The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies Pitch Meeting

[@DrMcFly28]

Watching this made me realize I remember absolutely nothing about the third movie except for the Super Mario Legolas scene

[@jamesvaneaton4987]

Seriously. Watching some of those scenes I felt like I was seeing them for the first time. So forgettable.

[@Hungabrigoo]

That is the first two movies for me. The third one I remember in vivid detail because I hate every little piece of it.

[@shaz2761]

It was utter shiiite. What a waste. Should have been 2 films.

[@hamzabeg6882]

@@shaz2761 *1 films

[@calvinjohnstone2664]

Don't let it bother you.👍😁

[@thegingergyrl455]

They actually asked Viggo to be in these movies and his response was “my character is not even in the book”...Viggo is ,and Will always be, the best.

[@HitoPrl]

Really? Isn't Aragorn a child during these events?

[@Sublime-ik3lx]

No he was like 30-40

[@Manweaintshit]

@@HitoPrl Yeah, he was 10 at the time (Aragorn was born T.A. 2931; Bilbo goes East T.A. 2941).

[@pwnorbepwned]

@@HitoPrl It’s a deleted scene in Two Towers, but Aragon is actually over 80 years old. He’s got that Numenorian blood; ages gracefully.

[@lueysixty-six7300]

@@pwnorbepwned Gimme some O that!

[@cauchyschwarz3295]

'How does he get the momentum to break up through the ice from underneath the water?' 'Haven't I mentioned that I failed physics?'

[@jesusmora9379]

a wizard did it

[@LuisSierra42]

Magic

[@fermintenava5911]

Boy, I didn't even remember that... That ice was weak, hard to believe they could actually walk on it, let alone battle -.-

[@jordanbitter8858]

"The moral of this trilogy of movies...is don't be greedy" "I see no irony in that whatsoever" Haha that's so good

[@Hirnlego999]

That's so...gold*

[@abhinandsubramanian7088]

Greedy or not, that is comedy gold..

[@SovereignStatesman]

Thorin wasn't even THAT greedy in the book; he just wanted time to consider their claims to the treasure, and wouldn't give up any under threat of force.

[@majorknight859]

Found this comment at 999 likes I obviously hit the like button for the culture

[@hunterkiller1440]

Holy crap, Smaug has the Dooku treatment. Shows up at the end of the second movie and dies at the beginning of the third movie.

[@the-engneer]

That's why I hated these films so much. Smaug is literally one of the coolest characters I've ever read in a book

[@tmitsurugi7777]

@@the-engneer So was Dooku in SW

[@Ixnatifual]

Good. Twice the Dooku, double the Count.

[@raphaelcouture7731]

Thanos too? 😂

[@leonpaelinck]

In the extended version o ROTK, Saruman also kindof has the same treatment

[@bryaneusebio8299]

"I see no irony in that" Nope just gold

[@mcgeethetree3858]

Favourite comment

[@masterofawesomeness5892]

I see no irony in this comment either

[@jacobandersen6075]

Haha

[@tma2001]

except the dwarves from the Iron Hills :)

[@ginsan8198]

Goldy!

[@Deathlygunn]

"This way we can force Aragorn into the movie." - Genuinely Peter Jackson tried to force both Aragorn and Gimli into this trilogy, but John Rhys-Davies turned down the chance to reprise Gimli because he didn't want to have to go through an allergic reaction to the prosthetics again, and Viggo Mortensen refused to appear because Aragorn wasn't in the original story and he didn't want to be a fanbait cameo.

[@youngboss2071]

Good for them 😁 they made a better choice

[@chrissonofpear1384]

Sources, though, @Deathlygunn ? For it being Jackson, and not the studio?

[@Canadish]

@@chrissonofpear1384 Its weird and complicated but for all intents and purposes, PJ WAS the studio's man on these films, they had him over a barrel by threatening to move production away from New Zealand. They said jump, he asked how high. They wanted 3 movies, they got it.

[@KroVey]

@@Canadish so, it wasn't Pj's creative decision? Damn, that's a relief for sure, I was very disappointed

[@Canadish]

@@KroVey Well, it was strictly speaking, but only under duress so I'm not sure I'd count it. He looked like a broken man during the filming of the Hobbit. He lost the reputation and good will from LOTR, damaged he film industry in his country by supporting the studio getting labour protections overturned and compromised his own ideals and artistic vision. Those movies are an utter travesty.

[@MaxiPetrone]

“HE’S IN THE OTHER MOVIE!” Love the way he says it 😅🤣

[@tatianaleutwiler1867]

His inflection is perfect, my favorite quote.

[@mariusvanc]

He's in that OTHER thing that made MONEY!

[@juliegolick]

One of my favorite running gags of the series

[@MaxiPetrone]

@@mariusvanc That’s actually more acurate 🤣

[@Kelarys]

that and "That's the name of the MOVIE" are my favourite quotes, I love the way he says it with such joy

[@johnpotts8308]

"Kili? Sounds like he is one of the dwarfs maybe!" A perfect encapsulation of 95% of the characters in these films.

[@kellnola]

"Rest in peace, dwarf dude, I guess"

[@picardisnotamused67]

Tauriel: “Why does it hurt so much?” Me: BECAUSE IT WASN’T IN THE BOOK

[@Arkylie]

Also, didn't the gal playing Tauriel specifically tell them not to make it a love triangle, and they went "okay" and then made it a love triangle anyway? Also, I hate that they had *her distraction* be the thing that caused her boyfriend to get killed. I mean, I knew he died, just... did it have to be *directly because of* the shoehorned love story???

[@AWMJoeyjoejoe]

@@Arkylie That's true. She made them promise that she wouldn't be in a love triangle, then they brought her back for reshoots because the studio demanded a love story be shoehorned in.

[@Johan.Dingler]

@ accurate

[@TheFourthWinchester]

@ There should be no love triangles. Everyone who talks to her must fall in love. She is that adorable irl.

[@justinamerican8200]

Because he put it in the wrong hole.

[@strikelight1041]

"so that whole story line was kinda" "kinda nothing yeah" i laughed so hard lmao

[@hammondeggs3382]

same

[@emhu2594]

....like the whole movie was kinda nothing

[@welshlout3400]

Like the whole movie was a literal single chapter of story.

[@solitary2]

Ooooh laughing hard is TIGHT

[@chrisowens4550]

Because I sat through this movie, I Laughed and then cried a bit.

[@robertwinsor6128]

The dry-heave vomit reaction after the elf king talks about the elf-dwarf romance being "real" is absolutely one of the funniest moments in the Pitch Meeting series.

[@ianpatterson6552]

Tolkien was spinning in his grave at the thought of a dwarf elf love triangle.

[@Wildwest89]

I heard the dwarve elf love triangle was shoehorned in after filming wrapped by producers who then did reshoots to force that square peg into a round hole

[@ianpatterson6552]

@@Wildwest89 had read things along those lines myself.

[@SeraphsWitness]

I see this problem a lot when writers who aren't even in the same class at Tolkien try to write dialogue and story to match. It just comes across as so cheap in comparison. Like any new Dr. Suess adaptation. The new rhymes are complete trash because nobody has been able to capture his talent.

[@mattlawson714]

@@SeraphsWitness that reminds me of the last two seasons of Game of Thrones when they ran out of source material from George RR Martin. Those two showrunners were getting high on the sound of their own voices explaining episodes. And once they ran out of source material, we all recognized. They were not that great. Their new show “three body problem” is terrible. I’ve read the books it’s so bad.

[@VikingerOnYT]

Looking for "Plot-orcs" again 👀

[@TwoStarPlayers]

This movie does one better, and introduces plot-goats!

[@Сайтамен]

Now it has plot-worms.

[@ilovejettrooper5922]

Which pitch meeting is "Plot-orcs" from again?

[@A_Red_December]

Plorcs?

[@joannabertenshaw6150]

@@ilovejettrooper5922 The second Hobbit movie, I believe.

[@00110000]

Producer Guy: "So you have ANOTHER Hobbit movie for me?" JRR Tolkien: **barrel-rolling in his grave**

[@gregoryschmidt1233]

"You think you can deceive me, Barrel-Roller?"

[@vanderful2397]

Underrated

[@diegoadriandlc5273]

The producer punch Tolkien's Ghost in the belly !

[@42Nightsyesterday]

JRR Tolkien has spun so hard he drilled his way to China

[@ooooneeee]

@@emberpowertcg7692 The Hobbit has already been adapted though and that film was better.

[@_Tree_of_Life_]

Watching these films was like a cat watching birds on a David Attenborough documentary. I was fascinated by the movement, sound and colour, then instantly forgot everything about it the second it was over and went to sleep.

[@ohnonotagain8935]

I barely made it half way before I realized I had no idea what was said, gave up and went to bed

[@Geohillierneo]

"You sure you don't wanna show a giant bear fighting some orcs for a bit?" "I think the audience would rather see some more of the uni brow guy!" 🤣😂🤣🤣😅

[@ericross441]

This sounds so familiar. Oh yeah, because I just watched it

[@Geohillierneo]

@@ericross441 And I'm simply stating what my favourite part of the sketch was mate. But cheers 👍

[@AlucardTheFuckMotheringVampire]

@@Geohillierneo no, you're looking for cheap likes

[@Zift_Ylrhavic_Resfear]

@@AlucardTheFuckMotheringVampire More comments means the video is more recommended so i'm fine with that.

[@NARKISDUDE]

A way to save another couple of million bucks....a bear CGI fight vs. a man in ladies' clothes.

[@kodykozak1326]

Me: *sees new Pitch Meeting is up* WOW WOW WOW, WOW

[@robmiester]

Tight

[@merlinthelemurian3197]

New episodes are TIGHT!

[@Cheesusful]

Getting a notification is super easy barely an inconvenience

[@dfre102]

You're missing a WOW in there.

[@rpsnider85]

Yea yea yeah

[@taylorwef2]

“Tiny Aragorn dwarf” NAILED IT

[@MatiZ815]

Eh... Thorin is much more like Boromir than Aragorn.

[@pearsemolloy9656]

He reminds me more of a tiny Ulfric Stormcloak from Skyrim

[@TeamSukiyo]

imo richard armitage was terribly miscast. he gave a decemt performance, but he was miscast.

[@QuixoteX]

He's like that guy from the other movie!

[@ridensroom6957]

Don't forget the handsome dwarf 😅

[@potzblitz6577]

Gandalf: "So you found a magic ring, where is the magic ring?" Bilbo: "I want you to get all the way off my back now sir." Gandalf: "I will get all off of it now.

[@onkelpappkov2666]

60 years later Gandalf: "So, you have the one ring for me?" Bilbo: "Yes sir, I do."

[@freddykabuffke461]

*slow clap*

[@LuisSierra42]

@@onkelpappkov2666 wow wow wow, wow

[@JayKayEllEmm]

Correction: Bilbo: I’m gonna need you to get allll the way off my back about that magic ring Gandalf: oh, let me get off of that thing

[@theharoldsshow]

Gandalf: I guess that ring was important Bilbo: Oops Gandalf: Oopsie

[@KayDubs77]

Ah yes, The Battle of the Five Pages.

[@Statalyzer]

lol

[@jaakkopontinen]

Commander Keen approves

[@Statalyzer]

@@jaakkopontinen Always nice when somebody gets that reference.

[@Loyal_Lion]

Making a feature length movie from five pages of source material is tight!

[@One.Zero.One101]

You win the best comment of this thread.

[@geardog24]

"Punching ghosts is *TIGHT!* " Hey, save that line for the next Ghostbusters movie.

[@spittingthefires3828]

for the sake of us all I hope there ISN'T a next ghost busters movie!!

[@Thompa93]

@@spittingthefires3828 There's been one on the way since last fall, if I remember correctly. With that guy from Stranger Things.

[@spittingthefires3828]

@@Thompa93 oh boy..... I cringe just thinking about it.... it should be at least funny to laugh at how bad it is, right?

[@Scourge_76]

@@spittingthefires3828 actually it might be decent, it retcons the 2016 movie from existence (thank god) and uses the original movie timeline.

[@spittingthefires3828]

@@Scourge_76 oh really? well then forget EVERYTHING I just said! I'm excited to see it now! unironically it'll probably be quite good.

[@Andrew-ww6es]

the correlation between the moral of the book and the moral of the producers is hilarious

[@dancrane3807]

That's my favorite part of the skit.

[@thirteenthandy]

I'm writing a novel, and came to a stumbling block for my characters when an instant solution presented itself. Then I heard in my head: "Will that be hard for them? No, actually it'll be super easy, barely an inconvenience!" That's when I knew I couldn't let it happen. So yeah, you Pitch Meeting'd my book before it exists. Thanks, I suppose, except now I have a lot more work to do!

[@Eidolon1andOnly]

Work is hard.

[@adammalone3414]

Oh whoopsie.

[@thirteenthandy]

@@adammalone3414 Whoopsie!

[@coryzilligen790]

"Thanks, I suppose, except now I have a lot more work to do!" I think you mean that now it's gonna be super hard, really an inconvenience.

[@theladyamalthea]

My son is also writing a novel, and has also found Pitch Meetings to be helpful for him!

[@jamesduffy7549]

Gandalf not looking into something important for 60 years is accidentally the most books accurate part of the trilogy

[@Madmonkeman]

I think in the book Gandalf didn't know about the ring

[@jeremiahalguire8231]

@@Madmonkeman He Def knew lol Have you actually read the books??

[@Madmonkeman]

@@jeremiahalguire8231 Briefly but it was years ago

[@apexnext]

He knew Bilbo had it. Even in the Hobbit movie he kinda gives an _oh really_ glance at Bilbo's _dropped it_ excuse.

[@kilpta4746]

@@Madmonkeman Gandalf has one of the elven rings of power

[@KnightAlbert]

Worth noticing: when Gandalf tells Frodo about Sauron's story, he forgets to mention that time he actually re-emerged 60 years before.

[@verylostdoommarauder]

That was in the movie, defeating the Necromancer in the books was a somewhat important detail (At least in the Silmarillion explanation of the events)

[@KnightAlbert]

@@verylostdoommarauder Of course I was talking about the movies.

[@SeraphsWitness]

Gandalf withholds a lot of information on purpose. Tolkien was never a fan of exposition dumping like a lot of modern-storytelling is.

[@rayc3103]

"This amazing action sequence, where I failed physics."

[@taylorjade6918]

Had to pause there to laugh my ass off 😂😂😂

[@JordanICM]

high school physics at that!

[@retroarcadefan]

These Hobbit screen rants remind me how hard I try to forget they even existed and I am a huge fan of the book.

[@synthetic240]

silly humans. physics don't apply to elves

[@markjosephbacho5652]

Everyone talking about real life physics when Legolas himself is a freaking elf 😆 and the film is about freaking dwarves and dragon 😆

[@binoonm1838]

"Oh wow that certainly sounds like a thing thats gonna happen in this movie" Best way to sum up dwarf storyline

[@jacobd1984]

Unlike the actual Hobbit movies, this did deserve 3 parts.

[@josiahhughson7437]

Yes I agree with you !!! I personally think the hobbit movies are much better than the lotr movies The only prob with the hobbit movies are that the novel was much better than the movie

[@brianjc720]

@@josiahhughson7437 Bruh you read his comment completely wrong. He’s saying while the Hobbit trilogy did not deserve 3 movies, the Pitch Meetings about them deserved 3 videos because they’re actually entertaining while the Hobbit trilogy was anything but entertaining.

[@josiahhughson7437]

@@brianjc720 Well that makes me a weirdo i guess..... Thanks for Correcting me @Brian Chung

[@brianjc720]

@@josiahhughson7437 No worries man, you enjoy what you enjoy, no shame in that.

[@rebeccahicks2392]

"Oh no, it sounds like he was one of the dwarves, probably!"

[@lieflundmark3564]

"Yeah, we're just gonna kinda end this real fast" "Loose ends are tight!"

[@olorin6494]

Having read the book I didn't even realize how poorly done that was since I just knew all those details already

[@RudolfJvVuuren]

See what you did there.

[@kanyewest9591]

I'm pretty sure if Ryan George made a movie, he would do a pitch meeting about it.

[@theactualbobross5556]

And then the hero did a back flip, snapped the bad guys neck and saved the day.

[@scottjohnnyhelgemoaune2951]

He would probably only talk about the bad things in it, But make it sound like the worlds BEST movie ever!

[@legionarybooks13]

Well he did do a pitch meeting about Pitch Meetings, so there is that. :D

[@tyresebukenya]

@Studio Autio and you really made me think Ryan gosling would be him

[@extraplain2412]

A film where Ryan plays every character.

[@DesolateSecluded]

"He was the John Travolta dwarf" Brilliant😂👌

[@madwibble]

I thought he was the Robbie Savage dwarf.

[@JR-sx3gl]

I don't get it

[@markjosephbacho5652]

@@JR-sx3gl same

[@spencerkindra8822]

And I always thought Kili looked like he was in Motley Crue or another 80s hair metal band haha.

[@DesolateSecluded]

@@spencerkindra8822 lol

[@talesmigliorini5541]

John Travolta Dwarf is awesome, I know him since Saruman's Night Fever

[@viniciusbaeta7997]

“This amazing action sequence where i failed physics in high school ” Also known as The Fast and Furious franchise

[@babyvision6924]

And the Pirates of the Carribean franchise.

[@alvaro.martinez]

I've never seen a video series so repetitive yet so funny, clever and refreshing at the same time.

[@zebrafish7267]

Fun fact, in the extended version of this movie, Alfrid actually does get his comeuppance. He literally gets catapulted into the mouth of a troll. I'm not making this up. And yes, it looks every bit as ridiculous as it sounds. Also, the extended edition is rated R for, and I quote, "some violence". So, yeah. They really bungled this adaptation.

[@Myth_or_Mystery76]

That sounds familar.

[@toolizawesome]

Never seen the extended editions of these movies. I'm gonna someday I hope and I'll be looking forward to this scene.

[@calvinjohnstone2664]

@@toolizawesome this was three times too long anyway, the extended editions of lotr make it worse. If you've read the books anyway.

[@zebrafish7267]

@@calvinjohnstone2664 I disagree about the extended LOTR movies, but I agree on the Hobbit movies in general. They had a couple things here and there that worked, like Martin Freeman as Bilbo (and that's kinda the main thing), and a whole mess of things that didn't.

[@zebrafish7267]

@@toolizawesome Fair warning, they don't really add anything meaningful. I've only see the first 2 extended versions. I haven't actually seen the third extended version, but I have seen the scene in question. It's truly ridiculous.

[@bingobongo1615]

„Alfrid is the key to all of this. He is the funniest character we ever had.“ Probably Pete Jackson

[@DutchDread]

I understood that reference.

[@jesuguru2394]

He's like the jar-jar binks of the Hobbit world...

[@63fan]

Naw, peter jackson barely had control over these movies

[@SeanSpencerNekoEspirito]

@@jesuguru2394 Came here to reply this. Proud of you my son.

[@louislux]

@@63fan How so? He directed it, he wrote the screenplay, approved the awful VFX and spearheaded the frame rate debacle.

[@islamadam8502]

"This guy is barely in his own movie!" 😂😂

[@jiado6893]

That’s unfortunately something that’s based in the original book though.

[@anonymous3637]

Sounds like James Bond these days

[@markjosephbacho5652]

Just like in the book. Was very frustrated the first time I read it. I was waiting for Bilbo's heroic moment and then he got shot on his head and lost consciousness. Meh. And they say Tolkien is a great writer.

[@allenl5960]

@@markjosephbacho5652 Tolkien's works really did not age very well, especially with how much the general audience changed over the years imo. The books have a lot less action, lot more words and descriptions, and much, much less emphasis on the main character's heroic deeds^tm. Compared to most modern fantasy books, it's much slower paced overall. That said, I would argue Bilbo had plenty of heroic moments in the books. He didn't have one for the final battle, but he's hardly the fighting battles type anyways.

[@stardancer119]

@@markjosephbacho5652 Tolkien was a great writer, he just had different priorities than most of today's authors and readers. Having been in WWI and lost so many friends, he hated war, and as I heard someone say, "only used war to let characters love each other as fumblingly as possible." His whole point in The Hobbit was Thorin's line, "Perhaps the world would be a better place if more people valued hearth and home above gold." Bilbo didn't need a heroic moment in battle, because his heroism lay in what he valued most: friendship over wealth, home over fame, a simple life over a dramatic one.

[@noctis69something95]

The response Disney has to every nonsensical thing in their live action remakes. .....”But I WANT IT!”

[@shererid]

His almost-vomiting is hands down my favorite PM moment!

[@alexanderwatson1980]

"Because it was real." *retching sounds*

[@isaacyoung2709]

“This amazing action sequence where i failed physics in high school ” Priceless😂😂😂

[@feynstein1004]

-So, you have a cash grab for me? -Yes, sir I do

[@Its_McKennon]

"I hope so, that was a good punch!" That's it, that's my favorite line in all of these pitch meetings. I snicker every time I'm going through my day and I think about that line. You are a gem Ryan

[@jeffreybogard2713]

Alfryd from this movie makes Jar Jar Binks look like an amazing character.

[@kooijbas]

Let's not get carried away ;)

[@blackmagician7645]

Dragon sickness. Medical Definition- 1. An illness in creed of studio executives and production to drag on a series, with poor results, in order to collect on more financial claim in theatrical sales.

[@mandreadfg]

Science

[@BinkyTheElf1]

Tolkien-Geek here. The SECOND I saw 'Dragon-Sickness', I knew that the proper answer was the Dwarven Ring.. zoom in on the, creepy Mordor music, gold is cursed.... but no. George Jackson-- er, I meant Peter Lucas-- should have left BdT do his own treatment, in the two movies as originally planned. And that's not even to get into the horrid New Zealand government pandering to Hollywood executives and effing over their labour laws, with PJ's acquiescence.....

[@mandreadfg]

@@BinkyTheElf1 BdT would have crushed it for sure

[@janedoex1398]

But Twilight , Harry Potter etc HAD no dragons in there ! How do you explain that ?

[@Jpres_]

Cornetto trilogy pitch meetings would be tight

[@sateadventure6359]

Wow wow wow wow wow

[@DaDude2011]

While waiting for this whole pandemic to blow over. Perfect.

[@jamesmadigan5232]

The line that made me laugh the hardest was, "I sure hope so that was a good punch." Crying

[@alisaurus4224]

I just watched Thor: Ragnarok last night so i thought “Piss off, ghost!”

[@gsuwuhwhdfsuwjwjhw4311]

Unlike the actual Hobbit movies, this did deserve 3 parts.

[@setcheck67]

This whole trilogy is just depressing. They had some major actor talent here and just didn't know what to do with it. Though to be fair they had issues with getting things right for the entire thing.

[@stuartmiller7419]

The sad part is that these actors know that they are appearing in badly conceived, CGI heavy films, but the money is super easy and the acting effort required is barely an inconvenience to them, so they just keep on doing that thing.

[@Gavintherealtor]

The “because it was real” line made my friend make the same noise in the theater when I was in highschool 😂😂

[@that1epsy183]

This was one of the saddest series of movies i ever watched, cause i loved the lord of the rings, and the hobbit was one of my favorite books. And then they did this. And now i want someone to do the hobbit justice and redo everything. :'( pwease

[@Lasmelan]

@Trebuchet I shiver to imagine Middle Earth without Peter Jackson.

[@jamesfrost126]

Back in the 1970's Rankin Bass did an animated version for television. It's aimed at a younger audience so it's not great, but it's much better than The Abomination That Is The Jackson Trilogy, as I call this. I refuse to call it The Hobbit, because it is not The Hobbit.

[@toolizawesome]

@@Lasmelan I always joked that Skinny Peter Jackson ruined the hobbit, we need Chubby Pete to do it right.

[@stephenpedersen5730]

There's a fan edit called the Bilbo Edition. It cuts pretty much every scene Bilbo isn't in, reducing the trilogy into about 4 to 4.5 hours. It was really good.

[@flamingarrow2474]

Oof, well to be honest I loved this trilogy.

[@notfamedtvpersonalitydrphil]

1:28 this is literally the exact same thing my mom said when we were watching the movie

[@cottonballs185]

Cool story, Sakura

[@mariposa9506]

😅

[@fennecfox9490]

My entire family and I always complain about it.

[@kholtonthebarbarian2590]

Same.

[@bait5257]

@@cottonballs185 lmao

[@amidthephantomsrose]

When "super easy, barely an inconvenience." becomes part of your every day vocabulary

[@mariano98ify]

Oh yeah that is TIGHT!!

[@cazog3299]

Whoops.

[@samuelhatlestad6676]

Oh REALLY??

[@kawadashogo8258]

I can only watch so many of these videos at a time because they make me laugh so hard I feel like I'm going to have an aneurysm. The part where the producer gagged almost killed me.

[@BrokenEyes00]

“Because the orcs have the worms from Dune!” Dwarf riding a warthog: “ohhh come on!”

[@baskervillebee6097]

The really do look like Dune worms.

[@ItsTheGuy77]

Writer Guy: "And Tauriel is gonna talk to Legolas's dad & be like, 'Why does love hurt so much?' And he's gonna be like, 'Because it was real'" Producer guy: *Gags* Me: I can relate, producer guy...

[@gpapazac]

I kinda expected George to go for the "Because it wasn't in the books" line but the throw up imitation was also fine

[@geektesse]

I had the same gang reflex when watching the movie in the cinema.

[@devanhinskey9001]

That’s George Lucas level romantic dialogue!

[@noahmlong]

@@devanhinskey9001 I was thinking the same thing! To be more precise: ....I hate sand

[@SquireThomas]

@@noahmlong The delivery somehow makes it even worse, one of the cringiest bits of dialogue I've ever heard in a movie. Not sure if it tops Attack but it's getting close.

[@sebastianarnold948]

“Right when everything’s going bad for the good guys, you know what’s gonna happen?” THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVE!!!!

[@Lttlemoi]

COMING DOWN THE MOUNTAIN SIDE!

[@godemperorofmankind3.091]

And as if in answer there came from far away another note. Horns, horns, horns, in dark Mindolluin's sides they dimly echoed. Great horns of the north wildly blowing. Rohan had come at last.

[@SWHalo2]

Sabaton references are tight!

[@sebastianarnold948]

@@SWHalo2 wow wow wow wow… wow. 👍👍👍

[@KasperochSiri]

I think I've been watching too many Pitch meetings because I'm accually starting to see two different people talking to eachother rather than the same guy playing both. That or Ryan is just a good actor 😁

[@samuelhatlestad6676]

Good actor I think. He does a good job of making their persona’s different.

[@Tonyhouse1168]

It’s clearly 2 different people. I mean, one of them wears glasses!

[@firefiy8789]

@@Tonyhouse1168 My God! He is Superman!

[@lenadrieling8973]

There are actually scenes of the funeral of Thorin, Kili and Fili and the coronation of the new king in the extended cut. You might want to take a look into it. The abandoned plotline about the disappearance of Thorins father also comes to an end in the extended cut of the second movie.

[@carlsiouxfalls]

I think Bilbo actually got more battle screen time in the movie than in the book. In the book he gets bumped on the head right away and misses the whole thing.

[@bpal8240]

I have watched literally every dang pitch meeting episode by now and I am so sad there arent more of Them😅😭 you My Good Sir have saved my quarantine, thank you💯

[@Setcez]

"I suppose killing a dragon of morgoth will be extremely hard" "No, actually it will be super easy! Barely an inconvenience!"

[@Brooke-rw8rc]

"Bardly an inconvenience!"

[@turinturambar1688]

Just stab it’s chest with a weapon that has ‘black’ as a descriptor or be earendil

[@synthetic240]

Where'd you get Dragon of Morgoth from?

[@Swiftbow]

Smaug isn't one of Morgoth's dragons. He's descended from the survivors of Morgoth's dragons.

[@Setcez]

@@Swiftbow sorry, messed up i forgot he was from the third age

[@sabrinah.8141]

"I see no irony in that whatsoever" is so going to be my new catch phrase 🤣🤣🤣

[@remohj]

New catch phrases are tight

[@yoshidinono8095]

*"Punching ghosts is TIGHT! GET OUTTA HERE, GHOST!"* I want that on a shirt.

[@wesleyoldham-cartoonsandtv1962]

Gandalf punching a ghost on front, and the Ghostbusters logo on the back

[@bryondevine4224]

Me too👏👏👏

[@paulianhodgson]

Should have said “piss off ghost”, like from Thor Ragnarok 😅

[@valkyrie-randgris]

@@paulianhodgson Honestly thought they were going to go for the "piss off ghost" reference. :p

[@Сайтамен]

Busting ghosts is even tighter.

[@calebwinfield1403]

The ending where he's sent to find Aragorn: The timeline from the battle of the five armies and when Aragorn was known as "Strider" is off by a good amount of years. They couldn't even get that right

[@SomewhatSlightlyBored]

Checked the timeline and Aragorn was 10 years old when The Hobbit took place.

[@maxdecphoenix]

@@SomewhatSlightlyBored Aragon is 87 years old in Two Towers. Per his conversation with Eowyn when she is trying to chat him up. That should make him 16~ during this film. In Two Towers he is said to have ridden with Theodin's father in to battle while Theodin was still very young. Theodin looks to be 55 year old man in two towers. so yea, definetly no way he could have been going by Strider yet.

[@tomerfeller9993]

i just realized how great and underrated the line "HIS FROM THE OTHER MOVIES!" really is. Pointing obvious cash grab techniques using script-unrelated characters from the main movie series of the same franchise is TIGHT!

[@devanhinskey9001]

*Before watching the video:* I’ve been waiting a long time for this. Hopefully it’ll all be worth it. *After watching the video:* Yup. Totally worth it.

[@BWoodTTV]

I haven't seen any of these movies but I've watched all of the pitch meetings

[@123gingka]

I'm curious, what's the appeal of this?

[@WillJM81280]

You know all you need to know.

[@GandalfEragonPotter]

You should watch the lotr and hobbit They are great movies

[@WillJM81280]

@@123gingka Not wasting hours and hours on shitty movies.

[@Dargonhuman]

@@123gingka It's like the Cliff's Notes for movies - you learn the important parts of the movie without sitting through all of the bullshit parts of the movie.

[@ChumblesMumbles]

I was quite impressed with how Jackson/Walsh/Boyens were able to chop up and mix around the Lord of the Rings book scenes into 3 complete and coherent films that each made sense and worked as films for the most part. The source material wasn't structured in a way that lent itself to the screen, and almost without exception all the cuts/additions/changes they did made sense and were really well done. Then comes the Hobbit and it's as if a completely different set of people were handling that story. Everything they added was trash and all their decisions were horrible.

[@ashleighelizabeth5916]

And what has Jackson done since then? Pretty much zippo! Talk about a career that went up and came back down like a bottle rocket....

[@syasyaishavingfun]

@@ashleighelizabeth5916 he's probably at home playing with his figurines and cosplaying. He has all the money to just not do anything.

[@Matthew-ve7uv]

Uh ... Get Back? Huge commercial and critical success?

[@rev.chuckshingledecker]

To be fair, most of the terrible story decisions were forced by the Studio, including the dwarf/elf romance and making it 3 movies instead of 2. The latter ended up leading to all of the other horrible decisions by the creators.

[@vjbd2757]

@@ashleighelizabeth5916 He did an awesome colored, framerate, and sound restoration of black and white World War 1 footage

[@fennecfox9490]

"Oh a very strangely motivated lizard!" That killed me.

[@jpenn9635]

“So, you have another Hobbit movie for me?” “Yes sir I do!” “But why though?”

[@odeleon24]

So the movie can happen

[@jotheunissen9274]

Because money Ooh, I like money

[@Kittsuera]

@@jotheunissen9274 "well okay."

[@Nolan_Dykstra]

This is my absolute favorite ongoing series on KZbin, I look forward to every episode and they do not disappoint. I would love to see you tackle some of the classic Universal Monster movies from the 30s and 40's!

[@jpthrower8451]

In watching some of your recent Screen Rants, including the Twilight series and this series, I realize you have an incredible ability to sit through movies like this while paying attention.

[@justinbellotti7838]

It is amazing how many of these there are and it still keeps its quality and humor. Long running successful comedy skits that keep their quality are tight, especially how he makes it look super easy, barely an inconvenience. Well done as always, keep up the amazing job.

[@sacredstar9]

"This guy is barely in his movie" Main criticism for the upcoming first ryan George cinematic Universe movie

[@SidPil]

"So you have an original comment for me?" "No sir i don't"

[@danielsusalla5427]

That gag after the "because it was real line" has to be a reference to the producer guy being lactose intolerant and not being able to handle all that cheese right

[@pristajem]

"Galadriel turns on the scary mode and Sauron is like okay I'll leave stop yelling" 😂😂😂😂😂

[@blueshit199]

"hate nagging wife"

[@ianpatterson6552]

Ryan was mercifully unknowing about the yet unrevealed horrors of the Rings of Power, when he made this.

[@gagaplex]

"Because it was real." About the relationship with a character that wasn't in the book. Who are you trying to convince, Jackson? Us or yourself?

[@amberd.883]

Thanks for the dry heave at the "why does love hurt? Because it was real" line.. I didn't even watch that movie and hearing about that part made me wretch.

[@LadyDoomsinger]

"We're gonna give [Alfred] a massive amount of screen-time, and he's not going to change or learn anything?" I can so relate to that character arc!

[@ladyalaina42]

He gets himself killed for yet more coin. Dragons win.

[@Narcan885]

One of the best Pitch Mettings ever. You really exposed all the illogical things and the sheer greediness and nonsense that is this movie. Really stingy, really deep insights, i loved it!

[@criminallettucewraps5207]

Someone I work with showed me your channel and I cannot stop. This is the greatest thing I've ever seen. It's tight!

[@christianhardtofind6349]

My favorite pitch meeting. I've pretty much memorized this one from watching it so much!

[@SoCalChemistry]

In the extended edition, Alfrid dies and Beorn is shown fighting the orcs as a bear. It's pretty satisfying to watch.

[@maxthecharacter1296]

4:54 I relate to this part so...so much. 🤣

[@USMC49er]

I lost it at that part

[@TheAlpacalypseIsUponUs]

This movie is so forgottable, for a while I thought I hadn't even seen it.

[@MaliciousCat]

I like Hershe's ending better. Bilbo tells Thoren he should keep the 'shiney armor' and wear it himself for the battle ahead since he's King and is important and just give it to him at the end of the battle. And when the 'White Orc' stabs him in the chest... it wouldn't go through, so the Orc dies and Thoren is still alive. Haha!

[@leahl5007]

That Alfred guy was an offense to Tolkien and all the fans.

[@AzLolFun]

I actually enjoy the first two hobbits for the most part even though they obviously drag on a bit. This one felt like a chore to finish and by the time it was over I was just like "wow. That's it."

[@richarddoan9172]

It was a based on only 2 or 3 pages from the book.

[@bingobongo1615]

Yeah it’s horrific. It falls apart while watching. Starting rushed but ok, then just turns to madness. Basically every scene is ridiculous and then it just ends wrapping up nothing

[@AzLolFun]

@@bingobongo1615 absolutely nothing. People love to joke about Return of the Kings finale but they wrapped up every storyline and gave us a bittersweet but satisfying ending

[@scorpleeon]

Wowwowwowwowwow...

[@TheJimSkipper]

Drag on.

[@bdb1052]

"why does it hurt so much" "Because it was reeal" 🤢🤢🤮 🤣🤣🤣

[@flatebo1]

"So we're gonna give this guys a massive amount of screen time and the character is not gonna change or learn anything." "That's right." "Well OK, then." - say the guys who've been given a massive amount of screen time, but have never changed or learned anything.

[@jameswhitley4101]

"I see no irony in that whatsoever."

[@EmonEconomist]

"That tiny Aragorn-dwarf Thorin" 🤣🤣 Perfect!

[@angharad5932]

There was exactly one scene in the movie that actually felt like the book .. and it was when Bilbo curled up and started sobbing when Thorin died. Go Martin Freeman! I don't even want to discuss what they did to Thranduil's character.

[@SeenAGreatLight]

That was a genuinely heartbreaking moment. Martin Freeman is a genius. ...But why did they have to _immediately_ cut to Tauriel right afterwards? Kinda deflated the whole moment.

[@Eleseasin]

"Because it was real" *retching* I had to laugh at that one xD

[@Doctor_C_Jack]

Please do a How to Train Yout Dragon Pitch Meeting

[@elvancor]

It's funnier with bad movies

[@sebastianbrown2270]

@@elvancor I'm not saying it's bad but one way to attack it would be that they don't follow the books at all

[@elvancor]

@@sebastianbrown2270 the wat

[@sebastianbrown2270]

@@elvancor how to train your dragon was a long running book series I'd recommend them they are really good and have an entirely different story to the movies

[@elvancor]

@@sebastianbrown2270 I should've known... they don't come up with actually good movies without copying from an actual author. Thanks, but I won't be reading children's books. I'm more into movies, I love that movie and it's all I need.

[@Kalenz1234]

There are two good scenes in the entire hobbit trilogy. Bilbo talking with Gollum. Bilbo talking with Smaug. That's it. You can cut everything else and will miss nothing.

[@dunderthunder9858]

The dumbest part of thranduil telling legolas to go meet strider is that legolas meets him for the first time at the council of elrond.

[@natecw4164]

It must be pretty hard to watch the first two movies and then skip this one. Actually it was super easy, barely an inconvenience!

[@olandir]

Exactly!

[@jeremybk54]

oh really

[@ElusiveEllie]

I did this too. After the second one, I gave up entirely. Better to let my memories of the book live on the way they are.

[@Myth_or_Mystery76]

More like watch the first, skip the second, and watch the third just to conclude the story. The second one is barely a plot.

[@imjohan2]

@Trebuchet you sound like a great boyfriend x)