Richard Grannon Podcast Episode 1 How To Heal From Narcissistic Abuse w Matt Phifer

I misspelled Matts surname twice, my God... its Matt Phifer of mattphifercoac...!

[@carolbearce5318]

I was done 10 years before I left,. I taught healthy relationships in public schools & knew I had to work on myself. At that point I felt nothing but contempt for my partner & I rarely told him what I thought because it didn’t matter. It’s a egotistic to think you can rescue people from themselves. That’s on them. I left to find my authentic self. It’s still quite a journey.Thanks for this chat!

[@cupsoflove1245]

💙

[@NW-dl3bb]

Begun healing the MOMENT you defined the NARCISSIST behaviors. I realized my complicity in both roles. Changing my behaviors

[@cor3944]

It would be better to concentrate how the MANIPULATION works what makes you “complicit”. Don’t feel guilty about your neediness of love and your ability of forgiveness.

[@NW-dl3bb]

@@cor3944 THANKS for reply.. My emphasis when I use the word complicity was regarding some traits that I possessed

[@lorijane1973]

I am so glad someone is talking about the link between emotional abuse and adult ADHD. I was diagnosed just over a year ago; so much of my life would have been different had I not been misdiagnosed as depressed during my marriage. I am learning so much about the whys of so many of my co-dependent tendencies and responses to being gaslighted.

[@Whitenoise541]

Learning about it all yourself is good isn’t it. It helps you realise its not all your fault and that you can come back from it all ?

[@loriallen9237]

Dit-to

[@Adara11.11]

LJ O_B I also had the same experience. Life is so much clearer since diagnosed & better boundaries set !

[@deborahbulthe]

thank you I always suspected the link adhd and the upbringing

[@Adara11.11]

@@deborahbulthe agree, so glad Matt explained this to us 🙏🏼

[@WyomingASMR]

Working on yourself is a threat to them. They want you to have a problem so they can point blame at you. Working on yourself is the biggest threat they have ever felt.

[@mattdonlan7745]

Absolutely. The second biggest threat is telling them they need to work on themselves. A relationship takes two, but they'll usually claim there's nothing wrong with them and it's all you.

[@martyrose]

Ignoring them really takes it's toll too.

[@opposingshore9322]

@@martyrose no doubt, but it’s a toll worth paying for the freedom & peace it eventually provides.

[@martyrose]

@@opposingshore9322 I agree. I meant it takes a toll on the fragile little narc ego. Drives them crazy to not be adored and worshipped. Yes. There's peace and quiet to be gained from it because if lucky, the narcs response will eventually be the silent treatment. This covert narc is much too weak to ever approach anyone in a civil, adult manner to try to find out what the problem is. He has wait until he's in a full blown rage to fire it in your face.

[@opposingshore9322]

@@martyrose ah okay, got ya. I’m not sure about that, I think in many situations a narcissistic person doesn’t care at all if you ignore them bc they are on to a new supply and can easily place you in a narrative that makes them glad to be rid of you. but…who the fuck cares?! I know that cutting out an abusive person completely from one’s life is a very wise, self-saving decision.

[@RICHARDGRANNON]

I misspelled Matts surname twice, my God... its Matt Phifer of mattphifercoaching.com!

[@BlackJim]

Shit happens bro 🤙🏻

[@Lisa-cp5xl]

Says "sight can't be reached":(

[@marcytorres7]

@@Lisa-cp5xl try again, because I clicked on the linked took me straight there ♥♥♥♥

[@Lisa-cp5xl]

@@marcytorres7 Thanks Ela!!

[@lzcrazyzl6443]

Narcissistic abuse won't really understand it unless you have lived it. God bless

[@DianeCarroll111]

Cannot appreciate highly enough how Richard asked each question and listened to the answer thoroughly before adding his thoughts. Too many people just sit and cannot wait for their turn to speak and they then demonstrate that they are doing this by the way they verbalise their thoughts, it is excruciating to watch. Thank you both for this video.

[@alyajewellery]

I don’t smear because I don’t need to. They are eternally cursed. I don’t wrestle with pigs. I need to work on my own wounds to heal what made me vulnerable to them in the first place. I suspected I had ADHD when I went back to school last year.

[@blueknight8133]

I have ADHD to. You are Not alone it is really hard especially as a girl.

[@alyajewellery]

@@blueknight8133my life stagnated until 2020. I’m back studying at the age of 37 now. I have to follow my dream! Luckily the relationship wasn’t a long one and it made me aware of my core wounds. Therapy and studying in a new city are doing wonders for me.

[@blueknight8133]

@Lulu Saad Good 4 you. I'm currently not in the best of ways atm. My self-esteem is low. I don't know if I see a happy route forward in my life. But I guess it's never to late. Maybe, I should start a degree course or something. I dunno. Something needs to change because I am not in a good place right now mentally.

[@hopeandheartsloveandfreedo3580]

@@blueknight8133 Can relate how do can you move forward when you are the bad one, but everyone else wants you to be when you knew before you were the good person. Self doubt can be such an enemy

[@texuztweety]

I had a fantastic online therapy session with Matt earlier this year, he is fantastic and also a fellow Texan 🤠👍💯

[@kimalexander8276]

Brilliant interview, thank you Richard and Matt 🌹

[@Lily59265]

TY, You have to do your own individual healing. You do have to learn your triggers. Self love is so important. Self awareness comes over time as you continue to heal. Your body speaks volumes in toxic environments. If you don't heed the warning ⚠️ messages, your body will give you more and more symptoms that are untraceable like extreme physical pain, weight gain/loss, etc. Healing YOURSELF is the beginning of the healing of intergenerational trauma patterns. Namaste 🕊️Peace🤸Shalom 🐵

[@lifeadventure6334]

Wonderful discussion. On "leaning into the fear," while this is absolutely true, for some people, saying no meant total annihilation (self or physical). A person that fears annihilation (not just rejection and abandonment) will have a hard time setting boundaries. I liked when it's framed as "abandonment terror" or "fear of annihilation." Seems more fitting in some instances.

[@joinlife1112]

I love what Matt says about distrust of other ppl meaning that 'people pleasers' never learned to set proper boundaries ourselves... That is a powerful and empowering insight...

[@darlaclark4342]

Richard & Matt thank you SO much for both of your Wisdom, You both are so refreshing & What real Men look like ! Their needs to be more men waking up to being Real , Love 💜your channel Richard !!

[@David-eu1ms]

Distance makes the heart grow fonder, limiting our accessibility is healthy for these types of relationships.

[@opposingshore9322]

Super interesting to hear Matt talk about the connection between ADHD and codependency/abuse victims. Hadn’t heard that before and really hit home for me- makes a lot of sense. Going to explore that…

[@allaboardthefreedomtrain6158]

I've been curious about this for a few months now. Especially the executive dysfunction part of it because it's part of both PTSD and ADHD

[@tptarh]

Would be even more interesting to hear about connection between ADHD and narcissism. It’s an interesting idea that ADHD folk are easier controlled by the narcissist due to memory inconsistency but ADHD also overlap with NPD a lot. Which basically make the relationship dynamic probably looking more like an NPD-NPD match where it’s difficult to tell who exactly is the winner today and who’s the abuser 😅

[@knowledgeseeker2776]

Great presentation. Thank you both. When Matt mentioned the body putting you on notice… I nearly fell out of my chair. I was diagnosed with chronic hives. At one point I had hives for nine months. I went to several doctors trying to figure out what was causing full body welts and bumps. I thought I would loose my mind, the itching was horrific. The meds that I took caused severe swelling and bloating. My primary care physician concluded that my hives were stress induced. In my naivety I told her that I had no stress. Looking back now my marriage was disintegrating and I was in total denial. My body knew before my mind did.

[@alisongreen7576]

that's really interesting- I have a friend who has a long history of mental illness and I think it's all cPTSD - he was sexually abused as a teenager and has a mother who is utterly emotionally shut down - he has had multiple psychotic episodes and is on loads of psychiatric medication and recently developed hives- diagnosed as "idiopathic urticaria" by his doctors. I only heard about it last week and I immediately thought "this is caused by stress" but then I thought "is that even possible?"- thanks for showing me that it is possible! He has been prescribed yet more sedatives and so has been told not to drive- I think he is over-medicated and can't "process" because he is numb- but every time they reduce his meds he goes psychotic. I do think his body is trying to tell him things his mind is blocking out- thanks for confirming I might not be crazy for thinking that!

[@dwatcha7239]

I follow male "life coaches" because it gives me a sense, a reminder, that not all men are like the ones I've known.

[@nyahhbinghi]

duhhhh :)

[@altspecs342]

This is excellent Richard and Matthew Absolutely on target.

[@hawkarae]

Brilliant decision to have this conversation Richard! This man will free many from self imposed suffering and failure.

[@darlaclark4342]

As a Empath and a Narcissistic mother , Oh my !! The Struggle is REAL!! 💜

[@ritevibe]

you mean you are both??

[@darlaclark4342]

@@ritevibe Lol , what I meant to say is I am an Empath and my mother is a Narcissist☀️

[@zubieM]

This is exactly what I am too- Empath of Narc mother with 2 narc exes- lots of healing to do! 29 days no contact ❤️

[@TenaciouslyTina]

This conversation is what is needed!

[@blackmamba4729]

Fantastic conversation. Got a lot from this discussion. Mostly if you are in a narc relationship both people need work! Realisation . Even though it’s been said a thousand times. That particular sentence says it all really doesn’t it. Co-deps need to take responsibility for themselves. 😌👍🏻🤟🏻

[@audhildwaale4189]

children and narsistic mother

[@F_a_i_t_h-AMEN]

My husband was a narcissistic with psychotic disorder and he killed himself 5 months ago and I found the body. I am a mess, and so so angry, I feel like his issues became mine after he selfishly killed himself. I dont even want to be around another human being again. I am just lost

[@vwbeep]

I hope you will seek out a therapist. I am so sorry for what happened.

[@bodymindsoul60]

God Bless Suz , for courage and strength. You will have clarity one day as the pain recedes and see you have a whole bright, beautiful life ahead of you minus the darkness. Best ❣️

[@blackmamba4729]

Suz you will get to a healing point. Trust yourself and your intuition. Please get some professional help. Horrendous situation to be in. Start your journey don’t let this define you. I’m routing for you. X

[@F_a_i_t_h-AMEN]

@@vwbeep thank you... I am working on therapy..to many things on my plate at once..I can only do one thing at a time..I've been alone through this whole process.. The things I've had to endure is more than most people will deal with in their entire lives.. Thank you for reaching out🙏♥️

[@F_a_i_t_h-AMEN]

@@bodymindsoul60 Thank you greatly..I dont feel very strong but I feel rage and anger..working on a therapist just so many things to face at once..its just all to much to handle.. I know I will come out of this better than I went into it but at this point i feel that peace and security are on another planet somewhere that i cant reach.. I've been blamed for his death from friends and family of his..I've been ostracized by those around me..I dont even know who I am anymore.. I cry more than I smile, I hate more than I love I'm just a mess. I've lost my sanity and struggling to find my identity.. I appreciate your words🙏💜

[@chrisfogarty9110]

Thank you for this! ❤️ it! I too am a CADC. Due to a 24 year marriage to a toxic Narc/HPD/ADHD. I too feel like I should have known better. I have had lots of shame surrounding this. I am learning to recognize my own codependency and I practice self care for the first time in my life. I’m 52 years old but it’s Never too late! I’m enrolling to get a Clinical MSW Because I am finally getting free from my toxic relationship! I have learned a lot about myself because of my toxic marriage. I’m going to use this knowledge to empower others! Thank you both for this message!

[@nicolesalter2726]

I'm so overwhelmed by the macro narcissism right now it makes the narcissists in my life seem like small potatoes. I will never surrender my self respect again. It starts there.

[@annemarie9980]

Great content with Matt..Self love the healing from toxic relationships...thanks Richard loved this new podcast💖

[@StKrane]

Thank you both for this! Men really miss out because of this fear of appearing weak when talking and sharing about hurtful experiences. It really makes me sad to think that so many people kind of dehumanize themselves that way and don't get the experience of being heard and validated that comes with sharing these things. Sooooo, setting an example might be an important move towards better mental health for all men. Win-win.

[@rosablu5936]

Once we truly understand that a manipulator is playing with our fears of not being validated or of being rejected, we are out of the game.

[@huldaherna3935]

Space cadet, that is the term...just had this happening in a conversation. Where old things are being discussed where I have absolutely no memory of even being there. And it feels awful. And the stress of not being able to even partake in the discussion about it. I am always realizing more and more how bad state I was in. I was more or less in high vigilant state dissociation and lost on my own persona. And still today having problems with not switching into that response mode and walking on eggshells. Even at work. What he says about the body is very true. I was always sick and not only on internal screaming but external as well at one point. I literally got anxiety feeling listening to this discussion thinking back on my life and how my behaviour affected everything around me. Heavy stuff. Thank you for this discussion.

[@maryoconnor2596]

His warmth, comes through very much so. 👆

[@Perrys808]

This was a fabulous and truly enlightening discussion Richard , I shall now be following Matt as well . Toxic relationships cease to exist as genuine moral self love develops .

[@TheMamasilver]

Both of you together! Fabulous 👏🏻

[@suzannax]

It's annoying that when men speak out they're called weak or simp. It's never seen as the fault of the narcissist.

[@gtharo]

Thank you for saying that! 🙏

[@Panthersigma]

Its beyond annoying, it is rare that an abused man is heard much less believed, if he is believed it is most likely he is told to "just get over it"

[@geraldojimenez1384]

I being raise in a foster home for 11 years by two Narcissist parents can relate. I have been recently been diagnosed with adhd that I never knew about. In High School, I had 3.78 GPA and also Graduated with Honors. At first glance you think okay normal kid, but as soon as I got to college; I got destroyed. I had no idea what was wrong with me and why I couldn't reach the pinnacle my potential like before (why was I struggling in school so much ? And why I couldn't focus as well as I use too ? ). Overall I felt as if I was deteriorating cognitively for some odd reason. Developmental trauma is real and one of the many symptoms is Adhd. Once I saw that. I was really spectacle at my findings, So I let the professionals look into it and went to see a psychiatrist for further evaluation and what do you know they said ADHD. Real Talk Richard your content is incredible and you speak to the souls of those who couldn't defend themselves and didn't know any better. You do an incredible job in educating your audience in various topics from co-dependency expanding to gaslighting and disassociation. My sincere thanks

[@lindarosebuchanan1650]

I have always respected you Mr. Grannon. Bringing this gentleman on is so precious, so respectful. I hope this is ok. Fly Nubian Queen give vital info t us that have to survive racism and other toxic issues. Thank you so much.

[@bodymindsoul60]

Thanks so much Ritchie, excellent conversation 🙏🧜‍♀️✌️

[@christinejohnson7760]

Gabor Mate believes there is causal connection between ADD and childhood trauma. He wrote a book on it called Scattered. I haven’t read it but found his other work very powerful. If ADD at least partly comes from childhood trauma would explain the connection with getting in anusive relationships.

[@christinemcginnis8827]

Gabor Mate is a Hungarian Canadian MD with brilliant insight into inter generational/childhood trauma as a survivor, therapist and a healer…

[@annidee]

Thanks, gentlemen! 🙏🏻

[@janettrimble2950]

Great interview. Great questions and well informed answers. Loved it.

[@lesliemorgan3091]

This was fantastic. Thankyou Richard, thankyou Matt!

[@toridinnison8002]

Thank you so much Richard for these videos. You’re incredible and I must say your accent makes for easy listening 😊

[@user-sp5vo3kk8g]

Loved this so much! Thank you both! 🙏

[@margogarrison2526]

So enlightening. Great, great conversation!

[@EVOLr]

Spot on!!! Bottom line “it starts with U , it ends with U. No need to place blame with Q or R or even V or W or any other letter. If ya know ya damaged, just keep that focus on U, and do everything ya need to help U so ya could be happy being in or out of that alpha bet or any other system comfortably , good or bad. Just having the awareness of U is just the beginning. Authenticity is that inside job that’s dying to come out and be ok no matter what, however; the U needs to also realize that all is fair in LUV n War .PEACE.

[@Adara11.11]

Omgosh thank you Matt for this live. I have adhd & you’ve explained a lot as to why I was so easily gaslit & sensitive to criticism etc. I didn’t get diagnosed until I was 42 years & I seemed to attract a lot of narcissistic people. I’d also question a lot of stuff & feel guilty for things I didn’t actually do. Im no means perfect I made mistakes for sure. A weight got lifted when I was diagnosed although my family etc still don’t understand the symptoms of adhd. I’ve learned to sit with myself because it’s more peaceful & less stressful. Thanks both for this video. I also have felt a lot of internal Shame & so much confusion. It definitely makes you more aware of a healthy personality & an unhealthy one. Thank you 🙏🏼

[@ОльгаЦаповська]

For me nowadays its at work that the biggest narcissistic impact is produced, it is almost inevitable to have to deal with them in the office environment.

[@christinemcginnis8827]

Check out TOXIC by Melanie Pump

[@tammydietschweiler7852]

It is brutal to live with someone like this! If you see the red flags and don’t understand the mental issues behind it, you are lost! When you realize it, it’s debilitating if you’ve tried hard to work on this relationship and you know it’s time to leave or die! My husband committed suicide by hanging and I wasn’t fit to find this relationship mess! I was afraid, mourning, depressed with a 5 year old daughter suffering from mental illness which was another stressor! When is there some relief!!! Now I am very sick from it all.

[@i_am_whole_again]

Loved this video. VERY informative & helpful regarding setting boundaries and how to responde when they get angry you enforced one.

[@Levandetag]

...and anger can be a healthy way of setting boundaries, for all the abuse one no longer will take, or tolerate. So anger, also holds a key into healing oneself.

[@cor3944]

EXACTLY! You recognize them by their reaction when you insist on your (healthy) boundaries. Don’t fall for their tricks. In the beginning they even apologize and give you all the records. But that is part of their mean manipulation. They are unable to talk about their own behaviour.

[@leonellie1]

I needed to blame something to shift - then I learned I needed to love myself for real. That took a bit :)

[@My_House_]

Got adhd diagnosed as a adult after reading and learn a lot online and went for some diagnosis because no one never did in my childhood and later on no doctor talks about this when all the signs were there. But sometimes.i think it doesn't matter what it is. Neglect,.abuse ect will lead to de/disregulation so they call it adhd. One way or the other it starts with self love and regulate yourself and combine it with some healthy boundaries. I also say I miss some filter because I really have no idea who's good or bad and in a workplace that's not the best way to navigate. On my way with fortress and some more but it's a long way.

[@kaylakuchler2928]

In speaking to the body's reaction to being trapped by the conscious mind in a stressful environment.. my freaking toenails would evidently grow in REALLY thick, often causing bruising to the surrounding flesh. I had a noticeable drop in my toenails that signified when I finally left. I took a picture. It's a DRASTIC difference. But the body knows, y'all. IT KNOWS.

[@reallyaprilstarr]

MFTs in the house! ✊🏻 I also worked in court mandated substance treatment. I also liked it way more than I expected. I’m also a hard advocate for teletherapy/distance coaching. It’s not just acceptable and effective, it’s very needed. Really loved hearing from you, Matt.

[@reallyaprilstarr]

Oh. And. This was me, too. 😉 Years and years of working in behavioral health avoiding my own work. Man, you can help people so much more when you’ve healed and love yourself.

[@glennthompson1129]

First one well done!!!.😆 The start of a 'seminal' series, I am certain,and humbly optimistic towards a future with less codependence for all.🔥🎯🐙

[@i_am_whole_again]

Ive been thinking about the ADHD aspect of this discussion since I heard it the other day. Another AHA moment!! My entire life Ive had to find ways to stay focused & on task. People would joke that my brain moves @ 100mph and needs a shut off button. All thru primary & seconday school I needed lists & constant reminders to stay focused while getting my degree. It never even occured to me, before this video, that my inability to focus contributed to the psychological & emotional abuse I tolerated. When he said I was "crazy" I believed him!! Im shook-eth right now!!

[@lisaariottiart]

Wow loved this format -- more if possible please -- good stuff

[@ennuanders]

Thank you Matthew Phifer !

[@iw9338]

thank you both for a great discussion.

[@machomanic1768]

Good one Richard. A lot of truth.

[@HC-rm8wu]

This was an excellent discussion with lots of great information.

[@ChristophBadelt]

It's a very intresting question, in what kind of cultural roles a narcissist could hide, being rewarded.. Useful to think about. Great points. Umm, caring mother, strict father,.. Can't say nothing but that..

[@boostmobile9249]

Be RESERVED. CAREFUL. BE CAUSIOUS, GUARDED, USING GOOD SENSE, SENSIBLE, REASONABLE.

[@ajwhalen2]

This was awesome Thankyou Both of you fellas this has really helped to level up my awareness of what my responsibility is in the mess I helped create but most of all the great need to truly learn self-love and let go of self-hate. Where can we find this new podcast Richard please?

[@carriecoleman2450]

This conversation is really on point!! I just got a memory reminder from two years ago... I have been on a road of intentional healing for more than two years now. So far, the response to my boundaries has not been accepted well... still not sure how this will end up. But I am also one of those dreaded Bible believers, so.... all in good time. Thank you for your efforts in helping people become healthier!! I am strongly considering joining something haha I just feel so close and think perhaps a few good conversations with someone who actually "gets it" and is also a bit outside the "box" could help me tremendously with bridging some gaps....

[@marieke74]

Great insight ! 💫👍

[@leonellie1]

The added eye contact takes you to the next level

[@leonellie1]

Yes I had the yucky ones that delivered with the silent sword eye spear

[@victoryinhim9689]

So true about the link between gaslighting and ADHD

[@timsaunders8989]

Great conversation. Got loads from it. Thanks

[@amiealexander6411]

I appreciate the quote by Terri Cole Whittaker, who wrote the book, “what you think of me is none of my business” in the 80’s and a personal aquaintence. She was an Icon television minister of religious science .

[@ritevibe]

Bless Terri...how is she doing these days?

[@amiealexander6411]

@@ritevibe she is great! Spunky as ever. Living in the Pacific North West.

[@ritevibe]

@@amiealexander6411 Yes i'd heard she had moved,,,great to hear she's as Spunky as ever lol, she has always been a little pocket rocket of truth & inspiration! We were in contact too, but not so much these days :-)

[@pickle9753]

Fascinating conversation. Thank you.

[@jarrodmartin2204]

That was excellent!! Thank you both

[@1madaboutguitar]

There's alot that needs to be discovered regarding ADHD. As many people are also highly narcisstic and abusive themselves. Studies have shown a huge link between ADHD and development of psychopathy.

[@hominidaetheodosia]

After 40+ years.. of NPD abuse.. The words this Man speaks are so true and relatable.. You don’t even know you are in it, you do know something is up, you know you’re the common denominator but not how to deal with that or what to do about it.. You can’t throw them are kind of the bus because then you become them and that is a real danger I think.. sometimes I think the narcissist would like nothing more than for you to take their place so they don’t have to do it anymore.. But actually it’s worse than that they are suffering and they don’t even realise it to make that kind of level of realisation with someone who is actively destroying and dismantling your ability to function in the world is quite a leap of compassion for anyone.. It is however the only sensible realisation to make about this because anything else is dangerous really.. I think it was one of your videos where you told the secret of what is going on with them which is that they have crippling self-esteem issues well who the hell can’t relate to that?? It’s just that most people don’t find that something they need to hide they can at least in someway talk about it and maybe laugh about it there isn’t this rigid fear and need to play out previously learned patterning to protect something that doesn’t really exist in the first place.. I don’t know how to explain it but your videos are amazing Richard I wish your coaches would contact me because I could really use a bit of support with what I’m going through.. :) I get it though no one wants to help anyone who is homeless and desperate.. it’s bad Mojo and probably the perfect recipe to avoid.

[@leonellie1]

When I realized the hiding that is linked with the religion- that was a whole other level for sure

[@dwsel]

22:15 The first thought for me as well was "If you could snap your fingers and suddenly all narcissists were... GONE"

[@StealBackYourHeart]

Thank you ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[@latashiasmith114]

Thanks this helps a lot

[@jelinaross1850]

Great information thank so much for sharing God bless you both always

[@piscesaffect4175]

YAY collab!!!!!!

[@k40ren]

Wow I'm 51 1 year out of a horrific marriage with a drug addict narcissistic and I'm waiting on a diagnosis of ADHD. Love the space cadet description had a few flashbacks then. Onwards though...

[@angiespiva5304]

I do not think you have to label. I don’t see anything wrong about talking about behavior having a negative impact on your life. 💕

[@FeMiNem-Poet]

Thank you.🎉🎉

[@moodyonroody5313]

Thx for this ... had to play at 75pc speed to take it all in

[@valalyn1385]

My exes daughter is an author and renowned psychiatrist. She is my exes biggest supporter! It’s in the system as she told me years ago about his abuse of her and our children. She denies this letter she signed. I wish I had a degree in phycology. I’m in another field but mostly a mom.

[@leonellie1]

17 year childhood then 33 year marriage. Now meeting me without all that caretaking :)

[@INFJ_Sim]

You are wonderful 🙏

[@Grace.AlwaysGrace.]

Just wow. WOW! “The same part of the brain that was dealing with addiction ... deals with toxic relationships. Not just any addiction, most commonly paralleled with heroine addiction.”

[@RICHARDGRANNON]

It's mind blowing and fascinating isn't it! Thankyou for watching 😁

[@Grace.AlwaysGrace.]

Indeed. Happy Christmas to you, and all the best for Boxing Day and for the New Year.

[@leonellie1]

Traits can be learned and thought owned and then they can be unlearned and released.

[@edgreen8140]

The narcissist has the same memory issues so they confabulate- i don't remember i must have ... Narcissists also have rejection sensativity. Just like a.d.d. ( i use the old term because not everyone is hyperactive). If the person is showing entitlement, exploitation of others, lack of empathy. Genetics 60%. Agnosia doesn't help. Ross Rosenbergs "observe don't absorb " on you tube helps you take a step back an view the environment. Stops reactive abuse. You don't defend yourself no need. Consider the source of who said what about you. Guy doesn't like boundary- bye bye. Yep social media better to stay off unless you love competing with the jones's.

[@teena4rl211]

Excellent

[@darlenenewlon7332]

Wow so I have longed realize that I became a manipulator too. Trying to convince ppl it’s ok and they shud hav hope. When all along they r correct and I am not seeing. They conceded and that’s sad. I was wrong for that. It affects ppl but more importantly impairs them. So disastrous. It goes way beyond me trying to have idk whatever it was call it validation or just notice. But then what ?? How do u live with that shame upon what I already have admitting I’m a fucking victim??

[@amiealexander6411]

The notion that “women don’t realize” men won’t talk about their vulnerable boundary less-ness and victim hood is false. I have worked closely with women all my life and they count on it. Take advantage of it. Abuse it… at times. Women are savvy creatures Richard.

[@Seven_709]

"collect data" Love that!

[@xixi6462]

Catering to MY needs, not some narcissist's.

[@audrey9507]

Really good!

[@alexander.druganov]

I had to go through surgery and immense physical pain to finally escape from those toxic relationships - it's the case "when body says no" (as Gabor Mate book). So, please, get out as fast as you can and pay attention to your psychosomatic reactions.

[@maryoconnor2596]

I'm here early,.. In a sense,.. Cuppa in hand feet up and present for this video 👌🧡

[@boostmobile9249]

Lack of SELF TRUST...? TRUST Issues 🤠

[@valalyn1385]

The court mandates I give him 60 days notice . It’s the reason I have only moved when he took my family home . I built with my money and he placed a false lien . I just found out about NPD in 2015 when I got my first smart phone . He refused me o e but love bombed me and bought me one and expected two calls a day from our then small kids . It messed them up along with cuss with him. Men women - NPD is an untold epidemic!

[@ennuanders]

is there anything known about people who never or only superficially talk about their problems and have become very open because of the narcissist and how this affects your brain when misusing this opening.