r/AmITheA**hole for Telling My Husband's Family that He's a Swinger?

[@vinzenzamann5961]

What really gets me about the engagement ring story ist the line: "they said I could even keep my wedding band" as if they had any right to any belongings of op

[@TheKillerqueen40]

Same! I was shocked at that, like they're "allowing" her? Disrespectful little shits.

[@MindRamble]

If he thinks Diamonds are a scam buy a moissanite. It looks like a diamond and is super cheap so you can get really big stones. I would be super flabbergased. If I die then sure have my engagement ring but its a gift for me and connected with a lot of feelings I want to wear it us much as possible.

[@freedomcat]

Half siblings said the same about the bank account and house when my mom became diabetic.

[@savannahs.5874]

That's literally the most gaslighting shit I've ever heard that poor woman

[@dudeorduuude5211]

I don't even think that is typical... the mom is still alive and still married. Usually it is the grandparents rings or great grandparents. The son and daughter in laws need to be educated as they are aholes

[@DgShadowChocolate]

On the bus story: my bet is that the loving husband here doesn’t like the attention his wife gives to others via her gift. He calls her shy and quiet; I’m sure he prefers it when she stays shy and quiet. Complaining about how embarrassed he is when she displays a personality is probably his way of ‘managing’ her. Ugh.

[@az547]

No he's unempathetic all around town. From the post: Redditor1: Do you refuse to tip anyone? OP: If the service is bad. Another disagreement her and I have. she believes everyone deserves a tip no matter what because we don't know if they're overworked, have family stuff or just a rough day. 😅 COME ON MAN

[@lemonbars1576]

​@@az547OK so he's just an ass okay I thought maybe the bus drivers were men and he was like jealous or thinks it's some from Of cheating but no he just doesn't like people in the service industry

[@TomDarkwulf87]

The swinger story, I think what happened is exactly WHY OP's husband had only her make an account instead of him or both of them. That way all the blame would land on her if things went sideways. A lot of those kinds of sites allow you and your partner to link profiles, so if he had made one his family would have instantly known the truth instead of finding out after harassing OP.

[@Mavczers]

And what his family was doing on those websites anyway? To release their inner devil?

[@fartface192]

@@Mavczers they sounded like the type who don't understand personal boundarries other than their own

[@cheri1687]

@@Mavczers well the story didn't say it was his family. It said a family friend was on the dateing app but didn't say it was a swingers dateing app. While they di have swingers app. I know a few swingers and they 1000% hate those apps. Get to many creeps

[@AzureKyle]

@@cheri1687 Yeah, that's something Rslash didn't seem to realize either. It was a family friend, not the family themselves. And it was a dating app. So they saw OP on a dating app and told the family, which then assumed cheating.

[@taxevader7777]

@@AzureKyle yeah that’s why I can’t really say the family friend is an asshole for outing OP because it looked a lot like she was cheating on her husband, which isn’t a good thing, but OPs husband is definitely an asshole for not sticking up for her.

[@franciscojaviermendezrinco1902]

Fourth story: The moment OP said his husband gave her no support against the family harrasment I lost all simpathy for him.

[@RealCoolstriker64]

Alternate interpretations: He’s trying to figure a way out of it, and is saying nothing because saying the wrong thing is WAY worse in the long run. Or He’s shutting down because his worst fears are slowly coming true in front of him. TL;DR We don’t know what he was thinking, or how he was reacting to the situation other than “silence.” Silence can mean many different things.

[@Yendor1224]

@@RealCoolstriker64 does not matter what ihis silence means. He stood there while the call his wife a whore and he knew it wasn't true because she did not nothing wrong. He is a spineless coward. He choose the easy way out. He did not even have to tell them the truth just "stop, we are leaving." but he didn't. The validation of his family was more important to him then the feelings of his wife, who did nothing wrong in the first place. He is a coward, a weasel and a bad husband and partner.

[@wannabehistorian371]

@India Miley Wrong story.

[@michaelburtley2458]

You were or are BOTH in the life and should share the burden as well as the happy fun parts EQUALLY. That's what make it work. Plus the one that outed you was obviously on the site looking for the exact same thing. Do not know any other reason why that person would have been on that site.

[@Ajehy]

The moment she said they were looking for a “unicorn” I winced. “Unicorn hunters” have a really bad reputation in the poly community, and the fact that they unironically use that term (and that he pushed for it) is yet another in a sea of red flags.

[@evarinagarmguardian113]

The story of the wife giving the bus drivers cookies just doesn’t compute! A couple weeks ago my family got a deck built for our house. My mom and I knew how hard those guys worked, so we decided to bake them cookies to show our appreciation. They absolutely loved the cookies! I don’t understand how wanting to show appreciation and thanks to someone is embarrassing. Op is wack in that story. Edit: grammar

[@haraldjohansen1867]

The husband is without a doubt the asshole in this story.

[@neffyg35]

I think op is the type of person that doesn't "lower themselves to hob knob with staff". Like why else would any decent person be embarrassed by kind gestures to service workers unless you think they are beneath you.

[@iridescentsolace]

I always said thank you to the bus driver every day going in and out of the bus and even though I graduated she still remembers me because of that! Op is so weird like why is it embarrassing?? Those bus drivers are probably thrilled to have received gifts?? And if they aren’t they could’ve just thrown them away at home it’s not that deep

[@iridescentsolace]

@@neffyg35 I got that vibe too, especially when he said that stuff about how they don’t deserve that extra appreciation

[@roshnibritto4637]

@@neffyg35ikr

[@meganlowe8507]

I just became a bus driver recently. Sometimes it's a very thankless job. So hearing about people being nice to bus drivers makes my heart feel warm. I wish more parents were like that.

[@foremanhaste5464]

Right there with you. Was a garbage truck worker for a time. An absolutely thankless job that lots of people look down on, but there are a few absolutely saintly people out there that would thank us at Christmas and a few more on ?Civil Worker Day? (not sure what it was called or when it was) with cookies, fresh fruit, or a little cash. The idea judge not a person on how they treat their peers, but their subordinates was never truer.

[@lamppuu1]

​@@foremanhaste5464 it's a shame, you're doing a really important job! We would drown in garbage if you went on a strike for example. I should gift something to our garbage men when i see them next time. ❤ I used to be a cleaner and i know how people can treat you when you're working a blue collar job.

[@itsOasus]

All I have to say about the first story: "If you're not going to be part of my struggles, you don't get to be a part of my success."

[@missluciddreams3472]

Exactly

[@Rzhevv]

Ew a furry

[@missluciddreams3472]

@@Rzhevv ew...a troll

[@Rzhevv]

@@missluciddreams3472 Im not trolling with you furries are ew

[@ameliathestrangecat235]

@@Rzhevv Ew someone so sensitive they cant let people wear a costume

[@spookyruinsfest4936]

"Diamonds are a scam" proceeds to try to force OP to give up her diamond ring. Entitled hypocrite.

[@Juju2927]

First story : I feel llike it IS a question of potential divorce when the Husband straight up said "The House is mine and mine only", because it feels like he's ready to kick her out if she's not willing to give him share of the business.

[@trzpmark]

He said the house was his before they got married. Plus he could have just not let her be a co-owner of the house since he already had the house before the marriage. He was just literally jealous cause she was making more money that's it.

[@neffyg35]

I was already thinking divorce like maybe not out right but she needs to get some legal documents to try to protect herself. He sounds like whatever happened in his previous marriage is coming into his current marriage and that's a massive red flag

[@SoldierSpiderx]

agreed it felt like he ready to divorce her if he don't get his way

[@iris5678]

She should get her own building and move her flowers there and make the tax business in her name. Then he can shut up. Maybe he needs some therapy.

[@_gothy_mothy_]

Not to mention he’s showing the textbook signs of being an abusive narcissist. He’s an abusive husband, that whole story was red flag after red flag.

[@foxqueen6214]

That last story- I would have brought up what the person who ousted them was doing on that site. Like how did she know they had an account unless she too was using the site

[@CaTastrophy427]

Not all people on dating apps are swingers. OP never specified it was a swinger-specific dating app, so it could well have been something like tinder or whatever.

[@mathewcole7848]

@@CaTastrophy427 Still, this hyper-moralistic, judgmental Catholic clan, one might imagine, ought not to be seen on places like Tinder. Remove the plank from thine own eye, and all that.

[@undrhil]

@@CaTastrophy427 But OP did say that they were looking for another couple or a "unicorn" . Which means that they would have to specify in the profile that that is what they are looking for.

[@princessbeaniewiggle]

"Technically this house is mine, not yours" I would have responded with "okay then, if it's your house then I'll stop paying half the rent and you can pay all of it"

[@lizxu322]

Half the bills or mortgage, not rent as they own it, it's not rented

[@jariccacierra8445]

@@lizxu322 eh. A mortgage is essentially rent. Bank/loan company buys the house and you rent it back for 15 years/however long it takes you to pay it off. It's a rent to own with interest

[@danielhounshell2526]

@@jariccacierra8445 not really. The bank loans you the money, they have no ownership over it, the house is simply used as collateral for the loan. The same way that if you use your car as collateral the lender doesn't magically gain ownership rights to the car it just means that in the event that you default on the loan they can use the car to pay for it. This usually happens at a huge loss, which is why banks are willing to jump through so many hoops to avoid foreclosure

[@dracko158]

His response? *Surprised Pikachu Face*

[@jariccacierra8445]

@@danielhounshell2526 it still holds the basic principle of renting: pay this person/company a certain amount or get kicked out

[@Chronomaxx]

Speaking as a teacher, a very underappreciated profession, I LOVE getting cookies from my kids and their parents. Any gift is appreciated, but it takes time and effort to bake homemade cookies, or fudge, or cupcakes and the kids always smile so brightly when I thank them and even try one in front of them. Their pride when they tell me how they helped bake them is priceless. That dad needs to get over himself.

[@PurpleKron]

I always helped my mom make cookies, fudge, chocolate covered berries and pretzels, and we would make a tray for each of my teachers. I ended up befriending most of my teachers and while it got me bullied by peers, I wouldn't change growing up being pushed more, challenged, believed in, and cared for by my teachers. I cherish each one that came into my life for the life lessons they imparted. It really all did start with little baked goods trays lol.

[@JLAndersen01]

For the bus driver story: appreciation for bus drivers is important! Especially right now because there is a BUS DRIVER SHORTAGE!! The wife is amazing and I bet she gives the servers an extra tip behind the husband's back when they're leaving because he did a 5% tip.

[@ChiditheLitleo667]

There’s a bus driver shortage? Since when?

[@Zangoose5]

Agreed. The husband, and for that matter all the other people puffing him up, are idiots for not seeing a kind gesture for what it actually is. Just someone trying to be nice. Because apparently in this day and age, that’s seen as…wrong?

[@JLAndersen01]

@@ChiditheLitleo667 There is at least in my state, it may not be everywhere I guess.

[@JLAndersen01]

@DJ Martinez 250 Maybe she doesn't make him cookies and he's jealous

[@toysruskid5074]

@@ChiditheLitleo667 My state is so short staffed in bus drivers that the counties are offering them free CDL training and are hiring just about anyone willing to take it.

[@DeannaJacksonDJsDelectables]

The flower garden story reminds me of "The Little Red Hen". OP is doing all the work and her husband wants to read the benefits of all the hard work she put onto something he had nothing to do with.

[@ArcanineEspeon]

You read my mind. If only she could tuck him into bed and read it as a bedtime story, then ask him what he thought the moral was before giving him a goodnight kiss and turning off the lights.

[@garden_goth7140]

i honestly think divorce would be a good choice if he acts like that all the time…

[@silverflight01]

Man, how miserable is OP3? The wife is being nice and giving gifts, and OP3 shames her? Sounds like misery.

[@enderjed]

Sounds like an abuser to me. Blames her for his own shame in not understanding kindness

[@KumiChan2004]

I might be grumpy. And a jerk. But hell if I had someone like that in my life, that wanted to show appreciation to others in that way I would support them.

[@countywhereverfan9960]

"WhAt is kiNdNeSs? Because I am just an insecure JERK whose wife is great at showing appreciation to people, for me that concept is too hard to grasp"

[@GamerSapss]

@@enderjed Dude, that's taking it a bit far don't you think? Some people don't like unwarranted attention, which cookie-giving definitivly does. I still think the husband is in the wrong, but calling someone an abuser, a word with an increadibly negative conotation, just because of that? Please don't just mindlessly throw words around like that, we allready see words being needlesly thrown around on the internet like this to the point people just are getting desensitized when they actually see a real claim of it.

[@stephanien6237]

@@GamerSapss he goes so far as to tell his wife not to do something that has literally zero impact on him. That’s the warning sign people are reacting to. He may or may not be an abuser but he certainly shows signs of being controlling. How would he even know that she is giving the cookies to the bus driver? Is he hovering over her every move?! (Sounds like it) Does it take usually take 2 parents to walk a kid to the bus? No, it does not.

[@Rileyann130]

For the bus driver story: I’m a teacher, and I can tell you with 100% certainty that it is not a job for everyone. So whenever I get a gift, it always goes appreciated! Especially if it is handmade because the maker had to spend time and effort to make it just to show someone how much they care about the job the reserver is doing! So I think that the mom in the story is so sweet and so kind and deserves all the love in the world

[@neilprice513]

The first story: OP should just buy raised portable flower beds and buy bags of soil and mulch to bed the flowers in. It may cost a bit, but that way OP's husband can't claim any of it for himself (even him saying he owned the soil in a shared home is moronic) The Second Story: There are engagement rings that you can get for just a few hundred pounds/dollars etc. These are known to be temporary rings, for those that can't afford anything expensive and are meant to be replaced at a later point in time (most don't though) So OP not wanting to give her own engagement ring, which has sentimental value to her, in no way makes her the A-Hole. OP's son and future DIL are sounding rather materialistic and entitled TBH. The Third Story: When I was a kid, in Primary School (Grade School), at the end of each school year I would get my teacher a small box of chocolates. To thank them for looking after me and teaching me. Now I'm pushing 40 whenever I'm in hospital I give the nurses a big box of chocolates as a thankyou when I'm discharged. Because it's good manners and I want them to feel appreciated.

[@milesparris4045]

I made raised beds for my girlfriend. It cost like $40 each. She bought the organic soil she wanted.

[@milessterling1619]

Their married

[@EdgyShooter]

Agree with all your points, even if the solution to the first story is practical, it's still depressing she would have to do that

[@artyomhunter310]

I did the same thing at primary school and secondary school but only for the nice teachers. When I went to sixth form I had some absolutely wonderful teachers for my course so I gave them a box of chocolate each as well as a bottle of there favourite alcoholic beverage’s to say thanks for putting up with me for so long lol.

[@danscga2487]

OP should leave him. Because he sounds like my dad, he always wanted my mom to pay for 50% or more sometimes even for all. SO he could hide money for himself while my mom pay bill, insurence and groseries. He would be constantly argue why SHE should pay or he would just not bring his wallet for dinner or shopping and look at my mom like: Guess you have to pay. They are divorced now (there where more reasons) But this guys sounds like 1to1 like him and this will not end well if he DEMANDS 50% of something he doesnt deserve at all. OP do yourself a favor, check all papers, plan to transfer your business during winter and leave that asshat.

[@smorphous8928]

The 100% story is funny, that husband lost his say in earnings when he scoffed at his wife’s idea of selling flowers.

[@Wittyrose]

For the bus driver story and cookie one; As a nurse trust me we love homemade gifts. I’m sure each bus driver thought that was the most sweetest gift in the world.

[@neffyg35]

With the amount of Karens in this world that seem to find some way to procreate, I bet the bus driver is so happy that atleast one mom isn't a pain in the ass

[@danscga2487]

what a piece of shit husband and his side of family/friends. I mean wtf is so embarrising about this ? If i was a busdriver and this mom would give me cookies, i would make that child the King of this Bus and anyone that is messing with here is messing with me. #cookiesforall

[@rissarea23]

This thread just makes me wish I'd done that for my grade school bus driver. I don't think anyone ever did anything nice for him

[@bryn1063]

That mom was the sweetest person. Why did he get so angry off a gesture? It's not like she asked the bus driver out what's wrong with him?

[@BonnieHalfElven]

My dad brought cookies (that he made) to the ICU nurses after he got out of the hospital.

[@ImSuperBlackMan]

I'm a bus driver, thats so thoughtful of the wife. Honestly most of the time it can feel like a thankless job and when a student or parent does something like that, it just makes our whole day.

[@RiptoGakt]

Agreed. I've been commended, as well as tipped, by some extremely thankful customers for the work I put my ass into at my job. I've been at that job for 15 years thus far; part-time retail/grocery as the guy who does the carts & baskets and such (i.e. garbage and carry-outs, Pandemic added disinfecting carts to those duties), and boy do I get frustrated from some really inconsiderate customers, so it's *very* relieving when people are genuinely grateful for the work I put at that job.

[@zanon__]

1st Story: Uh, yes that is very much grounds for divorce. Remember how he's already "future proofed" himself after his first divorce? Yeah. And now he wants half the profit of something that he has nothing to do with, causes an argument because now it involves "money", then when he apologises, it's just for the fact that he "may have been rude", but not for the fact that he is acting like a leech - you know, like bankers do. Yes, OP should probably start thinking of getting herself a new place to move her flowers to before his "jealousy" that you (RSlash) so much think that she needs to cope with goes from that to literally destroying them when OP remains firm on her stance. OP doesn't have to work anything out with her husband, he's the one that needs to get his shit together. Probably his attitude is why he got a divorce at least once in the first place. 2nd story: any ring can be a wedding ring, doesn't need to be a diamond ring - doesn't even need to have a gemstone. If OP's son doesn't want to get indebted, well, good news! He doesn't have to! Doesn't OP's son work? That logic seems very stupid if he does have a job. 3rd story: Yes, OP and his friends&mom are idiots. Imagine being embarassed because people know you have a good hearted wife. I can understand the wife's logic and behaviour, whether she's shy or not, showing someone appreciation is **actually** a good thing. They're cookies, not a fucking blowjob. 4th Story: OP's husband is an amazing fuckwit. His family didn't respect him in the first place, much less you, why does he care that they were "disrespected"? He needs to grow a spine and a new set of balls. If he's not religious or not within their beliefs, he has nothing to feel ashamed of. What he should be ashamed of is the fact he let them disrespect you and he decided to keep up the charade instead of just saying "yeah we fuck other people. It's a sin for YOU, not for us. Bye."

[@bryn1063]

It's one dispute for the first story, if he keeps going on with it then divorce him. But I'm pretty sure they can just work it out. Don't get me wrong if he keeps arguing and being selfish about it she should leave immediately but if its just one argument about it, that's just a bit dumb. But who knows maybe OP should leave or stay? It's her decision. But let's say he never let it go or was still being like that, then yeah it's time to move on. He's clearly in it for the money and would probably try to claim the company for it. In this case she should leave before he does, maybe hes just a gold digger. But with everything else you commented I agree!

[@bryn1063]

@@aduckofsomesort Yeah, what if he tries to claim more than half?

[@AmyoftheFlowerField]

I'mma dispute the first story. He was an entitled ass, but this can be talked out without getting a divorce. She should get her business set up so that all the assets are in her name alone, therefor he can't get the money. If it persists or he makes a move to obtain the money, then yeah divorce. But currently? No reason.

[@bryn1063]

@@AmyoftheFlowerField I agree! It's just one argument. If he does continue divorce! But right now seems a little much.

[@Corathor]

Except she created the business -after- they got married, so he would get half during the divorce, just like with her name being on the lease, she'd qualify for half the value of the house even though he bought it before they were married.

[@justmeok2]

Id be proud to have a partner that does cookies for the bus driver, establishing good relationships with people in charge of our kids is important.

[@foremanhaste5464]

Once upon a time you were the monster for not giving cookies to the bus driver. Times are changing...

[@TetraSky]

First story : Nope, NTA. Your husband should've had your back from the beginning. He is indeed delusional if he thinks he's entitled to anything when he's not even helping.

[@smol_yote]

Even if he didn’t have high expectations of success, he should have supported his wife and her aspirations, even if it turned out to be a hobby or a phase.

[@oliveraustin9202]

And plus he demands so have someone else success

[@oliveraustin9202]

Without putting in the work to be entitled to pay what a basterd

[@smol_yote]

@@oliveraustin9202 exactly. If I did this to my spouse, I wouldn’t have the balls to demand 50%. I’d rather ask how I could support them and how proud I was of them

[@BeckBeckGo]

If they’re married, it’s marital property. So that’s not entirely true. He’s a total asshole, sure, but the law is technically on his side in a divorce hearing.

[@guilxle]

if the husband wants 50% profits then he can get it, only when he does 50% of the work. Until then, her labour, her gains he sounds like the kind of guy to ask for an open-relationship and get mad when his partner sleeps when someone else

[@SequoyahBaker9596]

Oof, that bus driver one stung a bit.... Whenever my husband and I go out to eat somewhere new he likes to ask for the manager, when we're done eating, to compliment them and their waiters and waitresses. I usually am embarrassed by it and get second hand anxiety from it, but what r/Slash said really got to me. That's my husband's love language and there's nothing for me to be embarrassed about, because they all like to hear when they're doing a good job. I feel so stupid for not realizing that. Shout out to you, good sir. I'll do much better with supporting my husband when he does that and I won't be embarrassed by it anymore. Thank you got opening my eyes to that.

[@GamerSapss]

I mean, you can have it both ways, if your husband is very public about it to the point where it embarasses you, you could ask him to be more subtle about it. Like, if my parents made a spectacle about complimenting waiters/chefs, I would be a lot more embarassed and have a problem with it, rather than them doing something like "you have my sincere gratitude". It's about how you go about it, and you feeling embarrassed is not necessearily stupid, it's just how you process the situation. If you have changed your stance on it, great, but that doesn't mean your feelings before where invalid, and if it was something genuinly bothering you, it could have been a good idea to talk about it

[@jadelee4404]

That's understandable I think. Would you be as embarrassed/anxious if you hadn't been there with your husband but heard that he had done something like that? Is your second hand anxiety more based around your own (possible) anxieties surrounding interacting with strangers?

[@SequoyahBaker9596]

@@GamerSapss I have talked to him about it and he would get more and more confused as to how it embarrassed me. He just does this at places we've never been before. He always explains to the managers why he does this and they're always thankful for good feedback. I've tried suggesting other outlets for him, like giving a review on Google, Facebook, ect., but he prefers do to it in person. It's not a big deal now that I realize that's his love language and the managers and staff usually wind up smiling from ear to ear uncontrollably. I just talked with him about it and he's happy that I finally understand it. Actually, I'm even happy that I understand it better now.

[@SequoyahBaker9596]

@Jade Lee I actually did go to the bathroom the one time to avoid it, but it's silly for me to do that every single time and I don't feel right just leaving him there, it actually makes my anxiety worse. My second hand anxiety in those situations is usually based on how the waitstaff might be feeling when he asks for the manager. He doesn't ever intend on making me, or others, feel anxious. I have a better understanding on it now and I'm really happy that I do. My husband isn't the best at explaining things the way he would in his head, but the second I talked to him about this he was extremely happy because I finally got it.

[@locusxe1411]

So glad you’re getting a new perspective on this. My family when eating out including myself would always thank the wait staff before leaving. There’s no reason to be embarrassed. We should always be grateful and thankful for those aliens us who help others and no good deed or service goes unrewarded

[@nataliaalmeida-nacillustra5954]

The third story: OP should expose the family member that exposed them because to see what they were doing this person probably uses the same platform lol

[@arnoldfossman1701]

I agree!

[@rainsongt189]

I loved that the young couple would "let" the mom keep her wedding band. Mom should have said, "I'll "let" you buy your own ring--just like your father."

[@Someone-or8tp]

the entitlement from the son is unbelievable

[@TKUA11]

Maybe the people from the last story should donate their ring to that couple. Since their marriage means nothing when they sleep around with tons of people, and increasing the spread of Covid and stds

[@lugismansion2400]

@@Someone-or8tp doesn't it sound like that the son is getting manipulated or possibly even abused by his soon to be wife? like why would any son say those rude things to their mothers in the first place?

[@Someone-or8tp]

@@lugismansion2400 the OP didn't mention anything about the fiance except that she was disappointed. I'm sure if it was really the fiancé's masterplan to manipulate him into getting the ring, that she'd react a bit differently. Maybe even indignant. We can't assume abuse from a few words. I don't doubt that she had a hand in planting the idea into the son's head, nor am I completely debunking the idea that she's abusive and manipulative, but at the same time that's not something we can assume with such little information about the relationship between the son and fiance.

[@Someone-or8tp]

@@TKUA11 their marriage still means something. Open relationships are totally fine and if they're polygamous that's okay and has been done throughout history and throughout the animal kingdom. It's their bodies and their marriage. They can do as they please with them. However, I do agree that during the pandemic that's not the best idea. Otherwise, you don't know that they're sireding STDs and you certainly have no right to comment on their sex lives and what that means for their relationship.

[@TimeLady8]

First Story: OP needs to give her husband a copy of "The Little Red Hen." OP is the Little Red Hen.

[@Ajehy]

I thought of the Little Red Hen too!

[@lequicharishbish8679]

Someone else thought it too!!!

[@SuzanneRush]

First story: OP should officially 'wage' herself from the business (time spent growing, caring for, cutting, and arranging), and feel free to be very generous as a 'joined when start-up' bonus. That and all the other expenses, including repaying back personal funds used as 'loans' to the business getting it set up, should come out before *actual* profit is recorded. Then feel free to give him 50% of that. He may be unimpressed, but if he wants a cut of her wages, she gets a cut of his, too.

[@daveo1808]

Perfectly fair, he should also charge her rent

[@TheWeaponshold]

@@daveo1808 She already contributes to half the house... Just no.

[@joseblanco7593]

I advocate for percentage based contribution in relationships. Let's say I make 60% of total salary between me and my SO while they makes 40% of the total salary. So I pay 60% of house expenses and they pay 40% and we each keep whatever is left.

[@GothicElf68]

I like how you think!

[@daveo1808]

I think nm what you do finances need to be sorted beforehand or as they come up, leaving things to guesswork is a bad idea

[@lesleykruijt8580]

Second story: I laughed out loud when the son said "you can keep your wedding band!" Was he gonna ask for that, too?? Lmao

[@shadow4you]

The cookie story really had me scratching my head. How is that embarrassing? I would do the same and my husband would agree it's a generous gift. I've done my share of odd jobs during college and sometimes a little appreciation goes a long way.

[@nataliaalmeida-nacillustra5954]

As a teacher, I'd love to receive cookies like that. Lol

[@stupidlylucas9313]

honestly its far from embarrassing if anything you should be proud shes going out and making people feel like their jobs matter

[@fallenprometheus]

Because it's not like someone they know. You're just giving cookies to a random person, in front of other kids. It also could be misinterpreted. We also don't have the kids take on it but it could lead to some bullying if it's a consistent thing. Overall, it's just plain weird. It's not like doing something nice to some contact workers or people you see everyday at work.

[@noxiouschocolate9644]

@@fallenprometheus but they’re bus drivers, likely people who the parents see every day? So not total strangers?

[@DeannaJacksonDJsDelectables]

I'm a truck driver and the wife is awesome.

[@doodlefawn4742]

My parents worked in a bus garage, my dad was the mechanic but also drove busses. My mom was the dispatcher but would drive the vans. They were always ecstatic to get gifts from the families they drove. They still have drawings and notes that were given to them hung up on the fridge and their offices.

[@Sailor_Enchantix]

When I was in elementary and middle school my mom would make up small things of cookies and/or chocolate covered pretzels for me to give to my teachers before we went on holiday break, and she would always include one for the bus driver. I know it was for the holidays and might be a bit different, but regardless I don’t see the problem. The first day of school seems just as valid a time to give the bus driver a gift as the holidays or any other time.

[@KumiChan2004]

How sad is it that this was the norm 50 years ago. Now it's like people view service workers as nothing more then a mindless drone.

[@bryn1063]

Yeah I feel as if it's just a nice thing to do. I'd do it too!

[@renny7664]

In my cou try we never had school busses. But I'd also give to them like my teachers. I wanted to do it. My mom would've but I brought it up with her one time and she already had gifts made or bought. And I always did that.

[@arnoldfossman1701]

In my family the baked goods went to the whole class including the teachers. My mother was quite inventive too, she would make these little cakes in the cone shaped paper cups which she would ice with green icing and decorate with multi-colored sprinkles looking like little Christmas trees for Christmas. Those were always a hit.

[@BeeWhistler]

@@KumiChan2004 I think these days my main concern is that no one would be willing or allowed to eat something you made at home and I’d understand that, all things considered. But food gifts as appreciate tokens is pretty much standard in school situations, I thought. Not required but never inappropriate.

[@Sapphiresenthiss]

"We contribute equally towards expenses. It's his idea since he *had a divorce* before." Hmmmm... I wonder why this lovely gent had a divorce before... 🤔

[@SamanthaMidgleyIsANerd]

The Cookie bus driver - I can’t imagine how this guy treats service workers, omg

[@danscga2487]

looks like a Daren found Reddit and didn't understand that he is not liked here.

[@southernladyish]

Right?! Jesus Christ.. that one infuriated me. If anyone brought me cookies as a thankful gesture, I’m ngl, I’d probably tear up lol his wife is a damn saint.

[@SamanthaMidgleyIsANerd]

@@southernladyish right?? I'd tear up if ANYBODY brought me cookies. Who doesn't like cookies?!

[@DeadhunterThe]

First Story: Here's an idea, OP: Save the money you're making with this floral business and buy a cheap house with a lot of open ground. Grow your flowers there and turn the house into a big office and shop. That way your husband has no right to complain about you using "his soil." Second Story: Diamonds are overrated. Emeralds and sapphires are much prettier. Heck, I'd be content with a jade engagement ring, to be honest. On a separate note, I know the tradition is "never take off your ring," but you don't want to wear your ring in the shower, wash your hands, do yard work, when you cook, etc. If moisture, dirt, bacteria, and all that stuff are allowed to get under your ring, you're liable to get sick. Especially if you don't wash the area where all that builds up. Please don't wear your ring where it isn't sanitary. Longevity and respect for your health will go a much longer way to respecting your marriage than any piece of metal and stone will. Third Story: This guy's not a butthole, he's a DOUCHE!!! I'd give ANYTHING to share my life with a girl that's so sweet and thoughtful of those that don't get a lot of appreciation save for silly songs from "The Simpsons," and he's trying to convince her that being so sweet is wrong? D-O-U-C-H to the E!!! Fourth Story: Excessively religious people are the worst! They think they're better than everyone and that they have the right to judge others while conveniently forgetting that whole, "Judge not lest ye be judged" proverb. Typically they're only religious when it SUITS them and serves their entitled purposes!

[@shhd2105]

For the bus story: when I was in school multiple kids gave bus drivers gifts on holidays and at the end of year the same as teachers, it's not weird and actually makes alot of them feel good. One time my bus driver even brought us pizza.

[@vzaaa6314]

Man I love bus drivers like that. I remember when I was in highschool hating waking up early for school but I had an awesome bus driver that greeted us with a bright smile and upbeat attitude. She'd joke with us, ask us how we'd been doing, and overall showed that she cared. I may of hated highschool but having that bus driver in the morning and evening made it tolerable.

[@nallyaaaaaa]

your bus driver sounds so nice! reminds me of kindergarten days when our bus driver was very chatty with us :)

[@stephanien6237]

The audacity of Sam and Emily demanding a ring from Sam’s mother! The entitlement is strong with them!

[@stephanien6237]

Why would they *have* to buy a diamond? They are the AH materialistic people. Tell them the ring can become a family heirloom when OP dies, decades from now.

[@TetraSky]

Second story : NTA. They can buy their own rings. There's no need to buy an expensive ring and they can just buy a new one later down the line. It's not a heirloom (yet), it's your choice to keep until you're old. They are delusional. He's the materialistic one for thinking they need diamond even though they say it's a scam.

[@devontehardimon1792]

On top of that it isn't an heirloom unless it's passed down from dead or older people she's not even there yet

[@KWestphal13]

Some of my friends wear rubber rings and they are only a couple bucks and look awesome!

[@austinh1028]

Its crazy they want the ring off her finger. It’s still in-use so she can decide to get another herself, or keep wearing until she dies and it DOES become an heirloom. Selfish son for sure

[@VanMoona]

If they want an inexpensive beautiful ring, some indipendant jewelers have rings from estates. When my husband & I got married he proposed with a lovely ring with my birthstone, but years later when we could afford it we bought a gorgeous bridal set from the 40s. It was 1/2 the price of a new set of similar modern day sets. Basically they have other options.

[@sayadiva123]

@Chris G Etsy too

[@Ajehy]

Story #1 reminds me of the fable of the Little Red Hen. It’s about a hen who finds some wheat seeds in the barnyard, and decides to plant them, mill them, and bake them into bread. Every step she asks the other barnyard animals to help out, but none of them do…until the bread is baked and smells amazing. They all want a slice, but she tells all of them that they didn’t help her, so she’s not giving them a single crumb.

[@viirinsoftworks1304]

Ring Story: The fact that these people revealed their status privately while also asking about the ring, sounds like they aren't actually fiances, they just want to hit the pawn shop.

[@fdm2155]

Or they want the prestige of an expensive ring with the cost! If diamonds are a 'scam' why do you want a diamond engagement ring? Hypocrites.

[@velvety2006]

'they say i still have my weddingband' why do I suspect that when they get married they suddenly want mom's wedding band too?

[@dx1450]

@@velvety2006 Well of course, it matches the engagement ring! Can't break up a set!

[@Nurse_Lucy]

I think flower OP needs to start "shopping" more and by shopping, I really mean having a secret nest egg of cash somewhere safe and away from the house

[@gerrard1144]

OP: my flower business Husband: *Our* flower business OP, you are NTA. It's your business, and you both have your own salaries, so it's still your business. Husband gets 2.5/5 BH points

[@CaptainTom_EW]

**insert bugs bunny meme here** OUR FLOWER BUSINESS

[@saydtanvirkaiser3144]

*Communism*

[@sepro5135]

I mean RSlash had a point though, it was for example also MacKenzie Bazos‘ business. Gotta be consistent. But yeah, the husband is a completely out of line.

[@shyrastacy3127]

My older brother actually DiD ask our mom for her house. Then he forced her out of it. He put his name on the title as a 2ND owner and kicked her out. Now he claims he owns his own home, car, land ect but in reality he stole a house, never paid for his car, and the house is on family land belonging to our grandmother. He never asked for anything, he demanded and took it. I get dozens more of these stories about his entitlement daily. Perks of a sociopath in the family

[@this_is_a_tiny_town]

I'm going to award him 5/5 AHs

[@Callsign-Konig]

10:40 "Oh no,my kid is giving hard workers baked things! Whatever shall I do?!" Wtf is wrong with this guy???

[@jordynann1830]

At winter break and the end of the year, I always give my son's bus drivers gifts to thank them. They connect with the kids and care for them. They should be appreciated.

[@Eis_Cold]

The son wanting the ring and saying that diamonds are a scam is telling her that to guilt her into giving it away

[@lugismansion2400]

while i agree with you doesn't it sounds like that Emily is manipulating Sam when their alone? like why would Sam ask for his mother's ring and not Emily?

[@Huan.jpeg_qwq]

@@lugismansion2400 Sounds like Sam just wanted a diamond ring to impress Emily or smth.

[@seth4bucks]

For the engagement ring, I do think the fiancé deserves a asshole score for asking. She had to know what was going on and it really put OP in an awkward position to have to say no. It could've been worse if they had asked in public, like at a family gathering or something. But her presence during the asking put additional pressure on the OP to say yes.

[@fendviyo]

That last guy is completely spineless for not sticking up for his wife. NTBH

[@neffyg35]

He backed her into a corner and didn't even give her to a rope to get out! He got what he deserved

[@sepro5135]

I give her at best a very close NTA. Her husband sure didn’t act like an adult, but neither did she. He left her under the bus and he is an AH for that but she dragged him unnecessarily down there too. That she said that they were swingers was no problem, but the additional detail was just petty, if not spiteful. He deserved it but I don’t feel sorry for how she was treated either after how she acted.

[@Daedindalin]

@@sepro5135 nah, I disagree. I am not about to expect someone to remain the bigger person when they’re repeatedly yelled at and called a whore. Throw it ALL in their face and cut them out. No one needs trash family like that.

[@I_THE_ME]

4:40 Legally, the owner of the business is the person who has their name on the paper as the owner of the business. If the ownership of the company is shared, then the documentation will show that.

[@sepro5135]

Well… tell that to Jeff Bazos, just to name a famous case. Yes the business is hers but the money is theirs. The money earned during a marriage is usually unless you have a prenup split 50/50 in a divorce. So technically, he has a point… ish but he’s still a jerk.

[@25_nishita45]

@@sepro5135 his wife did help him with the business tho

[@sepro5135]

@@25_nishita45 Surely a bit, but nothing remotely to warrent what she got

[@tishahavard9727]

So my ring is a cz and my husband got it for me two years ago. I actually found it at Walmart and it was so beautiful and so unique that I pointed it out to him and told him I didn't want a diamond. He surprised me with it after pretending that he was going to get me a diamond anyway and even let me have a fake argument with him about it. So r/ is absolutely right. You don't have to have a diamond to make a lot of women happy. It's the thought, beauty, and experience around the ring that made makes me love it. So yeah, get a cz if you don't wanna go into debt buying a real diamond. That is, IF YOU'RE NOT MATERIALISTIC, lol. Don't try and con someone out of their precious ring that their husband gave to them. Idc what the relation is. That's NOT YOURS. Trust me, a cz can be just as beautiful and cherished as a real diamond.

[@katieb9428]

I love this! Thank you! My fiancé gave me an aquamarine engagement ring. It belonged to his grandmother (who passed some time ago), but was resized to fit me. I absolutely love it and do get many compliments on it. However I have met people who are like “I wouldn’t’ve accepted it because it isn’t a Diamond.” Honestly I don’t care what they say and think it’s absolutely stupid to base your entire relationship around a ring. There are so many things that are more important like how much you love each other

[@paintdgryphon5414]

My ring is a silver Claddagh. Monetarily, it's not worth much. But exactly what you said, it's the thought, beauty, and experience. I adore my ring, and we didn't go into debt for it

[@rainsongt189]

When my husband and I got engaged, he suggested we go to a jeweler to pick out the engagement ring together. I told him I'd rather have a refrigerator. We did order my wedding band but it wasn't delivered until after our wedding. Five months or so after we were married, he machined a steel bolt into a ring for me. It has a heart in the middle. To be honest, that ring means more to me than any diamond ever could. I still wear it 43 years later.

[@winterspectre]

@@rainsongt189 that is so sweet oh my

[@nataliaalmeida-nacillustra5954]

We decided for no rings. We met at karate when we were young and we both have the habit of not wearing jewelry of any kind because we had to take them off back then (a punch hurts a lot more with rings on lol). We've opted for a red ribbon ceremony at the wedding.

[@moniquethong798]

Every year, when Mid-Autumn comes, I make loads of Mooncakes to be given to friends, family, neighbours and all the people who had helped me through the year(s). My husband also benefits from this since he shares with his colleagues and bosses. He always tells me of all the compliments that he gets from the Mooncakes and he always says that with a proud smile. A husband shud never be ashamed of u for being a kind n generous person.

[@gerrard1144]

Wife: *give gifts to driver* Me: aww thats so nice OP: ew that's embarrasing OP, i have to give you 4.5/5 BH here, you sound so mean. Your wife isn't doing anything wrong, she's doing something nice. And it's not embarassing either, we need more people like your wife.

[@oliveraustin9202]

What is he really arguing here That she is finding happiness in her life that it makes her happy Dude get a life your wife is someone who deserves a better man

[@thisishowitends]

I'm not gonna lie, I would be really uncomfortable, anxious, and embarrassed by something like this. It would feel like she's making a bit of a spectacle because she's doing something people don't normally do. Logically, that probably wouldn't happen, but that's what it would feel like, and I hate being anywhere near a center of attention. But I wouldn't discourage my wife from doing it. It's a genuinely nice thing to do, and it shouldn't be shut down just because I'm a weirdo.

[@ronrolfsen3977]

I am a shy person and easily embarrassed. But if someone gave me cookies it would make me happy and nothing awkward about it. Even if I would not eat it because she is a stranger and I had trust issues. I would throw them away, but it's just that someone went out of their way to do something nice that counts.

[@Bottleofwater-n5y]

Okay, let's see, hypotetically a Total stranger Gives you cookies, How would you feel? How do you know the stranger isn't triyng to drug you? No offense, but think before you speak

[@wimsylogic65]

@@thisishowitends Stuff like that used to be a lot more common. Particularly out in the country.

[@trying2.073]

I drive a school bus and getting gifts from my riders or their parents makes my month🤗

[@masterme1337]

2nd story I'd give Emily 1/5 Wanting it as a token of being accepted into the family is implying she hasn't been or doesn't see that she is. It's a red flag that further manipulation is present or should be wary for.

[@amycaires8499]

I’m going with 3/5 for her, because of the emotional manipulation. It’s not a red flag. It’s a precursor to the shit she’s going to pull in the future. You know she’s already eyeballing the in-laws to pay for the wedding, help them buy a home, help pay for expenses when she’s pregnant, perform in home childcare for the grandkids, and will hold their ability to see her son or grandchildren over her head to get what she wants.

[@yomitakano284]

With the bus driver one.... My mom is a bus driver and absolutely loves when the kids give her small presents, such as with the homemade cookies. It's a little iffy with covid for that stuff, but very sweet. I myself would give teachers and bus drivers homemade cookies around Christmas time and see no issue or reason someone should feel embarrassed by it.

[@thelordstarfish]

Story 3: I like how it was pretty clear what side you were gonna land on just from how whiny you read "She ignored how I felt!"

[@MysticStar_8161]

For the story about the shy wife, I hope she keeps baking and giving. I bake chocolate chip cookies, from scratch and I give them as Christmas gifts. My friends and family love them. They are made with love.

[@alpine2752]

:Cool, anyways here’s a recipe for brownies: 1/2 cup butter 2 eggs 1 cup sugar 1/3 cup cocoa powder 2 teaspoon vanilla extract 1/2 cup flour

[@Yuki42_]

Thanks, I am going to try this in the morning. 11pm here in Australia :)

[@alpine2752]

@@Yuki42_ thats pretty late

[@Ok-yp4ye]

Im gonna try it one day :P

[@erickm119]

Bake for how long? Thanks

[@alpine2752]

@@Ok-yp4ye do

[@SuperExodian]

the only time it's okay to "pass on" a wedding ring would be when either you've been widowed and your say, grandchild is gonna get married, it might be nice to see it used again. or alternatively, after you've passed, giving it as an inheritance.

[@fnafnightcore7084]

YESSS I watch these every day. When I'm in a depressive episode and I don't feel like doing anything I listen and get stuff done

[@SageLion.]

Why get stuff done , sit and listen to this golden video and drink this lemonade 🍹

[@GarfiekdKartGo]

Same. I’ve been watching since winter 2019. It puts me into a certain mood

[@oliveraustin9202]

I concur

[@TKUA11]

Talk shows and radio are a thing too

[@13BGunBunny]

"And no one wants a stretched (_*_)" You're killing me!! 🤣🤣

[@daleA91]

On the first story. If the husband didn't contribute to the company he has no stake in it, so is entitled to none of it.

[@TheFlyingClutchman]

That's not how it works in the event of a divorce lmao

[@daleA91]

@@TheFlyingClutchman true, but I wasn't speaking from a legal stand point, the husband demanded half of the money from the business without putting anything in to it so deserves nothing, he's entitled to nothing.

[@daleA91]

@Chris G firstly it's completely different as they both work. Secondly and again this is from civilly and moral point, even in legal terms the assets would belong to her if the husband was on none of the paperwork, in a divorce the husband would have no claim on the assets, but the wife would lose rights to other shared assets.

[@TheFlyingClutchman]

@@daleA91 maybe. But by that logic if a man builds a business while his wife works a normal job, and due him earning more she asks him to give her some money would you say since she didn't help build the business she is entitled to nothing? I think demanding a 50% split is silly unless they separate but he defo has the right to ask for a bit of money.

[@daleA91]

@@TheFlyingClutchman the word "entitled" is a powerful word meaning "what she deserves". In this example, no she isn't "entitled" to anything, however you'd likely still give them money out of courtesy. In the stories video the husband "demanded" not asked for money he wasn't "entitled" to.

[@andlien2175]

Imagine being embarrassed that your wife does good things for underappreciated people. Like, how do you care more about your reputation than being kind to others??

[@smashlegend25]

“ Why Is He Calling Him Materialistic When He’s Looking For Materials. “ This Is The Best Thing RSlash Has Ever Said.

[@seanshanleyAnimeUWLPer]

"No one want's a stretched butthole" Uhh..... Rslash? Don't be surprised if this gets demonetized later on....

[@royalteaanimations]

First story: if the guy wants his “fair share” he shouldn’t be upset with getting zero lol. It’s certainly fair

[@TetraSky]

Fourth story : Ah, yes the mega religious with a husband who doesn't back you up. NTA. He should've 100000% had your back on that one. He didn't. So you spilled the bean. He reaped what he sowed.

[@macuss87]

LMFAO I was distracted when I heard this line. OMFG "How are you embarrassed, because of something she did with the bus driver." out of contextm that line, is well...

[@bourbonbiscuits8729]

its like being an artist and ur husband says "this wont work" and when it starts to take off cause of all ur hard work he wants 50% of the profit cause its his paper ur drawing on

[@TKUA11]

Idk it’s a complicated story. They are married legally so they literally own half of all their assets, marriage he consequences. Maybe the solution is for him to contribute half the work to the business and they can share the proceeds

[@missluciddreams3472]

I agree...I would tell him to pound sand

[@JKrain02]

Ah yes. But when women seperate they EXPECT 50% even if they didn't do anything. Marriage means that everything is both of yours TOGETHER. The moment when you decide that you money is yours and their money is theirs,your on your way out of the relationship.

[@Tues48]

@@JKrain02 don't say women as if only women expect to leave with half of whatever business. It's whoever is the most earner expects those more. In our modern age the wage disparity between couples have changed. The woman can earn more or the man. It's not always just women

[@missluciddreams3472]

@@JKrain02 speak for yourself...I don't expect shit if I ever got a divorce and I didn't get shit in my last divorce.

[@belleaur]

Holy shit, as a bus driver, I will tell you that we absolutely love gifts! Snacks are always appreciated!! We love and care for your children, giving a thank you gift is never wrong.

[@shaywilson2971]

When i was younger, during summer breaks I used to stay up late just to leave hot coffee and snacks for our trash pickup people every week. They loved it.

[@BeckBeckGo]

My neighbour did that when she retired. Her husband also pretended to be Santa and crept around the neighbourhood after dark on Christmas Eve jingling bells and “accidentally” getting spotted by any kids peeking out their window. If he saw a kid looking, he’d just put his finger to his lips like “shhh…” and then kept walking. They were the best! You are too :)

[@dandotvid]

If buying an engagement ring is going to put you into debt, either you're looking for something way too expensive or you're not financially secure enough to get married anyway.

[@daliyashohat1320]

The wife in the 3rd story sounds like me! I love showing appreciation to those who deserve it. There's NOTHING wrong with it!

[@plannedsarcasm6930]

The way he said "She ignored how I felt" had me laughing for like 6 mins

[@cat_clawz9473]

When I was in elementary school, my brother and I used to make little decorations for fall or Christmas (with the help of our mom) and hand them out to our teacher and the bus driver. They really liked them! My mom is still friendly with my elementary school bus driver and many of the teachers even now, and I'm in college!

[@l.francesca4780]

"Diamonds are a scam! How could you let us go into debt to buy a whole new ring?!" Uh, don't buy a diamond ring then? Lab-grown sapphires are WAY cheaper, they come in any color you want, they're the second-hardest gem after diamond so they're not likely to get chipped or damaged, and if you get them in clear/white, they look just like diamonds for a fraction of the price. Anywhere from a couple hundred to a thousand dollars if you get it in a silver band. If you think diamonds are a scam (they are, diamond corporations are a virtual monopoly and artificially inflate prices and a diamond ring will ALWAYS sell for less than you paid for it.) then just don't buy diamonds? There's literally no rule that says you must have an engagement ring or the wedding isn't real. There's no rule that said your wedding ring has to be diamond or the wedding isn't real. You can marry your spouse and exchange ring pops. It literally doesn't matter. But if you want jewelry because pretty and expensive rocks matter to you... buy lab-grown sapphires.

[@EdgyShooter]

"To workers she assumes aren't appreciated" Hmm I think I can sense the kind of person OP is already...

[@jenniferespinosa-blas3471]

For the wedding ring story: get a lab grown white sapphire. They're almost as hard as diamonds and less expensive. And no one can tell the difference

[@MissMusicQueen101]

First story: OP that sounds like some major red flags. He sounds like a man child. Run.

[@shara7715]

Wym run lol, they're fucking married

[@etcetera1995]

That's not a manchild. That's a warning for financial abuse. Still throw out the whole ass man, though.

[@this-is-alliecat]

The bus driver one is so wholesome. When I was a kid I would give my bus drivers a small bag of candy on the first and last day of school. Their smiles made me feel good

[@smaragdatsiachta]

if I was a bus driver I would LOVE to get cookies

[@songohan3321]

As would I. OP in this story and the idiots that agreed with him needs to jump in a cold lake. That would at least let them feel something.

[@ricochet0928]

Bus story: OP is just jealous he didn't get any cookies 😂

[@EdgyShooter]

"It always matters when money is involved" Hell of a red flag there

[@RealCoolstriker64]

Not really? You mean to tell me if you’re SO multiplied her annual income you wouldn’t wanna know how that aspect of your relationship changed?

[@EdgyShooter]

@@RealCoolstriker64 No the point is, he gave zero craps about it right up until she started to make money. Shows he doesn't care about her passions, something is only important to him when money is involved

[@badwolfrose001]

When I had my surgery, I went out and bought a bunch of cookies and brownies and stuff (All in sealed containers from the store cause its Covid and I wanted them to know I purchased it, what's inside is safe, and that they can trust it.) And I took it back up there once I felt a little better and gave it to the staff in the OR to thank them for taking care of me and making sure I was ok. Granted I'm southern, but I just assumed this was something people did to say thank you and show we apricate what others do. Who doesn't like getting goodies and knowing they made a difference to someone?

[@myopinion69420]

i agree, diamonds are a scam, but why, after bringing up that fact would you imply that you would still have to buy a diamond ring?

[@fdm2155]

Apparently diamonds are only a scam if you have to buy one with your own money! OP thinks it's fine if he can manipulate his mother into giving him a diamond ring.

[@tiff3770]

Emeralds are not because they are rare like rubys

[@islippedonsoap]

Story #2 pissed me off. Before my fiancé and I got engaged we agreed that we didn’t want him to go crazy on a ring because of how expensive they can be and that no matter what it was I’ll love it. He proposed last month and he picked out a gorgeous morganite ring that I absolutely love and cherish. It doesn’t need to be a diamond and no one should have to break the bank or harass family over a ring.

[@ydrahkcin]

"Diamonds are a SCAM" So why do you want her DIAMOND? Why not just get a cheap crystal ring that looks like a diamond?

[@neilgilsdorf1115]

Go to a pawn shop. They always have rings Also, as a bus driver, the husband sounds like the type of parent who runs my stop sign because “He’s in a hurry, and that’s not a real stop sign anyway.”

[@arkoffives9047]

3rd story: OP does not deserve his wife.

[@ninjabluefyre3815]

It's like if Rabbit somehow married Kanga, it just doesn't make any sense.

[@TKUA11]

That’s why they all share each other around in a carousel. Sleeping around with tons of people is not only a bad thing to do in a marriage; but also a good way to spread stds and covid

[@arkoffives9047]

@@TKUA11 While I agree with you, I'm talking about the 3rd story with the wife that gives gifts as a way of saying thank you.

[@jesileigh]

My husband and I were incredibly poor when we got engaged in our *very* early 20s and we picked my engagement ring out (it has 3 tiny diamonds and a white gold band) at the pawn shop for $120. You only go into debt for that stuff if you want to go into debt.

[@meepthescorpio6367]

Op of the first story should probably divorce, because that is not very manly to say that he deserves the profit of what SHE made and what He didn't support,idk just saying lol... Nice Video by the way,as always,R Slash

[@baldaction3510]

Yes it's way to much womanly ;)

[@irogt]

It's a HUGE red flag. And whne it comes to business family doesn't automatically become co-founders.

[@meepthescorpio6367]

@@baldaction3510 Not that type of manly,I meant cowardly...oh well ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[@meepthescorpio6367]

@Jеrеmy Hutсhins 🅥 No, don't even

[@ramenbomberdeluxe4958]

@@baldaction3510 Okay sexist :/

[@z0nra]

I work in retail and I FUCKING LOVE IT when customers give gifts as thanks for some reason. Heck, I helped a lady buy supplies for her baking business and she brought me cupcakes the next day!!! They were delicious! And now I follow her business on FB and I'm going to order some cupcakes for the next holiday because I love supporting local businesses.

[@Twinklethefox9022]

With the bus driver story. I remember when I was in school, my grandma told me to write Christmas cards to all the teachers and the bus driver. And the bus driver I had, would wait for me to get to my house before waiting. He didn't have to do that, he could have just left the moment I walked off the bus.

[@tristinmckinstry6467]

As soon as I heard OP in the bus driver story say that his wife just "assumed" that workers are underappreciated, I knew where that was going.

[@xlifexwithxlithiumx]

The wife cooking cookies is amazing ! I would be so happy !!! She’s an amazing person

[@TKUA11]

I thought RSlash was pushing all this vaccine and mask stuff onto everyone. And only NOW it’s ok to introduce a vector for transmission of bacteria and viruses?

[@LoyalTako]

For the bus driver story my mom used to do that all the time my bus drivers loved it. Everyone deserves to be appreciated

[@Caffeinatedwife]

Rings don't have to be expensive, my husband's and my rings came from Costco

[@untitled_2935]

Costco has the best items when you need it

[@kinzobean6468]

Mine was $120 from Etsy and my husband's was $34 from Walmart

[@JediLadyMisty]

My husband and I spent probably a hundred on our rings. We bought them off Amazon.

[@daedubois9428]

Re: the engagement ring Did OP give her son everything he ever asked for in his life? Except her engagement ring? Just curious how a person thinks they have a right to another's engagement ring

[@smol_yote]

Kudos to the wife in the 3rd story for showing appreciation to the working middle class!

[@Bottleofwater-n5y]

A stranger Gives you cookies, would you actually accept them? I would feel creeped out, what if the cookies are drugged?

[@smol_yote]

@@Bottleofwater-n5y I’d personally doubt they are drugged. If I was a bus driver and a parent offered me cookies, unless the parent gave me a weird vibe I’d accept them.

[@smol_yote]

If I didn’t want to eat the cookies I’d just save them and throw them out later. But it’s polite to accept a gift and take it rather than decline it

[@MarioLandscape]

@@Bottleofwater-n5y. You seem to have the attitude that when people give out food, they are most likely trying to drug you. Let's put that into perspective. *From the perspective of the giver:* There's someone who drives your kid in their bus. And you try to drug them. They've not done anything bad to you in the past. Does that make any sense to you? *From the perspective of the receiver:* If you've never met someone before, and you do a good service for them, and so they give you some cookies, but you decline and feel creeped out, believing they were drugged. They show no signs of being a psychopath or a sociopath. They seem genuine. Does that make any sense to you? You also seem to believe that it would be embarrassing, and that the husband was correct. (Based on the other comments you've spammed on comments that supported the wife) Let's put that into perspective too: *From the perspective of the giver's partner:* Your partner gave the bus driver of your kids some cookies to show her thanks. You feel embarrassed. Does that make any sense to you?

[@autobotrock4789]

His wife is super nice for gifting the bus drivers. As a mail carrier with some less than appreciative customers, it makes my day to have a pleasant interaction and especially when they offer gifts. My mom was a bus driver for a time and some of the kids were so disrespectful to her for no reason. I bet she would have been very grateful if a parent gave her cookies as thanks.