SAO Abridged Parody: Episode 04

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This video is a non-profit fan-based parody. Sword Art Online is owned by A-1 Pictures, Aniplex USA, and Reki Kawahara. Please support the official release.
Opening Song: "This is War" by 30 Seconds to Mars
Cast (By order of appearance)
puccagarukiss: Rosalia
‪@puccagarukiss‬
Rachel Michelle: Silica
‪@0w0MikuruBEAM‬
Sonicring123Dubs: Party Member
‪@Sonicring123Dubs‬
KaggyVA: "Dream" Kirito, Goon 2, Additional Voices
‪@KaggyFilms‬
YamatoSFX: Kirito
‪@YamatoSFX‬
Anthony DiMascio/Dizzasta: Goon 1, Goon 3
/ 1637931727212646400
(PLEASE READ)
Daniel Hodge: Additional Voices
‪@dnhodge1156‬
SakiSeshy: Game Announcer
‪@sakiseshy‬
CREW
Editor/Artist: YamatoSFX
Writers: YamatoSFX, Hayabusa449, Jragoswinn
Music Used
SAO Soundtrack
Darksiders
Bravely Default
Batman: Arkham City
Amnesia: The Dark Descent
Valkyria Chronicles
Dragon Age 2
Dust: An Elysian Tale
LoZ: Ocarina of Time
Pokemon Red/Blue
A Something Witty Production

[@hay7199]

"Um... Boss, a thought occurs; This guy thought he was going up against Laughing Coffin but he still just brought himself and a small child, you sure we wanna mess with this guy?" He is literally the smartest person in this game.

[@pickhead7659]

Yeah....

[@catmancatman101]

Isaac Perez like how he said MIGHT(nice name btw)

[@Mr.President427]

hay7199 first three rows are a splaaaaaash zone "Maniacal laughter"

[@cephalothepod2192]

That first line is one of the best "Oh crap" lines I've ever heard/read.

[@evanbagnall3751]

No that one guy who was like "uh boss, I think this might be a trap" is the smartest guy out of them all in my opinion

[@travelingmerchant6434]

I love how she basically tells him that he is a completely heartless utter psychopath and he takes no offense whatsoever, but then she says he sounds like a girl and he loses it

[@Bite_me01]

It's the simple things that set people off more often then not take me for example you could call me every thing in the book and I will not care but if u just stare at me I get mad.

[@themaddoctor5304]

For some reason the smaller the insult the angrier it makes me. You could call me all sorts of profanities but it takes so much as a gentle bump and I just want to strangle someone to death.

[@Victor-056]

Kirito is well aware he's a Psychopath. It's claiming he sounds like a girl that ticks him off... Because his Sister uses that on him, and Kirito hates her.

[@Equinox1066]

@@Victor-056 I’m waiting for the abridged to get to Gun Gale Online - the planning ahead here is pure genius.

[@hellouniverse5451]

kirito is a Sociopath not a psychopath Asuna is the psychopath Bitch will murder you for looking at he man, truly a Couple made in Hell

[@thebrandunsafeone7184]

"I'm sorry. Its not your fault." "WHATS WRONG, LITTLE GIRL?!" Wow, the abridged series even did a better job at showing the trauma that incident left kirito.

[@Zappa_boi]

*Grenade Ring Being Pulled*

[@MurderDrone_enjoyer]

*Grenade Explosion*

[@thatguybrody4819]

the actual series: yeah i'm sad too how about we help each other the Abridged series: shows how the PTSD of the only real friend in the game he had dies in a way he couldn't control, even though he sees himself as the best person there, scars his mind and even though he said he killed the part that could still feel, her last words still punch deep.

[@thegooddoctor2009]

The fact that Pina speaks the same language as the dragons in Skyrim is a nod to the fact that SAO was published by Bethesda.

[@martindovah3810]

That explains the bugs.

[@THETRUEANONYMOUSONE845]

That explains a lot The great words of our Lord and Savior the spiffing Brit Todd Howard's work on Bethesda is amazing All his games just work

[@MonkeBrain07]

That explains way too much...

[@Naev0w0]

I know I'm five months late, but the language is called Dohvazulaan

[@remenant7372]

The foreshadowing with this one was truly amazing

[@cyberwolfmc9536]

What? Pina is evolving! Congratulations! Your Pina has evolved into a corpse!

[@ilikesaying]

CyberwolfMC no, Pina has evolved into a feather!

[@ShoutingDerek]

Maybe the feather as some like, crazy stats but she just didn't checked

[@RadarHawk]

CyberwolfMC The funny thing is that they play the lavender town music when pina is "evolving"

[@vanlex7910]

+Radar Hawk I knew that music was familiar!

[@theredandblackneogamer5160]

CyberwolfMC lol

[@thewatcher7094]

I love how abridged Kirito has the most fragile god complex and goes berserk when he’s insulted for how he sounds like a girl

[@attackontitanfollower]

In season 2 he’ll look like a girl

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

@@attackontitanfolloweryeah he may feel abused by pulls

[@ZijnShayatanica]

His ego knows no bounds, lmfao. Asuna's megalomania is way more secure than his.

[@yeetyeet3534]

“Theres one thing you didn’t account for…MY NUMBERS ARE BIGGER THEN YOURS” Sums up about literally everything in SAO

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

Yes and same goes for basically every other game and anime

[@Ikirus]

​@@carnivoreteacher8571there are ,at least some ,games where bigger numbers don't really matter

[@asherrudick3912]

@@IkirusLike Pokémon. People have destroyed the game using only level 1 Pokémon, like Rattata and Shedinja.

[@enigmatic3194]

Really makes me wish we could have some form of dialogue for more rpg or mmo games. Like imagine going up to that enemy camp you forgot early in the game and coming in all high-leveled to say a quote like that

[@twbillionare9568]

Baldur’s Gate 3 does that well

[@loganbrown7743]

That one guy who realized how strong kirirto was when he mentioned laughing coffin is probably the only person who plays mmorpg's

[@ramendude4062]

MF knows a boss by the dialogue.

[@logeyperogi1805]

Yeah One of the smartest thugs in fiction Up there with the thug who walked in on Batman breaking into his boss’ office, locked eyes with Batman, walked out and warned a fellow thug not to go in and investigate, then left

[@philippaul6039]

I didn't even read your comment. I just saw it had 699 likes so I made it 700. It could be really lame for all I know, and now I refuse to read it 😂

[@robertholtonjr.8530]

Read it. It's hilarious

[@okkoheinio5139]

​@@philippaul6039 idiot

[@baseballmadness6204]

“I’m getting real tired of your first year psych student bullsh*t.” God I love Abridged kirito’s voice actor, his voice is so cool to listen to 😂

[@Spartan135]

That voice and this character of abridged Kirito reminding me on Cartman. That childish crying of him is the most annoying of this parody

[@cunningsmile4166]

Reminds me of Izzy

[@jcohasset23]

The voice actor picked a really good voice for the personality. It fits perfectly.

[@butcanyoudothis3320]

His face and his voice together make for quite the vibe check if you've never seen it before

[@CptPhilippnes]

And now he's voicing Emiya Shirou in the Fate Stay Night Abridged lol

[@loonietuunes]

"Item has expired!" - Pina dies for real this time - "I'm sorry for your loss." - S c r e e c h -

[@noodlesnek]

and then proceeds to go on a mass murdering spree

[@justinpriebe6737]

@@noodlesnek .......she took that well.....

[@SesamUbe]

Imagine if she missed it by like a few seconds

[@nathanbezerra3597]

Legend has it that the Dragon's Widow still prowls the 47th floor to this day... If ye here her banshee-like scream, even if only faintly, maketh thee peace with thy god, for it thy time on earth has come to a somber and sudden end.

[@jotheunissen9274]

@@nathanbezerra3597 And when making peace with you god, remember: There's no reason to wonder where your god is because he's right here And he's fresh out of mercy

[@sparkred4565]

6:40 I hate how accurate kirito's description of getting an item in a rpg is

[@Dusk_Mightyena]

Me/A guy who had to go on a time consuming quest to get the Ultima Keyblade in Kingdom Hearts: It’s too true

[@logeyperogi1805]

Fucking Christ the Dawnguard storyline of Skyrim took forever, just adding more and more to the quests “Okay go get this bow!” “Okay, how?” “Well you’ll need to get the Elder Scrolls” “Sounds simple enough I suppose” “Then you’ll need to risk going blind and read one of them” “Uh…okay then, guess I can do that” “Then go to this completely random cave and meet this elf that’s the only known Falmer that hasn’t gone insane” “Alright then, I get the bow from him?” “Well after you complete his trials involving going through multiple areas infested with Falmer” “Then I get the bow?” “Nope, that’s when you have to go through an area infested with new variations of giants and dragons!” “Alright, THEN I get the bow?” “Well no, then you have to go through a ruin filled with powerful enemies” “I’m not even gonna ask because I know the answer is no” “Then you have to get the bow back from some guy who was apparently a traitor, but after that you get the bow” After getting the bow… “ALRIGHT, I HAVE THE BOW, NOW I CAN KILL HARKON” “Oh dude please, you could’ve killed that guy with a Skyforge Steel Sword if you wanted to” “…Are you serious right now? You just sent me against Vampires and Falmer…to get a bow…that I DON’T EVEN NEED?!” “Yep” “…this is going in a display case in my manor” “But if you aren’t gonna use it then why not give it to us?” “Because fuck you, that’s why”

[@willieearles3151]

@@logeyperogi1805 Good Lord, I love vampires but Dawnguard was so much of a pain in the ass. Dragonborn was the superior DLC by quite a bit.

[@montagegamerlive3604]

He didn't lied XD...it's kinda same in toram online too

[@logeyperogi1805]

@@willieearles3151 YES, god I love the Dragonborn DLC, that storyline was the shit, proving our superiority over Miraak was so satisfying

[@orlando780]

I like to think the reason kirito is so certain of there not being a way to kill someone in a safe zone, despite sao's supposed history of bugs and glitches, is because he has actively tried to kill someone in the safe zone before with no avail

[@theendersmirk5851]

Knowing him, that probably means the victim ended up becoming a part of a wall or the ground because he managed to noclip them into it, and he called that close enough. Said victim was likely clinically insane to an even greater degree than the average player after SAO ended.

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

@@theendersmirk5851yeahhahahahahaha hahahahaahaha a hahaha I’m dying as I’m reading that

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

Yep that about sums up kirito

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

@@theendersmirk5851that also may mean I could have maybe toootally rip their balls off

[@robertholtonjr.8530]

Don Fluffles

[@WillowTheLacera]

"I'ts so cute how Silica found someone on her level" "Hahaha, *what?*

[@backdraftxiii9640]

I lost it right there! I laughed for a good 5 minutes! 🤣🤣🤣

[@S-D-Listen]

Barret: Uh-oh

[@CaffineAdict2000]

He might of actually killed her in the safe zone

[@JmDGamez]

Just reading this comment made me laugh 😂

[@sasoridokueki5754]

…I think this kid got his training lessons from Lord Popo…… I mean, granted he has an eternity to master it but still…

[@oreoloki8872]

Kirito: what’s wrong little girl!?!!? Silica: well, I guess it all started when I was born Kirito: *internal screaming*

[@joshuamcpherson5859]

*gernade pin being pulled* *five second fuse light* *gernade explodes three seconds later*

[@trasyegriffieth]

@@joshuamcpherson5859 lmao

[@madi4087]

my mom was sort of a drinker

[@oreoloki8872]

Madison Dempsey *sighs in depressed*

[@seanpeacock4290]

and if she hadn't gone off on that little tangent she would have had enough time to save her pet.

[@ketsuekikumori9145]

Rosalia: Ah... your detection skill must be quite high. Asuna: I mean, he's trying to be Batman.

[@Jawsomest]

YOU'LL NEVER BE BATMAN. - Asuna shortly before being murdered.

[@handhelder823]

In that vein, i love how her lackeys are WAY better at hiding

[@logeyperogi1805]

Well that…and the fact that her username was sticking out from behind the tree

[@liquidsleepgames3661]

​@@logeyperogi1805please that was the fabled word tree of gamregora

[@elsonicvenezolano]

Kirito:Shut up Asuna! Asuna: Shut me up Silica: Shut up both! Asuna and kirito: Don't get silica!

[@nowayminer]

In case anyone was wondering when Pina says "Ful, Losei Dovahkiin" it translates to "So, you’re the Dragonborn?" Which is something Alduin says in skyrim.

[@rebekahsimmons8353]

I thought I heard "Dovahkiin" in that scene!

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

Thank you for translating I’m grad ful

[@TieflingKumasi]

“By the way, you didn’t hear anything weird last night, did you?” “Uuuhhh…” *Kirito bawling uncontrollably over Sachi*

[@frderberdeger6340]

I wonder wot would happen I’d kirito and Sachs happened

[@justsomeguy07]

Frderber Deger w h a t

[@Kakaragi]

This is canon in my eyes!

[@braydentobin5150]

Frderber Deger stronk

[@thelegendaryarrox5559]

Frderber Deger r/stroke

[@breakcore981]

“My mom was a bit of a drinker, and 9 months sober just wasn’t in the cards” that was the best quote

[@polarknight5376]

Oh no.

[@garden3818]

Lmao

[@alexmeza9080]

2:55

[@Unproductivenonsense]

"Whats wrong little girl?" Is right behind it

[@brock7074]

relatable now I'm socially awkward but make almost double what my coworkers make cause I can't sit still. ADD Hits Heavy 🤪 tho my womb donar was a binge drinker with a pint addiction

[@jokeofalltrades2838]

The fact that Kirito's voice actor uses his real voice when playing Kirito makes the "you sound like a girl" scene a hundred times funnier.

[@ExActa]

Can we appreciate the fact Kirito seemed to have actually listened and remembered Silicas story

[@pikapuffin368]

He doesn’t care, but he REALLY cares quite a bit

[@histhoryk2648]

No surprise there, he knows entire lore of the rock

[@meapyboy12345]

@@histhoryk2648 Hey it’s a *pebble* not a rock. Get your lore straight man

[@Myst____]

⁠​⁠@@meapyboy12345hey, it’s a mithril pebble, not just any pebble. Get your lore straight man

[@4lackofbetter]

@@Myst____ The Mithril Pebble of Pig Smiting. Forged in the fiery pits of Tartarus, by the grand blacksmith of Lucifer himself. Get your lore straight man.

[@kingrocky7519]

Silica: "This isn't your fault..." *triggered Sachi PTSD flashbacks* Kirito: "W H A T ' S W R O N G L I T T L E G I R L ! ? ! ?"

[@heyitsmeskylar6564]

"well you see, it all started the day i was born, and neither of my parents showed up"

[@altadeam]

I laugh and cry at same time

[@RandomPerson-cm2wg]

​@@heyitsmeskylar6564 I just realized that your reply was one of the backstory of doofenshmirtz.

[@Boobee5467]

Padlov theory when an experience is attached to a certain word that when said word is said it triggers a response like say trying to be nice like sachi wanted him to be

[@master-of-many-fandoms2020]

Ugh, the way they handle the Sachi trauma is just gut wrenching. Thanks whoever came up with this for making me feel that

[@josephercanbrack8393]

"That's insane! Who'd design a game this way?!" "......You don't play many RPGs, do you?"

[@cunningsmile4166]

Honestly Tycoon games are less complicated

[@bman296]

4 years late but yeah he just summed up RPGs in a nutshell....

[@hellmasterjoleck]

still less complicated then the moonstone quest from ultima 7

[@kobiimac5131]

The crimson nirnroot in the Stones of Barenziah from Skyrim are very notorious for being absolutely retarded and when they remastered or was one of its DLCs on the original release they took away the ability to use the Clairvoyance spell to guide you to the Crimson Nirnroot I already and waste of your time Quest even more hell

[@shiftfire4511]

..Can...Can I just say that Silica somehow managed to claw the FUCK out of Kirito's face, and is apparently going on a complete rampage across the entire floor, burning the city to the ground. Kirito is level 78, where a bunch of mooks in the 40s couldn't even overwhelm his passive regen...and her marks are still there. And she's destroying the town..I.E, A FUCKING SAFE ZONE. She's probably got a kill count bigger than the entirety of Laughing Coffin at this point.

[@jacksonscott3667]

Late response, but that boss rush for the insane fetch quest probably powerleveled her to the point that the average player wouldn’t stand a damn chance.

[@PromethiaSHADOW]

Small child on a pure rage tantrum is one of the most destructive forces of nature in a game or real life EVER! Speaking from experience as a father and gamer! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@firewolf950tfwgaming7]

Realizations like this make me sad that Silica never got any more moments in the main show because that means there’s basically nothing left for SWE to abridge and expand upon this smol child of sheer terror and destruction.

[@elsonicvenezolano]

I already imagine her in jail and the other prisoners like "How is a 12 year old girl in jail?" And that in Alfheim he is now on parole and thus he will meet Kirito again xd

[@Iron8127]

Note to self, keep your distance from Silica.

[@sheysheybear8167]

"You see, there's no need to wonder where your god is! 'Cause he's right here, *and he's fresh out of mercy* " FUCKING. GOLDEN.

[@reeselawson3686]

Best. Line. Ever

[@theeyeoftheyinyangs]

You like that line? It’s yours.

[@josiahharrison5096]

I started dying after hearing that quote

[@a5_muffin807]

My favorite

[@ThePoTaTo101]

true

[@TheStrongestBaka]

"Enjoy this while you can, it's the deepest you'll ever be in a woman". 10/10

[@janatownsend-gee3409]

Then in episode 9 "SUCK IT ROSALIA"

[@starlitgalaxies5808]

"WHO''S ROSALIA???"

[@matthewbrune5490]

+RagnaFan555 I MEANT IN COMBAT

[@thesohai9061]

Oh! I get it now! thats why he said "SUCK IT ROSSALIA!!!", not hoping she would suck her.

[@MrMinecraftBlader]

Wishes not to die a virgin, granted eternal life.

[@Xinoz2]

Oh my god, I just realised that the "You sound like a girl." that Rosalia threw out was them setting up for feminine avatar Kirito in GGO.

[@thegreat4]

He's probably going to try to play as a girl

[@MrTigracho]

@Andy KnightWarden ¿Quien se mete con mi Trapito?

[@randompromises1038]

if/when they get to ggo i _reeeeally_ hope they reference rosalia.

[@kurai913]

Random Promises At some point they will

[@deadlydealer8324]

Eh I have doubts they'll get pass season 2

[@jinx17]

Seeing rosalias name tag behind the tree when shes hiding is something I think about quite a lot when playing mmos I fucking love it 😂

[@unkeyboardonated350]

I never fucking noticed that holy.😂

[@jaycubauch3927]

The end implies that Silica could damage Korito by the end, and I love that. She left actual marks on his face, Titan's Hamd couldn't leave a scratch.

[@AquaLantern]

Killing all those bosses with him must've made her numbers skyrocket lol

[@notme3603]

@@AquaLantern i like to think she went so psycho mode that she hit him faster than he could heal

[@Ichiyama22]

Maybe she unlocked the unique skill "Go Apeshit"

[@Cdre_Satori]

Well they did leave a scratch but her damage seemed to have lingered longer than thugs slashing attacks. So maybe, but I think the SAO just has that annoying you are littered with red marks but only lost 5% HP model that rewards lots of slashing.

[@HectorT52]

How did I not get that is was her going crazy until now?

[@xenorayy]

Silica thinking Pina is going to evolve while the Lavender Town theme plays in the background, this show is hilarious yet brilliant down to the details

[@darkgachamaker573]

Each time I say that scene I say "learn your pokemon music"

[@chimeraofscarlet8610]

@@sirdabsalot1yt83 nono, he was talking to silica

[@manaphy0993]

@God Of Destruction Jay Drain Doo da Dee da doo da Dee da

[@dr.bright6272]

And the Legend of Zelda music in the town

[@bigpoggers6507]

@@manaphy0993 DOOO DOOO DOOO DOOO, DO DO DO DO DOOOOOO DO

[@amethystziggurat9946]

"There's no need to wonder where your god is, because he's right here...... And he's fresh out of mercy...."

[@bladegtr34]

* whimpers uncontrollably *

[@mayumayuyosh]

*a thug cries*

[@cunningsmile4166]

That's so badass

[@rileybullock6164]

SAOA is better than the original. Prove me wrong

[@luxrion5179]

@@rileybullock6164 By the wise words of a random asshole - "I think this is a trap."

[@lucasconner2993]

as tradition dictates, we must rewatch this all at least once a year.

[@mrswaninator3540]

5 take it or leave it!

[@hozkahilgarri3936]

Merry Chrimmas

[@atemnirnasha]

At least for every new episode

[@kyuseikawakami2611]

....once a week. Huh? Oh yeh I year

[@allister6092]

Mhm. Definitely not like.. Every week. Year. Yes.

[@CruiserToneFan]

"A quantum supercomputer calculating for a thousand years, could not even APPROACH the number of fucks I do not give" that just made me die laughing

[@Midnight-zq5op]

"This guy thought he was going up against Laughing Coffin but he only brought himself and a small child. You sure we want to mess with this guy?" This one guy who made a brief appearance in this Abridged Parody is smarter than everyone from the original series combined.

[@dovahkiingames7617]

Definitely smarter than 99.9% of the abridged series characters

[@Kenpachi-eo6vz]

Lmao so fking true

[@alexanderwidmar2850]

2 true

[@tyler89557]

Still dumber than Kirito.

[@exumbra1399]

Does no one bother checking enemy levels?!

[@Jackhammer892]

Random Goon: Boss, I think this might be a trap Smartest man in the game right there

[@robertmitchell9559]

Yeah

[@dreaddemon3347]

*proceeds to attack anyways*

[@Alpha.Phenix]

I would like your comment, but it's currently at 666.

[@TheMartinsAL]

I always ruin people’s 666 likes and make 667 because I am a jack ass

[@snwmn4783]

Tiffany Martin imma be the jack ass jack ass and dislike you!

[@PhotonDragon16]

Kayaba clearly turned off the immortal objects just for Silca's breakdown. probably popped out some popcorn to

[@TheAnimeEncyclopedia]

Also for Lisbethd shop with Asuna

[@theeyeoftheyinyangs]

Ever realize this game has serious destructive players in it? Kinda best they stay in there before they spread that chaos in real life

[@theunwiserleaf957]

The best part Is the fact that Kirito canonically wears a dragon leather coat

[@johngervais230]

"But be careful, the first few rows are a splash zone!" "Um...what does that mean?" *maniacal laughter*

[@Somethingintelligent]

That whole part described me in fallout 3 I was unbiased in my universal slaughter

[@Cinkodacs]

Well, it went better for him than for those Sabbat thugs who jump you in VTMB.

[@agentpb8260]

Seversl war crimes were committed that day.

[@darkgachamaker573]

666 likes

[@DarthVader-6637]

I respect his act

[@MrOniro1]

Just realized that even if the damage he takes is minimal there is no pain absorber in the abridged version so he's taking all those hits without flinching.

[@shadowbladeandlightin8889]

You're right, even if it makes the slashes feel like nothing worse than paper cuts they still hurt like heck

[@Linosek279]

There is no better pain reliever than pure, smoldering, blistering fury

[@orthusgames9888]

@@Linosek279 you are very correct

[@whoknows7968]

@@Linosek279 Want some aloe for that fury? It sounds like it's gonna leave a burn.

[@AsapdewMeow]

There is no pain absorber in the original either

[@Alchemist9572]

9:30 “Boss this guy thought he was going against Laughing Coffen but he still just brought himself and a small child, you sure we wanna mess with this guy?” 💀💀

[@darth-severus]

🤣 I love that line so much

[@crackheadventi3518]

Kirito has had so much bullshit in S-A-O

[@PromethiaSHADOW]

That was the smartest guy in Titans Hand 👌😂😂

[@marcovchb]

Only SAO has the potential to be memefied to this extent.

[@josephreagan9545]

DBZ Abridged by team fourstar was also pretty good.

[@seankelly3540]

@@josephreagan9545 Hellsing Ultimate as well

[@dansoloskywalkerproduction4329]

SAO kirito: a guy with two swords and 6 girls Abridged kirito: a crazy depressed guy turning to the dark side and killing people

[@tylernelson310]

I still like the abriged one better

[@souperhappydrinkingcoffee5130]

Yet the abridged kirito still has more personality

[@jotheunissen9274]

That description sounds like Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader

[@jadecamirand550]

@@jotheunissen9274 as a Star Wars fan myself, I agree

[@knownjj555]

sounds like Anakin to me

[@Copynin13]

"It's so nice to see Silica found someone on her level" *Kirito has been triggered*

[@sasoridokueki5754]

(Snickers) …WhAt…?

[@Jumpybug129]

She has chosen death

[@Shannessa]

Jesus-kun became Satan-kun

[@nickparkyn3561]

The pupil shrink was hilarious

[@somerandomguy844]

*Angry higher-level-than-your-entire-guild-combined l33t noises*

[@thatpunygirl___149yes8]

This episode in the Normal series: I really dislike this episode it’s sooo plain and bad This episode in the abridged: I LOVE THIS EPISODE IT HAS SOME OF THE FUNNIEST LINES

[@TheAnimeEncyclopedia]

This abridged episode also has very important lore about how Kirito got Duel Wielding XD

[@igorpachmelniekzakuskov776]

And Kirito is also finally forced to be confronted with somebody who can 1. See right through his act & 2. Is calling him out on it. In fact, while the battle itself may have not left any physical scars on him, the psychological scars that Rosalia left on him were actually quite brutal.

[@zinkheroofyoutube8004]

@@igorpachmelniekzakuskov776We know how bad it was because he literally screams her name during a... uh... certain scene

[@ahooman3970]

On the brightside, Silica must've leveled up *A TON* from that boss rush

[@GoatsBaa-dk7nw]

I wonder if this was how she was able to damage him at the end of the episode

[@Zeuts85]

"A quantum super computer, calculating for a thousand years, could not even _approach_ the number of fucks I do not give." LMFAO.

[@Shotzy64]

+Matthew Doan That's probably the few things I like about the Abridged series over the original. Kirito thinks of the best lines xD (Especially in Episode 8 before fighting Kuradeel..)

[@Uchihabloodunlimited]

+Kayla Murphy Stop laughing in french you mouthbreathing neckbeard!

[@laurakate5167]

Haha that's so LAMAU

[@aceofsalts0246]

+Shotzy you know what's funny? sao abridged is better than the original

[@phillthepotato4363]

+Matthew Doan What so funny about it? It's not uncommon.

[@ZainyCaelum]

Emotionally Traumatized Kirito: WHAT'S WRONG, LITTLE GIRL?

[@ZainyCaelum]

"Come on Silica. We've got a hamster to save." -Triggered Kirito

[@frog6992]

Lightning Aura Pissed off kirito:There's no need to wonder where your got is. Cuz he's right here...and he's fresh out mercy

[@megsrants8592]

.....don't want to intrude...I'll just find myself a spot that isn't full of crying Children.... oh look there's one now Aren't you going to ask me what's wrong? Yeah I'm not not pulling the pin on that grenade Your right I'm sorry this isn't your fault your fault your fault YOUR FAULT.... And cue your comment lol

[@coreonline7431]

Megan Kueteman WhAT iS WroNg LiTtLe GiRL?!

[@megsrants8592]

Core Online LOL

[@magicalmelancholy970]

The longer I stay online the better this series gets (they even got the "12 year old dumping all of their trauma on people they just met" thing right)

[@Neutral_Tired]

There's no pain limiter in this game. He may be immortal but Kirito felt every one of those hits

[@seankelly3540]

Oh gosh, I didn't even think of that. He didn't even flinch. Thank you for this horror to imagine, that's badass

[@mansonchan6257]

the fact that kirito is 14 really cements the fact that this kirito's emo/edgy level got cranked up to 11.

[@tobyharrison4702]

I mean by the point of this episode isn’t it like 2 years later so isn’t Kirito 16?

[@ferretrevelvent6793]

@@tobyharrison4702 Yeah he is 16 by this ep

[@simulatednonsense9954]

Pretty average 14 year old ngl

[@hartjedi2]

Dude stick a 14 year old in a video game for 2 years straight and see how much they actually mature

[@beanos8024]

@@hartjedi2 true... to be fair I'm pretty sure the majority of people would come out totally different when you stick them in that hellscape for two years.

[@vicentetemes5793]

This Kirito is better characterized than actual SAO Kirito.

[@vicentetemes5793]

Also, after rewatching this series, I just realized that those guys could have used a paralysis poison, use Kirito's hand to force him into a trade, and then drop him off a cliff. Man, would this game be easy.

[@mrfafaa96]

Logic was never a feature in SAO. Maybe you have to buy a dlc first or something.

[@vicentetemes5793]

Mr Fafaa Meh. Anyways, some guys are building semi-working Nervegears right now, and if I ever meet a Kirito, I will drop him like a fucking bass.

[@kirito-ty5ky]

meh

[@cecemetro]

You are my BEST friend! XD

[@kwow3233]

Kirito: just stay calm, you already have everything you need to beat it Silica: the power to believe in myself? Kirito: NO! A KNIFE! STAB IT!

[@ryuoshinz]

'There's no need to wonder where your god is' Cause he's right here and...... *HE'S FRESH OUTTA MERCY* Best line kirito ever said

[@GoatsBaa-dk7nw]

Either that or "Because contract killing is a beat we can all dance to" :D

[@aeryn9361]

SAO: Kirito, the generic protagonist Abridged: Kirito, the last thing you’ll ever see

[@neal2399]

Kirito: the Doomslayer

[@aname6104]

Aeryn abridged Kirito: a psychopath

[@misaka3468]

@@aname6104 he is a sociopath if I am not mistaken

[@gladmad1336]

SAO: Kirito, your generic overpowered protagonist Abridged: “That is the most scariest fucking thing I have seen in my entire fucking life.” -Nick, L4D2

[@watcherofmemelords7967]

Be fair it's actually kirito Ardyn lucious canum.

[@loading294]

This series gave kirito an actual personality

[@Soulxstar]

This replace the Foam cup personality for some kind of spicy tuna roll which I fucking love

[@hajmgenial]

Yeah, now is a Douchebag Basically, now is Naofumi

[@JaidenTheBest]

@@hajmgenial I never thought about it that way but last episode was basically like bitch's betrayal

[@beastunleashed657]

@@hajmgenial lol Abridged Kirito is more like prime LeafyIsHere. Naofumi is pretty cool and justified, this Kirito, isn't.

[@beastunleashed657]

@@hajmgenial also, don't you dare compare this whiny piece of shit to my boi Naofumi.

[@wadethompson4631]

“Boss I think this might be a trap.” Delivery is so perfect, gets me every time,

[@TheAnimeEncyclopedia]

I came back to rewatch SAOA, And just realised, *THEY EVEN FORESHADOWED THE WORD TREE!* 7:10

[@allisonekgasit9291]

... oh my god, you right.

[@samreid6010]

I think you mean the math tree

[@rogerogue7226]

@@samreid6010 Por qué no los dos?

[@Th3_Ozi]

"Kid no language on earth has a word for how little I care, A quantum super computer calculating thousands of years can't approach the number of FKS I DO NOT GIVE... Best lines ever🤣🤣

[@yuriocafe9591]

"The friggin heat death of the UNIVERSE COULD NOT--"

[@PixieNekoChan]

“ Are you gonna help me or not?”

[@chimkim]

"I thought I made myself clear about my number of fucks and willingness to give them."

[@ravingtac0896]

I can’t not laugh at this line it’s so good

[@jessicabarnett3966]

This line has been very useful in my day to day life

[@numbers93]

Rosalia must have been rolling over her grave when abridged episode 9 came around...

[@tommylawseern1916]

SUCK IT ROSALIA!! I love you too.... Wait WHO THE FUCK IS ROSALIA!!!!

[@roybane4788]

LOL

[@zero10135able]

+Chiriac Puiu the sword went about an inch in im pretty sure kiritos got more than that

[@zero10135able]

Chiriac Puiu this chapter would say otherwise www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwiW57H73ozOAhUn4YMKHU6SAn0QFggxMAc&url=https%3A%2F%2Fdocs.google.com%2Ffile%2Fd%2F0BwyW7ZpWYsQBaThmR0Foa2ZfOG8%2Fedit&usg=AFQjCNH3DNmJf7trZA5tEx0OazSpzlta7g&sig2=Bk4vLWGFx1zksxuZhvZXHg

[@thesixbitkid9446]

+Chan Master Jesus Christ that is just to much I mean good god that was weird reading that all the images in my head

[@mirandathomassen6339]

Watching this knowing the kind of bullying his sister put him through, I understand even more now why he reacts the way he does here. The character writing in the abridged is fantastic.

[@Dragonheart2549]

"Feelings? I don't have those anymore. Went cold-turkey" Some days I feel the same way..

[@skykrasher4475]

Rosalia: “This...is the deepest...you’ll ever...be in a woman.” *dies* I think Asuna would care to disagree.

[@GhostBear3067]

Which is why during that event Kirito shouts "SUCK IT ROSALIA!!!" Asuna takes exception to him shouting another woman's name at that moment...

[@sgtRedFireFox]

You really went there nice brother nice

[@gladmad1336]

“Well you’re dead so.... *_FUCK_* !”

[@shadowyblackness]

That's what she said🥁😁

[@ahaloplayer3950]

Let me improve your sentence I think asuna would beg to differ

[@colorblindartist5238]

Watching this for the fifth time and I JUST noticed Rosalia's name sticking out from behind the tree. The amount of detail in this is insane.

[@ontariolongboarding]

same dude

[@Devin-oh7gr]

Its the Fabled Whir Tree of Gomagorath show it some damn respect

[@MyPisceanNature]

HA! Only 5? I am on 15! :p lol

[@bman296]

Nani?

[@xVx_Krt_xVx_KillMe]

“Wait Silica, do mine eyes deceive me, tis the fabled whir tree of gomagorath, faunt of human knowledge and devourer of souls. Quickly child, we must spirit away before oh my god will you just come out already”

[@triedtherest]

"There's no need to wonder where your God is. He's right here..." *whispers* "...and he's fresh out of mercy!" I am absolutely stealing this line for my next D&D character!

[@darkgachamaker573]

Are they a warlock or paladin/cleric? Or maybe some other class that dosnt really have to do with God's and demons power?

[@bluntblade6887]

Kirito: “What’s the point of living if I can’t enjoy the simple things (revenge)?” -next episode preceded to get revenge on NPC that abandoned party Ah, the little details and continuity of this series are great.

[@drakeyork241]

Didn’t abandon the party, just triggered the trap that killed the party

[@jamesbrown6994]

​@@drakeyork241 then he proceeded to teleport out of there

[@paulmeans1056]

*THESE BRAIN CELLS COULD'VE BEEN USED TO FORMULATE THE PERFECT STRATEGY TO GET OUT OF THIS GAME.* *BUT INSTEAD THEY'RE BEING USED TO MEMORIZE WHAT CRAYONS YOU LIKED TO EAT WHEN YOU WERE FOUR.* "i really liked the purple ones.."

[@mewz20]

Paul Does Vlogging yeah i know and the blue ones where to tart

[@wizzdom712]

Mew Tube too*

[@epicnerd7499]

The school system in a nutshell

[@davidmaclaury904]

Paul Does Vlogging because the blue ones were too tart

[@kimoinito2967]

In the old Captions after Kirito said "Yeah I know, and the blue ones were too tart!" It said (I preferred the green ones)

[@WakkaMadeInYevon]

holy shit Sachi's death actually had an effect on Kirito *wow*

[@zerayah2474]

Wakka: Made in Yevon Lol, Kirito: Oo Sachi Sachi Sachi ohh sachi SACHI

[@pocholodeguzman6703]

Wakka: Made in Yevon I I

[@alyiasproductions1283]

Wakka: Made in Yevon 😂 KIRITO HAS FEELINGS!!!

[@ngkhaiping]

Continuity.

[@zion_nx]

WHATS WRONG LITTLE GIRL?!

[@odbdice9583]

Kirito went from an empty shell of a character to a empty shell of a man

[@randomloser5271]

We're getting closer to the year that sao is released in real life.

[@falxblade1352]

Omg wait it released this year didn't it?

[@monkeyolympics8993]

WHERES MY NERVE GEAR!!

[@dandanthedandan7558]

Reality is often dissapointing

[@kol2804]

"You don't need to look for your god.... Cause he's right here.... and he's fresh out of mercy"

[@chanela.7786]

guy starts crying😂

[@bellarancois4580]

best sentence ever

[@PussInBoots3]

+Chocolate bunny I wish Beerus said that when Buu ate all the pudding

[@spoonyluv19]

so using that line in pvp matches

[@Xciteable]

greatest line ever

[@canadiangopnik7007]

“Umm, boss, A thought occurs, this guy thought he was going up against laughing coffin, but he still just brought himself, and a small child, you sure we wanna mess with this guy?” Smartest bad guy ever

[@silvervase]

Boss I think this might be a trap. (Second smartest badguy)

[@andrewdiaz3529]

@@silvervase gangster walks into dark room, see Batman in the corner, walks right on out, his boss walks past him in the hallway headed for that very room and asks what's wrong. The guy just says nothing. 3rd smartest goon right there

[@Lowkeylie]

@@andrewdiaz3529 Nah, he’s the first smartest. The other two idiots still attacked Kirito.

[@magiclapras]

@@Lowkeylie Yep.

[@hihowareyou2013]

It’s not laughing coffin it’s just a small fry murdering guild named titans hand

[@edwardberryman2322]

I love how Silica learns that she has everything she needs to get the thing she wants, by learning that complaining about something that has nothing to with the situation at hand, and not taking care of it, to killing the enemies

[@edwardberryman2322]

What

[@anonymanonymus4706]

"The boy thought he was going against the laughing coffins but still came alone with a child" and "my numbers are bigger than yours" are probably the most epic flexes in anime history.

[@tqkf8878]

“No need to wonder where you god is, cause he’s right here.” *whispers* “and he’s fresh out of mercy”

[@bendragneel5337]

Would you fight abridge Kirito inside of Sao the game. My answer is fuck no I don't want to die

[@amvsofthegods2423]

@@bendragneel5337 them: abridged or regular? Me: no.

[@galethestardustangel4477]

One of the best lines in the series

[@HaruTheWolf]

Me in every video game

[@mrswaninator3540]

One of my favorite lines.

[@theashman4290]

“This is the deepest you’ll ever be in a woman” 6 episodes later (I think)....

[@fatboy7609]

"SUCK IT ROSALIA!"

[@itsjustluxas7663]

Its very dirty

[@satan4942]

Imagine he did all that to prove rosalia wrong tho

[@liamfalvey5142]

5

[@jdvictor1921]

Better six inches deep than six feet under, I guess?

[@johnmcauliffe8824]

"there is no more reason to wonder where your God is... cause he is right here, and he is fresh out of mercy" one of my favorite lines from this series

[@Abominatrix650]

Fucking hell, this is some god-tier voice acting. Also this episode is as brilliant as I remember it! So nice to come back to it after all these years! Silica's "Wait, wut?" is something that plays in my head whenever I get surprised by something the way she did in this episode! This is an immortal gemstone of KZbin and deserves to be in humanity's Hall Of Fame when we go extinct!

[@nataliegood8854]

flashbacks of Sachi's death "WHATS WRONG LITTLE GIRL!"

[@insanitysreign6195]

"Nope, not pulling the pin on that grenade."

[@shingshongshamalama]

"?wHAt's WrONg LitTLe gIRL¿"

[@TheAsvarduilProject]

*Tink* *BOOM!*

[@franzsanders9573]

The voice actor’s ridiculously hoarse delivery of that line is what really sells that scene, imho.

[@sgtRedFireFox]

@@insanitysreign6195 right as i read this he said it

[@bobkile9734]

Rosalia: You’re all level 45, and there’s SEVEN of you! I think you got this Kirito: *evil smile*

[@darkgachamaker573]

@Æ they make a reference to him during alfheim as well

[@1krauterquark88]

@Æ i am pretty sure its the same smile like shiroe from Log Horizon( only without glases)

[@blackcatsmusicroom2553]

@@1krauterquark88 it is i checked

[@Klaaism]

The smile with the glasses is better imho

[@fangwolf2511]

kirito: shows 0 care traumatic event resurfaces kirito: whAtS tHe ProBleM lItTle GuRl

[@tylerhunt2342]

10:46 My wounds heal faster then you can make them!

[@Psusanoo]

Something Witty Entertainment: Please support the official release. Me: How can I support the original when the Abridged version is a true improvement?

[@whoknows7968]

SWE: _Just do it, the official release benefitting from this series is all that keeps the feds off our backs._

[@UGNAvalon]

Well, the more “official” content there is, the more SWE can bless it with their improvements ? ;D

[@Chrisadeth]

Though this masterpiece wouldn't exist without the train wreck that is otherwise known as SAO proper

[@ApocryphalDude]

Watch on Netflix counts

[@xen9221]

@@Chrisadeth The aincrad arc is amazing but after that it just slowly goes downhill until ggo where it slams into rock bottom.

[@captainjoji827]

Rosalia: This is the deepest you ever be in a women, Asuna: Hold my kitchen knife*

[@der_pinguin44]

Woman*

[@person4029]

*procceds to stab rosalia with said kitchen knife*

[@spartan1839]

Those r some awesome final words

[@NocturnalPyro]

Some Guy with a Beard that sounds like abridged Asuna

[@jenstoddard6179]

Oh yes rosalia... suck it!

[@veiledrecalcitrance4314]

It’s funny when you pr watching this thinking “yeah Kirito, get ‘em”, and then you realize that he just really killed like 6 people, and Rosalia’s final words lose the barb when you know that she’s dead dead irl

[@eldenlion5850]

I like Kiritos' way of dealing with 1st year psych student BS. Talking to them is such a chore. Literally, anything you say or do is rooted in deep-seated trauma you never had.

[@GoldenKirby]

Ah yes, murder. Why don't we all just do that in response

[@ICantThinkOfAFunnyHandle]

​@@GoldenKirby murder is based

[@GoldenKirby]

@eldenlion5850 bro, chill out it ain't that serious lmao Talk about being unable to take a joke. You talk like you hate these 1st year psych student bs and then pop off in a small comment I made You were supposed to destroy the sith, not become it!

[@eldenlion5850]

@@GoldenKirby Welp, I'm gonna have to hold this L. I apologize for questioning your intelligence. I've dealt with so many people who can't tell the difference between reality and cartoon instinct just kinda kicked in. I'm gonna walk that one back my back fail on my part.

[@notstormabridged4971]

YOU SEE, THERE'S NO REASON TO WONDER WHERE YOUR GOD IS, BECAUSE HE'S RIGHT HERE. And he's fresh out of mercy Five years and I still, use this quote

[@JordanDragonAs]

Guy in the background "uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhh."

[@jadendrabik5708]

Same

[@CEO_Of_Arson_68]

Did he ever *have* any mercy?

[@UhgeneIgnorian]

And who do you use it on exactly?

[@highesthighlander7377]

How and when do you use it??

[@al-xks]

“You sound like a girl” Several years later we learn about his abusive sister suguha “The patient displays classic narcissistic and borderline sociopathic behavior, especially when engaging with her brother, kazuto kirigaya, this appears to stem from deeply held feelings of resentment as well as internalized self-hatred regarding own femininity”

[@gaybirthday9326]

Damn, I completely forgot about that.

[@thatguy1806]

Wait wHaT

[@gamv5850]

Own feminity? So Suguha knowss Kirito looks and sounds pretty "feminine" (genderbender Kirito in GGO)? Thats why she bullies him and has problems of self steem?

[@thatguy1806]

I don't remember suguha bullying him, when did this happen?

[@jordanu6501]

I tried reading it but i could never figure out what it says.

[@Manamius]

It's occurred to me that in the original show, Kirito shows up just in time to save Silica but not Pina, but also said he was using her as bait, so in the original he intentionally let Pina die.

[@tomasespitia3427]

This Kirito is a badass, but also completly terrifing i love it xd, I dont know why but in one form or another i always remember and come back to see this abridged series again every couple months, itgets better each time

[@sakiinui9643]

9:28 "Um... Boss a thought occurs, this guy thought he was going up against Laughing Coffin but he still just brought himself and a small child" **Kirito's just laughing maniacally in the background**

[@why-cp7dx]

Saki Inui lol

[@adenisbored2498]

That one person has more intelligence then everyone in the official sao COMBINED

[@kazutokirigaya5262]

* "laughs maniacally in the background" *

[@welcometopornhubbaby6632]

That laugh I the last thing you'll ever hear.

[@SesamUbe]

The smartest prop in the show 😂😂

[@kurokaen2854]

Whoever does Silica's voice is legendary. It sounds like the actual dub voice actor.

[@cunningsmile4166]

Might just be

[@blyarin5825]

Kuro Kaen I like her voice too, her crying near the beginning sounded like a sheep for some reason

[@lelouchvibritannia7702]

Just wait until you hear kiritos va

[@yowatchie]

Wow just looked her up she started getting legit roles a few years after this episode.

[@carnivoreteacher8571]

Wow

[@Roy-K]

No dialogue will ever go harder than “there’s no need to wonder where your god is, because he’s right here; and he’s fresh out of mercy”

[@TheDakotaCruiser]

“Aww that’s adorable, you think they’re a threat!” I can’t count how many times I’ve uttered that line playing other games online lol

[@schrodingerscatinthehat]

"There's no need to wonder where your god is, cuz he's right here... ... and he's fresh out of mercy" 😂😂😂😂😂

[@princessthyemis]

One of the best lines in the entire show!!

[@aaa_900]

*one lackey cries*

[@mirror972]

Kirito snapped lmao

[@CorbCorbin]

Almost as good as "winners don't do drugs, except steroids."

[@ShonowtH]

No, this is definitely the best line in the series. Also, they have a shirt for it! :D

[@jeremiahdude326]

"Kirito ! Don't look up my skirt !" "uhh...I think you have more pressing concerns." I died xD

[@wenwen9358]

Kirito clone again? Owww man

[@jeremiahdude326]

Kirigaya Kazuto Clone ? Nah , more like distant brothers. ;D

[@jeremiahdude326]

***** We don't speak of that.

[@jeremiahdude326]

***** SHHHH.

[@cloudfanlp4923]

Dr CannonFodder he is in neither of that XD

[@Shdbskskcbsn]

This kirito has more of a personality then cannon kirito

[@kmh0237]

I know everyone is too busy quoting the episode, but can we all appreciate the fact that one of the greatest songs in the world got a cameo at 11:33 ? This guy has such good taste.

[@NocturnalPyro]

Despite Silica only appearing in this one episode of the abridged series she has more character than in all of her screentime throughout all the season of the original.

[@benjamindotore3657]

Tbf, "all the screentime of the season" is actually just this one episode.

[@NocturnalPyro]

Benjamin Dotore yeah true

[@nightshade2826]

@@benjamindotore3657 I didnt get more personality from her in the other seasons so maybe its still fair.

[@magiclapras]

@@benjamindotore3657 Yeah, iirc she didn't appear again until after Fairy Dance.

[@Webbyneon89]

When Kirito went full on savage take no prisoners mode and spoke the line. "You see there's no need to wonder where your God is...cause he's right here...and he's fresh out of mercy...." That had me in absolute fucking tears.XD

[@gokubroly12009]

Webbyneon89 just be careful. The first 3 rows are a splaaash zone

[@TheGreatBananaMan888]

Webbyneon89 I

[@tylerstoltman8985]

Webbyneon89 lol same

[@jasonfalzarano7888]

Eh.heh he hehhhhhh.......😭😰

[@boringaverage2962]

Webbyneon89 ,me to

[@Shadowxx98]

The bridge scene must be one of my favourites of yours. The maniacal laugh, the two actual smart guys, the eye twiching, "... there is no need to wonder where your god is... because he is right here. And he is fresh out of mercy". Just everything combining into this *chefs kiss* Perfect

[@pixelwhisper1999]

I love how his speech on the bridge is just a harsher version of the original one