SafeType keyboard review (seriously, what the hell)

[@mataznuiz]

His typing speed went from 70 words per minute to one word on occasion

[@Chyrosran22]

xD

[@ZILtoid1991]

That's the typing speed of a beginner computer user, who's not very interested in this "very new technology", but needs to use one for "e-mailing".

[@Liggliluff]

Let's count. The first letter was typed at 9:49, last character at 15:21 It's 39 words and 194 characters. It took 332 to complete. That is 7 words per minute, and 35 characters per minute.

[@Jossandoval]

Is this "words on occasion" an imperial unit for writing speed?

[@astro-sq6tb]

Yay I get 65 words per minute

[@SOLIZ.]

Where are the blinkers?

[@SundownMarkTwo]

It's obviously a BMW model, seeing as it doesn't come with any.

[@unknown96565]

@@SundownMarkTwo BRUH *E60 M5 reliability intensifies*

[@Visidan]

this monstrosity is cursed to forever look at itself in the mirror

[@Blazikenpwnsyou]

Not just one, but two for its face's halves to each look at.

[@PassTheSnails]

“This thing is so ugly that if I drew a painting of it, the painting would hang ITSELF” +1

[@Soei23]

I thought that was the most epic line in this vid. Thomas, you should TM that shit!

[@alienmachine]

I laughed so much on that!

[@derek790]

Top 10 list for this keyboard: 10. Layoffs are imminent and you want productivity to drop after your gone. Order a hundred of these for your employees and mandate their usage. 9. Your state DMV announces their "Stopping Carpal Tunnel Syndrome" campaign is in full swing and switch to this keyboard at your local DMV office. 8. You announce a typing test for the job position and sit the user at the desk with this keyboard. Nobody passes. 7. You sneer at your co-worker's ergonomic keyboard and tell them you're a true masochist and then start typing on this keyboard. 6. Hasbro decides to make a Transformer based on this thing. It's evil of course. 5. You tint the mirrors for a stealth look and add LED lighting. You also add a sticker, “I brake for Space Bars.” 4. Ask the company that produced this if they have a Dvorak layout. You just can't do Qwerty. 3. Ask the company to make a wireless portable tenkeyless RGB gaming version. You also want power mirrors. 2. You decide to pair this with a vertical mouse and vow to never hold your hands horizontal again. 1. George R.R. Martin says he switching to this keyboard to quickly finish his next book.

[@skid7666]

Because you didn't mention it I thought I should. This keyboard had a featuring role in Parks and Recreation as Donna's keyboard when Chris Traeger changes the office in the episode "The Bubble"

[@FindecanorNotGmail]

"I don't fly a Space Ship"

[@voodoolilium]

wasn't it also in the first Men In Black movie?

[@gainsborough25]

I was going to post this! You beat me to it!

[@skid7666]

@@voodoolilium I gotta re-watch it now. I'll keep an eye out

[@katiev41611]

Parks and Rec is how I ended up here lol

[@Banom7a]

that mirror is for you to check around in case you're watching NSFW and someone's behind

[@jasondoe2596]

So... this whole keyboard-like contraption is just an elaborate excuse to have adjustable mirrors in front of you? It now makes sense!

[@hjalfi]

Just cut out the middleman, and use the mirrors to watch someone's behind.

[@Liggliluff]

@@hjalfi Just cut out that middleman too, and just watch someone's behind right away.

[@Uncasted]

Chyros: "WANING" Me: My happiness is inmeasurable, and you made my day.

[@camelCased]

Such typos are inevitable after using the keyboard that is the subject of this video.

[@fabiodlx]

Chyrosran cursing on a keyboard is my favorite Christmas gift.

[@BertGrink]

What a coincidence, i had the same thought :D He's the most inventive swearer i've ever seen or heard hehe. I love it, love it I FUCKING LOVE IT! DO YOU UNDERSTAND? No offense intended! Greetings from Denmark.

[@CharlesHydronium]

Merry Christmas

[@WolvenSpectre]

The reason that the SafeType is set the way it is it relieves pain of a very specific but very very uncommon RSI (the opposite of the one I got in IT Training). The thing is if I used it for my RSI it would have made it massively worse and more painful. Also if you follow the seating position that I have seen on their materials you can cause an RSI. This piece of crap is actually made to be practically used in your lap or if you sit on a raised stool because to work your upper arms are supposed to be near vertical and your forearms are suppose to be nearly parallel with your legs. No office is set up for that so they show something more common but not correct. It is like they started making it serious and gave up half way through.

[@phoenix0166]

More like they gave up when they started. They had a decent idea but didn’t give a crap after

[@nitroraptor5316]

*The **-guillotine-** the keyboard*

[@quadrata8382]

The the keyboard?

[@aCivilServant]

Remember when Homer Simpson was left alone to design that car? This looks like another one of his concoctions!

[@shadowmanwkp]

You can't measure typing speed on this monstrosity with keystrokes per minute, you need minutes per keystroke.

[@Freyakv]

Donna from Parks and Rec brought me here

[@theclipsposter]

How

[@ryandevan2793]

oh my fucking lord, please don't tell me someone but Thomas used this thing!

[@Freyakv]

An Pier she uses it in the show

[@mosk11tto]

When you see "seriously, what the hell" in the title you just know it's gonna be a HIIIDEOUS one

[@Forcy1989]

I busted out laughing the first seconds when I noticed the side mirrors 😂

[@aidanyunus]

"apocalyptic dingleberry' i see that James May reference

[@unknown96565]

Oh c*ck

[@davidbt98]

"It's terrible, you'll love it!" Just superb.

[@mikolajm6354]

Him calling someone a human questionmark is the best thing I've heard all week 7:27

[@plate4416]

Honestly, if this had Alps SKCM Ambers, the keyboard would only be slightly worse than the breast implant pancake.

[@0name933]

We all would tear this thing apart and save the Ambers from this miniature 9/11 twin towers because using it would make us want to smash it harder that the planes did.

[@karellen00]

It would be amazing because you could harvest the switches without worrying for the donor keyboard!

[@SockyNoob]

@@karellen00 exactly lol

[@nicolasreed21]

Marco Toselli That number of SKCM ambers will cost $200 max, the keyboard still costs $300

[@tornadomimicyclone6707]

If it came with Beam Springs, it would ONLY be on the level of badness of Smith Corona Leaf Springs.

[@Roanoak]

It's called Safetype because it forces you to type so slow you couldn't possibly get plastic burn or lose friends on social media because you can't possibly type snap opinions about posts, you have to think long and hard if you want to even take the time to respond.

[@wargamingrefugee9065]

I wish you had used Word 2003. I wanted to see Clippy cry.

[@nathanlamaire]

How hard it would be if they put hand rest on both sides for more "ergo" and more "safe" typing. I can feel the pain imagining typing on it. They left off the most important feature here.

[@mzens5061]

No one: Art teacher when she sees ur work: 8:54

[@patr1ck28]

As soon as I saw this keyboard on my screen, I thought "Time to get popcorn!"

[@logansorenssen]

I'm having nightmares of an office where some galaxy-brain-wannabe manager decrees that everyone shall use these for Optimal Health (TM)!

[@SimonBauer7]

this is the time when i will just bring my own keyboard

[@czdot]

I enjoy your profanity. I'm fluent in English and I learned to swear from South Park but this is filthy music for my ears. This video is pure gold just like one with the worst switches. Absolute delight. ♥️

[@JamesBarcus]

Shouldn't this keyboard have been pushed off the cliff and follow Wile E. Coyote? Beep Beep!

[@SteveChisnall]

possibly…

[@iProgramInCpp]

I love how the intro is zoomed in, and that the waning text just says "ergonomic keyboard" LOL.

[@JL-ef7bh]

Love it when you say "HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDIOUS!".

[@Soei23]

Disclaimer in the beginning? EXTREME profanity? NOT for the fainthearted? [getting popcorn] [headphones on] BRING IT ON!!! Got interrupted so I couldn't watch right away but this is hands down the funniest sweara-thon I've heard you say. I'm getting the VHS tape as soon as it is available!

[@Sortsylic]

We need Chyros vs James Rolfe swearing battle

[@elijahbyoun7719]

4:31 Thank me lAter

[@Sortsylic]

One of those videos where you can hear the clock ticking through the typing demo since the keystrokes are sooooo occasional

[@fryfry377]

It looks like someone put more thought into how to store the mirrors than how well they actually work.

[@MrMorganwatch]

Finally found your endgame, eh Chyrosran22?

[@stopthephilosophicalzombie9017]

MrMorganwatch Keyboard from the 5th circle of hell

[@Crynok]

"Some people doubtlessly get comfort from using it, just like some people get pleasure from eating poop." The way you can actually agree with something while simultaneously insulting it is amazing.

[@Toti_111]

I really like the fact that you put the time stamp on the description, cheers m8

[@MrFreeze79]

well, on a positive note, at least you cant drop food in half your keyboard.

[@daviddavidsonn3578]

0:12 "waning" is that the Scottish way to say warning?

[@funnybanana6396]

Oy vey

[@raulsaavedra709]

@8:56 "It's so ugly that if I printed a picture of it, it would hang itself!" HAhahahaaaaaaaahhhahahaha

[@alisterfolson]

That Parks and Recreation video brought me here...I thought it was a prop

[@gmandelling6901]

From what I know form my school years SafeType keyboards were only used by court reporters. It had some benefits they only took this monster instead of steno typewriter + keybaord for a laptop it took less space on the desk relative to the normal setup. It was cheaper. and the layout was better than steno typewriter (apparently). The mirrors are only used at the start to place the hands in usually standard position for the writer. But this type of keyboard was not popular in the west but they were quite popular in the ex soviet union satellites.

[@alexeiz]

A pair of electrodes you attach to your nipples to receive a joyful 1000 volt electroshock impulse every time you make a mistake would complete a masochistic experience of typing on this torture device rather nicely.

[@GothTwink2330]

I'm down to one word on this spaceship keyboard and that word is perpebisqlewp.

[@foolslayer9416]

Parks and Rec brought me here. I was wondering what this monstrosity was....

[@PhilipAlexanderHassialis]

"It's terrible - you 'll love it" Oh Thomas, you know your audience so well :D

[@MoraFermi]

The wrist position may be "relaxed" but without any kind of wrist support, the arm muscles are definitely *not* relaxed. I wouldn't be surprised if extensive use of this keyboard did not cause some new type of RSI-like injury.

[@MarcusWolschon]

Why would you loose your keys? The F and J are embossed for 10 finger typing like on any other keyboard. So you can always feel your way to the rest position without looking.

[@delphicdescant]

So close to true greatness, but then they decided to go with staggered rows for some reason. Shame.

[@JackOfHarts96]

"It looks like something I would draw with my left hand" I don't know why, but something about that one tickled me so hard.

[@bashisobsolete.pythonismyn6321]

In a genuine ergonomic comparison, safetype ranked poorly. In normal human anatomy, a comfortable hand position is half way between flat and vertical. The tendons around the wrist and forearm are connected in such a way. Safetype requires effort to keep the hands raised in a karate chop position. It simply transfers strain to a different part of the wrist.

[@NoEntertainment]

Let's be real here the fact that you filmed this with a shittier camera than normal gives this keyboard the treatment it deserves

[@raulsaavedra709]

Here are two of the world-class design brain farts that took place in making this contraption: [1] It's so much better to keep your wrists vertically, but let's leave half the keys not only horizontally, but in the valley between our two "key-walls". So we still leave half the keys just as on any other horizontal keyboard on the planet, with the added feature of making those horizontal keys ridiculously impractical and slow to reach from hands at their ergo positions outside our "keywalls." This way everyone will appreciate so much more every time they type on our keywalls instead of on the old-style "valley", and we can lay claim to introducing these new words: keywalls, and keyvalley, totally revolutionizing and overpowering the very obsolete and limited "keyboard". [2] Users might think it will be difficult to get adjusted to using this "typing device" (stressing that it's not just a "board" anymore, because it's so much more than that), so we have to break that initial reservation. For that we will include mirrors for alleged visibility and typing ease, but those will just be clever negative training devices. Perfectly designed to discourage dependence on them, we'll place them close enough, and make them narrow enough to allow quite limited visibility, and also we will not allow them to rotate vertically, although they will have some other degrees of movement freedom, just not vertical rotation. This way the users will need to rotate their neck and eyes a lot side to side, and in some cases they'll even move their bodies and reposition their heads in order to really see anything with our mirrors. We can also leave some key orientation as the original boards, some others we will reorient with the lettering facing up the wall. All of this of course is not ergonomic at all, and inadvertently the users will start to progressively avoid depending on visibility of the keys. But the mirrors will be there from the start, so new users will have that tangible guarantee that our device is very easy to get adjusted to, that visibility on our keywalls is such a non-problem for sure.

[@jacobjames5536]

I'm insulted that you compared this keyboard to the human organ known as the appendix. It's a better organ than this is a keyboard.

[@blendernoob64]

Just like with the Maltron Typing Bowl keyboard, the ticking clock during the typing demo was so hilarious lol

[@vulduv]

2:00 they dont. they look more like the mirrors you would find on an old american semi truck from the 70's

[@hardkorehak]

My department wanted to see this keyboard in action - your review earned you a subscriber for life.

[@StrangerCoug]

You know it's an incredibly awful keyboard when it takes a keyboard fanatic 5 minutes and 41 seconds to type 195 characters (counting the space after the end).

[@damnhotcoffee]

Let's be honest sir, this particular fanatic has never invested in touch typing, so the result would be about the same on any normal keyboard if his line of sight was obstructed.

[@EpseLepse]

I love the clock just ticking away your life in the background during the "typing" demo

[@matthew-ph6xo]

I’m surprised nobody’s made the appendix joke before

[@wkg19591]

There's a horrid science fiction movie called 'Battle beyond the stars' I think, in which our hero's spaceship looks a lot like this. If I recall correctly some comparison was made with Battle of the flying uterus....

[@Electrify85]

If 2020 could be summed up in a keyboard, this would be it.

[@pblair6591]

it looks like someone turned a stool upside down and stuck some keycaps on it

[@BertGrink]

I'd happily provide a stool sample to smear all over it 🤣

[@nanimuwu]

he be like instead of rotating my wrist or the keyboard, why not just rotate the fuck out of my head instead then i can get away from that pain

[@sEaNoYeAh]

I'm a big believer that form follows function, that if something is truly well designed then its appearance will naturally take on a certain kind of elegance, like a streamlined car or beautiful aerodynamic bird. This does not pass that test.

[@Deipnosophist_the_Gastronomer]

I ... guess ... it would be kinda 'safe' from liquid spills.

[@ameenq532]

This was... fucking awesome! XD Merry Christmas Thomas :)

[@1MadBurrito]

Is this guy a British version of AVGN that reviews keyboards? I love it!

[@daemonspudguy]

He's Dutch, but the rest is accurate.

[@jssmith0225]

Fun fact, this is the very first review of yours I ever saw. I came across it because this keyboard was featured in an episode of Parks and Recreation specifically because of how insane it was. Anyway, I was so entertained by these reviews that I now own multiple keyboards, especially of the vintage variety.

[@iLiokardo]

It's probably not even ergonomic at all. Because the keys are sideways, gravity is no help.

[@dorstefan]

Skip to 9:40 for a "torture" demonstration. The mirrors are there for when you do some activities and you don't want to get caught.

[@NortelGeek]

5:44 ... I'm actually crying from laughter.

[@marcchabotyt]

did you know that Unicomp will release a TENKEYLESS keyboard in March 2020? they are taking pre orders right now.

[@jan-russellyoung917]

I would be so tilted typing on this.

[@omysan]

Merry Christmas And A Happy New Year Thomas!

[@kelvinhon6861]

Champion swear per minute tech review of the year =D

[@carbonman8178]

If this is the standard keyboard layout for some alien race i would wounder what hellish means of locomotion they have.

[@BertGrink]

Me, pre viewing: Lol WUT?! 😜 Ho-Lee Crappe! That typing demo looked so painful to the soul that i'm convinced that if Thomas had access to a time machine, he'd travel back in time and exterminate at least three generations of forebears of the person who came up with this. On a different note, do you give swearing lessons, Thomas? I can't imagine a better teacher; I'd wager that you can out-Haddock Captain Haddock himself. Anyway... Happy Holidays to all!

[@voodoolilium]

it's like someone tried to design the absolute most nightmarish keyboard for Chyrosran22, and succeeded

[@missgradenkoMC]

"WANING"

[@Banom7a]

Indication that this gonna be a good video

[@Chyrosran22]

@@XavierFox42 It's a long-running in-joke ;) .

[@bibhuranjannath3418]

This or Smith Corona?

[@Surgeonftw]

atleast smith corona looks good on your shelf

[@logansorenssen]

That's bletcherous, but at least it's usable, which is more than I can say for this barfucious hunk of kaiju puke!

[@thelazywanderer_jt]

This swearing creativity skill is reacting ramsay levels, I'm impressed

[@hrabanus]

The clock ticking away Thomas's valuable time while typing is sensational

[@cherrycanary307]

I've never been so relaxed hearing someone call someone else a dingle berry, his voice is so lovely Edit: wow I really choose the most tame phrase in this video to pick out

[@13Omood]

I have been waiting for this video.

[@geewiz70]

I wouldn't be surprised if there were masochist community websites that require you to register with this keyboard.

[@TwentyNineJP]

I have exactly the sort of RSI this would be useful for, and found this video by searching for vertical keyboards specifically for that reason The mirrors are dumb but I wish I had this

[@mjrodrigo7637]

I do and it’s the best thing for rsi overuse carpal tunnel syndrome all of which I’ve had🎉 Well worth the investment I position the mirrors for the top row which is the furthest from my fingers. They’re not meant for the entire keyboard. Your fingers should know where most them are Oh and arm rests on the chair ur using will help save your shoulders❤

[@OlympusHeavyCavalry]

"... it looks like it's something I'd draw with my left hand ..." LMFAO. Cheers for the video and have a Merry Christmas Thomas :-)

[@JackOfHarts96]

That was my favourite quote too LOL

[@GenophefeElisabeth]

The mirrored letterkng on the number row and the function keys is kinda cool tho ...

[@LattE0825]

3:33 Yeah I agree that is pleasurable thank you very much

[@DrathVader]

My arm is getting tired by just looking at this thing. Whoever sent this must really hate you.

[@pappalink7734]

😂😁 Happy Christmas Chyros

[@chests6905]

hugging keyboard hugging keyboard

[@doverif]

chests hamburger cheezburger big mac whopper

[@neomaster341]

I'm down to one word a minute, and that word is "perflipisklup"

[@PancakeSparkle]

This keyboard is what you use when you want to set the world record for slowest typing speed and most pain endured while typing

[@Shkalim]

Finally, a true competitor to the TGR alice

[@Lazereed]

When you're expected to get a hollow block as a Christmas gift but you get this keyboard

[@olavolavson5302]

Thanks for a good laugh and happy holidays to you too!

[@FallNorth]

To be fair, if you had concerns that there were vampires lurking in your office environment, the permanent and justifyable mirrors would actually be quite handy as you observe people passing behind you. Also useful to help prevent sneak backstab attacks from ninjas.

[@gavin758]

Okay but now imagine this, but ortholinear, dvorak-layout, with chiclet keys

[@ElGuerreroMaya]

You are a mind of unsurpassed evil

[@TommyFenstermacher5150]

How about this with Smith Corona Leaf Spring switches?

[@jb_lofi]

That's not a good example because at least SOME people can tolerate Dvorak. How about Carpal X's torture layout? XD

[@giuseppeafellay4855]

I hope you step on legos

[@JackOfHarts96]

No. Dvorak is actually useful. How about an ABC layout?