSun]

I love you both so much 💖💕😭 I’m like tearing up watching this - such beautiful babes.

[@shesvalentine5209]

Your channel is so wonderful and sweet and I am very thankful for your positive attitude and advice which has helped me overcome personal struggles in my life recently. Keep up the good work and have fun doing it!🙂

[@isak7216]

These body-positive videos always make my day, and may I say, you both look killer in this video! ;-)

[@wowlily1245]

I love you, Jessica! You're beautiful, intelligent, funny, you're an inspiration. Thank you for your videos. I hope you never stop. Have a great time there!

[@benediktadavitaalyani8937]

never been this early! love you jessss

[@trinityh.2352]

Benedikta Davita Alyani *-same-*

[@lv4eva1]

Wow this video couldn’t at a better time I’m really struggling with my mental health at the mo and finding ways to cope there’s a lot of crap going on up there and I’m feeling lost and alone but this video gave me a little lift so thank you so much xxxx

[@ninadirnimiezenberger5072]

Thank you both so so so much! I will probably be re-watching this video a hundred times, every time I'll hate my disabled body, which is ummmm....often.... This was so uplifting, motivating, touching, informative, soothing, and a lot of fun! You Ladies are truly beautiful, in every way. I made a 'contract' with my body, telling it, "Ok, listen, we're stuck in this together, so let's work together. I'll be kinder to you, and you'll be kinder to me...!"

[@rebeccaude4412]

Nina DirniMiezenberger -That is genius! 💜

[@ninadirnimiezenberger5072]

Rebecca Ude Thank you!!

[@rebeccaude4412]

Nina DirniMiezenberger 😘

[@AstroVee]

Ahhh, I love love love seeing other disabled folks talking about disability and especially learning to love yourself with your disability. I have made a few videos on this topic, and you two put into words a lot of things that I have difficulty putting into words. I love my body and am grateful for the fact that it works (to a degree anyway!). I try very very hard, as you said in the beginning, to consciously make peace with and love it with all of its quirks and bits that other people might not think are that great. I think my disability has helped me with that a lot because in some ways it forces you to accept your body just because there are a lot of things you can't change about it. Thank you so much for making this, hearing other disabled people talk about things like these is always super interesting and helpful.

[@shandabraxton8507]

💜💜yes with the positive vibes!!

[@olgachronics3273]

I so RELATE to Jessica, like i'm more worried about what my hair looks like than the fact that today I cant walk without a mobility aid. And when people ask me how I manage to have such a positive attitude towards my illness I just shrug and say I dont want to be sad and miserable so I gotta look at the positives.

[@kachnickau]

Jessica, I just want to let you know that you definitely CAN NOT make videos for 20 more years :))))))) ♥

[@BeverleyButterfly]

This is such a good video it’s true society has impossible standards for well people so for those of us with disabilities it can feel like so much we can never achieve and on top of that we can’t see in the mirror what they hold up as how we should look. It can be so hard but I have found since dressing vintage, and running my channel and blog have really helped me to get some self confidence. I’m going to start saying nice things to myself in the mirror like you do Jessica that’s a great idea! Xx

[@kirk93814]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!270,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jessica shall be made a Dame one day!

[@NightmareB4Kayla]

The pastel vibes 😍

[@kathiebsn]

But……..did they accept things like a toilet seat that they DONT need??? A life alert buttoning when they don’t need it???? I’m fed up with this

[@ThirrinDiamond]

One thing i have now that my autoimmune disease is gone (thyroid) is that it's much easier to not hate my body, because rn we're on the same wavelength of trying our best and just trying to be healthy and somethings off. I know somethings off cus my body is going "YO SIS IM BARELY HOLDING IT UP IN HERE HELP" and im like "that's fair.... *waits for doctors for 84 years*" But yeah once it stopped being my body attacking itself, it's like i've gained a friend who knows exactly of my suffering and is going through it with me. Me? Distance my mind from my body? Think of them of separate entities? Always.

[@crystalpistey-lyhne3406]

I've found that so called" Disabled"" are special ablities and are Wonderous and Beautiful no matter what. I taken twenty something years to except my Cerbal Palsy and Autisim. I'm also a GBLTQ Lady!😅🤓🌈🏞🌤🌷🌞

[@readyplayerpaws8065]

YyyyAaaaSsss Queens! Wish I could have afforded vidcon 💗💗💗

[@howdyitsren]

I found tattoos hugely helped with my body image. I have CRPS. Pretty much is makes on of my legs not work, just dragging along, being very painful. I had a huge struggle with my body. I was loosing muscle, I wasn’t looking strong. Moving was so hard and I ended up not eating as much. Partially because of medications, partially because of weird brain stuff. I was 5’7” and weighed just about 100lbs. Then I started getting tattoos. All of a sudden, I was decorating my body. I was celebrating it. It became a canvas and a vehicle for beauty. The feeling I got after my first tattoo was euphoric. I was decorating my body. It was about a meditative hour that distracted from my CRPS, full of self reflection.

[@monstergirlinc8707]

Ive noticed whats helped a lot with my body image is making self praising jokes. Its pretty popular to make self depricating jokes, but even tho they are just jokes, they can kindof solidify insecurities you have about yourself. Self praising jokes may seem kindof vain, but it really helps with mental health. Plus since they are less common than self depricating jokes, people find it funnier.

[@86fifty]

I know I'm very late, came here from Annie's channel, so perhaps the gender dysphoria talk isn't as relatable for this audience, but I do have a point to add about it! I only really understood what 'loving yourself' meant by playing a videogame, for the first time this year, where you had to create your own personal character. Up till then, I'd only played games with established protagonists. Watching my boy, that I MADE MYSELF, to look as hot as I could manage with the game's tools, running around and fighting things and losing his hair and gaining it back (yes, it was dark souls 2, but that's not important right now), it made me really understand what religious people mean when they say, "God made you this way, so you should love your body!" Because I made that character, and I wanted him to be undressed as much as possible, because his body was lovely and his eyes were pretty and his hair looked /so/ good! But I also got the sense, that perhaps he, if he could speak, wouldn't have liked this body I gave him, for whatever reason, outside his control. Maybe he wanted to do more with magic, and I made him a bow-user. But still, I wanted him to be fully /himself/, even if he was unhappy with what he had, because I made him, and /I/ thought he was beautiful, and there's definitely no one else like him in the whole online world. :) So even if he was sad, or zombified, or panting with exhaustion, he doesn't have to be anything /else/, that all of that is okay, since all of that is /him/, and he is special, he is mine. It was easier to understand what 'parenting yourself' means in the context of gender dysphoria, after I'd projected it onto a completely fictional person that I'd made myself. Just my recently-learned life lessons I thought I'd add.

[@bethanykennedy812]

OMG, I love Jessica! I do that too sometimes with the I'll show you. I did go to college with a sixth-grade reading level due to dyslexia and ADD and go hey I think I'll major in English literature. But I also can barely look at myself in the mirror because I weigh 300lbs. I know that I do have an eating disorder. I know that I was put on medication for a misdiagnosis by the way that caused me to gain over 100lbs. I know I have insulin resistance secondary to my PCOS. But somehow I just can't shake the idea that it's my fault I'm fat and I should be ashamed. I think I'm going to try that mirror thing. By the way, I'm generally a positive person. I feel like I come off negative in these comments because I share the awful things that have happened to me. I mean sure I do often wish that I was never born. But I was and I have a right to exist and to make the best out of my life!

[@ItsDevore]

Hello Jess! Another aweosme video :) I can't stop watching you! You are sooo beautiful! On another vid I asked you what deaf people think about hearing ppl learinng sign language. Now I see this comment as higlighted ( I'm not sure if author of the video can highlight comment or its automatic). If you did that will you talk about this topic and that's the reason ocmment is higlighted? If not - I will be grateful if you can give me the answear :)

[@TeaTime97]

I have such a disconnect with the part of my body that deals with ability and that deals with body image- I'm so much kinder about the ability part. Body says we can't dance? That's okay! We'll dance later! Body says you're about to pass the fuck out and you need to lay down? I love the floor!! Body says it's hard to lose weight? Well look here you lazy little shit- It's a little horrifying to hear the difference so frequently, but right now I'm at the stage of recognizing that no one else is echoing that voice. People who look like me aren't any of the things I tell myself I am because of the way I look. I'm not an exception, but you know "easier said than internalized." (ash hardell)

[@JusticeAnimeGeek]

Thank you so very much! I love you both. My health has been on a steady decline. I'm currently on the journey of diagnosis. I have no doubt that I have EDS hypermobilty type. You made my day though :)

[@Demisayshello]

I cuddle with my dog because no matter how poo I feel, my little Spaniel will always want cuddles. On days my EDS is really bad I just stroke an ear. Good thing about spaniels, plenty of ear to stroke!

[@cassn8725]

Hi Jessica I just put on Annie's page how much I enjoyed your collab videos you have such fun together but discussing important issues also. Thanks. Also your channel has helped so much with your strength and positivity and discussions on disability and your vlogs helped me a lot. I have discovered a disability later in life so your channel has been a lifesaver. I identify with you and feel less alone. Thank you.

[@shesgotthatsomething]

Honestly clothes are such an important thing for me! When I was a kid, my mom always made me keep the clothes that didn't fit me (because I gained weight) for "when I lost weight" and I'd always fit in these uncomfortable clothes because I wasn't supposed to gain any more weight and it made me feel like crap. One day, a friend lent me an XL shirt and I wore it and it felt so comfortable and cute and I didn't nitpick my body and I realized that I've carried that mentality for so long - that I wasn't allowed to buy things that fit me because I didn't have the body type I was supposed to have. I've finally bought clothes that fit and it's such a nice feeling! I love feeling good in my body and feeling like I don't have to hide!

[@shalacarter9330]

Hello Jessica! I have just come from Hannah hodgsons KZbin channel. She is finally back online after a several-month disappearance. I was so glad to see her face because I thought she had died. Would you please ask all of your followers to go to her KZbin channel? She is trying to get a drug that will help her when her joints pop out. The information is all on her Channel and there is a petition to sign. God bless you dear!

[@alecwinner]

I love that attitude, it's really inspirational, not in the bullshit "oh you're disabled, you're an inspiration!" way, but in the, i'm disabled to and i'm inspired to love my body because fuck everyone who says i shouldn't.

[@sarag592]

I suffered from eating disorders and depression and anxiety throughout 90 percent of my high school years. One day after a really bad day I was looking in the mirror and crying and didn't want to continue on with my life. I saw my eyes glistening with tears and I thought what beautiful eyes. Then I took down my crazy waist length hair from its bun and thought what beautiful hair and so on I kept complimenting myself everyday and years later I'm much more confident and strong and happy 😊

[@ellygreen244]

I’ve never had great body image, because I know that they way I look has nothing to do with my disability, so (this sounds so bad but it’s how I feel sorry) I know that there’s no excuse or reason for being over weight. But I understand what Jess is saying. Everything I’ve ever done really well is because someone told me I couldn’t, so maybe I should try that

[@sipos0]

I assume (and I obviously could be completely wrong here) that people used to imply that you shouldn't love your body how it was, or whatever they were doing, because they were worried that it might have been as a result of an eating disorder. I, as someone who has a bit of a food addiction (not an addiction, but I love it too much), and who has always been ideal or above ideal (or quite a bit above ideal) weight, used to find it hard to understand how people could be underweight through anything other than choice. I think that many more people struggle with being overweight than underweight (usually with less difficult to overcome reasons perhaps) and, as a result, it is probably not uncommon to share the ignorance I had as a child/teenager about how hard it can be to put on weight if you are underweight. I'd guess this is part of the explanation for people's odd behaviour which may have undermined your body confidence. I'm just guessing though. I assume it wasn't just a deliberate attempt to be nasty, and this seems, to me at least, a plausible other explanation.

[@joanams8353]

Thank you so much for this video, I needed this today. I deal with chronic pain and mental illnesses, and I'm autistic, and I love my body and my brain but sometimes it's really hard to remember that... I'm having a bad day today, and I've been cursing my brain and questioning the reason why I'm like this and why I can't be normal like everyone else, but I just have to remember that I am who am I because of my disabilities, and I would never change who I am, even if I struggle because of it sometimes.

[@samonieke]

Have you heard about Simon and Martina? Martina also has EDS and created the #buildaladder on instagram. Their chanel is mainly food related and about Japan but they still talk about positivity and taking care of yourself when you are at your worst. Especially in the last month they opened up about their struggles. So i do recommend!

[@sipos0]

Is 8 bows too many? No, no it isn't. While it isn't quite true that there can never be too many bows, it is pretty hard too have too many. You always look amazing in videos - the epitome of good taste, so it is hard to imagine you looking weird. I don't believe it happens.

[@beancarjac]

I remind myself that my body is me, so as to remind myself to be kind and compassionate towards all aspects of myself, including body parts. I think this is important because there is a tendency to distance my mind/self from the body and thinking of the body as separate somehow. When I think of the body as separate it is very easy to judge it harshly. But, when I think of my body and self as a unified whole, I am much more sensitive to being gentle, loving, and kind to it.

[@emmymorris7648]

My coping mechanisms for a bad day where I still have to get out for doctors are wearing bright colors like hot pink and purple and fun patterns like paisley, colorful earrings that match my outfit because being matchy matchy makes me happy and then throwing on my favorite blood red or hot pink lipstick and then I automatically smiling more even if I’m pale as heck and in horrible pain. And like Jessica said I will also give myself compliments in the mirror when I’m washing my hands on a bad day and say out loud how much I love my hazel eyes that I got from one grandmother and my smile that I got from my other grandmother etc. I also agree with Annie about speaking to yourself as you would a friend. If I’m in a flare up and am tempted to start saying negative things to myself I’ll ask myself if I would say that to my mom or best friend when they are struggling and if the answer is “No” then I reframe it and list off three positive things instead. I also do a lot of writing that helps me a lot mentally even if I can’t get out of bed to get outside and take tree and flower pictures that day. Writing gives me something fun to do (if I’m not having a migraine anyway) that helps while away the time and lets me be creative even on a harder day and that helps me mentally and emotionally a lot. And I also use positive affirmations and a gratitude journal too 📝📝

[@unspokenvoices3399]

“I feel like I’m living in a body that doesn’t represent what’s inside” I resonated with that so deeply...

[@EveryDayALittleDeath]

I don't really like my body, but that's not really to do with the way I look. It's to do with my chronic illness and how my body and immune system just... don't work properly sometimes. It's really hard to love something that causes you so much pain. I also have mental health issues as well, so that could be part of why I can't really make myself love my body.

[@Jess38044]

While I don't have that level of defiance, I do have an unconscious will to live that has so far been more stubborn and insistent than my suicidal wishes. I don't really have many coping mechanisms, and of what I do have, not all of them are healthy. But I do have this, and it's the one thing that keeps me going. I can't drown it out when it arises, even if I try (and I have tried).

[@niamhseren9913]

Fabulous body. Honestly think acceptance is so much better it’s not giving up or in, but slowing what is to be.

[@maghouinbeg5011]

My body is not at its best this morning. However, I have these wonderful hands that show love. So far they have held my husband's hands, stroked the face of my child, petted the dog, and later on, these will be the hands that knit some winter woolies for refugees. These are hands that show love. And a body that can show love is a very good body.

[@rowdyhunt5938]

I cannot understand mean hateful people. Do they think it makes them cool or feel better about themselves? In reality it only shows them as an ass with a inferior intellect. I always thought that after high school That's when life would begin and could leave all that hatefulness behind but 20 odd years later still there not as in the open and blunt but still there. I truly admire and have great respect for you and the way you don't let your disability's own you.

[@im19ice3]

when i don't feel well about my body i imagine it in a painting renaissance style lying luxuriously eating grapes minding my own business and i think,well it might not be for everybody but some would consider it art and the peak of beauty and elegance so, i might just pick a side myself and art is the one i like best

[@CatBarefield]

super cool video as always! Annie seems like a lovely human being. also, its a pleasure to see the subscribers count go up and up and up with every video!

[@sonmihae-joo6286]

Yay, great video, it was super interesting and such an unexpected pleasure to see you two collab ! :D

[@shalacarter9330]

Hi Jessica! You do know that you are the only person who could pull off post migraine brain fog don't want to get out of bed look.

[@ttaibe]

I do volunteer work as an experience worker. there is so much positive attitude I can take and use from these vids XD. ty!

[@rebeccaude4412]

I am struggling with body image to a very unhealthy point. I have NEVER been the weight I am right now (thanks Gabapentin), mostly b/c I am unable to work, exercise more than a slow walk, (although I am going to try and follow a beginners YOGA course that is online) & of course medication...Heaven forbid I need to start a steroid taper😢. However @annieelainey ; what you just said, “I feel like I’m living in a body that doesn’t represent what’s inside”. WOAH GIRL...you stated my feelings perfectly! B/C on the inside I’m a dancer, an athlete, a damn good Radiologist, the 1st to plan or RSVP to a party & I know..I TRULY KNOW it is vain, but on the inside I’m thin..just like I was my entire life until hell broke loose. I’m @ that anxiety state where I do not want ANYONE (including my hubby) to see me, I hide in my house & I will find any excuse not to leave it for fear of running into a past colleague. Thank you for making this video, I know I have a long way to go, but I’ve never heard it phrased so perfectly & that really hit the nail on the head. I am just now letting myself be open to coping strategies, & reading books & quotes by amazing people with disabilities & learning that spending a couple years being really mad about is ok, but I’ll be happier if I learn to change that attitude, that is where I’m starting. Any book recommendations are very welcome!! Much Love to You All!! 🤗💜😘

[@retired1049]

I wish I could like this comment more than once. I'm not sure exactly what it is about your comment, but it really resonates with me. Thank you so much for writing this comment, it really means a lot to me.

[@rebeccaude4412]

Ronan Laughlin -Aww, thank you sweetie! I think this is one place we can comment how we truly feel & (most of the time) not be judged, but actually understood! I hope that whatever you are dealing with, you know it’s ok to feel however you want about it & then hopefully one day there will be a lightbulb that turns on & you have an “AH-HA” moment. What Annie said was exactly the feelings I’ve never been able to put into words until now. 💡, LOL!! Take care darling!! 🤗💜😘

[@retired1049]

Rebecca Ude -- I wish the Internet were like this more often. The world is filled with so much negativity. I think it's time that we just shrug it off. Thank you for being so kind, it's what we need most right now.

[@rebeccaude4412]

Ronan Laughlin -AGREE 100%!! 🤗💜😘

[@katsadventures5132]

I legit live and love myself and just do stuff out of spite and to prove people wrong. Graduated from high school out of spite of that school cause they kept trying to kick me out.