Reading Hilarious Berlin Club Reviews with

The best of Berlin's Nightlife. The worst and funniest reviews of Berlin's techno dungeons.
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www.radical-living.net/berlin...
#Berlin #Nightlife #Radical Living

[@katd7716]

Believe me or not but being from Poland, the fact that you don't need to spend hours before going to the club in Berlin to do you hair, make up and dress elegany fancy clothes is so refreshing and liberating. I don't get people who complain. I finally can be just myself in this city instead of making a doll from myself just to fit high standards. Here, I can walk to späti in my pajamas and nobody gives a damn, I love it, Berlin please never change. That video was fun to watch, like your energy guys.

[@yaylah7314]

The time you save to comb yourself at home is lost anyway queuing and please, don’t over dress but don’t go around in your pajamas!

[@RadicalLiving]

Yeah it always feels weird going out in another city/country and seeing everybody putting on their nicest clothes and make-up. Once the Berlin way of life sucks you in there's no going back

[@katd7716]

@@yaylah7314 well, going out in my pajamas is not something I casually do every day but if I feel like I bought one beer to little, I have späti on the other side of the road and I am already in my pajamas, sorry but I'm not changing just to go out and get a beer 😂

[@yaylah7314]

@@RadicalLiving Man I've lived in Beijing and London and in both cities people have this stupid ”fashion" to wake up and go to the supermarket in their pajamas. In Beijing they also started to go around by bus and the government had to put sign on the street and fire up fines. I am the last one who overdress way before moving to Berlin but for fake sake, keep your fucking pajamas and dirty morning face inside your flat! By the way Berlin is more fashionable than it seems except that this fashion is more going toward the trash side of it than the other side.

[@nikto81]

You should not be walking in your pyjamas in public.

[@mikeys_thoughts3554]

Playing funeral music at the doors of Berhain, Please make a vlog of it that would be hilarious

[@marcoyankovich]

Sean Kingston - "Beautiful girls" at Berghain HAHAHAHAHA

[@RadicalLiving]

Note to self: Don't shoot a video when you're hungover. Don't forget to check out the Berlin Club Map: www.radical-living.net/berlin-club-map

[@GLNFGfngnf]

Which ones? I have just moved to Berlin!

[@antonioholzhacker9933]

Inzzest

[@RadicalLiving]

Yesss Inzzest 🙃 Welcome to Berlin Mathew! There's also stuff at Sisyphos, Berghain, ELSE..

[@MusicForTheMillions]

Radical Living I have been watching your videos for the past 2 weeks. I love Berlin and visited many times. I love your humor and videos.and I can see some people not liking Berlin for all the reasons I love it. Hope to see new ones soon. Are you Instagram or FB?

[@lesserspottedmugwump.363]

Berlin is fucked. Fucking gatekeepers. “Muh dress like”, hipster shite. Guess techno is cool now. Let’s wear stained jeans that cost £500. Bugger off.

[@eleanorrigby7541]

"who doesn't hate it when the Feng Sui in the room is bad?!" 😂

[@whittenaw]

You say you hate suits but you sure rocked that one from the Frankfurt video 🤣🤣🤣

[@VanDGrrl]

Last time I was in Berlin, it was 1994. I woke up the day after partying paranoid /devoid of any memory of what happened . I was confused /could barely walk in a straight line for a few days . Vertigo ...black and blue all over my arms and chest .I have no idea what I took or did . I think I had a good time . I’m sure I did . This city was lit then , and it sounds like it is now . Enjoy !

[@RadicalLiving]

Too bad we can't remember the best of times in this city, full on carpe diem😅

[@suzannecooper5323]

I knew what “boof” meant. I was a gutter punk in San Francisco though. I’ve never been to Berlin but some of what you say reminds me of my time there.

[@elisavieira737]

Your videos are very addictive 😁🍻

[@sgkamp807]

It was quite fun to watch both of you guys! please shoot some more videos together

[@RadicalLiving]

😁 OK

[@yasmina6987]

Thanks for this video! 😊 It made me even more sure that I will never ever set a foot in any club in Berlin ever 😁😁

[@Korutz]

Please excuse the long review, but I'm going to share with you my experience at Berghain. I was in Berlin a couple weeks ago and I was sitting in my hotel bar. I started chatting with a couple guys from London. They seemed normal and told me they were getting ready to head to the worlds coolest night club. I figure it's Saturday night…what the hell. So I ask them if I can tag along. They said no problem. One of them informs me that I should probably change clothes because this place is hard to get into, but they had a connection. They recommended that I go change into black, simple clothes. No buttons on the shirts and no hoodies. They said if I had a black scarf, that would be awesome. Said the door guy loves scarves and black clothes. So I go change and come back down to the lobby. We hail a cab and are now off to this place called Berghain. Upon arriving…I see this super long line that's leading into what looks like a commercial building of some sort. I'd liken it to a warehouse. It's not inviting at all. The guys from London tell me we are going to cut in line. While we are standing there looking for the spot to cut, I take out my phone to check Facebook. One of the London guys goes into a rage and starts cussing me out and grabs my phone. Yelling…"DON'T LOOK AT YOUR PHONE. DON'T USE IT!" "THEY WON'T LET US IN!"…Anyway…we get to the front of the line and there's this creepy looking, older guy with ear rings-face tats and spikes in his lips. Supposedly he's some type of guru in the club scene. He's a weird guy and yes he had a scarf on. He looks me up and down and then waves us in using his pinky…Now things are about to get really weird. Once inside, the music is blasting too loud. You could feel it in your chest. I thought the bass was going to set my heart off rhythm. I tell the two guys from London…"Let's go get a beer!"…They look at me like I am crazy. They offer me these strange looking little pills and I pass. No drugs for me. They both pop them and then start making out! I'm not talking about a little kiss or a peck, I'm talking open-mouth, tongue kissing. It was very aggressive/disturbing kissing. I didn't even know these dudes were gay! I look around and there are 3 or 4 naked guys dancing all crazy with erections. I decide to go get a beer and I tell myself-maybe I'm in the wrong part of the club? Maybe this is the gay section. Nope. The whole club is the gay section! On the way to grab a beer, I pass in disbelief, a bearded guy butt fucking the crap out of another bearded dude. You could smell feces and sweat. I take my eyes off of that situation and it only gets worse. There's another guy, and I kid you not…he's got his arm, almost to his elbow, up another guys ass! I thought it was a magic trick or an illusion. It WASN'T! The guy that's basically getting impaled is enjoying it! I saw one guy getting tag teamed (double penetration style) by 2 guys! I said to hell with this…I'm out of here! As I'm leaving, I remember that one of those Londoner's has my phone. So I need to go to find him. Now there are naked guys everywhere! Sucking each other off. Fisting each other. There was one dude that was riding another guy (cowgirl style) and yelling "Balles Tief!" "Balles Tief!"…I ask the dude next to me…"What's he screamin?!"…He informs "Balles Tief" is German for "Balls Deep"… This Nazi looking guy comes up to me with a syringe and acts like he's going to stick me with it. I jump back and think about beating the shit out of him and he starts laughing and in very bad English says "You vant chemical to keep wake and make you high?"…As I'm saying "NO!"…a loud siren/whistle starts blowing and the whole club starts going bananas! I ask this guy who looks like a vampire…"What the hell is that? Is there a fire or terrorist or something?"…He does this weird giggle and say's the siren means it's "Slip and Slide time!"…100's of guys, the ones that aren't already naked, drop there pants and start masturbating on the dance floor. Evidently, you are supposed to ejaculate on the floor and make it slippy and then naked guys go sliding through it! WTF! I look back and that vampire looking dude is jerking off in my direction. I throw a beer bottle at him and start hauling ass out of there. I run past this one guy that seems to be injured and he's asking for help. I'm a pretty nice guy, so I ask what happened. He bends over and you can see this silicone/rubber looking object barely protruding out of his butt. You could barely see it. He then explains that he had shoved a rubber arm with fist up there and it was stuck! This guy thinks I'm going to help pull it out?!? Get the fuck out of here! I finally get to the exit and I yell to that weirdo door man "YOU SICK BASTARD!"…I hail a cab and make it back to my hotel. That was my experience at the "worlds coolest night club"..I can handle a lot of stuff, but this place was WAY over the top. I will not be back. Never. - Kyle (not me), the review that won the Internet

[@BeastmanG]

This sounds crazy, are you sure this was in the main club or the Laboratory? I've never been to the main club but would like to and hope there is some part on the dancefloor that you could enjoy the music without being cummed on.

[@dylantierney6407]

This has to be a joke. What the actual fuck.

[@mikn6194]

Ahahahahahahaha, this is funny as hell!

[@airpoint9715]

“That’s a hell of an act,” the agent says. “What do you call it?” Kyle: “The Aristocrats!”

[@zalamander2295]

This is all I hear about It i don’t get why everyone wants to go 😂 and like normal people I know they ain’t ever seen shit

[@mikn6194]

You really made my week! I needed something to throw my mind of worries, and your vids worked like a charm! Never thought that Germans could be that hot and have such a good sense of humour. :) Cheers!

[@RadicalLiving]

Thank you so much! Glad I could help 😁 Greetings

[@yonniiisan]

As a gay guy berlin is tempting to me, but as a person who wants to evolve and do something in my life it sounds like hell!! Lol

[@marieluiseweiss879]

As a queer Berliner I wouldn’t agree necessarily. Even though Berlin has this club culture and stuff that’s not all of Berlin many small and big companies offer jobs here and qualified people and foreigners are often gladly accepted and Berlin is definitely a place to rock your career

[@oceaneblk]

Depends how strong you can say no when you need to concentrate on yourself and not be like hyper destructive

[@topquarkbln]

@@joshsmit779 it attracts all kinds of people but it's not mandatory neither should anybody feel socially pressed. Being anti always feels like you have a hopeless crush on something. Just let it be 💚👍😉🤣

[@topquarkbln]

As a gay man I tell you that any place should be livable for you. If you can't control yourself then temptation is everywhere. But literally everywhere so how are you living now? You can answer to yourself, and just relax. 🏳‍🌈💚👍

[@teslathemukemmel2732]

Alex, gosh, who is the handsome 😄

[@AlexWinkler]

Yes it was me that liked this comment

[@dylantierney6407]

@@AlexWinkler please marry me

[@susannabonke8552]

@@dylantierney6407 NOW WHO is the Alpha male Here?

[@NotADuncon]

Serious question. Since there are suited people in Mitte and there are people in high heels looking "conventionally sexy" in areas like Mitte, Prenzlauer berg, hell even Kreuzberg - do they never go to the clubs or do all the rich boho people transform into superfreaks at night?

[@lolkapolka5856]

they do transform ;)

[@oliavolha]

Thanks guys! you are amazing. Waiting hard Berlin clubs to be opened again

[@RadicalLiving]

😭 last time feels like a lifetime ago

[@Natea25]

Thanx a lot, I can't stop laughing, great video! Btw can't wait when clubs will reopen again and I'll come in Berlin! ❤️😍✌️

[@ibisem7470]

The chickpea foam in his drink is called 'aquafaba' and if not disguised in a recipe or not the main component, it has a faint smell/taste of beans. It's supposed to be a substitute for cream or egg whites I think, but doesn't always work ;)

[@HyborianAge]

That was fun. You should do more vids with other people. Maybe some skits? How about filming in smaller techno clubs? Or how about inviting a couple of djs to play at your apartment? Get your best buds and throw your own party.

[@RadicalLiving]

Thanks for the suggests^^ I'll reflect on that😉

[@NANA-tasha]

„Let’s go to Munich to have some fun!!“Hahahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣 You’re great!!! 😆😆😆🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@Okoi05]

I always appreciate and laugh when Berliners joke about Munich and I'm not even german 🤣

[@emmiacha]

It's not even actual jokes tbh haha

[@topquarkbln]

It's envie or arrogance... 😉

[@JamieOGman]

Munich is the goat. Best beer halls, best German food, close to the mountains, nice and clean, no junkies. My kinda town. Berlin is a fuckin shithole that thinks it's hot shit 😆

[@valerietaylor9615]

The other Germans make fun of Bavarians because they’re considered to be country bumpkins. Bavaria is like our Deep South - more rural and conservative than the rest of the country.

[@pashalukovic5026]

A cameo by Daniel Ryan-Spaulding. Cool 🤗

[@katherinegreen9874]

Haven't gone clubbing since 1995 but remember it well...

[@pymcioolbrzym2654]

Berlin always full of weirdest people but it is probably the biggest magnet for visiting city itself ,yes ironic as hell

[@luckyp3323]

i really didnt expect alex to have that kind of channel

[@LisaLightning]

OMG I miss crazy clubs! I miss living in NYC and I think I would totally adore Berlin! In Chicago where there’s just a different aesthetic.

[@Sampler19]

Did you visit Limelight or the Shelter by any chance?

[@admerin6961]

I did wake up in a Munich club once, they have good clubs. I do love good shade throwing though. 😅

[@marytotaldeutsch1336]

Part 2 please !!! hahahahhahahaha I saw a lot on facebook for Berghain from Mädels from Munich .

[@Giulia4151]

This channel should call radical clubbing 🤣

[@lehanee]

Could you make video on ‚Dogs of Berlin’? How realistic is depiction of Berlin and life in Berlin in that tv series?

[@princesspearlthumb]

My favorite was the Funeral Procession review. 🖤🖤🖤

[@bryvalencia]

My god alex.. Your eyes! Soooo charming

[@0animalproductworld558]

Techno is America’s old trend. We are more into homestead, nature, and nice weather now 😅😀🥶😬🤣🤣

[@lizagueniat]

Most wines are not vegan and some beers also not. Reason: process called fining for which egg whites or gelatin or animal protein is used.

[@voyance4elle]

Thank you for explaining 🙏 not enough people know this 💚

[@cutlers3618]

@Max Wooks you know that the animals you probably eat are fead with B12 ?! Animals can't produce it themselfes except the cow.

[@ganbly]

Munich in October fest has also it-s perks and "special" moments xD So yea, Munich can be fun. Folk ladies on tables drinking liters of beer... :))

[@chris_sndw]

Oh my god, is he reading my Berghain review?!?

[@TehMuNjA]

protect yourself folks, wear plugs (ear and butt)

[@ebermtheburn]

Yes!!! The Daniel Ryan Spalding clip!!!! xD one of the best comedians in Berlin

[@Weiss_____line]

Hey could you make a video where you are giving your two cents about Griessmuehle? It's my favorite club here in Berlin and I'm worried af that they won't make it!

[@RadicalLiving]

They already found a new location at the abandoned Bärenquell Brewery in Schöneweide. But it's not clear yet when they'll move in.

[@Weiss_____line]

@@RadicalLiving hey thank you so much dude! I literally just went on a boat past that old brewery and thought to my self this would be a sick location! Can't believe it!

[@lillieeloit1231]

The way you pronounced Feng shui made my skin crawl

[@spring_bean8183]

It's so cool that Alex is from florida and was able to actually move to Berlin. Ugh the actual dream! I'm so tired of "raving" in North America. It's just people going out to show off and not actually there for the music and the atmosphere

[@fritzstammen4535]

Americans refuse to dance. I'm American but i went clubbing for the first time in Europe, and when I got back and saw the scene in the us i was so confused

[@marketakosinova4372]

Hi, this was hilarious, I personally like Zur Wilden Renate events especially The House of Red Doors style ones. But I am from Prague, so I am not shaken by clothing style etc. One more observation, @Alex Winkler looks exactly like Andrew Grey (the actor). Hmmm...

[@JMac-27]

Well I've been stuck watching here after getting lost in my 90's rave nostalgia and stayed after the Darkness laughing gif he's my favorite movie character ever! 👹

[@etherospike3936]

If you don't feel boofed at the end of this club review, then it means you haven' t payed too much atention !

Psst Psst, still one of the funniest part of the video :D

[@RadicalLiving]

😄

[@ivanwilliams7413]

"Boofed" is SUCH a specific reference for that point in time.

[@alexia.noemie]

not ok to normalize being raped, even if it was a joke ;-)

[@rosehuynh1572]

But... It sounds pretty normal there? Like people want that when they go? Especially all these ugly hobos they keep saying are the only ones allowed in haha

[@Bea-zt1pg]

That wasn't funny at all. People are getting weird, laughing at serious and sad things. It's like we're losing our sensitivity and empathy. I don't find jokes like that funny, I keep thinking about the victims who suffered this.

[@captainobvious8037]

I believe you should be allowed to make jokes about everything I bet there are more people into the thought of getting raped, than there are actual rape victims Not really a solid ground to make the whole topic a taboo

[@vic1918]

With all that "never come back" I'm surprised this place still have someone going there.

[@Elkathinka]

Toni is right with that becks beer issue tho ;)

[@DaiquiriFlavour]

You read my About Blank rating (Becks beer = 1 star). Im still sad about this experience :( Bye the way the sex-positive party "poly-motion" was disappointing too. Compaired to Kitty, Pornceptual, House of red doors or my newest favourite Torture Garden it felt like a normal party. At least they provided some hand sanitizer (it was before corona) and some minty mouthrinse (haha).

[@RadicalLiving]

Torture garden in Berlin? Whaaaat. Count me in🎎

[@DaiquiriFlavour]

@@RadicalLiving The first Torture Garden in Berlin was in february at Metropol (nice theatre in Schöneberg). My hair stylist (who is a active swinger girl 😄) told me about the event. It was just amazing. Put KitKat in a theatre and you are at Torture Garden 😎

[@yuliianikolaieva59]

Can’t stop laughing

[@omgsolikevalleygirl]

somehow I could never handle the shadow world side of "clubs" in Berlin... the people at the door annoyed the hell out of me - why wouldn't they just let me in, why would I have to wait for an hour to get in, and then the music is so loud that my ears start to bleed immediately, there is no place to sit and the only way to find any enjoyment of all this abuse and stay up all night is through drugs and half the week would be lost to feeling hung over. Honestly, I'd rather stay at home and have a good night sleep, seems more enjoyable. I guess I missed out on a lot, but in the end that's the route I went most of the time.

[@chickenlover657]

You missed nothing. All those clubs are just cesspools of depravity for lost souls. Watching paint dry is more meaningful than spending an hour in that hell.

[@absolutelyfreestockshots1931]

There is still clubbing going on now during corona? I miss clubbing so much!

[@enricomiceli8704]

Nothing. Almost

[@evanmatthiesen7478]

LOL "your money better spent in Amsterdam" ok buddy!

[@stephenmm5268]

What's a "bump" meaning in the club??

[@anomalija6469]

Alex looks like older brother of the guys who run channel "The Real Life Guys".

[@SU2901523]

Haha. I definitely have seen in berghain haha

[@benjaminjaure4902]

Block the forwarder GENIUS

[@breenaxie4672]

Wow, I have been to Berlin so many times and I never did any of the things you guys mentioned! What a waste! I must go again!!!!!!!

[@CaribbeanCarnivals365]

Maybe those things just aren't for you doll

[@dylantierney6407]

This is so funny

[@rehmatsalim5461]

(how much time it takes for a masters student to learn German language studying in Germany?)

[@elizabethlovett4318]

The last review was the funniest & most questionable. In other words, I liked it. I never believe anything too absurd, especially on the internet, and all the reviews here were funny and make me wonder about the person writing the review. I don't know where people come up with the things they do. The only thing I can assume is that they're either not writing a foreign language very well, google translator is a bit off or the person is drunk or high as they write. It's entertaining either way 😂

[@bingbangbong3159]

This was the funniest one you've ever done

[@chickenlover657]

Nah, it was the boringest.

[@YuLi-gx2ep]

@@chickenlover657 you are the boringest :D

[@annazan4766]

You're FIRE! Especially YOU ;)

[@moodbeast]

This makes me want to go to ALL the clubs in Berlin. To get boofed.

[@hopa-ys2bc]

5:48 "one of the first 4 weeks in berghain" would be more accurate

[@daRich_X]

oh... Munich looks fun... 😂😂😂🤪

[@DjQuienMKTLW]

BURN THE SUITS!

[@GrindingGrindcore]

19:06 sound straight like Cannibal Corpse!

[@niho9370]

Track ID anyone?

[@jardon8636]

funny reviews... lol :|P

[@beawitched5252]

After a night of clubbing, I’d always need to shower and wash my hair which was very long, because it would stink from cigarette smoke and cheap alcohol. I’ll never forget that smell! The only thing worse than stinky nightclub hair, is the weapons grade noxious gas created when the shower sprays water on stinky nightclub hair!🤢 I would hold my breath until the danger passed.

[@Wellch]

Is there a Rhthym and Blues nightclub there.

[@steffenbuettner4294]

I'm from Munich, and I find it's an interesting choice to put "Munich" and "better value" in the same sentence but ok :D

[@nathanguadalupe]

I love Berlin.

[@chrisf8855]

I always go to Club Schweinehunder or Club Schlampen. The best clubs in Berlin!

[@TheJosh1966]

Weeegan! 😆😆😆

[@douglasmilton2805]

I vant to trink ze blood of a wirgin!

[@susannabonke8552]

With emphasis on: Veteran. Like: Dinosaur.

[@eliffferdem]

Alex what is your ig

[@svinecomPLEX]

ahahahah ahahah :D

[@joshuaprime2042]

Omg Alex has the prettiest eyes

[@Wellch]

Maybe nightclubs should play The Beach Boys song “Fun Fun Fun” occasionally…not techno but relevant.

[@life_like_this__1777]

Coming in July from australia …. Can I contact u then and link up for a night out .. cheers

[@crystalharris7394]

💗💗💗

[@yougobi2389]

Komm nach München geh in die Sonne hier gibt es ne krasse Szene

[@AndreiMadsen]

Don’t boof cats, people!

[@valerietaylor9615]

Hear, hear! Cats are beautiful creatures. They should be sacred, as they were in ancient Egypt.

[@ryanboddington8874]

You 2 are hilarious together 🤣🤣

[@sansudar21]

First person to call munich fun for partying 😂

[@valerietaylor9615]

The Hofbrauhaus in Munich was a bit rowdy for my taste ( in addition to which I’m not a beer drinker), but at least it wasn’t sick and depraved.

[@SatSetCooking]

Whats in the dark room 🤔 What the heck is Vegan Drink 🤔

[@faterix7737]

processed beer isn't vegan. theres fishblase in it.mhhhh fishblase.

[@mdlspr12051]

I feel weirdly attracted to Florida now.... ;)

[@dman030]

big peoples for 3 days....turn the lights on!! arrrrrrrrr

[@n8v_sonz941]

Boofed, if you know you know😂

[@0animalproductworld558]

By watching your videos. I believe Germany is way behind 😅 You guys re like us back in the 1960 - 2010 😅🥶

[@0animalproductworld558]

The devil’s club 😅😅

[@ellina9816]

0:20 real fur?!!!!! What?!!!!!

[@Semiosphere]

Hey, I heard Berghain's a museum now. Go and investigate!

[@7520193]

Alex 😍

[@tomdelisle8955]

Are there any German cities into punk?