Shrek Lied About His Name? | Late Night Tumblr Posts

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[@JamesTheCelestial]

What if Shrek didn't *have* a name before Donkey asked? Everyone avoided him, clearly.

[@wolfsong9134]

Omg you have a point.......

[@No1AldamonFanGirl]

Ouch... Okay, I didn't need my heart for anything, just go ahead and smash it with that realization that makes TOO MUCH SENSE!

[@JenniNoMercy]

Or.....He was just so shocked someone actually had the common decency to just ASK him his name. Like, "Wow....this guy actually doesn't care I'm a monster.....weird"

[@endorneyodera4366]

@@JenniNoMercy this feels like youre implying shrek is a tsundere towards donkey And im oddly okay with that

[@reednitz5132]

@@endorneyodera4366 no, for the love of God no

[@5192aaron]

"I'm convinced Shrek madr it up on the spot." I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE! He also pauses before telling Fiona, like he was like "The Hell did I tell Donkey? Oh yeah. Shrek."

[@AkumaDayo]

Either that or he keeps getting pleasantly surprised when people _actually_ want to know his name so he's shocked for a short time before answering He's also probably never had to introduce himself before, so maybe he doesn't say his name out loud often and like split second forgot his name. Kinda like when you have a brain fart sometimes after someone asks you what your birthday is There are a lot of possible reasons he hesitated, these are my theories :)

[@5192aaron]

@@AkumaDayo Touche, amigo.

[@thewolfman5362]

@@AkumaDayo fair point, but I would rather think he lied. Makes it funnier.

[@seanmcfadden3712]

@@AkumaDayo That's my theory as well!

[@sigma2789]

Or his name is Shrek

[@thatonesentientbagel4043]

Hey, whom ever wants to see me... get away creep. You can’t see this giant bagel

[@deamoncastor7307]

I think I should just back away from this comment post.

[@moodymoosh]

But if it were me I'd really wanna be A giant bagel

[@finndarling]

the bagel is sentient it experiences pain now

[@dylansickinger545]

But you just look like a regular sized bagel.

[@KasaiBuru]

IT WON'T BE FOREVERRRR

[@Moss_Dude]

Nobody: The parrot: *Hello darkness my old friend,* *I've come to get head pats again.*

[@visualgagging]

Nobody comments aren’t funny

[@Moss_Dude]

@@visualgagging Couldn't think of a different way to phrase the joke.

[@artisticcrystallight459]

I cannot Express how much I love this comment

[@miletilblight2181]

Nah that don't sound right Lemme fix it Hello darkness my old friend I've come to get head pats once again

[@Smartfmella69]

Hey I was drunk and broke into a custom shop and became a bird and killed millions of bees and now I'm wanted in India so yeah that's why I'm here

[@Shadowrunner123]

Shrek made up his name because he didn't live with anyone before, so he had to invent it on the spot.

[@dusksunsetio6042]

wait what about his parents

[@mimictear6788]

@@dusksunsetio6042 They tried to eat him.

[@tori8956]

Cultist simulator!!!

[@cherrycola6736]

@@mimictear6788 What, you don't name your children before eating them?

[@KIWI_DUDE.]

Schreck is also german for fright. He 100% made it up on the spot based on all the villagers running away from him.

[@RyukenAtrineas]

Shrek also paused before saying his name to Fiona, too. If he came up with it on the spot for Donkey, maybe he was trying to remember what he said, to answer her?

[@popgoestheweasel3974]

Shrek monologue: “What tf did I tell my ass my name was? OH YEAH! Hi, I’m Shrek”

[@AshtonSnapp]

If I ever come across a crowbar I’m going to assume I ended up in a Half-Life game and pick it up.

[@sirapple589]

Only do that if you’re wearing an HEV suit and a weird man has stopped time to talk to you. Don’t wanna spark a columbine takeover because you couldn’t keep your goddamn hands off a bent piece of metal.

[@miletilblight2181]

That would mean valve unlocked true virtual reality without us noticing

[@AshtonSnapp]

i did not expect this comment to get likes.

[@BookWyrmOnAString]

Equip it

[@jjrulez1596]

I mean, fair assumption

[@TheAustronaut03]

Two shrews chilling in the Arctic five feet apart

[@joshuasanders162]

One is dead, cus they're not gay.

[@AverageEldritchEntity]

THEY EAT EACH OTHER

[@thedeterminedsoul4900]

Cuz they're not gey

[@thealientree3821]

That’d be SIX feet apart!

[@tbotalpha8133]

Having a Stand battle.

[@Ghiaman1334]

2:26 Oh thank god someone said it! I still have a bunch of cool stickers and stuff but I don't want to use them in case I find a better thing to put them on. They're like video game healing items - there's always the threat of a bigger emergency

[@shadowdragon2730]

*gets through game never using them* WHAT IF THERE'S A BIGGER EMERGENCY????

[@vd6070]

me in skyrim... and then I get brutually raped by a drauger lord seven times with Lydia probably internally screaming at my neglect to use potions

[@soup6163]

Ya see this is why I like magnets

[@TheLuckySpades]

I've had a collection of band and event stickers that has been growing for the last 5 years, almost put them on my old laptop, bricked it a few days after I started tbinking that, scared to put them on the new one now

[@FoxDren]

May I suggest magnets. They're like stickers but you can move them.

[@thisisaboatwhyismyusername2807]

I bet that Parrot thinks that the darkness was void of emotion when it wouldn't pet it.

[@dylansickinger545]

*distant sound of one person laughing.*

[@ArteArt39]

@@dylansickinger545 _That person is me_

[@fiend-off-the-grid]

@@ArteArt39 everyone else is just exhaling out of their nose

[@marshmallowallen5677]

A nerdy artist *BUT I TELEPORT IN, LAUGHING

[@rhiannonbamford8741]

Context about Blissey! Blissey has the highest base HP stat in the entire series at 255, and it is possible for it to reach 741 HP at level 100 with proper breeding and training. Even though Close Combat has 120 base power and is super-effective against Blissey, you'd need a Pokemon with a base Attack stat of over 100 to actually do any proper damage to it. Oh, and _it can flipping heal itself._

[@Anaklusmos42]

Well, you'd be half correct about the two part joke. In fact, it is in two parts and far apart in the video for one specific reason. Diamond and Pearl are notorious for having sloooooow hp bars, coupled with the highest hp pool, it takes hours to end the animation of the hp being reduced

[@wumpus976]

It could probably handle getting damaged by Arceus, the Pokémon GOD ITSELF.

[@thequagiestsire]

@@wumpus976 It definitely could, since it has great Special Defense and I have yet to see someone not run a special set with Arceus. If it went physical, however, Blissey would be done for, considering it only has 10 Defense.

[@spirityt2192]

Dude I tried to catch an alpha blissey in legends arceus and I ended up failing it because it kept healing constantly and would just never attack and I ran out of pokeballs

[@loganmason5421]

Legend has it, the Blissy’s health is still going down to this day, prophecies foretell that the close combat won’t be enough to defeat it, and the opponent will use a full restore next turn. Those unfortunate enough to meet eyes with the trainer are said to have lost so much time, they were late to their own death. The ones who have encountered first hand battles with this sunofab-word and his team of 6 lvl 100 blissys have named him... the life-eater

[@gingermcgingin1733]

Then, when at last the Blissy is defeated, Shuckle shall take it's place.

[@fiend-off-the-grid]

I'm convinced that my little sister got some weird blessing from the fey or some sh*t, because she can _reliably move stickers._ Doesn't matter how old the sticker is, or how long it's been there, she can remove it and stick it somewhere else. She even once took one *OUT OF A 10 YEAR OLD STICKER JOURNAL* and got it off _without even tearing the page._ This is magic and you can't convince me otherwise.

[@AverageEldritchEntity]

Your... your sister... good god.

[@AbadonXXX]

Never fear the void, pet the eldritch fluff

[@NoirRaven]

Wow, Waluigi and Wario look so much better with sleep. 😂

[@darksentinel082]

When you put this into a binge compilation you need to have the blissey bits at the beginning and the end of the compilation for added effect

[@Smok_Argus]

'nb people are just a swarm of bees in disguise' ... why does it seem so accurate...? Damn ;w; I feel called out

[@aromanticfranziskavonkarma]

*The binaries know our secrets* *We must erase their memories*

[@greenrena8503]

"2:50" I can't bee the only on to stop there beecause GIANT FLUFF BEE

[@clemente3966]

If I ever come across a crowbar, I would be glad I found the first piece of a potential cosplay of Ryuji in his Phantom thief outfit

[@fungleung0219]

I LIVE for Seymour singing Giant Bagle(giant woman from Steven Universe parody)

[@theclodofclods]

I was busy watching 2000s commercials, but for you I stopped.

[@AverageEldritchEntity]

Return to whence you came from.

[@TojiOkano]

Imma just say this for fun, my then cat likes belly rubs.

[@themathhatter5290]

Good post OP.

[@IamaPERSON]

My cats don't.

[@silkyxcore5497]

My imaginary dog likes pats on the head ^^

[@thewall4069]

I dont have friends

[@Z3TSU91]

Funny thing, an artist I follow made a comic out the last one (or his wife, I forgot) and IT'S WHOLESOME. (the artist is Darksilvania btw)

[@dfquartzidn6151]

WHERE’S THE LINK?

[@moodymoosh]

Seymour: *starts singing giant woman but it's a bagel* Me even after it's at the next song: Oh I know it'll be great and I just can't wait to see the bagel you are together But if it were me I'd really wanna be A giant bagel

[@joda7697]

I will forever have the DBZA version stuck in my head personally.

[@bagelguy_9174]

Hm

[@alicesmith255]

And if it were me I'd really wanna eat A giant bagel

[@Barrabbazz]

​@@joda7697 So i´m not the only one!

[@camerondon3712]

I didn't know the name of the song and just thought it was the scooby doo theme.

[@mistertea603]

So Shrek never even had a name before he met his friends...Damn, talk about character development and- **THE** **POWER** **OF* ***FRIENDSHIP***

[@venusblade4ever]

WAIT?!? Does that mean... his parents never named him or did he just totally forget his real name because he got used to being called “The Ogre”/“The Ogre in the Swamp”. Either way, that is super sad! Unless... Ogres are a weird mythical creature who chooses their own name after someone asks them “what is your name?” after they have lived their life of being alone (Which I hope is the case, because otherwise I’m gonna cry)

[@ChitenBugMan]

The musical shows he lived with his family until he was 7 before he left, he probably didn't repeat his name much until he met Donkey.

[@camblycreeper7999]

According to VTM Bloodlines; where your BOSS, is named La Croix, everyone says La Croy

[@flooferderp2918]

Hey I just got that game for my birthday!

[@smilehappyface8]

I'm playing it for the first time with wesp5 unofficial patch and it's wonderful

[@camblycreeper7999]

@@smilehappyface8 some quick advice, even though the patch is working, expect issues. Mainly the Sunrise hotel, weird things all over there. Also the Confesions place once had the spinning bit in the door just... stop... in a way that locked me there forcing me to go back to the last save, in the office room i'd just cleaned up. Hope you enjoy

[@smilehappyface8]

@@camblycreeper7999 You can ask the lady to remove the spinning door and she will. I have yet to get to the sunrise hotel. Which area is that in? I'm in the Chinatown part now. The place I get the most glitches is my Skyeline apt., but I just reload the game and it's fixed.

[@camblycreeper7999]

@@smilehappyface8 Nope, Skyline is the place where the problem is, be wary of that. sometimes the buttons break, sometimes the door handles become other objects of nonsense and I've heard bad things about moving there with a ghoul

[@Lotus201877]

LOL Owner: "PET THE BIRD!" Ghost: "OK FINE!" Bird: *Happy squawking* Owner: Peace has been restored. Ghost: :/ Bird: :D

[@47ratsinahoodie]

Oh my gosh, someone accurately described why I despise stickers. And I feel called out.

[@critch7514]

3:53, or they could just be stand users

[@gingermcgingin1733]

"Behold the power of my stand, 「The Cremation of Sam McGee」! "

[@marshmallowallen5677]

Ginger McGingin EXFUCKINGSCUSE ME THE WHAT!

[@marshmallowallen5677]

Ginger McGingin I’ve never heard it

[@NIDELLANEUM]

2:10 I randomly remembered that time in high school when the thing you use to open and close windows (I forgot the English word!) broke so I was going to find a janitor after picking it up to fix it. I felt like I suddenly was in a Rockstar game

[@AkumaDayo]

The latch? Maybe? Or the handle? I'm just trying to help you remember the word haha

[@GURGLEGUY12345]

Even as a kid, Shrek's pause before saying his name struck me as suspicious.

[@omega4837]

Man, Waluigi and Wario are the most relatable characters in the Mario franchise.

[@thatonesentientbagel4043]

So uh, somebody, uh once, told me, that uh, the, World? Was, gunna roll, me

[@eliasmachalek4856]

You are the biggest bagel in the shed

[@scianigreen2513]

Why did I read this in Jeff Goldblum’s voice? 😂

[@curlamus4452]

ZA WARUDO

[@bagelguy_9174]

Ok

[@dudenamedzelda3179]

Is it weird that I want Cyana in Flork of Cows?

[@legoben98productions]

I always thought that the pause from sherk is just him questioning if he should talk to donkey.

[@niccotango1382]

My favorite part is that the URL of the person who made the Octopus Garden joke was "Paul's broken a glass"

[@kimarous]

Regarding the engine smoke: one time in fifth or sixth grade, one of the cars driving in at the end of school (since most kids drove to school and were picked up) started belching smoke from the hood - initially white that turned YELLOW. Thought it was going to explode, left before it got fixed, never heard the aftermath. Any idea what YELLOW smoke from the engine means?

[@deamoncastor7307]

Sulfur in the engine.

[@expikah]

@@deamoncastor7307 Man these drivers really gotta stop using Hellfire in their fuel.

[@themountainman3191]

Yellow smoke is normally indicative of a sulfur based combustion, but ive personally only heard of sulfur being added to the fuel of large shipping boats... maybe the bus had a sulfur additive in the coolant?

[@madafaka2666]

You found a shiny

[@MapleZer0]

was the car yellow? if so the car paint decided nothing white belonged with it

[@laurenlincoln9587]

Regarding Shrek. In Shrek the Musical it opens with Shrek's parents kicking him out of the house at seven, and only refer to him as "Son" It's incredibly plausible he came up with a name on the spot

[@arieljimenez1596]

*WAIT THERE'S A SHREK MUSICAl*

[@hat7475]

@@arieljimenez1596 kskskekekeekekel

[@anonymouspotato7538]

Shrek is his actual name. He's originally a German character, and "schreck" is the German word for "fright" His name is literally Scary

[@AverageEldritchEntity]

In that case, wouldn't it be... S H R I E K

[@ZeldaRoseSongbook]

Yas dood! Living for the content!!!

[@fireheart1231]

Mr. Seymour... it's pronounced *Ka-zm* not *Cha-zm*

[@PMSeymour]

Dont make me do another video

[@FanOfMostEverything]

Careful, we don't want another trebuchet incident ... Or do we? EDIT: And apparently Seymour beat me to the joke. Well then.

[@forgotenwarfox-9769]

I’m not sure if that’s a threat or a plea of “let me rest”

[@seanmcfadden3712]

@@PMSeymour (Lucy from Disenchantment voice) Do it. Do IT. Doitdoitdoit!!!

[@jaschabull2365]

Ghost: *is trying to stroke the bird, but fails to evoke tactile feeling due to being ethereal* ;-;

[@americanviking9846]

I'm convinced he paused because he made up a name long time ago and forgot what it was since no one had ever asked him.

[@krmel6020]

The best moment is at 4:08, when he says "hello" in a parrots voice. I absolutely love that.

[@KilosFoxo]

I saw the thumbnail knew something was off but now what was off

[@Rainbow-eb9wh]

I 100% thought the same thing about shrek

[@wolfsong9134]

Also, it's pronounced "Le Crap" PM. 🤣 Thought you should know.

[@aceofspades6789]

Legend has it he’s still fighting blissey to this day

[@RexiChan19]

That ghost should just get over themself and pet the sweet bird.

[@chiroptera626]

The bird was of charismatic character towards the chasm. The bird tried to charm its way through the challenge but was left with a chilly silence. A lesson in "CH".

[@ingot5396]

3:22 SCP-096 AKA SHYGUY!!!! YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHER WISE

[@Ribbons0121R121]

"what is he doing?" reincarnation realization

[@AverageEldritchEntity]

*A DOG'S PURPOSE FLASHBACKS*

[@ItsJustVirgil]

Bird is adorabible.

[@Ralom98]

I've had a pack of temporary butterfly tattoos for years cause id be sad after they were gone. they're too pretty to use and they'd be gone forever.

[@HallowedTyrfing]

nb is actually an acronym for Numerous Bees

[@newspaper_stand]

2:12 2:32 4:05 Wow I love The Magnus Archives

[@eliasmachalek4856]

The last one just killed me! PT D BIRB!

[@thatlycantomboy]

my mom literally bought a entire pack of la croix because I’ve never had it and she wanted me to experience the lack of flavor firsthand

[@abidizzne892]

Sometimes my dog will put her hands on my kitchen table and look like a human

[@critch7514]

2:51 Why wouldn’t you wanna become the cursed skeletons, *Bink’s Sake Intensifies*

[@dunmaglass6016]

4:23 "CH-asms are not friend" Ooooooooooooooooooooo BOY, 'ERE WE GO AGAIN!

[@no_enerji]

Item Unlocked: Magic Metal Pipe of Pain!

[@natalietodd3431]

My friend couldn't come up with a name for himself in French so he panicked and said "La Croix" when the teacher asked for his French name. Now every time she asks him a question she goes, "La Croix?"

[@TheAdvertisement]

3:19 I raise you Sans the skeleton.

[@kyokono6465]

Dear ghost or shadow demon: when the birb asks you for pets... YOU PET THE BIRB

[@beepboez]

one time i got an ad on tumblr but the picture was just a sliced up banana being boiled and i have never felt more threatened in my entire life

[@jayoticnl5222]

3:25 that description also eerily matches sans

[@TempoName]

I'm glad you came back to the Blissey after a few minutes lmao

[@fadingzenith3198]

0:45 i knew where this was going from the start 🥺🥺 just wish we got that pic of him in an orange blanket

[@thegamingvampire5858]

Pm: *posts a new video* Me: Ah yes, serotonin

[@ace_pace_face2466]

i am never ready for those endings.... they always catch me off guard

[@noivernblast3366]

Day 67 of quarantine: Blissey is still not dead, my Heracross looks longingly at me, waiting for this battle to end.

[@overlycynicalstudios5280]

Poor bastard

[@corgiplant9986]

PET THE BIRD! this has brightened my morning

[@videogamefan101]

Jesus, well-rested Wario and Waluigi look pretty happy and carefree.

[@casualdork6661]

The thumbnail activated my fight-or-flight response

[@ZombiePolish]

2:53 *FINALLY SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS ME*

[@CallieSqueakz]

(3:52) I am disbelief. I am *genuinely* in disbelief. How dare that person run Physical Defense EVs on a Blissey. Either that or the Gen 4 slowness has struck.

[@pugwithagun8121]

i never knew the "all i wanna do" song was originally a steven universe song... i just know it from dragon ball z abridged pfft

[@ShursGarden]

I thought he was gonna sing that in the What's New Scooby Do theme.

[@phoelynfabulous]

The song is called Giant Woman! And if you don't watch Steven Universe, that only makes it more confusing.

[@flamewerewolf9569]

I just found you and I love the way you read stuff, you put so much energy into it, and it makes the posts more funny *tHE NONBEENARIES*

[@thomaschristensen2941]

Never forget to break the random barrels dispersed through the city, too! They may contain inexplicably recently cooked chicken!

[@starmade4547]

I've been grinding FFXIV all day, and my brain is SO fried, I thought the title said "Snerk" and I was so confused

[@Hawkens4k]

Wario is just Seymour if he never had a youtube channel.

[@Helltamirre]

Needy, I got one of those spicy ads! It was all bloody Barclaycard until now...

[@rijaja]

Fun fact: In France, La Croix is bleach. At least you feel the difference between it and water.

[@leeshajoi]

"Shrek" is derived from a Yiddish word meaning "fright" or "fear." _He literally named himself "scary thing."_

[@StarkMaximum]

I swear to god I saw this title and thought it said "Stark lied about his name?" and freaked the fuck out wondering how Seymour knew who I was

[@ldbonq]

nb stands for numerous bees

[@TailsClock]

"La croix is pronounced however, it's stupid" Yeah! "CH asm" NO!

[@AverageEldritchEntity]

Ahem: LA CROIX IS IS FRUIT JUICE TRAPPED IN THE CAVE ALLEGORY.

[@python1972]

That ghost is probably so sad that the bird can't feel his pets as he furiously pets it willing that one of his ghost hands is able to be felt...for even just a second.

[@cloverlovania]

0:42 It could be any one of us! It could be me, it could be you, it could even be...

[@MIZUKIfutagoKUMI]

The solution for the sticker trouble are STAMPS As long as there is still space for me to stamp a cute bunny on anything, I am happy

[@connorwilliams5785]

1:12 it's Jay's dog from Big Mouth

[@TheSt0neK1ng]

There is nothing worse than a rude ghost. But, If you pet the bird and make kissy noices back (even if they sound like screeches) you're good and can haunt my house however long you want.

[@LadyEvilest]

My explanation about why Shrek hesitates. He's just not used to people asking his name. Everyone else who's ever met him just screamed "AAH! Ogre!" Donkey was the first one he met in a long time who cared more about who he was than what he was and it threw him for a loop.

[@queenks9150]

Clearly NB stands for Not Bees, that way no one will realize that they are actually bees

[@spinz7306]

3:54 Nah they were just fighting with stands.

[@Silverwind87]

I wonder if they ever killed that Blissey.

[@bethello1286]

0:40 1 out of 4 people are gay... Pride beetle.

[@ChknKng]

Get a Pokémon with a maxed attack stat and Contrary and that Blissey should go down like a bitch.