"She is not actually bullied!" Why bullying is a subjective phenomenon | Beau Oldenburg | TEDxBreda

[@CryBlueofZ]

I had a boy that bullied me in high school, he only stopped when one of my friends told him to stop or she would give him something to cry about

[@christellen3077]

These loyal friends are really God given.

[@mdtisthebest6249]

She sound like the bully if you ask me.

[@CryBlueofZ]

@@mdtisthebest6249 sometimes you have to bully the Bully to get them to stop

[@Trecesolotienesdos]

but then if bullying is subejctive, then "normal" acts are then bad. One person's normalcy or good intentions can be one's negativity. When if a person is being themselves but then this causes distress in somebody else? isn't that then "bullying" the person fro being themselves? Is a person who makes edgy jokes because they're a naturally cheeky person "bullying" others, even if they dno't really have bad intent? a subjective approach to bullying doesn't work. Much of the supposed subjectivity regarding bullying is preciesly that people are different and perceive things differently. Your approach doesn't account for this. What if these people who are bullying the student were raised in harsh banter that's well-intended? Your subjective bullying paradigm will cause more trouble than it's worth.

[@christellen3077]

The feeling argument is valid yet can become a slippery slope. Because someone may suffer from post traumatic symptoms making them overly sensitive, in situation where nothing was aimed at them. It is true that putting a bullying experience into words is really hard when ine second guess himself especially.

[@jeffsmith9420]

The point she misses is that those who say that bullying is subjective are likely ignoring or lying about engaging in bullying. If for example an outside observer can look at a situation and conclude "that person is being bullied" even if they would not respond negatively themselves to the same action then the bullying is occurring. Denial is a key feature of what enables bullies to do what they do.

[@Trecesolotienesdos]

So then it leads to an overall net negative situation, since normal banter has to be masked to accommodate for others. People often label things as subjective not because they are but to look intelligent.

[@jonesjack6088]

Also an accusation bullying can some be used as a smokescreen sometimes those that cry bullying are the bullied themselves