r/AITA My Husband Got My Sister Pregnant!

[@JB-ew6pi]

Story 1: “you need to forgive your sister because whatever she did to you, she’s suffering from worse.” BRUH!!!! SHES SUFFERING THE SAME THING!!! ONLY DIFFERENCE IS THAT SHE WASN’T BETRAYED BY HER SISTER! Parents need to sit down and stfu!

[@Aleksa1185]

Exactly my thoughts!

[@JHyde-tv3if]

Thank you!!

[@buzzsawwyrm1595]

And I don’t think she came home to find her husband cheating on her immediately after the miscarriage

[@philip8498]

I think even after experiencing the exact same situation, the sister doesnt understand how fundamentally she broke OPs trust. If she was any less self aware, she would seize to be sentient

[@bibigamer502]

Except the Sister is the golden child

[@enderkai618]

if they cheat with you, they will cheat on you.

[@Nerobyrne]

I wish someone would cheat with me because I don't care if they cheat on me, and I'm lonely ^.^

[@gengar618]

@@Nerobyrnebro what is wrong with you lol, that is not the way

[@abi_cat28]

@@Nerobyrne you good, my guy?

[@Nerobyrne]

@@gengar618 it may not be your way, but it is a way ^.^

[@gengar618]

@@Nerobyrne I hope you stay alone forever

[@justicedunham4088]

I, as a broke guy right out of college, spent more than $100 on Christmas gifts this year. That guy deserves 6 out of 5 buttholes.

[@Nikita_Akashya]

I am disabled and also broke. I spend over 100€ per month on food. The grocery prices are perverted here in Germany. And I only have around 300€ a month and need to pay for a lot of things myself. Medication, Hygiene products and so many small things I need. I wish I had a bigger budget, because I can barely afford food.

[@Nerobyrne]

@@Nikita_Akashya Bro you don't get disability assistance?

[@Nikita_Akashya]

​@@NerobyrneI get pocket money from the Jugendamt. I still live in Jugendhilfe. I don't have to pay for my living arrangements, but I do have to use my pocket money on food, hygiene, medicine and whatever else I need and want. I am getting by just fine, but I wish I had a little bit more budget for food. I cook all my own meals, but my fridge is always empty. I do get more money, now that I started my Reha. Berufliche Reha. But I don't have the money yet and I just started. Life is hard, but it can only get better from here.

[@jordanbauerly8843]

Give that husband an envelope with divorce paperwork, the receipt for filing it with whatever tip was left over, and a note saying "I made it work."

[@TawnyRoyal]

Story 1 is pure evidence of the statement “if they’ll cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you”. Nobody deserves what they had to deal with, but shame on OP’s parents for defending the sister’s actions as if OP didn’t go through the exact same thing with the exact same boy, not man.

[@chocodraws5137]

She should've told them bluntly that she stopped being her sister the day she got knocked up by my ex

[@bibigamer502]

They probably if not likely dislike OP and thought what happened was mild

[@jinxytwist2807]

What makes it so much worse is in the 3rd story op said she can't judge him cause it's his money. When you are married and a stay at home mom it's not just his money it's also hers so she most definitely can judge him. This is just pure financial abuse, plain and simple.

[@colbylawson5331]

It depends. Not saying what ops husband did is cool, as it's definitely an ahole move, but if it's his money it's his money.

[@jinxytwist2807]

@@colbylawson5331 That's not how it works with stay at home parents it's joint money then so it both of theirs

[@colbylawson5331]

@@jinxytwist2807 If it's joint money, then that's a Grey area, but any money that ops husband makes is strictly his money. Are op and her husband sharing a joint account?

[@colbylawson5331]

@@jinxytwist2807 While I agree it's financial abuse, any money ops husband makes is his to keep. However, her husband's behavior is still unacceptable and she needs to drop him and find someone else.

[@fussbudgetstories]

The friend got a paid trip from OP's husband to cover up an affair. This woman who also went on the trip is probably not the friend's girlfriend, but a mistress for OP's husband. This whole trip was just a ruse. OP's husband is having an affair. Why else would he be paying for everyone?

[@Roses-are-Beautiful25]

For the last story I don’t think the relationship has to be doomed. I think that what could happen if it’s so hard for him to wake up is that she always makes the breakfast and he always makes dinner. This would be an easy compromise as well as helps the split of responsibility.

[@tsian7328]

Exactly my thoughts on that one too, that seems fair for both of them and should solve the issue

[@panchoperez3964]

Yeah, OP just needs to understand that a compromise is both ways. Getting up 2-3 times a day early is manageable. Or have OP do dinner always and the GF breakfasts. That's also a compromise, doesn't matter if "it's easier for her bc she just has to throw extra eggs"

[@RevokFarthis]

That *could* work, but if OP were the sort of person to do that, we wouldn't be here discussing what a shite person he is.

[@fdm2155]

If the two of them are this focused on calculating what they do for each other... and are struggling to find common sense balances, ya gotta wonder how they would weather ANY challenges.

[@arnoldfossman1701]

If not dinner then some other household chore, maybe a couple of chores even, if they are not daily like breakfast is that is.

[@chaucernerd1690]

You know if that person had not purchased an extra plane seat, they’d have been criticized for taking too much space. Sometimes you just can’t win, where others are concerned. I’m glad they stood firm.

[@Samqdf]

Absolutely, she did the right thing and in return she was put in a no win situation.

[@RWAsur]

I'm glad they *sat* firm. ;)

[@jennimoses877]

Yes no matter what she would of been in a no win no matter what she did IMO

[@lilletrille1892]

Exactly the point I wanted to make!

[@demondogmom7221]

I flew on SWA roundtrip Florida to Arizona many years ago with a very expensive guitar. I bought two seats. The trip out was lovely. The trip back was not...I think it went Phoenix to Denver to Dallas to Tampa. Minor issues in Phoenix...a crap show in Denver. The steward(ess) insisted I needed to check it. I explained I paid for the extra seat (and early boarding). She told me it was a full flight, and again I explained I had two tickets...but added in if she'd like to assume personal liability for a $7500 guitar not in a metal case, I'd write something up and get it witnessed. I did however have printed the SWA policy on musical instruments. Not much she could do except be pissy. She informed me the guitar had to be in the window seat and seat belted in. No problem. I'd done it every leg. I put it in the window, seat, belted it in, pulled a hat and scarf from my bag and put it on the "head" and "neck" of the case. It was not a full flight and she did nothing but glare at me while I just smiled. I really hate flying commercially. If I absolutely HAVE to fly, I'll save for first class. Otherwise, I'll drive. I'm retired so time is not constrained anymore.

[@esued86]

Last story: Thank you Rslash for bringing it back to the fact he wants kids. As a father of a toddler, this guy's aversion to waking up early makes me laugh.

[@desireeloveros1055]

The guy's inability to to basic chores makes me livid. A middle schooler has more responsibilities than him!

[@cniknik9863]

Exactly! That Op made me upset. I wish he read out the responses calling him out

[@Lionheart-tu4zs]

Last one... He could easily have avoided an argument by offering to make ALL the dinners if she's making all the breakfasts. Or he could try to train his body for mornings, though that's the tougher route so I doubt he'd go for it.

[@arsteel2388]

Trying to go off coffee would probably do a lot, once his body got over the initial shock. All dinners for all breakfasts definitely would have been an easy solution. To be honest, I do most of the work in my relationship (breadwinning, cooking, cleaning, raising a kid), so the idea of *not* making breakfast for the partner was surprising to me.

[@DrunkSamurai]

Going off caffeine does nothing if you're not also working out.

[@firewizardrunepro]

@@arsteel2388 yeah i don't think that it was a big of a deal as it was made out to be, what annoyed me the most was rslash saying the dude was a bad person for this and his relationship was doomed to fail cause he wasn't a good person

[@MugenNiFukuzatsuna]

That's a horrible idea. Dinner over all is a harder meal to make than breakfast. However, it would make sense to come up with some other thing he can do. Agree to wash clothes or do dishes or something. Though, to be frank, the fact that they are in this relationship and she hasn't been making breakfast for him when she makes breakfast for herself every morning ... is strange. That's not something a person does when they like the person they are with. OP is pretty selfish for thinking he shouldn't have to do anything extra for her, but he is right that making breakfast for two is little to no additional effort than making breakfast for one. The fact that she hasn't been doing it and started a negotiation immediately upon him suggesting it, hints that she isn't actually that invested in him. He definitely should NOT be thinking of proposing to her. That relationship is a bad idea for both parties.

[@Janjones7735]

@@firewizardrunepro he is though

[@kaitycole]

First story is just crazy. Cheaters don’t change. If they cheated with you, they will more than likely cheat on you too.

[@lorilancaster5917]

I’m surprised OP did tell sister “you’ll get over it” which is what her ex and sister expected OP to do in their words

[@kaitycole]

@@lorilancaster5917 right??? I feel like that would be an appropriate response in that situation. Idk how she kept her cool for the most part. I’d be so livid

[@chrisvillarreal6855]

I agree, a relationship started with cheating will never have the same trust in it as starting new and once a cheater always a cheater

[@epichoagie5999]

Been there. One of my exes cheated on her ex with me. We got together, she moved to my home state, we were happy. 2 years later, she goes back to her home state for a job. After 4 months, she calls and tells me she has spent that entire time banging 5 different guys. Didn't give me a chance to speak on it, then blocked me. I had given her everything I had to make that relationship work. And that's what I got in return. Never ever date someone who is willing to cheat with you.

[@BersealiaDreamheart]

I agree. The miscarriage is sad and no one deserves to go through that because it’s painful. However, RSlash is right. Her sister’s miscarriage has nothing to do with why OP doesn’t want to have any contact with her. It’s the fact that her sister betrayed her. RSlash said it. If they cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you. The sister should’ve known better, and now she’s paying for the consequences of her own actions for marrying a serial cheater.

[@Traveler19491]

The guy who took his friend and his friend's girlfriend to Qatar...get real. The girlfriend is the husband's side piece. No man is going to fork over thousands to take some other guy's girl on a trip. His friend couldn't afford himself and girlfriend, so hubby says "Yo, I'll pick up plane tickets and hotel for you, but you gotta pay for your women." That's the only way it makes sense.

[@esmee6308]

Exactly what I was thinking, even if you're rich you make it a guy's trip. If she's that into football herself or won't let her boyfriend go, they need to figure out the solution together. Also no way you think $100 is enough for Christmas presents, decoration and food for a household with 3 kids. I spend barely anything on Christmas and spend more than that...

[@YesIlikebananasSo]

exactly what i thought

[@crispycrimson6448]

OHHHHH it's the friends girlfriend... I genuinely thought it was just a middle eastern couple and the dude had a girlfriend as well as a wife...

[@QuietRage]

I was thinking that they have a polyamorous relationship, at least that would be less predictable than the lady and husband having an affair behind both their SO's backs

[@dubheasadalosair8928]

At first I thought they were a polyamorous v, which would make sense. But the fact of it being the "friend's" girlfriend but really his side piece is equally as probable. Still that's just not right. I spend more than $100 on JUST my 1 daughter & that doesn't include gifts for the rest of the family. & for my daughter, I get her clothes as well as things she would enjoy playing.

[@ruaine83]

With the story about breakfast and dinner, op mentioned that they trade off making dinner. The fair thing to do in this situation, would be to ask girlfriend to make breakfast and OP to make dinner and that just be the daily routine. Therefore, you wouldn't have to have the trade off in the evening, the girlfriend wouldn't be put out as far as making breakfast everyday and then still having to make dinner that evening alternating with OP. Everybody cooks one meal every day

[@anthonyruiz8519]

Ah yes add really nothing AT ALL to the GFs task and add 50% of the cooking responsibility to the BF. Feminists would be proud

[@alidan]

​@@anthonyruiz8519 misread the post but leaving it here regardless. I will put it this way, when I cook for myself, it takes me the same amount of effort to make 1 meal as it does 20 (I meal prep, it takes next to 0 effort ro make more than one meal, its making 1 that takes effort) if she scratch makes pancakes 1 at a time, that's minimal extra effort, if its a pancake press, then near 0 extra effort, any of the meats, potatoes is actually 0 extra effort because the same goes into 1 as goes into 2 (feeding a family of 4 talking here, 1 steak or 4 is the same effort)

[@zacharyjackson1829]

@@alidan logically speaking it takes twice as long to crack 2-4 eggs instead of 1-2, toast twice as much bread (unless both only eat 1 toast), brown double the amount of sausage, and twice as long to give a shit about a man child instead of yourself. dude needs to grow up. there's no such thing as "morning people" just adults who wake their asses up, drink their coffee if needed, and move on with their day. if you can't do that you aren't an adult

[@jordanmchighlander9365]

@@zacharyjackson1829 there IS such a thing as morning people. Whether people lean towards morning or night has a lot to do with genetics.

[@zacharyjackson1829]

@jordanmchighlander9365 and my genetics prevent me from having an amazing metabolism. Doesn't mean I'm gonna be a little bitch and whine that I can't eat snack food all day. Genetics doesn't prevent you from waking up at 5am every morning and getting on with your day. If he quit bitching and woke up on a schedule he would be fine. Just to humor you I even took 10 minutes to actually find studies that support your claim. Just about every single one pointed out that being a morning person versus a night owl was more indicative of their life habits than anything

[@Nyax50Lopez]

1st story: highly deserved ngl. The sister, ex husband and parents didn't cared about OP's traumatic experience of miscarriage which can also add depression too. Wtf is wrong with everyone?! op gets a miscarriage, no one cared BUT when sister gets a stillborn, everyone begins to care. That's a severe wtf family.

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

In way op not showing support adds to pure form this karma mirroring ops past situation.

[@lunadreamcatcher3262]

As someone who isn't a morning person, I completely understand asking your partner who is a morning person to make breakfast. One of my parents would make breakfast while the other would make dinner. There can be a schedule put in place where the girlfriend makes breakfast for the both of them every other day and op can make dinner those days.

[@JHyde-tv3if]

That was what SHE proposed but he wouldn't go for it. That was the problem. She said then he should do all the dinners then and she would do all the breakfast and he said no.

[@krismal1300]

No, she asked if he would in return sometimes make breakfast for her like they are doing with dinner, not she breakfast he dinner

[@laughableInflection]

This is what i was thinking. Like... if shes going to be the breakfast person, why doesnt the night owl make dinner? It just makes sense. But he's set on doing nothing more on his end, while she does extra

[@LLandS18]

Yeah no. If he wants breakfast he should get up and make it. Or he should trade something off. Especially if you go read the comments on the story. He doesn't cook most suppers. He cooks one or two a month. She does all the housework all the errands for the house. The sheer entitlement of some people to think that their partners should carry all the weight in the relationship because once in a while they help out is pretty gross. Honestly, I think Mommy spoiled too many people and now they expect that treatment as adults.

[@mauricethomas2506]

I was definitely thinking why doesn’t he just pick up more of the dinners to make up for the mornings but if he isn’t willing to do that what does he expect

[@MrsShocoTaco]

I think the last couple's problem is more the expectation that marriage will be exactly 50/50 every moment. The fact of the matter is that relationships are rarely 50/50. It's more of a sliding scale. When one is down, the other takes up the slack. To attempt to balance it perfectly at all times will only lead to disappointment and resentment. The reall 50/50 is being there when the other person needs you which flips the math a bit and makes the total 100/100.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

True. My significant other does way more for me than I do. Sometimes I worry about that. But he knows I am willing (even if not always able) so hopefully he'll continue to love me forever and continue putting up with me. Lol

[@MrsShocoTaco]

@@SoManyRandomRamblings The effort counts for a lot

[@Original_Tenshi_Chan]

The problem comes in OP'S replies on his post. He claimed originally that they split dinner "50-50", but when pressed he changes it a little to "whoever comes home first starts dinner..."... then changes it again to "he starts work later than her so he always or most often comes home after her, so he RARELY makes dinner.." then he adds in that "admittedly, she does all the bill and food planning and does all the shopping too". Eventually he trickle truth admits that only chore he really does is "make the bed and sometimes yard work". The gf isn't being petty and expecting everything to be an even 50-50, she's probably just tired of it being 95-5 and then he adds another demand to her work load.

[@tully6648]

@@Original_Tenshi_Chan How did I know that it was going to be "whoever gets home first starts dinner." But it turns out I'm really the fool, because I genuinely thought it'd be limited to just that. I should've known that a guy who couldn't appreciate the ease of mind that someone else making breakfast for him could give him couldn't be assed to actually have a 50-50 split.

[@NicholeParker]

@@Original_Tenshi_Chan shit. My boyfriend and I were listening to this thinking “it literally just makes sense for her to make a little extra breakfast” because I can sleep til the afternoon on weekends and he always gets up early. He’s also the breakfast person, I scarf down instant oatmeal and run out the door. But knowing she’s doing everything else? Yeah no. That changes things.

[@mom5catskyle596]

I am a woman who cooks breakfast every morning for myself. If I had a partner who wanted some also, it is no big deal to throw another couple slices of bacon in the pan. I suppose OP could have offered to make dinner every night if she would make breakfast every morning, but still as long as she is cooking for herself, it should not be such a big deal for her to add an extra helping. Maybe OP could offer to do all the washing up after breakfast if she cooks it?

[@shykorustotora]

OP did say he often cooks dinner. Also, it sounds like OP has the same thing I do. Don't know what it's called but it takes me about 2 hours to get out of bed. If I rush, I'll feel sick, light headed and I've already fainted and hurt myself a few times. I actually have 0 appetite in the morning, so I typically don't eat, but if I do, it REALLY helps. I do think OP should be more considerate and negotiate better, but I think Rslash is giving him extra points since he called OP "Lazy" when from my perspective, this thing we have sounds more medical

[@CountessJJ]

He already makes her do most of the chores apparently so I don't think the fucker deserves breakfast.

[@alexanderhenby1362]

That's what I was thinking, if she would make a big breakfast anyway (depending on how groceries are split, cause if OP does all the shopping that is a whole different story) OP could do the dishes

[@M1chelle124]

Exactly

[@trajano777]

Yeah i mean his logic is not that out of whack except when he was just not ready/willing to do some in exchange gor it.

[@silverflight01]

Story 2: I get that it can feel a little annoying to some people when stuff like this happens, but OP booked those seats early, and that's final. You don't just take a seat that is already booked.

[@lorilancaster5917]

Even not factoring OPs weight, she bought two tickets and a guy sat his daughter there without asking. When will people stop assuming plane seats are a free for all

[@Nerobyrne]

I'll help out the dad: Let his daughter sit by herself. It'll do her good to be away from that bunghole for a few hours.

[@jillybean1373]

And factoring her weight, there are airlines that will make heavier people pay for two seats to make sure that everyone is comfortable. She bought those seats for her comfort and the person sharing her row.

[@iononcantomascrivo]

I applaud OP for sticking to her guns. She's absolutely right: poor planning on that entitled father's part does not constitute an emergency on hers. Also, good on her for shutting down that judgmental nasty woman flyer. As for her mom acting all hoity-toity, she'll either get over it or she won't. I think her dad was totally right to laugh.

[@BronzeDragon133]

Yep. You book the seats, you pay for the seats, they're your seats even if you want to sit your invisible pretend wife in that seat and have an invisible, pretend tea party.

[@autumn-wo6ov]

I love R/Slash's genuine reactions to the stories: "OH my GOD!!!"

[@tax1643]

Story 3: Don't forget the pass to the Qatar games, buying "knick-knacks", drinks, going out for dinner, all the other things you do on vacation. Sure, the guy earned the money, but it sounds like he expects his wife AND kids to make do with his leftovers.

[@madambutterfly1997]

He spent $20,000 on this trip to Qatar and left his family $100 to do something with for Christmas and told them to make it work. If Op has a family that she can go to then grab the kids, leave the house, and leave your wedding next to the $100. No way in hell I'm staying married to somebody who just dropped $20,000 for the world fucking cup and leaves me with $100 shoestring budget for Christmas and expects me to do at least $3,000 worth of things on a $100 budget

[@rainingwhenidie]

Third story is absolutely baffling. Op's husband spent at LEAST $15K, and that's being conservative with the estimates, was gone for a month, and expected op to be able to afford Christmas shopping with just $100. Here's what I was able to buy my family with a part time job. My gifts for my mom, aunt, grandma, and two cousins: $118 My gifts for my dad and both of my cousins' boyfriends: $108 My gifts for my cousin's kid: $100 My gift for my secret Santa: $34 All in all, that's $360, not counting the shirt I got my friend, wallet for a different cousin's kid, and earrings for a friend bc I can't remember how much they were, but it probably upped it to $400. I'm 17, I don't have to worry about bills so all of this was spending money, I had $1200 in my account from saving up. But even taking that into account, this guy definitely could've afforded to give his wife more than a measly $100 when he's going on a trip that cost THOUSANDS of dollars. If he was comfortable spending that much on a month long trip, then I have no problem believing he could've given her at least $1k. Hell, maybe even $600 would've been enough if she could stretch it (but it's still cheap considering the five figure trip). This dude is 100% an asshole and op is justified in being mad, especially since he paid for two other people's expenses.....

[@Josh_the_jester]

And that's not even going into detail about the food expenses, like baked goods, gravy, potatoes or whatever your family desides to have for Christmas dinner, me and my parents made 2 types of fudge, pound cake, cookies with butter cream icing, all that costed us $115

[@Starlight115x2]

To make it worse, OP's husband told her before giving her the $100, that he put aside funds for "Christmas decorations, food, gifts, kids (remember 3 children) needs etc". Like...what?! The dude bled his family's finances to death for this American soccer/football month-long trip.

[@ACAB.forcutie]

@@Starlight115x2 $100 isn't gonna last a month for a single person, let alone a family 😳

[@Crow_Smith]

I used to spend like $200 on gifts [I didn't have a lot of money] but that was roughly $40 per person which was still a pretty decent gift in a lot of cases. [Per person being: My mom, her wife, my dad, my brother and my partner]. My family generally attended to the food, but I know most of the time dinner even for just 3 of us was around $100 after all the ingredients. And honestly I think this year was the year I spent the most on those 5 people, and everyone got pretty much 2 gifts each [except my dad because he got the most expensive thing I bought] so it was closer to $500 - and that's cutting out any costs I did to pitch in for food [but including any amount I gave to others to go "halfies" on their gift for someone else lol]

[@lightning_skullz]

I Smell a pro revenge story waiting to happen

[@JoB1019]

The lady on the plane is most likely the same type who'd complain if the x-plus woman ~didn't~ buy 2 seats. She's a body shamer.

[@freakchickisa]

I came to say this

[@kvproductions2581]

The plus-size lady was absolutely NTA on this story, but that is precisely BECAUSE she bought 2 seats. If she didn't, she'd kind of be TA for ruining the flight for whoever had to sit in the seat she was spreading over. I'm sorry, but if you're that much "plus-sized" that you take up a seat and a half, booking it is the only morally correct thing to do

[@LilChuunosuke]

Yup! It's a lose-lose situation. She's an undesirable. Everything she could've done would be wrong because they saw her very existence as disgusting.

[@someguywithatophat7599]

and probably complains about like, people who are thinner than her calling them 2 dimensional-

[@summerdowlig]

Yes.

[@itscs1175]

Story #1 summed up perfectly "You spend your nights alone and he never comes home And every time you call him all you get is a busy tone I heard you found out That he's doing to you what you did to me Ain't that the way it goes When you cheated, girl My heart bleeded, girl So it goes without saying that you left me feeling hurt Just a classic case scenario Tale as old as time girl, you got what you deserved And now you want somebody to cure the lonely nights You wish you had somebody that could come and make it right But girl, I ain't somebody with a lot of sympathy What goes around, comes back around"

[@cheri1687]

Last story: my fiance wakes up at like 7am..and me 10am by then he's at work. On our days off we both wake around 10am.... I'm up first most of the time, if he asked me to make him breakfast along with mine and my mom's, I would ..an vise versa. Only reason why he doesn't make mine in the morning when he is up before me is cause I don't care for breakfast an it takes me 2 hours to want to eat something. Usually its left overs lol.

[@silverflight01]

Story 3: Him paying for his friend and friend's GF's travel expenses while just giving OP 100 dollars really shows where his priorities lay. He chooses football over his family. That ain't okay

[@shadowmewfred09]

I'd say get a divorce apologise and wrap up the papers for him to open as a Christmas present. Watch his face drain of colour give the economic gaslighting abusive jerk what he deserves

[@KingHayabusa384]

I'd always choose soccer over family.

[@lorilancaster5917]

I’m surprised OP hasn’t blasted him on other social media so his family would know. He should be thankful that he isn’t coming home to an empty house

[@gemrock]

@@lorilancaster5917 In all honesty op should tell her family then pack up everything important to husband and then leave a note saying sorry inflation had hit us pretty hard so I had to sell your stuff so we could eat.

[@kiyoshi058]

I thought the story said it was just for decorations, not for the family to live on correct me if I'm wrong. I've noticed rslash does have a reaction that doesn't tally with the story a few times.

[@yellowbunny812]

I feel like the easiest way to describe the outcome of OPs sister is that karma hit her hard.

[@veronejaquel5106]

Was thinking the same, she got exactly what she gave

[@bibigamer502]

Apparently she never learned what goes around comes around

[@yellowbunny812]

@@bibigamer502 or to never date a cheater that cheats on their pregnant partners

[@Nerobyrne]

@@bibigamer502 in her case, who comes around, goes around 😅

[@iononcantomascrivo]

Cheaters always making excuses saying they don't know what came over them. As far as OP’s sister's goes, it was more of a case of who came over her.

[@W16Man]

Can we all agree that any plus size person with the decency to pay for 2 seats on an airplane is a hero?

[@alexis112]

it is incredibly thoughtful. it almost feels unfair to me that it's a necessity depending on your size. feel like there should be more options

[@stephenadkins616]

@[Alexis] bench seats on a flight would be decent. But it wouldn't be cost effective, because certain people would call it (insert phobic bullshit here).

[@palindrome1959]

The fact she even came out and said I'm fat, shows she's quite on the ball and makes her argument even more persuasive.

[@mightyakkylex]

Yess, that's what I was thinking. Like, bruh, you're not the a hole, you're incredibly considerate to pay for another seat upfront

[@TALKINGtac0]

@@alexis112 Or even just a few larger doubled up seats in the back, rather than the usual 3 small ones. If they cost more to make, you can upcharge a bit to compensate for the cost, but still keep it cheaper than buying two tickets.

[@Avoidnow]

Story 1, no Rslash you can’t call him a man. Story 3, I can’t afford to go to the rugby World Cup so I won’t. That’s just life.

[@AzureKyle]

For the last story, if he is too tired to make breakfast for her, they can instead trade off with her only making breakfast, and him only making dinner, so they each make one meal per day.

[@hermeticbear]

He gave $100 to his wife and kids for family expenses for a month for Christmas. He's an AH

[@abiean222]

he's "we won't be here when you come back in a month" material.

[@zacharyjackson1829]

funny how even eating just ramen for the whole month would break their budget

[@mask938]

There’s no way in Hell OP and her 3 kids could last a month on just $100. I don’t think they could even last a week on that much.

[@Suisuihoz]

@@abiean222 if she cant afford a month and Christmas without him shes cant afford life without him💀

[@YourXavier]

Story 3: Does this guy ever do the grocery shopping? It doesn't sounds like he knows what things cost. A full Christmas dinner for the whole family, PLUS gifts? I hope he likes sandwiches and socks.

[@philip8498]

What do you mean sandwiches? At current prices 100 bucks will barely buy you bread for a month when you got three kids to feed. If anything he will get a two slices of bread with a third slice of bread in the middle under the tree. Or more likely the equivalent of whatever that is in potatos. Because on a budget, potatos absolutely rule

[@Robloxian-micheal69420]

​@@philip8498I don't know where you're living but I've never heard of such ridiculous pricing

[@larissa-je8dc]

Honestly I really hope op got some family in the area that can help her and her kids and honestly she needs to divorce him that ain’t a man

[@_viridium_]

Story 2: I'm usually more than willing to accommodate for families especially since choosing seats is very expensive here, but the second it becomes a demand rather than a question my goodwill is thrown out the window. The man should've asked and when you said no, gone to ask for help from the stewardess. It's nice if you CAN help! But sometimes you can't, and that's that.

[@lorilancaster5917]

Or he could’ve, just a crazy thought, book early and get two seats together. I also wonder if he hoped for an upgrade at some point during his “ordeal”?

[@fdm2155]

Agreed. Also the fact that his kid is 12 makes a difference to me. He's acting like he's traveling with a toddler. LOL Adjoining seats is nice to have but is it REALLY critical?

[@arnoldfossman1701]

I don't understand a father wanting his child to share a seat with a stranger. From what OP said it would be clear that OP can't avoid taking up part of her second seat, that would mean that the child would have to share that seat. The man should have looked for an alternative from the start without trying to cause drama with OP.

[@lorilancaster5917]

@@fdm2155 and I doubt OP would be reimbursed for her second seat

[@TarisLuna]

I would imagine that guy and his daughter would have started complaining about OP being in "the daughters seat" if OP would have let them take it.

[@deadonarrivalgirl9785]

I'm starting to think that rSlash is like, the perfect husband to his wife. Ain't no way this man gets that audibly irritated with a story and not be a good guy to his wife. Keep being you rSlash

[@Justice237]

I guess reading so many Reddit stories has given him plenty of info on everything NOT to do in a relationship

[@kranberry3318]

OP: “My husband only gave me $100” (using the sign for dollar, not the sign for pound) Rslash: “I’m going to assume you’re from the UK”

[@makii7408]

I mean, I'm from Germany and use dollars more often than euro online since alot of people understand dollars better, and with pounds that would be even more true since euros are used in more countries than pounds-

[@rhondah.1478]

He primarily assumed UK because the OP said football. Football only means American football in the US, for the rest of the world football is soccer.

[@friend1235]

Story 1 can be summed up by this quote: "When a man marries his mistress, he creates a job vacancy."

[@tailsofchaos]

1st story, even if you could forgive, you won't ever forget what happened the devastated you. And it is ironic for what happened to the sister with the parent saying she suffer worst. Sure, OP never suffer worst on their end. The children definitely need to know the truth behind all of this or they will someday

[@g.b.2806]

I love your opinion on the first story. While I generally enjoy karma being a bitch, I do agree that a miscarriage is not something anyone deserves to go through.

[@fagaction]

Nah. But she does desere the man leaving her at her darkest moment.

[@xoana4197]

No, but the parents are such assholes. Like, they talk about how OP should make up with her sister because "she's going through something noone deserves". Yet when the exact same thing happened to OP, they didn't seem to care that much.

[@firepuppies4086]

I feel no pity for her, I pity the child that was lost, but... I feel no pity for the sister

[@SidereusOfTheFallen]

I agree, but the point of not nuking your relationships is that you never know what might happen. No one deserves to go through a miscarriage, but if you nuked all your closest relationships and no one comes to your bedside when the unthinkable happens, it's the consequences of your own actions.

[@FishAnvil]

Less that she deserved a miscarriage, more that the kid deserved better parents. Let's be honest, OP's sister and ex are not going to stop at just abusing their parents, OP and each other.

[@wickkdd]

About the last story: I'm not sure if it's because I'm not from the States (I'm from South America) and maybe it's a cultural thing, but I feel it's almost disrespectful to cook only for yourself when you have a partner? And don't get me wrong, I can be very selfish sometimes, but if I'm already cooking for myself what would cost me to cook a little bit more for my SO? I wouldn't do it expecting anything in return other than washing the dishes. I dunno, just feels selfish cooking only for yourself and I mean, reciprocation is always great, but I wouldn't do it expecting much other maybe helping wash the dishes (which I take from my sister's and her boyfriend's agreement: he cooks, she washes the dishes). While I do agree that OP is also very selfish not offering much in return, I think this one is more on the ESH scale (and not a very break-up worthy situation tbh, just a moment of self reflection on both sides and a little bit of TALKING TO EACH OTHER CALMLY would resolve everything)

[@wickkdd]

Quick add: Hmm, reading the comments here and seeing how OP has been replying people on Reddit and basically showing how useless he truly is, I understand the girlfriend now. Definitely a NTA for her since apparently she's the one doing everything.

[@internetpersonayy]

I agree with the comment above me if there is that added information. The main story, however, is written in a way where the girlfriend does look like TA. I'm from the United States (could vary on area, but it's the same for me), and not cooking something for someone else when you're already making something is kind of rude. Unless the amount of food is volumes more, it takes no extra effort to cook for an additional person. Adding a few extra eggs and bacon is not difficult and does not take any more time. Part of a relationship is communicating. If the boyfriend was truly unable to function in the morning, I'd assume the girlfriend would be more understanding. However, if the boyfriend truly is lazy based on the other comments, it's understandable why the girlfriend was reluctant.

[@jh9297]

I am from the states and i agree i feel it is rude to only make for urself unless they dont want or ur home alone its just the polite thing to do. I cook u clean i feel is fair

[@ArtyMcKenzie]

I'm an American and I thought similarly, even down to the preference of a cook/clean arrangement. Idk if it makes a difference, I'm a southerner. We're accusing OP of being transactional, which he is, but not the gf, which she also is. But that aside, if I were cooking for myself, I'd feel bad letting my spouse eat oatmeal (ofc if that's what they prefer then whatever) and its generally regarded as poor manners to just cook for yourself (again, relationship circumstances). However, I don't tend to set up meals on this level of division of labor but since that IS a part of their division of labor calculation then I broadly agree more with the gf that they should alternate. OR alternatively, since his complaint is that he's not a morning person then he can make all dinners and she makes all breakfasts. ESH but more suckiness from the bf than gf.

[@chronicwalker9038]

Germany here, agreed.

[@ZonkRulz666]

Fun fact about the World Cup husband the average UK household spends £1100 on Christmas

[@catkin567]

Not sure what the UK average has to do with that story. It's the US average spend on Christmas which is more pertinent!

[@ZonkRulz666]

@@catkin567 RSlash was guessing UK. Did you listen to that bit or do you just assume that every story is set in the US?

[@catkin567]

@@ZonkRulz666 Thank you, I heard that bit, but the OP says 'mom' and talks about money in dollars, which is not the UK, did you miss that bit or do you assume dollars is currency everywhere?

[@ZonkRulz666]

@@catkin567 and America is the only country in the world that use Dollars for currency?

[@catkin567]

@ZonkRulz666 hmm what countries say 'mom' and use dollars .. maybe Canada too, but certainly not the UK, lol

[@franciscojaviermendezrinco1902]

First story: I wonder how this story doesn't make deserving the sister and the ex's family doesn't deserve 5/5 buttholes. The sister betrayed her and now SHE'S IN THE SAME SITUATION OP WAS IN WHEN SHE BETRAYED HER. And the husband did a repeat.

[@ArtyMcKenzie]

Yeah... plus there didn't seem to be apology in sight AFTER years of NC... It's like they thought "oh, who else do we know that would understand the emotional toll of having their partner cheat on them while miscarrying in the hospital, alone?" (Also, can I just say, it doesn't even sound like sis was alone, she at least had her parents, which I don't think can be said of OP). Then they just never got any further than "my daughter needs support, phone a friend" so they forgot to consider who participated in OP going through that in the first place, how little help they were, and that OP isn't their friend as a result. Just... short-sighted on so many levels.

[@peachberry9774]

i don't think there's anything wrong with asking his girlfriend to add breakfast for him as well if she's making a spread for herself in the first place, but he has an attitude problem. He should offer to make dinner more often or take her out to places or add a bit more chores to his routine after she asked to be compensated. Personally, I'd just make breakfast for my partner as well if I'm already cooking, but if she wants to split everything fairly that's well within her rights to ask of him and he should accommodate that instead of demanding she just do him the favor every morning

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Exactly

[@chrisallen9296]

When did relationships turn into transactions.

[@satsujin4027]

Idk, he says she makes a giant breakfast. Making double will take double the time. What if she wants to use that time to do something else. My mom wakes up early and makes a nice breakfast and she have one simple rule: if you wake up at the same time as her, she will make a share of breakfast for you, if not, then u can make yourself some breakfaat when u wake up. She decided upon this after a few time she made extra and left for my father and he decided "today I dont want this or that"and just left the food. My mother HATES to waste food. So if you wake up with her u can tell her what u want and she willmake it. If not, u make ur own food.

[@jaymevosburgh3660]

@@chrisallen9296 They have always been that way for some people. It is not a new issue. Some people just suck at being in a relationship ov any sort.

[@chrisallen9296]

@@satsujin4027 No it won't. That's not how cooking works. Cooking 6 strips of bacon takes no longer than cooking 3. Same goes for sausages. he's not asking her to cook anything else. Just put on a few extra pieces of whatever she is making for him. That will have no effect on how long the meal takes to cook

[@HunterRaider13]

Story 3; $100 used to buy a month’s worth of groceries in the early 2010’s. Now $100 won’t even cut it for a weeks worth of shopping. It’s disgusting what her husband did.

[@proxyl0rd787]

I actually wanna give the person in the 2nd story huge props for buying the 2nd seat knowing that it may be uncomfortable for a 3rd person due to their size. I recently flew and had someone sticking into my seat, from under the armrest a good 4 inches, but it was a full flight so nothing really you can do about that.

[@mmongoose21]

If I could afford it I totally would. I definitely try to take up as little space as I can when flying.

[@vidhead85]

So, Sister cheats with her sister's husband while OP is in the hospital suffering a miscarriage. Then is not only surprised when this happens to her, but wants her sister to meet her kids that she had with sister's exh. I mean, she put this in motion when she cheated with a cheater then married him. She deserves everything that happened to her absent the miscarriage Plus Sized Switch: NTA, you prepared, they did not.

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

NOT ABSENT STILLBORN PART! SISTER DESERVE THAT TOO AS IT MADE HER SITUATION SAME AND NOW SEE OPS PERSPECTIVE TOO LATE!

[@Oreztar]

my partner and I had entirely different body clocks. He was a morning person, I am very much not. He liked breakfast, was bright as a button right out of bed, I couldn't bring myself to eat in the mornings, and struggled to interact until I'd had a while to wake up. So I took care of dinner and the things that needed doing in the evenings, he did the morning stuff. We worked around it the way you do any other personal quirks you both have. Your body clock isn't necessarily a choice; there are actual studies suggesting people's body clocks are different, and we are naturally wired to be either a morning or evening person. Its not being lazy, or any other negative assumption people like to make, its a genuine thing. Its thought to be an evolutionary tactic to ensure some people in the group were always up during the night for safety/security reasons. Makes sense. Ever since I was a kid my natural body clock wants me up to the early hours, I just cannot sleep early, and I cannot get up early. I am 41, I've had a lot of years to try and be a morning person, I've had jobs where I had to start at 7:00am. Did a year of getting up at 6:00am change my body clock to being more functional and awake in the morning? NO. Not in the slightest. I was STILL unable to sleep until 3:00am each night. It was as alien to my body as asking anyone else to go to bed at 4pm. Next time a morning person bounces in on me at 8:00am with their 'OMG ITS A NEW DAY, LETS EAT A HUGE MEAL AND DANCE!!!' energy, I feel like doing the same to them at 4:00am when Im up and active and hungry, and they are trying to sleep. Im guessing they suddenly won't be as tolerent. That said, not saying the OP in that story wasn't being a little petty, but I do think its important to realise how one feels in the morning or the evening isn't necessarily a choice or something they can change. You just arrange your life around it.

[@martletkay]

Yeah, I feel like the girlfriend is being pretty unsympathetic and selfish. It's just not that hard, and if you actually love someone, it's even less hard. We don't choose our metabolism or body clock. It is SUPER hard to change your natural rhythms, and super easy to just... throw in some more bacon? I dunno. The fact that this went on for years without her ever offering to make some for him as well is pretty weird, and more troubling than anything else to me. It's like, she's allowed to ask more of him, but he's not allowed a simple piggy-backing favor from her? If it was me I'd have offered to make him some from from the start! Because that's what ACTUAL love is? I dunno, I live with people who have, at times, aggressive food insecurities from growing up as well as selfish food partitioning (like refusing to share but asking/expecting others to share, and getting food out and not asking anyone else if they want some, knowing full well anyone else would also love to have some, and either never thinking about asking or purposefully not asking), which has instilled some food anxieties in me. Having seen and experienced this, tThe idea of denying someone basic access to the same food you're eating is kinda messed up, not gonna lie.

[@TipTheScales27]

Yeah but you’re actually contributing to the relationship. He’s not. Big difference! People kept prodding him in the comments about what he contributes to dinner… he was lying about helping her out. He seldom makes dinner. If his girlfriend feels like he isn’t contributing enough to the relationship and snapped at him wanting breakfast too, she is allowed to feel that way

[@alidan]

me sitting here being able to sleep at any hour, and wake up at any hour. I need to be awake at 3am, just power may ass to be awake for 20+ hours, and it resets when I can sleep. never understood how anyone cant be awake in the morning if they want to be, get up eirlier sleep eirlier, if need be 24+hours of running will reset when to sleep if accompanies by an alarm to get up.

[@beheroot]

when i'm writing this, its 4:27 am :> So i know exactly what are you talking about. And my partner is morning person, sleeping for a few hours now. So... he walks the dog in the morning, i do the evenings. but when he got cold, and couldnt go with doggo .... that was horrible for me ;P Aaand my back hurts in the morning so cleaning what dog did wasnt easy task >< And painfull. But it did not cross my mind to tell him to go outside while he is burried under tons of used tissues and has shivers 'because its his tuuuurn' :> I think OP and his GF didnt grow up enough to be in relationship...

[@abiean222]

@@alidan the amount of jealous hate i'm sending you could power a city

[@Tontteman]

Story 3: she should divorce him, that way she can get alimony from him to actually pay living for her and hers kids. And house and everything in it, take everything, only thing she doesn't really need is him.

[@Dragiare]

Story 1 The sister got ironic karma? Oh my god. Lol

[@thetruth1816]

"BUT BUT FAMMMILY".." YOUR SISTER IS REALLY SOOOORRYY"..lol what a crock..

[@swampwitch6133]

@@thetruth1816 I know right? She only felt sorry about it after she got her karma by having the same thing happen to her and found what it felt like to get fucked over. I say fuck the husband, sister, and the parents. Me personally? I would do the same thing she did and have nothing to do with any of them.

[@HetaliaGirl1]

@@thetruth1816 OP's sister is obviously the Golden Child.

[@thetruth1816]

@@HetaliaGirl1 yup..I can't stand parents like that..

[@morphstarchangeling8024]

That man in the first story deserves a 6/5 for how horrible he was. We've seen horrible on here, and he somehow is worse than all those people.

[@michaelschmidt4199]

I can understand you not being able to trade off making breakfast since you aren't a morning person, but you MUST find something else extra that you can do for her.

[@blitzyosrs2104]

or dont treat a relationship like a business deal and do nice things for them because you love them.

[@neffyg35]

The husband in the 3rd story is exactly why ladies you can't be solely financially dependent on some men. You have to keep a job for financial independence and always have an exit strategy. What he is doing is so selfish and disgusting and I'm sure if the friend's girlfriend isn't actually his girlfriend, he is at least banging her because why would be paying for her and not her boyfriend. It's really sad here because all of this is doing nothing but hurting the kids.

[@LLandS18]

Agreed.

[@sourcandy6469]

100% agreed!! It’s so sad that women couldn’t have a job before and were forced to be solely reliant on some mans kindness.. of course financial abuse nowadays can happen to any gender and its terrible in any case. I’m just glad that things aren’t the way they were before where I live at least and I’m heartbroken for everyone that doesn’t share the same privileges as me..

[@SherriLyle80s]

Yep

[@curtisalex456]

@@LLandS18 Yep, i do not understand why someone would voluntarily put themselves in this situation.

[@araxe6644]

And here I thought that relationships should be based on mutual trust, respect and love. I guess not for everyone. Just because the guy in this story is a scumbag doesn't mean this kind of relationship doesn't work for some people. I'm not saying it's for everyone, it sure isn't. Though I think treating your spouse like this is a sign of distrust and definitely isn't leading to a healthy relationship

[@DrGoatens]

1st story: while OP was in hospital *having a miscarriage* he cheated with OP's sister, instead of being with her or driving her home, got said sister pregnant and then tried to act like it was fine, OP was overreacting... what a slug. They're inhuman.

[@lorilancaster5917]

It gives an extra lack of sympathy for sister that not only did he cheat on OP with her but with what OP was going through, his nonchalance about it, and telling OP that she’ll get over the affair like he can dictate her feelings. Sister witnessed this and continued to be with him.

[@spicydiarrhea5662]

op should apologize and forgive

[@savannahs.5874]

@@spicydiarrhea5662 she doesn’t have to do shit for them

[@TetraSky]

Second story : It's your seat, you paid for it. You need both seats to sit properly. The woman complaining to YOU about the lack of planning on the dad's part is just the cherry on top. NTA.

[@DeviantCinnamonfur]

Story 1: The same thing happened to the sister she is now asking for help, except SHE was the one sleeping with her sister's husband, which is infinitely worse. OP is NTA

[@ImNotaRussianBot]

Not to make light of the first story, but the, "Oh my GAWD!" sprinkled in throughout your reading were hilarious.

[@GeoToni13]

I have lived story 3! My dad left me, my brother and our mum (his wife) to go off to Disney World Florida, at Christmas with his Girlfriend! Both me and my brother were only young, around 6/7 years old. He literally left us three with nothing. Not even £100! So my mum went F that, and (btw this was early 90s) took a copy of his credit card and bought a Christmas hamper and gifts for my brother and I on her catalogue. Afterwards my mum did speak to a friend of hers who was a police officer and he basically said that my dad could take her to court over it but it would not look good on him, esp if my mum told the truth. She wasn't working, literally had no money and was left with two kids to look after. He never did press charges or even confront her, he came back and just complained that someone had used his card. My dad was a complete and utter ass. Thankfully no longer in my life!

[@lazyk7997]

Wait was he cheating with your mom or are they divorced bcuz of the girlfriend part??

[@GeoToni13]

@@lazyk7997 when my parents were still married he had a girlfriend. So he was cheating on my mum. They hadn't separated then cause my dad was a cheap git (to us and my mum, not to his girlfriend) and was doing everything he could to make my mum jealous so she would leave. (he even offered my mum 5k to leave and take us as He wanted the house for himself!) She wasn't gonna let him do that though and I believe it was the next year she kicked him out.

[@lazyk7997]

Oh well that's good for you and your mom glad she kicked him out good for your mom

[@itsOasus]

Story #3 is absolutely deserving of the rare 5/5 score. I know you gave one already. But honestly. I think this financial abuse and HIS entitlement is deserving of it.

[@etcetera1995]

Well now the sister in the first story knows what it's like. She got exactly what she deserved.

[@tully6648]

She sort of knows, anyway. Because she at least gets her parents rallying behind her and helping her, whereas OP got none of that. OP's sister, mom, and dad all deserve each other.

[@terraguttierez2996]

who can say golden child !!!

[@abiean222]

@@tully6648 like yeah! where was OP's parents when OP lost her baby and found out about her cheating husband. we know where her sister was at least. such hypocrites, i wish OP a long and happy life with her new family.

[@Edgypoo]

she didnt deserve to lose the baby imo ( i dont feel bad for her though) but she should have seen the cheating coming lmao

[@RudesMom]

@@terraguttierez2996 Probably why she thought sleeping with her sister's husband wasn't an issue in the first place.

[@09EmBeR90]

I gotta hand it to RSlash for dishing out insightful relationship do's and don'ts here and there. First time being in one and honestly, he's like that uncle voice in my head giving me advice and it's really given me perspective. Thank you Dabney

[@pamelalejeune2424]

Not only did this man miss Christmas he also skipped Thanksgiving so in all actuality op didn't even have enough money to make it a Thanksgiving dinner. This is you leave him right now take the kids go to an in-laws or or your parents house but get away from him he is financially abusing you

[@frankiehall5211]

The story doesn't take place in the USA so there was no thanksgiving for them to celebrate.

[@thenecroticraptor8338]

Story 3: Wow, "father of the year" here, am I right? "I know, let me bomb a majority of the house's income on a sporting event not just for me, but for my buddy and his girlfriend and then get mad at my wife when she can't do just about anything with the piss-poor amount of money I "saved" for the holidays!" Gimme a frickin' break. OP's NTA. She should get her "husband" a nice, fresh copy of divorce papers for Christmas!

[@shadowmewfred09]

Story 1: NTA traitors deserve no sympathy but they do deserve every last drop of bad karma the universe can provide. Edit: not the still birth that's just awful for anyone to go though, I meant her being cheated on by a known cheater and breaking down.

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

ACTUALLY THE STIL BORN ALSO KARMA BECAUSE IT MADE THIS INCIDENT UNEXPECTED EYE FOR AN EYE AND MADE SISTER FULLY SEE OPS PERSPECTIVE! STOP BEING WEAKLING AS WAS RSlash!

[@shadowmewfred09]

@@klemenhudobreznik3421 actually you throwing essentially a temper tantrum like that is being weaker then you claim I am. No one should suffer something that horrific no matter how evil they are and boasting such makes you no different to them. Until you've seen a dead baby and smelled it you have no right to say it was "deserved" justice is blind not heartless her being cheated on and being abandoned realising her mistake is enough

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

@@shadowmewfred09 SAY PERSON DEFENDING POS OF SISTER WHO CLEARLY NEVER CARED ABOUT MISCARRIAGE DIDNT OPS PARENTS, YOU BEING WITH IT ONE AS WELL! SHE DIDNT EARN HER SYMPATHY OR EMPATHY AS OP WAS BASED AND DIDNT EVEN CARE ON STILLBORN AS HER POS DIDNT ON HER MISSCARRIAGE! GET HELP YOU SICK ENABLER OF CHEATERS!

[@Bladewalker1]

With the story of the husband who spent 20K, for him, his buddy and girlfriend to go watch the world cup in person for a month... but only leaves 100 for Christmas. My suggestion would for the wife to use that 100, towards changing the locks on the house. Then spend that month, getting a head start on divorcing her husband.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Good idea

[@Barfyyyyy]

Last story. I'm in the same boat as the gf of op. My guy doesn't wake up as early as me, but I still go out of my way to make him something. And op is right, it really isn't that hard to make for two people. It's fair for me that if I'm going to have breakfast, so should my guy.

[@crossofoxy7323]

i'm happy i'm not the only one thinking that the op was just right on this one

[@mask938]

You don’t know the full truth. People in the comments kept asking OP what the division of labor looks like for him and his girlfriend, and OP kept trickle truthing them until they all figured out that the girlfriend does that majority of the work (groceries, house maintenance, chores, etc.), the 50/50 split of dinner is actually the task being given to whoever gets home first (which is almost always the girlfriend), and all OP does is make the bed and yard work sometimes. OP is a lazy, entitled manbaby who treats his girlfriend more like a maid with benefits than a girlfriend.

[@ThingInTheHall]

​@mariamisah3093 reported lol scambot

[@osteoclast6884]

The last story: NTA. Mornings don't suck for everyone. In a relationship, if your partner has difficulties in some areas, you help them. I don't get people who see everything as a transaction. If you love someone you want to take care of them and make their life better. If you're already cooking it really doesn't require much extra effort. And the point of the request is that he needs help in the morning so how does it make sense that he does breakfast on some mornings. OP probably helps his gf in other areas. Help doesn't even have to be chores. Emotional support is also important.

[@thalianox2492]

The husband goes on a month long vacation, paying for two friends but calls his wife spoiled?

[@LLandS18]

Story like this is why I would never never be a stay-at-home mother. I couldn't let anyone have that kind of control over me and my children. Not that I have any right now. Edit if being a stay-at-home parent work for you that great. But it not for me

[@christinawahlberg6805]

For the last one, the division of labor to me is clear: if she takes over breakfast, he should take over dinner and lunch is free form.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Agreed.

[@kvproductions2581]

She already makes breakfast, she's being lazy and trying to get him to do more chores in exchange of just adding an extra egg or whatever to a breakfast she already makes that mindset of turning such a minor thing into a transaction is awful OP should've offered to take over dinner, yes, but the girl is also TA for nickle-and-diming her SO like that

[@lifewuzonceezr]

@@kvproductions2581 she makes most of the dinners AND does the shopping

[@kvproductions2581]

@@lifewuzonceezr They said they swap for dinners. Plus, I'm not saying the division of labor is good, or that OP is NTA. I'm only saying that, with the context we have, she is also TA

[@BeanManolo]

First story: I noticed OP mentioned her sister called her at work on her work phone. That shows OP blocked everyone from her family after that mess, and they went out of their way to get her work phone (since it wouldn't be blocked like her personal ones) just to pester her.

[@unholyglee5306]

The escalating “…oh my GOD!” as the first story went on is [chef kiss]

[@ochitakishi2350]

1st story, she got what she deserved. No if and or buts; Karma, greater power, spirits, God's, doesn't matter. She got what was comming to her. Not all of the powers that be work in beautiful ways.

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

Amen.

[@grizbear4115]

Story 1: You KNOW FOR SURE they aren't sorry AT ALL when they go ahead and get together after the cheating.

[@ghostdagreat]

Man, I can't say I'd be mature enough not to tell the sister "Now you know how it feels." in the first story. Goddamn sisters complete lack of self awareness is commendable though.

[@LightBelI]

Breakfast story: He should have offered to clean the dishes or anything she uses for the breakfast if he isn't doing that already on the chores

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Exactly, give and take, if you want more offer something in return

[@jeannebuttons5301]

Tickets To Football: I know the stories a little old and we now all know how bad the conditions were at the Qatar game, I slightly hope that the husband in the story did not get to enjoy himself in any way. I also hope that OP found a solicitor after reading the responses on Reddit and had divorce papers ready in time to gift wrap them as a Christmas present.

[@Nyax50Lopez]

3rd story: HOW TF $100 WILL BE ENOUGH FOR A CHRISTMAS CELEBRATION?!?! tree is like $300+ for the fake ones, decor varies so around $80 - $100, food around $50 - $80 to cook. Presents varies too from $15 - 30 per toy. Like wtf is this? Also for almost 1 month and a half is INSANE WTF I just hope OP contacted her husband's family about the situation and how much he left so they can help a bit with food purchases. My god. He should be exiled immediately from parental license *nods nods*

[@frith.calluna]

OP in story 2 literally did everything she could to make this experience as comfy for herself and others on the plane. It's not her fault that someone else didn't book seats in advance🤷‍♀️

[@ismae-rienne4991]

Reminds me of my great uncle that, following an old-timer's advice, and gave his wife $30 a month to run the household. In 1960. With 5 kids in the family. That $30 was to cover groceries, cleaning supplies, clothes, and gas if she had the car. Yeah, my other great uncles kicked his butt when they found out.

[@madgevanness4011]

Heard a story where 2 frugal people had agreed on a certain amount per month. Problem was inflation! and he wasn’t aware of how that affected food prices. So she started feeding beans and cornbread every night for a week at the end of the month, oatmeal w/o sugar or raisins for breakfast, whole lot cheaper to cook from scratch, no butter, peanut butter sandwiches for lunch. He got the point, he was a meat and potatoes guy. Worked out a system based on the CPI for increasing the food budget.

[@madgevanness4011]

Btw, maybe in 1930…..

[@papabear1333]

Story 2: If you paid for the 2 seats then it doesn’t matter if you don’t want to share. 😂😂

[@moonsaces2122]

Story 2: When I was 8 my family went to Disney and on one of our flights my Dad wasn’t able to book us seats together. He took me aside before the flight, explained that I couldn’t sit with him or have a window seat like I had been but it would be okay and he wouldn’t be far. I sat next to a very nice lady and her adult son with my Dad a few rows ahead of me where I could see him. Somehow I managed to survive just fine with my snacks and my Mrs. Piggle Wiggle books.

[@AshendrisSilvermist]

I've never thought you were overly harsh on entitled parents, Dabney. You deliver the verbal justice that's needed and deserved. You have a strong moral compass - and that's a feature - not a flaw.

[@mikesbarn1858]

In the last story I make my wife breakfast and lunch every morning before I leave for work. I organize her medications I put a glass of water, milk, and juice out then make my breakfast before I leave for work. Dinner during the week is whatever I can throw together for us. Weekends I have time to prepare really good meals with all the fixings. OP step up you do ALL dinners and she will do breakfast. Then you do the dishes. And if you want lots of passionate hugs do all the housework naked. She’ll love it.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Exactly

[@channingbartrug9610]

But he did say he does dinner

[@desireeloveros1055]

@@channingbartrug9610 Like once or twice a week He got caught lying in the comments

[@wannabehistorian371]

Wait, I didn’t think that he left 100 bucks for living expenses, I think it was just for Christmas. Right?

[@lorilancaster5917]

Yes but it was to cover everything for Christmas. Food, gifts, etc

[@alexanderhenby1362]

Dude said he left money for gifts, decorations and food. Dude wants the house decorated with that 100.

[@lorilancaster5917]

@@alexanderhenby1362 he must think they live in 1822

[@teamfmreborn7045]

Story 1: BIG FAT OBVIOUS NTA The stillborn part was sad don't get me wrong but the rest of it was karma it's pathetic that not only did OPs parents side with the sister and ex husband BUT TOO EXPECT OP TO BE THERE WHEN THE SAME THING HER EX DID TO HER HAPPENED TO HER SISTER

[@lorilancaster5917]

Also sister will get something out of the divorce whereas OP left empty handed. I hate what the sister went through but it doesn’t warrant guilting OP back into her life

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

ALL OF IT IS KARMA ALSO THE STILLBORN AS NOW SISTER FULLY UNDERSTANDS OPS PAIN! STOP MAKING THAT PART NOT KARMA AS SADLY YOU AND MANY HERE DONT KNOW WHAT KARMA CLEARLY IS THEN AS IT INVOLVES THAT TOO! EXAMPLE BEING EVIL PERSON GETS CANCER IS KARMA IN WAY TOO AS BAD THING HAPPENING TO BAD PERSON!

[@rosebud100623]

3rd story: I would've taken screenshots of how much decorations, food, and presents cost and sent it to him to prove how $100 doesn't work for a whole FAMILY'S Christmas

[@iamfish9223]

The guy who wants his girlfriend to make him breakfast clearly thinks that the girlfriend just waked up and is like: “GREAT, LETS MAKE BREAKFAST BECAUSE I LOVE DOING WORK!” Like op, your girlfriend gets up to treat herself, she WORKS to treat herself, its not something she enjoys but she does it to reward herself at the end.

[@Maria_Miciano_5]

It’s hilarious that the husband in the first story cheated on both women. The sister thought she would have a loyal husband. Poor OP is the victim and I’m so happy that she found another man who hopefully will respect her unlike her ex. The mother, father, and sister are all a**holes.

[@maieen2665]

*First OP:* I like rSlash's interjections throughout the story because same, dude! While it's awful what happened to OP's sister's baby, I don't fault OP for not having any sympathy. OP is NTA. *Second OP:* How _dare_ OP not give up one of the seats she paid for! Seriously, the hell is wrong with people?! I do like OP's remark about getting split in half, lol. OP is NTA. *Third OP:* It's nice to know OP's husband thinks his friend and the friend's gf are worth more than his family. I feel bad for the kids most of all. -$100 doesn't go very far, but I'm sure OP could do -_-something-_- for the kids. It's not fair for them to lose out of Christmas because OP refuses to do anything to make a point. Controversial opinion, but ESH except the kids (the husband way more than OP).- *Okay, I didn't realize OP's husband left $100 to cover **_the whole month!_** That changes everything! OP is NTA.* *Fourth OP:* If OP's girlfriend dumped him after the argument, can I date her? I'm not a morning person, either, but I could eek out a breakfast quesadilla for her if it means she'll cook breakfast for me in return. It's funny how OP said cooking bacon and eggs wouldn't take much effort, and yet he couldn't be bothered to do so. OP is TA.

[@demosteneswiggin5122]

Totally with you. Specially on the third one. The kids are not at fault here. If I were OP I would take my kids and our belongings to my parents or a friend's house and the husband would found and empty house to spent christmass with his friend and friend's gf that he loves so much to the point he thought they are more important than his own kids. And of course divorce the moment he had put a feet outside.

[@lacko623]

Yeah, for Story 3, OP should definitely take the 100, take the kids back to her parents, have the Christmas celebration and maybe after consulting a divorce lawyer, leave a set of divorce papers for husband with a note saying "I made it work".

[@shykorustotora]

Fourth Story: It sounds like OP has the same thing I do. Don't know what it's called but it takes me about 2 hours to get out of bed. If I rush, I'll feel sick, light headed and I've already fainted and hurt myself a few times. I actually have 0 appetite in the morning, so I typically don't eat, but if I do, it REALLY helps. I do think OP should be more considerate and negotiate better, but I think Rslash is giving him extra points since he called OP "Lazy" when from my perspective, this thing we have sounds more medical

[@Arthion]

@@shykorustotora I mostly agree, some people really aren't morning people. But he definately seems like a bit of an entitled a-hole for not offering much of anything in return like offering to take over making dinner entirely or whatever or picking up more other chores as compensation

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

@@shykorustotora okay so tell me....do you act like the OP though....if he wants her to do breakfast every day then he needs to do dinner every night or aome other chores to even things out. He and you may not be lazy in the morning, but if he isn't talimg on an equal load in the evening when his medical condition isn't acting up then he is a complete butt. And a request/favor was in actuality a demand if you get mad at a no answer.

[@Sage0130]

First story: OP is NTA. This story is literally a betrayal by both her now ex and sister, and it happened on one of the worst days of OP's life. Hell, even if the husband wasn't cheating, he should have been there in the hospital with her, and he wasn't. OP owes her sister nothing. Her parents are also jerks for insisting OP bury the hatchet with her sister. Also, this is why you should never date someone who you know has a history of cheating. There's no guarantee they won't cheat on you. Second story: OP is NTA. Her tickets, her money. If she doesn't want to give up her seat, that she paid and arrived on time for, then that's her right. The woman who switched seats was also rude for giving OP a hard time over this. Third story: OP is NTA. Her husband is spending his hard earned money on two other people so they can go to the World Cup, instead of his children. He's the Grinch here, because he literally stole Christmas from his children. $100 is hardly worth anything for Christmas especially when he spent $20K on this trip. How do you not set aside more money for your family for Christmas? I agree with rSlash that this is financial abuse. Fourth story: OP is TA. If he wants to eat a cooked breakfast, he should at least wake up at the same time as his girlfriend. He should also be willing to cook himself. It's 2022, grown men should be able and willing to cook.

[@samalvarez8776]

That third story, I hope he comes back to an empty home

[@spicydiarrhea5662]

OP is major buttcheeks, she should pay alimony and love her sister's kids as if they here her own. I hope he court will order just that but still... there IS a special place in hell for op to act so selfish and hateful. Allah WILL punish her for turning her back on the family

[@d.persia2548]

What's wrong with asking to be thought of when making breakfast? Rather he's able to cook or not.

[@eeveefan132]

You’re kinda missing a key detail in the second story; OP shouldn’t have let herself get that fat in the first place. ESH.

[@superphantom100]

@@eeveefan132 she said it was a medical condition for one and we don’t her life.

[@brockwiththepot]

For the last story I kinda agree with both sides. It really doesn't take much effort to add an extra portion, the fact that he even has to ask instead of her offering is weird. I honestly wouldn't consider marrying someone who didn't think of me when making food knowing I'm home. That being said it's more than fair to ask him to either switch off on breakfast or do something else. Part of being in a relationship is knowing when to compromise, this is one of those times.

[@annachronistic]

My Dad just gave Mom 40.00 a month when they were married and 300.00 a month child support for 3 kids after the dIvorce. He told friends that Mom was bleeding him dry.

[@Twinklethefox9022]

Yeah .. $100 dollars isn't enough. $100 dollars is barely enough for a Christmas dinner. I feel like those kids will be getting the cheapest gifts from the dollar store while the father is on vacation with his friend. Edit: hearing that he'll be gone a month makes it worse, they'll have already used up the 100 dollars for discounted food that's probably days away from expiring

[@brandykuhnhenn9096]

Calling it now, story 3 husband is definitely cheating with the "girlfriend" he took on the plane

[@zThinquinox]

First story: Ye know what they say “Once a cheater always a cheater”

[@LucasTheLesbian]

As someone who also has a really hard time getting up in the morning n one of my partners liked makin big breakfasts then my proposal would be "ok how bout u make breakfast every day n I'll make dinner every day" or "ok I'll do more chores do do more for u cuz I appreciate u" like that's a normal reaction. OP is just selfish n lazy. I hope his gf sees that n leaves him

[@DatMasterHunts]

Third Story: My god, $100? Are you serious? To be honest Christmas is one of the most expensive holidays, including food, gifts, and even decorations. The husband has no self-awareness when it comes to Christmas, and he even tries to guilt trip you with the kids get no Christmas like the other kids do! That is an ouch.

[@korinomiko]

I’m totally agreeing to splitting chores. But the girlfriend is almost too obsessive on always keeping track on what she did for OP and what OP did in return. ofc she still doesn’t deserve a butthole score for that, but I personally think that in an ideal relationship, there’s no need to constantly counterbalance everything. Sharing chores should happen naturally. Maybe they should talk about that and realize what the other one brings to the table without having to bring it up every time and quite literally putting it on a scale where OP has to balance it with something completely equal. I don’t mean it in a way as to excusing OPs behavior, but there’s definitely a solution to what OP can bring to the table other than making breakfast.

[@avashnea]

She totally DOES deserve a butthole score for that. He's the one not deserving one at all.

[@kvproductions2581]

She definitely deserves an AH score. OP doesn't seem like he's doing it right either, but she was already cooking breakfast, as others pointed out adding extra ingredients would be no effort, and she's trying to get OP to do more chores in exchange of that zero effort. She sounds lazy and uncaring

[@korinomiko]

@@kvproductions2581 yes, you’re right. I don’t know if her behavior is result of disorder, that’s why I wanted to hold back on the butthole score. But even then I guess it shouldn’t save someone from getting a butthole score :D Technically it’ll be a 1 out of 5 imo for both of them.

[@korinomiko]

@@avashnea well I just replied to the other commentator, I personally wanna give them both a butthole score, mostly for being childish and not talking this through and I believe both of them have something to work on.

[@seekeroftruth6728]

Story 2: Mad respect to OP for booking 2 seats. I'm 6'6" and always seem to get stuck next to obese passengers, making the flight super uncomfortable and awkward. Nobody wants to be forced to snuggle with a stranger.

[@lorilancaster5917]

And that lady giving OP an attitude didn’t have to trade her seat either. I guess she was in a mood to give a tantrum

[@nicholasfarrell5981]

I (6'4") got asked to move to a middle seat (feck that) by an extremely obese woman on a flight because she "needed the room". Like, so do I, and I boarded before you; maybe pay for the early boarding next time.

[@soapythecleaningclown5055]

Story 1: Op’s sister in the first story deserved everything that happened to her.

[@sabrinastratton1991]

Nobody deserves going through a stillbirth. But she's still a horrid person

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

@@sabrinastratton1991 YES SOME DO YOU POS! SISTER OF OP IS ONE OF EXPECTION, BY MAKING HER SEE OPS POINT OF VIEW AND REGRET HER CALLOUS ATITUDE TOWARDS OP TOO LATE! EVEN CANCER CAN BE KARMA EITHER AS JUST BAD THING HAPPENING TO BAD PERSON OR THEY MADE FUN OF GOOD OR NEUTRAL PERSON WHO HAD CANCER FOR HAVING CANCER1

[@introvertedspider4857]

Its just good old fashioned karma

[@OutlasterTwink]

Neither of them deserve to go through a miscarriage or a stillborn birth though

[@klemenhudobreznik3421]

@@OutlasterTwink ACTUALLY SISTER DID FROM FACT HER SISTER WASNT SHOWING REMORSE AND EMPATHY TO HER SISTER/OP! AND OP EVEN AGREES WITH THAT BY NOT SUPPORTING HER VILE SISTER AT ALL JUST AS SISTER WAS TO OP, CALLOUS POS NOW GETTING TOTAL RARE KARMA BACK!

[@Dr_Kyutoko]

I doubt the guy would wave a wad of cash over his head and say "anyone wanna switch seats?" Strictly because he was too cheap to book his daughter in a seat next to him. Yeah, I guess it costs more to put two seats next to each other and he was counting on someone just "being a decent person and letting him sit with his daughter" to save a few bucks. Isn't there like a policy where children under a certain age HAVE to be accompanied by an adult? It feels like there should be one. But then we'd lose a ton of Entitled Parents stories. lol

[@RemnantTheWolf]

I'm gonna be honest Rslash, it's pretty clear you are not the cook in your house, based on your reaction to the last story. You know how much extra time and energy it takes to cook 2 extra eggs and two more strips of bacon? All but none. I'm not saying his attitude was great, as we don't have enough details for that. We would need to know tone and exact words for that. But really, he's not asking her to do extra work. He's asking to be included in an activity she's already doing. So why is it now a new job? I think I'm chalking this one up to Rslashes girl is right bias, as had the story been "Hey I started asking my bf to make bigger dinners, which he cooks every night. I didn't used to eat dinners, and snack at the end of the day, but I figured I'd try a bigger dinner. So I asked him to make more so I could have some too and then he asked if we would then both be cooking dinner now and I said no!" And Rslash would have been all over that bf for trying to act like the girlfriend owed him for cooking for him when he was already cooking.