Real-Life Marriage Advice

If you could time travel, what advice would you give yourself on your wedding day? #marriedlife #weddingday #realtalk
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About the Holderness Family
The Holderness Family creates original music, parodies, and Vlogs for KZbin to poke fun of themselves and celebrate the absurdity in circumstances most families face in their day to day life. They published "Christmas Jammies" in December 2013 and life hasn't been the same. Since then, their popular parodies, "All About That Baste", "Baby Got Class," and original music "Snow Day" have received national news coverage. Penn, the Dad, took a chance and left his job as a news anchor to join his wife Kim, the Mom, at their video production and digital marketing company, Greenroom Communications, LLC. Lola and Penn Charles are always happy, respectful and eat all of their vegetables (that last sentence is a lie). Penn, Kim, Lola, and Penn Charles publish Vlogs and other nonsense to this channel as often as they can while remaining sane. Our viewers have become our family and we try our best to respond to comments.

[@marteenabentley7548]

Dear pre-married self: There are lots of different ways to do things, your way isn't necessarily the "right" way. Also let your husband help you and let go of being in control all the time.

[@spklyunicorn]

Yes Yessity Yes Yes!!!

[@respectfullymama]

Did you figure out HOW to do that? :P

[@wa4aos]

I could say, "be reasonable, do it MY way." Then I'd be WRONG but that doesn't prevent me from thinking it....LOL

[@katienutt3576]

Marteena Bentley this!!!

[@LukenUSee]

Truer words have never been spoken!

[@juliepark2709]

Be a good forgetter! (Advice from friends married 75 years!!!!) In other words don't hold on to stuff Forgive!

[@highlightning6693]

I really like that one, Julie. :) That's good stuff.

[@sylviag3576]

Good advice for everyone

[@mvannorden02]

Love this. Thank you for the advice. Married 10 years and together 14 here. This advice is priceless.

[@LukenUSee]

Great advice! Agreed

[@mychevysparkevdidntcatchfi1489]

Yup, forgive is the secret sauce to lasting marriage. Unfortunately, women don't tend to forgive as 75% of divorces initiated by women, 90% initiated by women with college degrees, almost 100% of non-marital relationship breakups initiated by women. It boils down to finding a woman who can forgive.

[@jgrant4649]

I read this little poem just before I was married and I've never forgoten it. It has served me well for 30 years... "To keep a marriage brimming within the loving cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up!"

[@nkellegher1938]

THIS IS AN UNDERATED COMMENT!!! It deserves more likes! Also, I’m here before this blows up!

[@cynthiaholland13]

Oh my goodness so good! Now that I'm 23 years in Im going to start this lol

[@wa4aos]

At least once a day, Kiss her and then quickly ask, "What did I just do" and before she answers, exclaim, "I JUST KISSED A PRETTY GIRL !!" Been married 38.5 years and she's still and will always be my PRETTY GIRL !!! Hug and Kiss her frequently; it never gets old !!

[@britoronto6628]

Repeat after me. “honey, you might be right”. Repeat. Solves most things.

[@ADDAuntDawnDisorder]

I LOVE THIS! Great husband:) 👍👍

[@lorag4664]

What wonderful advice. For the guys and the gals!!

[@teresaleporati7574]

You, are a very smart man. Sweet too!

[@lizzdoe2821]

😭😭😭😭. Can you teach a class to other guys??? 😍😍😍

[@cynthiafrancis4197]

Don't ignore/slap away all his love nuzzles. He really, really, really needs physical touch. (and you really really really need him to want that from only you)

[@shellyray2416]

Make sure you still do date nights after the kids are born.

[@jfletc3000]

I lost my wife 5 yrs ago after almost 25 yrs together My advice would be always treasure your husband or wife as if today is the last day you see them. I wish i could see my wife again and treasure her more I miss her so much

[@handydandycrafts]

💕💗💕

[@naowright9308]

Genuine.

[@jesusistheway83]

Crying over here NBD, I love my husband so much. 😭😍❤ praying for you

[@JL-be2sr]

I’m so sorry. I try to remember this especially now. I do tell my husband I would want him to keep being happy so please don’t forget that your wife would want you to be happy.

[@yourgirlshani]

Praying a healed heart

[@dalemoore1308]

I became a widow at 58. He was 57. Never ever take each other for granted because you don’t know what tomorrow holds.

[@carlagustka325]

I'm so sorry.

[@Dragonsmom0910]

Present me to pre-married self. He will develop PTSD from his time in the military. It will be extremely hard, but the good times will out weight the bad. Be patient he really is trying.

[@beejoy6153]

Awe...PTSD is no joke. Great attitude though...keep the fun in the marriage, even during the hard times. My hubby and I have been married for 26 years and I have struggled with my own PTSD. He's been my rock... Many blessings going your way. Cheers!

[@taylorpitman6838]

God bless. Amazing love to you all

[@gwillis01]

the reason why the marriage vows include vows to be loyal in sickness and in health, for better or for worse is that lots can change through the decades of married life. Congratulations on slogging through the mental mud and slime of PTSD. Keep trying your best to improve your mental health.

[@BananaGrace]

Wow. Bless you for saying this.. as someone who battles with PTSD... it’s definitely interfered with my relationships.. not married yet. And praying for more healing and a gracious man when that time does happen.

[@cynthiaholland13]

Praying for you guys! You're so loving

[@spklyunicorn]

Respect. No yelling. No name calling. No going thru their email, browser, or phone. If trust is an issue, talk about it. Married almost 30 yrs. And I love my hubby to pieces ( other times I wish he were in pieces!)

[@magicofshootingstar5825]

I have always find this kind of thinking funny. My husband and me have all the passwords for each others computers and phones et cetera. We can use them on will because we trust each others. I wouldn't want to be with somebody who would have that big secrets that wouldn't be ok with me using their computer or something. I don't mean like I would read his messages but I know I would be allowed if I wanted.

[@zen_mindset1]

I never would go through a phone

[@mariekam738]

Ha ha ha😀

[@cindybills677]

Have the cheapest wedding you can and bank the money you would have spent on the wedding to use to pay a third shift nanny the first 3 or 4 months after your babies are born!!! When momma can get her sleep its a real game changer!

[@IIDASHII]

This x 1 million.

[@teresahowick5197]

Where were you 15 years ago lol! Great advice

[@LukenUSee]

True for daddies too! Sleep and bit of downtime are critical.

[@debbiekaren7058]

That’s f-ing GENIUS!!

[@handydandycrafts]

Even if you don't use the money for a nanny, anything you do use the money for will be more valuable than an expensive wedding. Even if it goes into the memories of an awesome honeymoon, it is better spent than the pomp of a wedding that your head will be spinning so much, you won't remember half of it anyway. Shoot, save it for a decent mattress!

[@russianseamonster]

When other people complain about their husbands, just smile and nod. Don't join in with the bashing, don't talk about how much better your husband is, just smile and nod. And then try to change the subject if you can.

[@jansmith3613]

I've been happily married for 40 yrs now and the best advice I could give my pre-wedded self would be to; 1. Don't expect him to read your mind. 2. Understand that the same words don't mean the same thing to both of you so define your terms. and 3. Don't let resentments build up but make sure they are real problems and not minor annoyances. Annoyances are part of all human interaction and can usually be dealt with if you discuss it with humility.

[@teresahowick5197]

Jan Smith I love this.

[@ck337]

Jan Smith this is the BEST advice!!! ❤️👌 And CONGRATS on 40 years!!!! That’s awesome!! 🎉

[@SarahLizDoan]

Jan Smith wonderful advice! Sounds excellent and real. Thank you and congratulations on 40 years of marriage, that’s outstanding!

[@Michelle-wo1fm]

Very wise and practical advice...unfortunately it takes 2 to tango so if both of you don't follow this advice, that makes marriage harder

[@97JoMiller]

The last one is the most important to me and wish my wife would learn that one

[@stephendelano2499]

Treasure her. Tell her she's beautiful at least once day. Even when she's moody look through it to see the most beautiful soul you'll ever have the honor of knowing

[@beejoy6153]

💚💚💚

[@DFDX1001]

Yesss, see self-evident. Marriage is founded on lies. Lies to yourself and your spouse and your friends and community. No reality. Makes lots of sense.

[@sparklemotion8377]

Sometimes people treasure the wrong people...

[@davidmussay5844]

Always put her first! Look at her as if it was the first day you met! 30 Years strong this month!

[@elaine1034]

My advice: don't let your kids play you against your mate. Always ask "What did your mother/father say about that? Come to an agreement with your mate and present a united front.

[@agniesiag]

That is wise

[@ozok17]

...and then check afterwards with each other, in case the kids did some spin-doctoring...

[@johntabler349]

Video was funny but the comments are thoroughly touching

[@mollytheewok]

I would tell myself "assume positive intent". 💖 Also focus on all the good in your spouse and as much as possible, ignore little annoyances that come from differences.

[@FormatException]

I don't know that I would tell myself anything. Married 20+ years and I love where we've ended up now. I wouldn't want to influence that.

[@kathyboly19]

Our 34th Anniversary is tomorrow and I say: focus on the good qualities, overlook the mildly annoying things, forgive the really annoying stuff (unless it's abusive), laugh together often, make time for fun, choose to love over being right, compliment ten times more than you "correct" or "enlighten" (don't be critical or judgemental). Remember that they put up with your crap too and if they were gone you would give almost anything to pick up their bath towel from the floor just one more time. (We pray together and for each other too, but not everyone believes as we do in our Lord Jesus, so I won't preach)

[@clarajaymorse3487]

Aw, congrats on your 35th this year! I hope you have a good one despite the world being a train wreck.

[@naowright9308]

It really helps to be married to someone who shares your same values.

[@EamonWill]

@@naowright9308 You know, you can have the same *values* without having the same *beliefs.* My husband is a Christian and I am an atheist and we have never had an argument or disagreement about our beliefs because our values are the same and because we believe in respecting and even encouraging each other's right to believe in any way that we want.

[@cynthiaholland13]

Oh honey, but Jesus is definitely what holds many of us together for decades for sure!

[@genesis.campos]

Awsome

[@AskAgainL8ter]

That marrying him was the best thing you've ever done, don't ever take him for granted.

[@SarahLizDoan]

Mrs Mom incredible! Very kind.

[@debbiekaren7058]

There wouldn’t be a 50% divorce rate if there was a 60% called-off-engagement rate. Just sayin. Even though you’ve been gaslighted and trained to ignore your intuition, now’s a great time to start trusting your own better judgment.

[@juliehunt9665]

Wow, finally, "judgment" spelled correctly -- no 'e' after the 'g'!

[@clarajaymorse3487]

@@juliehunt9665 Ah, yes. Nothing is better then correctly spelled words! (I'm not mocking you, I agree wholeheartedly)

[@EamonWill]

Intuition is very important!

[@lorrilewis2178]

The divorce rate isn't really 50% no matter how many times you hear it.

[@kerynl.sanchez9891]

@@lorrilewis2178 so, what is the real number?

[@Gigi714]

Before you react, stop, take a deep breath, think about what is behind your reaction to what he/she just said/did/didn't do and choose your battles. Most are not worth the fight. Never turn down the chance to renew your vows.

[@teresahowick5197]

Sandra Wheeler yes!

[@somerandomyoutubechannel5816]

Don't have a goal of never fighting; have a goal of ending fights faster. Oh, and never fall into the trap of arguing to be right. Arguments are meant to have your point heard, not convince your partner they are wrong. If they choose to love you (and love is a choice), they will do what's right by your marriage.

[@OhFrak]

Don't let your kids divide you on important decisions... Love you guys! Keep doing what you do!!

[@MikeHaddadLawnAddictions]

Sam Fu so true

[@jackieh1530]

We just celebrated 43 yrs. We barely argue anymore but I would tell myself to forget the small stuff and think about what you are saying to your spouse when it’s pertaining to the huge things. Love more💕

[@MyBtflChaos]

Make sure you make time for each other too. Sometimes we need to be spouses not just mom and dad. Make it a yearly tradition to take a 3 day getaway with each other. It’s like a much needed recharge.

[@CatherineCDMiller]

Talk. Learn to talk. Want to talk. Want to be married. Stay married. Make it better. Grow through it.

[@mjarrardjr]

1) People change over time, learn to grow with each other. 2) Give each-other space to do things on your own.

[@pamelajbennettwalton124]

When you have been married 44 years and the old hubster wants to run errands on the weekends, (basically being gone all day perusing the sales at Home Depot, Lowes, Sam's Club, and Costco, let him. A wife gets more done when the hubby is not underfoot. She just might even manage a nap before he returns with stuff we didn't need and have no space to store. But, hey, life is give and take. :-)

[@teresahowick5197]

Pamela J Bennett Walton lol I love this.

[@EamonWill]

OMG, this is my husband! And I am usually more productive without him, lol. 😂

[@kerynl.sanchez9891]

Cute, although, Home Depot to me is more fun than the mall!

[@katiekid1967]

What I have learned in the 25yrs that I have been married...1.) It's okay to admit that you are NOT always right! 2.) Nothing is EVER so bad that it couldn't be worse. 3.) People say that Marriage is 50/50%...it's NOT! It is 100/100% if BOTH Husband and Wife are NOT putting 100% into the marriage, it can and will most likely be disastrous! 4.) Don't sweat the small stuff. 5.) It's okay to agree to disagree and move on!

[@pattymcintyre6200]

Be aware of the fact that at anytime, way sooner than you thought, those little annoyances will be a memory and you’d do anything to have them back in your life.

[@SarahNicole0617]

I'd tell myself, just make him doctor appointments because he's not gonna do it himself. And to teach him how to fold clothes sooner because his mom always folded his clothes and if you don't want laundry baskets of crumpled clean clothes everywhere that's what you gotta do. Oh and to fly NOT drive to cape cod, just trust me. But mostly I'd tell myself you're gonna have 4 beautiful babies and go on adventures together and be very happy.

[@LouiseFranksArt]

You think you love him now, but you will love him more as the years go by. 20 years and counting.

[@ozok17]

i mis-read "and counting" at first as "and cuddling". :-)

[@Harmoniewheeler]

Been married 25 years, we got married at 19 yrs old! Loved it. My advice to myself would be: 1. Be nicer to his mom, it means a lot to him, it’s a good relationship to have with her, and she is such a good grandma. It’s not a competition. Plus she won’t always be there. And someday you will be the mother in law and they will call you the exact same name as your mother in law!!!!! Mrs. Wheeler, Grandma Wheeler! What? That’s his mom, not me! 2. no matter what he says, he meant it nice, he thinks he is being nice. 3. Thank him for what he does, feed his ego more often. He wants to feel like he takes care of you, let him.

[@khi8345]

Your grandkids totally need to call you Gramonie!

[@Harmoniewheeler]

K Hi , Thank you! we have been trying to work in Gigi, Grandma Harmonie is too hard and sort of formal, close friends and family call me Harm, but that’s weird for a lot of people, so grandma Harm doesn’t work. But I love Gramonie! Thanks, I’m gonna test that out. Oldest living grandchild is 16 months so we are getting close to a name:)

[@carollutz8253]

I just adore this/!! I would say: humor can help many tense situations. Show him a lot of grace, because you screw up a lot, too!

[@Xanxer]

Try to remember you were friends once who simply enjoyed each other's company when things were simple and there were no expectations of one another or pressures of being a married adult. Try to find time to have those moments again.

[@xtina1610]

Go out of you way to thank him for even tiny little things he does for you everyday . Your words are extremly powerful and can either build him up, "Thank you so much for doing that darling," or completely destroy him, "That was stupid of you. What were you thinking?" Be the first one.

[@diannamallar1155]

You are only going to have 18 years together. Hang on tight and cherish every moment. Make every minute worth it. Say I love you every chance you get. Take none of it granted. And when you have to face that moment, remember you are stronger than you can imagine.

[@lindag277]

Dianna Mallar wow, this hit me hard.

[@erinaa9486]

Aw 😔 so sorry for your loss

[@susanwerner9961]

So sorry Dianna, .I hope you find great happiness in your time apart.

[@ozok17]

;_; condolences.

[@shonacatto7798]

Laugh. A lot. With each other and with the children. Say sorry, apologise with sincerity and take time to think over each other’s opinions. Above all remember to embrace each other and tell them how grateful you are for them every day. The little things make a huge difference.

[@shannonj4415]

Don’t put a tv in the bedroom 🙄

[@kerynl.sanchez9891]

If possible, don’t have one!

[@angelicahowell8055]

Can I ask why? 😅

[@amandagrayson389]

I would say ‘You’re going to go through some very rough and difficult times. But you will get through it because you love each other. Remember that as long as you are together, you can make it.

[@intigniadickey2224]

Always communicate. You gotta talk things out; don't let them fester. Be very forgiving. Have lots of hugs.

[@buffalogirl3313]

Omg I love this. Just like my husband and me. We've been married 40 yrs. I would tell my younger self to cherish EVERY MOMENT. It goes so fast.

[@jewelleryaddict]

Buffalo Girl us too 40 and counting. Just was thinking minute ago we been in our “new” home 20 years and our old home 20 years and it went so fast!

[@mildredmarshall4460]

I could have avoided so many arguments if I just took care of it myself , instead I asked for his opinion.....LOL

[@ozok17]

well, it can be a bit of a calibration process. i have tended to "just do" some things too much, with a response that i did them "wrong", so maybe should have checked first, at least for "buy in". A relevant saying: "If you're the only one who had a hand in baking the cake, nobody else is going to eat your cake, even if it's the best cake in the world." otoh, sometimes i don't "just do" things enough. decision-making and figuring-out effort (and fatigue) is real, and is somewhere we can help each other.

[@WendyChaconMD]

Buy a KING size bed so you each have your own space after cuddling, and when a child occasionally joins you in the middle of the night! You are both amazingly talented! Keep it up! My kids and I watch your parody videos all the time!

[@handydandycrafts]

Better than that, put two queen beds together so you have tons of romping room and space for a kid or two. Lol!

[@MegF142857]

And separate blankets. We each have our own blanket & space.

[@dsolomon]

I’d make a sports analogy - “you guys are Steve Young and Jerry Rice. You’re both awesome but only when you’re working together as a team. The other team is your opponent and never each other. The more you get in sync, understand each other’s strengths and roles, and do your part, the more touchdowns you’ll score.”

[@hansshaffer3788]

Always express appreciation for each other.

[@TinaBojan]

I'd definitely tell our premarried selves to travel/vacation more before we had kids. That's all. The rest has been a dream. ❤

[@elenaz4718]

I love this💚 I would tell premarried self not to sweat the small stuff.

[@xraquelnicolex19]

My wedding is literally this saturday so that timing is amazing! 😂😂

[@cmdub97]

Congrats!

[@teresahowick5197]

Congrats!! Advice about the day: Just enjoy. Something (s) always goes wrong. Just accept that and enjoy yourself. That way you’ll have fun.

[@MyBtflChaos]

Congratulations!!!

[@MorrisFamAdventures]

congratulations!

[@chrissyweer4441]

Congrats! Have a great time!

[@michellebyrd979]

Forgive, forgive, and FORGIVE some more! Try to understand the lens through which your SPOUSE sees a situation, himself/herself, and life. 💝💝💝🙏🙏🙏 Such a cute video thanks for sharing!! 😆🤣

[@angelamartin2407]

Be honest about sex. Don't suppress your opinions share them in love even when different. Don't run away from conflict. Embrace it and come to a resolution that both can work with.

[@mlavier16]

Never go to sleep while angry with your spouse. I haven't slept in 23 years.

[@g.b.2095]

Wives: Don't smother your spouse! Sometimes he just needs to be quiet and alone. Husbands: Just listen to her without trying to" fix" it! Both: Don't become child centered!

[@handydandycrafts]

Husbands, don't smother your wife either. And never let anything, (especially your children) come between you, except maybe for hugs.

[@gwillis01]

I have heard several self help articles say to husbands "She does not want you to fix it right away. The first thing she wants you to say, well before you present a solution is the following golden sentence: "Yes I agree that the situation is frustrating and dismal. Yes it does suck."

[@agniesiag]

Good one

[@a1090132]

Dear pre-married self: If it won’t matter five years from now, let it go.

[@dougdraper4892]

Advice: none! All the fun (and pain) was figuring it all out as we've gone. And we continue to figure it out as we go.

[@elizabethmaycroft1736]

My advice would be that in the difficult times to keep your heart open and things will get better. God is bigger and He will provide!

[@lola1033]

"It's not about being right it's about solving/facing the issue together, as a team". I heard this from a married couple and can't get it out if my head.

[@Mary-momof8]

I wish we'd nurtured our marriage more. Had lots of kids and they became the priority. Went through hell multiple times with different children over 35 years together. I miss our younger selves. It was more fun then. ☹

[@jmlewis435]

You two are real life! Funny, spot on, and a very attractive couple. Thanks for the laughs!

[@mindyvanhorn3199]

So true, loved the video, put a smile on my face! Best marriage advice? Repeat after me, Im sorry, and forgiven

[@robinsonsomething]

Honestly? Find out more about C-Sections! The hospital never really prepped us for those. But marriage advice? Um... yes, socks on the floor are annoying and he will consistently leave his pajamas and underpants in the kitchen pretty much every morning, but you'll miss it when he's not around. Also, being a military spouse is HARD - go easy on yourselves - both of you. Granted, we figured this stuff out over the past 10 years, but I used to get real worked up about the clothes on the floor. Now I just roll my eyes and kiss him an extra time when he comes home :) he knows it's my code and just says 'oh, yeah, i got dressed in the kitchen again, didn't I? You know I'm never fully awake until I've had at least 2 cups of coffee.' I still don't understand why, but if it's my only complaint, I think we're doing ok.

[@theresaward3013]

From my first marriage - RUN!!! Do not do marry him. You are in love with the man I am married to now. He is amazing, makes you laugh everyday, and would move heaven and earth for you.

[@kristafalcon5851]

Marriage is hard. It requires so much work. Ups and downs happens, try to remember the good times when times are hard. Encourage your spouse, and most importantly tell them you’re proud of them.

[@shelleys6826]

Not being critical, but it makes me sad whenever I hear someone say this.

[@kristafalcon5851]

Shelley S why is that? All heathy relationships require a bit of growth which can be hard. It’s not always glamorous and people need to hear the good and the bad. I adore my husband, we are about to have our fifth child together. But marriage can be tough! But I wouldn’t change it for the world!

[@ozok17]

@@shelleys6826 some people come by the skills involved in maintaining a relationship long-term more easily and more readily than do others. thanks for pointing out that the comment saddens you, though. i wonder if i've saddened people around me by saying that sort of thing. i also wonder if there's something i'd rather say instead, in such circumstances, like when someone asks me how married life is going. i do find it hard, sometimes more than others.

[@suzannebindon3918]

Pray Sacrifice Don’t keep score Forgive

[@teresahowick5197]

Suzanne Bindon yes!! The don’t keep score especially. My hubby and I both do this. It’s no good.

[@eliharlan5355]

Absolutely. Not keeping score has been one of our marriage promises.

[@JeffFrmJoisey]

I'd tell my pre-married self - She loves to shop. So make sure you control the money!! Place a Hard Freeze on your credit. Or you'll be clueless and have no idea just how many credit cards are now in your name.

[@tomlaureys1734]

I love the outtakes line "I was trying to help!" Ha ha

[@lochness3224]

NEVER loose the ability to laugh , even if things do get a little crazy from time to time ..... also after a million years together you are STILL gonna have to un - ball the socks before you can wash them ...lol

[@nicolehunt4873]

Learn yours and your partners Myers Briggs types and study hard! This has been a total eye opener for us! Also, love languages.

[@karissahammond4587]

Try enneagram too!

[@ozok17]

note that these are useful as conversation *starters*, not as be-all-end-all answers to explain exactly how-and-why and how-to.

[@v.mollner6911]

If an argument is about to let loose, remember...you can be "right" or be "loved"...your choice!

[@v.mollner6911]

which is more important?

[@bikri08]

My first marriage: don't My second marriage: do it sooner

[@celianicoll7060]

Go see a financial planner then invest the inheritance wisely. Oh, and make him GO TO THE DOCTOR! (He died of cancer four months ago, I miss him!)

[@avivaceder5308]

I'm so sorry for your loss😢🌹❤️ Big Hug

[@Carolmaizy]

Im sorry!

[@JNMKlover]

Mine won't go to the doctor either. He has good health, thankfully. But I do know if he has anything serious it would be the worst fight.

[@clarajaymorse3487]

I'm so sorry. I can't imagine. I don't know what you're feeling, but I lost my uncle this year, and it was really painful. I'm praying for you

[@lunalie1449]

Dear Celia, i hope you are doing ok. Take care of yourself ☺

[@carolinewalsh323]

Let a lot of stuff go. Like when he mansplains something that you just taught him about two days ago.

[@thisistherealsarah]

I would tell myself that the relationship with his mom will get better. And that everything will be ok. Stop worrying so much about the small things.

[@vickibanks6538]

That you're gonna go through some super rough patches but it's all worth it because he never gives up on you. Also be prepared to play a lot of table top rpgs for some time. lol.

[@Andrea-xs4ny]

My advice to pre-married self is "Don't ignore all those red flags!" I know. It's depressing. It was awful and we didn't make it. Make sure you're marrying the right person. You guys are just too adorable and I have marriage envy.

[@Lorddanielrushton371]

My advice to myself, convince my wife to marry me sooner.

[@nlpolak]

This is so funny...I was thinking along these same lines not that long ago! We are coming up on our 16th wedding anniversary next month, and have been through a lot in our marriage. There are just sooooo many things I would have done differently had I known the outcome! Gripe about less, live more in the now, and be patient with myself and others stand out the most.

[@cindybailey465]

I would tell myself (18 years ago, what I just learned in the last 3 months) Be open minded in the bedroom and learn how to show love the way he understands it! I feel like I'm on my second honeymoon (except this time I know what to do! 😉) Give my love freely, enthusiastically and wow it's a win win!!!! ❤️

[@sherrikate7103]

When there are jobs to be done in the house he will suddenly develop some type of illness or injury. And on the heels of that, when he has said illness or injury, you will always be accused of not showing enough compassion 🙄😂

[@mizleslie1980]

Oh my God, my husband too!!

[@samwdavis]

Scared of being alone? Being joined with a crazy person is a thousand times worse. Run!!!

[@zen_mindset1]

👏👏👏

[@kerynl.sanchez9891]

Bravo!

[@bonniekarp3715]

Amen

[@ozok17]

goal: partner who's just crazy enough to somewhat understand me, but enough saner than i am in the important ways

[@ozok17]

(noting that mine is not a well-defined answer)

[@emiliac2644]

Please do a part 2

[@cmdub97]

I am not married.....YET, but I would tell my pre-significant other self to not give up on school. I had no idea just how much my education and getting a degree means to him. He paid for me to go back to college for two semesters and I messed it up, granted he understands why (I had pneumonia for 8 months), but I don't feel like I gave my all, sick or not.

[@sheem.2450]

Dear Pre Married Self - Focus on each other and your happiness. 😍

[@sharaguzzetta9504]

Get him ear protection when the kids are babies and he'll help more.

[@cocowilson8296]

I'd tell myself it is ok not to be perfect.

[@noahwilhelm9201]

“I was trying to help!” Said every married guy ever.

[@KristinBennett]

uh.,. We women say that too. At least I do! - 11yrs so far...

[@brandywiles3289]

I had some ideas, but I’m afraid my pre-married self would get mad at hearing the advice and choose not to follow it out of spite. 🙊

[@fivemile13]

Pick your battles. Don't back down if you know you're right, but talk about it so you all understand. Always talk to each other. And say "I Love You." Marriage is hard work. If you want it to last, be prepared to work for it.

[@chrisarat]

pre married self "DONT DO IT" sorry best I can do lol

[@helenobrien9064]

im with my husband 7yrs married april we were 21 yrs together before we married three children two step children three grand children one more next month with gods help stay safe holderness family from tralee co kerry in ireland xxxx

[@sassafrasandlemons1634]

Don't take it personally when he says things like "that's not the way my mom does it"

[@peggyharris7849]

Future me: He’s going to use all the dining room chairs as his closet and the only time you’ll see him at home NOT wearing boxers is when the doorbell rings.

[@cmdub97]

I don't deal with his stuff on the chairs, but the living room is his closet and our master bedroom that we are renovating is his tool shed until we finish building one. Long story made short, I can totally relate!

[@jackiem9460]

I'm not seeing the problem lol

[@sharonjackson9994]

This is SO true!!

[@barbie3139]

so sorry about the boxers!

[@TurnthePage]

Definitely the advice about him not being able to read your mind! 😄 And guys don’t really know how to multitask. My husband can usually only concentrate trade on one task while I’m juggling about 100.

[@mandieaaron8379]

I’m getting married in June ... this is awesome!

[@madinat3000]

Be Happy!

[@ozok17]

best wishes, for whatever you have ahead of you now!

[@LawofMoses]

26 years here and I am still figuring it out lol😊

[@courtneyandrews2319]

Oh my gosh..... soooooo much adivce I don't even know where to start! Haha! Loved this video so much!!

[@rebeccaprewett5014]

Postpone the wedding! Seriously!!!! Take your doctor’s advice and get well first... and not just physically but emotionally, mentally, and spiritually as well. Take time getting to know each other. There is no rush. Don’t let him talk you into impractical and ugly furniture you’ll be stuck with forever. Don’t pretend to like stuff you can’t stand. Be yourself. Be honest, no matter what. Have healthy boundaries. Don’t dump your old friends and don’t give up on your interests, hopes, and dreams. Make lots of room for beauty. Have date nights. Have nights out with friends. Don’t stop playing and laughing. Pray a lot. Don’t let your spark go out.

[@stevet835]

“He gets me.” Lol