Relationship Reboot: Sibling Rivalry As Adults

As kids, we often fight with our brothers and sisters over silly things. But, as adults, dealing with your siblings can present real disputes and challenges. So in today's Relationship Reboot we're getting some advice on dealing with sibling rivalry. (4:22)
WCCO Mid-Morning - Aug. 9, 2017

[@jacintatate]

I used to respect and look up to my older brother. But after the years of being ignored, and placing second in everything I gave up and stopped talking to him. He also used to make fun of my weight and call me a fat whale (Im only 60kg!).weirdly I don't miss the relationship. when I'm not around him I don't have to think about or compare myself to him.

[@stormchaser419]

I disowned both my sisters. Best thing ever!!!!

[@pyootchnich]

If you have other family members, then no, it’s not the best thing ever. TWO of your sisters? Consider looking in the mirror. My younger brother disowned two of his three brothers due to his pettiness. Destroyed my parents at the end of their lives.

[@isocarboxazid]

@@pyootchnich Who are you to say that? What happened in your family, and your opinions about it, are of ZERO relevance to anyone else.

[@pyootchnich]

@@isocarboxazid if by “zero relevance” you mean “the identical thing happened in both our families” then you’re correct

[@alabina8888]

When a sibling disrespect you over the years...I finally realized it was no ok...it's a tough choice to make but ppl dont change, especially narcissists. I decided to stop being hurt.

[@the100radsstalker93]

Something which no one talks about.. Estranged siblings are a scary sight to behold.

[@jasonholbrook2019]

Not necessarily.Have you ever heard of Liam and Noel Gallagher? They're almost the musical version of Cain and Abel.

[@tauresattauresa7137]

My older sisters always talk about everyone else behind their back, they have nothing good to say ever, it's so sad. But they are blinded to what they do on a regular basis

[@ThelovelyMsGraham]

Mines too

[@lemostjoyousrenegade]

If that’s you in the picture, which I see today (30.10.21), they’re probably jealous of your features (unless they are your identical twin). And if you’re slim and shapely (and they ARE NOT) they’ll hate you and treat you awfully all the more. Just something I’ve experienced (and witnessed) for a long time now. Much Love to you from San Francisco. ♥️ 🌉 💫

[@AttendingBlind]

Man, I wish she was given more time to speak, this is a really interesting conversation :(

[@morethanamess1980]

I was helping my estranged sibling in my dream and my right eye was about to explode. Any love I had for them now just feels conditioned and forced upon me because they were the golden child.

[@gerbaregem]

I am 58 year old female who was born with a disability but treated as a normal child who was in special ed in school and had speech therapy in 3rd grade because my ch sounded like sh and other words. I am the youngest and have 3 older sisters that are 1, 4 & 12 years older than I. Growing up I always felt like an only child. My sisters acted like I they didn't want nothing to do with me by whole life. They always picked on me and bullied me my whole life. Even when my parents told them to stop picking on me and behave. I do know that I was spoiled and my parents were always there for me. But they were also there from my sisters. I remember when by two sisters & I rode our bikes over 8 miles to a really nice park and my mom said to my sisters to keep an eye on me. They both would bike a lot faster than I and I would always be trailing behind and I would asked them to wait up since we were on a very busy highway. But they just kept going and then stopped. But on the way back that didn't matter. They went way a head of me where I no longer saw them. I was in 10th grade but I was in 5 grades below in my reading and someway how I would think. Anyway when they biked ahead of me out of sight. I was so scared and head to walk uphill with the busy highway. I ended up biking to my grandparents place which was before my home. And I called my parents and told them what happen and if they could pick me up. They did after they stayed for a bit and visit my grandparents. I am sure my sisters got a spoken too. but I never saw it happen. My sisters would always do and tease mean things to me. Like whenever my parents were gone I had one sister put my face in dog food, two pushed me off a tree limb we were climbing when I was 5. Whenever their friends came over they would put me in a cold shower when my parents were gone. They always treated me bad when my parents were gone. I always told my parents. We did have a few good times but very few and rarely saw each other in our adult life. After my parents passed away in 1994 dad & mom 2001, they never invited me & my family husband & daughter to any holidays get together except one on Christmas the year my mum passed away in 2001. They have turned their kids against me with telling one I murdered my mum. My mom died in a hospital after having cemo and got an infection which she never recovered from. I was always their with my mom til her last breath and my dad in the hospital everyday. My sisters rarely showed up. I was very close to my parents. My three sisters and their kids and grandkids still celebrate thanksgiving and Christmas together as a family but they never invited us my family and they have turned some of the friends agaisent me and they never email me back and they know my door is always open and I say I was sorry for whatever I did wrong. but still get no respond. This has been going on since 2002. My oldest sister husband my brother in law passed from cancer and nobody told me. I found out three weeks later. I am now 58 and still going through this with them. I do love them so much even though they treated me badly. What can I do or email something to them. Thank you for taking the time to read this. God bless. I have many health issues now and is mostly in a wheelchair because of a stroke and had a heart attack 4 years ago at age 54. Mrs. Geri Murphy.

[@vdavila1018]

Hi Geri, It really hurts when siblings treat you that way. My sister has txted and called me bad names, and has just been so rude and uncaring...Ive always reached out to her to get back to talking, but Im really tired if trying to mend things when its not my fault. I would suggest to either write them a letter or txt them how much you love them and wished to have a good relationship without them bullying you and treating you bad.

[@quinnabiigail]

I am so sorry!!

[@Metalcomedienne]

My story is sort of the same, I'm very sorry for your losses and the estrangement from your siblings. I grew up with a disability and was also in special ed in school. I understand how you feel. I pray for you and the very best on your health and life.

[@gerbaregem]

@@vdavila1018 I already done that by email. They have never reply back. On July 6, 2019 last year my only child my daughter age 40 died in a car accident out of state. I called my one sister phone number and they didn't answer. So I left a message instead. I got a sympathy card with just their first name and no returned address on envelope. My husband and I had a beautiful memorial service. None of my sister's showed up. They claim to be Christian. In my eyes Christian don't act like this. I have always felt like an only child. The last time I saw them was Christmas 2001.

[@tauresattauresa7137]

You need therapy to repair your soul.

[@mcjordan4553]

I need this cause I got a know it all brother who thinks he’s the man of the family but is also a dummy.

[@andreak8384]

I got an idiot and dummy

[@cardomuldrow09]

We must have the same brother

[@johnrainsman6650]

I'm currently jealous of my 16-year-old sister, because she just got herself a boyfriend. I'm 26, and I've _never_ had a girlfriend. Or a date. My older sister got her first boyfriend at 16. Heck, she got a boyfriend about a year after her previous divorce (I think the divorce was the summer of 2021, and she started dating the new guy earlier than a year ago, though I don't know how much time between the divorce and new relationship). So yeah, I'm jealous of both my sisters. Am I a loser for having never dated? The laughable misfit of my sibling group? And this is just without the context of my single life, aside from the hint that I have ASD.

[@TheUnalteredMyth]

Thank you needed to hear this

[@andreak8384]

He is staying here abusive ...even on Christmas he needs help .I'm fine he doesn't talk to me or ignore me

[@susanlong8978]

Umm not silly!! Pecking order!!

[@SairaSabir1443AH]

@3:00