She Can’t Come to Work Because of Her Personal Life

[@ditttch]

I’m a director at a CRO in the pharma industry, and we’ve seen this behavior before. We are very flexible here, and with that comes the few who will abuse the privilege. If you don’t address it right away, then the only person to blame is yourself. Some people will test the limits of the privileges in the workplace. The most negative thing that comes from letting this behavior go on is the destruction of morale amongst the others who are playing by the rules. Those people who are there doing their job have to absorb the work that the ‘slacker’ isn’t doing. They can clearly see it, and if left unaddressed, they will resent the management for it. Real, hardworking talent, will eventually leave if the behavior goes unchecked.

[@mph5896]

Exactly. Have a policy in place on absences, late, leaving early and enforce it fairly.

[@Maya_Unplugged]

Pharma industry. Yaiks.

[@John-du2mq]

Those are the ones getting promoted now days

[@ditttch]

@ unfortunately, yes, many incompetent people make it into management, more often than not because they’re friends with the right person

[@theL0VERS]

My daughters school called me every other week. It was 4th through 11th grade. She would fake some illness and the nurse called. I stopped answering the phone years ago. I also would say that finding a safety net helps. Friends and family in the area that are willing to pick up little susie.

[@smalltownglobalproductions]

We had an employee like this once too and we sat down and drew out a very serious contract and went through every clause and she had to sign it at the end. We told her that this was her last chance and since then she has lived up to it almost 100%. I think she thought that if it was a good reason to miss it was okay and that's just not true is Dave stated in today's program. Don't get too close to your employees. Be serious and let them know you mean it and make the expectations clear. Get child care ladies if you want to keep a job!!! Don't use your kids as an excuse to be lazy.

[@singerjo5791]

Don’t threaten our jobs when we are loyal and only miss if absolutely necessary. Been there as a single mom. I got called two or three times from school or daycare in 17 years but was still threatened by my boss.

[@John-du2mq]

Don't be a single mom.

[@Cherrycola14]

As a working mom often my husbands boss will make nasty comments if hubby has to take off an hour early. Trying to guilt trip hubby into me always being the one to have to take time off because I'm the mom. Hubby works for his uncles and they have said things like what the hell does your wife do? I work 3 jobs around husbands hours so he can stay at his job and bring in the same amount if income as him. He hasn't had a raise in 3 years and starting wages in his field are $3 an hour higher than his pay, he's been with the company 22 years A lot of employers see it that the wife should be taking the time off for sick kids. Which trashes her job, putting her at risk of being fired.

[@amywilliams9472]

Although, it's not only her job but also her future. Generally, if you aren't working you might not be putting money away for the future or even if it will be there - social security. Moms get the shaft unfortunately, and in so many ways, but it's all worth it in the end.

[@furryplantsandcoins9070]

​@@amywilliams9472It's only worth it to raise your children but after that it completely sucks. Then you look at your Social Security amount and you got screwed. Especially if you had to take a lot of time off of work to raise your children. The only good way to work around that is to take your husband's (If you were married more than 10 years) spousal benefits. But if you're like me and became disabled early but never married your spouse until later on in life and only stayed married for a few years it screws you. I was with my ex since I was 22 we finally married back in 2011 and was only married for about 3 years. Which I will not see anything from that because we weren't technically married. Gave my whole entire life to him. Unfortunately that marriage law was killed off before we got together. The one where you are common-law married. Otherwise I would have seen something from it. But I don't know cuz I think I made more than him. I worked my butt off in the home and at the jobs I have even though I had issues with my physical mental health.

[@beautifulday7528]

I agree, but that doesn't mean her co-workers have to fill in the gap continually. The couple is responsible for managing their own life and relationships and work. Don't saddle your co-workers with extra work because you can't manage your own life.

[@niram4107]

Is hubby searching for a new employer? As another commenter has said, your co-workers should not be responsible for carrying the workload of yourself and your husband if it is a regular occurrence that you or hubby need to leave work early for your children. From your comment, it appears that it is a regular occurrence. In addition, a small business cannot wear the cost of employees regularly not turning up to work for personal reasons or needing to leave work early for personal reasons. It is your responsibility to manage your household and not your employer's. Most employers are gracious towards staff where personal or family reasons come up, but making a regular habit of not coming into work or leaving work early amounts to taking advantage of your employer and co-workers.

[@thomaskraus5125]

She would have to agree to work steady at a lower wage to continue working fewer hours to address her particular health requirements for her child possibly sharing a job with another mother employeed part time with similar need to address children health issues.

[@jimroscovius]

Your employer is not responsible for your kid problems.

[@JackoWacko06]

The first lady needs to get on Every Dollar. Her husband works two jobs, and they need her to work full time?

[@e.d972]

And she is pregnant again. 😳

[@gindie1]

Regarding the Real Estate call, I didn't think you can dictate times (aka sales meetings) to 1099 workers, unless it's in the contract.

[@sabrinagalvan8173]

Great book recommendations! I have some of these books, but not all. I love starting a new booklist. 😊

[@californiadreamer2580]

First caller employee needs to organize a list of trusted babysitters available on short notice. She can call one , take her lunch hour to retrieve her child , get it situated at home and return to work.

[@WoodsintheBurg94]

I’ve read The Bomber Mafia as well as otherMalcom Gladwell books. I like his stuff. I’ve had the privilege to hear John Maxwell in person 3 times.

[@dosesandmimoses]

Incorrect.. there are certain federal laws that require “accommodations” not “grace.” Disability rights don’t require disclosure and this is a possible violation of her rights. Just a heads up .. that could be a lawsuit sir.

[@dosesandmimoses]

Especially with $3 million annually

[@niram4107]

​@dosesandmimose The caller states the business makes $3 million in revenue and that the business has 15 employees. Revenue is not the same as profit. Revenue is the amount generated by a business before expenses and costs are deducted. Profit is what is leftover after expenses and costs have been deducted. Thus, the profit is much less than $3 million.

[@aliciavillagomez9421]

Love it!

[@valerie2645]

Is any part of her job able to be performed remotely?

[@STELLASCUTENESS]

Not a fan of Malcolm Gladwell since I got a sense of his politics. I also feel he’s a better teller of a story than of reality.

[@ricky1925]

I love reading, but when i sit down to read, i get so sleepy i cannot focus.

[@wf4983]

If she is good, don't lose her. Just modify the contract to the current situation. You can't force someone in this situation to give more to their work. But you can't pay them full if the're not working full time. Why does she have to work full time? And also: can't she get a promotion on a part time job? This way, you could still support her (more money per worked hour), but still set a boundary (less money to pay overall for you).

[@rebeccaoliver7977]

All jobs are not suitable to just walking out the door at the drop of a hat.

[@wf4983]

@rebeccaoliver7977 that's exactly what I say. She shouldn't walk out the door and they shouldn"t let her go. They should find a solution. I know they have a business - but so does she: her life (including her private life) is her business. And she has to take care of that, too. If you look at it this way, both will find a suitable situation. If you insist on the model: at one side business owner (has the say) and on the side employee (not resposible position), of course you won't find a solution. For me it's: show some responsibility as an employee + negotiate a little with your team members as an employer. Changing to a part time job is not walking out the door.

[@ChrisHeagerty-g9j]

Dana might need the lead electrical contractor as the licence holder??? Useless having him as an employee. He can up and leave at any point

[@Rebecca-ci3zc]

I have a feeling this lady is scamming their good graces. Kids do get sick but not as often as it sounds like these kids are. Check the average days kids are out sick at their school and that should give him an idea of what’s going on. If it’s more than a few times a year she needs to have the kids checked by a doctor to see if there is more going on with their health.

[@lilaschwarz1236]

I've heard of daycare facilities, kindergardens and schools who call the prents at a very low level of sickness. That should also be looked at.

[@Cherrycola14]

Last school year my kids got sick 13 times. It wasn't an option to take time off every time they got sick. Many mornings I came to work running on 2-4 hrs sleep. Since covid, the isolation and virus have become stronger. Often seeing half the class calling in sick.

[@amywilliams9472]

There might be more than just common childhood illnesses going on as well. Not every child has good health.

[@furryplantsandcoins9070]

Not necessarily. Between getting sick, head lice, poison ivy, covid, bed bugs, mental health issues, etc... Oh don't forget car breaks down, you're sick, etc... there are so many things that people go through! Average does not cut it! Some of us just get sick more often because of autoimmune disorders! Or lack of money for better food for our family because we can't afford it. Don't clump us all in the same basket! My youngest did better during school but my oldest was a complete handful! My oldest missed more school because of her outbursts! But my youngest missed more school due to accidents like roller skating from the school! She screwed up her tailbone so bad that she was facing surgery which never happened. Got her into the chiropractor which they said she would have been better off breaking her tailbone! She still has issues so she still might have to have surgery on it. Thank goodness they are out on their own now. It was a very hard time raising those two. Love them both dearly though would not ever give them up.

[@stolen3moon]

Unfortunately they do. They call you as soon as they get a runny nose and you can't bring your kid in. And when they start the daycare, you are more at home than at work. Which is why I won't get back to my old job, but search for something more adaptable

[@telepotatoe8508]

“Concord players” isn’t a term that can exist anymore

[@daniellebeck8322]

Dave, I loved this stack of book recommendations! As a Christian, who believes that the word of God is enough and that all the answers to life can be found there, what is your argument for devoting precious reading time to these leadership books as opposed to rereading/studying the Bible? Because I only have so many minutes in my day and if I'm reading "x", I can't also use those same minutes to read "y". I do believe that leaders are readers. I need to be a better leader. My team members are my 10 children and counting. I do a similar book report thing, but on the back cover. It's helpful for knowing what books to have my children read next.

[@satyagirl1797]

First call make me sad. I am mom living in Ireland and the amount of days off because child is sick/there is power outage in the afterschool/teachers strike/weather condition etc. This all make me so stressed. Thankfully i work with women aged 50+ and they are so compassionate. Dave's wife stays at home so he has none of it..... Let poor women work part time ...US work culture is bonkers

[@jgjgjg739]

Oh please, the guy was being as accommodating as he can. It’s not his fault his employee is taking off too much time from work. It’s her fault for choosing to have multiple kids when she can’t afford it. She is the one that needs to be compassionate of how she is making everyone else’s life difficult at a small business.

[@Dit1160]

I won’t criticize the work culture of your country…so please return that favor. You have no right to have opinions about my country.

[@Bakersway23]

I dont think parents can help this. Ive been in this position where i became a consultant because of how often my kiddos get sick. Schools force doctor visits which cost money and will call DCS CPS if a child is missing too much school. However no one is calling on the doctors offices no solving or resolving continual sicknesses.. Additionally we have insurance companies that are rejecting medicines rejecting services because of lack of precedent or other entenuating circumstances.. My son was born with a nasal cavity deformity that was discovered after a CT scan.. Suffered with chrinic reocccurrent sinus infectins ear infections headaches and nosebleeds for yearrrrrrrrrrrssssssssss.... I'm talking 20 appointments a year for a 1 minute scan to tell us he needed surgery and he wasnt ever receiving full healing because his sinuses wwrent getting clear. As a mother and employee there needs to be grace.. As a patient or parent there is a need for solving problems and not just putting bandaids or antibiotics on it.. Simple scans like my son had if done as a required check could have saved so much time money and effort on all parts.

[@lucybell1487]

Entitled behavior does not have courageous character in this dental employee

[@icefalco6761]

64% of the Forbes 400 is Jewish. I wonder why that is. Or how that could be. Dave wants to hear what the rabbi has to say, I don’t. John Grisham is a great author tho.

[@OurPerez]

Yikes! This is quite a pickle she put herself in.

[@dakotaflower5926]

Is she calling in sick all the time? And yes Dave, if your child has the Flu and the school calls you - you pick up your kid and stay home with them 🤦‍♂️. Not everyone has had a stay at home wife for the last 50 years like you 😂 This all depends on how often she is calling in sick, but this guy needs to have a simple conversation with her to figure out what you can do to make this work or if you need to part ways.

[@jimroscovius]

My wife and I both worked and had kids. Sometimes, the kid gets sick. That's life. My wife and I took turns picking up the kids if they got sick, which wasn't very often.

[@mradventurer8104]

Ofcourse the kids will get their regular kids illnesses but if you look after them the right way they won't get sick all the time. For example don't feed them coca cola every day but fresh fruit and veg etc. Also, the husband could take turns as others also point out. Why would one employer bear all the brunt?

[@dakotaflower5926]

@@mradventurer8104 True, but young kids are sick all the time (by that, I mean a few times a year, not a few times a month 😂. I don’t think you’re wrong, but that’s why he needs to have a simple conversation about these issues. If she can’t comply after that and get her husband to assist, they need to go separate ways.

[@og6433]

Dave is not a socialist. He is a capitalist. A capitalist doesn't believe in a child having a flu and a parent needing to go pick up a kid from school.

[@mph5896]

Figure out a plan on how to deal with it. Sure, leaving a few times is acceptable. But habitual, something needs to change with your life.

[@slidegirl9166]

First mom needs to hire a stay at home parent to be the one on call to pick up her kids.

[@user-rl2sm7ii5y]

This is a perfect example of employees who choose quality of life over a j.o.b.

[@californiadreamer2580]

Except when they can't pay their bills and their power is shut off and the car is repossessed.

[@denafreeborn424]

There is NO “O” in the numerical system, it’s a ZERO.

[@YouMissedBro]

Cry more

[@Frankie-tc1bh]

What?

[@e.d972]

But we all know O=0

[@praetorian5499]

Book talk 💤