I have Bipolar 1 disorder (mania, psychosis and my mental health struggles of 2023)

[@andrewhuang]

I love you and I’m so proud of you

[@ThunderhawkeSMASH]

How you responded to Rob in Abbey Road studios had me tearing up. I'm training to be a therapist and you were so compassionate towards Rob. So much love between you guys!

[@maxonmendel5757]

he LOVES you too MAN

[@TamaraLynnchambers]

💜 good heavens we love you too

[@mar-z6l]

Man you're a legend, such a great supportive behaviour!

[@TrueFallacy]

♥️💙💜❤️

[@mattrassman2384]

Corey Taylor clocking Rob's manic episode immediately and being understanding and calm about it with no hesitation is like the coolest thing ever

[@tomscioscia9869]

Further proof that Corey Taylor is just a whole other level of human being.

[@MadSandman]

I was so impressed

[@CynHicks]

Not even surprising either, right. 😅

[@CynHicks]

​@@MadSandmanI mean, you have to know that Cory has experienced it.

[@AnodyneHipsterInfluencer]

Yea, I thought the same thing. Big points for Corey on that one.

[@dukeofgibbon4043]

"When you recover loudly, you save others from suffering silently." Thank you for sharing your story.

[@najrenchelf2751]

That is an incredible quote... wow!

[@Dlazybeatbox]

Amen 🙏

[@GioGlenVelarde]

True Amen

[@brandonacker]

Thank you for normalizing mental health struggles, Rob. It is brave.

[@ChrisTopherBunnell]

My rape in Iraq was covered up with a bad paper discharge in 2006. I still have serious episodes where I feel like people are out to get me, but honestly, nothing has proven me wrong. My family stopped talking to me and my brother was framed with the crime I didn't get justice for. My rapist got an honorable discharge, had multiple victims, and now works with Amtrak in L.A. I will never forgive myself for serving this country's propaganda. #FML

[@ekklesiast]

What are you talking about? What stigma ?It's "cool" to have mental health issues, everyone is bragging about it today

[@markd7933]

⁠​⁠@@ekklesiastno one brags about mental health problems. They are cries for help. Perhaps in your algorithm you see a lot of videos of people sharing their experiences but a lot of people don’t. What about those that don’t even have social media? Older generations that can’t afford care or homeless people or those with drug addictions? You think they are faking it to look cool? You are stigmatizing with your comment my guy

[@NTPercussion-k6s]

@@ekklesiast awareness ≠ trendy

[@ChrisTopherBunnell]

@@ekklesiast tell that to the 22 veterans a day that commit suicide and then ask yourself if you are lying when you give them fake gratitude on Veterans Day. You are #NotWelcomeForMyService.

[@JadeCryptOfWonders]

Finally a celebrity that isn’t Kanye West talking about their Bipolar 1 diagnosis, this is going to help a lot of people.

[@cavemann_]

​@@SavageW4A2.5 million people.

[@dan_kay]

@@cavemann_ And those are only the subscribers.

[@MellowKittyKat]

@@SavageW4A More known than you are! ;P LOL

[@nikolasb8313]

Chills. Very true

[@gmoss101]

@@MellowKittyKat I don't think they were using it as an insult, just pointing out that it's more than just "a lot"

[@alexhowe]

Why does the idea of Corey Taylor being the voice of clarity and sympathy in the middle of the barrage of messages seem super fitting and appropriate?

[@travisnorman]

Maybe because Corey Taylor also talks openly and honestly about his struggles with his mental health. Glad to see the stigma falling off. We can't get the help we need if we feel ashamed of asking for help when we need it.

[@roan9914]

Yeah Corey probably just immediately knew what was happening because of stuff he had experienced or seen first hand

[@djkommando]

Because he's been thru it all.

[@uninterestedcat8429]

Corey is irl gigachad, he's been through just about everything life could throw at him and he's still standing as strong as he is. I've absolutely nothing but respect for the man

[@Skoopyghost]

Corey Tayloe seems like a nice guy though.

[@RoomieOfficial]

Love ya man! It's clear it was tough on you, it's huge that you pulled through.

[@DennanX]

Hoppas du mår bra! Lätt att skjuta undan sina egna upplevelser.

[@huckholbrook7138]

Roomie!!!!!!!

[@playNsleep]

roomie being a real one

[@Claire-is-a-mushroom]

Dafauq are you doing here 😂

[@DJKr15py]

​@@Claire-is-a-mushroomthey've been friends for years and did some collabs ages ago

[@OscarDioses-b8o]

I remember few years back after my wife died, I was left alone with 3 kids. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with bipolar. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 4years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.

[@SubobegubUbovscuhi]

I love hearing great life changing stories like this. I want to become a mycologist because honestly mushrooms are the best form of medicine (most especially the psychedelic ones) There are so many people today used magic mushrooms to ween off of SSRI medication- its amazing! Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death buddy, lets be honest here.

[@NosbsushKsoshrgib]

Hey mates! Can you help with the source? I suffer severe anxiety, panic and depression and I usually take prescription medicine, but they don't always help. Where can I find those psilocybin mushrooms? I'm really interested in treating my mental health without Rxs. I live in Australia don't know much about these. I can't wait to get them too. Really need a reliable source. 🙏

[@DavidAlbert-d5v]

doctormaxshrooms is your guy, got all kinds of psychedelics.-:(

[@JamesJJ-y4p]

Where do I reach this dude? If possible telegram or TikTok

[@DavidAlbert-d5v]

Yes he's doctormaxshrooms. I know few friends who no longer suffer ptsd and anxiety with the help of shrooms.

[@DavidBennettPiano]

Well done for talking about this so candidly! I have suffered with mental health issues in the last year or so for the first time in my life and now having experienced that I realise how important it is to talk about mental health. ❤❤ big love to you Rob ❤❤

[@Warlock_UK]

Your channel is great and the information in there is just what my ADHD asked for!

[@kylemurphy5334]

i think this video has madf me realise that i have probably went through a very similiar situation but was never acknowledged as whatit was cheers rob, and your wife your great people

[@Peter_Sandberg]

I was the least likely person in the world to get depression - until I did. The first time can be incomprehensible and terrifying, maybe more so if you (like me) haven't experienced any trauma in your past. The second time, you know what's happening... and that doesn't necessarily make it any easier. After getting through it several times, I believe these three things about depression: 1) It can happen to anyone. 2) It is not possible to fully understand what it's like unless you've experienced it yourself. 3) It needs to be talked about until it's not considered any stranger than breaking a leg. Whatever your mental health issues are/were, if you feel at all up to talking about them on camera, I say go for it.

[@wildherring9741]

I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you're doing good now. Nevertheless, I want you to know that you are incredible teacher. You explain everything so clear it seems to be an open page of a dictionary. Your videos are so full of information! In such short time you explain such small, interesting and important things like no one did. You are wonderful. Thank you for everything, David Bennett!

[@ReoGitar]

Absolutely love your channel and really hope you're doing better and wish the best for you

[@MarySpender]

I am speechless. You have just saved lives and explained something so complicated and difficult in such a beautiful way. This is the reason I love you, and millions of people love you and yes I agree, your wife rocks. x

[@brendanm6921]

You have also made some very important videos about topics that will hit close to home and help people, Mary. Just like Rob here, it's very obvious to anyone who follows your work that you are a genuinely good human being with a good heart and the desire to help people. Much love to both you and Rob from me ❤

[@guitarsolos89]

Well said! Also your smile when you've finished a song helps people, it warms up the soul :D

[@Hahvayz]

Love your music

This video has inspired me to book my first therapy session

[@robscallon]

💪

[@mugogrog]

Congrats man! You very likely won't regret it :)

[@eperu12]

hey Im glad you took the step but as a personal advice if you feel therapy isnt for you or something along that line after one or a couple of sessions maybe it could be that the therapist in question isnt suited for you, I have learned that therapists are a little like friends: not everybody will be your close friend bc the vibe doesnt match and you need that "vibe" to be comfortable with your friends and you need it with a therapist too so if it doesnt work try with another until it works with someone...

[@johanneslaseur3876]

i really need to as well...

[@numanuma20]

You won’t regret it.

[@Zachary-dr1mu]

20:56 there’s something so heartwarming about this moment. You can see in Andrew’s face that he’s just like, “okay it’s serious talk time.” Like there’s a moment in his head where his priorities shift from trying to figure out what to do with the album and what to add, to trying to build up his best friend and give him a space to talk about what’s he’s feeling. You have a great friend in Andrew, Rob. I think you know that, but you really, REALLY do

[@OlaEnglund]

❤ Much love Rob

[@skillvendor3905]

Much love Ola

[@BennJordan]

Rob, I just wanted to thank you for making this brave video. My best friend lost his life to Bipolar 1, and even after learning everything I thought I could learn about it, your perspective immediately helped me understand things that I previously didn't. You're doing an immense service to all of us by being open about this. 🙏🏻

[@thedude7726]

Sorry for your loss brother man

[@TB-jt4nm]

Sorry to hear about your loss, Benn!

[@dreamstaticsounds]

I'm so sorry for your loss, Benn.

[@bobbychaos]

Very sorry for your loss 🙏🏽❤️‍🩹

[@SlyHikari03]

Sorry about the loss. 🙏

[@jfvecchi]

Hey man! As a doctor, I can assure you that you came with one of the most complete reports about bipolar disorder that I've ever come across in media, bravely put in a video. Hope this can raise awareness about not only bipolar disorder but also other mental health issues. Been your fan for years now, stay well, Rob!

[@RY30DM]

There’s a man who has a site called Polar Warriors I’ve watched for several years. He has bipolar, and it’s a really good channel.

[@MakeLikeAFridge]

As... not a doctor or even a person with BD, this was the best report showcase of the ailment I've seen or heard of. I absolutely adore when artists open up about this stuff, because even if it helps ONE inidivdual with BD, that is amazing and a win in my books. But I think in this case it helped de- stigmatize one of the most stigmatized disorders too. Sometimes people just need a reminder that things aren't all bad

[@petecabrina]

As a doctor maybe it should also come across as a report about the issues with medications, that seem overly prescribed in many western countries? I am not trying to dismiss the importance of Rob's experience here neither or how helpful it is for people but the issue of a medication here playing a role in this seems glossed over a bit. This classically happens all too often in medicine as well where the focus is on the persons 'disorder' or diagnosis and the impact of the medications is overlooked. If you want to educate yourself properly on the issues around psychotropic medications maybe check out Dr. Josef here on YT who covers a lot of this stuff, there was also an interesting interview with another psychiatrist a while back Mark Horowitz who had his own horrible experience, wake up call and went on to write a book about it.

[@Sagarathias]

@@petecabrina Guy from Finland here and I definitely agree with you on this one. Currently still in line waiting for a psychiatric evaluation to get diagnoses sorted out (doctor was suspecting bipolar disorder), but the first thing I was given was quetiapine and man did it fuck me up mentally and physically. Asked a few friends around about it and they told me that it gets described around here like a candy which to me just sounds plain wrong, that without even a proper diagnosis they just give you whatever and hope that it works out for you just completely dismissing side-effects in the process.

[@petecabrina]

@@Sagarathias you know what's crazy is AstraZeneca was involved in a billion dollar lawsuit for the off-labelling of quetiapine due to the damage it did to many people but regardless of that it is still off-labelled, because they decided it has other applications they could sell prescriptions for. Its an anti-psychotic which should only ever be used to help stabilise someone who is psychotic and ideally not long term, the big issue with these types of drugs is they completely mess with your natural reward system which will totally inhibit your ability to interact with the world. You should really consider taking the holistic path if you can, Wim Hof can be great for any mental health issues and is probably ideal for your climate, throw in sauna's as well which is very traditional there. The opposite to Wim Hof is buteyko too which is also good, combined with meditation. I have found you can stabilise the ups and downs of life with these kinds of practises and even recognise what is happening through self awareness and control it more. A lot of this stuff is actually more brain function/neuroplasticity than it is purely chemical, the whole 'just chemistry' model is way outdated, we can totally change ourselves and our own wiring through different practices.

[@DirtyDanny1996]

My partner and long time friend slipped into their manic episode the first month we began dating instead of being friends. To see what was going on with them, how differently they were behaving and how random things were causing them to be so excitable and also caused difficulty with sleep. They didn’t sleep for days talking about how electronics and lights were too loud or bright to be able to relax to sleep. After being in the hospital and coming back to earth, they also learned they have Bipolar 1. Now they are in a better space, we are still dating to this day. 4 years strong. I appreciate your video you put out on this topic within your life and I am extremely happy to hear you are getting things in order. ❤ Time will heal all, and stay connected with your daily levels and emotions. Stay strong! You’re not alone! ❤❤ EDIT: Not a lot of people understand how Bipolar Disorder works truly, but you did such a fantastic job explaining what you feel and think of.

[@1999Fabion]

Corey Tailor immediately identifying it as mania and trying to talk you through it almost made me tear up.

[@milesedgeworth132]

Those clips of you making faces and sighing during the filming really struck me. Being around people and things you like but not being able to enjoy any of it. Sighing from the mental exhaustion of having to exist. In that state, just being alive saps your mental strength. I'm glad you managed to get back to 90%.

[@TannerGr8rix]

Seeing that was really relatable to my struggles with ADHD - bouncing between the pseudo-euphoria of being hyperactive and/or hyperfixated on a task/project and the sudden loss of energy and willpower as soon as my focus shifts. Functioning at 110%* feels great until your body realizes that the tank is empty and crashes - and it feels almost worse to be surrounded by other people who NOTICE the shift.

[@getfucked3559]

Sounds like a normal day to me

[@abbey2k1]

@@TannerGr8rix i hate that i relate to this on a deep level. that describes my life for the last like, 10 years.

[@cosmostardust5624]

@@abbey2k1same

[@dragonhed123]

Yeah I rember during the abby road videos something was off and the comments talked about it, I'm glad he's oppend up and is getting help he deserves feels my heart with joy.

[@JoshTurnerGuitar]

Man, it’s huge you sharing this. Not just for musicians but for all the people who resonate, especially those in the low place. Thank you.

[@PowMusic]

I really love the self-love you show here - not wallowing in too much guilt or shame, but forgiving yourself, and understanding that these are moments in time. You're an awesome creator - I show your "The E Song" video to my students all the time, to show how much you can do with just rhythm/timbre/octaves/arranging! Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing this!

[@PutingPinoy]

I had a pretty intense psychosis and lost all sorts of things. I hung out with a lot of homeless people. My phone was stolen, my laptop was almost stolen, my Martin, my Fender Strat and a 400 watt Yamaha PA. My marriage was going through a really rough time. Had the mania, had the grandiosity. I could relate to this. Glad ya made it through, Rob! That was 2023, too.

[@1-eye-willy]

as a bipolar man and ex homeless person, you deserved to have all your shit stolen for hanging out with people like us in the first place. bet you wont do that shit again will you?

[@takes9386]

I hope 2024 is going much better for you.

[@bryanbryan6108]

Yeah meth addiction is rough

[@PutingPinoy]

@@bryanbryan6108 wasn’t meth. Bipolar and too much weed. It took me a while to get it figured out. People took advantage of my generous nature.

[@PutingPinoy]

@@takes9386 I appreciate you.

[@jandmharper]

Dude, I about cried when you talked about how much your wife supported you. I had a major health issue from mold poisoning from the house we were renting when my wife and I first got married. I couldn't work for about a year. She stuck with me. Having that kind of love and support when you feel so worthless... there's no replacement for it.

[@kaiserruhsam]

you guys have better wives than I did 💀 cherish her

[@EliPop]

Dude, I didn't realize a lot of my issues was from mold. Lately I have been feeling SIGNIFICANTLY better. Glad your wife stuck with you and glad you are sharing about your mold exposure!

[@theabactor9561]

Mold sickness took me out for like 2 years straught. Was super brutal. Hope you're feeling better.

[@harrypottah8889]

must be nice being loved ❤

[@zacksguitarhacks6390]

I dealt with black mold for a few years, never dealing with it again. I'll live in a car before I live with that again.

[@tonyvanderzanden]

As a father with a daughter struggling with mental health, I truly appreciate this video. Thanks you. Keep on going brother.

[@Demirci-g9]

I struggle to maintain relationships due to erratic behavior.

[@chaemchoiaromdee2229]

Microdosing psilocybin improved my mood stability and focus.

[@Ottilie-r5z]

Mushrooms neuroplasticity effects helped stabilize my mood.

[@Tylerze]

Did you use a specific protocol or dosage?

[@emmabless6647]

ᵀⁱᵏᵗᵒᵏ

[@Ggvunk]

He also offer varieties of mushroom products, including different strains and forms.

[@wushupork2]

The "I'm a burden on everyone" is so real, and so palpable, that it's almost impossible to get out from under. It's all encompassing and nothing else matters. The shame is just unbearable

[@dadams106]

an issue ive delved into with this method of thinking is that, it digs itself deeper. You're depressed, you think no one cares, or you are a burden to them. This causes a very good portion of people to lead away from you, because no one wants to be near a sad person (itll make them sad too) so you think "ohh if I am not near them they are happier, I should go further away". But then that leads to them thinking you just dont want to be around them either, so they get further away. which loops and loops...

[@noodletribunal9793]

its the worst

[@FREAKBAiT]

WE'RE HERE FOR YA ROB!

[@Joemcncheese]

Thank you Freakbait

[@adriduw4434]

Today's mission: Check on your friend

[@ZytrikX]

thank you freakbait

[@SnufflySpy]

True that

[@Isaacthemaniac]

huge freakbait W for being a good person

[@adke3696]

21:00 the way Andrew Notices Rob's mood and immediatly drops the papers and gives him the attention and support he needs it's just hearthwarming. That's what Best Friends do.

[@0xFEEDC0DE]

I have a feeling that if we could score emotional intelligence, Andrew would be off the chart.

[@HenryIsSincerelyStoked]

I was nervous clicking this video. As a person also diagnosed with type 1 bipolar, I was relieved as soon as you started talking about the manic cycle so candidly. The "rambly messages" bit hit home. I'm on the bus on my way to see my social worker and get my medication for the month right now. Will be showing my case worker this video and finishing the rest afterwards. Very well done sir.

[@EricSartor]

The way he fidgeted in that one shot where he's trying to play that guitar riff but he messes up...I know how those fidgets feel. That feeling of "being inside my body/mind is unbearable right now", it's like trying to squirm out of yourself. I'm so glad he made this video, this is what people need to hear. Mental health IS physical health. It's chemicals, it's your brain, it's the same thing as any other ailment, and there are solutions and strategies to deal with this stuff, you just have to realize that, and realize that you can't "just suck it up", and look for help. Thank you Rob.

[@-siranzalot-]

Agree with you Assessment but I'd want to add that it is much harder to realize what exactly is wrong in our brain then most other things that happen to our bodies. The first tricky thing is to realize something IS wrong and then - because many mental issues keep you from correct reasoning and / or following through on reasoning. I've been in and still am in a very taxing battle with Depression over the course of the last year only to find out halfway "through" that I also have ADHD and that acted as a strong catalyst for falling into that very depression. It's not as easy as submitting a blood sample or something and checking for any markers but involves a lot of self reflection and therapy in a state in which these things are rather... uncomfortable to say the least. I hope the Stigma around these issues will continue to be chipped away over time so that more people get a chance for a life that doesn't feel miserable while many around us don't have any Clue why we act weird and that we don't do it out of our own free will.

[@sjeppertje5462]

Very well put! I experienced this a lot when I was in a deep depression and I never knew what it was called or how to word it. Its actually called a "Psychache", I learned about it while studying Psychology.

[@littlefrank90]

when his wife turned off the camera and said "look at me" ffffuuuuuk I felt that, I was seing it in his eyes, if you've been there you know what he was feeling. Big hugs Rob.

[@kevinhyde9671]

fr that part hurt my soul

[@WarttHog]

Same. I cried. Then I cried again reading this comment. :')

[@AndyGneiss]

@@WarttHog Stop predicting my future but now present. 😿 but also ❤ and warm feelings.

[@WarttHog]

@@AndyGneiss ❤️

[@sebastiankanayuk6581]

You have helped me cope with my father's passing ten years ago with your song Anchor, Take care!

[@mattg]

You will always persist! You're a strong dude. Im glad its looking up for you.

[@MarcelVos]

These are the things you often don't see. We just see you upload videos and if you don't upload for a while or something changes we might speculate but most likely won't guess the correct reason unless you tell us. Thank you for making this video and being open about the struggles that are invisible to the audience.

[@slikwolf]

a emotional roller coaster ride of life

[@escthedark3709]

Yeah, I wasn't expecting this at all but I think it's helpful for people to know about and understand this sort of thing. No doubt a lot of people will recall this video while going through something similar and be able to recognize the need for help sooner. Having never experienced anything like this or known anyone who has been through it, I have to say that Bipolar 1 looks too intense for me.

[@quinnashter]

@@slikwolf oh my. not the rollercoaster joke

[@PlatinumEagleStudios]

Marcel Vos Comment 1 looks too intense for me!

[@slikwolf]

@@quinnashter i saw his comment and immediately thought of that

[@laurenbabic]

we love you Rob 🖤

[@BenEller]

Dude, I'm so proud of you for sharing your journey. More people need to know they aren't alone with their struggles, we are all in this TOGETHER, and we can help each other through it. I started therapy last year and it's been one of the most powerful and empowering things I've ever done for myself. I wish you all the best, man.

[@morgancross5481]

What Ben said.

[@Leviathan_013]

@@morgancross5481 Agreed 1000%

[@JesseMichel]

I've always struggled with mental health and all my loved ones have recommended therapy for years and years but I have always avoided it. Seeing someone I look up to talk about it is awesome. Thanks Ben!

[@markipedia5511]

feeling morally obligated to share your insights during mania is such a great way to describe it, I sometimes want to climb on my roof and shout them into the world even though it's 3am

[@Dyvon.dynamo]

Rob, as an autistic black kid that was navigating the beginning of college in the early years, I see you and your struggles and see the parallels and graces you've given folk like me who wanted to give up but held on trying to learn something from you, to be humored by you or the next Jared Dines collab. You don't know the people you've helped and you continue to help by being honest and empowering. Dude none of us can give you what you've given us in those fleeting moments of thinking it really is just me. No, it's us and we just need to be heard. Thank you for sharing yourself for all these years dude 👊🏿

[@CatFish107]

Well put. Pretend I just quoted the whole post "for truth"

[@toseltreps1101]

wtf does it matter if you're black? race card much?

[@CatFish107]

@toseltreps1101 being a member of a minority might make somebody feel extra "different", or othered. It is actually applicable context.

[@stevai6732]

@@toseltreps1101 tbh it seems rare that there are black autistics, seems mostly whites or asians are but whatever I think it's interesting.

[@atlassolid5946]

​@@toseltreps1101 POC can often feel isolated, it makes sense to bring up in order to point to the stigma that this person went through. especially since black autistic people are especially underrepresented.

[@Ajcav763]

I read something today that I was reminded of when you said you were such a burden to Tamara, your wife. A burden is something you are forced unwillingly to bear, but she loves you and willingly chooses to take on that load and help you carry it. That's true and powerful love right there, Rob. Like you said, it was her choice to stay with you and help you every day, that's not a burden, that's love.

[@CatFish107]

Tamara out there, setting an excellent example for partners everywhere.

[@giantturd5157]

Why did you need to had "your wife?" He knows who his wife is...

[@stuartstent4764]

Thank you Tamara. Being a supporter is hard, and often feels thankless. Just so you know, you rock!

[@audise2]

Absolutely this! I cried during their embrace, it must've been so hard for them both. Great work pulling through and here's to a better year!

[@michaelpotts5336]

I've filled those shoes before. I'm haunted by the experience of watching my spouse self-destruct. Happy to say we came out the other side and have healed. But I now have a persistent fear of the possibility of recurrence.

[@BoxOfSnoo]

"You rock" yes. It's almost all we can say but what an understatement! Support like that from someone is almost the closest thing to being a superhero. I hardly know anything about you but I know you're a top-tier amazing person.

[@Mr_Boyer]

25:18 That's a good person and spouse right there. The look on her face as she hugs Rob is one of the sweetest things you'll ever see.

[@thatmckenzie]

I watched the First of October episodes on both channels and thought to myself, "oh, man, Rob's got cancer." Glad it was just a scumbag brain instead. Much love!

[@schrodingersbraincell5861]

I’m not sure if it’s just because I’ve had mental health issues in the past, but when I saw that first of October video, it as instantly like ‘oh, he’s depressed’

[@abbleshawce]

dude thats crazy ive been watching you for like 10 years. im 31 and am currently in my 2nd psychosis of my life. heading towards schizoeffective diagnosis but it takes a long time

[@balaenopteramusculus]

All the best to you, man.

[@jooolius]

wishing you the best ❤

[@e8ghtmileshigh1]

Schizoaffective

[@CatFish107]

It can be a wonderful feeling to eventually get a diagnosis. That relief of somebody recognizing and having at least some understanding of what's not going right. For me, it was a lot of "oh, that's why x,y,z."

[@michaelthompson2474]

Love and support to you, glad you shared

[@thewrens_]

Going back to what you said in the FOO video now - "I'm still sick" is such an insanely powerful and validating way to frame it. Whether that was the intention or it was that you were just trying to not give anything away, it honestly inspires me to hear mental illness being talked about in such so shamelessly. Yes. It's not trivial, it's not fake, it's not something to just grin and bear. Reminds me of the quote from Dimension 20 (shout out to all of you who know what that is), "You're not a coward; You have a medical condition." I have a tendency to favour an "it's fine" attitude to my anxiety and depressive tendencies. But it's not fine - not always. And just like any physical condition, we should take the time we need to care for ourselves. Thank you.

[@swiftlymurmurs]

If only we all had a Jawbone O'Shaughnessy in our lives to remind us of that when we need it

[@alejandrosoto5714]

Hoot Growl!

[@maxmcclelland1119]

You can’t drop the Jawbone quote and not include the “I was in a truck stop bathroom sucking off a border patrol agent…” segment. That’s essential to the meaning.

[@XCHADHIGGINSX]

This is the most important video you have ever made. This was amazing Rob. Much love.

[@Iliketomakestuff]

I'm so proud of you Rob, and I'm super grateful that you're doing better. I hope we get to do something together again soon!

[@RePotHead]

Thought it was the Temu logo lol

[@faselblaDer3te]

Man, the look on Andrew's face when he asks how Rob is doing... That's a good friend.

[@halfbee7886]

Big W for Tamara, for how supportive she is of Rob through his struggles. ❤

[@Spidouz]

1:10 I havn’t watch the rest of the video yet, but let me tell you THANK YOU for having the balls to talk about Mental Health openly. This is very important because mental health is very often ignored by people, it’s seen as something negative… like someone being “crazy”. This is completely wrong. If tomorrow you break a bone, everybody will tell you to go to the hospital and check a specialist. Same thing if you get cancer… but somehow, if the illness if not physical but mental, suddenly people will start to think you’re just “crazy”. NO … and let me be clear, on the course of your life, absolutely EVERYBODY on earth will face at least once in his/her life some mental health issues. It could be depression, anxiety, addictions, phobies, you name it… plenty of mental illnesses that don’t make you crazy. It’s very important to be open and vocal about it, to share our experience and change the general perception of mental health. I suffer from chronic pain and I have clinical depression. I’m near 50 and I only started to think about it the last 5 years… I lived over 40 years without taking care of it, and it was ruining my life without knowing. So I’m glad you’re using your platform to talk about your experience and maybe help others in the mean time. It’s very brave and courageous from you when we know how some bullies can use social media to harass people that would disclose their mental health issues. Stay strong, cheers!

[@capt_bry]

licensed clinical social worker here; ive worked in the mental health field for 15 years and have only once met a man in his 30s that had his first psychotic break. late onset is very rare. hope you're in a good place. long time fan

[@baggiefr]

first of october is the reason i started writing songs. i'm 18 now, 5/6 years into writing consistently, possibly having written around a thousand either full songs, or snippets of songs, whatever. when i saw you were having some trouble in the last first of october video, it kinda hit me like a truck, i'll be honest. thank you for everything man. i hope you can feel a bit better just knowing that the effort you put in to keep yourself going day after day has changed people's lives. i'm wishing you the best!

[@George_vv]

Every bit of this comment is exactly my situation. We love you Rob! First of October got me into song writing and really taught me how to make songs under tight time constraints. I was able to make an album that helped me understand and process the realities of my mental health in the limited time I had access to audio equipment. While the mixing still has a long way to go, the songs I made for the most part sound complete and the entire work as a whole is something I can be proud of looking back at that really dark period of my life. Thank you so much Rob if you are reading this.

[@adequatelyadequate7071]

As you hoped, this video makes me feel very seen. "Am I sane, can I trust this decision" is the part that hit hardest for me. Once you've been out of control of your emotions, mind, and body any time you take any risk, any big investment, any joy, any sadness, any bad day all you can think is "is this the start of another year?"

[@ZijnShayatanica]

Even after almost a decade in remission, I still question whether I'm mentally fit to do things. And happiness is REALLY ALARMING... Because obv I don't want to get swept away & then it turned out to be mania instead of real happiness & I ruin my life. It's fkn difficult as hell & I hope to learn how to navigate that situation someday.

[@nunogabriel1]

YES. I am afraid that the doubt will steal any life experience that may come, BUT, I am afraid that the experience is a part of mania. It is a struggle for sure

[@CatFish107]

It was a heart shattering disappointment to discover I can't trust my gut reaction, emotions, or even thoughts. Realizing your inner voice is full of bs can be demoralizing to deal with, and necessitates a lot more careful analysis all the time.

[@Jeremy_Adams]

I know exactly what you went through. 12 years ago I became addicted to opiates. When I was on those I didn’t eat, barely slept, I was extremely happy, super motivated and creative. 8 years ago I got clean and I swung hard the other way. I’m still waiting for it to swing back and level out. Sometimes I worry I used up all my serotonin in my addiction but I have to believe I will get back to normal at some point.

[@AEThrasher]

I have bi-polar 1 as well, but out of embarrassment didn’t work to help myself through therapy and self-care. This cost me my marriage as my wife couldn’t handle this after years of extreme highs and extreme lows. It is amazing to see someone talk so candidly about this disorder to their audience and share their story as a form of release.

[@chief2540]

Hey! I went through a similar thing! I had about 3-4 episodes of acute psychosis which resulted in a good chunk of my relationships being obliterated, losing many personal belongings such as my vehicle, a load of my music equipment, computer equipment, and I also erased everything I could find on the internet about myself, and proceeded to get into a nasty vehicle accident. All fun stuff, you know? I'm getting better by the day, and It's good to see you are too, Rob! You inspire me, with your skill in music, your easygoing, humourous personality, and content creation! It's really nice to see that despite our struggles, we are still able to be happy (ish) and successful. Stay strong, man. ❤

[@Rwko.]

Hope you are doing well my friend. I love you

[@Urodahero]

Wishing you all the best, great that you're getting better. Perseverance is inspiring, though it would be great if things didn't get this rough. I hope people will pay more attention to their and theirs loved ones mental health more. Videos like this are important

[@chief2540]

@@Urodahero Thank you, and yes, I agree, mental health has always been incredibly important, and even more so in an age such as today where more and more people are being removed from reality via the internet. One of the best things to make me feel better is to disconnect, and just hang out with my friends. Stay grounded, bros.

[@herfriendscallherdez]

I'm fighting off some serious depression and self-harm that's lasted for years on years. I can't watch this video right now and I don't know that I'll ever be in a place that will allow me to but I still want to voice my support and let it be known that you and others like you are not alone.

[@hellacious_]

Hey, from one internet stranger to another, I believe in you. ❤

[@johnathanrhoades7751]

Way to go with setting boundaries! Keep at it, it can get better. I’ve been in the severe depression/self harm boat many times and thankfully have had much less suicidal ideation and no real self harm incidents in a the last couple of years. Still not done with the fight, but therapy community and practicing the tools I’ve learned have definitely been helpful.

[@uninterestedcat8429]

I'm very sorry to hear that. Hopefully you have at least one good person to help you up when you fall down. Pray you'll feel better one day g. And I hope you'll watch this video, I had been in a similar way up until I got out of highschool, and here in my 20's I'm finally able to realize I've got my whole life ahead to figure my shit out, there's a lot to do, to want to do, new people to meet, things to see, all given the right place and time. Just don't rush yourself, and don't hold yourself back from attempting to heal. Frankly sometimes it has to get worse to get better, I nearly offed myself with a plasma cutter, only after with the clarity of having been able to heal mentally and physically I finally was able to make a break through, not to say to do that obviously, but that's to say watching a video or a few like this, can be so so so much more helpful than you think, each iota of progress is progress. Don't try to think of it as taking on other people worries or problems, an issue I had for a long time, but as advice from someone ina rough spot too. Get well soon fella

[@stickiedmin6508]

You'll be okay. You're a lot stronger than you think, I promise you - some day soon, you're gonna surprise the hell out of yourself. Think about how far you've come already, how much you've survived, how many obstacles you've overcome . . . You're inspiring, and when you realise that, you'll be unbeatable. Stay safe, be well, and _let it go._

[@lez0n]

FYI, if you have bipolar (I or II) you have it for life. It’s about medication (more than we care to admit MANY times), stress management, therapy, sleep, diet, and exercise. Also, there is most definitely a correlation (not causation) between bipolar disorder and artists. (AMA a 50 y.o. Mental health professional who had his first manic episode at 18 in art school.) So glad to see you do this video.

[@judas_saves]

I was never really diagnosed with anything (other than opiate addiction some 13 years ago, when I quit), but your argument makes sense - correlation to music, art. As a musician I can say this - I have very high ups and very very deep lows.. It is now coming to a point where I can't even write or record music, which I LOVE!

[@lez0n]

@@judas_saves most addiction comes self medicating of other issues.

[@noizeemama3697]

Thank you for acknowledging your wife. People don't realize what a toll this takes on families and how much it takes to stay there for you.

[@stefanfyhn4668]

Schizophrenia sufferer here, thanks for helping break the stigmas of mental health, Rob. Wish you the best!

[@jacevess7556]

I love how understanding Andrew, his wife, and producer are. So sweet.

[@wighteboyclarkst]

I've struggled with MDD (Major Depressive Disorder) my entire life, and I'm just now after 24 years of life starting to want to be around and actually have a life. So I've stated taking better care of myself, losing weight, and working on my mental health. I don't smile much, I never have. And I couldn't stop smiling for this whole video because I knew It was ending on a high note and a story of recovery. Thank you Rob for years of great music and fun videos, Here's to lots more of both and better life's for all of us.

[@truecuckoo]

All the strength to you. This was felt deeply. So important! ❤️

[@bbellomusic]

I’m a psychiatrist, currently working at the Amen Clinic in Costa Mesa. I want to clarify something, because it’s really important for your long term prognosis. You don’t have Bipolar I Disorder if this is your only manic episode. I know, per DSM criteria, you only need to have 1 lifetime episode to qualify for Bipolar I, but it doesn’t count if it’s in the context of a substance, including antidepressants. I’m assuming the medication you were referring to was either an SSRI or something over the counter, like Kratom or St. John’s Wort. If that’s accurate, then you probably had Substance-Induced Bipolar Disorder, which is its own diagnosis and, like you said, isn’t expected to result in another manic episode if you stay away from the substance (medication). This makes sense, since the vast majority of people with Bipolar I will have their first lifetime manic episode in their teens or early 20’s. You were already in your 30’s. It sounds like you probably also have PTSD since you mentioned trauma several times. I’ve had many many patients in my career with PTSD have one-off psychotic episodes with drugs or high stress, so I’m glad you have the therapist, too. Anyway, thank you for talking candidly about your mental health. Sending positive vibes into the universe that you never have another episode like this again.

[@ZiddersRooFurry]

Thank you for helping people.

[@conescience2551]

I haven't watched the video in its entirety and don't know if he has been officially diagnosed as BP1 but yeah this comment is obviously correct. Sounds like a substance induced manic episode to me if it was the side effect of a medication. I think Rob is inadvertently pushing a lot of misinformation in this video which in itself could be harmful to people with actual BP1.

[@bbellomusic]

@@conescience2551 he says that his doctors officially diagnosed him with it. But yeah, I agree with you. He’s only repeating what they told him, so not his fault. There are a lot of bad/misinformed psychiatrists out there

[@mistadobalina3495]

Didnt he mention psychedelics? Maybe microdosing shrooms or lsd?

[@iluvyunie]

in my case medication exacerbated the problem, what I needed was reorienting

[@zacharycranmer958]

I remember commenting about the struggles of mental health on that FoO video and getting GRILLED by so many people saying it’s not mental health, he’s physically sick. People cussing me out and being extraordinarily nasty. I know what “I’m just so tired” means, and I tried to offer words of encouragement. I’m so happy that you’re getting the treatment you need and have the support that you have! We love you so much Rob, this video will help a lot of people!

[@colinburroughs9871]

people that haven't dealt with this first hand or themselves have a hard time understanding that the issue is real.. a sort of normalcy bias

[@dstbnny_ch]

what really highlights the stigma that still exists around mental health, to me, is how in the First of October video the comments, while supportive, assume and sometimes insist that the "medical thing" Rob is going through is a physical condition. like it didn't even register that a mental illness could affect someone to that extent, which is false, obviously. you're a gem Rob and i think this video is gonna help a lot of people ❤

[@tpioh_]

rob, as a long time fan, and as someone who's suffered from psychosis, delusions, paranoia, mania, severe depression etcetera for several years at this point, i can not explain how much it means to me that you have made this video ♡ i'm so happy you're doing better and i hope you continue to help break the stigma! it's ok to not be ok! love you rob! - a schizoaffective bipolar subtype "patient"

[@alcy-]

Seeing someone so candidly describe experiences I've had hit me so hard. I have monopolar depression, essentially that dip period you had but unending and without any counterpart. Feeling like I'm a burden on everyone around me, that I don't deserve their help or presence, that I need to rid them of me, is at the forefront of my mind all the time, and it fucking hurts. I'm glad you're out of the trenches. No one deserves them.

[@OliviaSNava]

That sentiment about like "When I was there, I felt like I was making it all up, and I didn't deserve the help." I know that feeling!! This isn't a bipolar thing, but it is very much a mental health impostor syndrome. Glad you're talking about mental health more publicly, Rob.

[@vibesofthenow]

im a young musician that’s been going through the same things for years now. i feel seen, thank you

[@mike__durrett]

Thank you for sharing, Rob. It's not easy to be open about that, but I hope this helps folks destigmatize mental health things.

[@YogiMcPogi]

Fighting late-diagnosed ADD and depression with suspected bipolar right now and I'm currently in pretty bad shape again. Your video gave me more power to continue seeing this through. Thanks, Rob!

[@iliveonatropicalisland6086]

Dude you sound exactly like me these past few years I had been depressed and anxious for like 4 years. Broke down and finally got medical help. Got diagnosed with Depression and General Anxiety Disorder. Suspect I had ADHD, got a diagnosis. Thought I was getting better, then get depressed again, rinse and repeat for a few times. BOOM, it's hypomania, got diagnosed with bipolar II. It definitely was a journey, but it gets better I swear. Trust your feelings, take your time. You're figure yourself out. Be gentle with yourself.

[@CatFish107]

​@iliveonatropicalisland6086 It can quite a relief to gain a bit of understanding of what's going on upstairs, eh? Similar situation over here. An ADHD thread I read on an old forum is titled "ADHD: You are not stupid, lazy, bad or "faking it". Never been."

[@diagonaltripod3713]

Stay strong. I know life may be a pain at times, I've been struggling with Generalized anxiety, ADD and possibly something else (I've had learning challenges simaler to Autism but I'm not actually autistic) my whole life and I've been struggling with agoraphobia (a difficult type of panic disorder) for almost 10 years now, which has caused depression and self loathing over the years. I'm luckily been doing better for the most part lately but I know its not fun going through depression. I wish I could help you get over it but I know from experience that figuring out yourself is one of the most helpful things with depression. However know you dont have to be alone, as so many people have depression, its just a shame that society makes talking about mental health and depression taboo. Stay strong and there is help out there

[@ZukeIGuess]

Hey man. Glad you're still with us and you're on the other side ❤ (Shoutout to Tamara for being amazing)

[@eatmyshit90]

Just wanted to say as someone who was diagnosed BP 2 in 2022, your testimony is so validating. Thank you for talking about this.

[@Hellbrotherhood]

Corey Taylor managed to be a badass even in this situation lol Anyway, wish you all the best with your mental state, Rob! As a psychologist I feel like pharmacology is kinda wild and dangerous atm, while truly great psychotherapy/psychoanalysis, which gets to the source of the problem is truly rare.

[@hypersentient]

my worst periods have all been on medications... it's so hard to predict how anyone will be affected.

[@ZijnShayatanica]

As someone who's been on a variety of meds, many to horrible effect... It sucks that we're at a point in time where we have to throw spaghetti at the wall in order to treat the symptoms of mental illness, but I'm 100% TEAM MEDS. Lamictal gave me my life back... I wouldn't be capable of therapy if my moods weren't stabilized. And almost a decade later, I have no desire to ever stop taking it because I don't want to risk my life going downhill to where it was before - it was hell. But I hope that better solutions are found in the future, to where no one has to try 5+ meds before they find one that does more good than harm... It's already hard enough to keep Bipolar/Schizophrenic patients med compliant, lol

[@ZijnShayatanica]

@tomy480 OP & none of us in the replies are Psychiatrists, so you're not going to find useful medication advice here if you were asking for it. And yeah, I'm skeptical of that dangerous messaging... While I know trauma can worsen symptoms or bring on an episode, there is no evidence that trauma is the only factor to cause Bipolar & that treating the trauma will cause the symptoms to disappear. 🙃

[@ernestopreciado4895]

Medication is not perfect, it will always have risks. But evidence based treatment will always be better than psychotherapy/psychoanalysis alone. Specially psychoanalysis that comes from Freudian, Jungian or Lacanian theories. It's the homeopathy of the mental health world. It will look like it's working only in mild problems that could go away just with time and some counselling. But with serious illnesses... whole other story.

[@michaelk1589]

If anyone considers takich psych meds, one should first read thoroughly pages like benzobuddies or survivngantidepressants. Im sure one will abandon such a crazy idea since the truth is revealead on those sites. People having such severe withdrawal symptoms that only viable solution is cessation of ex is tenc. People pushing those neurotoxins without mentioning the above have red juice on their hands (have to switch words so that comment wont get deleted).

[@0000Sierra117]

I have OCD, and some of the meds i've been on made the intrusive thoughts *worse*, a lot. I don't want to get into specifics, but parts of this video really resonated with me in a way that helps. Thank you. And for what it's worth, things are entirely better for me now. I have a healthy relationship, good friends, a great job, and am in good health both physically and mentally.

[@blurofmemories]

Ocd is so ass, glad you got through that difficult time aswell

[@VideosRunescape4u]

I've suffered from severe anxiety, love you talking about mental health and making it a public thing

[@jonnybrown1717]

as someone who was diagnosed with bipolar 1 and have had my share of episodes im so grateful that you came out the other side of this. and it really helped me reflect on my own struggles. wishing you nothing but love and light Rob.

[@williamgrand9724]

Imposter syndrome and Gaslighting myself about my ADHD is really destructive because it stopped me from getting help.

[@rustyshackleford8497]

Imposter Syndrome is scarier than people think. Been there when I had an opiate problem. Glad you're passed that, it's no joke!

[@ThijsSchnater]

I can 100% relate. It’s that paired with the feeling of looking at people around you, thinking they’re more successful than you are and that it looks like it doesn’t cost them as much energy which really did a number on me.

[@David-rj1ru]

suck it up ducky cups.

[@RyanStonedonCanadianGaming]

Ive spent 2 weeks in mental hospital, How you described your psychosis is exactly how I felt, plus some. I was diagnosed with a form of schizophrenia. It's been years, but it still feels strange to this day. (I'm doing better, the meds they gave me was some crazy stuff that I had to wing myself off of and they believe cannabis was partially responsible what caused my episode. I don't see figures and have certain thoughts like people I dont know talking about me right infront of me.) I've had some strange things happen and I believe trauma is partially a major factor into why I had lapsed into psychosis. *To anyone having mental health problems, **_PLEASE_** talk to someone!* And to Rob, We're all here for you!

[@TheGrouchCouch]

Amazing honesty Rob. This helps remove the stigma. My group has a saying. "Its okay, to Not be Okay" Thank you for this. I wish you the best on your journey.

[@seby912]

Powerful lyric from while she sleeps as well!

[@freeman7079]

I was diagnosed with the same thing. I appreciate your honesty. You help me more than I can ever show you just by talking about this. I love you man!

[@DesignCourse]

Jesus, you have me questioning my own mind atm 😬 Glad you got it 'figured out' so to speak.

[@RedSectorAndy]

Mental illness is far more common than people think. If you become curious enough to understand the inner workings of your mind, make sure to talk to a professional about it. The internet and the opinions of the public only take you so far and sometimes even in the wrong direction.

[@davidmcleod1760]

Same

[@jasonhughes3481]

The hardest part about being a creative in a major depressive state mixed with dysphoria is how much you want returning to your craft to make you feel better. But when you're stuck under that cloud of depressive thoughts it actually seems to have thd opposite effect. The mental blockage, the hampered creativity, and the ensuing frustration and apathy just exacerbate your negative feelings. Add the feelings of obligation into things, and your stuggle through recording back in October is a perfect illustration of this overwhelming scenario. Thanks for sharing your story and im glad that you found the support and guidance you needed go navigate through everything.

[@michaelpotts5336]

Thanks for sharing this, Rob. After living through my wife's horrific episode with BP psychosis in 2021-2022(which included four arrests and involuntary hospitalizations), I've been on a quest to understand this insidious disease. I appreciate your insight and honesty. I'm happy you're doing well. Equally happy to say we've had 2 years of stability and healing on the other side of it as well. Love and respect to you, brother.

[@littledoud]

thank you for talking about this. As someone who has been bouncing back and forth between manic episodes ever since I was prescribed an SSRI for depression without knowing there was underlying Bipolar. Mania is a terribly scary thing, especially when you are unaware you are even acting outside your normal self. The actions taken during mania can also create a great deal of shame, so even uploading this video with the level of honesty and vulnerability that you displayed is so incredibly admirable. I don't know you and you don't know me, but now I at least know I've got one more person experiencing this crazy world a little bit like I do. (also, your friend who told you it will be a year before you're back to your "normal" self, that's entirely circumstantial. I have had 9 manic episodes over the course of 1 year with 0 depressive swings. Bipolar is unique to each individual, and the most important part of the journey is learning how it impacts you and growing your awareness around your true self so when mania comes around, you will know as soon as you start to move off baseline.) Thanks Rob. You're awesome

[@theashen]

I also have Bipolar 1 and just came out of hospital 2 weeks ago after a month of treatment. It’s important to talk about this stuff, so thanks.

[@FromBlueToGreeneOFFICIAL]

Smaller music creator here that was diagnosed with bipolar disorder back in 2021. It’s a long and difficult journey, but so worth it. The hardest part about it is figuring out what things in your life bring you mania, and what things bring you depression. Being stable is the dream, but it’s so worth working towards. Thanks for sharing your journey and experience with us all, KZbin and the world needs more of this, more openness of what really goes on. We’re all human, we all got shit going on, ain’t nothing wrong with it

[@alexeastin2998]

I've been dealing with pretty severe mental health problems all my life. Consistent, intense depressive episode where I see no joy or hope and experience what seems like only despair. 2023 was horrible for me, multiple stays in mental hospitals, my father's diagnosis of cancer, and my own illness, making me lose 100 lbs in 5 months. Mental health is something that NEEDS to be talked about in all its painful and embarrassing detail so that others realize that they are not alone and never once have been. Thank you, Rob, for your honesty, transparency, and frankness. Your words have truly helped.

[@justinknots]

Hey Rob, very casual fan here. Happened across this video yesterday and I just wanted to say thank you for it. Over the past four years my teenage child has been going through a LOT of mental health stuff that you touched on in this video, including (but certainly not limited to) suicidal ideation. It has been the hardest thing I've ever worked through in my life. For you to put out this video means a lot to me. To simply speak about it and let people know they are not alone and that there is help... My kid is doing better these days, mania and depression are something she is learning to navigate in a healthy fashion. She is thriving. This video could save someone's life. I mean that with full sincerity and zero hyperbole. So thank you. You're doing great.

[@Impleione]

"Usually" honestly was my favorite song on last year's first of october, for what it's worth. Thank you for opening up about this, it was great to hear about your experiences with BP. I wish you the best going forward, hope you'll have tons of success with the projects yet to come. I know I'll be watching and appreciating everything that comes around here.

[@thebrainscoop]

Rob, thanks so much for sharing this and raising awareness about Bipolar Disorder. I hate that we live with it, but I’m glad there are people like you who make this a little less lonely. Love you so much ❤

[@clownmoshpit2778]

God hearing you talk about the embarrassment that comes with mania is so real, really appreciate you putting out this video.

[@luisfelipeferreiradosantos8099]

The feeling that can not trust your own feelings is dreadful. It makes you want to shut them away forever, and the fear just keeps getting bigger...

[@CCnowhere]

Usually had been the standout track for me from the last First of October, one that really, really resonated with me personally. Now it means so much more hearing what you had been going through. Thank you for sharing this story with us Rob, I'm so sorry to hear that you had to go through that, but very happy that you seem to be in a much better headspace now!

[@WhirlyTail]

I'm not one for sappy comments and I'll be sure to keep it brief, but this video brought me to tears and I need to share. I have bipolar II, along with a whole host of other mental health issues, that have been SEVERELY impacting my ability to function for over 3 years now. the past 9 months have been the worst part of my life by far, and sometimes it feels utterly hopeless. I've been following your content for years (Andrew too, I was there for day 1 of First of October), and you've been a constant source of creative inspiration for me. Hearing someone like that speak to exactly the same issues I've been dealing with is really really reassuring. Thank you for being open about this, and thank you for everything. I wish you the best, forever.

[@liltummy]

Thank you for sharing so openly. Hearing you talk about Tamara really made me tear up because hearing you acknowledge her ability to be that immediate at-home support, and acknowledging the potential loneliness she may have experienced within that is something I relate to tremendously. My partner deals with pretty deep depression at times, and I'm usually that immediate at-home support system. I'm always there and genuinely willing to help however I can in the moment, but it can get challenging at times. Knowing there are others out there who are practicing that unwavering love and support for their loved ones gives me strength to always be their for mine. Thank you for sharing this and helping to destigmatize these experiences for those who experience it either first-hand or are taking on a support role and just need to know sometimes that they aren't alone in providing that support.

[@darkpsimystic]

As someone who struggles every day with mental health, battling all those thoughts and feelings, I am saluting you so damn hard for sharing your story. This internet stranger and dad is proud of you, dude.

[@Mattlon3]

the feeling of "im making this up for attention" combined with the ~bad thoughts is the worst feeling in the world. I went through something i would describe as similar a while back and never really talked to anyone about for that reason, like if im wrong and it really was in my head then i must deserve to feel the way i did kinda mentality and its really really rough. i know it doesnt mean much to hear form randos on the internet but i hope youre doing better! ive always loved the videos and i always view your content as a positive influence in my life.

[@gutbucket6184]

Can you explain the “all in my head” thing? I hear it a lot and can’t really wrap my head around it because mental health issues are “in your head”. Doesn’t make it any less real or serious, does it? (If you’re not comfortable explaining i understand)

[@fleshy4203]

@@gutbucket6184 in a way it feels like youre making excuses for your own faults. You think to yourself that youre being dramatic and blowing everything out of proportion. Eventually you start getting it into yourself that all the horrible ways you feel are just a reflection of who you are, not some mental condition. You think to yourself "im just a bad person", "i deserve this", etc. The only way I can really relate the thought process is to how people react when a child hurts themselves by accident. An adult can see that they just got a bump, but to the kid its the worst thing ever. When its in your head you feel like both the kid crying for help and the adult talking down to yourself.

[@MrHandleman123]

The human spirit is an instrument we all have to learn to play. It’s a complicated one. Thanks for helping with more of the theory stuff.

[@jordanqueen6897]

I commend your courage for talking about this. This video felt incredibly moving and personal to me. I lost my brother in 2016 to suicide and he was, seemingly, one of the happiest, brightest people I’d ever met in my life. He was the sort of guy who you’d never guess had as many thoughts haunting him as he did. I respect the fact that you’re sharing this experience with people because so many individuals don’t understand what mental illness looks like, even nowadays. Thank you, Rob.

[@ShatteringWind]

Was he ever diagnosed or on any medications? Sorry to pry, I am also having dark thoughts and have a brother and this comment scares me as I would never want to subject my brother to such pain. It's just really hard some days.

[@paradigmofficial9328]

we are all here for you rob, we all love you man!