Reacting To Mrs Midwest | How Many Times Will She Say Nurturing?!

[@JordanandMcKay]

We did a video on Mrs Midwest by request. God is Grey has an amazing video WITH RECEIPTS where she shows that Mrs Midwest aligns herself with white supremacy. That’s why we clown on her. IDGAF what she says that’s half decent if she is promoting racist shit and “save white heritage” crap. 😘

[@JunAlex86]

I found out about her mainly through the channels that discussed that aspect of her. I wonder if she has at least attempted to distance herself from those follows since then.

[@EmiltPaige58]

I love it when Jordan is spicy! From one spice woman to another, never apologize! If people like Mrs. Idiot can't handle it, I hope they choke OK their shock when I tell them where to shove it. This keep sweet attitude that Mr. Idiot is pushing has put me in so many dangerous situations. If someone thinks I'm a bitch then I'll take that as a compliment now because it's so hard to unlearn the keep sweet mentality. When I have daughters I'm going to teach them that their comfort is not worth politeness or niceness. If others can't handle it then it's their problem not yours.

[@oliviawitte3621]

Awe Mckay do you pump Jordans gas for her? My boyfriend does that for me as well! Gas stations are scary af

[@robinsaxophone232]

She reminds me of a Disney Princess. Pretty phony and pretty boring.

[@Ameliamaemay1990]

@@oliviawitte3621 it's a king move and I love that ❤️❤️ well done to your bf and Mckay. We all need to look out for each other!

[@ViolAM3]

NOTE TO SELF: If you have to police your voice and be afraid of setting off your husband for basic help, YOU ARE IN A TOXIC relationship.

[@JordanandMcKay]

YESSS THANK YOU!

[@crabbygirluc9926]

Most definitely!

[@Maiju86]

Exactly!

[@m_piper]

100

[@AnnaAnna-st2je]

Not necessary. I also police my voice around my fiancée because I don’t like when people raise their voices around me so I don’t the Same. Raising your voice can make a problem even worse and lead to one person getting pissed and even more annoyed. No one like to have someone raise their voice and scream and shout

[@raspberryitalia3464]

The fact that her husband is a cop and she's tone policing herself 24/7 is hella concerning

[@Ameliamaemay1990]

Eeeeek so true and mix in White supremacy and we have a very scary situation. Very scary....I don't like her but I also hope she's ok...

[@Allison_Leigh]

@@Ameliamaemay1990 I have hope for anyone to improve themselves and pull away from toxic teachings. Even if they're teaching those things themselves. If she is in fact in a bad situation (not assuming either way) I hope she gets out and gets the healing she needs.

[@Ameliamaemay1990]

@@Allison_Leigh agreed! ❤️❤️

[@dejavu8602]

Im in Utah and 1 in 5 MOs use shallow voices and baby talk. They are all so phony !

[@whatever7588]

Allot of cops secret service agents and people in power positions have control issues and are abusers actually

[@sadfairy20]

Favorite phrase of gentle southern women "aww bless your heart". Sounds very tender and feminine, actually means "you are a fucking idiot". At least it does where I grew up.

[@Monocultured01]

As someone who lived in the south for middle school, hearing that phrase makes me want to throw fists lol.

[@JordanandMcKay]

Oh I’ve heard of that! Also apparently midwesterners will say things that are not even close to suspect to people from anywhere that will be like cursing generations of family sooooooo

[@thunderbraun1569]

"She/he means well" also means "I fucking hate every part of that person" in my growing up experience lol

[@rachelcoloradomy3kidz778]

I DO NOT use it for that reason! I truly mean it literally when I hear something sweet, endearing or sad. It's how I give my deepest sympathy for different situations. I guess I'm the effing idiot . Oh well 🤷

[@Kimboscrub]

OMG, YES!!!! I’m a native Texan and that’s EXACTLY what that phrase means!!! Same as saying “Look at you!” to a baby means, “Shit, this baby is ugly AF!” 😂😂😂

[@emmamurray6639]

As someone with an English degree, I want to point out to Mrs. Midwest that Jane Austen is a feminist author!

[@JordanandMcKay]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@Ameliamaemay1990]

Heck yes!! Darcy fully told Elizabeth if she said the word he would never bother her again....can we say before her time!?!? Like yes Austen! Boo Midwest.

[@Fiona-68]

THIS! Did she ever read her? In context? Like WTF?

[@JuriAmari]

Yep. Sis critiqued the system hard in Sense & Sensibility, Mansfield Park, and Persuasion!

[@Ameliamaemay1990]

@@Fiona-68 lol if she did she didn't get the point 😂 Like the point was Elizabeth wasn't the most “feminine” but her smarts and loyalty to her sisters got her the man of her dreams and that wasn't even her goal. That's what makes it a great love story!! I bet Midwest just liked the descriptions of the pretty clothing 😂 Edit: or she's smarter than she's acting and she's playing us all for views which I see as a real possibility.

[@courtneydunham3836]

“There is no war in Ba Sing Se” made this even better

[@bestaqua23]

This should be the new way to say "stepford wife "

[@stephaniejelnicky7944]

Lolllll I came to the comments to see if anyone else thought the same thing 😂😂

[@Jimmiwashere]

Mrs. Midwest is out here role-playing a discount Disney princess. She was probably out back singing to the squirrels hoping they'd help her with the house work...

[@JessieBanana]

As someone who was a domestic violence advocate for 5+ years this is probably one of the worst videos I've seen in terms of healthy relationships. People being abused often moderate their language, thoughts, and tone of voice, based off of their abusers reaction. She is almost grooming young women to accept this as a normal and acceptable reality, when in fact its 500 red flags and please seek help exiting that sort of relationship.

[@jazwhoaskedforthis]

Ding ding ding, this! 100% this. I recognize doing all this to survive abusive households and relationships. It is suffocating and soul crushing

[@communistsharks6889]

Oh god yes!! Her whole coaching shtick was actually more triggering than I anticipated.

[@kaycee5008]

Yes. Great comment.

[@47missjane]

I feel like when one of my best friends is telling me about a disastrous hookup and I say “oh fuck that guy,” it’s me nurturing her lol.

[@Kimboscrub]

😂😂😂👏👏👏👏

[@LaurynJuhl]

Accurate 😂😂

[@Toywins]

You're doing God's work 😂😂😂💯

[@kaorishimizu1373]

Because you are hehe ❤❤❤

[@thatsSK3TCHY]

The last time I had to shift everything about myself to accommodate my partner it's because he was an abusive narcissist... so definitely red flag factory here.

[@butterbeanqueen8148]

Me too. I’m sorry you had to go through that.

[@marisaveilleux8533]

“Just a heads up, Jordan is feeling spicy today” When is Jordan NOT spicy in these videos?

[@JordanandMcKay]

Fair.

[@greenjean]

When he says that I know it’s gonna be an especially good video 😂

[@edenwinter9055]

teehee... I dunno... I think McKay is actually extra spicey today... buy yes; "When is Jordan NOT spicy in these videos?" Best apostates ever!!!!

[@TheAnneBonney]

😂

[@Constantin9va]

@@JordanandMcKay just giving the people what we want. I adore spicy Jordan!

[@aleksandranygaard]

I work as a vocal and speech coach. I worry her saying “How to speak femininely” is feeding into issues I work with basically every day…I meet too many woman who force their voices high and speak in a very strained way because they were taught to hate their dark “masculine” voices. Afraid of speaking loudly and well projected. #bullcrap

[@TheMrsarahanne90]

Yes! It can damage the vocal structures and create problems down the road.

[@JordanandMcKay]

That is fascinating! And makes me sad that it’s so common!!

[@Gabrieliuka]

Yeah, this basically was "force a sugary voice and hedge more, even in private relationships". Absolute trash, like her interior decor.

[@Kimboscrub]

@@Gabrieliuka And her blush and lipstick!!! She looks like a high school drill team girl ready for the Friday night game.

[@stayawaygrl3480]

True as much as it annoys some guys. Its pretty fake to adjust your voice for them. I never undersood why they teach women to do this you can develp bpd or a personality disorder from it too. Its not a good idea if a guy is that miserable he should leave. Instead of wasting his time with someone that doeant meet his impossible standards.

[@AMFibers]

Her obsession with tone reminds me of how I spoke to my mother growing up. Spoiler alert: my mom's abusive. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@JordanandMcKay]

I think we are all seeing that and wondering how she doesn’t.

[@browniesnofrownies4843]

"I go to a Walmart five miles down the road to poop" I'm literally CRYING laughing.

[@Kimboscrub]

Meanwhile, I call my husband in the bathroom to admire my extra special or amazing poops....... 😂🤷‍♀️ We’re in our 26th year of marriage and we don’t have the energy to care about privacy anymore. 😂😂😂

[@angeldream1]

That part reminded me of “I run to chili’s” on click hole it’s a KZbin channel she talks about using the bathroom there it’s a fun little poem

[@1818dedee]

Pleaasee. Hubby is coming into the bathroom to talk to me while I am doing my business. If it’s not love, I cannot tell you what is anymore. I will never hide bodily function from my partner. We have 3 kids and changed diapers a million time. Everybody has to poop.Maybe because I did my nursing degree that it does not scare me one bit

[@emilyhanson96]

“It is very feminine to be tender when you are speaking, and to make sure you don’t come off as cruel. MEN, however, can be as cruel as they want in their speech. That’s totally fine.” Also, Mrs. Midwest seems to be conflating “feminine speech” with “totally submissive and non confrontational speech.” Every example she gives for the “feminine” way to say something just sounds like someone who is afraid the person they’re speaking to is going to hurt them.

[@butterbeanqueen8148]

I’m sure that’s what is going on with her. Her husband is a cop that comes across as a total ass. And it’s common knowledge that cops have one of the highest spousal abuse rates of any profession.

[@Teajay21]

Yeah she definitely associates feminine with submissive

[@katu-D2]

She uses "nurturing" and "gentle" like Classically Abby uses "classic"

[@JovanDacic]

Brb gotta purchase me a nurturing gentle butter dish and bedside keepsake holder. 💍

[@trisanatandler]

Exactly👍

[@brandy31d]

True they need to comment something on her channel to that be epic

[@erikabautista7072]

Funny thing is I'm pretty sure they're actually friends, Caitlyn had an IG story talking about how she just finished catching up with Abby or something like that

[@alejajm1666]

​@@erikabautista7072 and honestly I don't get that. why would Abby hang out with a literal n*zi

[@hanah32465]

"Does she have a Bump-It in?" McKay always with the hilarious observations on the ADHD wavelength like me 😂😂

[@bestjuliawest]

“That lamp is so fuckin ugly” sent me flying across the room 😂😂

[@AChickandaDuck]

Her trad life brings all the squirrels to the yard 🎶

[@cortney3798]

😆

[@keltai83]

And they're like 'wtf scary woman alert'

[@Pleaselearntothink]

It's funny she talks about maturity. The older I get the less I give a shit about tiptoeing around and making sure I'm super nice to spare everyone else's feelings. For me with maturity comes the realization that you can't enjoy life if you're always worried about what everyone else is thinking or feeling about you.

[@Maiju86]

Yes, exactly!! 👏

[@rachellebuch1983]

This comment is actually a way to live *screenshots for a later day reference*

[@meluvfriends]

"Mature and tender" ah yes the green beans are ready for harvest. Wtf else can that refer to in an actual conversation

[@Sloanewaxwing]

If someone talked to me in her “nurturing” way, I’d feel like they were being SUPER condescending. Not here for it.

[@kinndah2519]

That's a shame you come from a place that doesn't know how soft speaking feels like. My ex used to abuse me bc he thought I was " too calm & nice" that I must be hiding something. I left him as soon as I had the chance. Ppl like us just don't feel like being angry all the time.

[@eboni1346]

@@kinndah2519 I feel you but some abusive people use sugary sweet tones to get away with stuff. There's more than one way to manipulate through language

[@cortney3798]

I am a Launch Engineer (only female in the group) and giggle thinking of speaking like this while leading a meeting or talking to customers/suppliers.

[@issecret1]

Yeah, but that's more about how shitty they are

[@rascal342]

I’m honestly worried for Mrs Midwest? The examples she uses as “harsh” are so normal, plus repeating that it’s not fake or acting but “improving the spirit behind the language”. Seems like an excuse you’d develop by telling that to yourself. Like it justifies that if your husband gets mad at you, then you must have offended him with your speech? It’s all the wife’s fault. She wasn’t tender enough, gentle enough, life-giving enough. The nurturing voice gets used like a dog showing it’s belly, a show of submission to placate an aggressor. And she even brings up how the sweet act could be used against her, but don’t worry, if a stranger(like the bad people her husband tells her about) tried to hurt her, she could just say no. That part of her video is just the final red flag on top of an already very tall mountain of red flags. Concerning.

[@rebecca7856]

I feel the same. Plus, statistics show that many cops are abusive to their partners.

[@alexandraguy2931]

@@rebecca7856 yeah, they are like 6x more likely to be an abuser than in the rest of the population :l

[@clan_fraser19]

Very well said.

[@jazwhoaskedforthis]

Nobody deserves to be abused, but I have a reaaaally hard time being sympathetic to bigots. Still, hope she’s not in that situation for real. It’s 100% as you say though, I remember using that sort of softer tone and modulating my speech in a very “dog showing it’s belly to placate an aggressor” kind of way. Perfect description.

[@hthrnbls1722]

More importantly, why are we expected to be the only ones who notice the damn trash is full?? Your husband has eyes… you shouldn’t have to ASK him to do anything!!

[@JordanandMcKay]

An adult with two legs, two eyes, and a brain shouldn’t need to be told to get it out if it’s full.

[@loracorwyn3713]

Or just take it out yourself when it’s full? Never understood why men are always the ones taking out trash.

[@jeswith1s2009]

Exactly!!! I have a 9 year old, that’s one of his chores, but if he nor I can’t handle it I’m just like “Hey, Hubs! The trash is too heavy I need you to get it. Is that cool?” 😂😂 I shouldn’t have to sweet talk my husband into doing a basic household chore that any of the 3 of us can do.🙄

[@bethm4053]

Major Dolores Umbridge vibes! By the tone of her voice, it sounds like she’s trying to hypnotize me. Creepy!

[@michy8457]

I agree totally

[@butterbeanqueen8148]

Most narcissistic men have this same opinion. “Woman don’t take that tone with me”.

[@rosebud7233]

As a speech language pathologist myself, she uses "language" when she is talking about speech. Vocabulary is part of language, but "tone" and "cadence" are speech.

[@rosebud7233]

I know she isn't. I meant that I am. I have edited my original comment to make that more clear.

[@gingerchaosmuppet9007]

If I’m considered less feminine because I use my hands in natural ways as I speak… totally down for that. I’m already ten points ahead because my blush looks natural. My filthy mouth is life giving. To me.

[@JordanandMcKay]

Boom, roasted.

[@Toywins]

I don't know what went wrong with that blush, but she looks like she slapped herself with the makeup brush on both cheeks. A little self flagellation for using a firm tone with her husband before the video.

[@jazwhoaskedforthis]

DRAG HER GIRL

[@victoriawillingham5791]

Jordan's impression of Mrs Midwest's voice is the funniest thing I've heard in weeks 😂😂

[@deadnumber1]

"Letting their femininity be used against them" All I heard was victim blaming there, literary I had to pause and go back to listen to that. So be feminine ALL the time, but if people cross your boundaries then it's YOUR fault for then being TOO feminine and not knowing when to stop it. Me, my foul mouth, and my poop talking husband, do not need THAT kind of tenderness.

[@whatever7588]

That sentence is not victim blaming she said don’t let people be mean to you and don’t let people take your kindness for weakness, that’s not victim blaming

[@sagessedantan]

I had the same feeling about that section of her video

[@salem1281]

Having a relationship where I can't let loose, be goofy, share how I feel, and be "nurtured" back does not sound fun. My boyfriend has even said that he felt he couldn't be truly himself (he's really goofy and is a kid at heart) in past relationships because he felt judged. I think most people just want to be loved for who they are deep down. I find it to be very disturbing that she feels she can't just be herself to her husband. It seems very robotic, and that has to be so emotionally exhausting.

[@양지해-g6m]

As an autistic, i’m constantly tone corrected. It’s so exhausting. The receiver cannot look past the non musical sounding words. The Intent of my message is not worth considering just because i don’t sound tender or neurotypical enough.

[@JordanandMcKay]

Ableism at its finest 😠

[@AmandaPaige71]

You do you bc you're enough the way you are. And if someone doesn't get it then they're not worth the effort to begin with!! 🤗💗🤗

[@sydney.mp4]

i was just about to comment this and wanted to see if anyone else had picked up on it yet! it's so frustrating. yes, how something is received/perceived by others matters but you can't always say "intent doesn't matter" because it really, truly does when your perception of someone else's words is based off of things like tone that differ person to person - it just proves how quickly some people are willing to write off neurodivergent folk

[@Pamela-su1hh]

It’s interesting that you say this because while watching her I wondered if she was neuro diverse in some way and never received support or a diagnosis. It’s almost like she had to teach herself how to sound “acceptable” and felt she needed to share her tips.

[@Mike-sj9si]

I agree!! I wrote a comment on this too. Then when I work so hard to create a tone that I think fits the situation and people still apparently don't like the way I said the thing I'm just like screw it I'm gonna talk how I talk and if that costs me something then that sucks and at the same time maybe that thing was not worth it. When I'm not tone-correcting, people often tell me I "sound robotic" and I'm like yep. Get used to it.

[@radificationnation]

My mom is emotionally abusive. Even though my sister and I are approaching 30 and live on our own, we both still overthink because we’re so used to policing our language to avoid angering my mom.

[@DragonWrangler10]

She's 100% confused on why the birds don't perch on her when she's in the garden (most call it a yard, but garden is more feminine). See! I'm learning so quickly.

[@georgiamcenoy9431]

Jordan's impression of her asking her husband to take out the trash fucking SENT me, lmao I love you guys

[@rachel_s_g]

The tone police thing hits extra hard for me as an autistic person. My mum regularly tells me off for my tone of voice. I just sound miserable all the time, I'm not actively aware of it.

[@wooogie672]

sameeee. like allistics astound me😭 last night my mom snapped at me when i made an observation about a new food she bought because my “tone” was “disrespectful” 🥱🥱

[@msj5492]

Jordan kept mentioning she was worried about her husband and I would also be genuinely worried if I was actually close to her. Her husband is a cop and cops have BAD track records of domestic vlolence and whlte supr3macy.

[@JordanandMcKay]

I cannot confirm nor deny why Jordan had to shut me up at that part 💀

[@whatever7588]

That is extremely true

[@RatchetRozay]

Honesty, this is a GREAT tutorial on how to speak in a way to manipulate men with fragile egos

[@ViolAM3]

She is going for Michelle Duggar. What is that thing about cults? everyone changes their behaviour to be like robots?

[@melissajarrard5264]

I immediately got Michelle Duggar vibes from her also!

[@ViolAM3]

@@melissajarrard5264 LOL

[@Ameliamaemay1990]

Ohhh myyy God I hear it now too!! It's a baby Mrs. Duggar 💀💀💀☠️☠️☠️

[@Kimboscrub]

THANK YOUUUU!!!! I made the exact same comment!!!

[@betsysmith9176]

From Europe here. She reminds me of every experience flying to the states having that overly friendly barista call you cupcake, and comment on how brave you must be to have short hair and how she could never do that and can't imagine how hard growing it out again would be. Then I would reply with the fact that I have no intention to ever grow it out, and she would comment on my super sweet accent and ask me where I'm from. I'd reply that I flew in from Belgium and she would go on about how much she loves Germany and ask if Beglium is in the east or the west of Germany... Me resisting the urge to lunge across the counter the moment she called me cupcake, right eye twitching by the end of our very tender interaction.

[@rosemilk456]

On behalf of Americans I'm sorry lol

[@sisuguillam5109]

Everyone knows that Belgium is in the middle of Germany, right next to Wales.

[@kinndah2519]

And that's a bad thing? Why are most of you Europeans so mean to us when we just simply want to show interest in you and conversate?! I swear the majority of people including myself from many parts of the world always comments on how mean the majority of Europeans are! Yes we studied geography but we don't have to memorize every single bit of it especially when we haven't studied it in years. Can you make out a perfect map of the United States and the rest of the world? So someone forgot on which side a country is from the other among many, big deal. Please remove the stick from your asses😒

[@Monocultured01]

It's kind of weird seeing people in the comments here being all like "can't we respect that people have different views. She doesn't push hers onto others," despite there being evidence that she's a white supremacist or has leanings toward that ideology. I guess she's done a pretty good job hiding it behind videos about posture and housekeeping. And before anyone comes for me, this isn't because she talks about "traditional femininity". I don't give a crap how she expresses her womanhood or chooses to live her life. Fundie Fridays has a really good video showing the evidence pointing toward her being a supremacist.

[@DM-nw5lu]

Tolerance means not just tolerating harmless ideas, it's not tolerating the harmful ones that hurt other people. Tolerating the intolerant is not tolerant. That's how Hitler & Co. make it to the top. People letting the intolerant do what they want.

[@agees924]

Exactly. Like I don’t care if these people want to have their “pure bloodline” or whatever. They can live any way they want. The issue is that they don’t want other people doing these things and actively try to prevent other people from living differently.

[@zp1167]

Wtf...

[@stevesayers2471]

If she had different views in her past. Then that was THEN

[@perpetuallylate8091]

Who's gonna tell her that Shakespeare loved dirty jokes? 👀😂😂

[@karas3101]

"My husband is a police officer"... McKay, I get you man. But kudos to Jordan for the shhh. My partner would have given me the wide eyed stare.

[@JordanandMcKay]

I held my tongue 😬

[@karas3101]

I would have bit my tongue off by now. Damn!

[@AmandaPaige71]

Her continuous harping on how women should watch their tone and language etc reminds me of the "keep sweet" mantra from the Mormons and the "joyfully available" mantra from the Fundies that's pushed onto girls from the day they're born...ugh. What is her religious affiliation do you know? Or does she just claim the generic "conservative, traditional Christian?"

[@hannahkurtz16]

can y’all do a review for the book “and the bride wore white”? my christian school made us read it in jr. high. i remember it being super “purity culture” ish.

[@JordanandMcKay]

It just sounds bad… maybe lol

[@peterlosingwendy7]

Never thought I'd be in Satan's Ponzi scheme, but here I am- happy and thriving.

[@JordanandMcKay]

Same, the payouts seem great, too. Just as good as the “blessings” we got when we were Mormon, if not better.

[@bjjjb3056]

Right?! My true God fearing grandmother would be so proud though. She always talked her last days that she was scared for us and the changes she was seeing in church. Last time I walked out of that church was behind her casket. Never went back.

[@TheAnneBonney]

Same 👍

[@witchbitus386]

Is she really using gentle parenting skills on her husband? Lol

[@katiemckee3334]

I wish I had a pocket sized Jordan I can carry around every day and help me set and stick to my boundaries (and not feel guilty about doing it). 😅

[@JordanandMcKay]

omg that is so sweet!!

[@britnicox3929]

It just feels inherently contradictory that women are both naturally better at communicating and being feminine but also need to be taught how to speak in a feminine way…. also constantly adjusting your voice and body language to the sensitivities of others is exhausting

[@JordanandMcKay]

Stop! If you think about it, you’ll ruin her entire viewership!

[@mghtymffn]

Can I just say I love Jordan's laugh so much and the way she looks at Mckay when he says something funny, adorbs

[@amandawilliams5352]

"There is no war in Ba Singh Sei" - I appreciate this reference. So apt and... To use Jordan's favorite word...very appropriate. "You're not a guru because you're white..." - McKay literally killing it with the comebacks.

[@littlemisshappy2002]

"Sometimes the receiver needs to be kicked in the nuts" 🤣🤣🤣 YES! Assertiveness is NOT rudeness.

[@-MaryPoppins-]

As someone who knows how to speak to different people in different ways to make sure THEY feel comfortable due to my own abusive childhood, NONE of what she’s recommending is healthy. She may not realize it, but it’s still manipulating. If you have no way of holding a genuine conversation with someone, one where you do not force a certain persona out, you’re not ok. No one can keep that up for long. You’re gonna snap, and it’s not gonna be cute 😬

[@jazwhoaskedforthis]

Learning how to manage other people’s emotional states to survive due to childhood abuse gang rise up.

[@courtneylyons8404]

OMG, when you said you go to a wal-mart 5 miles down the road to poop I thought hmm that explains why all these trad wife types love trips to Target so much.

[@JordanandMcKay]

IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE.

[@Fiona-68]

It also explains why it seems like they have a fork up their ass.

[@h0rriphic]

I think everyone leaned away from their screen when Mrs. Midwest tried to give us that “digital hug”.

[@zappa-happy]

She should’ve been Crowned Miss. Umbridge !! Or move to Vegas 2 become an Umbridge - impersonator !!🤣🤣

[@Stella-uk4je]

"Learn to say no" is a great message, but the way she discusses it is terrible. Notice all the victim blaming there? Women "let their femininity be used against them." Its the victims fault to her, not the person taking advantage of them. We should all learn to say no and set boundaries, but we also need to teach/learn not to take advantage of people.

[@Mike-sj9si]

Such a good point!! As well as understanding when someone's just a jerk who constantly pushes everyone's boundaries and therefore just isn't worth spending much time, if any time with. Sometimes you say no and then you say no again and they still don't get it and that's not on you or your femininity or anything. I totally understand though if the situation's complicated and hard to read and if maybe you have to spend a lot of time with the person.

[@Mike-sj9si]

This is very interesting. Thanks for reacting to this video. As a woman on the autism spectrum this has been a whole ordeal for me. I don't feel very upset when people "don't like me," in fact I would hardly notice what people think of me if I hadn't been taught ways to notice. With that said I am trying to survive in a world where I'm a minority so it kinda makes sense that I'm trying to figure out how to, you know, vibe with the neurotypicals. I've found that when I ask for things in the way that I would ask for them (example: *fairly toneless voice* "Can you take out the trash?") I'm more often "snapped at," which is uncomfortable even though I don't lose sleep over it, and I think it's a sign that I'm falling out of social favor? Then when I use the "nice" approach, like: *higher, softer voice* "When you get a chance, will you please take out the trash?" I'm more often laughed at and "made fun of" as "too sweet" and "not tough," which doesn't seem to reflect who I am on the inside and it also seems like a socially unfavorable thing? I've found that acting like a "bro" by lowering my voice and saying something like, "Hey, when you get a sec could you take out that trash?" typically works best in a lot of situations, except super professional situations where it seems like my normal way of speaking tends to work better, and except when I'm talking to "customers" where my normal way of speaking + some extra "polite" words like "please," "thank you," "sir," and "ma'am" seem to work but not always, sometimes the customer complains anyway and apparently that's just "how it is" and I need to have a "thick skin" (as though I care about what a stranger thinks of me. I'm mainly just worried about keeping my job in a world where I struggle to read people). I've thought about and researched why people react to me the way they do and I think it might have something to do with being a woman, and a small woman at that. Let me present you with a hypothetical situation: If Dwayne The Rock Johnson (who I love, by the way, I think he's a very talented, hard-working, and respectable guy) simply asks you to take out the trash, do you do it or do you snap at him? If Dwayne Johnson asks you nicely to take out the trash, do you do it or do you laugh and make fun of him for "being too sweet, like a boring Disney Princess who can never hold her own in any situation?" If Dwayne Johnson curses at you and yells at you to take out the trash (which I don't think he'd typically do because he seems like a respectful person) do you criticize him for being a "jerk" or do you pick up that trash and throw it outside right away? But since I'm not The Rock, I'm clearly a petite woman, maybe people (especially neurotypical people) are more inclined to criticize what I say and how I say it? Maybe they're more judgemental of me and more comfortable expressing that judgement because they're not naturally afraid of me? Just a thought. Overall as I get older I'm just speaking more and more in the way that's true to me and letting whatever happens happen. I haven't lost my job yet and at the end of the day I don't think I'm technically being "mean" or disrespectful.

[@leahtheanimationfan40]

I am also on the autism spectrum and I totally understand this. I was very quiet in social situations in my younger years because I didn't understand it yet. I've learned to be a real life actress and morph into situations to come across as nicely as possible. As an adult, I've pretty much learned to come across as "normal" to the point where most people don't know I'm autistic, but sometimes I still say the wrong thing or share too much and it makes people uncomfortable... 😕 I'm a petite but very tall woman but still occasionally have people talk to me like I'm a child

[@Teajay21]

Yeah I think that there's a "tone" thing that we just don't get? I do have a Work Voice & Scripts for clients but outside of that I have no idea how to react like does someone actually want to know how I am? How do I know? Am I asking this in a normal way? I think actually being perceived as a woman and younger than I am actually makes it easier for me because I come across as a bit weird & but mostly cheerful & harmless. I think if I was The Rock I'd make people more uncomfortable & defensive when I come across the wrong way. On the topic of asking people to do things one thing I HATE is when people say "would you like to do-" would you mind doing" x thing that's a chore or task because obviously no I dont want to & often I do mind? Like if they just asked me to do it, I'd do it no problem but when it's phrased like that it really annoys me because its like they get to pretend I'm agreeing that I don't mind or that I want to do something ugh.

[@bestjuliawest]

@@Teajay21Getting older really is a wonderful thing. I used to put on the performative niceties when people asked how I am… now it’s “Fine, you?” if it’s small talk with a stranger, or if it’s a friend and I’m in a particular mood, sometimes I just won’t answer 😂 “How are you?” became such a loaded question as you were saying, but now it’s easier to to admit I don’t often like to think about how I’m doing tbh hahah

[@jordanbrown5945]

"My husband is a police officer..." Jordan: .... "don't." HAHAH I love ya'll.

[@kayl1922]

Spicy Jordan is the best... laughing so hard lol

[@chelsealotocki917]

Jordan: "...don't." You're my spirit animal 😂 That was hilarious

[@SceneSkeloton]

Jordan, please never change "patreons" to "patrons." I love it

[@lindaann5860]

Mrs. Midwest graduated with Honors from the Michelle Duggar School of Sanguine Speech.

[@melissawilliamson8871]

Ah yes. Michelle Duggar who raised an abusive pedophile son.

[@kaylahsmith6864]

"Pronunciate" I am crying 🤣

[@ToEKnee213]

LOL! Just got to the bedroom comment, and almost spit out my tea I love this side of Jordan lol

[@meghanworkman6449]

She has that same babyish, mildly-drugged sound to her voice that Michelle Duggar has.

[@Starving_Phoenix]

Honestly, I'm pretty sure my foul mouth is one of my most attractive features and my husband agrees haha.

[@Kimboscrub]

Agreed!! 👏👏👏👏

[@ashleelynn7094]

Same

[@gamere105ek2]

Starving Phoenix Same! 🤣 Pretty sure my personality isn’t the most attractive, but I like to think my foul mouth is a highlight!

[@RomaBeautyLily]

To quote my own husband “I love a pretty girl with a dirty mouth” 😆🥺😆💕

[@chelseac4553]

I must say, I really REALLY appreciate the long-form videos that don't rely on lot's of cuts and edits. Just subscribed last week and I am liking what I see :)

[@JordanandMcKay]

Lots of jump cuts kind of take the genuineness out of things. I try to keep the jump cuts reserved for the book ends of the video when we are setting things up and talking about announcements and things.

[@chelseac4553]

@@JordanandMcKay Yeah it is refreshing to see that!

[@AmandaPaige71]

I can't watch these type videos without the snark commentary sooo tysm for taking one for the team bringing us this content!!! 😂😂😂 Edit to add that Nikki Philippi is trying to make a comeback on her channel last week. She turned off comments of course....

[@JordanandMcKay]

Of course! Comments turned off means you’ve lost. Maybe find a new hobby, friend.

[@AmandaPaige71]

@@JordanandMcKay ABSOLUTELY and let it have nothing to do with animals or adoption!!!!

[@mcpheefan21]

The way she's demonstrating how to police your tone reminds me of how I talk around my mother. Any of my siblings will tell you that she can be quite abrasive, unapproachable, and sometimes brash in her words and her reaction to what you say even if it's not said in a harsh way. I truly believe it's kinda conditioned me to speak the way she's recommending, not only when talking to her, but also when talking to coworkers, bosses and sometimes strangers. I even have a hard time sometimes when I'm trying to express an opinion to my boyfriend and he can tell. He's been trying to help me break out of that though. Also, do you guys think Mrs. Midwest believes that it's also not gentleman-like to use vulgar language? Surprisingly enough, I actually did hear that growing up.

[@kinndah2519]

How bitter are these 2 ppl?! Mrs. Midwest wants to be feminine & well spoken & you don't, THAT'S FINE. She also celebrates her European heritage just like we celebrate our Mid Eastern heritage, Asians, & Africans celebrate theirs, etc. There are things much worse in this world to demonize rather than a SAHM in the rural midwest who's doing nothing but loving the ppl around her.

[@JordanandMcKay]

Idk she kind of idealizes the kind of people that hated the people around them that were different and attempted to exterminate them. Nothing praiseworthy there.

[@kinndah2519]

@@JordanandMcKay I can't understand why she'd idoloze ppl who have hate in their hearts, if she's really like that I doubt she'd even bother reaching out to wide audiences & addressing them. Caitlin has had posts describing how she came from a manipulative family that disowned her, and made videos talking about love being all accepting not cruel like her family. I think she simply supports those channels who want to preserve the European culture and ethnic origins since they're becoming more and more of a minority in this world. Lots of Caucasian ppl are even being demonized more than normal these days. Just like how we're spreading ethnic/racial sensitivity to other races, we should to EVERY race. I feel that's why she's supporting the preserving of it only. Many ppl wish to preserve their ethnicity & it's fine. All ethnicities have their beauty. That doesn't mean we think it's superior to others. However, if she is lying about being supportive of all women in every race/ethnic origin...then it'll catch up to her. I also would have zero idea why she'd be following Christianity, which is an eastern religion from my part of the world if that's the case. Or why she's even living in the United States rather than moving to Europe. She's proud to be Dutch, said her grandmother spoke Dutch, & wants to carry on the traditions. So if Caitlin's views are extreme like you and others claim...she can move herself to the Netherlands with her now two sons and husband.

[@issecret1]

As a European (not the kind Americans would celebrate), that's fucking weird. How does one even celebrate their 'European" heritage?

[@kinndah2519]

@@issecret1 same way us middle easterners celebrate our heritage. Same way people from the continent of Africa celebrate their heritage, same as people from the Far East Asian continents celebrate their heritage. Same way that people from Hispanic regions in South and Central America celebrate their heritage. Same way different Native American tribes from the North American continent celebrate their heritage.

[@JordanandMcKay]

@@issecret1 usually by burning crosses

[@rhi.annonF]

Jordan feeling “spicy” is officially what I aspire to be!!! I enjoy this wayyyy too much

[@No-jz3bp]

The way she describes communication sounds like some kind of gilded trauma response

[@crazymema23]

Her information about stranger danger is so old it makes me wonder how new her contemporaries are to the world outside of their closed circle(minds), and on internet.

[@Wulfbloode]

I grew up in a group of ppl with this mentality... Made me feel like I had to be a dumb doormat to be a worthy mate or to even be friends with the other girls and their Bibles. Got myself an athiest boyfriend (now husband) instead XD He likes my brain and better believe I'm proud I have a woman body too

[@Wulfbloode]

It was actually the women who required/perpetuated this behaviour, not the men.

[@wendymccoy1093]

Everytime I hear flower in that terminology I think of Now And Then where of the one of girls say "You know, planting the seed and watering the flower..."

[@Forgetyouuuuu]

You guys are my favorite!!! I’m so gonna use “hello 1950? Shut the fuck up” 🤣🤣🤣🤣 you are both so individually awesome and together you have incredible banter with each other 👍🏼👍🏼 keep up the awesome work guys 🥰🥰🥰

[@JordanandMcKay]

Thank you!!

[@rachelh5467]

“Welcome back to satans Ponzi scheme!” I’m dead lolz

[@jilliansmaniotto2326]

what on EARTH is going on with mrs midwest’s blush? BLEND, HONEY. BLEND.

[@leftisthomemaker]

There are so many respectable ways to criticize her. There’s no need to mock her appearance. That’s something she would do, I assume you don’t want to be that same kind of person.

[@jilliansmaniotto2326]

@@leftisthomemaker good lord the condescension. critiquing her makeup skills is not mocking her appearance. particularly since she holds herself out as an expert on the subject, with the numerous videos on her channel purporting to teach people about beauty/makeup/skincare/fashion. critiquing her makeup technique, then, is entirely valid.

[@123cmarie]

I hate to comment on appearance, but the blush is so over the top that I came to comment on it. It's beyond bad makeup technique; it's like it's purpose is to make her look like a doll.

[@jacquelinelewis2110]

“The 1950’s called: shut the fuck up!” 😂 Love when Jordan is having an extra spicey day 😂😂😂

[@G625-s1c]

wait so why do i need to nurture people who i am not a legal or contractual caretaker for??? edit: oh wait, i forgot. trad wives think that marriage means that the wife is now a caretaker for the husband. [plenty of disabled couples caretake for each other but that’s not what i’m talking about because that’s an agreement between people communicating about their needs, not a patriarchal construct that makes wives take care of their husbands in ways that they can do for themselves]

[@YourFavoriteSociopath]

I honestly love y'all's channel. Y'all have the PERFECT binge videos. I get super into my programming work and I can go through 13-15 hours without realizing it, and y'all really make it fly by!

[@taylorellison2719]

Is anyone going to mention that “Do not enable abusers” is victim-blaming. Anyone in a situation that is abusive, you are not at fault, you are not enabling them and you are not alone. This lady is privileged and clueless to that privilege.

[@clan_fraser19]

Yes. I was thinking the exact same thing when she said that. Her indirect victim-blaming is so toxic.

[@whatever7588]

I don’t think that sentence there is victim blaming, people are in abusive relationships because they allow it and put up with it, that sentence would be different if it was about abusive parents which you actually can’t do anything about

[@CorduroyCastle]

All i can think when i hear her voice is "thank u michelle"

[@edenwinter9055]

"squirrels in the back yard" MUST be euphemism for something

[@angelamaryquitecontrary4609]

Maybe they're small beavers.

[@sezybabe100]

Love this!!! Comedy gold! Does she even hear herself? Oh wait, no probably not as she speaks in whispers! 🤣

[@LindsayNoel101]

The idea that you have to word things differently like the "What would you think if we move in 5 years?" scenario is a deeply rooted religious dynamic. The idea is thta everything has to be the man's idea so if the woman words it as something that's his idea the conversation will be 'easier'. I remember being taught this when i was younger, both directly and indirectly. When the man makes all the decision you do have to walk on eggshells

[@jazwhoaskedforthis]

Dude yes. Having to phrase things so delicately and being so calculated, just to step around someone’s ego or temper. It’s bonkers. You also wouldn’t need to try to manipulate the person whilst walking on eggshells if you were just in an equal partnership where your desire to move was just as valid and worth considering as the man’s possible feelings about moving. Like ???

[@trixjoyce]

I think my partner has a lot of more interesting stuff to listen to me rambling about^^ they love listening to me talking about my new upcoming music, my next creative filming project, or the struggles of drawing portraits despite having a diploma in illustration... You know those things that make my personality! I love to listen to my partner as well, when they talk about learning to play the guitar, their obsession with their new video game, or whatever makes their personality interesting. Don't my intention to be rude, but Mrs Midwest seems so boring (and quite honestly her husband seems boring as well...). Just like the other fundies. They are all the same?!

[@greenjean]

The sass and joking/commentary is on a whole new level in this video. I’m living for it 😂👏🏻

[@Teajay21]

Mrs M: "Women are good communicators" Ah, so they should make great Journalists, News Anchors, politicians, ambassadors, spokespeople, teachers, counselors & advocates, right? Mrs. MW: "Because we're biologically made to be caregivers in the home." Never mind then...

[@katy4523]

If I remember correctly, my friend who was reading on cults talked about how you indoctrinate someone. Repeating the same/similar phrases, using a calming voice, and appearing non-threatening,l are all good ways to manipulate an audience

[@katieh1752]

"If I got to shower that was a good day" gosh. I feel that in my soul.

[@JordanandMcKay]

parent life amiright lol

[@tortellinidoodle]

I've had a couple of therapists that spoke exactly like her and I just wanted to throw myself into a brick wall because it was so damn condescending

[@whatever7588]

Same !!! That’s one of the reasons why me and my first therapist just didn’t work out and infact made it even harder for me to open up

[@kinndah2519]

So someone speaking to you in a kind diplomatic way is triggering & strange to you? Sounds like trauma.

[@tortellinidoodle]

@@kinndah2519 'Kind' is the key word here. The therapists that I'm referring to were anything but kind.

[@tortellinidoodle]

@@kinndah2519 Also were exactly did I say it was strange? I don't think it's strange. It's very common. I do however expect some sort of ability to adapt from a therapist, especially when I make very clear how I prefer to be spoken to. These people rarely communicated with me directly even though I'm very much capable to understand what they have to say. There's no kindness in being condescending. Especially because I do have trauma. What a weird thing to say.

[@kinndah2519]

@@tortellinidoodle I understand what you're saying. However what I'm understanding from you is that someone spoke to you the way Mrs Midwest speaks to her audience. So I'm of course going to apply that to how your therapist is speaking to you. I understood from you that you think Mrs Midwest's eloquency of speaking is offensive to you. I also have a therapist, I don't pay attention to how she speaks to me rather than what she says to me. I'm rather soft-spoken myself and I don't like to use harsh words. That doesn't mean that everyone that speaks to me needs to reflect my attitude or else they're condescending. Regardless, I'm sorry that was your experience and I hope you find a therapist that can bring you peace & security. I wish that for everyone actually. The world would be a much safer and happier place if everyone found the perfect therapist for them.

[@communistsharks6889]

Damn this was surprisingly triggering for me. It’s been helpful, bc it’s pointed out just how much I police my tone and such bc abusive childhood, but I can remember my dad saying the same bullshit to me. It’s all my fault he yelled and screamed and broke down doors bc my tone of voice was off.

[@chrissym4130]

The way she says you should ask someone to take out the trash is the way codependents and those that have been abused ask for anything ugh

[@whitalleys5893]

“Speak like a Disney Princess who has had a lobotomy.”

[@Mrs90417]

So I was pregnant with my first and we were considering having me stay home and work only part time overnights after 6 weeks postpartum. Well at almost exactly 6 weeks the pandemic hit, so we decided to take the financial hit and have me be a SAHM. I found her videos via her homemaking content but then it suggested her collab with yogioabs and I got suggested other similar content. It's a super weird rabbit holes to go down and her fluff, cottage core vibe, etc all seem innocent and easy enough to put on in the background but oh boy, I gave myself a rude awakening when I realized what was happening after that brain fog lifted a bit! Sorry to say, I was one of those 400,000 views 🙃 But honestly I called it a rabbit holes it's more of a wormhole to get sucked into and I feel those who are Christian and center politically could easily get sucked down this red pill trail to never see the light again. I'm lucky! Ps Mrs Midwest seemed like a wonderful dog mom and is hopefully appalled by Nikki

[@alejajm1666]

sadly I don't even find her to be good at homemaking. her cooking is lazy at best and she doesn't seem to do anything effectively

[@Teajay21]

Yeah I've come across some real deep fundie content looking for cottagecore content on pinterest & there's a white supremacy crossover there too. It sucks.

[@sisuguillam5109]

I am a bit confused.... She thinks women are born to communicate, and men are not women, so therefore men do not communicate, therefore women communicate with women (and children) only.... and do what with men? I am at 17:42 and already so lost. Oh, wait... is this heading were I think it is heading? That men respond to tone more than content... as animals would? And that is why speaking femininly is so important because men have to be coaxed like you would an animal? Say it aint so.

[@Allison_Leigh]

Had to take a break at the halfway point and come back. This narrative that we need to be nurturing and kind to not trigger others negative emotional responses is basically part of my trauma conditioning from abuse. You hold yourself responsible for the actions of those around you and it's incredibly toxic/heavy weight to bare. I don't recommend practicing this. Sure you want to treat people with kindness and respect, but their reaction is theirs to own. I've been blamed so many times for garbage that was done to me. It's gaslighting and incredibly disorienting. I hope she didn't learn these behaviors in ways similar to how I did. I'm not going to assume one way or the other. But it's a slippery slope and I don't suggest conditioning yourself mentally this way at all for that reason.

[@noone-jw7nd]

The fact she's a white nationalist and her husband likely is too and is a cop is deeply troubling.

[@JordanandMcKay]

“Some of those that work forces…” or whatever Rage Against the Machine said.

[@DM-nw5lu]

I recommend Fundie Friday's video on her. Mrs Midwest's husband had posted very troubling stuff before.