4 Ways to Make Narcissists LOSE Their MINDS

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Want to learn more about how to make a narcissist lose their minds? Come join me on my free live webinar! www.rebeccazung.com/live

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

I will be there live to answer all your questions!

[@rashneedhanpal9517]

@@RebeccaZungEsq Thank you

[@genegene53]

Tortured them

[@jebidiahnewkedkracker1025]

You're a good looking gal Rebecca, but don't let THAT go to your good looking NON narcissist head. 😂😊😏 I have a hunch you may have been a tigress in the court as an attorney, but THAT is not necessarily a compliment---but feel free to take it as one.😂😊😏

[@dawnrose9150]

I agree totally! Great advice!!!

[@angelalegonidec1219]

The greatest revenge you can ever have is to move on and create an amazing life for yourself

[@rowan5335]

My neighbor's son was treated badly because they did not want him to succeed. I told him getting in trouble was what they wanted and he needed to get out and have his own life and get away from them; that that would pay them back every day of their lives. And he did it. He has a wife and kids and 💘 in-laws and we are so happy for him. He doesn't go near his family anymore.

[@annfoster3863]

EXACTLY! ! I finally got free of a friend I've known since Junior high. She is so selfish and likes to not pick at me but when I point out HER faults, she gets very angry. I I finally permanently ended this crazy excuse of a friendship I couldn't be any more happy and free ! When she sees me she shoots hateful looks at me and I DON'T CARE. This gal also spreads gossip about me, but the ones she does this with have begun to avoid her and THAT really pisses her off 🤭 actually she loves to NIt pick at me but auto fill typed not instead

[@Jackgritty28]

Torture them with mind games,turn the tables if you feel victimized by it,slander shouldn't be tolerated,evil people need to cause trouble,be aware of it,and nullify it and move on,if you ignore it they'll go crazy,if their not getting the response that they needed,point out any of their weaknesses,they'll hate you for it,don't let them waste your time,when the emotionally intense situations that they crave doesn't eventatiate they try to escape,because they themselves are unable to keep their own emotions on a tight leash💥❌

[@thebigh9635]

As empaths we make the greatest audience , we praise , we flatter , we encourage and we support them . When we remove ourselves they become a player on a stage with empty stalls !

[@malindalewis5715]

🤣🤣🤣

[@thipimotsoare4228]

🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 So true

[@nikkiw5406]

🤯

[@BeingRashmi43]

😂😂😂

[@AZDC99]

"How DARE YA?! Where IS your SO-CALLED empathy for my 'abuse' of you ANY LONGER?!?! WAH.." 'SCREAMING til the cows come home!" Like Rebecca says, "STOP BEING THEIR SUPPLY" and my favorite TRUTH OF LIFE, "When you give them a taste of their own medicine, they can't STAND IT!" Amen plus PLUS ONE!

[@goldilocks3593]

I learned from experience: stop reacting to them or feeding into their nonsense on any level. Get on with your own life. Put yourself first and be happy about it. They will lose their sh*t, believe me 😂

[@MsDondon23]

Hallelujah to that! Ignore whatever they might be saying and just don't take that personally. Remember - it's not about you at all, anyone could have been in your place, they're just looking for narcissistic supply.

[@smoothmorrison7203]

Truth. It's like the best. The people who they slandered you to will start degrading their dumb A, for they don't see any problem with you but the one man lonely, loud, ridiculousness the Narc and the flying monkeys are performing to get you to respond wasting time doing the most childish ish. Wait! The CHERRY. jumping up and down screaming like a 3 year old with ONLOOKERS. Boy the disbandment and the sideeyes at the Narc, Priceless. 😇✌💛🍷

[@DoubleRainbows-fp6ih]

@@prometheuspredator7971 -EXACTLY as Ross Rosenburg Says: Observe & Don't absorb!

[@a.m.7135]

@@Human_Organic Yes, those adjectives sound like what mine says.🤭 He's the most unstable and irrational person I've ever encountered. Hard to rise above the slander but absolutely necessary.

[@keeperofknowledge4120]

Amen Goldi! Indifference drives them crazy. Not love, not hate, not revenge, not anger...indifference. They will receive a narcissistic injury to the highest degree. IN their minds, they are a cut above the rest and they love bombed you and in their minds gave the greatest gift a person can ever receive: attention from them.

[@rome8131]

Torture Them 1. Cut off all association 2. No revenge, they are already hurt 😢 3. Give them no validation 4. Remove your friendship from them.

[@judyrank7084]

Thks for listing

[@ammararafique5237]

No. 4

[@lindalemon2952]

Quit doing chores for them. Ignore their remarks. Leave the room. Ignore their moods. Do not compliment looks; only true achievements. Stop following on social media. Disengage. Forget them as much as possible.

[@rise2power291]

I just gave my last bit of energy to my narc.

[@whereisyourhumanity7557]

Yes. Leave the room.

[@sanjanabhatia5156]

Living well is the best revenge. 🌸💥💛

[@KittyM-]

So true. Toxic people seek out kind, generous people to drag out of, it's such a shame.

[@peterknyk1942]

"Turn out the lights, the parties over...." the narc don't like that....

[@SunShine-fo2wp]

👌

[@michellepetersen1354]

My Indifference drove him nuts 🤣

[@vickielewallen3799]

Exactly. Indifference is the *perfect* response. Anger, fear, compliance, etc are all interaction. Indifference is like starving their ego, to death.

[@Juliet39300]

Same!

[@ryanreagan6073]

Ignoring them it's as good as splashing them with boiling water they can't stand it

[@mrln04]

Mine will do the silent treatment but when she realizes that i don't care, she breaks the silence in order to try to start an argument. They can't stand not being in control LOL

[@1010QUEEN7]

Good I will ignore him the rest of my life

[@jebidiahnewkedkracker1025]

Yes, I think I would prefer someone ignoring me to being splashed with boiling water. (But then again, if my face became horribly disfigured as a result of being splashed with boiling water, I might become THAT MUCH HARDER to ignore.) My screams of PAIN would definitely be hard to ignore!

[@pcihazer20]

Recently stood-up to my Narc mother and put her in her place and therefore, her apocalypse is here!! :P Thanks for all the good knowledge!

[@Kristen10-22]

Ditto!!! Way to go! Hard af right? I just did the same

[@pcihazer20]

@@Kristen10-22 Awesome, congrats! Heck yeah it's difficult but so worth it. Godspeed :)

[@mariposamoreno]

SAME!! lmao!!! go us!

[@marcirobins5144]

Ooh! Always wear your body armor. It isn’t over…

[@LIVdaBrand]

😂😂😂

[@n.k8841]

I don't think that people who was hurt by a narcissist want a revenge but looking for justice.

[@marcirobins5144]

There is no justice. Looking for justice keeps you on their battlefield. Just live your best life seeking nothing from them. Save yourself.

[@danbride9407]

Yes justice will always assert it self in reality im saying it again and again and again until there is and there will be after all this time

[@Hun_Uinaq]

absolute truth.

[@YoAdrienn]

My revenge was: you are dead to my, a fly on the wall, no contact. You don't get a piece of me ever again, rot in your own miserable hell. Of course he didn't know these things, never told him. I went cold turkey on him. It was interesting to bump into him on a birthday party 7 months later. He smiled and was happy to see me and said hi to me. I was already smiling because i was talking to someone and had no idea he was there. So i said Hi with my frozen smile and turned away. Never a word or an eye contact again, i ignored him. It felt so satisfying that I didn't give him any attention and was not interested in his fake charm, plus i had a good time at the party!

[@dancindebs1]

And to stop them from hurting others

[@ryanreagan6073]

The element of surprise is everything you always want to catch them off guard that makes it so much more devastating they underestimate people they don't even think about you packing up and leaving their arrogance won't left of them it comes as a shock a major shock

[@samahbenahmed5789]

True

[@fromcaterpillarstobutterfl6698]

A torture of a narc is: don’t be available when they want you to be. Only be available upon your own timeframe. They hate rejection especially when they’re trying to be around you.

[@user-of9bx1uk3u]

Yep!!!👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@iys6890]

They can't stand not getting their own way!

[@yvonnelygo681]

Supply is interaction on a 3D level. No interaction = No Supply. Rise up, Look Down and Giggle.

[@denisecallaway9140]

During one of his typical rants degrading me, I pointed out to my narcissist that he was, indeed, a narcissist. He stopped us mid-sentence with a hurt look in his face and replied “you called me a narcissist!” He was in utter disbelief I had the audacity to point it out to him. I still revel in that reaction. It’s as if he knew he’d gotten caught.

[@johnnycorn7225]

Game time is over all I have for a narcissist is a big barrel of nothing and it's free!!! Dealing with them has just made me adapt and be more ruthless than they are. I probably contracted some narcissistic fleas I'll get rid of them soon enough.

[@flowerchild7820]

If you need a can of piss off spray I have a good supplier. Lmk . Have the best life ever!❤️ be free live free

[@johnnycorn7225]

@@flowerchild7820 yep enjoying your freedom away from their clutches is all you need to do

[@kimberlygreidanus5639]

thats hilarious, never heard of that comment before of "contracting narcissistic fleas" ...yep our medication for that is self awareness and moving on in life, and showing them that our success lies in the beholder of truth and honesty/vulnerability and God given power, Amen

[@isabellalapobo4758]

@@kimberlygreidanus5639 Amen to that

[@LizaLavolta]

My pastor said this to me, "You're holding all the cards." They make us feel powerless, but they NEED US. The best thing you can do for yourself is also the thing that will mess them up. Go no contact, heal, move on truly. They will dwell for years and years and years. But do it for you! Bc these ppl are tortured inside already. I pray God helps them. Only he can.

[@missangiee66]

I've been narcissistic mother-in-law free for 9 glorious years We tried the other suggestions along the way but she just persevered. We even warned of a cut off if the behaviour continued and she didn't believe us. The hubby's brother and wife cut her off as well. This mother's day the brother got a text message stating, "Isn't 9 years long enough to blame your mother for everything?" "Let's get together and talk" Yes, 9 yrs and still no self reflection. Needless to say there will be no conversation. It's unfortunate.

[@davidhinkson8856]

She sounds like Marie on Everyone Loves Raymond! A woman completely blind to her nasty ways

[@missangiee66]

@@davidhinkson8856 Worse lol

[@qdubaconst9190]

@@davidhinkson8856 Marie was nice no?

[@raccuia1]

That's how to do it. Both partners being on the same page and together throwing the trash in the can and closing the lid real tight.

[@pitasag123]

Thanks to you and my willpower... I was able to flee safely... I thank God everyday that my safety plan worked. It got VERY scary and even after a year later he's still trying to access us. Abusing the courts now. 9:42

[@GciFearless]

Listen to this woman and get yourself free

[@alexisworst2568]

They hear tones like dogs hear whistles!!! I love it! Sooo glad I found your channel!! TORTURE THEM!! hahahaha

[@shyamaliroy4081]

Just no contact and moving away did the wonders. The man i loved dearly is on his path to doom. Drnken brawls....picking up fights vth frnds.... obsessed vth porn......disgraced by family. The revenge is complete. Not gloating but feeling like justice done. Karma got him afterall. Jus by going NOCONTACT

[@davidhinkson8856]

Torture them! But be careful - best thing to do is get away from them altogether.

[@DoubleRainbows-fp6ih]

Exactly- as they know very well how to demolish your emotions. Be very guarded in ALL you do. The best defence is not just Grey Rock But more. Study & Apply methods & KNOW you are not alone thoughthey try their hardest to make you feel so.

[@amandamagby3253]

Yea! I just GHOSTED!! Seems mean but NO CONTACT is the ONLY WAY!! Delete! Block! And vanish on them! But be safe still cause they WILL STALK YOU!!

[@giginati0324]

Why should I torture them and this back fire on me

[@finleyscotland]

No Contact for 2 yrs!! He never saw it coming. Just walk away and do not look back.

[@hissyfitz7890]

“TORTURE THEM!” Wouldn’t really do it but it’s a tempting thought. 🤨

[@crencottrell7849]

1.) Stop complimenting/sucking up to them 2.) Stop giving them any narc supply 3.) Cause them narcissistic rage 4.) Discard yourself from them *I don't need to torture them; they're already tortured souls anyway*

[@lovewhitey2027]

Thanks recap ✍🏻U are Everywhere Waldo 😉

[@Fay_F_2]

All true , they thrive off of our good energy , compliments and any energy . Cut off their supply

[@sharonscott3662]

Just stay out the way and stop trying to war with them. Just live .

[@jefahugs5207]

I am so ready for it that letting him know that I am letting him out of my life is no problem and just see him try and learn the triggers he is using, I can see where I am not strong yet and seeing him break is sometimes so soothing. I have never been like this to people but I have been played by so long after so many given chances, he knew if he would break me our kids could suffer, by doing his dirty game over and over again he risked the health of our children - and didnt expect a mothers lion heart 💪

[@dawnf2z1]

Love your clarity and focus upon being genuine and aware that these people are always going to come in and out of your life. I’m all for maintaining integrity and learning not to be drawn in and lose our minds. Thanks so much, Rebecca!

[@danbride9407]

Same here im pretty much committed to myself to catch a video every day at some time or catch a previous one and take my notes or make comments and Read a few.

[@innertuition7363]

the narc i was seeing used my empathy to hurt me, but i was reborn a super empath and now the tables turned.. they are buliies but are really cowardly broken children..

[@taylortrueblood8570]

Definitely dish it out but can't take it in return

[@arturodiaz1063]

You can answer them out loud, "Houston! We have a problem." Keep repeating it followed up with a lot of gray rock. Give them a panoramic view as you look at them batting your eyes.

[@PrettyToez07]

🤣🤣🤣"Houston, we have a problem"

[@jennamarie982]

😂😂😂😂😂💯💯

[@luzmariagonzalez4352]

🤣🤣🤣 cucu cucu Houston we have a problem 🤪jajaja

[@lindagrey288]

No longer concern myself with their damaged selves. That is their business. Mine is to mind mine. There is no room for their cruelty in my life. If there is forgiveness it is for myself.. for being involved with them in the first place.

[@sophielerner1882]

Really helpful and reassuring, thank you so much. The narc in my life drew me in and built me up and they then systematically bullied me and destroyed my confidence. It was easy to make the decision to slide away. I’m kind of annoyed with myself for letting it all happen in the first place! But now I can’t stop ruminating about it all. What was I thinking? Now I want to move on and stop worrying about it all as it took up so much of my time, life, energy etc. That is my next task!!! Washing away the toxicity… somehow

[@candaceevans1044]

I wish I knew about you 3 yrs ago! My counselor said my husband of 23yrs sounds narcissistic. And he is! I was like a bird in a cage. He sabotaged any and all of my relationships.THE WHOLE TIME WE WERE MARRIED! After I walked out, he turned my 3 children against me. It's been 3 yrs since I left and my "adult" children are still his flying monkey's :( But I'm their mother and have done my best to protect them from him their whole lives! If it's possible to do, can you do a video about how to "win them back"? We're on talking terms, but I'm sure it's only because he's using them to find things out about me. I went no contact. And thank you SO much for your videos!! You are an absolutely blessing!!❤😉🌻

[@keeperofknowledge4120]

Indifference drives them crazy. Refuse to participate or put in any energy into the situation. Not love, not hate, not revenge, not anger...indifference. They will receive a narcissistic injury to the highest degree. In their minds, they are a cut above the rest and they love bombed us. In their minds they gave us the greatest gift a person can ever receive: attention from them. Our indifference shows that their existence is not nearly as profound as they think it is.

[@SovereignDirt]

Narc mother went to visit sister, narc dad is going crazy. He goes to town for the smallest thing, sometimes for no reason, sometimes multiple times per day. He seems to expect me to keep him entertained. He hovers around me, reminding me of a child trying to get their busy narc parents attention. I only speak when spoken too and I never need anything from him. If he gives me something, I leave it untouched. If he makes a decision, it will change, usually at the last second. I never ride with him, as I no longer trust my parents, because I have discovered they have only pretended to protect and guide me as a child. Everything revolved around them and their feelings, their irritability, their convenience, their drug addiction. Any benefit to me was either coincidental or compromised, never of pure concern. Always strings attached. Having been dealt with treacherously by mother, for the last time, I'm done trying to be A good son, hell, I'm done trying to NOT be a disappointment. Now, its payback time. Prepare to be disappointed for the last time.

[@missangiee66]

Yes always strings attached and never unconditional love. Live your life and don't fall for and let go of the FOG (fear obligation and guilt)

[@icalotdonthide2646]

I always remember the bible verse - When my mother and father forsake me,God takes me up. He has us, always.

[@Paulpepe2008]

Let me tell you something!! Yo can NEVER do right! You can NEVER do enough! 95% of the time all they do is complain. You can hit the lotto and instead of enjoying multi millions they’ll get stuck on how much taxes you had pay!!!

[@kimberlygreidanus5639]

Yes, its time to break free from the chains of control and abuse...glad your learning how to make them squirm just through ignoring, disregarding and cleanly playing the manipulating card, but its all for your best and honestly their's too bc the more their shut down THE BETTER!! We are doing them wrong, and us, when we enable the abuse to continue...Bless you in your healing and moving on in life as narcs will never change adn we all will reap what we sow someday, so their lot is decided already!

[@VvpandoravV]

My narc mother, who I went no contact with years ago, is now elderly & told a mutual friend (she’s always on my side in this due to my “mother” trying to smear me to her in my teens) she “Wants to make it up to me now “. I lmao & told her to tell that demon that that ship sailed DECADES ago! 😁

[@dyoung2739]

I cut off my narcissistic in-laws years before actually filing for divorce. Best decision ever!

[@missangiee66]

@Gemma Dann It depends whether your partner can see the abuse and whether they were a flying monkey and enable the narcissism. It is a big pill to swallow. I went through hell with my partner and we actually broke up for a few months but 13 years later and 9 yrs mother-in-law free now. It is your partner's responsibility to manage his parents and not allow any abusive behaviour towards you (mine couldn't so a cut off was the easier decision because he can avoid dealing with his mother). A partner should always come first, children next then extended family & friends.

[@davidhinkson8856]

Thanks for this - tried to tell my wife that for years before I recognized she was a narc herself.

[@dyoung2739]

@Gemma Dann He didn’t cut them off because he’s a narc too. I acted like I really wanted to go to his family functions but had work or some other mandatory function that I didn’t want to go to. Since he is a narc,sadly he was happy thinking I was doing something that made me unhappy.

[@dyoung2739]

@Gemma Dann Yeah with my narcs family,it was y’all vs us with them. In-laws were seen as outsiders In their eyes. My mother in law jokingly calls in-laws “outlaws”.

[@malaika4960]

I have done the same. His entire family plus some from my side who were flying monkeys.

[@iand7475]

Met my first ever narrcasist 6 months ago. She's a covert sexual narcacist and I only realised what she was a couple of days ago. I swear to god I had no clue whatsoever I being manipulated. It just hit me like a wall and it all became clear. Dumped her today. My Heart is broken But it was a valuable life lesson.

[@beachgirl9234]

My daughter and grandson experience horrendous abuse from 5 narcissist drug using alcoholics users and abusers. I pray my daughter will please stay with, escape and let me stand by her side to fight for their lives. They want trust money. Let those bad people keep it and set my daughter and grandson free!!!

[@cymbolichuman433]

Your daughter needs to take responsibility for your grandson.

[@judytuhy5287]

You are so right about the proper distance. Which to me was turning my back on their life and encouraging your own. That is because you have been orbiting so long in their life. It was a wrongfully placed priority. The best thing is going back to school. Something about learning helps create your balance.

[@jazzsoul1695]

This is an excellent video! With several narcissistic men, I just had to break it off. They always had other " ladies in waiting", but I got my sleep back and good energy. My narc son, likes to go on big rants about what I "should be doing". He gets v insulted if I don't give a big chunk of time. I usually say " Ok I do have a phone call in 10 min, or must go to such n such". Its nice way to say: I dont have 25-30 min for your news analysis!

[@edgreen8140]

I did mention a big mistake she made crashing the car and not even saying im sorry. She used the 3rd assertion of control withdrawal to her bedroom.

[@kenconley9642]

Hi Rebecca, I tune in to your channel every day. I want to learn as much as possible about narcissism so I can avoid narcissist in the future.

[@lovewhitey2027]

Go to vital mind psychology YT he has videos for men he is brilliant and the comments are informative ✍🏻

[@patriciahindman9721]

You are so kind to remark that revenge is not the object. Kindness is always best. When it comes to narcissists… being kind to yourself has to come first.🥰

[@debravogt7139]

I left my ex. He left me broken and bloody on a floor . I crawled into the bathroom and locked the hole core door. I was sure I would survive the night. I called my grown daughter, and the kids that I had cared for while they were growing up.. I put schedule on the table just like always, except I changed my day off to Friday. He left at 4:30 am. An army of young men showed up. I was packed and hidden within 2 hours. That included the storage units. It was military precision. They had look outs that he wouldn't know! It was amazing. It showed me how easily he took over my life. Don't doubt yourself!

[@jc10907Sealy]

Make them “Slither on down the road” lol 😂 I’m dead 💀😂🤣😂

[@Fay_F_2]

Lol 😂 I liked that one too

[@stylecollector4865]

My wife ( narcissist) losses her mind every day ( my kids used to call her Katy kaboom) lol

[@markkindell6365]

The best way is being calm and keeping your composure, work really good on aggressive people to ,as in road rage etc

[@cymbolichuman433]

It does seem awfully terrible being outwardly attempting to make another being miserable, and it's fun for them... But if you are tired of it all, no reaction is the thing they really can't stand. I say: "hey look at the mirror and tell yourself ( whatever ) because you're the one who really cares ... but I don't."

[@tinablok5700]

I told my narc husband that my therapist diagnosed me being a victim of narcessistic abuse caused by my husband. This was the moment he planned his moving out, as he knew that I know. I have never felt better. Now he found a new victim, poor soul, but I am free.

[@jillb7234]

Thanks for your advice! I’m about out the door!!

[@Hopper11]

You’re so awesome for helping us like this, Rebecca. Bless you. It’s helping! It’s saving lives! Thank you

[@kristinah4448]

Thank you for all of your videos. I’ve just had my psychiatrist retire after 30 years. My 3 year old twin daughters were murdered by their father during a weekend visitation almost 10 years ago and now I am a complete piece of crap according to people who used to love me……so I thought. They won’t help me find names or resources and I am on borrowed time medication wise. Having found my daughters, I have now added grief and PTSD to my brain that was already depressed but very functional and healthy with treatment. Now their true colors are vivid. They want nothing more than for me to go inpatient, which I did on my own 7 years ago. That is their answer to everything. What they don’t like is the new me, the adult me, the one that has to survive because I have one child left to live for. I’m not the one in need of inpatient again. I’ve been through enough being put in isolation in a not so good neighborhood with no car. Withholding resources and leaving me dependent on my mother who I thought was the worst of the 3 I am dealing with. The worst of the 3 was the one that let me move back to my birthplace to “get away from the messed up behavior” ended up being the queen bee and that’s when the real smearing and extra trauma began. She has not spoken to me after thinking she was my lifeline and pretended to be until I actually lived with her for a year. That’s when I realized exactly what I was dealing with. I’m alone now. Literally. No friends no nothing and now my psychiatrist of 30 years has retired and I am panicked. My mother’s answer to all my problem….once again…inpatient because I’m nuts and not well. Projection and abuse as usual.

[@fairy9749]

The way I deal with narcissists is initially building them up with compliments, narcissistic fluffing as they call it. Once they're in their comfort zone with their head in the clouds; I withdraw it and only praise when my work is done by them, if they don't comply I shame them. As a result I get my way everytime. As for their reaction I don't care, whenever they lash out I walk out as if I don't have time for their nonsense.

[@Juliet39300]

Good riddance, this sounds exactly like mirroring the narcissist. It sounds like you are becoming like one in retrospect

[@stroNg2thaBoNe2thaMax]

This is the very same narcissistic behavior that you are displaying to them. It's unhealthy and it shows that you are just as bad as they are.

[@fairy9749]

@@stroNg2thaBoNe2thaMax nope, it's called mirroring the narcissist. The difference is that you have a healthy self esteem and do these specific behaviours ONLY with the narcissist.

[@theknifeman7097]

Wow. Just wow, this seems wrong and kind of mean.

[@theknifeman7097]

Justify it how ever you want but you are just as bad as them fairy seriously if it is that easy for you to behave like that you may have a problem.

[@MagsChase1229]

Hi Rebecca, After I listened to your great advice and read many comments below, most of your followers agree with you, "get away from the narc, get on with your life" I do have a bridal shower and upcoming wedding next mos of Narc's child. This grown child has always been kind, loving to me and has a happy smile always and interest in me, the Aunt. The fiancee is so friendly & kind too. The narc was upset with me a few weeks ago because I didn't follow the narc's unwritten rules about a party I could not attend for a distant relative. As you have often heard, and same here, the Narc tried asking if I was feeling ill, or sad, then guilting me, telling me I'm this kind of parent to my children, etc. Sent my a crazy poem saying I'm a lost person, can't find my way back, I'm a shell of who I was. (all because I didn't go to distant relative party and did something I wanted to do.) Narc hoped I would like the poem. Narc said, "it sums up everything". So I ignored texts, so Narc and pretty much told me I had to decide if I wanted to be invited to Narc's grown child's bridal shower. Hmm, that's what the Rsvp is for. I sent a brief text, 'send invitation' and what day/month is it." Of course, it is the 1st day of my long awaited vacation. Anyway, I can delay vacation a day. I feel rather confident and know I can follow your advice. I really don't think I should tell the couple to be married what has been going on. They must be so excited for their wedding and shower. Besides, the Narc's child must have lived thru a lot of this disappointing behavior for a few decades. I just am grateful you and followers have given me such helpful advice. Thank you and Blessings to you and everyone.

[@SusanaXpeace2u]

A couple of covert scapegoating narcissists have treated me like a ghost because i dont admire them. I wasnt rude though. I guess i felt like i was privately still assessing! But they sensed my wariness around them *nothing was said* and then they set out to exclude me from the group. TWICE this happened.

[@flowerchild7820]

I’m not in your situation but in my opinion and experience with DV and narcs my whole life. I’m 61 now they never stop being their true selves. Sometimes events seem to be puzzling and crappy but later on maybe years later you think back and be like wow it was a blessing it’s just hard to see at the time. Be free live free ❤️✨

[@DoubleRainbows-fp6ih]

Susan C- Me too where I live. Astonishing...it has been to me How much Value they place on others actions/ perceived INDIFERENCE!!! Golly; how Weird & demonised they Trully are!

[@christinehow3595]

Best way is too say I've booked a hotel . And when they turned up I had gone home !! He went mental thinking he was on a promise . Repaired him for all the crap he gave me .lol

[@shyamaliroy4081]

Grt idea! Wanna try this and see his stupid face😀😀😀😀

[@christinehow3595]

@@shyamaliroy4081 please take care if you try this . They are dangerous with mental illness!! Thing is hes now moved 10 miles from me and been sitting outside my house . But he cant get in I have BIG GATES up 😁 Take care and write again if I can help .

[@Coyote-wm5op]

I found that being dismissive of them and standing your ground calmly really makes them mad.

[@JoseSanchez-vb6sq]

Thank them. As horrible as it sounds. I thank my ex wife. I’m no longer vengeful nor resentful. She has become obsolete in my life. 20 year purgatory but I’m free and liberated. I’ve learned very hard lessons, I’ve done intensive soul searching and shadow work. Now I’m at peace. Dumped religion but found my spirituality. I’m learning to trust my intuition, identifying triggers, and most importantly, I’m so loving myself. I’m a 6’4” empathetic care bear. And that’s ok. I love who I am. I love helping and healing. Thank you

[@shanesim5021]

Thanks for the advice about not seeing revenge... That really helped!! 👍

[@maisumsobreviventedeabuson5277]

I like the way you teach us not using religion, which is a great source of supply to narcs

[@megirl7773]

I wish I had known this all before I met my ex. I was physically assaulted by my narc ex recently. I now have to try to heal mentally,physically, emotionally and the legal system. So glad I am free of his abuse.

[@markcarlisle3711]

I love you ❤️ I torture them so bad. Everything is flipping back on them...😆

[@clnhunter9137]

I love it … WE hold all the cards… just blow them off with a smile… hang with your good and true friends, and ENJOY your life

[@kattanderson170]

Listen to this woman. Awesome thanks.

[@clnhunter9137]

My best way has been … when they pull their crap is to smile … and say “that doesn’t work for me… take care of yourself and I’ll see ya when I see ya…”. They absolutely implode and it is soooo fun to witness…

[@carlosp.3330]

My best defence against a narcissist is for every attack on me I just reply back to them nice and calming , your mental.. Works omg like a virus.

[@lucywong7968]

I love giving them a taste of their medicine

[@AmericaLives-r2m]

OMG you hit the nail on the head

[@mankydave67]

Let them “slither” after someone else. I love that snake …… slug reference. That’s all they are. Brilliant video. Thank you.

[@clintonzastre4196]

Moving on is the best way

[@lwontherez7927]

Careful. Make sure you know that when you stop giving the narcissist narcissistic supply.. that they will likely begin investing more and more in a new source of supply (as they are always keeping an eye out for new sources of supply and testing them to see if they would be ah good source).. in other words, know that this could lead to the narcissist discarding you. Make sure you’re prepared before you investigate this “withdraw supply” technique.

[@cymbolichuman433]

You don't want to hold on to that relationshit do you? Best new ever... no where in sight and with a new supply.

[@johnpaulsecond4626]

amazing use of analogy to translate the essence of narcissism;

[@cattleNhay]

I like to mess with them by repeating the exact same words they once said. Or when they say something tell them” a friend of mine says you’re wrong “

[@timoneil1117]

Yup. It works.

[@jonathanandrade7775]

So I just started learning about narcissist relationship about six months ago. I was dating someone older than me for 2 years and half and I feel that it was a cycle because about every 4 to 6 months we would have this fight and not talk for about 2 to 3 weeks. Each cycle was just as accurate as I seen on the KZbin videos love booming devaluation and descarding and after couple weeks of not talking she or I would call and that's where I would see she miss me and almost felt like value me again so I would try to make things better or in other words fix her. I felt like she would get tired of me once I'm in there hooked then she act not interested then she wants her space. I would try to talk to her to ask why she acts uninterested but by me trying to fix the root of the plant/problem so that flowers can grow healthy flowers, she would transform the situation into this big fight when I was just trying to express myself. I felt I couldn't question her I felt like I have to keep my mouth shoot and be careful what I said just to not pissed her off. I'm a man of piece I don't like conflict but I refuse to be a pushover. The last discard from her was about a month ago and i blocked her number but she hasn't send my belongings that I kept at her place yet. So is that bating? 🤔

[@Hannah_BananaXO]

This is my MOTHER! 🤦‍♀️🤢🤮🤒

[@grantaugustyniak6667]

I give them supply alright - I’m living a full happy life & I tell them all about it ! Another thing that drives them absolutely crazy is to not respond to them right away. Answer their question- with a question right back to them - They really hate that. Or just flat out tell them the truth- they really, really hate that ! A bonus : tell them their looking old. HA !

[@felineaura]

Thanks for saying that about 'don't worry about getting revenge on them'. I've never been soo tempted towards revenge-seeking EVER,, i'd just go no-contact. Maybe i'm tempted towards revenge currently cuz I know all abt. it now and I'm angry that I kept this pet narcissist for as long as I did. - _ - *sigh* revenge will only gratify them tho lulz imo

[@renukrai2838]

Toucher them like hell Thank you so much for sharing 👍

[@woollyfae]

Mine stripped me of everything, tried to cripple me in business, and sent my life spiraling into a sink hole. I gave everything trying to be loyal, forgiving … worthy … and this man put me through things that, if spoken out loud, sound like fiction. While this makes no sense to most people, my biggest loss was my dog. I lost EVERYTHING, but She was a constant companion on my darkest days. His dog nipped him one day trying to get him off of me, but he beat that dog with his fists. Yet, he smeared me and lied on me to make himself look like less of a monster for keeping MY dog. So, yes, I wanted justice. After so much mental torture and so much anger, I literally told him exactly what a low down psychotic useless predator I thought he was. And then, I felt ashamed. I never got justice. I never will. I was equal to the dog - a PET. His dog better adore him. His dog better never turn on him. He can kick his dog or yell at his dog … because it’s just a dog. That’s what I was. And when I finally turned on him, all I did was validate every rotten psychotic behavior he ever exhibited. He still watches me. I’ve had to learn how to protect my devices beyond the norm and delete partitions after a reset so he doesn’t access accounts and compromise my work. And any anger I exhibit - and attempt to get justice backfires and brings him pity and support. So my best move? Pretending he does not exist. Never cry out loud. Never speak his name. Nothing he can ever imagine was caused by him or reflects on him. It’s hard. But it’s the best weapon.

[@Samzjem]

oleOleole good show Rebecca .. bonus always looking Good 👍

[@martinhelman8903]

Wow. I could not listen more then 1,5 min and strongly think: you remind me to my ex. The same eyes, the same devils energy. Good luck with your channel. I think you are a real Narcissist expert. But me as a SE - i cant stand it. God bless you ❤🙏

[@paulkishfy8528]

Thanks Rebecca so great to have an understanding as to what I've been going through and to know I'm not alone

[@brettweary8491]

Absolutely Rebecca Reverse Psychology

[@infantrycaptain9224]

I love the name Rebecca and you look fantastic!🎖

[@dianeatwood1297]

Living your best life i best way to get revenge. When you stop wondering or caring - you win. Drives them nuts.

[@carrollhayes6759]

Not doing things when he requests it. He withholds affection when we wants to control me and I have learned to say NO. To walk away to find enjoyment elsewhere.

[@jillianmaloney3544]

Ur merch is fun. Gonna make that my mantra: I’m a narc slayer…narc slayer…narc slayer….

[@gladiatorninja1222]

Crush their flase image!!!!

[@THAQUEENB82]

I definitely making my narcassistic ex go crazy to the point he has ghosted me and when he try to contact me, I ghost him. I've told him all about his insecurities, he got hella upset and tried to talk down on me..I laughed at him and hung up in his face. He has met his match and I'm an empath.

[@justdaddrums2704]

Thanks, Mrs.Rebecca. Your content is helping to move on with confidence. 🙏❤

[@andresgarciazermeno4944]

Thank u so much i learn lot !! Thank u so much 🙏🙏🙌

[@cindys5426]

Oh this is sooooo true.If you try to call them out ,and tell them to at least be truthful...Wow they flip out..You cut contact.,Then they tell everyone , "Well I don't know what happened I guess ______ just holds a grudge.🙄

[@mv-kq9id]

I let my narcissist friend break it off with me after 6 months of dating. What a rollercoaster of emotions. I went through the cycle, idealization, devalued, don’t forget thier rage, that was no fun,discarding and finally Hoovering. I finally hurt her with criticism. She was very proud of her sewing, she did a project for me and I told her it was a s… job, she even told me how it hurt her. I bet she has sewed her whole 70 years of life and had never been criticized, it felt being too me, but actually felt good. The hurt she did too me without empathy, I just couldn’t believe she treated this way, I would love too know how her family looks at her when she started bad mouthing me, they all liked me and said I was good for there mom, becareful out there, all that glitters isn’t gold

[@mv-kq9id]

I went no contact 3 months ago, I haven’t heard a thing, also we have no mutual friends so I have no ideal what is happening in her life, and she knows nothing about mine

[@queenfoster7945]

Torture them... Thank you so much for all of the helpful tips. I have put all 4 ways in place. Yesterday was the final step & he didn't see it coming & I blocked him. No more praise, no more answering the phone whenever calling, gave a taste of abandonment, then REMOVED myself from a situation that no longer " served ME"

[@itisaisyah]

Omg am so ready to do #4 🙌

[@yvonnelygo681]

I was sc *** over by a very charming person who I thought I was in Love with. I had to work out a way to recover from the pain.by myself. Many months later I saw a channel on internet which EXACTLY COPIED my same strategy, and they called it How to play the player. I did message occasionally to my ex, but he seemed a bit screwed up, then he disappeared.