Questions No Man Has Ever Asked His Friends

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[@illuminahde]

Gross. I can't believe he violated the friendship with that kinda personal question.

[@brockobama4408]

I dropped my HotPocket

[@belly_nelly]

Have had the same best friend for ~20 years and am proud to say we don’t know each other’s middle names, favorite colors, or birthdays. Guys keep friendships professional

[@eugenetswong]

What's even worse is that Danny probably really wanted to know. That girl probably never even asked him to do that.

[@drowningin]

If a bro ever asked me questions like that I would call him Gay for the rest of my life

[@elusivemayfly7534]

I love and enjoy being with both the men and women in my life. But there is no hang-out more fun and low stress than watching ridiculous movies and drinking Moscow mules with my husband and his brothers. It is gloriously unemotional even though we all know we love each other. Just jokes and chop-busting.

[@connorfitzpatrick622]

"I am in sales." Is the best line of the vid.

[@twelvecatsinatrenchcoat]

There are nine men in the group chat. I know one of them repairs medical equipment. I've known these guys for my entire life lol.

[@healthymindhappierlife5089]

The whole thing was funny, but that final punchline was perfection!

[@BaconIsGood4You]

Indeed.

[@rossrobertson674]

We should probably roll 😂

[@zeke1220]

@@John-zj9urMost of my friends do what I do because I got them jobs because they're my friends.

[@DJ-fn3jm]

He, is in fact, wearing a wire. That would have been a hilarious twist if Ryan had found it...clipped right to his collar.

[@takethepowerback83]

Only wire he’s wearing is the one in his bra 😮

[@arpee1337]

Noticing things isn't a canadians strong suit

[@galaxytraveler5779]

breaking the fourth wall?

[@Eddiefresh]

I spent a week out of town hanging out the whole time with my buddy that had recently got divorced. When I got back home, someone asked me what happened with their divorce. I said that literally never came up one time 🤣 😂😂

[@TheParadiseParadox]

Just being normal for a buddy in a tough time can help a lot. Thanks for your service

[@defeqel6537]

@@TheParadiseParadox Yup. Just have a private moment with them with some beers, and if they want to talk about it, they will, if not, talk about something else

[@cheeriohos]

You're a good friend. He likely just needed an escape and not think about the bullshit for a little while and you helped with that

[@MrEvldreamr]

@@TheParadiseParadoxor… it doesnt help.

[@TheParadiseParadox]

@@MrEvldreamr okay...

[@tteros5998]

Every girlfriend always asked how my friends were after I came back from hanging out with them for hours or days at a time. I'd shrug and say "I dunno, fine I think? Didn't really come up"

[@Lil_mar00]

So true

[@joeysplats3209]

Still, nobody can tell me why they go to the bathroom together.

[@nilserhard2895]

@joeysplats3209 Either Gossip or to ask for a spare Tampon (or a different Kind of Women's Needs Product). It think I asked my Sister once and that's what she told me. Either her or my first Girlfriend.

[@g3nj1]

Why is she asking questions like that? Is she in to them or something? Genuine curiosity or concern is not how they operate... She sounds loose. Probably would cheat if asking questions like that... Run!

[@pitbullbob9569]

@@g3nj1 damn you paranoid man

[@twelvecatsinatrenchcoat]

They didn't WRITE this bit. This just literally happened to one of them and they thought "we should make this a skit."

[@nojustno3331]

this is what makes their bits so authentic, easily pulled from real life

[@TheGreatSteve]

The ironic thing is that they are both wearing wires, you can see their mics.

[@skeetorkiftwon]

That's why Ryan only patted down his shoulders lol

[@connorgillispie7128]

Bro it’s iconic 😂

[@DH-xw6jp]

That would have been a perfect fourth wall break. "Oh, what's this? I thought you weren't wearing a wire?!" "I'm not, well I am, but it's for the skit not your girlfriend!"

[@immaleaf4964]

The way Ryan Ryan Long picked up on that was crazy

[@maverickstclare3756]

and like true fellas the drama was over in an instant

[@carlrood4457]

One the major things women refuse to acknowledge is how little men care about our own personal lives, let alone each other's.

[@cvn6555]

They obsess over so many things they think we are being evasive when we truly couldn't care less.

[@elusivemayfly7534]

Lol

[@Rampart.X]

You're just perpetuating false stereotyping of dumb males

[@zombygunslinger]

Whenever I see my friends my wife asks how their wives/girlfriends are doing, how is their family etc., and I have no answers.

[@elusivemayfly7534]

@@cvn6555 I’m a woman, and I confess I do this sometimes. Well, I pretty well always obsess over many things and sometimes think my husband just doesn’t want to talk about his feelings or praise he got at work, that kind of thing. But over about 15 years with him, I do that less and less and just enjoy talking about regular stuff and cracking jokes with him. Plus then it’s more special when he does open up. :-)

[@elliotkaufman8341]

I really like how they patched it up at the end and that Ryan ALSO doesn't know what his friend does

[@christopherbataluk8148]

This video is so real. My wife is always baffled at how men don't really interrogate each other on our personal lives but assume if the other person wanted us to know they would tell us.

[@JoeyP946]

why would the other person wanna know about your personal relationship with your girlfriend. That's fking weird dude xd

[@BlueBunny53]

Maybe I’m turning over a new leaf Nope, you’re not doing that, sooo… 😂😂😂

[@seanmurphy8312]

"Lucky you're not in sales." "I am in sales." "Well I'm not buying it judas."

[@_Dropkick]

asking him if he's wearing a wire while a lapel mic is sticking out of his shirt might be my favorite part of this sketch

[@drunkenhobo5039]

I can't tell if the rooftop location was a deliberate nod to the unnatural rooftop relationship discussion scenes in "The Room", but if it was then it was definitely appreciated.

[@revolutionfrommahbed4246]

lol - I also caught that! I kinda wished they’d worked in “You’re tearing me apart!!!!” 🤣🤣🤣

[@MaesterMike]

At least they actually filmed it on a rooftop instead of a green screen.

[@arpee1337]

Hey Mark!

[@frankjustus3117]

That's just where New Yorkers hang out in the summer

[@connorgillispie7128]

@@arpee1337eh you tried I guess

[@bobbymo5642]

Love how it ends with a double tap to the bottom line... “Lucky you're not in sales..." “I am in sales!" “Okay, Chris is already on his way, now. So, we should probably roll..."

[@Bummerdrummer463]

😂 you wearing a wire or something?!

[@okienative4785]

Truth.

[@John_Doe742]

Maybe for his bra

[@Lawdensky]

We can clearly see they're both wearing wires That's the best part

[@dannyarcher6370]

Don't ask, don't tell.

[@frakismaximus3052]

😂😂😂

[@zebra00024]

That's sad. Talk if you need to, listen if someone is talking.

[@samlynx2016]

​@@zebra00024For real!

[@hoviksmail]

One of the worst things a guy can hear is, "Let's talk about our feelings."

[@MrEvldreamr]

Ok…?

[@justagoose7741]

Hope you're not one to cry about feminism saying shit like "no one cares about us/men issues" lol

[@HowardLogan-gv5kc]

That means your buddy is trying to go steady with you

[@trublgrl]

"ARE YOU WEARING A WIRE?!?" _Lav mic clearly visible on collar._

[@VanchaMarch2]

My brother is one of my best friends and he lives a few minutes away. We talk on the daily. No clue what he does. Something medical related? I think he’s a nurse or maybe like a janitor for a hospital or some shit

[@RustCole01]

Nurse.... janitor... who cares? He works at a hospital. Either way, ask him to grab you some opiates. Or epinephrine if you prefer uppers

[@Rambletripe1]

I remember getting back home once and being asked how my friend was about his engagement. I just looked completely blank.

[@FunnyDougy]

"The biggest piece of shit I know." 🤣

[@kevhead1525]

No offense. 😄😄😄

[@joshrichards1131]

This is a pretty accurate portrayal of most of my friendships.

[@klikklik7499]

"I AM in sales!"

[@ctjlg1]

That's accurate. My mom asks me about how my best friend is doing, and my usual answer is he is fine last time I checked. She doesn't get why I don't know more 😅

[@ogregolabo]

Good one! Simple and efficient, academic sociologists could not portrait better actual male friendship.💫

[@Name-gi8dr]

"Luckily you are not in sales" Excellent writing

[@BboyCorrosive]

and just like that, it was over, they never spoke of it or actually even thought of it again, because, dudes rock 🤘

[@SeraphsWitness]

Yep. Holding a grudge gets in the way of accomplishing stuff.

[@HenryThree]

lol so true, I don't know shit about my friends' personal lives despite us hanging out all the time

[@cvn6555]

That's guys. I have gone to cookouts and hung out with some dudes for three hours, played a full cornhole tournament and gone home never learning any of their names or what they did for a living. Meanwhile, my wife made four new friends, learned all about them, their kids, how they met their husbands and made plans to get together in the near future.

[@janjansen6443]

@@cvn6555 If I did not live it myself I'd call you faker news than CNN.

[@SeraphsWitness]

Why ruin a good friendship with personal stuff.

[@michellek2130]

Had to be inspired by the Jonathan Haidt convo. It’s so true, I ask my bf questions about his friends that are obvious to me- like, “when’s the baby due” and he’ll reply “oh I didn’t ask about that”😂😂. Perplexing!.. Great sketch!

[@freddiesimmons1394]

It literally doesnt matter to us. That information is useless

[@michellek2130]

@@freddiesimmons1394so interesting!

[@anneb889]

So even when women aren’t present, we’re still the root of most men’s arguments and fights. 🤣

[@abcdefghij337]

Meanwhile, the women: What do you mean you don’t know how her sister’s dog’s surgery went? Do you even care about them? … Did you forget your wire again?

[@musmic17]

Sent this to the boys (we’re all in sales)

[@mas_bonitaxoxo]

I can't tell her that I don't give a shit lol

[@Cyphlix]

"you wearing a wire or something!?" > both with visible lapel mics

[@c99kfm]

I did this, once. A girl friend (not a girlfriend) in high school asked me to question her...I dunno, boyfriend? Boyfriend presumptive? Because I was friends with him, too. I have no clue what she wanted to know by now, it was something personal I think. So I eventually agreed, just to get her off my back, but like three hours later she was mad 'cause I hadn't already done so. That highlights another difference - I was waiting for him to mention something related to the question, so the question wouldn't feel unnatural. Women seem to be perfectly okay with asking obviously prying and/or leading questions without any excuse for doing so. (Not actually relevant, but I did ask the very prying question, which he probably recognized as coming from her, and he gave the answer she wanted to hear, so that's what she got from me.)

[@CBSlater]

That last “I AM in sales!” made me actually laugh out loud.

[@TimBitts649]

This is the problem today. People have small families. Guys grow up without other brothers. And without sisters. Leaves you unarmed for dating, never having dealt with, what women are like. So comedians have to fill in the gaps in your life education.

[@_taxman_]

He IS wearing a wire. Looks like they both are. BUSTED!

[@FatNorthernBigot]

This is like "The Departed", but without being overrated.

[@ClarenceJBoddicker1987]

The Hong Kong or American version?

[@FatNorthernBigot]

@@ClarenceJBoddicker1987 American, because I'm completely devoid of any culture.

[@cvn6555]

So many of the big movies, chock full of stars, fail to live up to the hype. It is better when you don't know the actors and they, to you, can just be that character. If you're thinking "Wow, DiCaprio is nailing this role" then it kills the experience.

[@neetscholar4149]

@@cvn6555 True, but every once in a while you witness a Grossman from Tropic Thunder moment. Those moments are pretty amazing.

[@SeraphsWitness]

Yea. It was good, but people creamed their pants over it because Scorcese hadn't won an Oscar yet so we all had to pretend it was the best thing on planet earth.

[@AlphanumericCharacters]

I actually tried caring. Ex-girlfriend had me so mind fucked that she convinced me I was a bad guy because I didn’t know how many kids my friend had, their names and ages. “Why are you asking about my kids bro?” Turned out he had to figure out their ages himself. Either I wasn’t a dirt bag or we all are dirtbags. Either way, I’m cool with it.

[@ShadowReaper-pu2hx]

Women. ☕️

[@SeraphsWitness]

You're not a dirtbag. Women insist that their model of friendship ought to be everyone's model of friendship. Don't let them do that to you.

[@belisaurusgaming6192]

Tis skit just made me think I'm not masculine enough. I'd totally ask my best friends about this stuff from time to time. I probably need a cat and a box of wine now.

[@Yryyyys]

Nah you're good. You're masculine enough. This is ridiculous. Caring about other people doesn't make you less of a man.

[@freddiesimmons1394]

​@@Yryyyysbut it does make him a bit weird at least

[@Yryyyys]

@@freddiesimmons1394 caring about other people makes you weird? OK

[@freddiesimmons1394]

@@Yryyyys it's weird to think that asking = caring, or that not asking = not caring

[@Yryyyys]

@@freddiesimmons1394 that's not what I think... you can care in many different ways... but this video and many in the comments are totally glorifying not asking AND not caring. And totally acting as if asking in a caring manner is weird or "gay" or something

[@MistyHoffman737]

*Larry Burkett's book on "Giving and Tithing" drew me closer to God and helped my spirituality. 2020 was a year I literally lived it. I cashed in my life savings and gave it all away. My total giving amounted to 40,000 dollars. Everyone thought I was delusional. Today, 1 receive 85,000 dollars every two months. I have a property in Calabasas, CA, and travel a lot. God has promoted me more than once and opened doors for me to live beyond my dreams. God kept to his promises to and for me*

[@Ryancooke763]

There's wonder working power in following Kingdom principles on giving and tithing. Hallelujah!

[@AmyCallahan80]

But then, how do you get all that in that period of time? What is it you do please, mind sharing?

[@MistyHoffman737]

It is the digital market. That's been the secret to this wealth transfer. A lot of folks in the US and abroad are getting so much from it, God has been good to my household Thank you Jesus

[@MistyHoffman737]

And thanks to my co-worker (Michael) who suggested Ms Susan Jane Christy

[@GaleVoyer]

How can I start this digital market, any guidelines and how can I reach out to her?

[@name-vi6fs]

I dont know any of my buddies' middle names, except for the one dude who goes by his middle name.

[@jamesclarke5397]

One of my friends has worked for me for almost ten years... I just realized I'm very unsure what his middle name is

[@SeraphsWitness]

Absolutely accurate. Why women insist on forcing their method of interaction on men as the standard is beyond me.

[@deadbungeejumper]

That ending was so legit. Big fight. Got some stuff off their chests. Ok now back to life as usual. Typical dudes.

[@Ownyx]

You had me on a rollercoaster of emotions there

[@Augmintt]

He's a simp spy!

[@Youdontknowwhatliterallymeans]

My job sometimes involves asking people personal questions. It's remarkable how many people only have a vague idea of what their spouses do. I'm not joking.

[@Tsunkuotaku]

to be fair, no one wants to come home from 8+ hours of work everyday and talk about work more

[@TheLeadhound]

One time, at a wedding, I specifically took time out to get an general update on people's lives because I know my mom would be mad if I did not ask them anything.

[@Crystal11Skulls]

Did you have to explain to people why you were asking to begin with?

[@TheLeadhound]

@@Crystal11Skulls Yes. I specifically told them why I was asking for highlight updates from their lives.

[@GraphicJ]

That time when your friend don't know that you know, they know you know. ..you know?

[@nunziocombattelli6311]

The bots with their generic “great cinematography and lighting, your videos are inspiring” comments always crack me up

[@Jackspiring]

This comment is currently surrounded by 3 of those comments and i dont get it 😂 what’s their game even?

[@CyrusCageSCWS]

I'm so impressed and happy that half your audience knew about the snip and suck. They're the first people I've ever met that know about it. And I bring it up all the time 😂

[@Higgs829]

Just hanging on the rooftop like a couple of boys drinking beers

[@ClarenceJBoddicker1987]

I miss rooftop beers.

[@Higgs829]

@@ClarenceJBoddicker1987 me too

[@MillillioN]

I can actually believe that they've worked in sales. Especially, Ryan, he'd come up with any old crap to sell you the latest carpet cleaner, home insulation, solar panels, phone contracts, volcano insurance or whatever else 😂

[@yodawgzgaming4416]

This is how the first series of Terminators fails

[@DavidLarson100]

Psychology 101: Men do jobs surrounding "things" (building, breaking, engineering, etc) and women do jobs about people (teaching, nursing, counseling, HR). Look around a playground. The guys are doing an activity together (building a tower, playing a sport etc) often competitively and aggressively despite their friendship, while the girls are usually gathered in a circle talking or doing something cooperative like jumping and clapping pattern stuff. Our adult friendships are the same. We don't pry into personal details as men. We do an activity together. That's my fishing buddy, my chess buddy, my drinking and watching sports buddy, etc. While women want to learn what's new with the other person in often very private ways. Neither is right or wrong, we just evolved for very different purposes. TLDR: funny skit

[@TheseAreMyBkmrks]

This sketch is art

[@flybrand]

Guys would ask this question: 1/ 1:14 if they were interested in her, and 2/ 1:25 if another girl put him up to the task.

[@mithrandirthegrey7644]

So true. The polite thing is to ask "how's the family"? The polite thing is to answer "fine" and then never mention it again. I go see my friends so that I don't have to talk about any of that bs.

[@knightrider585]

"You wearing a wire?" Has obvious lapel mic sticking out of his collar. hahaha

[@sansivian]

100% Accurate response. 🎯

[@ElizabethDohertyThomas]

Had a double date once. She and I spent 1.5 hours analyzing her new budding, maybe marriage bound relationship. At the end, I asked my boyfriend if the guy was really into her. "I dunno, we didn't talk about it." 🤣 I have never felt so cliched.

[@CharlesNauck]

If I went on a double date with a couple and the BF asked me a bunch of questions about whether I was into my date... I would think he was hitting on me or had been given an assignment. In either case, we likely wouldn't hang out anymore. At least by my choice.

[@LetsGoECU1]

I've also never looked a girl dead in the eye and gone "what are we"

[@StuTheDon17]

I ask that question to my mates all the time. But just to make them feel awkward for my own amusement. I actually don't care if they meet the one.

[@ReasonablySkeptic]

Men don't ask questions because WE DON'T CARE! The stronger the friendship the less you need to know about each other.

[@elusivemayfly7534]

Lol, this seems to be true in my observation of men folk

[@notme222]

Man you think you can trust a guy. (To not act like some kind of trusted confidant.)

[@AlphaQuebec5446]

My gf asked me how my friend was after I went away with him for 3 days. I had no idea. I did find out how much pasta you can boil in a kettle...

[@kickinthegob]

My wife found out that one of our male friends has been dating a girl for 2 months. She asked me if I knew and I said, "Sure - I've known for 6 weeks". She was shocked I didn't tell her. I'm shocked she thought I cared that much about it.

[@leftrom9738]

Lol, this is SO true! Gfs always trying to snoop around in the sneakiest ways.

[@elusivemayfly7534]

This reminds me of that meme: Wife: I wonder if he’s thinking about me right now Husband: reads frog saying “it is Wednesday, my dudes” Husband: “Haha, it is”

[@samuelking4723]

“No, I’m not wearing a wire.” _literally wearing a visible microphone wire on his shirt_

[@jb7720]

You can hear the brotherhood between these fellas 😂

[@questionmark3583]

That escalated quickly!! 😆😂

[@samlynx2016]

'Last week, you brought a bunch of work friends over to MY house and then left.' 😂 Well, this makes me feel better about the guy that has invited friends over to my house before. I was very confused.

[@StackingGains]

This one was hilarious, great job you guys

[@LordYggdrasill]

I thought that was a Charmander @0:20

[@spk1121]

I hope Ryan Ryan Long recovers from this incident very soon 🙏

[@AlphanumericCharacters]

I remember watching Cops back in the day. They would always separate the two criminals and ask if they knew the other guy’s last name. The cops had an “aha” moment when they never knew. I’ve known dudes twenty years and if I ever heard their last name I forgot it. Middle name? Hell no!

[@BJ-uncensored]

"Are you wearing a wire!?" *feels the accused's breast* Bro... You just created a new move and you didn't even know it. I'm going to try this at work with some hotties!

[@BJ-uncensored]

Hey guys, me again. I had a meeting with HR today. This may not be the move to do at work.

[@RasheedahNizam]

Your HR must get paid by the minute. Your whole story happened in 180 seconds 👍

[@BJ-uncensored]

@@RasheedahNizam that's what she said.

[@ferociousgustafson4040]

Epicureans lived in communes away from women in the pursuit of happiness. These communes later became monasteries. Food for thought.

[@aa2513]

These boys don't miss.

[@SaintGerbilUK]

Ryan Ryan Long Long is my favorite comedian, with some really funny middle names.

[@deadlypandaghost]

I was fully expecting him to find a wire then one of them escapes using the wire as a zipline.

[@DavidRealMusic]

I thought he was a doppleganger... I've been watching too many fantasy shows

[@joeelvinofficial]

Great camerawork, music and script. Could easily be out of a movie haha!

[@adampindell]

My best friend's mom died; I didn't even ask if he was ok... We went and bought Skyrim and played that shit for a few days. Some shit you just don't bring up. If/when they have something to say, they will say it.

[@SeraphsWitness]

That was the best therapy you could have given him.

[@Metal-Magazine-es]

you guys are just on another level. insanely goood

[@kingofthorns203]

He’ll be asking “what are your interests and hobbies?” next!

[@galaxytraveler5779]

I can't help laughing even when Ryan is trying to be serious 😂

[@gren509]

yeah, that is the question ... we need to answer for our own good .

[@dano9411]

"Garth! Marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries!"

[@fraterseamus]

"are you wearing a wire?". . .meanwhile they are both obviously wearing a wire. Lol

[@DavidPeaceOneLove]

Relentless 😂😅😂😅

[@chrisdavey5530]

something like this happened with me and my friend......I dont remember what i was about but im like "why are so concerned?" and he gave all the same schlock and I was like "bullshit, I just had a conversation with you 20 minutes ago, where halfway through you got bored, started beatboxing and completely forgot what were talking about" (he does this all the time by the way, you'll be talking to him and he just turns into Biz Markie)

[@RyanLongcomedy]

😂

[@veggiemanx]

Some of my friends ive known for years- we habgout all the time and I still dont know what most of them do for a living

[@skeet0rz]

"You think my name is Ryan Ryan?" 😂

[@johnteixeira1791]

Lol this is the realest comedy sketch I've ever seen

[@camilojdl]

Best action short ever.