Mixed-ish and What I Really Need to Say About My Race

No video

Mixed-ish and What I Really Need to Say About My Race

Рет қаралды 175,318

4 жыл бұрын

A hella imperfect rant about my experience as a mixed women and the joys of being seen, loved and supported by black women. Thank you. Also encouraging you to checkout Mixed-ish the new show from the Black-ish Grown-ish family.
Books by black women you should checkout please send suggestions on more you've read and loved
www.amazon.com...
www.amazon.com...
www.amazon.com...
www.amazon.com...

Пікірлер: 1 900

@janetcousins4645 4 жыл бұрын

Halle Berry has always thanked the black community for making her feel welcome.

@marksmall1476 4 жыл бұрын

She's a hot chick that's why.

@lakeside321 4 жыл бұрын

Halle Berry father is African American, so half of her family is undeniably black.

@Noxolo_Shangase 4 жыл бұрын

I've met a lot of mixed people, who say their black side of their family was more welcoming and their white side was judgemental and racist. I guess it all depends on the people.

@lakeside321 4 жыл бұрын

How many mixed race were shot by the cops this year?

@SairahScott 4 жыл бұрын

@@Noxolo_Shangase opposite for me

@msandrews87 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for being so self aware. As a black woman, people do expect us to do all the work. Make people feel comfortable and accept them even when they don't accept us. I believe now black people will say that someone is not black immediately because for so long people who looked like us/had hair like us would say "oh I'm not black I'm native, I'm not black I'm creole, I'm not black I'm Puerto rican". Completely erasing their blackness and making people who identified as black feel less than.

@ellajohnson2257 4 жыл бұрын

I had a friend at school who to be was black but according to her she wasn't black she was "mixed". Her mother was mixs and her father was black.

@msandrews87 4 жыл бұрын

@@ellajohnson2257 This!!! I'm glad that people are finally proud of their blackness (I'm sure that friend is identifying as just black now) but I wish they didnt feel it necessary to put us down along their journey.

@jenn8721 4 жыл бұрын

msandrews87 🤗🤗🤗🤗

@Mm-wq6no 4 жыл бұрын

I'm Puerto Rican and I consider my self black too, a little of everything you know since we are mixed. But, if people say that they are puertorican they are not denying that they are black. They are letting you know they are mixed and that they also speaks spanish and are from the caribbean. 2 years ago or more, people asked me if I am black I used to say yes because I'm puertorican but now I've been hearing in youtube, in the comments of the fans of the TV show The Real, that people say that everybody wants to be black, and they say to the mixed people(mixed americans) oh you're not full black enough, that to that point, you don't even know what to say anymore. BECAUSE if you say you are not black, then it's 'cause you feel ashamed or etc, and if you say you are black, they say everyone wants to be like us, so pick one either you brush your hair or put rolls in it, pick one. (That's an expression). But anyways and I tell myself, when you're mixed you know what you are and nobody can't deny you what you are and how you feel. Anybody understand what I'm trying to say?

@knpoindexter 4 жыл бұрын

I feel like we should let people tell us how they identify and let us tell them who they are and believe them. Being creole also includes blackness in its definition. Sometimes people really aren't ashamed of blackness, but don't want their other identities erased in the process and space should be made for that too!

@cherellletterboom6456 4 жыл бұрын

I think the black community is more inclusive than any other community. If you have a part of blackness in your blood, you are always included. That what makes it such a special community. And i am not even talking about the black community in the US. Here in the Netherlands it is the same way.. I am Surinamese, mixed indian/african. The indian community doesn’t accept but my african black diaspora community does. Much love for them ♥️

@msgirly6827 4 жыл бұрын

I feel like that can be a negative thing as well at the same time.

@absolutelyjolly4925 4 жыл бұрын

It’s never been like that for me I’m mixed ... half black/half white and while my sister has had this experience I haven’t I’ve been rejected by this community and always called “to white” to be around

@Jojo-qg8vv 4 жыл бұрын

@@absolutelyjolly4925 Same, my family was spit on, you're only included if you erase your "white" side or demean any whites close by...

@MsYBBG 4 жыл бұрын

Sade How are you pushed out of the black community? You look as phenotypically black as I do and I have two black parents.

@gigglypuff3589 4 жыл бұрын

49jubilee as an Indian, I agree

@sundancer7562 4 жыл бұрын

Love when you talk about your experiences as a woman of guyenese descent. Most Indians aren't educated about the VAST indian diaspora, including our indo-carribean fam.

@KD-dr3gy 4 жыл бұрын

I nannied for a lady that was Guyanese and grew up in Sierra Lione. I'm west african and so she liked to talk about that a lot with me. I remember being so confused haha. She was wonderful!

@serenajasmine10 4 жыл бұрын

Osito Kintsugi i am 🇬🇾🇳🇬 too, im seeing a lot more people with mixed culture!

@therealempress5707 4 жыл бұрын

I like having g friends who are different than me. Makes life more interesting.

@_Alimm 4 жыл бұрын

I really hope a lot of mixed girls and women see this.

@getwithlu 4 жыл бұрын

GirlYouAlreadyKnow FACTS ON FACTS

@iloveplatano 4 жыл бұрын

Present

@KabbalahSherry 4 жыл бұрын

Was FLOORED & ecstatic to see this! 🤗💖💯

@naturallymemarie9650 4 жыл бұрын

This was a great video. Would it be possible to do a part 2 with Jared describing his experiences as a mixed person? I look forward to all of your videos.

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

Yeah Jared has a VERY different experience than me because his dad raised him to see the world through the lens of a black man, specifically an American black man. Whereas I was raised through the lens of being mixed.

@playablue 4 жыл бұрын

I see that”Shane boody” deleted my message from before so here it goes again. LISTEN UP! Shane is an opportunist. She is a light skinned person that doesn’t talk about what blackish and mixedish shows do like deflect RACISM OPPRESSION and SUPPRESSION . Blackish show was ALREADY a mixed based show subliminally because all the children except one was completely biracial so how is that a “black” show? (Y’all know these is facts) More to the fact that now that blackish is “accepted” from mainstream society (mostly white folk and nice portion of black folk makes it even worse since most black people dont live like that its fake and not based on real reality) makes it easier to apply a show like “mixedish” when in fact there is already a show like that on television. Mixed show was put forth to make us beleive the 980’s were better than what they were with crack breaking down the black home and divided among colorism left and right. BLACK PEOPLE took in everyone that was or looked black because we are the original human Lol. The show blackish doesnt delve into the issues of dark skinned black women and their struggles like having their voice heard even here (Shane again deleted my original comment). I left a smaller similar message before on these threads and SHANE BOODY deleted them. So I am here again to voice my opinion same as Shane. She is dismissing the bigger issue. These shows like mixedish dont get at the root cause of racism being rampant of an issue now and even back then as to describing what dark skinned especially went thru yet when the show airs it will show white folk as being this awesome thing to be a part of yall seen that in the lunch room scene in the trailer. Lol White supremacy runs HOLLYWOOD and Shane I am now thinking is part of that. For a woman that loves all her and “others” opinion she certainly went thru these threads and deleted what I said earlier.. do it again Shane do it. Delete me like you tube does any youtuber that speaks their voice on this new “SLIGHT of Hand” racism thru television not telling REAL stories and the stories these shows and particularly mixedish will show how these darker people are treating them disrespectful and these white people were so awesome to ingratiate the black mind today that white people have been good.. it a lie. This show is a lie. And hollywierd has Shane too. This is all to make the WOMAN submissive to WHITE MEN... if you dont believe me look at the movies that deal with interracial relationships.. and most well be a black woman and a white man or asian man. Let alone a black man lol and a straight one .. forget about it. The end. God bless yall and I hope yall get what I wrote again!! Love freedom and freedom of speech. And her deleting my previous messages says enough on which side she is on

@melinatedvessel6840 4 жыл бұрын

@@playablue I really hope she responds.

@supernova7848 4 жыл бұрын

playablue I hope it won’t get deleted. It needs to be heard. Some ppl really do not see the bigger picture... and a lot of those pictures are sent thru mass media to impressionable young minds

@naturallymemarie9650 4 жыл бұрын

@@playablue why are you on MY post with that?

@iguessitsokyungrichbaby2813 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for speaking on how you expected black women to just “make a space and welcome you “ I noticed as a black woman people do expect me to do all the work. I notice if I don’t speak first women of other races assume I don’t “like them” when in reality if they wanted that connection or friendship so bad they should have reached out because I was not aware that was what they want. Also LOL at the airport bookstore dream 💕

@feignreigh 4 жыл бұрын

Black people are really expected to be extroverted and nice at all times or you're a meanie lolol

@chrisjamin1721 4 жыл бұрын

My father is Guyanese too but Black and mother is Trinidadian mixed (3c hair and light brown skin). My mother and grandmother describe their experience like Shan did here. Praised by black men but ostracized by black women. Not fully included to any group but only acknowledged by the black community. Interestingly, this caused them to view mixed race negatively and try to hide it. As a dark skin, black woman, I realize that our experiences are very different, when navigating though the world. However I don't feel negative toward any mixed person. All I see is my mother, a blend of privilege and pain. Race & identity politics within the 'west Indian community' are pretty complex but I hope this video helps continue a necessary conversation of empathy, knowledge and understanding.

@Dez112 4 жыл бұрын

This was absolutely beautiful. I love the way you explained this. If more people had more of an open mind to the human experience in general, vs only worrying about what skin tone or ethnicity you are before deciding whether your opinion matters, the world would be a better place.

@qtkeyah 4 жыл бұрын

How exactly were they praised by bm? And ostracized by black women? Could you give some examples?

@chrisjamin1721 4 жыл бұрын

@@qtkeyah Being frequently pursued by black men. Celebrated as a trophy of some kind with "good hair" instead of valued for intelligence regardless of career progression. Often criticized publically by black women, being made out to be promiscuous as adults for the unwanted for male attention. In the church, this can really affect your social standing.

@preddes6522 4 жыл бұрын

Complex? Shits downright toxic 😂

@preddes6522 4 жыл бұрын

@@qtkeyah colorism

@boricua584 4 жыл бұрын

In America, specifically the United States, we don’t allow mixed people to just be mixed. We force them into categories, which leds to rejection on one side or another. In places such as South Africa, mixed people are called colored. Or in other places mixed people are called Mulatto. In America, the one drop rule was implemented, and that’s how forced categorization (besides just based on phenotype occurred). It’s hard, in places like the US for people to understand the difference between race and ethnicity and even having dual or triple ethnic status’. I’m black, but identify as Afro Latina, as ethnically I am Puerto Rican. Trying to explain that growing up was a nightmare 😂 My mother has a skin color and hair like you, my father looks stereotypically black. It was confusing at times, but I think I’ve gotten in stronger in my identity by being able to use terms such as Afro Latina. I think black women fear erasure and further marginalization since racial ambiguity is in, even though our features, hairstyles, and even mannerisms are sought after. I think that is why we can appear to be more sensitive to the race issue. My mixed friend also had a similar experience at an HBCU, and again I think there’s just misconceptions on both sides that effects issues like these, which is why dialogue with open mind sets are important. As a black woman, I watch you because of how knowledgeable you are. You acknowledge racial differences, such as having that discussion on dating as a black woman, but you also don’t say hey since you’re a black woman woe is you in the dating world, it’s harder definitely but my love life has improved just by incorporating a few simple tips. I’m still working on the me part of the journey. So yes, I embrace you, love you and I consider you a sister in this journey, you come from a humble place and it’s your MIND that draws me to your videos. I think you should have more discussions on this topic, including with Jared. Always love Shan ❤️

@supernova7848 4 жыл бұрын

Mela Boricua Absolutely. The One Drop Rule was based on a fallacy and makes no biological sense whatsoever. Also Race and Ethnicity is not THAT HARD to understand!!

@theboomboomroom3268 4 жыл бұрын

Mela Boricua Apartheid in South Africa was based on Jim Crow in the US. In the 60s, when they were formulating segregation laws, The newly appointed South African minister of Apartheid Hendrik Verwoed went to America and studied US segregation and thats where they learned the term "colored". The term was not only applied to mixed race people in SA but also white males who co-habited with non-white women, and also Malaysians, Chinese and Indians (many Asians been brought in as indentured servants/slaves). Japanese on the other hand were classified as "white" because they came from an affluent country. Recently Chinese in South African won a court battle to be classified as black. So yes, under SA law a Chinese person is now black. All this just proves that race is complicated and merely a social construct.

@playablue 4 жыл бұрын

49jubilee hence that creates no cohesion among black folk because there will always be strike among them and never on the groups that did it psychologically. Hence this woman discusses it for black women yet I rarely see her comment form a male point fo view. She (this youtuber) is a mixed person yet not contributing to black women in the full like I think. It’s that fact that allows her to be popular because she court for “color” yet has none enough to speak on it in particular. It’s a shame.

@sugaspice7684 4 жыл бұрын

Honestly people always forget black latinx people! (And Latinx people mixed with black but definitely to a lesser extent) Not all latinas are white with olive/ slightly tan skin, dark eyes and dark hair, there's A LOT of black and mixed-with-black Latinx people and it really would be nice to be represented more, I'm glad people like amara la negra are getting more attention tho!

@13579hee 4 жыл бұрын

@@theboomboomroom3268 I'm happy you wrote what you wrote and I find it to be very interesting that people push this narrative that Americans, specifically African-Americans, don't understand the identities of biracial people who are half black. Most of us understand it fine, while and clear. The thing is, we the descendants of enslaved African people living in a western Nation where the racial majority is still white people. We have lived under the oppressive thumb of racism for generations and we understand how it works on institutional levels. People always mention the "One Drop Rule" to insinuate that black don't allow some biracial people to identify as biracial but everyone ignores the fact that white people implemented the "One Drop Rule to force biracial people into being considered black. African Americans accept half black people into their Community because we have watched four centuries as whiteness has continued to oppressed people of mixed ancestry who have black in them. And isn't that throughout American history Blacks forced biracial people to identify as black, white people just denied them access to whiteness and subsequently forced them to sit with the other "Negros" The difference between being a black person in a majority White nation & being ablack person who is in a majority Black or Brown Nation is that we African Americans have a full understanding of how the system of white supremacy works. I myself think biracial people should identify themselves as biracial and not take up space in the black Community by identifying solely as black. But I understand the system of White Supremacy will provide privilege to biracial people for being closer in proximity to non-black racial identities when it wants to and then turn around and call those same biracial people "Niggers" when they step out of line. This isn't true of just the white community. Non-blacks communities of color tend to suffer from antiBlackness so the same could be said of peopke who are half black half asian. I understand the Asian Community will accept them when they want to and then disown them when they dont. And for most people who are biracial and half black, a great deal of the race-based struggle they will deal with is anti-black racism

@finewine994 4 жыл бұрын

Love it! My husband is white I’m black and we’re expecting our first baby girl. And I will raise her to know she is mixed and that’s that.

@Lovingperson21 4 жыл бұрын

I don't think that was all that she was saying. I still think depending on how she looks will be important. Part of her message is how the world viewed her. And in America if she looks black that is how she will be treated. She should be taught that or she will be set up for failure.

@finewine994 4 жыл бұрын

G.N.O_KMG i get that. But I don’t want to raise my child to ignore her father gene just because America is closed minded. Teaching her that she’s just black won’t help or that she’s just white either. Teaching that she’s both will be helpful and also that she don’t have to just befriend with black or white but with anyone who respects her. No matter how much America wants to identify her based on looks she will be 50/50 and I want her to enjoy it. But I completely get what you’re saying. If she ever come and ask me I don’t have a problem explaining it to her. I just don’t want her growing up thinking she has to dismiss her dad because of ignorance( and I’ve seen that a lot with mixed ppl they’ll ignore the other parent gene just to call themselves black).

@Mel-go2pz 4 жыл бұрын

+Amanda Collins - Good for you mama! Raising a Biracial child who is proud of their biracial identity & isn't forced to choose a side but rather taught to embrace both equally is the REAL RESPECT to Black women: your image & your sisters. We can walk & chew gum at the same time so ignore all the naysayers.

@kettlylachance5696 4 жыл бұрын

Amanda Collins you will be a great mother❤️

@blackmermaid1 4 жыл бұрын

Amanda Collins good

@yoyodre 4 жыл бұрын

I hear this narrative from time to time of how mixed kids feel like they don't fit in with us, and Ive yet to know of any black community that's excluded mixed people from blackness. BUT i can provide tons of examples of mixed kids rejecting us, professionally & personally. I really appreciate you acknowledging the inclusivity of black people and identifying that black men are trained by society to view women such as yourself as a fetish, because we can't break down these ideas until we bring them to the table.

@beyonccaboyd779 4 жыл бұрын

Mario DeAndré Brooks exactly, white peoples exclude half breeds all the time, yet bi racial people want to be accepted into black spaces solely. I can’t relate to bi racial people so I have no interest in their non existent plight.

@moifikea8288 4 жыл бұрын

@@beyonccaboyd779 "non existant plight" that's just incorrect

@tiffanyr4355 4 жыл бұрын

Mario DeAndre´ Brooks, Awsome reply

@tiffanyr4355 4 жыл бұрын

@@beyonccaboyd779 like the non existent plight feel some just want attention and something to complain about because deep down most know it doesnt compare to how low/ underrated a lot of dark skin women are from everyday life to the media hate to say it like that but...hey that's why folks have to pay that foolishness no attention and don't feed into it

@ms.bubs4fun506 4 жыл бұрын

Mario DeAndre Brooks, THANK YOU! I think many mixed people tend to exasgerate so they can feel victimized too. I also have never seen a black community exclude mixed men and women. I think some mixed people refer to 1 or 2 black women that were jealous and make it seem like all black women treated them terribly. Sigh. If anything, the blacks worship their asses.

@keyaunaharris2060 4 жыл бұрын

I appreciate that you mentioned how you could have done more to help your relationship with black women. I am a black woman. I was raised in a black and Hispanic environment. When I went to college for my first year at a PWI, everyone would look to me to make them feel comfortable. I had to discuss what others wanted to talk about, be more polite than usual (otherwise I’m aggressive), and be more intellectual, because people wouldn’t take me seriously, and/or disrespect me. No one every made sure I was comfortable. My friends and I all had the same experience.

@helenlucka 4 жыл бұрын

Honestly I never knew that it was so hard to be mixed. I always thought that people got to pick what side they identified with. As a dark skinned African girl from Congo Brazzaville living in the US, I "pass" everywhere! Some people think I'm Ghanaian, Kenyan, Nigerian, Cameroonian and it's just now that I realize that it is indeed a privilege to be accepted with no questions. Thank you for sharing your experience

@24amitchell 4 жыл бұрын

Same. As a brown skin black woman i never thought about their prospectives

@soraya.e5482 4 жыл бұрын

I think people are assuming your African that's not really passing anywhere. Since , they got the race right just not the ethnicity.

@AJ-fl3pz 4 жыл бұрын

If that’s you in your avi, you don’t look Kenyan....

@xxsnxx0037 4 жыл бұрын

Bonjour my neighbor. I am from Congo Kinshasa

@playablue 4 жыл бұрын

@Jess273 4 жыл бұрын

This video is pure gold. I SO appreciate your honesty, and most of all your extremely insightful outlook on this topic. I’ve tried to have conversations about race with “mixed” with black girls many times and sadly it always fell flat because they weren’t able to see farther than “black girls were mean to me”. Most of us are battling internalized anti-blackness and self hate on the regular, which is why we prop up mixed people and claim them in our community. But it was so interesting and important to hear your articulate point of view on navigating race. I can’t thank you enough girl 💁🏾‍♀️ Also race doesn’t matter less as you get older when you’re unambiguously black. It’s an every day type of situation lol

@Jess273 4 жыл бұрын

DarthYuYevon I felt like she was honest, she didn’t get all the way into black men preferring her because of white supremacy and all that, but I thought it was implied. I appreciated about her talking about her experience in general

@fabiolasully7920 4 жыл бұрын

@Jess273 4 жыл бұрын

DarthYuYevon lol I agree! She’s gorgeous, I just mean the overly propping up of mixed women in general in the black community is in large part due to white supremacy

@thefuture3376 4 жыл бұрын

Jessica K so where was the white supremacy when the moors were intermixing way before slavery ????? Check your facts and your history before you just agree with anyone on KZbin just because it sounds kool don’t mean it’s true..and the girl that made the video isn’t even 100% black and 100% white she’s more black and Indian so chill your pants she don’t speak for us genuine mixed race people.

@Jess273 4 жыл бұрын

The Future Dude chill lol Of course white supremacy is not the sole reason for race mixing, no one said that. I’m talking about the reason why some black people overly prefer non black or mixed race people, thinking non black features are more attractive. That can of course be traced to white supremacy

@sammierose1150 4 жыл бұрын

When she said she was never anyone’s first choice - girl... I FELT THAT SH*T 😔. I had the exact same elementary school experience as her, but in the U.S. The amount of “otherness” that you feel, when you show up to school and one of your parents looks like all the other kids, but the other one doesn’t - chiiild, I could go on and on, but I won’t. All I’ll say, is that as a fellow racially ambiguous person, I confirm and concur with her experience. 😤

@PurpleHairOMG04 4 жыл бұрын

I’ve friends that I’ve known since kindergarten ask me in high school who the “white guy” with me all the time is (MY FATHER🙄).

@PurpleHairOMG04 4 жыл бұрын

ketsia cherilus never said I was wasting time dwelling on it but after 15+ years you’d think people would be able to finish the equation. As you said though, my family is definitely not the norm and I’m realizing that more and more as the years go by

@kettlylachance5696 4 жыл бұрын

Amber P 🤣🤣🤣😩

@PurpleHairOMG04 4 жыл бұрын

Amanda Bernice yes! Once you get older you start to realize that more people live in mixed families, even if you can’t tell from an initial glance. I look at my nieces and nephews today and it’s so wild how many mixed children there are compared to even a decade ago and how representation is growing in the toys and media that’s out there for kids to see themselves in. Their experience as mixed kids is going to be so different!

@KabbalahSherry 4 жыл бұрын

Yup, yup & YUP to allll of this comment 😕💯

@DeeDeeWednesday 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for acknowledging the space that Black women provide for our mixed and biracial kin. Often times we are only depicted as jealous or mean, specifically towards mixed and biracial women. I hope that you define your own space wherever you please; but as long as there is genuine love and respect for Black women there will always be that space.

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

Beautifully said DeeDee

@DeeDeeWednesday 4 жыл бұрын

Shan BOODY thank you💕

@tonkanakic1421 4 жыл бұрын

I often see that you Americans have this weird assumption that Portuguese and Spanish people are not “white”. Portuguese are white.. Portugal is one of the biggest European colonial powers in history. 8:18

@ANTPHRESSH89 4 жыл бұрын

Yes Spanish is White. Portuguese is white. I agree @Tonka Nakic You speak the truth

@MiZzThANGz21 4 жыл бұрын

Yes! It’s so weird ppl think otherwise. European= white. Americans seem to think Italians aren’t white either. I think it’s the conditioning of the media; ie blonde hair + light colored skin = only the white “type” that exists. Lol

@yvettechinsee63 4 жыл бұрын

Colonial power yes. We know that all too well.

@mosestoliver4068 4 жыл бұрын

Tonka Nakić I’ve been saying that forever

@etf42 4 жыл бұрын

1) In America, Portuguese and Spanish are colloquially used for people from South and Central America 2) Portugal and Spain have significant historical admixture with the Moors, which distinguishes them from the rest of Europe (darker hair, olive skin, etc) and is why they are often not viewed as white

@stephaniesingroy 4 жыл бұрын

As a Guyanese woman, I feel this sooo much! I am mixed as you are, and never really know what to tell people. You should read "Coolie Woman" love you, stay strong!

@amazinggracie8251 4 жыл бұрын

In my school in the 90s I never really saw what I saw on the show. The mixed kids usually hung out with black people. I never heard or saw any bullying. Black kids at my school saw the mixed kids as black. They thought it was cool to be mixed not weird. And there was a good amount of IR relationships between black and white even black girls were dating white.

@lajeanmaker3271 4 жыл бұрын

Rare but beautiful

@amazinggracie8251 4 жыл бұрын

@@lajeanmaker3271 not really at least not in some diverse areas. My school and area was pretty diverse, black white hispanic, indian, there wasnt a whole lot of IR but it wasnt rare.

@qtkeyah 4 жыл бұрын

Relatable. I grew up in Toronto like Shannon and being mixed was seen as desirable. People who weren't mixed would search for anything non black in their family tree just to claim it...

@playablue 4 жыл бұрын

Keyah G thats because white folk love that melanin just not that african mindset. They want that roar out of the body and just left with the body. It a Sad situation.

@BlackGirlLovesAnime6 4 жыл бұрын

I'm from Baltimore and growing up I would claim anyone with a hint of black as black and we all have. But now that I'm older I see how detrimental it is to do that. I'm glad you can be honest about your experience as a mixed race person, good and bad

@BlackGirlLovesAnime6 4 жыл бұрын

@Ella Hendrix calling them what they are is very important for their identity and for the black community. We have enough problems and colorism/featurism is a big one

@BlackGirlLovesAnime6 4 жыл бұрын

@Ella Hendrix I am not fighting with you. It's been proven that colorism and featurism are real and all the bullshit "we're all mixed" excuses people like you love to use are invalid. If you dont want to acknowledge those issues stay out of the conversation. And if you arent even black or let alone mixed/biracial stfu

@thefuture3376 4 жыл бұрын

Ella Hendrix no because your dna can be blackened and whitened to the point you are fully black or mixed so no your not genuinely mixed like 100% black and 100% white. And that’s what this topic is on mixed race people 50/50 at the exact time of conception

@lakeside321 4 жыл бұрын

Don’t speak for us , we can speak for ourselves.

@msscorpio170 4 жыл бұрын

@@lakeside321 you mad lmaooo CHILL! What disrespect was said???

@elevatedlife3884 4 жыл бұрын

I NEED you to know that every time I watch your videos, I rewatch it multiple times. You are beautifully articulate, ingenious, and spot on with the content that you've been producing. Thank you, especially for this video but for all of them. You are wonderful :) I'm also downloading your book on audible.

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

Nichole just wow!

@tomreed5230 4 жыл бұрын

I agree....

@quianaj2132 4 жыл бұрын

I don't think race necessarily becomes less important as you age when you're a person of colour, especially when you live in white, westernised societies. And yeah, in many ways that is a privileged statement. But rather, I think your relationship with cultivating racial identity becomes less important, it's paramount during childhood and teenage development. Blackness will always be important when navigating the modern world, but my understanding of my race, my relationship with my black womanhood, my understanding of how my race is viewed in the world has now been solidified. I don't mean to speak for you, but I think this would maybe be a more true statement for you. Because I've also heard you say that you've come to accept that various people will racialise you how they want. Anyways, much love, thank you for everything you do, you enrich my life in so many ways!

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

beautifully said, thanks for this Quiana

@DorothyDandridge 4 жыл бұрын

“The Black community has carved out such a beautiful door for mixed people to feel welcome..to feel a part of...they have made a beautiful sense of belonging (for mixed-black) people” - Shan 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽💯

@lakeside321 4 жыл бұрын

The black race has done that to their own detriment. Locking themselves out of opportunities for a less black esthetic.

@alextroy9202 4 жыл бұрын

DorothyDandridge and that’s the problem

@babyxkande 4 жыл бұрын

I find that identity politics is very different between black African-Americans, Africans, Afro-Caribbeans, etc, etc because they each have such a nuanced perspective of a similar history. To be honest, as a Jamaican, I never thought about race as a straight line between black and white until I came to Canada. It was normal for me to know people that were racially ambiguous or "coolie". I find that this is the case all over the Carribean because the population has been historically "mixed". But I enjoyed hearing your perspective about this

@itsbellebellebitchcosmetics 4 жыл бұрын

My professor used to say about being mixed: you are not made of parts, you are 100% _______ and 100% _________ being mixed doesn’t take away your wholeness

@Tullahgit 4 жыл бұрын

Isabella Jay That makes no sense at all.

@IBBMS 4 жыл бұрын

Well your professor doesn’t know what they’re talking about because that makes no sense. That’s like saying you’re not half of your mom and half of your dad you’re 100% each....no, they’re not.

@supernova7848 4 жыл бұрын

Your professor need to revise biology class and take a crash course in genetics 🧬

@grayonthewater 4 жыл бұрын

Three people really don’t get it

@stanfatou2002 4 жыл бұрын

@@grayonthewater this was honestly stupid tho. You arent a whole of anything.lmao 2 races can't make one full unhybred race dude

@tarynmarie9066 4 жыл бұрын

I just love you. I love that you’re opening up this conversation. I’m a mixed woman. Half Mexican Half White. My mom (Mexican) was a single mom. I have always felt very “othered” as you say because I don’t look Mexican. I’m very fair, I have freckles, and blue eyes. I do have my mother’s hair (dark brown, very curly 3C hair). I’ve always been assumed to be white. My last name was a districts Mexican name and I was always met with confusion. When someone would meet my mom or we’d be seen together I’d be asked if I was adopted. My mother was even stopped at the border (this was back in the day when you could walk across) because the border patrol thought she was using me to get into American because we look nothing alike. However, I’ve always admired my mother. I’ve always wanted to be like her. And it saddens me to say that she would tell me all the time how lucky I was because I looked white. So I’m 30 now, I embrace being mixed, and I’m the first to point out that I’m a mixed or bi-racial woman. But white people always think I’m lying and Mexicans look at me like I can never be one of them because I don’t have their experience. And they’re right. I don’t. So I’ve definitely felt alone. And who has been so kind to me? Black women. Lol they push me to embrace being a biracial woman. They encourage me to share my story and educate people. And I’ve never been so appreciative then when a white woman asked me in a bookstore where I got my perm and a lovely and amazing black woman laughed and said “honey that isn’t a perm, that’s natural. What are you baby?” And when I said I half Mexican and white she complimented me on my hair. It felt great just to have someone not challenge me for having a piece of something that was different.

@earthangel713 4 жыл бұрын

Taryn Harbert I didn’t have the same experience as you, but I totally relate to not feeling Mexican enough. My dad is Indigenous Mexican & my mother is Afro-Cuban/Mexican, but has smaller eyes & very tight curls so everyone usually thinks she’s black and Asian. I wasn’t raised speaking Spanish and in school it felt like the Mexican kids would think I was Asian while everyone else would think I was Mexican. & I was more artsy and into indie music & skateboarding & just all around pretty different from my peers because my parents grew up in the 80s and my dad was a skater who grew up in a predominately black neighborhood and they were part of the New Wave scene listening to bands like The Smiths & The Cure & also a lot of hip-hop & R&B. So I didn’t grow up listening to Classic Mexican Music but my grandpa played a lot of Salsa which i fkn loveee!! Lol I was lucky enough to find a group of outcast that were of multiple races that I fit into. I love my Mexican heritage & Cuban heritage & just because we didn’t grow up like the typical Mexican American doesn’t take away who we are & our love for our people!! I have dark 3A/B hair & the most sweetest comments I’ve gotten about my hair have been from black women, I don’t think a Mexican Woman has ever complimented my hair which probably isn’t true for everyone, but I feel you gurl!!

@oldaccount8478 4 жыл бұрын

Mexican isn’t really a race. But I get what you’re saying.

@tarynmarie9066 4 жыл бұрын

Old account yes it is... Mexican is a race lol.

@oldaccount8478 4 жыл бұрын

Taryn Harbert it isn’t. It’s an ethnicity. I’m a mestiza. Half native and half white. Thats what the majority of Mexicans identify as their race.

@amaliab6682 4 жыл бұрын

@@tarynmarie9066 There are straight up white Mexicans that are fully descended from white Spaniards + other Europeans like Germans, Italians, etc. So no, Mexican is not a race or one singular experience. That's like saying that "American" or "Canadian" is a race. The people descended from the colonizers who forced their language and religion onto indigenous peoples don't have the same experiences as predominantly non-white people, and I have met PLENTY of white Mexicans (and white Latinos in general for that matter) who like to claim they're not white because "uh my dad says he has some native ancestry on his grandma's side" lol like yeah. Every white Latino claims to have some vague, possibly native great-grandmother and I take them just as seriously as all the white Americans who talk about their Cherokee great-grandmother. Even if they are like 1/16th native they still have the privileges of a white person and they are treated as white people, because that's basically just what they are. White and predominantly white Latinos will ALWAYS want to play the "we're all mixed, we're all the same, we all have it the same" game because that allows them to avoid facing the reality and the responsibility for the fact that they make up the privileged upper classes, and they are the ones oppressing native Latinos and Afro-Latinos and benefiting from the systemic oppression brown and black Latinos face. This is another huge problem that needs to be addressed, not just swept under the rug because it's an uncomfortable conversation to have. The sheer amount of uneducated people who will deny this is astounding, I've literally come across blatantly white, blue eyed, red haired Latinos who deny they're white, it's completely ridiculous. And white people with brown hair & eyes are still white, just because they're two shades darker than Scandinavians doesn't mean they're not white. Spaniards are white Europeans and so are their descendants.

@mixedmamiiD 4 жыл бұрын

I don't speak on black issues because I'm mixed. I have thoughts or feelings and empathy but you won't get me caught up in comparative pain. You have yours and I have mine.

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

YUP! You have yours and I have mine is CORRECT

@nafahadfarrahjama8777 4 жыл бұрын

That makes no sense at all there is no such thing as black issues! Injustice is wrong and everyone should stand against it! In the end of the day you will be looked at as black for me I don’t know what mixed is I only see black because black genes are strong 💪🏽

@Smileyshanice 4 жыл бұрын

@@nafahadfarrahjama8777 no

@tylerdavidson2400 4 жыл бұрын

Roots Most black people in America has non-black ancestry.

@preciousgugzikgomo7060 4 жыл бұрын

@Roots Is this due to the fact that mixed people of that time felt compelled to fight for the black community or is it because as black people our self-loathing runs so deep that felt we'd get the best response if represnted by people who have a tinge of "non-black". I'm honestly just asking I know nothing about this history. Im asking tho because to this day (although it's changing) mixed people are chosen above the stereotypical black phenotype to represent black people, even in TV shows & movies.

@stylecauldron 4 жыл бұрын

I’m mixed, mom is Filipino, dad is black and I was raised by my mom and her family so culturally I always felt more Filipino. Since high school I have always felt so uncomfortable when it came to black men looking at me because I have an “exotic” look. I feel appreciative to black women that don’t see me as a threat and just as another woman of color. It’s also strange when people respond “that’s a really beautiful mix” when then ask what I am. I think all kinds of mixes are beautiful. Do other mixes get this response too? I hope so because it’s awkward being put on this racial ambiguous pedestal I didn’t ask for

@bishoujo97 4 жыл бұрын

littlecrowley same! I feel this post as another fellow Blasian

@itskeke-wk8ng 4 жыл бұрын

littlecrowley yeah, my mother is white English and father black Caribbean (Jamaican Cuban ). Every time i meet somebody new they always ask 'where I am from' which is annoying because I am from the UK. I don't see myself to have any links to my ethnicity more than it being in my genes etc as I grew up in the UK around British culture. People make such a big deal out of my skin colour but when I look in the mirror I just see me, I think it's a shame how it's uplifted so much especially by black men.

@ReaperCet 4 жыл бұрын

It's definitely awkward. I feel like women are just as likely to put their mixed status on a pedestal as men are. You'll see a lady's profile, and the first bit of info you see is what she's mixed with. I think it's weird to use the same language that you would use to describe a dog. 😂 People are people, beautiful is beautiful. I like to just leave it at that.

@gerryo25 4 жыл бұрын

They say that's a good mix because in the black community being of mixed race is highly valued as opposed to being full black. Even if you have different ethnic backgrounds but both parents are black it's seen as more favorable to others. I'm Nigerian and Guyanese and people are like that's a great mix. I'm like a mix of what? I'm still black and nothing more.

@unabashed 4 жыл бұрын

Yes the "beautiful mix" comments come about from any mixture that takes away from one's blackness...people praise the dilution of blackness and uplift it as more desirable.

@OriginalMaster16 4 жыл бұрын

Thanks for this video Shannon! Biologically I am multigenerationally admixed. My parents being from the Dominican Republic. I identify as black. Ever since the 7th grade when I moved to Miami and was in a over 90% black middle school, everybody in school identified me as black. Nobody ever assumed I was “Hispanic”. Not even “Hispanic” people saw me as “Hispanic”. At that age I didn’t know Hispanic wasn’t a race. I had a hard time understanding this because race wasn’t spoken about in my home as a kid. So all I knew was that I was Dominican. To me THAT was my race. So people seeing me as black was a culture shock to me. had to educate myself on the history of the island and I slowly began to accept what people saw me as and that they were correct to view me as black. This acceptance wasn’t an over night thing. My high school was also 90% black students. I had identity issues in high school and self hate issues. It wasn’t until after high school that I began to love my identity and hair texture and accepting of myself as a black man. Which is part of the reason I decided to grow my hair out at 19. I love when people assume or see me as what I am which is BLACK. People assume I’m Jamaican, Haitian, American black, and yes I also get American biracial. And it’s only online that you see the “ if you are mixed you ain’t black”. In REAL LIFE no one. And I mean no one sees me as anything but black!

@thatsvickiIRL 4 жыл бұрын

what a contrast from my experience in Miami - for whatever reason ppl thought I was hispanic - Dominican specifically. I am Jamaican Asian.

@craftingwithnetta7950 4 жыл бұрын

True! That is only online

@OriginalMaster16 4 жыл бұрын

Thats Vicki I honestly didn’t understand it as a child. I was born in NYC and grew up in Washington heights until the age of 12 when i moved to Miami. In NYC, my classroom was mostly Dominicans, a few Puerto ricans and a couple of other nationalities like Mexicans, Peruvian, and a couple of Pakistani kids, and one Russian. Most of my classmates were around my complexion. I only ever had one African American classmate and that was in the 4th grade. Her name was Charisma. Race wasn’t talked about in class, or with my neighborhood friends. We were all Dominicans and or Hispanic. In contrast when I moved to Miami in the 7th grade. In a class of 30 kids, only 3 are my complexion and the rest are black and dark skinned from Haiti, Jamaica, Bahamas, Virgin Islands. It was a strong contrast from what I came from in NYC. And here is where people began saying to me that I am black. Not even asking me. They just knew. Also in Miami we had PE outside so my pale ass got a tan real fast so I was several shades darker than I am now as an adult. But they saw what I didn’t see in me at that time which is my African heritage and ancestry in my physical appearance. I am so glad they were my mirror into who I really was. I can’t imagine who I would have been today If I never was exposed to that!

@OriginalMaster16 4 жыл бұрын

Crafting with Netta yup!!! I never get that energy in real life!

@thatsvickiIRL 4 жыл бұрын

@@OriginalMaster16 grew up in JA until I was 15 so moving here was interesting. My HS was mostly white and automatically I went to seek out ppl that I was accustomed to being around. The small percentage of black students were bussed to the school and long story short I was deemed the uppity black girl or the coconut. It got worse when my asian mom showed up to PT night. I was no longer even considered a part of anything at that point. I think there was like 4 asians in the whole school and they were filipino and ironically hung out with the black kids. I did have a few friends - Puerto Rican, Mexican, Dominican and Nicaraguan. As a side note, my life in the US was around my Asian family so culturally that is how I grew up and that is yet another story. Being mix-ish has its unique struggles.

@ANTPHRESSH89 4 жыл бұрын

I love how open and honest you are. You really never said anything wrong. Your individual experience is unique. YOU need to be not beat up on yourself.

@tink0301 4 жыл бұрын

I think it is very important that we understand all experiences within the mixed community are extremely varied. I'm happy that the black community embraced u so much but for me I was othered on all sides growing up

@nesbu5195 4 жыл бұрын

She said she was othered though, she just grew and gained another perspective.

@KryxtianBlack 4 жыл бұрын

@@nesbu5195 exactly. Ppl still "othering" her by assuming she's being dishonest... Lol

@KryxtianBlack 4 жыл бұрын

@@nesbu5195 it's okay to grow and gain another perspective lol

@kaliegates6973 4 жыл бұрын

I was younger and made one little mistakes people my own race would get mad and called me a white girl and I cried because it was still hard for me to identify myself at the time. People still questions sometimes, but not as much as it used to be questioned. It wasn't just grade school, it was high school as well.

@DH-uw3us 4 жыл бұрын

@DarthYuYevon Did you not hear the part about her experiences at the HBCU? She was "othered" by Blacks and whites.

@bjelissia 4 жыл бұрын

As a black woman, I feel like some black women compare ourselves to the “other” when we should just embrace ourselves and our beauty. But it is out of fear of not being beautiful enough when we are enough just as God made us. Some of us fear not being chosen by men we see when we should just love ourselves. As a woman, I feel like a lot of women do not stick together and uplift each other like we should and it’s sad. I have always interacted with mixed people and although I do not truly understand where they are coming from. I have an understanding of how they are perceived and what they go through. I don’t feel like it’s right to make them feel any different because at the end of the day, they are just people too. I have always made an effort to make everyone feel inclusive because I know how it feels to be secluded from the group.

@8806Erika 4 жыл бұрын

And ultimately, mixed or not, if they identify as black through the identity of their black parents and how they were brought up and raised in black culture we should acknowledge and accept that. If they identify as white (Stacy Dash) we should accept that as well.

@breezeeasy1064 4 жыл бұрын

If you're a mom to biracial children like myself, get to see a different perspective

@breezeeasy1064 4 жыл бұрын

@@8806Erika I don't think it's fair to black people for biracials to identify as just black because then blacks will be pushed to the back, it's erasure. That's why whites, Asians and other races don't allow it. I think black parents who have biracial children should teach their children to identify with both sides, if they wanted fully black children should've had children with a black partner. It would be disrespectful for me to raise my biracial children as black, and we know many cases both blacks and whites will elevate biracials over fully black people and replace fully black people with biracials in terms of representations. No I'm sorry biracials should have their own spaces. No Chinese person would let a blackanese represent them, so idk why black people allow this, we are TOO inclusive

@breezeeasy1064 4 жыл бұрын

@@8806Erika When you really think about it, if a biracial only claims one side of their heritage that's a form of self hate. If they are ashamed of one side that is disrespectful to one parent and also means that biracial person isn't fully accepting themselves which is self hate

@8806Erika 4 жыл бұрын

@@breezeeasy1064 not necessarily. There are a lot of reasons a person may only IDENTIFY with one race or another but culture, race and ethnicity are all different things. For example. A person that considers themself a Biracial Black Woman is identifying that they are biracial (racially) but because they grew up in black culture considers themself biracial BLACK. That's not self hating automatically. That is the culture they choose to identify with and that's their choice and none of us have the right to tell someone else who they are etc. I do consider Stacy Dash self hating though, not because she biracial and choosing to identify as white, but because of her problematic behavior and views (not to mention neither of her parents are white lol)...not because she identifies as white. My children's father is biracial and doesn't identify with being black (has a Hispanic mother and never had a relationship with his black father) although he acknowledges his biracial heritage he identifies moreso with Hispanic culture because of how he was raised.

@happymama2793 4 жыл бұрын

Being seen for your gifts is amazing, but first you should be seen as a person. And I'm so sorry that people that I share the same race with fell short of that. You are an amazing, lovely, kind, and talented woman. Truly an inspiration to everymind you meet.

@Jellybean446 4 жыл бұрын

I am also mixed black and indian (my mom is from India and my dad is black american) and I completely agree that the black community has been the only one to embrace me fully. Often south asians (even my own family) have been outwardly anti black towards me but I know I can always count of black women to make me feel loved and supported

@fe6523 4 жыл бұрын

That has to do with your Indian culture. In your culture there is a problem with Indians marrying one another if there not the same caste system. Your mix is very rare I do not see to often a black and Indian couple.!! I am half African American and Moroccan and that's very rare to see that mix combination too!!! Mines is even more complex and could be really deceiving if you did not know the history and people well. Only thing I can say there is so many different unique ways to be mix!! I only can say enjoy and embrace both side of your heritage because IT ALL makes you!!!

@KD-dr3gy 4 жыл бұрын

@@fe6523 so you're literally African American. Like me. Though I'm born in america to west African parents. I find the term African American annoying but I am quite literally African and American. You too are part black American part black African. I found it interesting you said half "African" American half morrocan. I know some Morro ans do not veiw themselves as black but more Berber or mixed.

@fe6523 4 жыл бұрын

@@KD-dr3gy My father is African American typical African American family who'S family been in America since the 1600's/ 1700's African American . My family in morroco are Moroccan MULTI RACIALnorth africans mix of berber, Arab, Spanish, jew, Italian, Sub saharan African as well. Some north Africans are mainly berber and some are multi racial mix like my family. That's what came back in my DNA test.My family has the dark,/tan and light/ white. The phenotype of both side of my family even thow both are under the african diaspora is different even with some of my family with darker skin. NOT trying to disregard any part of my heritage but stating the FACT..

@DH-uw3us 4 жыл бұрын

@@fe6523 After reading this I was literally thinking about how it is extremely rare and almost unheard of for Black and Indian to mix. That's a combination you never see and its sad that people are so close-minded that its so frowned upon. If two people want to be together it shouldn't matter their background.

@fe6523 4 жыл бұрын

@@DH-uw3us your correct Diana!! I know people want to point the finger at white people but people of color with melanin in there skin in ALL races really need to take a hard look at themselves!! I travel all the time and notice even on planes i am constantly on people with melanin in there skin in ALL races do not really enage in conversation with other races with melanin in there skin for the most part. Like for example a indian person sitting next to and talking to a african American person and vice versa or east Asian person sitting and talking to a hispanic person and vice versa or middle eastern person sitting and talking to a native american person or sub saharan african person from Africa and vice versa but all these races have no problem with talking to white people. I am sure its different in New york city but you should not have to live and travel to New york to see true GENUINE diversity of dialogue among the human race. We as human beings have a long ways to go in having basic dialogue, lucky dating/ marrying each other of different races and being excepting of other races outside of white. Please KZbin SGI Buddhist movement an introduction FULL LENGTH version. Google www.sgi-usa.org, have a wonderful day!! Peace!!

@TransformwithTayani 4 жыл бұрын

I’m a mom of a mixed child. My spouse is Asian and Spaniard. I’m black. Our baby came out very light with blonde hair. My spouse and I always talked about how he would fit in being mixed or perceived. My spouse didn’t fit in nor identify with most groups growing up. I like hearing your perspective and your experience. Thank You.

@Idanimowellness 4 жыл бұрын

I’m so glad you understand how black men have been conditioned. I love black men but they are the only group of people in the world that can’t see the beauty in their own women. And I’m speaking generally. Yes they are black men that aren’t like that but the amount of anti-black women black men is disheartening. And I’m from Baltimore. So I’m sorry 😂 no shade, but coppin is not the place to have an intellectual conversation regarding race 🤷🏽‍♀️ of course you couldn’t have known that though. So sorry you had that experience. If I would’ve seen you, I would’ve just thought you were black and white and kept it pushing . You don’t have to choose. You’re just two things at once. I truly appreciate you for shouting out black women. We’re often viewed as haters but what it really is is our fear of erasure.

@iamthady 4 жыл бұрын

Anae O'Neal black American*

@Idanimowellness 4 жыл бұрын

Tadey a true lol

@davidjones4934 4 жыл бұрын

Unless you're legally bond to another person you're not anyone's "women"

@blackmermaid1 4 жыл бұрын

Anae O'Neal because black people are too oppressed. Just like bw can't see Beauty in their own hair 🤷🏾‍♀️

@KadanzaD 4 жыл бұрын

@@blackmermaid1 black women have been conditioned by society not to see our hair as beautiful. That's important to note.

@TheCrazyCupcakeKid 4 жыл бұрын

I'm from the UK and for the most part I'd say being mixed race is accepted. I'm half Chinese and half Grenadian (Caribbean) and there have only been a couple occasions where people have asked me to pick sides (which I find absurd because I'm both). Also because nationality and ethnicity are seen as separate things I can be simultaneously mixed raced but also British (as I was born and raised here). Though in saying that because being black and Asian is rare I am missed out on census forms, as it only accounts for mixed raced people who are white mixed with black Carribean, black African or Asian.

@Anna133199 4 жыл бұрын

I thought the census forms with race were strictly an American thing. I'm half-Ghanaian, half-Dutch in the Netherlands and I've never had to fill in my "race". Just the country each of my parents are from, occasionally.

@tionne395 4 жыл бұрын

Anna133199 you don’t necessarily have to fill in your ‘race’, they just ask your ethnicity and nationality. So that they can use it for data and statistics.

@icilmaa 4 жыл бұрын

So you're half black because I know that in Grenada like much of the Caribbean there's not just black people living or born there.

@pinkdes2ny 4 жыл бұрын

I am what you would call the classic mixed, black mom and white dad. I was born in the 70s and grew up in the 80s and 90s. I agree with Rainbow's aloneness in the episode. I was one of the only 2 mixed kids in my elementary school, the other one was my older sister. That also held up for junior high as well. I didn't go to school with other mixed kids until high school and there were probably less than 10 of us. Also, I grew up in Mississippi so that's a whole other layer of foolishness. I grew up in the era where being mixed was not common and got the "what are you?" question weekly. That actually continued until I was about 25. I've never been accepted in white society as a white girl but have always been accepted as a black woman and by mostly open arms by black society. Colorism is strong in the south and attention from men because of my mixed status was also an issue I dealt with. Yet, there was and at times still is a feeling of never having two feet in the same place and I truly don't think that will ever change for those of us that have two or more cultures and races to live between.

@lukasbondevik6866 4 жыл бұрын

Ah yes, the "what are you" question. Got that a lot growing up. Also a lot of people asking if my father or my mother was my birth parent.

@vibesthatheal 4 жыл бұрын

I notice it’s more about skin tone in the black community. I have two black parents but I got the mixed experience growing up. Light skin black people are a minority in the black community so we tend to be lumped in with mixed people sometimes which can cause an identity crisis because we have 2 black parents but we treated like one of our parents are non black 😕

@tdr.220 4 жыл бұрын

I agree with you Vibes That Heal. That's why the show "Mixed-ish" is kinda problematic for me because although a person may not consider themselves to be biracial if they have a mixed phenotype they could have had many of the same experiences as a "mixed" kid growing up. I think it should focus more on culture instead of race because there is variety in physical traits for every diaspora. The one-drop rule is stupid, and I think people should identify with their cultural experiences over race, because in the States, not very many Blacks are pure African-by that logic, everyone is "Mixed" but may not be treated as such. While I respect that the show will highlight the experiences of mixed-race people, I also feel like it will force lighter-skinned blacks to now define themselves as "Mixed" based on phenotype rather than cultural experience.

@pearlsrevealed 4 жыл бұрын

@Jessica X Location matters. In Louisiana she is a regular black girl. In Colorado others may presume she is mixed.

@Woowooox3 4 жыл бұрын

Promise EDEN colorism is the discrimination of darker skin. Not lighter skin. Please keep that in mind....

@Woowooox3 4 жыл бұрын

Jessica X nope... please look up the definition of colorism. Darker skin people of black, asian, etc are targeted by colorism.

@Woowooox3 4 жыл бұрын

Jessica X you gave the definition of discrimination not colorism. Colorism is about the discrimination of darker skin tone while lighter skin tones benefit. You thought you really did something lmao

@melodyperez6058 4 жыл бұрын

When u spoke on comparative pain. I so get that. Back in college, I would get people angry with me for talking about marginalization I've faced and lower or demean it because I'm Latino and "not dark enough to understand." Ok yeah but that doesn't erase the years or racism I faced growing up in the south as a Mexican. We can't keep fightingng each other, we need to understand one another's pain.

@bspoon2529 4 жыл бұрын

Melody Perez well i agree but all ethnicities have faced different kinds of pain or challenges and they are effected by it differently... for many some believe some pain and experiences are exclusively theres so if someone that has a different background than them express a similar pain they feel like you are dismissing my pain or they can’t see because they are blinded by hate... because tbh many of us are turning into the very thing that we hate... with that being said im sorry that folks that look like me made you feel that way we all have to fight against the devil the REAL devil not the human manifestations

@Boots_Alexander 4 жыл бұрын

I don't think the anger is to minimalize YOUR pain or experience. In THAT moment, its NOT about you. Playing the oppression Olympics is like when people say "all lives matter". Could you image for example if you told someone that your loved one was dying of BREAST cancer and their response was no.....ALL CANCERS matter. Of course everyone's feelings are important but compassion goes a long way.

@melodyperez6058 4 жыл бұрын

@@bspoon2529 that makes a lot of sense. It's nice as a society though that we're having conversations to better understand one another. I think that's important :)

@melodyperez6058 4 жыл бұрын

@@Boots_Alexander but as minority myself I've never used my own pains as a way to diminish someone else. That's not fun for anyone and I feel most ppl of color understand that. It's more like if I wanted to join the conversation by saying "i too have experienced that pain", i would get turned away with dismissive comments because i don't meet a certain standard in that persons head or whatever to be a " person of color". And that's for multiple reasons, not just skin tone alone. in itself its a hurtful feeling because your in this middle place where no matter where u turn to in anyone conversation, your feelings are automatically invalid.

@bspoon2529 4 жыл бұрын

Melody Perez i see your point and for some humans they need to fit in or love to share things i for one don’t need that i say that to say we are all different and we cannot expect all to feel the way we feel on the matter... that is why empathy is needed to try to understand the other persons perspective than always trying to validate our perspective... the more we understand about people that don’t have our views the more at peace we can be and the more well rounded not to mention we will have a better sense of self meaning we don’t need validation

@darylifillifill1677 4 жыл бұрын

As a Black Man with Cerebral Palsy on my right side Family and Society can treat you as other

@aboutthat1440 4 жыл бұрын

I see you on so many of the same videos I watch. It's literally like you are my twin. The only videos I don't see you on are the Islamic ones I go to.

@darylifillifill1677 4 жыл бұрын

Cool

@BluEx22329 4 жыл бұрын

youre in every comment section

@weirdocentric23 4 жыл бұрын

🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾as always thank you for opening up dialogue amongst people every. I had the opposite experience being a darker skin woman raised in the Caribbean where people where more proud of their mixed heritage and had more opportunities. I was made to feel other by them and on the flip side I was made to feel other by the black community because of my curl pattern and features. The only community that couldn’t care less was the Europeans. I still embrace all of my cultures and mixes, people just need to have more conversations like this. Ps Jared’s music is 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🙌🏾

@TheLiaBird 4 жыл бұрын

But I really don’t fit in on either side. I’m too black for white people people to see me as one them and too white for black people to see me as one them. Black women (SPECIFICALLY) have been the most gracious and understanding and accepting of me- but I’m still not black because I didn’t “grow up black”. And that’s okay!! It used to bother me, but now I feel like I’m seen more as an individual and for my character since I don’t fit squarely into any racial stereotypes (a massive, massive privilege). I have so much love, support, and respect for the black community. And I’m so thankful for the space they’ve created for people like me. I feel the most comfortable surrounded by black folks and people of color. But just because they gave me a key to the house doesn’t mean I live there and doesn’t mean I can move however I want!

@BooDotBoo 4 жыл бұрын

Let me tell you, I didn't "grow up black" and I'm black, lol. I just wasn't around a lot of black people, so instead of being seen as black, I was seen as an "oreo", which was highly annoying. I'm just thankful black women have been allowed out of the box we've been put in and I'm not seen as a "weird" black girl, but just as a black girl. Not to mention, black girls were the ones telling me to stop feeling weird and they embraced me. I know that's not the same as your story, but believe me, black women are some of the most welcoming souls on the planet, despite being treated the way they are, but that's a whole other story, lol.

@Chloeeezyyy 4 жыл бұрын

BooDotBoo I had this same experience.

@alandriaontheinternet6900 4 жыл бұрын

True

@serinaher 2 жыл бұрын

This is a sensitive subject for me. I have a few things that stick out for me. I am mixed. When people see me the only thing they know is that I’m mixed with black. They have no real idea of what else I am. That means I still experience antiblackness. I still experience discrimination. I am still objectified and sent messages (more than not) that I am not the standard of beauty in the broader world. I have experienced a lot of exclusion from people of all races. I understand how colorism works and what that means for me/others. I understand that some black people don’t want me to call myself black and why. But that also doesn’t make me “not black” to other racial groups (white/Asian/native). I occupy a space that gets me mixed results in the power hierarchy of race that are still mostly negative compared to other groups. For example, I don’t feel as privileged in a white world as White, non black Latinos, or Asian people. When I get hired somewhere I am always expecting discrimination in terms of opportunities in the workplace from the people in power (usually non black people) its always a possibility and I feel the ceilings. Bottom line, I still experience antiblack and racial trauma, so I still deserve some compassion. I think there is space for all of us to advocate for ourselves if we make room for one another. I don’t think it’s mutually exclusive to advocate for unambiguously black women/people and myself. Specifically I shouldn’t have to pretend I don’t experience racism to make other people feel seen. I can acknowledge the unique/specific ways unambiguously blk ppl/women experience racism and also acknowledge the instances that overlap and unique/specific ways it affects someone like myself I have space for all of it. I like to hang with people that treat me like a human because thats what we all want. I am not responsible for other peoples projections onto mixed bodies. I don’t have any direct power over anyone therefore I don’t feel like I owe it to anyone to explain my existence. I don’t owe anyone an apology for the body I was born in. Mixed people come in a whole spectrum of shades and features and proximity to blackness (or ___ness). We have different ethnic backgrounds. Not all mixed people have a non black parent. We are a minority within the minorities. I have my own shit to deal with beacause lets be real... Being mixed doesnt mean your life is easy in a racist sexist world. If what people really want is empathy they need to just ask for that. BOTTOM LINE: We shouldn’t speak on behalf of each other’s experiences or make assumptions. We aren’t walking in each other’s shoes. I'm over the gas lighting of all afrodecendants. More compassion and uplifting, less comparison.

@Jerseyisnakedbareitall 4 жыл бұрын

The show was based in the late 70’s early 80’s. Interracial marriage was legal as of 1967. Which by the writing wouldn’t effected them as they were in a cult that advocated that as normalcy. The show is a journey of how an interracial family establishes themselves from their culture within a cult back into normal society. Which I am sure was on purpose so the viewer whether black or white can see themselves.

@kenyett7 4 жыл бұрын

I also like that the kids seem to be having an identity crisis, bringing forth an issue that people who aren't mixed have never quite experienced exactly as we have.

@Jerseyisnakedbareitall 4 жыл бұрын

That’s not exactly true. Mixed in culture can bring forward those same feelings of disconnection, isolation, and visible differences. As a girl who grew up Nigerian American I was never Nigerian enough and maybe too American. They’re plenty of similarities in that context.

@kenyett7 4 жыл бұрын

@@Jerseyisnakedbareitall Girl, I was mostly talking about the majority of people who've never been anywhere but their living room couch XD I know there is a unique set of issues to those who are born of different cultures or those who immigrated young and have to grow up with different cultures that are similar to the ones mixed people have to confront. We both can relate to "I am both, yet I am neither." But that is still the minority to the rest of the world. And I can only speak for what I know.

@Jerseyisnakedbareitall 4 жыл бұрын

TheFunniestEvr there is nothing wrong with that and I respect ✊🏿

@2120musiclover 4 жыл бұрын

Watch For Harriet’s video on the show; she brings up some great points where even with the show’s setting, lots of things don’t add up

@toyabrooks6615 4 жыл бұрын

I am a black woman and I love you dearly. Honestly, I met you and was tongue tied in your presence. I adore you self reflection and vulnerability in every video. I have loved all your videos on race and relationships and how authentic they are.

@toyabrooks6615 4 жыл бұрын

@DarthYuYevon sounds like you have no sense. Straight women can admire other powerful women.

@toyabrooks6615 4 жыл бұрын

@DarthYuYevon you are making a judgement on me based on what you would or would not say. You and I are two different people. I am a married woman with two children. I aspire to raise my daughter as self aware and secure as Shannon is. I admire women who's traits I would like to instill in my daughter. Your making my admiration into some sexual perversion.

@highpriestess194 4 жыл бұрын

This brought me to tears, thank you for acknowledging the welcoming shared between you and black women. I'm so glad I've come to a place where I know that the space in the black community for ambiguous women does not endanger my identity. I root for you, and I'm proud in knowing you're rooting for us ✨

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

The feels 💫❤️

@gold3c514 4 жыл бұрын

I love this video!💗 Imagine hearing your community praise blackness and how they love being black...and then you step out into the world as a dark skinned (fenty 495) curly/kinky haired girl and your own don’t accept you. I experienced not fitting into any race even tho I’m as black as it gets, but people who were barely black were embraced and praised. Black males made sure that anytime I was in their presence, I knew how dark and ugly I was. Black females made sure to not associate with me, because it wasn’t cool to. Mixed or light females and males just followed. I wouldn’t have a problem with Mixed-ish if society wasn’t geared the way it is. Many people see the show and get to hear the truth about many mixed raced experiences and then they place blame on dark women. There is always a platform for mixed people to share the truth, but when it comes to black women we have to rely on others to say it or sugar coat the issue so we aren’t seen as angry and problematic.

@nadaleenatasha 4 жыл бұрын

hannah challenger I completely feel ur pain

@jlcii 4 жыл бұрын

The big struggle I personally can say with being black mix is that your struggle is made light of. There's this false belief that you have privilege and pedestals because of being light-skinned, but yet when society is still rejecting you, putting you down, and calling you a nigga just like they do with those who are dark-skinned, you're still supposed to believe you have privilege. Meanwhile, you have the hateful darker skin blacks that want to say "you're not black" and denounce your struggles as merely being you not being "coddled", but these are the same people that want someone to sympathize with them when their shade of concealer isn't available from a makeup line, or because a colorist black man with money said he only likes light skin women with "good hair". The struggles of colorism against dark skinned black (women) is real, and it is horrible and wrong, there is no denying that. But that doesn't make ALL light skin black people the cause, and nor do we have the so-called "privilege" were made out to have. I've still been call racial slurs, disrespected, and harassed by law enforcement like every other black person. why am I made out to have privilege just because I don't necessarily have the same struggles as someone who is dark skinned? someone who is dark-skinned doesn't have the same struggles of someone who is light skinned; you're not told to go start your own race. Does that make you privileged?

@elimo3901 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this Shan. To me being mixed is both a curse and a blessing. I'm grateful for my mixed heritage - I feel like it's easier to connect with different groups and communities, and have empathy for people who are different from me - but like you said it can be very lonely. Growing up in a predominantly white society in Denmark I attended an international school, which meant that even though I was the only brown person in my Danish family I knew about different ethnicities and cultures from people I went to school with. I think it helped my experience a lot, to not feel out of place. This, and having a connection to Toronto. The city's multiculturalism always made me feel safe and accepted when we visited. Actually the schools I went to became whiter the older I got. So I have the opposite experience than you. My experience was so different from my class mates and I would be asked about my heritage much more often. Also later in jobs my colleagues would question my skin and hair. To feel less othered I did two things in my adult life. I found an association for people of the Caribbean and met people from Trinidad - my father's country - and black people. I met some kindred spirits who were also mixed and we started an association focusing on unrepresented voices through poetry, art, music and dance. We became friends with performers and people in the audience. This is how our community of poc was born. These are people I enjoy being around and feel welcomed by. I'm not saying I don't feel welcomed by white people, I do. I just feel safer and more relaxed around black/ poc people, I can't really explain it. I think with white people I'm afraid they exotify me or I feel like I'm not chosen or taken seriously - both with work and in terms of relationships. I think it has to do with privilege. I know I'm privileged in the black community. But even so I still hear that I'm not black. As a mixed person it can be truly exhausting. You never truly fit in. And because I was born by a white woman I could never see myself as black. I'm mixed or brown.

@brittanyedwards8862 4 жыл бұрын

it warms my heart so much to be a black woman and hear about how much the black women in your life have supported you and created space for you. we love you shan! & i feel that the best way to navigate the role of a woman mixed with black heritage is the way you do: consciously and with understanding. knowing you don’t face the same experiences, but understanding that many people’s relationship with race has nothing to do with you, but with the constructs and/or hurt they’ve integrated into their beliefs about race.

@qtkeyah 4 жыл бұрын

I appreciate your honesty, sensitivity, effort and humility Shan!

@tylertriplett1323 4 жыл бұрын

The points in this video are very well said. I especially love how you mention your experience with the support of black women, as I can relate. I’m mixed as well & black women to me have been very uplifting and supportive. I’ve been so fortunate to come across many strong amazing sistas in my life(friends,aunts, cousins) and will always be grateful for them. I’ve only felt rejected, outcasted or simply not black enough around a handful of black people but still a substantial amount. I don’t at all fault them for feeling this way about me because I know it comes from a place of pain.

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

Tyler this is very much in line with how I feel

@DelovelyD 4 жыл бұрын

This was a great video. Being a light skinned black woman I always thought biracials were just “whining” when they spoke about their issues. It seemed like every time a dark/brown skinned women spoke a biracial woman had something to say and it was always akin to the same defense that light women make of not feeling black enough/being made fun of by dark girls. I saw this as bullshit and it turned me off to biracial women, but this video makes me want to be more loving and understanding to our biracial black brothers and sisters.

@KayLombo 4 жыл бұрын

The way you mentioned how you're grateful for the love you got from black women just made me teary eyed ❤

@edithgonzalez328 4 жыл бұрын

I'm not biracial but this sounds like my experience growing up between 2 cultures.

@lajeanmaker3271 4 жыл бұрын

Hallelujah. I feel yea

@sskyla5865 4 жыл бұрын

Same. I’m bilingual/bicultural, but white (my parents are immigrants, I grew up between a European country & the US)

@Rantitoutloud 4 жыл бұрын

Some call it the third culture generation. It's awfully similar to being mixed racially but rather culturally. I identify as a 3rd culture kid, having lived in 2 different continents during my developmental stages.

@sitas9827 4 жыл бұрын

I can relate

@towandaatasteoffashion 4 жыл бұрын

This is really deep! Good to hear your experience & how you grew up! Love you girl 😍❤️😘

@jc6086 4 жыл бұрын

I really want to thank you for the portion of the video when you acknowledge that being able to distance yourself from race is a privileged statement. As a black woman I realize that the older I get the MORE important race gets, because along with race, you worry about things like age, or not becoming a “stereotype” like becoming a single mom or dropping out of college (neither which are bad but are typically looked down upon especially when dealing with black women) and then there’s raising your kids to be proud being black, etc etc. Anywho thank you for being so culturally aware and sharing so much positivity and praising black women. I’m definitely buying your book.

@zsazsalove2259 4 жыл бұрын

I love when she acknowledges her struggles and privileges..and LOVE that’s she acknowledged that the blk community even included her because white ppl really do not include mixed blk ppl period. But no one talks about that they just condemn blk ppl for not accepting everyone

@hellaSwankkyToo 4 жыл бұрын

03:10 - 04:32 ← THANK YOU!! "i am a better person b|c i've been loved by Black people; specifically Black women." someday this will be the opening to a chapter in my memoir. preach my life doe. whew.

@TheOnylove 4 жыл бұрын

Black women are powerful and goddesses. They will always STAN and up lift anyone. And through that community, people usually are better off for it. I think that is why we are the most disrespected humans in this world. People know our power and are scared of it, so they try to squash it anyway they can. Thank you for acknowledging the role that black women play in your life. It's important for someone with your "privilege" to do so.

@mcarthurspark8636 4 жыл бұрын

@DarthYuYevon I don't see anyone disrespecting Asian women as she articulated about black women. Try again.

@BehindTheScenesM2GH 4 жыл бұрын

DarthYuYevon why do you care? She has the right to say how she feels.. your comment was foolish.

@BehindTheScenesM2GH 4 жыл бұрын

@DarthYuYevon No she said that because of her life experience. Now maybe you feel like it's something wrong with others, not her; or maybe you knows she right and it kills you because your not black..

@mcarthurspark8636 4 жыл бұрын

@DarthYuYevon That is not true at all. If I say that cup of chocolate latte was awesome. Does that mean a cup of vanilla latte cannot also be awesome? You are reaching real hard. Have a great day.

@TheOnylove 4 жыл бұрын

DarthYuYevon It’s a shame that is where you take such an amazing comment uplifting black women. This KZbin video specifically pointed out the beauty of Black women and mentioned the impact they have on her life. My comment made no degrading remarks about another race. And for one thing to be great does not equal another being worse or less than. Just like people can love Vanilla Ice Cream and others can love Chocolate Ice Cream doesn’t mean the other is worse. I’ll pray for you and hope you have a great day.

@Ashley-ur9in 4 жыл бұрын

Hit the nail on the freakin' head. And this is why I support you Shan.

@DrkMtrz 4 жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing shannon. Identity is an important topic that we as black people need to unpack some more because there's a lot of shame in being mixed or not being mixed when you grow up in the black community or at least that has been my experience. we are the most exotic people on the planet we are certainly not a monolith and found in every corner of the globe so i think that's why we are so welcoming however in the americas identity is so nuanced.

@mrslias11 4 жыл бұрын

Shan, I really feel your vulnerability through my phone screen. I’m in awe!

@UrCupOfJo16 4 жыл бұрын

I live in Baltimore and Coppin is THEE WORST HBCU that you could’ve chose girl 😭. Coppin is Way too small and people are mean as hell there. Morgan or Towson would’ve been a lot more welcoming and I’m sorry that happened.

@ax1338 4 жыл бұрын

Towson isn't a hbcu but I'm definitely going there because there is a nice mixed of everyone there. Definitely a good population of black/African people

@Destiny-lt3eo 4 жыл бұрын

Yea Towson isn't a HBCU but it is very diverse.

@Idanimowellness 4 жыл бұрын

BlackSwan I’m from Baltimore too and I said the same thing 😂 should’ve went to Howard or somewhere down south

@imdifferent7294 4 жыл бұрын

People from Baltimore are just mean af in general.

@UrCupOfJo16 4 жыл бұрын

Big Blaccc I know it’s not but I suggested it because I go there and I love it even though it can be white as hell sometimes

@user-vw3zi2wp5w 4 жыл бұрын

This video was quite insightful and informative. I can't honestly say I've sat down with a mixed person before to discuss race and identity politics. I had to take a minute and wonder why I'm so dismissive of biracial people and honestly I can say its bc what I feel is the second we're in a space together, I basically don't exist. The second we're after the same thing, I know I have to work twice as hard . Regardless of whether that's true or not its what has been made to seem like the truth for me as a dark skinned woman. And its true w most biracial people they will approach you with a "hey I'm black too! I get oppressed too!". From where I stand, I see all the things you get, all the doors that open themselves for you because you look the way you do. Doors that I will have to break my back working the next few years for. It honestly does leave a bitter taste in my mouth. At the same time I realized I do find myself moving to make space for biracial people. Not for any reason other than its not your fault. You didn't choose the hand you were dealt same as me. And people are people, its always nice to enjoy that blissful moment where you're getting to know someone as an individual before reality kicks in. This video has given me a lot to think about.

@tashalouise5247 4 жыл бұрын

"Cause for pause"??? I'm gonna start using this

@allthingsloveone4584 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for acknowledging and being honest about our (black women and culture) of being open to and holding space for mixed people to identify as black or bi racial so much so, as we even alienate non ambiguously black people in preference of ambiguity in blackness

@katbme84 4 жыл бұрын

I love you for this. And thank you. Just in general for sharing your story and for recognizing the good community space we do create as black women. Too many stories of us not uplifting and loving and caring for one another. We don’t do this perfectly, but I do believe our true heart space is communal and familial.

@bramia72 4 жыл бұрын

I’ve never related to a story more than yours! I love you so much for this, THANK YOU ♥️♥️

@AmaraReyal 4 жыл бұрын

3:30 I SCREEAMED! finallyyyyyy someone said it!

@bbernabe08 4 жыл бұрын

You are always able to articulate yourself so eloquently. You broke everything down beautifully and as an identifiably black woman I’m proud to call you my fellow sister. ❤️

@AthenaRenee1 4 жыл бұрын

I love you sister for seeing me. For seeing us and the overall stress of black women

@rachelachola5913 4 жыл бұрын

as a 17-year-old mixed girl with a white mom and Kenyan dad I am pretty dark for a "lightskin". Growing up people always assumed i was adopted and many people would think that my mom who i love so dearly wasn't my bio mom. I went to a pretty white grade school and the white kids would always say the n-word which bothered me even if they weren't saying it directly to me and the black kids called me an oreo. I thought i was ugly and I just wanted to be white like my mom. In high school I have started to accept myself but I don't know who embraces me yet. Except for my mom who i love.

@MissDuch 4 жыл бұрын

I hope things get better darling x

@tirby8246 4 жыл бұрын

rachel achola your biracial that is who you are embrace that and both white and black will embrace you

@oihcam22 4 жыл бұрын

If you’re dark, you’re not light skinned...

@ClassificationOther 3 жыл бұрын

I have a white mother and a Kenyan father as well and a lot of what you're saying I can totally relate to. I remember kids asking me if I was adopted and being so confused as to why they would ask that and wanting to be like my white mom. I went to elementary school with mostly non-black latino kids who had a similar skin tone to me, so my feeling of otherness wasn't exactly about my skin it was because of my big curly hair. I ended up relaxing my hair from age 9 to 17. It wasn't really until i went to a predominately white high school that I felt I stood out because of my race. It was there, that people identified me as black and I got more used to it although I always wanted to identify with mixed, though I didn't feel i had the autonomy to. When I was 19 I traveled to Kenya for the first time and I was seen as white. this was deeply confusing to me growing up in the U.S. Im 22 now and have come to realize that I do have autonomy to embrace and identify as mixed and biracial, not because I don't want to accept my white side and not because I don't accept my black side but because I do embrace both sides of me and because thats the experience I've lived. whether someone see's me as black, white, something completely different or something in-between I still see the world through my mixed-race view, since that is my experience, and I have the right to identify as such. I say all this to say, you are not alone. I know how difficult that can feel but there will be people that embrace and accept you for exactly who you are regardless of their race and regardless of yours!

@44nk96 3 жыл бұрын

You really amazing me, I’ve been watching your videos a lot lately, mainly because of your elevated mindset and ability to stay centred while dealing with such an archaic, critical and programmed society. I grew up in a very religious, very critical, VERY small minded, very regimented Eastern European culture. Growing up in a western country as an only child, I am constantly battling against the expectations of who I am ‘meant’ to be. I am ashamed and embarrassed at the type of child/teenager I was, until I was able to educated myself to be better. To say I am resentful of how I grew up, is an understatement. I am proud to of fought against it. It’s funny, the people who have been the most controlling, most manipulative, most judgmental and most narrow minded, are the ones who think I’m evil, because I refuse to be apart of a mindset that makes me feel horrible. I am fascinated how you can stay so calm and centred amongst ignorant people who are treating you the same way that they were treated and that they hate. Hurt people, hurt people. When ignorant people criticise me, or through out their unsolicited and disgusting opinions....I see rage. I don’t want to be polite, I don’t want to be understanding, I don’t want to educate them, I want to scream at them for their disgusting mindset and for their entitlement. That rage of course surges inside of me, and I either freeze or reply nicely, but beat myself up after, as I am so ANGRY that they got away with it. I only reply with anger if they keep harassing me about it. Even when I watched that clip of you on The View, I felt such RAGE at Joy’s judgment and dismissal of you, as well as when I watched Loni speak to you on The Real. I wish that anger I feel wouldn’t consume me so much, but I really felt for you in those moments. You and your partner must constantly face such ignorant comments and questions and you both chose to educate people. You are better than I could ever be. I just wish I could express my thoughts, educate someone, but also let them know that their thoughts/opinions are bigoted and rude and that they should get educated or install a filter, to have an ounce of tact. It’s very difficult having family who I know will die with their bigoted views and will never change, it’s very hard to accept. My friends are more family to me than my family, some blood relatives just feel entitled to your soul and being.

@empireexperiential7989 4 жыл бұрын

Hay Shan! Thanks so much for writing this! I have somewhat similar but different story. I'm a black female, who's been adopted by white British family in South Africa. Race, where you come from what you speak and ethnicity is a huge thing here, because I had English speaking parents I didn't speak an African language, which got me bullied and frowned looks all the time. It wasn't until I was a bit older and changed school where I started mixing with other people's cultures and race that I found real acceptance and love for myself, especially through black women. . Taught me how to embrace myself, with all the things I was self conscious from my hair, my flat face, big lips, thick thighs and coco skin.

@ajohnson8125 4 жыл бұрын

This made me cry all in all by the end. Relate so heavy to these experiences.

@SolarVixen 4 жыл бұрын

let it out girl💕💕💕

@ola3rd 4 жыл бұрын

"North or South Toronto?" 😂

@coreenamusic 4 жыл бұрын

Can I just say I’m very happy you identify as mixed. As someone who is very dark skin, I cannot occupy multiple spaces unless I was willing to function in denial. Mixed is not a bad word, just like black isn’t. All is good ❤️

@msgirly6827 4 жыл бұрын

Agreed

@healthilycynical4708 4 жыл бұрын

You not being able to occupy multiple different spaces is not any mixed person's problem, though.

@ToniOne03 4 жыл бұрын

HealthilyCynical she didn’t say it was...she said that she’s happy that she identifies as biracial as am I because there is a difference.

@healthilycynical4708 4 жыл бұрын

@@ToniOne03 It was implied when she followed up her comment about being happy with Shan's identification as biracial, with a comment about how she, as a darker black woman, cannot occupy multiple spaces.

@itsbritt9155 4 жыл бұрын

HealthilyCynical your reaching for something that’s not there . 🙄

@Iamniko__ 4 жыл бұрын

This is a little different from, but relates. As a mixed Asian person, I’ve always felt lost in the world of performing arts b/c there was and is nobody like me. I couldn’t go to my Hmong friends to talk bc they simply couldn’t relate. I couldn’t go to my Chinese friends either Bc they simply couldn’t understand why I would want this. It was the Black community that opened their arms to me that made me feel like yes this gift is worth pursuing, yes your Asian features are beautiful, yes you can feel safe here, yes we will try to understand you, yes you are loved. If Black singers, writers, artists, speakers, and teachers didn’t exist nor would I. Nor would the love I feel radiating off of me today. Nor would the acceptance I have found in myself.

@fuzzbuzz6859 4 жыл бұрын

NIKO SINGS That’s so sweet, glad you feel seen and accepted in a community

@SolarVixen 4 жыл бұрын

💓💓💓💓

@WifeandWifeTV 4 жыл бұрын

My Grandmother’s (both sides) are of similar ancestry ( East Indian & black/coolie/Jamaican) and she shared similar experiences growing up. It’s a tough position to be in. My family didn’t realize they were “ different” until coming to the states. I’m glad you shared your experiences. The issue some unambiguous black women have is mixed women being pushed as the representation of black women. I love that you have acknowledged that your story and experiences are different, though they are just as valid, but different. The black community has been pressured, through comparative pain, to accept and even elevate mixed race people to positions that hurt black representation. It’s a result of wh!te supremacy, but it pits us against each other. I’ve always wondered why there isn’t a pressure for the white community to accept the same. I’m glad you acknowledged the black community providing a space that white (and other) communities do not. As time goes on with racial mixing, there will be an identifiable community for mixed race people. That’s changing. Blessings to you.

@thatsvickiIRL 4 жыл бұрын

didn’t realize they were “ different” until coming to the states - that part was more apparent for me since Jamaica embraced me for just existing !!! I think my unaccepting asian grandmother may have had a head start on that one.

@Tierramariethinks 4 жыл бұрын

It’s incredible that you felt and continue to feel welcomed by the black community, and did not have the experience of being gate-kept and ostracized however, that hasn’t been my experience at all being half white ( and half black) and my only friend who is mixed the same way I am had experienced this same othering I have, to an even worse degree. I think it’s extremely important that this show is bringing light to that. Most of the world will only ever see me as black but black people so often disregard my blackness when it isn’t benefiting them. It’s painful and hurt me a lot as a child. I understand the politics and history of why it is this way, and even with the pushback I’ve experienced I still find myself a part of the black community, even if I have to fight for my place. Just my thoughts on the matter. Much love ❤️

@EUFORIK5MOK3 4 жыл бұрын

That's unfortunate. Check out these channels kzbin.info/door/mkTWttE1NKI1FDdp5KJ9Lg kzbin.info/door/2madqvi5oTbLfM9ePrO32w

@melinatedvessel6840 4 жыл бұрын

Please,don't check out these hateful channels for your own sake. These channels are where people go to push blame on people who have nothing to do with their pain. Ultimately it is your own individual choice & journey. In this video she stated that she herself put the burden of making HER feel welcome on WHO...BLACK PEOPLE. Is this fair?NO This is why the 1 drop rule was created,it was an attack on black love/family. Engaging in what there engaging in over there makes white supremacy the winner. Why isn't your other side given that task? ASK YOURSELVES THAT... I think that is where the TRUE HEALING begins for so many.

@hailithinksyourcute 4 жыл бұрын

Shan, thank you for having this conversation. You said everything you needed to say with as much grace as possible while still being true to the conversation you were trying to hold. As a darker skinned woman it's always good to listen to the experiences of mixed people, genuinely acknowledge their differences and still hold communal space when and where we can for each other. Good talk ❤️😊

@mackrobinson8853 3 жыл бұрын

As a Canadian mixed girl it made me cry when she spoke about how she was treated in school because I went to a rural white high school and the way they treated me made me so sad because I had never experienced that racism and I hope schools here make a real effort to make kids understand the damage it does when they bully others based on race.

@malikshwehdi1210 4 жыл бұрын

I’m A mixed person! and from the 6 years that I had spent in the Emirates (throughout high school) , no other community had made me feel so welcome and accepted for who I am, and belong, like the Sudanese community. God bless people of Sudan.

@sharnya8332 3 жыл бұрын

That's so nice!

@jsawhite 4 жыл бұрын

as a mixed person who's older than you are, the black welcoming was not always there... My father's family really had nothing to do with my brother and I. All my cousins were welcomed and loved. We were just the kids from that white lady... it was a very different world in the late 70's and early 80's... you also forgot to talk about the fact that you have a hard time filling out forms. Most tell you to choose one race. I'm not only white, I'm not only black... Newer forms let you choose multiple or have a multi-race option, but that is a fairly recent thing... :)

@tiffanyr4355 4 жыл бұрын

They have boxes were you can check both or multicultural/ multiracial didn't have that back in the 80s or 70s

@megae859 4 жыл бұрын

Maybe they didn't like your mom. Or maybe your mom didnt feel comfortable.

@StephanieOmenai 4 жыл бұрын

@jsawhite - I'm glad your white family and the white community welcomed, embraced, loved you and did not judge you. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive your black family.

@jsawhite 4 жыл бұрын

@Leïla G not at first! It took many years for my mother's parents to warm up to my father... Now, once they did warm up they were good with us, but they were much worse before that. So it was on side, never really was all that great with us, but wasn't mean. The other side started out mean then was good with us... *shrug*

@jsawhite 4 жыл бұрын

@@StephanieOmenai lol... yeah, if it was all that simple. Not even hardly. I, too, grew up in mostly white communities. The racism I had to endure growing up was despicable... But, I hold no malice for either community. You have to remember this was back in the late 70's early 80's. While racism still exists today, it nothing like it was back then (or even when my parents first got together). Please don't feel that I have any resentment for anything I endured growing up. If nothing else it made me the way I am and gave me an unique look and appreciation for the diversity of today's world!

@sabrinapeitz7288 3 жыл бұрын

Watching this so late, but at maybe minute 18 or so, you mention someone verbally acknowledging you as part of the black community and I myself as a mixed woman have had that experience maybe twice now this past year and my feeling was very similar. It felt silly but it meant so much to me to be seen as part of the group and not just this kind of brown girl.

@jaxxie 4 жыл бұрын

I see your disclaimer at the beginning really helped the conversation in the comments. I'm Kenyan and for the longest time didn't know about the one-drop rule in the US, while I was busy consuming their media content. Some of us thought life is so good that the blacks over there had "evolved" lol! Always nice to hear someone's story, I'm really curious about a lot of things.

@bethanyreed6827 4 жыл бұрын

Oh man! I can so relate! Being biracial (black and white) was extremely hard for me growing up. I lived in a small white town with my white family(I was adopted) and I was definitely labeled as black. I was bullied very heavily through school and was never ever the first pick. Sports was the only exception. I don’t get into a more diverse group until college. That was the first time I started seeing attention from guys and they were all black men. I have definitely found, from listening to dark skin black women, that it is better for my to identify as biracial and not black. I will never try to invade a black woman’s space and I wish to do whatever I can to include them and let them know they are bomb.

@Fnubee 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing. It is interesting that you make the distinction that darker skinned black women say that you should not identify as black. I am considered light skinned by some but in my family there are people much lighter than me-some with hazel green eyes and wavy 3b/c hair. Because of my family make-up I think it is ridiculous to suggest that lighter skinned or biracial black women aren't really "black". Everyone in my family checks the 'black' box. My lighter skinned ancestors lived through segregation/Jim Crow and have ALWAYS been part of the black community. Having white ancestry is nothing new to the black community. It is unfortunate that colorism exist and darker skinned black women get overlooked. When the dominant society makes attempts at diversity they choose lighter black women or biracial black women in order to fulfill the black quota and often leave darker black women out. I believe darker skinned black women's solution is to limit the number of people who get to call themselves black so then they can be included. This notion is flawed. What we should all be doing is calling out colorism while recognizing we're one people.

@ncamara670 4 жыл бұрын

You should decide how to identify, not other people. Racial identity is a complicated thing which depends on our experiences. It does not mean you are invading anyone's space. Finding a community with shared experience will help you a lot.

@TRexaBreaksFree 4 жыл бұрын

My parents are both African but my grandad and some part of my mother's family are Portuguese. This means my dad is black and my mom is white (although both are african) and as a curly hair (3b too!) light skinned girl taught with african values in mind I absolutely did not fit anywhere. For the portuguese community, I most times "passed" as a white person but could not identify with the culture. With the african-portuguese community I could relate to the culture but was too light skinned to belong. I've been discriminated against for being too light skinned and too dark skinned, and I can honestly say that I have never been truly accepted in either communities. Everybody has different experiences and this might not be the norm at all, but this general non acceptance has been what I've experienced so far.

@AJ-fl3pz 4 жыл бұрын

Tania Silva your mom is not a native African therefore she is not a real African

@courtr1588 4 жыл бұрын

I found it that in "Black-ish" over half of the family was 'mixed' but now there's a Mixed-ish show. I believe both/all stories need to be told but it does get annoying when people who are mixed with Black get platforms to speak on what it means to be Black/African. And Black people get put down if we want to acknowledge our differences in experience because of our race. That said, I want to reiterate that I do believe people who are mixed with Black do need a platform to speak on their experiences. I hope that they can take blueprints from the rights movements of people of other races (and part of their own 'races') to build that new community. I think it would do our ancestors proud. I as a BW just really appreciate you sharing your journey and acknowledging your differences as well as all that we have alike. I love the videos where you talk about your family and all of its cultures. I think it's really cool and I think your channel is dope! By the way, thank you so much for helping put your new book on Bookshare so quickly. I absolutely loved it. Weirdly, Courtney and I were almost complete 'mirrors' of each other. (Let me act like that wasn't a sign, LOL.)

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

I totally understand this POV! Thanks for sharing

@shanboody 4 жыл бұрын

but that to be said if you watch Mixed-ish it also tells the story of Tika's character as a black woman in that era so I think both perspectives will be told too

@courtr1588 4 жыл бұрын

@@shanboody That's true. I just think it's weird they made her character darker to "stress" how Black she was when in Black-ish her character was (or how mixed her kids were? idk) so light skinned she almost looks "White" when her hair is straightened. On Black-ish Tika's character was played by Anna Deavere Smith. I'm all for representation of darker skinned people (regardless of race, but also kind of especially because I am dark skinned lol) but I was like "We supposed to ignore this?" It was like a reverse Aunt Viv. 🤣🤣🤣 Maybe they'll address it. I'm willing to give it a chance in the hopes this opens up doors of other mixed kids all around the world.

@craftylady11 4 жыл бұрын

I discovered your channel because of those comments that were made on The Real. So I wanted to see what your platform was and learn more. Let me say, I’m so glad I did. You are such a beautiful person, inside and out. You have a beautiful spirit. Your physical beauty is astounding. You are doing a wonderful job helping people so keep up the good work. I can see you came from a loving family. You actually remind of a very good friend of mine who looks similar to you. When you said you went to Coppin, I was like, okay! 😃 That same friend used to work at Coppin. I will definitely be purchasing your book and will continue to follow you. I wish you all the best in all of your endeavors. The black community is always more accepting of others when those same people aren’t so acceptable of us. I see you as my sister! A strong woman who is talented, kind and fierce! You are just a rainbow of flavors! God Bless!

@getwithlu 4 жыл бұрын

Racially ambiguous women identifying and claiming their privilege legit makes my heart flutter because they are self aware and are using their privilege to provoke some type of change.

@tramos8264 4 жыл бұрын

Shan is always coming at us with amazing content!

@HakeemIsMyWorld 4 жыл бұрын

We love you Shan! I am not looking for a relationship but I got your book anyway because I want to support you! You are a wonderful human not just a beautiful woman of color. Keep doing what you are doing!

@TiffanyNicholeCatley 4 жыл бұрын

I think your points on this topic and your take away from your own experiences are wonderful. Our experiences should be shared and not compared as I think this a big issue in society. Conversation and compassion are key. Inspired by your journey.

@kwameocran2246 4 жыл бұрын

If only there were more people like you in the world. Oh, the problems we would fix.

@sereneebaby 4 жыл бұрын

Kwame Ocran oh there are, they just don’t have a platform.

@kwameocran2246 4 жыл бұрын

@@sereneebaby that makes sense

@faithbxo1416 4 жыл бұрын

i can relate to the appreciation of the black community as a mixed person. I'm more identifiable as black compared to shannon as in any non black person will straight up identify me as black but every black person i meet asks what I'm mixed with. lol my mom is full samoan and my dad is half black and half mexican. i grew up around both sides of my family and have never felt like i didn't belong. but outside my family I've always naturally surrounded myself around black people. the majority of my friends in school, the majority of the guys I've dated and the easiest group of people i relate to is definitely black people.

@amena_music 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for expressing your story to us! I am 20, mixed race and was brought up and studdy in very white areas in England. I've been very lucky to have been accepted in the white community (for the most part) even though I really stand out here. My most recent problem though was that I went to an event at my uni that was run by the Black/Carribean society and I have never felt so scared to talk to people. I'm usually so chatty with new people but I just felt so out of place and all I want is to be able to feel the same way I do around my black family and embrace my love for black culture. On the family side of things too, I feel that my white side of the family find it very uncomfortable when I talk about my African heritage, They wont admit it but I'm very concious of it. Thanks again, I love your Videos x

@brownizora 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing your experience I don't think I've heard a mixed person come from this perspective it's always accussing us of jealousy. It's refreshing to hear it from this perspective