*Next-door 10x Software Engineer* [FULL]

[@programmersarealsohuman5909]

➡️ patreon.com/programmersarealsohuman So much more one wouldn’t believe it

[@ClashClash89]

hire more/better marketing people. your shameless selfpromotion still needs a lot of work to become efficient. ^^P

[@kuematah6300]

Is that the openssl bug that you were talking about?

[@75hilmar]

Always playing 5d chess they never know what hit them

[@audas]

Make another episode. In fact - just start a channel with this guy.

[@abhia2810]

"We inject the software in the customer's windows distribution" well...that aged well.

[@Darqonik]

Prophecy :D

[@bezbos]

Crowdstrike lol

[@egoworks5611]

😂😂😂😂

[@unl0ck998]

"3-4 hours, if you leave the room maybe 2" Brutal!

[@CristianVasquez]

accurate

[@channel11121]

3-5*

[@JinX0011]

Planning to work that into tomorrow morning's standup meeting.

[@janpaul74]

but *very* realistic ;-)

[@ololh4xx]

1 hour if everyone stops asking

[@scarymonkey3496]

“Why was my phone so hot during the demo” “The android version mines monero in the background”

[@codenocode]

lmao

[@sumitmangar8563]

😂 hot potato coin

[@pdchives3356]

:'''''''''''''''''''''D

[@Shpongle64]

I was actually thinking of this. Make an app totally free but I get a 10% usage out of the phones processing power towards mining whatever I want.

[@CHURCHISAWESUM]

@@Shpongle64is it.. legal?

[@TheOriginalJohnDoe]

"What about making it readable" - "Who else needs to read this?" Welcome to the life of developers.

[@q1337]

"Who else needs to read this?" ah I wish I asked myself that question on behalf of myself now, 2 years later, with variables named var1, var2 , tempvar1 and functions function1, function2. It works perfectly though

[@shreksthongg]

@@q1337 lol yeah that's pretty intense

[@bot7845]

@@q1337for a computer

[@BigTarkus]

@@q1337 god awful

[@q1337]

@@BigTarkus it's for the humans, computers don't mind. We all do this when we are beginners (or too advanced to be human) or simply don't care for small programs.

[@MR_Stick]

"Its my library" that's a flex

[@Coach-Solar_Hound]

except... He built a library that doesn't fit their use-case LMAOOOOOOO

[@KillahMate]

It doesn't even fit their use case! He just built a library for the hell of it and then didn't even make it fit their use case!

[@puckwang6850]

@@Coach-Solar_Hound life-hobby balance, that's savage

[@LibertyMonk]

It's a wild flex. The guy is insane, but he doesn't let work crunch ruin his off time.

[@zarkonesmall]

"I rewrote all the things to Rust. Performance wasn't better so I rewrote it back."

[@honza970]

Sounds like a skill issue.

[@jameskingcodes]

Cope n seethe ​@@honza970

[@darekmistrz4364]

@@honza970 Real 10x engineer can make javascript perform better than Assembly

[@PhonkEcho]

'Compilers always be complaining' had me dying laughing🤭

[@jameskingcodes]

@@honza970 cope and seethe

[@ItsHeroGamers]

Compilers do always be complaining fr

[@pif5023]

Truth, they are worse than managers

[@rentristandelacruz]

they do be like that all the time

[@joseph0x45]

fr fr

[@revcrussell]

I haven't coded in 20 years and this still hits.

[@Lasershark666]

@@revcrussellI haven’t coded and this still hits

[@ayudxt]

Don't touch this , it's part of our infra.. lol

[@asnifuashifj91274]

that's his HSM programmed in baseboard LOL

[@JohnVance]

DIY FIDO token

[@tobiadeniji6630]

He's running the database on a raspberry pi 😆

[@mattropolis99]

Ah, good old knowledge silos.

[@JohnVance]

@@mattropolis99 We call them knowledge “towers” 😆

[@LibertyMonk]

"Publicly!?" "Yeah, but it's *super* performant." Yeah, fair enough.

[@pedxing]

"it's my library." best line period. there is so much lore created in just this one statement. a complete other life that only they know about. love it.

[@everything-bagel]

I like how he has a massive monitor, but chooses to dev on his laptop most of the time instead.

[@monad_tcp]

Not enough neck strain when you use your big monitor instead.

[@SteveOnTheInterweb]

Those nvidia drivers messing up again

[@arcan762]

I do this too for some reason

[@4lpha0ne]

Same here 😅

[@phoenix-tt]

Surprise surprise, but it's a TV! I think this was part of the joke

[@GabeHandle]

"you're good at front end too?" triggered me. I got PTSD from working with a 10x dev.

[@TragicGFuel]

Im curious what's it like working with one?

[@JasonRobards2]

@@TragicGFuel It's endlessly upping the expectations so you'll want to work yourself to death.

[@TheClintonio]

I used to be that 10xer until my divorce where I chose to my use my higher productivity to lower my hours and spend the rest of it doing nothing because fuck it. Not doing that at my current job though because it's an amazing role.

[@TragicGFuel]

@@JasonRobards2 that still doesn't provide much insight I'm afraid :C

[@JasonRobards2]

@@TragicGFuel Like Gabe told us: PTSD. Either you continiously start thinking you are not good enough, or your boss will casually compare your performance to the 10x. Also, from working with such declared geniouses I have learned it is far easier to hack into 10 different languages/ecosystems than having to figure out what the genious cobbled together. But hey, try explaining that to your boss. The 10x'er was the one who made everything possible, who are you to go against him. Most of the time, they are quite resourceful people though. Just not infallible.

[@Burgo361]

Only missing the part where they get bored and move on leaving chaos in their wake

[@tommydowning3481]

Not only have I seen this IRL, I've actually been that guy. I quit and they hired two people to replace me. Both of them quit within six months and they had to effectively discontinue the product. They lost literally millions in revenue because they wouldn't give me a measly $15k/yr raise.

[@dave6012]

“Who else needs to read this?” 😵

[@strider5402]

@@dave6012 💀💀💀

[@kb-zealot]

It's worth just paying more $ to keep them, they won't leave if they don't have a reason to and knowledge-transfer never actually works

[@tommydowning3481]

@@kb-zealot Exactly. Given the handover costs and the massive decrease in productivity when losing a 10x dev they'd be better off pretty much doubling the dev's salary and they'd still come out ahead. Sadly in my experience middle managers are typically midwits who are incapable of recognizing 10x devs. Just like in the video, they don't make a fuss and make it all look so easy.

[@eliaserke5267]

- Not everything needs a kernel patch, I just turned it on and off - What is that?? - Custom linux Had me cracking :DD

[@constantinefedotov8394]

- Is that your diploma? - Yeah, I needed it for a visa. So true 🌚

[@Bigpapspsosoodww1234]

ICE has your location and is en route wee-woo 👮‍♂️ 🚨

[@koerperkontrolle]

@@Bigpapspsosoodww1234 Because illegal immigrants worry about their diploma lol

[@oventi_]

​@@Bigpapspsosoodww1234joke's on you, ICE can't touch me.

[@cluelessturlte1512]

@@Bigpapspsosoodww1234 visa = legal btw

[@doctorale84]

that's the only use I ever got out of my degrees

[@NFSHeld]

"Have you updated the Jira board?" "We don't need Jira anymore, I emptied the board anyway." "You emptied it?!" "Yeah I deleted all the items I did last weekend."

[@flamakespark]

"...we use tru-edge, we inject program into windows distro" - the first punchline and it's already perfect 😂

[@Ganerrr]

im a 10x dev with adderall except it just makes me unaware im taking 10x longer to do everything

[@deviansee]

did not expect RL people here :)

[@Ganerrr]

@@deviansee one day i will be known for programming and not car soccer

[@deviansee]

@@Ganerrr i hope the amount of successful projects you have will be higher than the amount of flip resets you can do. The ability to grind is definitely there, so its just a question of time :)

[@Beknown107]

NO!

[@gtdmg489]

"We're two javascript frameworks away from actually launching this" yoo I'm ded 💀💀💀

[@ishanjoshi319]

"I'm horrible at coding", guess I was a 10x developer all along!

[@zaneflow]

The SSH vulnerability bit actually came true 💀

[@Tom-sq2yy]

and will again

[@GrandBoss2]

It gets worse because I think he said SSL...

[@monad_tcp]

I only used Haskell once, no one noticed, but there's an important routing piece of software in which $200M of transactions per month is passing thought it, no one knows how to do maintenance on that. I call that : "my retirement plan".

[@eyezikandexploits]

Youre never getting fired

[@ferchrissakes]

With a username like “monad_tcp” i suspect you’ve used haskell more than once

[@Dredge22]

@eyezikandexploits he will still get fired, they just won't know what hit them

[@opticalwipe-]

I like to think this whole channel is just some guy procrastination from actually writing his first line of code.

[@PhilipAlexanderHassialis]

As someone who is on the other end of the spectrum and I am procrastinating from actually writing the architectural documents, I *think* I may have to go the "cba work, lets do content shit and see where it takes us". In other words, you are onto something here, but not in the way you actually pictured it.

[@itisWhatitis12345]

His reaction to hiring a project manager lol

[@Brandanus]

"product manager", project managers are easy prey

[@hamsandwich780]

The writing as always is good, but the disaffected focus of the lead guy is the most real thing I have ever experienced. I have definitely said "I could have it done in twenty minutes, if you leave"

[@Dredge22]

One of my really good bosses left to do his own startup and the replacement they hired was an MBA type. Constant pointless meetings to discus things that would have taken less time than the meeting to complete. Got tired of him wasting all my time with these meetings (and 6 other devs) so I just started speed running all the jira tickets every meeting. Took about 3 times and those meetings were "no longer mandatory for me"

[@alexjjgreen]

Our entire stack's on a Raspberry Pi3 B+. Count yourself lucky.

[@plaintext7288]

"Any load is high load"?

[@alexjjgreen]

@@plaintext7288 It start to glow white hot after about 25 concurrent users. Our current infrastructure protocol is sending a guy out to buy a bag of ice that it can sit in at peak times.

[@SamVidovich]

If you want to have cloud infrastructure, you must first invent the universe. This should only take 20 minutes or so.

[@lukor-tech]

I didn't expect that reference but I highly appreciate it.

[@monad_tcp]

That's because you didn't use Perl, there's already a SU(2) library. Its called SuperUniverse2. Actually its Special unitary group, its the math you need to create a universe.

[@pseudolullus]

@@monad_tcp my quarks need more color man, add SU(3) at least

[@kikivoorburg]

@@pseudolullus and don’t forget to throw in some U(1), I mean what would the universe be without radioactive decay?

[@zarkonesmall]

"i wrote our own crypto. Just to be safe."

[@JanSoltan-wj1hs]

💀

[@bleack8701]

"who else needs to read this" Can't be more true. You know, just job security

[@Beetny]

"They're using Arc browser. We don't need those investors" 😂 facts

[@dr5t3v3]

I use Arc and I support this message.

[@allahinperson6071]

Why’s arc bad? Thought about trying it but forgot

[@davidhollenbeck1674]

@@allahinperson6071 idk if it's bad, it's just like who do you think you are, use chrome like the rest of society

[@AGentooUser]

@allahinperson6071 Because it's proprietary garbage and doesn't support Linux

[@mischiefner]

@@davidhollenbeck1674 honestly, fuck Chrome

[@wherami]

Always have a backup of a backup that you hide

[@dr5t3v3]

Can't trust humans!

[@RobertBlair]

In a thermometer, feel lucky it's not a rectal one.

[@Ceelvain]

This is more hacker culture content than there have been at defcon in the last 10 years.

[@chitra___]

Oof

[@mllenessmarie]

Oof indeed

[@utsabojha7591]

“We don’t need the UI” 😂

[@some1and297]

Even a 10x engineer doesn't want to fuck around w Vulkan bugs lol

[@oventi_]

We only need an api and the console

[@replikvltyoutube3727]

Reminds me when Primagen and Teej built coffee shop on ssh terminal

[@parkInSuns]

I mean migrating to Mac-Mini from AWS is truly 10x for a startup tbh...

[@random240dc]

Omg "no, hire less engineers" Ive worked with that VP of Dev. Fought their way to the top of the dev heap, absolutely unable to manage, delegate, or accept anyone elses ideas

[@doctorale84]

and then hired devs even shittier than him to feel safe? I know that kind of guy

[@futureruler1]

i'm working for that guy 😂

[@krellin]

the 10x engineer : facinated by what terminal does when you keep pressing enter

[@Dredge22]

He's communicating with the rootkit to access the backup. You can't trust humans to not delete it.

[@q1337]

creates custom terminal interface because the current one refused to do 1 minor function, then ends up not using it after all the development because he's use to the original one

[@NoFutureForG0uda]

the cuda driver on linux hit very hard

[@jonathankittel2985]

Someone's not 10x.

[@transcended_mind]

cuBLAS and cuDNN would hit harder 😢 Sorry, PTSD from the previous week...

[@jonathankittel2985]

​@@transcended_mind No worries. I also had huge driver issues.

[@jsdavo]

"this was a microwave?" had me in tears

[@hamjbs]

"3-4 hours, if you leave the room maybe 2" my favorite line

[@itsoctotv]

"Our network is down" "Perfect" * beep * * clicks on casio * "I was stress testing it" * beep * * beep*

[@xw33b36]

"SSL is a joke.. I know the guy who built the backdoor" LMFAO 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@apIthletIcc]

that "you're good at front end too?" was the most engineer thing i ever heard lol

[@Dezdichado1000]

Product manager - he was about to launch into a 4 hour monologue proving why he don't need no PM.

[@CupidGaming522]

He's not wrong though with that "compilers always be complaining".

[@lorderikir]

0:03 this one aged well with Crowdstrike

[@ShaanCoding]

Knows the person who writes the SSH backdoor, days later regreSSHion CVE drops. Bro is literally him wtf

[@IronCandyNotes]

Finding a Haskell job is like finishing Ocarina of Time as young Link.

[@helmofilho2037]

So, you just need a stick and bug yourself to the future?

[@janisir4529]

I'm pretty sure you are wrong, I recall someone doing the latter.

[@joaomendoncayt]

Few will catch the subtle but purposeful "what" "what" "what" repetition. It's always a constant "what".

[@dr5t3v3]

Only if they haven't worked with someone who constantly says, "What‽" (it's an interrobang, a sask.) (I do this all the time, FWIW.)

[@justsomeonepassingby3838]

​@@dr5t3v3 what Do you use a bépo keyboard or what ?

[@nicesoul]

a bit of context, please.

[@joaomendoncayt]

​@@nicesoul It's just a funny attention to detail I noticed - the fact the project manager in the video is constantly reacting to the "10x engineer" with a "what?!" both surprised and confused at the same time.

[@Puschit1]

I know a company that measures the quality of code in "WTFs per minute"

[@rrraewr]

compiler smalltalk killed me 🤣

[@AustinTheWise]

Installing Doom on the microwave but not knowing it was even a microwave in the first place, real 10x right there.

[@monad_tcp]

3:13 you're good at frontend too, yes but I don't do it, only if you double my salary, $200K for the backend and $200K for the frontend.

[@meekrab9027]

Don't forget $200k for the project management, $200k for the database and $200k for the infra engineering

[@rajan_dmr]

I need an entire day to decode all the jokes.

[@parkerlreed]

If you're not here, it might take only a few hours.

[@jdhdjsjsjajahyHfbwbiaj]

turns off/on coffee machine and accidentally installs linux in this simple process 😂 love it

[@Fircasice]

No, he turned it on and off.

[@stanchern3796]

No, he just literally answered the question he understood. Like "what is this?" meaning "what is it running on?"

[@Mizerka_]

I fully expected him to pull a lock picking set to get into his backup vault

[@bmoe-dude]

“Is that your diploma?!” “Oh yeah - I needed that for my visa.” 😂😂😂

[@OsydeousMusic]

man "the office" camera shooting style is the best

[@monad_tcp]

0:44 yes, there's a working cuda driver for linux, its called running the LSW, Linux Subsystem for Windows, non-ironically you run the Windows NT Core stripped down to 150MB just to load 600MB of NVidia blob using the Xen Hypervisor with the GPU pass-through, that only costs 1% of performance, but you gain 15% of performance because no linux driver for NVidia is as good as the Windows one.

[@Zeka00]

Cool. I'm still new to linux so half of that flew over my head but anyways...

[@sheeplord4976]

@@Zeka00 He is saying to run CUDA in a windows virtual machine, lol.

[@simplegamer6660]

Is this a joke? 'Cause i can't find anything on the topic

[@dr5t3v3]

@@simplegamer6660 Yes, it's a joke. Until _you_ have to rewrite it in Rust. Then it's still a joke, it's just not funny anymore.

[@younoob15315624]

​@@simplegamer6660well, you're missing 10x in your "engineer")

[@anyaskirko3201]

Compiler will always be complaining lmao

[@Seven-ez5ux]

Forgot the casual 200 WPM monkeytype while compiling a custom unix kernel.

[@fanyasy]

Did you move our entrire AWS stack to a Mac Mini again 😂

[@janemf]

“again”

[@monad_tcp]

don't touch the mac mini, its load bearing. (the refrigerator was missing a foot and the mac mini is literally load bearing the refrigerator)

[@pradeepmax1]

Last month, I migrated 90% of our office websites to my Proxmox homelab, and my boss had a meltdown! 😅 Is that the same thing he's referring to? I did it for cost-cutting and, honestly, it was the most satisfying thing I've done in ages.😊

[@christiansiegert9895]

⁠​⁠@@pradeepmax1You moved company infrastructure to your home server without asking?

[@LibertyMonk]

​@@christiansiegert9895it's the boss's fault for giving them the credentials to do so, honestly.

[@AnunayInuganti]

"We inject the software in the customer's windows distribution"

[@theterribleanimator1793]

The CIA approach is very performant.

[@q1337]

4:40 compiler small talk hahahahaha, 999 warnings 0 errors, warnings breaking stuff is skill issue

[@clancamper]

"what about product management" This strikes panic and fear into the heart of the developer

[@bananasmileclub5528]

“Is this your diploma on the ground…” “Yo I need this for my visa” I’m dead

[@rortan]

this video is genuinely a masterpiece

[@StefanErwinBaumer]

That is one prophetic start to the video.

[@NathanaelNewton]

I saw the short version of this and started binge watching old videos from your channel.. and now there's a new video! It's Christmas in July!! Before you say it's not July yet, it's July in New Zealand. Am I in New Zealand? No, but that doesn't matter.

[@metascopeinitiatives2550]

seems like a runtime error.

[@CaspersCuts]

TIL New Zealand finally moved their Christmas to a winter month.

[@BruceNJeffAreMyFlies]

Meri kirihimeti, nō Aotearoa, e hoa.

[@CaspersCuts]

@@BruceNJeffAreMyFlies Māori Christmas to you too.

[@mannyistyping]

This brings back so many feels of the people I was around in 2016. All the wildness and brilliance. Flatness and unawareness of so many things.

[@halneufmille]

Installed custom Linux by turning the coffee machine on and off.

[@scottserage9022]

“Don’t touch this, it’s part of our infra” 😂

[@ColeMGR]

The SSL joke 😂

[@guilherme5094]

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

[@dr5t3v3]

Yes, that's correct.

[@cobbcoding]

"I wrote our own crypto, just to be safe" wild

[@danielcajas7983]

That first joke lands differently now lol

[@kalebbruwer]

Right out of the gate with "we inject our code in the customer's windows distribution"... This man worked at Crowdstrike

[@mariotabali2603]

Got here faster than a 10x engineer can exit from an infinite loop

[@justsomeonepassingby3838]

"Faster than typing C-C"

[@andromadusnaruto1544]

Yo?! 😅

[@justinbastelli3692]

"compilers always be complaining" truer words have never been spoken

[@Nylspider]

"We're two Javascript frameworks away from actually launching this" "What?!" "I'm joking, I'm joking... It's all lost and hopeless" my favorite lines by far

[@shogunv123]

This is sooo good, when you have worked with someone like this it hits different

[@GPT-4_Beta]

I have a Developer living next door, too, and I absolutely HATE him! He is about 50 feet closer to the web servers of Stack Overflow and due to the lower network latency, he can ask a lot more questions there!

[@Definesleeper]

" they're using arc browser ... we don't need them" ouch

[@Cyromantik]

3 to 5 hours... If you leave, maybe 2. This speaks to me.

[@BBayjay]

"I wrote our own crypto, just to be safe" LOL

[@thatotherguy4245]

"I already destroyed the code and burned the computer" 😂

[@logananderon9693]

"Compilers always be complaining."

[@vagglord3156]

"We had a working Cuda driver for Linux the whole time!?"

[@TestHandlePleaseIgnore]

Jack of all trades, master of all.

[@BenjaminKayEightOfficial]

And often the many is better than one

[@dannyarcher6370]

Except understanding humans.

[@siddiksid3287]

It's all lost and hopeless 😂😂

[@KarlieMildraed]

Don't know how many times I've watched this since release. I saw the short version first. Beyond LOLZ. Can't wait for the movie length version. Great vid, PAAH.

[@tomk.9803]

What startup is this? I like the working culture

[@y_0_1_0]

2:48 Even a 10x Engineer struggles with JS.

[@Dredge22]

That's because JS is a -1x multiplier. -1x engineer * JS = 1x engineer 10x engineer * JS = -10x engineer

[@gabrielnilo6101]

"compilers always be complaining" the code be like: Found 17 Errors but everything works.

[@danieldieste9905]

Meh. More likely 17 advisories (in which case: small project)

[@BrandonBradford]

“Compiler small talk”

[@Meskarune]

"I have a backup you didn't know about" 😂

[@leonardogsperin]

Yeaaaahhhh TERRY DAVIS SHALL LIVE FOREVER IN OUR OS

[@gwills9337]

2:03 people can see our customer statistics *publicly*!? 😂

[@readysetexploit]

"People can see our customer statistics publicly?!" "Yea but it is super performant!" LMAO dead

[@PapaMike23]

I don't really understand that part with the AI generated face of the guy saying the line. Is that a reference to something?

[@shyamsantoki]

"compiling always be complaining" golden line lol

[@suhasnama2795]

Perfect. Prefect, down to the last minute detail

[@moniali2792]

"I destroyed all the code and burnt the computer" had me in tears 😂