Resilience When You Feel Like A Failure

[@peterterry7918]

I am a doctor who last summer was diagnosed with ADD. I have had several jobs and the administrative/computer aspects of medicine is not friendly to me. I am slowly improving in my performance ( Last summer I also had depression/anxiety/burnout) but I fear not fast enough for what is required of me. I have a wife and four children who depend on me working and having health insurance. I am old enough that I am not sure what I would pivot to so I keep grinding on. Your video today meant more to me than you know. Thanks.

[@johnb.carpenter6862]

You talked about quitting your videos on your previous video. That would be a mistake. This video is so great and insightful. Please keep making videos. You talk about the ways to personally deal with the difficulties of ADD / ADHD more then any videos I have found. Most videos talk about what ADD / ADHD is but not how to deal with it. ( It takes one to know one kind of thing.) I’m in my sixths and have suffered with it as long as I can remember. I have done well considering. I have learned a few things. Stuart you are so insightful about living with this. I know you are helping people. A suggestion, what about interviewing other people with the same problems.

[@adrianrs9520]

This honestly could not have come at a better time, was feeling down today about my lack of achievement but now i feel kindof better

[@dodoliitahable]

I don’t know you but I know that you do have the ability to achieve greatness. You can learn to control your Brain and reach your goals. The fact that you clicked on this video shows that you are willing to learn. I wish you the best. ♥️♥️♥️

[@vmarie2365]

Same!

[@GoADHDGo]

Indecisiveness may, or may not be, my problem.

[@southernsoul152]

🤣☺️

[@penelopefp]

Excellent. Grown adult here with teenagers and just getting back into college. It took a long time to find my niche, but now I have a job I love every day. I don't wake up dreading the day. Life has purpose. It can be such a long bumpy road...

[@ihaveautism666]

youre so strong so happy for you!!! this is so inspirational for me, teen children and in college???? that literally sounds like a nightmare for somebody like me with major a.d.d. who can barely get up and make my own bed. wish you the best

[@AM-zg1fk]

I'm so happy to hear of your success! What job do you do, if you don't mind me asking?

[@penelopefp]

@@AM-zg1fk I work in middle school special education. I've worked as a 1-on-1 aide, as a reading intervention aide and as a Special Day Class aide. I love it all!! Helping the underdogs see their abilities.... joy!

[@AM-zg1fk]

@@penelopefp that sounds amazing! Thank you for replying. Meaningful work definitely helps me push through scattered thinking. You're lucky to have found it.

[@penelopefp]

@@ihaveautism666 don't be too impressed. I'm taking one class at a time. I have coworkers doing the condensed courses, where a semester is jammed into 8 weeks and they are doing 3 classes at a time. I have dishes piled up from two nights ago waiting for the teens to empty the dishwasher. I had a form and a check I needed to get in the mail yesterday.... I'm pretty sure I can get it in the mail tomorrow. I left my desk in a mess today because I forgot I had a zoom appointment with my therapist and I had to leave work in a hurry. BUT....I give myself grace to do my best

[@bapbirb]

I got really depressed and just did nothing for a long time..then I got paralyzed by fear of failure and being a loser. And being unable to function in a society.. I lost all my friends and precious people around me because I distanced myself as I couldn't deal with the fact that I was far behind them. And I constantly told myself that my friends in their mind would think 'What happened to her?'. Ive been torturing myself by ruminating and over wasted potential these days.. its very hard. But Im still alive today. Maybe will tomorrow as well.. and that's what matters for now.

[@DreamingwithD]

Same story here! But don't lose hope. Start with little efforts for yourself and improvement. Compare yourself with your yesterday. Small steps everyday will lead to something beautiful ❤️ sending you love

[@alexisferedinos1430]

Watching this gives a lot of hope thank you.

[@drbrungus]

This was really reassuring and relatable thank you!! 👏 It’s great to see you exploring outside ADHD but still coming from an ADHD perspective

[@vmarie2365]

Very true

[@Fadogar911]

actually, feeling like a failure is a big part, almost even symptom of ADHD.. has to do with not being able to do the simplest things, like being on time, especially while being aware of it and trying to do it the right way..

[@zeppie1347]

Thank you for your vids. I'm 32 and have talked to my doctor and have now been waiting 6 months waiting for a reply from my adhd referral. I am so indecisive with everything and I get so easily bored with my jobs. I'm jumping from hobby to hobby also.

[@ADHDMastery]

Totally get it mate.

[@vmarie2365]

Same! I’m so glad I found this channel 😃

[@louisecoleman5845]

Good to see you posting videos. Thanks for this one, picked me up when I needed it xx

[@danuk2136]

Im 28, i had a son at 18 years old, i had to stop college and find work..both of us have adhd.. i do sometimes feel very unfulfilled, but I've learnt prioritising my mental health is more important than earning excess, i need down time to carry on..great video..hope you keep making them 😄

[@frandavis7727]

Thank you so much for sharing this. I’m 58 and feel I have inattentive type ADHD but haven’t been officially diagnosed. I’m struggling in the job I’m at right now and am wanting to get back into making lampwork glass beads and tie dye which I love doing and am good at. I have known since my first “real” job at 18 that I hate working in an office and any work that has people micromanaging me. Time to get back to what I love again!

[@pauljakeman]

Give it a go! Hope it works out for you!

[@torreycat7716]

Stick with your job and do those on your days off. With ADHD I’m betting that even if you quit your job that you won’t start those other things. Ask me how I know…. Been there…done that. I truly believe that if you can work on those other projects on your days off and evenings instead of watching TV or YT (which is what I did 😢) then you’ll know if those projects will bring in the income that you need. Good luck with motivation.

[@johnb.carpenter6862]

You are so right. It’s so important to persevere and forgive yourself. Believe in yourself even if people around you are achieving more in some ways. Learn to enjoy the little things in life. “ deal with the cards you have been dealt.” Everyone has some kind of flaw.

[@lyfewithdj2258]

Thank you so much for this reminder! I needed to hear it! Btw, Salvador Dalí's "La persistencia de la memoria" is my fav art wrk!🤗💜

[@xoxKIRILLxox]

The most handsome man on the internet ❤️

[@ADHDMastery]

Aw, shucks!

[@077ana]

I totally agree mate. Mega cute , and amazing talent plus he is the only man I listen to as he keeps it real. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@margaridabarata7935]

It's rather "funny" that this video was uploaded this week, as this last few days I've been feeling the most useless, a failure basically. I'm 29 and I'm on my third and last year of university, and I still struggle more than many of my coursemates (who're 9 years younger than me). And just the other day, one of my professors basically told me off for missing a few things when I handed him a project. And frankly it's sort of embarrassing... I feel like I'll always be mediocre, no matter what I do...

[@olol9084]

Will be 36 end of the month, was diagnosed a month before turning 35. I'm doing better but career/financially wise, I'm still extremely far behind. I'm trying, can't give up as I have 2 kids. Videos like this keep me going because in all honesty, day by day I lose hope and sink deeper into depression. I am hoping one day I find true happiness that earns me a living, and I guess I can't give up until that day comes.

[@FromKribToGrave]

Woke up feeling a bit low comparing myself to other people and this was just what I needed to hear. Thanks man!

[@recoveringlibertarian5982]

I am totally stuck in life right now . I have failed at everything in the job market. I am now to old . Thank you .

[@pauljakeman]

Perfect timing man, I felt exactly the same. I still feel like that from time to time. Great shot video and great advice man, nice work!

[@alexander_a.]

I love your new content! I hope to see more! I can see that you're trying to experiment with new camera techniques, but the cuts to the side were unexpected and a bit confusing. I also feel more comfortable looking at you from the front.

[@asmileisspecial]

This came exactly when I needed it, thank you

[@archicurate9421]

Really your changing camera distracted me 😂🤣 thanks for this content so relatable to my condition right now

[@kdlofty]

You've already found your true calling. And you're doing it. Much love and respect my friend. You're a teacher and an inspiration. Keep going.

[@southerndesperado3607]

I've struggled to keep jobs and I've always felt like the odd one out. Only until recently did I discover that I more than likely have undiagnosed inattentive adhd and that it runs in my family. Your videos have helped me with understanding adhd a lot better and help me to keep going forward even though most of the time it feels like I'm lagging behind in life. Keep up the great videos they really do help a lot

[@pallavinautiyal3030]

This was really helpful. Gave some positivity and motivation while I was feeling hopeless and confused.

[@Beefywheels]

That sales call 🤣😭

[@ominousyoshi]

You just put my feelings into actual words. Amazing work Stuart.

[@laco9827]

Thank you so much for this encouraging video. I just watched this a year after you made it. (I am new to your channel. I am 62 and feeling like a failure. I suspect that I have inattentive type ADD. Only hyperactive mentally, at times. In addition, I've had a traumatic life. For a period of time, I attended community college, but I was unable to decide on a major that suited me. I also worked part time at the college. When digestive illness got severe and stress increased, I had to halt my education. That was about 15 years ago. Over the course of my life, thers remarked to me that it was a shame that I had so much potential but didn't succeed. I'm not sure how to proceed forward.

[@theadhdmind9419]

Love this video and can relate so much!

[@ilpaperino9]

Thank you Stuart for this! It came exactly at the right time for me..I've been feeling 'behind' for years and lately, it got worse. A big hug to you and all your followers that share the same pain.

[@danielpawela6637]

I have ADD, and Im sure I also have depression. For example this weekend I have not done anything. I feel tired and lazy. Im just siting with my phome. Im also restles all the time, but I never know what to do with the time. I have no friend and no social life, Im very lonely and unmotivated. Im not enjoying anything, I really dont know what to do with my shitty life. And Im stock in my shitty slavery job I hate. When Im at my job, I just waiting for the day to end. When Im free, I dont know what to do, and it ends up me doing nothing. Im really scared, thas life will pass and Im gonna be with nothing. And you want me to accept it???!!!

[@ADHDMastery]

Dive into the channel and explore your options. Make an action plan my friend. Seek inspiration.

[@danielpawela6637]

@@ADHDMastery When you mean channel, you mean your channel right?

[@ADHDMastery]

@@danielpawela6637 yes

[@danielpawela6637]

@@ADHDMastery Maybe you could do an interview with me?

[@gaiacarfora7814]

Thanks for this, really. I honestly think our society is somehow tailored to make us all feel like failures, in different realms...maybe because there's too much stress on a "purpose" of life seen as an extrinsic thing which is always out of reach. While this can be true for someone, for others the goal is the very same act of living, somehow honouring what we are into: the beautiful complexity of emotions, sunrises and landscapes, unconditional love, random acts of kindness...perhaps the two things can go together. I have never seen myself devouted to one single life-time career or on a single-purposed life, and sometimes it's really hard, as most people believe this is not the "proper" way to live. This opens the chapter of the rhethoric of the "wasted talents" ..that casts a spell of bitterness on many people's life. Maybe we are overrating "talent" as a society.

[@chansonpapillon]

You wrote this comment two years ago, but it resonates so much - thank you for writing it! It made me think of a reddit thread yesterday about dating. There seemed to be a consensus about wanting someone who has 'ambition'. One person said that he didn't care what job a partner does, and used the example of a barista (implying that it's a lowly job). He then caveated that although he'd be more than happy to date a barista, he'd only want one who had ambitions to one day own their own coffee shop. So in fact, he wouldn't actually be happy dating a barista, he wants an aspiring entrepreneur! This work ambition thing to strive strive strive just doesn't compute in my head. My ambition is to live like exactly what you said in your comment. Thanks again.

[@ritasjourney]

We're alone together LOL. Good video. I relate to all

[@KarriSimone]

I always feel like I've failed myself and others.

[@Specialist01]

I love this, and I feel the same way. Keep it up man, thank you for continuing on 🙂

[@martincabraleizaguirre6512]

Thank you very much! I have ADHD and a frustrating experience today and it really helps to not feel alone in this struggles. Thank you man

[@JevVan]

Done is better than perfect!

[@amandabooze5670]

You truly couldn't have posted this at a better time. I feel so lost trying to "choose" a career path knowing full well that my interest and drive for most jobs wanes within the first 2 years of learning it. I feel pressure from my family (and myself if I'm honest) to pick something and stick with it because there is not just one thing I desire to do forever for a source of income. I am trying to hone in on my hobbies for potential side hustles in hopes that it'll scratch the itch of having variety. Love your content! It makes this fellow late-bloomer introvert feel more understood and less alone 🙂

[@pauljakeman]

Hope things work out ok, I’m the same in “normal” jobs too. I either loose interest or can’t keep up with what they demand.

[@suzanna_]

This hit home. Indecisiveness is what kept me from evolving in my carreer, I've changed 3 or 4 times already. Each time I get bored within 2 years, then picking a new carreer path is a nightmare. So far on my list : coach, psychologist (meaning going back to university for 5 years, daunting), finance, or financial markets, that's just the few of my interests 😅.

[@MrPiranBlyth]

Glad to see you posting

[@paulj.thaddaios]

Brov! I identify with you completely! Thanks for your quality videos!

[@rayoflightcanada]

loved everything you said, same here , been 20 years here in Toronto and still in the bottom ranks at the bank where I work, changed banks 5 times, with my ADD so hard to achieve anything , trying Vyvanse now is horror , it feels good for the first 2 days then I cant handle it , it becomes overwhelming, cant sleep and some sense of paranoia , do I need this shit, maybe I like you said in your previous videos , just stay without those drugs , after all its a amphetamine salts - the stuff they smoke on the street , its dangerous, Canada is becoming so expensive to live , you cant even get your own place , paying almost $1000 CAN for shared room, you can just imagine the pressure and embarrassment, so many Ukrainian and Syrian refugees are struggling most are depressed and anxious , I also see how the UK is going through horror , our politician are clowns just like what Adam Curtis said on his documenters, its a sad sad situation , where to go, how to even get the minimum to live like independent adult not even comparing to anything on social media

[@graemegibbon-brooks961]

Dude. This content is amazing. I a former naval officer and entrepreneur. My first business after the navy (Dryad Maritime) was a strong success but PTSD from my time as a Mine Clearance Diving Officer in Iraq and ADHD started to unravel me. I had to crash land Dryad Maritime and started Dryad Global as a phoenix company but by this time I was so dysregulated that I couldn't function. Phil Diacon, the 'Mate' who was looking after my interests when I was sick then stole the business and is passing it off as his own. I have found, like you, that the route out of the pit of hell is to understand the psychology (The map) and then small, incremental improvements (the action) to get my life together. Great job here Stuart. I think content creator definitely is a job and you come across really well. Not to mention; you are already helping lots of people who are in a dark place. 👇

[@angietigner3340]

Thank you for sharing your tools for helping us with our self help journeys. Many people don’t realize or want to admit ( or discuss) there is something going on present, past or both that has held them back whether they know or not. Maybe due to trauma, or any number of psychological symptoms going on that interfere with daily life and what we as adults “must” deal with. I appreciate you for what you are doing, and I hope you do know how much you help educate people in doing these videos, so they are able to help themselves. This has been the absolute best way to begin being better for myself ! Thank you 😊

[@Caninehandler]

I like this guy

[@DAClub-uf3br]

Prior to 2019 i was very successful but an alcoholic. I quit drinking and now i have no drive, or direction and have lost my creative abilities. The idea of starting over is a non starter as it took me 16 years in the industry to get where i was. That was 16 years of working constantly, using every free moment to get ahead. I can't do that anymore.

[@oeffleur5840]

i have never related to a video more in my life

[@lexarey9479]

Hi. I'm about to make a huge career change and I'm super excited.. but petrified at the same time. I'm excited because I really feel like I've outgrown the career that I'm currently in. But at the same time I am petrified because its risky financially but could really pay off. ... but I'm scared I might get bored again and end up right back where I started. 🙈

[@arturkohut]

All that I was thinking throughout all of this video is how good this mustard polo looks on him and will it look the same good on me. Do I have ADHD haha?

[@mercygrace.]

I ended up at 3 stores looking for which chocolate I wanted and 15 minutes in one aisle 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@jennung7368]

Thank you Stuart for this video, It really helped me put things in perspective and not compare my journey with my peers ❤️

[@malkulaas6380]

Thank you for the interesting topic! Unfortunately I have struggles keeping listening to you, because you change the camera ankles so much that I feel more like a fly, flying around you than somone you would talk too. That also make my adhd a little crazy 😅 I can't focus like this

[@ADHDMastery]

I would have thought that the changing camera angles would actually keep people engaged, that's why I did it! 🙈

[@jord74]

I know this is off topic kinda, but I was diagnosed with adhd today after being a looooong waiting list for over a year and a half😂 It’s been an overwhelming but very relieving day. Been following you and “HOW TO ADHD” for over a year, and wanted to say thanks for the coping strategies! OT: Great video and I can relate to this so much, it’s also quite motivating in a way👍

[@karlb4225]

Proud of you man. I really relate to your story.

[@myadhdjourney]

Yes, yes, yes to all of this! I always feel like an underachiever and really dislike my job career. :( Persevere!

[@MrProbeNWatch]

Jordan Peterson said it best in my opinion and i can't quote it word for word but he basically says: 'if you're going to be a failure at least fail with a purpose then just waste away' if anyone knows the correct quote pls correct me

[@KVI580]

Same man, late bloomer here, 100% agree on indeciveness and having low dopamine, it made me lose my ambition and competitiveness in career and relationship, i always lose attention and focus and get instant pleasure by cheap dopamine and end the day, now im clueless about life what should i do

[@universaltruth2025]

Oh glad to see you back online! I love your videos 💛

[@animeshkumar1684]

Ya, u should be content creator full time. Your vids are always very helpful

[@pragyanr.c9477]

I like your haircut 🤙🏼🤙🏼

[@goo4450]

I like what you said about not forcing yourself into a story that's not really you.

[@keerthana9516]

This video makes me feel so much better, thank you for this : )

[@FeralWorker]

4:50 Haha! You played it so much sadder than necessary for a comedy moment. Got me good

[@Lauren_R_Arts]

Thank you for this. It definitely helped me

[@shasmeenraabia1159]

Omg I’ve been telling my self this exact same things

[@danherrick5785]

Great stuff man - Learn that you have to walk your own road and accept that - ignore everything/everyone elses opinions if you have to... because their not walking your path!

[@user-pw3tr1xg2x]

So true Dan.

[@introvertedlyguided]

Thank you so much I needed this it helps a lot being undiagnosed with adhd it has been a struggle with me just going back to college your videos has help me a lot with not feeling alone.

[@Ellen-tk6lc]

Excellent raw video of you just telling it like it is, being humble and honest. If you’re not already an ADHD Coach, you may want to check into that as a side gig that would turn into full time. Your approach (of just being yourself) sells itself. ☀️

[@ADHDMastery]

Ironic that you say that, I used to run a coaching business through this channel but took it all down as it became a chore to me.

[@Ellen-tk6lc]

I don’t know what it takes to run the business of it, maybe you were trying too hard too “sell” it. Believe it or not, you are coaching all of us right now. In this video, you made me feel like it was ok to be me (and not alone) in this ADHD ride. Food for thought anyways, I think you will find that people reach out to you for coaching without you having to even work at it. Keep up the awesome work.

[@joanmejer3126]

Love your work, and especially the picasso in the background😊❤

[@ADHDMastery]

It's actually a Dali 😁

[@g.g.harrison5949]

You let me hug you till we fell better and gets drinks after 😂

[@ritasjourney]

I think it's good to do kind of what you want and make even not so great money but at some point it's probably good to figure out the money part because you won't always be able to work

[@ADHDMastery]

True!

[@madisonla1803]

I really needed to hear this today x

[@popsal7346]

When writing the story of your life dont allow someone else to hold the pen.

[@seaandstone1]

I really needed this video. Thank you.

[@Jaredthedude1]

Did you get anywhere with crypto?

[@tcgrady2000]

Excellent video. I feel like this was a personal pep talk made just for me!

[@stonerslothh5124]

Thank you for sharing your experience, it's really helps and creates hope for me, really appreciate it Luv from Russia

[@rajhussain6982]

Excellent, great video

[@KreatedbyKrause]

Thank you. I needed this.

[@SuperHelenaCardoso]

Amazing content 👌🏼

[@UughPeople]

Thank you for this!

[@user-ju6zx3rm8d]

well said, especially about the media

[@christiancruz6489]

Nice. thanks man!

[@BloodyScythe666]

thank you for the video. while I didn't need a motivational speech, I really like the way you paraphrased what I was doing unconsciously. really like your vocabulary and your way of thinking

[@TolaRat]

Bro you’re a superb video producer and editor. Very creative. Effective. We have the creative brain that the normies say they want while they criticize us. Stick with it! Resiliently!

[@Gandalf_the_quantum_G]

The thing with that is not, that other people think of you in terms of a failure, but you yourself think that, because if you stand in front of people and you spread winning energy, nobody will think that. Just if you yourself will think you're a failure, other people will think that. Otherwise just toxic people will think that - and who gives a damn about toxic people. From my experience mostly people (including myself in former times), which have this chronic low self esteem and feel like they're worthless and a failure, they do often got this believe from their family system, which gave it to them. Mostly its covert and hidden, but no human is born and the baby will sit down and say: well, I decide to feel like a failure the rest of my life. Nah, it's often the parents and the whole family system, which do that. So I didn't like this video, because it's so full of shame and insecurity, which doesn't belong there. It feels wrong to see someone struggling so heavily with himself while he is a friendly and good guy and has no reason to treat himself like this. It makes me feel like I'm part of something wrong, because if I say: hey, you'll get it, it's all good, go for it - I'd accept his believe of being a failure (or to feel like one), which is wrong in the first place.

[@k9wolfchiconnection427]

You are awesome. I have always followed you since my diagnosis of innatentive and hyperactive ADHD

[@nikkitahill4767]

Love it! Just what i needed to hear thank you Stuart 😊💕

[@koenpauwels98]

In my opinion you're the best in describing adhd stuff. It's not some basic let's try fidget toys Channel which i appreciate :-)

[@thaddelicious852]

At the point in my life where I’m gonna’ start feeling bad if I don’t start doing some cool shit. I’m 20, so I have some time left until I feel incredibly unsatisfied, but I’d rather achieve my goals before rather than later

[@drinksomewater1454]

I love your videos

[@paulmacnab8138]

This resonates with me, I'm thankful to have stumbled across your content today. 🙏

[@floormugge8445]

420 likes. nice

[@kevinsullivan8130]

Welcome back 🙏

[@mablebeel1619]

Glad to see you're getting more confident with playing around creatively these videos! Very helpful and interesting vid, many thanks

[@martinvansanten4417]

Making a comeback was definitely the best that you could do. I loved your video, super relatable.

[@marthelea]

I really needed to hear this today. Thank you 💙

[@strikemasterice2004]

Thanks man...

[@Boro_MuayThai]

I’m 18 and I’m going through this feeling right now, I’ve been struggling with anxiety and depression since my early days of school and havent been able to take the opportunities a lot of my school friends did because of those problems, it gets me down because everyone else has a job and has their money and their lovely lifestyle and i feel like a let down, to myself and my family. I dont have a job when at 18 its like im expected to have one but one of the main issues is i live in a sea side town where there arent too many good jobs around and if im stuck doing something i hate its just gunna make my life hell, I aspire to pursue my passion for boxing but im constantly scared about the future and whether im gunna make it in life or end up being the homeless disappointment i don’t really know why im leaving this comment just thought id share and maybe get some kind of advice from watching the vid