REBT Role-Play - Addressing Belief Regarding Expectation of Respect

This video features a counseling role-play in which Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is used to treat frustration. The REBT role-play features a client (played by an actress) who believes she must have respect from her coworkers.

[@Linesofjoy]

Excellent advices from Dr. Grande, I wished I could have a therapist like him.

[@Willow_Mary]

I like the visual she mentioned of the carousel. That's helpful to think of in relation to the cyclical manner of the activating event - belief - consequence, and round and round it goes until you get off of the carousel by changing something about the process. Thanks for sharing this video!

[@laurynmoffa]

This depiction of REBT helped me better understand how it is supposed to work. I've always found it difficult to assist my clients in reconstructing their belief systems because it's not an easy thing to do. My favorite part about this technique was the therapist easing the anxiety of the client having to change her belief by comparing it from "rigid" to "flexible" thinking. I feel like this alleviated the client's demand of having to change her belief system, and instead, reconsider it and start somewhere simple.

[@hithere4951]

I never been a fan of somebody as much as you. Loved all your contents and thank you.

[@lisanoland5134]

Thank you for the demonstration. The role-play clearly illustrated the activating event, the belief, and the consequences. I have been practicing this a little with myself and have found it helpful. The role-play also exhibited acceptance of the client as she is.

[@williamwagner827]

Dr. Grande did a great job of letting the client know he cared. He listened well and it seemed like he made the client feel better about her situation regarding respect. I also like how he incorporated the ABC model in this session.

[@JamieB]

This video is great illustration of what REBT would look like. Clear explanation of what an activating event can be and discussion of consequences. The belief or values system is identified and helps the client to dissect where exactly the anger or resentment comes from. I love how Dr. Grande offers a different perspective to the client so that she knows that she can still function even if she does not get what she wants.

[@jessicavickers3946]

I appreciated that Dr. Grande pointed out that it is not always clear what the A, B, C, D and E's are in Albert Ellis' REBT ABC model. He did a great job breaking it down by identifying the activating event, the feelings associated with it, the consequences and what the intermediate beliefs are. He pointed out that his client's belief system was that her co-worker must show her respect. That falls into the second of the three general categories of faulty beliefs that is beliefs about self, belief about others and beliefs about the world. He was also able to then go into solutions for his client to take with her so that she can change her "rigid" thinking into more "flexible" thinking by challenging her beliefs-disputing them. Being able to have more flexible thinking prevents visceral reactions to other people, places and things that don't meet our expectations.

[@tashastarling870]

I don't think I have the interpersonal patience to be truly good at counseling like Dr. Grande. He is talented at helping others feel accepted and helps them think logically. It's very admirable and I try to learn everything I can from him. I'm very thankful for every video he shares. Watching and learning from him has helped me mentally and emotionally strengthen myself more than anything I've ever gotten from professionals in my province. His insight is a gift. Thank you! (I'm always distracted by that badass armchair. Both look comfy af though I adore that tight floral upholstery and wingbacks. Maybe I can make a job crafting furniture for people to sit in, rather than talk to them in it.)

[@RyanPclifton]

This demonstration brought everything i have read about REBT full circle. Dr Grande did a good job at demonstrating some of the processes in REBT. it was interesting to see how he challenged the client and tried to interpret whether or not what she was believing was irrational or not.

[@miabellaila143]

This has helped me to a better understanding of REBT in session and how to apply the theory to the client. thank you very much.

[@mitamenezes4411]

Love your sessions Dr. Todd,

[@amandavalentino8182]

Dr. Grande- I enjoyed watching your session in regards about the client wanting to receive respect. I think that you challenged the client well with about what respect looks like and allowed the client to look at other view points. You were able to address the challenges that the client was having with another coworker, and also looking at how the coworker might have perceived the clients argument she had with her. You used the ABC model that allowed the client to have her own thoughts of anxiety, what she thought of the criticism, and how to work through it. I like how you were able to show what her beliefs are and how they might be effecting her.

[@brittanyhoffman8068]

I found it very helpful to see the counselor use REBT on this client. The counselor pointed out the activating event, beliefs, and consequences of the client's situation with her coworker. The counselor continuously checked in on the client to make sure she is understanding where he is coming from in explaining things. The counselor was also able to develop goals for the client to hopefully work on by the next time they meet for a session.

[@kristinblake9294]

This session was a great way to depict the strategy involved in REBT using the ABC model. Going through the ABC model step by step was a way to address the client's beliefs and allow her to see it from different perspectives. Dr. Grande also confronted the client's irrational beliefs early on by comparing the client's criticism to her own criticisms of other coworkers. He then explained that the goal was to move from rigid thinking to flexible thinking. This was a great way for me to understand how REBT works within the therapeutic session.

[@remygooch1393]

The use of the ABC model in this REBT session was helpful to point out to the client the components of her expectations of respect. Dr. Grande walked the client through the ABC model to get the client thinking about the activating event, her beliefs toward respect, and the consequences. Dr. Grande worked with the client about flexibility in her beliefs to guide her in her thinking when a situation like this arises. Having the client try and freeze and think about the behaviors of others and her own beliefs in a situation like this can allow the client to think more rationally about her beliefs.

[@dHunter94]

I enjoyed how Dr. Grande challenged the client which resulted in a change in her thinking regarding constructive criticism. Likewise, how Dr. Grande was able to ask questions to dig deeper into understanding why the client was feeling disrespected was key to further implementing the various techniques associated with REBT. This video was a great insight into REBT as well as how the ABC Model was applied in a therapy session.

[@elyshamason9813]

I like the way Dr. Grande gently confronts the client's beliefs by asking them questions about it. Also, explaining to the client how "ABC" works allows them to see those "triggers" and why that belief may or may not be valid. Another helpful tool I found would be asking the client to define those beliefs, in this case it's asking how does she view respect and what it looks like for her.

[@suzgen7323]

Very useful scenario to demonstrate the ABCs of REBT and the repetitive cycle. It was good to see where there may be a discrepancy as to what specifically is the activating event prior to the cycle continuing. The first activating event being the criticism and the possibility of not necessarily one consequence but several.

[@marissabarnes4084]

This video provided an excellent visual for the required readings on REBT. I'm familiar with the ABC model and how it's used in terms of a person's behavior, but that's not the way it was used in this video. Both the counselor and the client work together to identify each part. Dr. Grande even mentioned that it may sometimes be difficult to identify them.

[@marisamaguire8136]

I found the role-play presentation to be very insightful on how to properly integrate the ABC Model into counseling. I appreciated how Dr. Grande, worked with the client to challenge her beliefs and be opened to new interpretations. Because the purpose of the client’s work meetings was to provide feedback and constructive criticism, Dr. Grande was able to work with the client in acknowledging her irrational beliefs, while providing her with a new understanding and perspective, seeing as though her coworker may not actually be disrespecting her, but only offering information that may help the client to enhance her work performance. Similarly, I enjoyed observing how Dr. Grande worked with the client to define her interpretation of respect. In doing so, Dr. Grande was able to determine that the client felt she deserved respect due to the fact that she receives it in her personal life. Overall, I respected how Dr. Grande utilized the ABC Model to reference beliefs and consequences, therefore making the client aware that her beliefs can produce potential results depending on how she reacts to a given situation based on those beliefs and values. For example, because the client had the belief that she deserved respect, when she felt as though she was not receiving her idea of respect, it caused her to react in a way that could have potentially caused more harm than good by approaching her coworker and taking her criticisms personally.

[@johnchristinadarwin8477]

I like the use of the ABC model. The client gained a better understanding of her situation at work. I also like the way that Dr. Grande challenged the client's view of constructive criticism. She was giving similar feedback to her co-workers, and when she received that feedback she felt disrespected. The rigid to flexible thinking also appeared to help the client. Thanks.

[@kiaracb06]

I appreciate the way that Dr Grande incorporated the ABC model into the session to help the client understand what was going on in her work place with her coworker but also as he did that he did great with reflecting her feelings and he made things more clear or what she can do differently in the future based on her rigid thinking and making it more flexible.

[@JamieB]

kiara clayton I loved the perspective he offered and caused her to look at things in a more flexible way. This helps with ways to make a client accountable for their actions and behaviors, but in a positive way which will help them grow once a strong report has been built.

[@QUEENESTHERGLAM]

Good open-ended questions and answers session.

[@MarkoSpin]

Thanks for posting, this is really helpful

[@joseliz8762]

It is informative and educational to see how the ABC model is adapted in a therapeutic session. Specifically with REBT, I noticed the emphasis of basic listening skills, especially reflection of meaning and reflection of feeling. These responses helped the client come to awareness to feelings and beliefs that she was not considering before; she began to come aware of their cause. This type of therapy seemed effective, given that the client had rigid thinking towards her coworkers. Dr. Grande was present with the client and was able to understand her point of view.

[@kristinblake9294]

Jose, I agree with your assessment of the session. The therapy was definitely able to help the client become aware of her rigid view of the treatment she was receiving from her coworkers and become more flexible in her thinking. She was able to see the reality of the situations.

[@kristiewatunya2699]

I think it is important to notice the paraphrasing the clinician is utilizing in the role play. The clinician was able to paraphrase exactly what the client was reporting her beliefs were around work and how she should be respected. The clinician utilized open-ended questions to identify the client to challenge some of her irrational beliefs without the clinician stating that the client was having irrational beliefs. The clinician did not seem like he was giving advice, nor could it be easily identified that the clinician was using any type of confrontation or to have the client challenge her beliefs. I feel that the clinician expressed enough empathy to help assist the client appropriately.

[@ShoreMeetsFarm]

As the counselor, it was evident that Dr. Grande was able to utilize strategic questions and alternative listening skills gain a better understanding of the client's expectation of respect within the situation at hand. Use of the ABC model in the REBT session was successful in assisting the client in addressing and assessing her own behaviors.The counselor was directive and helped the client work through her perception of the events/situation and analyze her own thoughts regarding her expectation of respect from her coworkers.

[@rachelnewberry1089]

The client came in upset about feeling like her coworker was not respecting her in the workplace and after confronting her coworker, the client felt that the coworker increased her disrespect. Dr.Grande did a good job of trying to understand what the client felt was "disrespect". This was a key point in the session because the client realized that perhaps, her belief was irrational because the purpose of the work meeting was to give feedback on employees performances. To do this, the counselor challenged this irrational belief and used the A-B-C model to help the client understand the situation better. As learned in the session, the belief of deserving respect comes from the client's childhood so it may be difficult to overcome. Although, I think that the suggestions that Dr.Grande gave to the client were extremely helpful. In the session, the client learned where her belief was coming from and therefore it is important to also see where her coworker is coming from and to resolve the relationship.

[@jessicavickers3946]

Dr. Grande did a great job of identifying her immediate belief system which stemmed form her core beliefs and schemas that she developed as a child. He then worked with her to help her challenge these beliefs using the D part of the ABCDE model.

[@ericahammond9901]

Prior to watching the video I did not fully understand how the ABC model worked within therapy. I still had some confusion in regards to the difference between belief and feelings. This video does an excellent at portraying how REBT looks like within a session with the client. Dr. Grande does a wonderful job at assisting the client with distinguishing between her feelings and her beliefs. The client was then able to understand that her belief came first and triggered her feelings of being disrespected by her co-worker. The client was then able to understand her feelings were the consequence of her belief. Dr. Grande worked well with the client to assist her in gaining insight towards the intention of the work meetings and the clients reaction to the meetings. The client was open to understand her irrational beliefs and working towards changing them.

[@tamarabakergibbons5715]

This client was so guarded. She reacted in a way that I imagined anyone would when they're being asked to monitor/challenge their beliefs, especially in regards to liberties that belong to everyone such as respect and freedom. Encouraging her to be flexible in her thinking seems to offer protection to her. For example the recognizing that she may not get what she feels she deserves, but life goes on.

[@kassietrala378]

With REBT the process is pretty quick and this is a great example of that. The counselor got right into it and immediately got her to talk about the situation and the belief that was challenged by her coworker. Her desire to be respected lead to a confrontation caused by her own actions of criticism. It seemed very beneficial to have the client herself fill in the ABC model (with a little help from him) to really work through the whole dilemma herself. In the end it was concluded that her belief of deserving respect was a belief that needed to be challenged in a sense that it has constantly impacted the way she feels and interacts with others in her environment.

[@johnfruits3544]

REBT seems to be a good therapy to use, particularly using the ABC model. It allowed the client to see her part in her role played at work and how she might be able to change her behavior to allow a more positive outcome. In collaboration, a clear view was made in helping the client to be able to recognize that perhaps her views were irrational. The client acknowledged this a few times during the session.

[@ashleymogle2700]

I think REBT is a good therapeutic technique to use for impulsive clients, or individuals who might not be as self-aware as others. By breaking down the process and going through the ABC model, clients are better able to pinpoint the exact instances that triggered them, as well as how their thoughts colored their actions. By engaging in this process, individuals are not only able to reach an internal resolution, but they also become more self-enlightened. Due to how directive and brief this therapy is in nature, I wonder how beneficial it might be when working with teens and adolescents.

[@oliviahylton9430]

Ashley, I agree with you regarding using REBT with impulsive clients. The break down you mentioned really lets the client press pause on their behavior and analyze using the ABC model to better understand and plan for future triggers. I can also see how this model can be beneficial for incarcerated men who deal with criminal thinking errors and anti social behaviors due to it's direct and analytical nature. Olivia

[@deniseswindell2175]

I found this theory interesting, I liked the use of the ABC model to help the client take the beliefs and behavior along with the consequences and break them down so that the client could see where her thinking may have been irrational. It was also go od to help her try another approach that would be helpful for the client.

[@misswogdaily2344]

loved the video.

[@ifeelpeaceful]

thank you

[@chelseareeve36]

I enjoyed Dr. Grande's representation of REBT therapy, specifically his empathetic understanding and seeking to understand the concern through the client's perspective. Dr. Grande reminded the client of the "A-B-C Model" and supported her in identifying the cyclical nature of her irrational belief, the criticism received, and her responses. I felt as though his questioning as to whether criticism was a component of the meeting she was describing allowed her to realize that maybe the problem did not lie in that particular co-worker and their criticisms, but in her irrational belief of deserving respect.

[@misswogdaily2344]

loved the video

[@kristiewatunya2699]

I think the therapist utilizing the ABC model to help the client to identify her beliefs that are associated with the activating event with her co-workers. A good question the therapist asked was "What levels of respect that you demand?" The client was able to identify her specific beliefs and passively the therapist was able to have the client to identify how her beliefs could be affecting her negatively.

[@SlyNine]

Respect my authoriti!

[@roberthudson3386]

In my opinion the position of this client isn't unreasonable, people should expect respect as the default, unless they have actually done something disrespectful themselves. If someone criticised me in unnecessarily robust terms at work I would be angry too.

[@missstarrynight7736]

THIS!

[@DJK-cq2uy]

Tis guy seems like he's in alignment with western ignorance that people have to earn respect..no value of people...What a complete Poindexter. The ideas n concepts..solid but thus lout administering?????

[@zhangliaobgsp]

It is tough for him to endure the level of anxiety in the session.

[@polysi4]

How does one get certified in this? Is it necessary to get certified in order to bring model into my professional practice?

[@aphysique]

Those chairs are hideous...Just FYI..but I can relate to Emotive rational behavior therapy

[@kaitlynforaker9832]

I found this theory to be interesting. The ABC's used were clear in this example. It was clear about the beliefs that the client had were picked up by the therapist.

[@jeremyorr]

Person "You criticized my idea, that's not respectful" me: "ok couple things; 1. I'm not required to like your idea if I don't actually like your idea 2. Me criticizing your idea, doesn't mean I don't respect you 3. You also criticize others 4. You thinking that I'm disrespecting you by disagreeing with your idea, is actually you trying to guilt trip me into agreeing with something I don't actually agree with. Which also means 1. You're not respecting me and, 2. Me "liking" your idea, just to make you happy, means I've lost credibility AND means I still don't actually agree with it

[@shelleyc.2576]

How do you manage exiting the room.

[@TariqueSani]

Very little disputation of her demandingness belief was done! No wonder she is not sounding convinced. 🤷🏻‍♂️

[@deadcarnivora8648]

How do you live with yourself when you feel like you have to tolerate disrespect from people I don't know how that can possibly be a good way to live Not reacting when people treat you like crap........ I'm not getting it You would like respect but you don't need it to function? Why wouldn't you need to be AT LEAST RESPECTED by the people in your life

[@DrTasty18]

It's just a fact of life that you wont get respect from everyone. Just like you wont get a please or a thank you from everyone. Or a bless you. More so, you can't force someone to respect you no matter how much you tell them to. Its not possible.

[@mwadjumamukamfizi2216]

Hahah I Like Dc Grande he looks a dad in-front of a child face

[@lynnsmith2648]

Maybe the person disrespecting her is a narcissist. The person may enjoy her responses and hurting her. Just a 💭 thought. The more upset she is the better for the narc. Talking and having a meeting will give the cruel relentless narc more ammunition

[@saminarose80]

Criticism makes me feel like I’m not good enough and then maybe after I reflect and think if it was a helpful feedback I’d feel disrespected because of the way I was criticized! How comes she feels she deserves respect by being criticized with no other connecting points in between? She feels entitled to respect! Is that narcissistic?

[@missstarrynight7736]

Each and every decent person deserves respect. Respect is about our dignity. It's about decency of the other person, good manners. Lack of respect to people is a narcissistic behaviour. It's way different to expect respect vs. expect praise.

[@daguppz7945]

she sounds like my mother. ugh.

[@alllowercase6277]

Aside from the quality content, great acting too, especially by 'Lisa.' A lot of these role-playing vids are corny but this one was on-the-money.

[@misswogdaily2344]

loved the video.

[@DrGrande]

I'm so glad - thank you for watching -