RiffTrax: What Is A Map? (Full FREE Short)

[@darrenrunning5415]

This isn't about maps, it's about interior decorating. We've been had.

[@srbrant5391]

A great way to grey up your foyer.

[@jeffaltier5582]

You would think a movie called "What Is a Map" would include more stuff like maps and not spend 8 of the 10 minute movie on bedroom floor plans.

[@KairuHakubi]

I guess he really thought the concept was fuckin OUT there, and we needed to be eased into it it's only fair I guess, in a time before video games and jet aircraft, you didn't really get to see things from above to understand what they are. it might as well have been molecular models

[@MrArgus11111]

Further reinforcing that these films for classes were just a scam to get government money

[@user-os7ec4dm8x]

What are you talking about, I've just looked up the definition of 'map' and it says vague representation of little kid's bedroom including starkly drawn outlines of elderly ladies' furniture. I mean have you ever been to a map store? It's full of that shit!

[@KairuHakubi]

@@MrArgus11111 that basically describes the entire school system.

[@ian_b]

@@KairuHakubi Yes, it's not like they had buildings with more than one storey.

[@CyberKnight1]

If only we could see some kind of educational short to learn how one might set up a room....

[@kevinblount7142]

Better than one about setting up THE room…

[@thelostone6981]

Better than “how I filmed the Room”…

[@skeetsmcgrew3282]

Please no, I can't take that again

[@louisdellalucca8969]

@@kevinblount7142 oh hi children I’m your new substitute teacher

[@gl15col]

Thanks, now I'm having flashbacks about wooden blocks and where to put easels...so many easels.

[@thomaspalazzolo5902]

"What is a map? A miserable pile of sea-charts!"

[@phoenixlich]

"For what profit is it to a man if he gains the world, and loses his own soul?" -Austin 3:16 I believe

[@raphaelturtle4146]

Nice

[@natebetts9426]

"But enough geography: have at you!"

[@jeremy____5747]

This comment made my toilet start flushing counterclockwise

[@JonathanRobertAlexander]

"Your atlases are as empty as your soul. Mankind ill needs a cartographer such as you!"

[@coreyvicesassistant4403]

3:42 "Legolas, what do your elf eyes see?" "Table lay here, and a lamp. There was even...a couch..."

[@jeremy____5747]

They're taking the couches to Isengard!

[@greenranger8884]

Roflmao

[@lizishmathuser]

As a literal map maker, this was almost too much to sit through.

[@deirdre108]

A "literal" map maker versus a "figurative" one?

[@ian_b]

Is the claim that "maps are fun to draw" true, or is the film telling us lies?

[@spacenerd9499]

I work in land records and GIS. 🤣 I now how you feel!

[@Tony_Cardoza]

@@deirdre108 A hyperbolic Map maker.

[@Tony_Cardoza]

@@ian_b lol

[@tuckerbowen4626]

I gotta say, this sequel to "Setting Up A Room" just fails to capture the magic of the original

[@Gappasaurus]

I like to think that it’s actually a _prequel,_ where Betty is the older teacher as a young girl and we are witnessing the origins of her obsessive floor plan drawings and mania for setting up rooms 😅

[@daffers2345]

They need a corner for blocks!

[@shwahgamer]

@@Gappasaurus Finally, some proper lore for Setting Up a Room.

[@cannedcream]

The great thing about these informational videos is that I always walk away knowing a little bit less, and feeling a little more dead inside.

[@Zara-Bari]

Okay, but I'm seeing a lot of shapes I haven't learned to draw yet. This must be the advanced course.

[@raphaelturtle4146]

Rectangles are tricky. It looks kinda like a square but it's not. It's a little longer or something. Idk man. It's like he's making it all up as he goes.

[@dynamicsketch]

You need to watch the Drawing for Beginners series then. Rifftrax did three of those.

[@ian_b]

@@raphaelturtle4146 I did a University degree in Shapes but I never really got the whole rectangle thing.

[@Gappasaurus]

NGL, that table looks just like the flat end of a cylinder when viewed from above, so i’m a bit confused now 😵

[@raphaelturtle4146]

@@ian_b shut up, really? Very cool. I got a masters in my ABCs. But that's easy stuff. Elemeno and whatnot. I can't wrap my mind around this shapes stuff. I'm not a rocket scientist

[@dsprocks]

@3:52 - "Looks like a crime scene where all the furniture was recently murdered." - Kevin Murphy, not afraid to pull jokes out from the dark recesses of his mind.

[@PuffKitty]

.. or ass 😏

[@Northingmuch]

"Thanks robot voice," exclaims the man that voiced a robot.

[@DemonicNightmare]

The prequel to Setting Up A Room we never knew we didn't want

[@patrickf.4440]

Take yourself back to that wonder year of MCMXLIX. You are a grade schooler sitting in a classroom trying to listen to this film over the clattering sound of a 16 mm projector, which is probably louder than the narration, a film that is telling you something that your teacher could have told you about. That's old school education! Thanks for posting this. Pat, in Chicago

[@jeremy____5747]

Anything is better than pandemic Zoom school.

[@donfisherjr.2404]

Getting to watch a movie in class was the best part of school for me.

[@outtheredude]

Later on it was a video saying 'Just say NO (to drugs)' to "let the VCR do the teaching while I quietly consume a coffee with a Twinkie in the darkened room to satisfy my caffiene and sugar addictions". ;-)

[@setharnold9764]

No doubt many naps were taken and doodles were drawn during this pile of sadness.

[@Tony_Cardoza]

@@outtheredude I see your point. Twinkies and coffee ARE just like heroin and crack cocaine. The hypocrisy of these teachers!

[@kevhead1525]

Betty would go on to direct the setting up a room "short". Then, therapy.

[@cylondorado4582]

It’s funny to me when an old film explains something we take for granted nowadays. Like when Goldfinger explains to James Bond what a laser is, or when this narrator explains representing a real world object in two dimensions on paper.

[@chuckhush916]

This flick needs a dead founding father, or an androgynous singing fairy, or a talking spring. Or anything!!! PLEASE!!

[@LeCrosse]

"The big chair is in the corner" "Tears for Fears are writing songs from it" 😂

[@PuffKitty]

That went by so fast 😅

[@strawbarry7834]

Thousands of dreams were crushed that day, as little kids got home from school, eagerly planned their new bedrooms, drew up the plans, then asked Dad, who promptly said "No", and so then they cried all night.

[@EmilyTheManx]

7:05 She's essentially kept in the attic all day, considering her room doesn't have doors.

[@HylianFox3]

To be fair, the living room map didn't bother to explain what windows or doors were either despite being clearly marked.

[@QuixoteX]

@@HylianFox3 What are windows and doors?

[@DemonicNightmare]

@@QuixoteX There's probably an educational short explaining that.

[@seattlefloyd]

That's covered in the sequel "what is an escape plan?"

[@cyborgraptor1778]

5:25 "Now you don't need the real furniture." You can sit on the floor and pretend you have furniture! Also, man I miss Space Ghost C2C.

[@abitofabitofabit4404]

That was a legitimate business plan until recently.

[@Bobsheaux]

"Now, class, what did we learn from this short?" "What were we SUPPOSED to learn from this short?" "..."

[@collegeman1988]

I had an awful flashback watching this because I remember seeing this educational film in fourth grade well over 40 years ago.

[@setharnold9764]

COOKIES!

[@spacenerd9499]

🤣🤣

[@seanboggs215]

I guess sesame street didn't have much going on back in the day.

[@andyjay729]

Dang, they were still showing filmstrips from the '40s in schools in the early '80s?

[@collegeman1988]

@@andyjay729 wrong. It was about 1977, and I was in the 4th grade.

[@IdeaBox-dk5vj]

"Williams Street..." "Home of Space Ghost Coast to Coast and Aqua Teen Hunger Force!" I was actually thinking the same thing as soon as I heard that street name.

[@CookiesAndSarcasm]

Thank God, I watched those shorts about drawing shapes or I'd be totally lost!

[@EdwardClayMeow]

This short made 'Drawing For Beginners: The Square' feel fast paced and exciting.

[@deanfiora4227]

Betty grew up to be a kindergarten teacher. She specialized in setting up a room.

[@DanFloresII]

Thank you, gents, for that Williams Street reference and for naming Space Ghost: Coast to Coast and ATHF. ❤️ Beautiful work as always. PS As funny as the joke was, I really hope Mike's Google prediction never comes true. 😬

[@theoldladygamerishere384]

Everything but a door. The perfect kids room.

[@RobotoSan]

Bold idea for an educational film, posing a question about maps and then showing us how to diagram a room/town.

[@skeetsmcgrew3282]

But they didn't teach us that! They taught us room diagram theory, something I never even knew existed until to say. Apparently practical application is part 2

[@abitofabitofabit4404]

@@skeetsmcgrew3282 They're setting up "Setting Up a Room".

[@outtheredude]

This is not the Way! ;-)

[@chriswest6988]

I don't know why children need to learn to draw floor plans, but on the assumption that they do, they probably need to include doors. I know the sets and dollhouses used to film this don't have them, but given the amazing scope of a child's imagination, I have to think they could have handled "pretend this bedroom has a door you can't see."

[@ccjuju]

To be fair this is a very advanced instructional video. It goes from object permanence to central planning in a matter of minutes.

[@daveydoodle52]

Put this on a loop without the riffs and you have solid, sleep-inducing ASMR.

[@Mr1234512]

Aqua Teen made it into a Riff! I’m so happy

[@Merylstreep1949]

Betty neglected to draw the pentagram in the middle of her room , the one she used to summon the dark ones she uses to do her bidding and control the citizens of Betty's Town, a heretofore unknown sequel to Thornton Wilders Our Town

[@evenberg8499]

Whimsical 1950's education. Throw random stuff at the pupils, and see what sticks.

[@mikesilva3868]

Narrator: Theorizing that one could time travel within his own lifetime, Doctor Sam Beckett led an elite group of scientists into the desert to develop a top secret project, known as QUANTUM LEAP. Pressured to prove his theories or lose funding, Doctor Beckett, prematurely stepped into the Project Accelerator and vanished. He awoke to find himself in the past, suffering from partial amnesia and facing a mirror image that was not his own. Fortunately, contact with his own time was made through brainwave transmissions, with Al, the Project Observer, who appeared in the form of a hologram that only Doctor Beckett could see and hear. Trapped in the past, Doctor Beckett finds himself leaping from life to life, putting things right, that once went wrong and hoping each time, that his next leap will be the leap home quantum leap 1989 classic 😊

[@KorenLesthe]

Oh boy

[@mikesilva3868]

@@KorenLesthe thanks love the 1989 quantum leap tv series 😊

[@rikrob]

That plot twist with the moving couch was almost too much excitement! Now Betty, seeing as you are such the great little map drawer, do the one from "How To Setup A Room", you have 10 minutes & aren't allowed to watch the video first!

[@andyjay729]

Maybe Betty is the glasses-wearing teacher as a young adult. Hey, the times and ages kinda line up.

[@rikrob]

@@andyjay729 very good point! Mystery solved on that one. Who'd have thought she'd go onto such great things from setting up a bedroom to assisting with the organisation of a whole classroom!

[@DJHolte]

Man, I did NOT see that 2nd act twist coming when they moved the couch to the other side of the room!

[@Suetsumu]

SPOILERS!!!

[@michaelhuguet5415]

I just hope we find out if corn is grass.

[@Evil0tto]

We will never know.

[@UlshaRS]

Somethings are too great for us

[@cylondorado4582]

First you must draw a map of the farm. First imagine the farm if you were looking at it from above. Then, draw the shape of the barn. Next, draw a line around the cornfield.

[@outtheredude]

Educational movie says: "No closure for you! Moa ha ha ha!"

[@Edward-jn5pl]

Is a map grass? That's what I want to know.

[@darrinfromvault801]

It's weird all the maps say there's a Great Salt Lake in Utah, but when I go outside lately, there is only a dried up pond and a bunch of salt

[@eviljoel]

The Mormons are hiding the real lake, clearly.

[@jeremy____5747]

Barely Adequate Salt Lake

[@beebs312]

This is giving me flashbacks to my Crime Scene/Forensics classes

[@KidMetairie]

Shake hands with a map!

[@EmilyTheManx]

Ba-daw, baw-ba-da-daaa! 🎸

[@MeganKoumori]

If I were a teacher, I'd show this, sans Riff, to my students to punish them.

[@jadenova]

"Thanks robot voice," says Tom Servo.

[@evelynwilson1566]

Wow, they really thought that school age children had never seen any sort of map and were completely unfamiliar with the concept of maps😆. Like the ones on the classroom wall for instance.

[@Mr72Dolphins]

We only had 2 dimensions back then

[@TheNzFox]

I am more worried by WHY 'Ann' wants or needs a map of Betties room, are we 100% sure 'Ann' is her cousin?

[@gl15col]

Now people would be suspicious this "Ann" was actually a burglar and Bettie is really giving them the locations of all the valuables...

[@AuroDHikoshi]

Given we know where she lives and where her school is...

[@TheNzFox]

@@gl15col have to admit, that is a far more innocent scenario than what my mind went to ...

[@kingfish4575]

Loved the space ghost coast to coast reference!

[@ckok7792]

That same room again joke was pretty relatable. I appreciate that rifftrax. As someone said a joke has some truth to it. I’m glad I ain’t the only one who struggles with waking up doing the same old same old every day.

[@RedHeadKevin]

This movie sounds like it's sending coded messages to The Resistance. "The Couch is against the wall." "The Lamp stands by the Couch." "The Radio is by the wall." "The Big Chair is in the corner."

[@stephenclark6236]

Yarr. They'll never find me treasure now I've got this trick up me sleeve.

[@meowistforlife]

0:11 I see Young America and I know I am in for a time, these people decided that we needed to learn about triangles

[@tdn6457]

I'm so glad you posted this, I've been wondering what a map is all day.

[@Mr72Dolphins]

What is " a day"?

[@PaperbackWizard]

This short is 80% over before we see anything *close* to an actual map.

[@kevincherry4989]

Freaking out about missing table legs now has to be a running gag in other Riffs

[@valentine_puppy]

Good god, did you all see the size of Betty's room? That kid has some wealthy parents. Bigger than my room.

[@eviljoel]

I'm not sure she actually has parents

[@andylindsaytunes]

3 chairs!

[@FreakyRufus]

Having a giant radio set in her room did surprise me, actually. I thought it was pretty common for families to only have one in the entire house, especially those floor models.

[@HylianFox3]

3 chairs and a radio, but no toys or books. Or even a closet.

[@TheNzFox]

@@HylianFox3 or doors

[@rudylittlewolf]

7:26 - YAY for the Houston mention!! My current and home town! Betty's "drawing" of her bedroom sure looks like she has a degree in architecture! Better than some professional blueprints I've seen!

[@jackv2244]

I believe Kevin meant Ray Parker Jr. Instead of Cuba Jr. The group Raydio, this is Betty's town and we're just living in it 😂😂😂

[@dewdropfaery]

I'm glad to see that the prequel to "Setting Up a Room" is every bit as tedious.

[@HanMasho]

We don't know why Betty keeps chanting the phrase, "swingin' a chain, swingin' a chain," but it seems to make her happy, so her mother and I have decided that we won't be getting doctors involved until it becomes a problem.

[@Scribblerjohnny]

It's time for Betty's nap! Nobody wants to lose a toe!

[@elizabethhouse9454]

Floor plans & one map in 1949. Love the humor of Rifftrax (& mst3k). That's a wealthy family to have a radio in a large bedroom & one in the living room... This girl would be 84 years old now.

[@colinr0380]

As the seminal band Death Grips say in their lyrics to their Culture Shock song: "Useless information occupies every open space inside your skull / You know whats going on every day, every night every which way, you're so international"

[@PuffKitty]

I like that (of course it's crammed in my skull now 😏)

[@trentlytle7289]

To see the table, look at Table 1 and you'll find the table on the Table labeled Table 1. Take the table on Table 1 and label it Table 1, to avoid confusion.

[@Pygar2]

"'Put that down in your copybooks!"

[@Cole.....]

"First, we'll drawn lines to show where the town limits are." - so the bank knows where not to lend money for undesirables to buy homes.

[@5roundsrapid263]

6:04 That’s the first thing I thought, too! 😂

[@katthawthorne1027]

This film walked so that "How To Setup A Room" could run.

[@theshadowknows...9120]

We demand "What Is A Map?" - The Snyder Cut! NOW!!!!

[@HylianFox3]

Pretty sure the two gals from "Setting Up A Room" were forced to watch this "A Clockwork Orange" style, it would explain a lot...

[@tonytins]

Thanks. I now know how to make this room in The Sims.

[@LeshaAnn]

Forget that infamous hammer-and-sickle in the eagle's eye, what's with that cartoon monster-face in the dollhouse window? 🤣

[@lindamortensen7835]

This was torture. I hope you guys made it out alive.

[@bobriemersma]

"Robot Voice" - nice one!

[@ArtyFartyBart]

This is how Lars von Trier got the idea for Dogville

[@DouglasJohnson.]

Hahahaha!😂

[@tophers3756]

Is a map grass?

[@stephen3164]

2:42 “…and that’s how Japan’s flag design came to be, and why you should always double check the address when mailing a letter.”

[@questionablehumor2800]

. o O ("a crime scene where all the furniture was murdered"... jeeziecreezie Kevin!?! 😅)

[@ckok7792]

Oh my goodness the old style pens. They took skill to use. I remember a couple years ago a friend of mine had one and some ink, and man it was difficult and I thought i had reasonably well hand writing.

[@luisostasuc8135]

That last part reminds me of people who give directions like "it's just off of Bonneville." Like, Street, avenue, boulevard? Because one of those cuts uninterrupted through town and east or west at least 10 miles outside of town. Like, you're telling me where you are because I *don't know* where you are, ffs!

[@hawaiidispenser]

Please let there be Map Safety Tips.

[@katiekinsman4917]

As soon as the doll house furniture appeared on the screen, I was that meme of Leonardo DiCaprio pointing at the screen. I was saying "RENWAL! That's Renwal doll house furniture!" though.

[@ShannonSmith-qj4nb]

The most interesting thing in this video is the arrow.

[@undoneonion90]

"The legs cannot be seen." "WHERE DID THEY GO?!" "We'll draw a line around the table like this." "HOW DOES THAT HELP US FIND THE LEGS?!"

[@Oppeldeldoc1]

Thanks to those first two, I always want an education film on RIFFTRAX to be made by Alan Arkin, with Matthew and Adam in it.

[@jeremy____5747]

Alan Arkin, Alan Alda, Anakin Skywalker, A Man, A Plan, A Canal, Anime, Anemone, Enema, Abelone, Abelard, Ermine, Hermione, Ergo Sum

[@doslover]

Wow, I remember movies being a nice break in school but in this case... I'd rather do math.

[@sidviscious8381]

@ 3:34.... "I LOVE LAMP!"

[@DarkFleurofIra]

Boof, sometimes I wonder who needed to watch these old 1950's-60's shorts when they were first released

[@craftergin]

That was some Deep Hurting.

[@TheP3NGU1N]

The prequel to Setting up a Room

[@ckok7792]

I remember needing to same thing but on an old mac computer in middle school. I wish i knew these jokes at the time.

[@drewgeraci8434]

Wow, I'm having flashbacks to grade school when we'd watch these slow, monotone shorts. I'd nod out when the teacher wasn't looking.

[@robertwalker-smith2739]

'Is a map grass?'

[@christophercrane9540]

That Tears for Fears reference is such a good, deep, dumb cut.

[@daddydavey]

And it's sequel.. How to re-fold a f*cking map !!!

[@srbrant5391]

Now you’re ready to play D&D!

[@HylianFox3]

Needs more graph paper.

[@calsavestheworld]

Two days?! But I want a map now!

[@classiclife7204]

The filmmakers couldn't get past the whole "we gotta make them understand spatial resolution FIRST!!!" thing. It's like trying to teach someone chess, and spending hours on general geometry

[@luisreyes1963]

I surmise this was the kind of film the teacher puts on to numb the kids as she sneaks out of the classroom to grab a smoke. 🚬

[@altohippiegabber]

"What is a MAP?" With a title like that I hope this video wasn't sponsored by NAMBLA!

[@SomeOrangeCat]

Is there a map that leads me to corn, which might be grass?

[@djgizmoe]

Deeeeep hurrrrtttiiinggg. Bejezeesus H. Christ can you imagine the target audience of elementary school students excited about getting to see a movie in class and getting THIS?

[@alanbear6505]

Listening to Kevin freak out over not seeing the table legs I was thinking it will be better when he develops object permanence. Then again, given what he’s seen he’s better off without.