Should You Date Outside the Faith?

If you’re wondering whether or not you should date someone outside the Faith, keep in mind that the purpose of dating is to find someone to marry. If you know you don’t want to marry, you probably shouldn’t be dating.
Taylor dated someone who wasn’t Catholic. It seemed to be going well at first, but as the relationship went on, she began to notice a serious disconnect with the guy. It wasn’t because he wasn’t an amazing person. He just didn’t have an understanding of who Jesus is. She quickly noticed that her relationship with Jesus-and the need to be with someone who also had a relationship with Jesus-was non-negotiable.
Apparently, marriages between those who take their Catholic faith seriously are thirty-one percent less likely to end in divorce (www.thegospelcoalition.org/ar...)
As Catholics, marriage is an earthly analogy of the wedding feast of the lamb. Jesus is the Bridegroom, and the Cross is the wedding bed. When we hear the words, “This is my body given up for you” at Mass, it is in fact the consummation of the marriage between God and humanity that is happening. Everything spouses experience in marriage here on earth is just a foretaste of the heavenly glory that happens at every Mass. As mentioned in another recent Ascension Presents video, true love is sacrificial, and it’s really hard to maintain a relationship with someone who does not understand that in the same way you do.
Prayerfully discern how important the Eucharist is to you. Are you willing to spend the rest of your life with someone who does not love Jesus as you do?
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[@TR-wm3sg]

Thank God my wife married a non-Catholic. After 15 years of marriage, I finally entered the Church ten years ago, thanks to her.

[@class.C]

Exactly, everyone saying it's bad when it may very well be God's will to marry someone not Catholic.

[@christinmiller576]

Retrouvaille.org

[@samanthaweydt9580]

Exactly, you don't know how God is going to use the relationship

[@lowenwelle1044]

@@class.C I Agree! Best exampel for this is Félix Leseur. At first he was one of the most aggressive atheist journalist of France. Several years later he "ended up" as a catholic priest and teacher of a certain Fulton J. Sheen. Leseur was married to a very devout catholic woman called Élisabeth. After her death his conversion began - and she forcasted it in her diary. Look it up, it´s an amazing story!

[@bdvjack9214]

T R Welcome Home

[@SaintCharbelMiracleworker]

I met my future wife at university. I was an atheist scallywag who liked to drink and was popular with the ladies. I noticed her at a house party. She was different, not dressed to please/entice, she wasn't drunk, flailing about, dirty dancing and screaming like the other girls there. I went over to talk to her and for the first time since girls started paying attention to me, I was talking to a girl who wasn't interested. She made me very nervous. She was calm confident, that much was obvious and without meaning to she made me feel unworthy and awkward. All my moves failed, my jokes bombed... I made a quick exit but it bugged me. I had to meet her again. I saw her on campus a few days later and asked my friends if any of them knew her. One said "oh yeah, that's Bridget I see her at Mass." He also said "don't bother unless you're Catholic with a capital C." I casually asked which Church and turned up on Sunday, had no idea what I was doing, people were kneeling, doing hand gestures, praying, singing and I was at the back row observing. SOMETHING happened during that Mass. I went in with one intention of meeting her again and halfway through I was surprised by a calm, peaceful, wave rushing over me. Turns out Mass happens more than once on a Sunday, she wasn't there. I returned for the next Sunday and had the same strange experience where I felt like I was going to levitate or faint. She wasn't there. By the third Sunday I knew I was attending because of the feeling I experienced there. I wasn't receiving the Eucharist, I would just sit in the back row trying not to get noticed. Then on the fourth Sunday I saw her at the 5pm Mass during the walk from the carpark. She smiled and waved at me before entering and after the Mass I went over and talked to her. The rest is history, I was smitten by her and at the same time the Holy Spirit smote me. During RCIA my priest said that what I experienced during those first two Masses was the Holy Spirit calling me out and calling me in. Calling me out by her not being attendance because I went to Mass with selfish intentions and calling me in by giving the invitation to join the Church. We have been married 15 years.

[@leamarie6039]

Lovely story❤loved the, 'dont bother unless your a Catholic with a capital C"😁 that's really funny but that's straight forward too.

[@isoldesummer5367]

I love your story!!!! God bless!

[@ez10auditore]

Just wow.

[@bdvjack9214]

cocolocooz beautiful story any children ?

[@beckyrose5880]

Scallywag 😂 beautiful story! Even scallywags can find Jesus 💕

[@LadyK007]

Those dating non-Catholics, you have to do so with the mind and heart that they won’t convert. They might and if they do, great, but the conversion should be for love of God and not to please you. The question is: Am I willing to marry this person as is?

[@amyj4283]

Auragirl86 exactly. Perfect point. If we decide to marry a person, we also have to be as willing to suffer the consequences. Good point on seeking to convert your spouse for his own sake and the love of God, and not for your sake. It’s such a difficult mindset to maintain.

[@Onlinesully]

Amelia_Hw123 For sure that's true.

[@onetallgirl1369]

auragirl86 very, VERY good point!

[@stuartbell2075]

Thanks for shaing this

[@gogogolyra1340]

If u wanna convert someone bring them to an RCIA class, dont sleep with or marry them

[@mariaangelicaarroyobernal2120]

I understand this point of view, however in my experience I started dating a guy that was open to learn about God, and after two years of discussions and learning he decide to become catholic. Now he is my husband, with a great devotion to Mary and we are seeking holiness as a missionaries together! I always had in mind, if it is from God It will not lead me to sin, so the first thing we agreed was on chastity. After a lot of prayer and love, he was able to see Jesus in the eucharist (all start from a wikipedia search to a personal deep encounter)! Thanks to that, I was a privilege to witness the conversion process of the love of my life.

[@niqhtinqale]

Deo Gratias, Maria

[@caribaez5711]

I never realized the value of wanting to marry someone who has your same beliefs. With Jesus, with love, you have everything. Catholic is good.

[@joyzb8669]

Wow I'm still praying for mine that he'd have the same divine interaction... He's Buddhist, and I like him very much but I can't say yes to him if he doesn't have Jesus in his life..

[@wfleming537]

that's great news I'm happy for you. I'm concerned for myself and don't think I'd risk it... I wouldn't marry someone who wasn't Catholic. date maybe? but if they made it clear they weren't interested in the church I'd break it off

[@mariaangelicaarroyobernal2120]

​@@niqhtinqale It is not stupid at all! I am confident that God speak to our hearts in prayer, I prayed a lot to Saint Joseph to help me see God's will. If he explicitly said that he don't want to come to the faith, it is important to find spiritual direction on the relationship to make sure you guys are striving for the same moral values for your family. And there are things that are not negociable as the baptism of the kids and participation with them on the sacraments. I want to share with you my journey of four years and hopefully it can give you some light. After two years on our relationship I started to ask myself exactly that. Although, he had so many Christian virtues and was open to learn, Jesus wasn't part of his life. I needed him to understand my spiritual charisma, so invited him to a spiritual retreat of my community Bounds of Marian Love. I wanted him to experience how I dream to have a life as a missionary serving the Lord. I was hoping for a clear answer from God after the retreat, and He did! My husband was able to encounter Jesus in a personal way and started his journey to become catholic. Thanks God, He give him an amazing priest as a spiritual director that clarify so many of his doubts! After that, my discernment was: God if you want him to be my husband I would love to, if you just used me as a servant for his conversion I also praise you. And a year after we got married and still growing on faith and love.

[@sarahzepeda1008]

I usually view it this way: the Catholic faith is absolutely central to who I am. It is inherently intertwined with the core of my being. If I'm with someone who does not recognize the faith, even if they are tolerant of it, that means I can't share the most intimate and genuine parts of who I am with the person I should be closest to! And I can't imagine that. I'm glad I found a man who not only shares my faith, but actively helps me grow in it. That being said, I do think some people can be graced with the opportunity to act as God's loving hand as an invitation for faith. A good family friend wasn't Catholic when he married his wife, and he says "she loved me into the Catholic Church" which is just beautiful. I think the patience and selflessness of these types of relationships is definitely a grace, but it only works if the person is open to being invited. There's no harm in working with someone through their struggles with the faith, but sticking around with someone who's heart is still hardened to God's invitation will inevitably have their hearts hardened to your love

[@Kristian-ql8zw]

Well said.

[@reelneat]

Thank you for this comment; so on point and will help so many folks with discernment!

[@luciadeloach9932]

Im a catholic newlywed, my husband was an atheist when I met him, but after a year of dating and being super honest about my beliefs and him being open to respecting and learning about my beliefs, he entered RCIA and became a catholic. He struggles now and again with faith because he was raised totally atheist so it’s hard for him sometimes, but overall I’m thankful that I felt led by God to date him. I prayed about it every step of the way, I was firm on my convictions, and my husband understands the purpose and value of marriage, to get each other to heaven. I see my husband as someone a lot like Thomas among the apostles, he believes but then he struggles then he believes again. It’s hard and it requires that I pray a lot for my spouse, but I would need to pray for my spouse even if he was a perfect catholic. The point is to lean on Gods guidance and trust in His blessing.

[@emilymargaretstoehr9826]

Thank you so much for your witness. All I can find are people saying "Catholic or bust" I know that it's ideal, but God CALLED Hosea to marry a prostitute. Thank God for His blessing of GRACE in yalls marriage. Praying for all converts. People don't talk much about this topic of a converted spouse and leading up to that dating a non-Catholic and freaking your community out.

[@teamarie123]

Awkward moment when you're the non religious person in the relationship who doesn't believe in it, but is willing to learn about his faith to make things good

[@makenaduffy9550]

Téa Schlager Hey, kudos to you. That’s really great!

[@alttab3694]

Wow you must really like him, hope it works out for y'all.

[@wfleming537]

haha good on you for caring so much, you don't need to believe what he believes for it to work but you do need to genuinely support him in his faith...including holding him accountable to his own beliefs.

[@tolbiny36]

^ It's so nice to see all these encouraging, kind replies.

[@BlessedLifeLoveandFaith]

You are so awesome! That's a love worth keeping when you are open to your partner's faith. You have no idea how comforting that is, whether committed or not. God bless!💛

[@FreeNationRadio]

I wish that more people made videos giving tips about Catholics dating a non-Catholic. Almost all the literature I've read on Catholic dating puts it in a negative light. The early Church had discussed interfaith marriages and it was a part of the lives due to Christianity being a minority persecuted religion (ironically like today in some ways). I feel like some Catholic commentators are steering Catholics into only dating and marrying Catholics in a way to try to plan to "save" the Church. We're not breeding livestock here; there can be very holy marriages between people of different faiths. Just my two cents.

[@monicabagonamarkande]

I am born and raised Catholic and I love the faith so much. I asked Papa Jesus and Mama Mary a lot for Their guidance on my love life. I am now married to a kind and loving Hindu guy. But he prays the Chaplet with me, goes to mass with me, says grace with me before every meal. He respects my faith so much and I respect his. I believe that love and marriage can exist between two people from different religion as long as you entrust your love to God. He will bless it and nurture it. ❤️🙏😊

[@okkk2684]

Aww I love this 💕💕

[@Yd97777]

This is so beautiful, God bless you and your husband.

[@digitalcontent6218]

Amazing, not always the case and I agree we can make it work because God's Blessing and Plan is first and then our strategy. At the same time just like we make choices based on wisdom this goes to show that with the same faith you give yourself a better chance. Thank you for your video Taylor and amazing share by @mlpb20

[@sitka49]

Papa Jesus , Mama Marry? You do realize there mother and son

[@monicabagonamarkande]

@@sitka49 Yes, of course. I know that. But my country, the Philippines, we were brought up as kids to call Mother Mary and Jesus these endearing names as Mama Mary and Papa Jesus and I guess it stuck even as we grew into adulthood. St. Joseph is also called Papa Joseph in Philippines. I think it’s sweet.

[@Bdelliumharts]

I hope all Catholics will get the partners they need and desire.

[@colleenlongua9752]

It's also important to know the difference between a catholic and a Catholic. Dating a cultural catholic can also be a big problem in a relationship. Being lukewarm in the faith can be just as damaging as not having any at all.

[@LadyK007]

So true!!!

[@drumsandcymbals8779]

Probably not just as much, probably more. Some people just don't know, but pretending to know is worse.

[@queenofhearts7726]

You make some good points and these all should be considered. However, sometimes it is our purpose to bring someone we marry into the Catholic Faith. It may not be right away, but God has His ways. I married two Catholic men, neither of whom looked at the Eucharist the same way. They both ended in divorce, one annulled and the other died after the divorce. I literally gave up on the Catholic Church and “finding another Catholic to marry”. Instead, I ended up marrying a man who considered himself “spiritual” not religious... a formerly devout Baptist. Fast forward 15 years. We decided we wanted to go to church, but which one? I couldn’t bring myself to go to any Protestant Church, so he agreed to do what was needed for me to return to the sacraments. In the process, he learned about my faith, argued with his old belief system and realized that the Catholic Church had what he was missing and indeed was the Church Jesus established. All the questions and conflicts he had as a protestant were answered and explained in the Catholic Faith! Who knew it would take a Baptist to bring me “home” and come with me, too!

[@cathyvega2606]

I married my husband a year ago. He’s Jewish, I’m Catholic. He encouraged me to complete the RCIA process, receive communion, encourages me to go to Mass, deepens my relationship with Christ. It’s good for you to share your personal experience, but I hope others find a partner that encourages their relationship with Christ. Sometimes it means they’re not Catholic. It’s so important to expand our dating, friendship, and social circles to deliver Christ’s message. If we only preach to others like us how are we really living like Jesus? My husband grew up in a near orthodox environment and we have open discussions about Christ. Something he wouldn’t have done without our marriage. It’s mutually beneficial, I could go on and on.

[@denizhanbasaran1830]

I am a Catholic and I've been with my girlfriend for almost 5 years. And we have a serious and fun relationship. We're gonna get married as well. She's is a deist but definitely not a Christian. She always helps me to understand god as well. I was raised atheist and she was raised catholic so she can understand and feel god but sometimes I really suffer reaching jesus and she helps me. I believe that's all about love and respect. God bless you and your husband 🙏

[@annagarnet1232]

I'd also add that it's important if you're a practising Catholic to marry someone who is also a practising Catholic. Not just Catholic by their Baptism.

[@ez10auditore]

Very true.

[@onetallgirl1369]

Yes and those practicing Catholics are hard to find!

[@floresliz2596]

True!

[@Rose-xk5sy]

God bless you..God bless this channel and everyone who is a part of it, for putting in so much effort to help those who are trying to get stronger in faith.

[@paulmcgorian5712]

Before you marry the one you love ask this person . Will you suffer with me ? Will you suffer for me ? . If they answer no to either or both of these questions . They will not love you enough to sustain an authentic marriage .

[@Stephanie-qi1ls]

Paul McGorian that’s a beautiful question to ask! 😄

[@jacksonrathb3076]

that's a horrible question to ask and you sound like some serial killer

[@anthonyfiducia]

Wow! Thank you, I agree whole heartedly, even if the person you are dating is Catholic, if they don’t have the same love of God be careful, I am saying this from experience. Taylor I hope to run into someone like you one day.

[@meredithwalker4435]

This is the exact video I’ve needed for a while. I’ve always wanted to marry someone Catholic so that we can agree on religion and especially raising Catholic children. A lot of times it seems like a hassle but I am trying to look at it as a blessing because I am so blessed to have the Catholic faith. Thank you!

[@nicoleyoshihara4011]

@meredith walker Same here! I want and need a practicing Catholic man to be the leader for our family. I hope to meet him soon ❤

[@AHouseDivided1998]

As someone who married an Atheist 22 years ago, there is a lot of truth in this. While my husband and I were married in the Church and have a great marriage since, it does hurt sometimes that we can’t share our faith together.

[@yichispiritual]

It’s not about what you have sacrificed in your marriage but rather: would you rather not to marry him and stay single all your life? And What keep you in the marriage? The sacrifice/hurt may or may not justify that it is important to consider marrying one not in your Faith community.

[@evelynjacob6079]

Thank you for prayerfully addressing this difficult topic

[@noelkunnath1298]

Very well put! Love the channel with each video coming out also shout out to Fr. Mike ✌😁

[@preacherjohn7]

Why would a person jeopardize the most important gift they possess, their faith, by entering into a relationship with someone who does not possess the same gift?

[@liraco_mx]

Because they don't realize they have said gift (or appreciate it), sadly.

[@justinitsthatguyme010]

The best Catholics I know seem to be converts. I'm 32 and have yet to meet one catholic girl who believes in or wants to follow the church teaching on sexuality. And I've met plenty of catholic girls...weekly mass goers, you name it. Just cause she's catholic by title doesn't mean she wants to live out the faith. I've met plenty Protestants who follow what is our teaching on sexuality but may just need a little enlightenment on catholic apologetics.

[@charlies86angel]

Simple answer: Love, i.e. God Himself. It might not even be a case of jeopardizing your faith, but a means for God to work through you and influence another human being. You might even call this part of your own mission as a Catholic. Also, if your relationship is based on the same/similar views on life (from a neutral perspective); you share the same ideas about the future; and you RESPECT and TOLERATE that other person’s faith, you’ve got a solid foundation already. Let God do His thing through you and lay your own faulty judgments and views aside.

[@class.C]

Maybe cus God called them to it.

[@adventureinallthings]

well i would not even exist never mind be catholic if my catholic grandmother has not married my non catholic grandfather , so there is that....

[@leamarie6039]

I totally agree with you here Taylor, thank you for presenting this wonderful video, truly the holy spirit is in you when you were talking about the sacrament and the holy eucharist. I used to lived in middle east where the main religion is not Catholic. However, we have many churches over there and you see Catholics gathering every Friday. I'm always alone to attend mass and go to adoration yet never have I felt alone or lonely. Then I started to develop huge friendships inside the church, it became my community and people recognized me as a single lady who goes to church alone hahahahaa...I never found a guy to date there but I found my Jesus in the eyes of so many beautiful faces, which makes my experience truly worth it. It made realized that my friends and I have such a common ground and that is to be a joyful Catholics. I saw a successful marriage with couples and I genuinely would want the same thing for myself as well, in the future. I made a conviction not to changed religion (yes, I stated with conviction!) Because it is only in Catholic that I will encounter the Holy Eucharist. That sums up my being as Catholic and I expect , at least a support from my spouse to know Jesus in the Eucharist as the source of love and devotion.

[@carlycrawford5565]

Thank you so much @Ascension Presents for giving such an inspiring single woman a series. I love all of your series but it's nice to hear the perspective of someone in a similar place in her life as me!!! Thank you @Taylor Tripodi so much!!!!

[@Cratees]

Sheesh real talk! nice to have my perspective broadcasted like this

[@niqhtinqale]

Much needed video! Thanks! I love that you refer to Fulton Sheen

[@sofiagarrahan395]

Yes! Asking the lord if he person you are dating is the one, is really important and really helpfull🙌🏼

[@amruthabibiana.d3551]

I'm so happy I received this at the right time!!

[@mako334]

Very nice speech, I will re-estimate my broken dating process. You poured new ideas in my mind. Tnx Taylor.

[@wanlongsanmarboh4717]

Thanks for this inspirational video. I shared this video with all my Catholic friends especially to those who are dating outside the faith. Surprisingly, I received some positive feedbacks about this video and yes! they would love to hear more about this.... I suggest them to check this channel in which they did. Great job with everyone behind the team. Keep them videos coming!!!

[@shuhamcharles2030]

Finding a committed Catholic partner is so hard these days

[@andrewlind3731]

It stinks as you get older, my friend. I am 40 and at The Latin Mass parish I attend, all the women over 21 are already married and are pregnant with their 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, or 8th kid

[@shuhamcharles2030]

@@andrewlind3731 I am from Pakistan. So the pool of potential Catholic women is even narrower.

[@minishadap2784]

I don't know should I agree with you or not, because personally I feel I should look into the little best that I can, so that I can at least appreciate the little good still exist

[@luuvvvu4ever692]

This is perfect timing. I just started seeing a guy who was not Catholic and unfortunately, I let it go too far sexually on the first date. I stopped him and explained to him that I'm Catholic and still a virgin waiting until marriage. He apologized and we went on a second date today. It went well and then at the end of the date he kept trying to pressure me to go back to his apartment and made it clear that he wanted it to go in a sexual direction. I said no and he seemed very annoyed. I just wrote him a goodbye text and he apologized again and said he didnt want to take my virginity but wanted to "figure something else out" on a sexual level and I told him I could not do that and that the first date was a mistake because I fell short of what I believe. I feel like the devil always tries to attack me in this area but by God's grace he always fails. 🙏

[@leamarie6039]

Men should learn to respect women's rights and choices, if hes wise enough, he could have waited longer and while waiting, he should get to know you more and enjoy the process. It works well with men of good intent. Maybe its God telling you to drop him off.

[@xty070]

You did good. Currently learning that in my walk with God I will have to sacrifice at his feet the people and things that feel good or seem good, simply because it doesn’t please him. And believe me,it is hard. Because our fallen nature tries to convince us that because something is good and makes us happy then it is automatically good. Sigh..I might have digressed a bit there. My point is, it probably stinks that you had to cut off that guy but it’s clear that you love Jesus more than your feelings or pleasures and more than that man. In the short term it stinks a lot but in the long run, it’s peace that surpasses all understanding. You can’t put a price on that. So sweetheart, you will find a Good man. One ordained by God for you from all eternity,one with whom you will raise a holy family like the holy family of Nazareth. Stay the course. God bless you .

[@hansmshamoaay]

Beautiful! Agree with you. God bless your efforts!

[@curiouslykristina]

Love the new faces on the channel! Great video 😊💓 God bless!

[@Richie016]

God's work in our life fills our necessary and extraordinary requirements while we journey with him in faith for quite some time. Thanks, Taylor, for your suggestions on dating & spouse.

[@jcpenny2438]

That was very beautiful. I know what I am looking for:) Thank you and God bless!

[@66azannor]

Thank you Taylor great message. You are a Angel. Your special person will appear. Yes. Trust the Lord.

[@jlll249]

Amazing content, Taylor. May God bless you! Greetings from Colombia.

[@stinastiggy7468]

Thank you! Sometimes you just need someone to say it out loud and then it all makes sense.

[@BlessedLifeLoveandFaith]

After watching this video, I must write something from my experience. I am a strong practicing Catholic and love my faith a lot. I met my boyfriend as an acquaintance. I found out within a few months, he didn't know too much of being Catholic, but never left me astray from it. Always respected it. Two years later, I am in love with a man who wants to learn about the faith, like baby steps. And I never pressure him to take RICA classes or to go to mass with me. He comes along with me as a way to being open and that's wonderful. My boyfriend doesn't have to be a strong practicing Catholic in order to stay with him or not. The man who really loves you will do his best and sacrifice along with you in chastity and provide his respect/open-ness to the faith. I found a keeper and he makes me so happy. I can only hope for the strong love we both have for each other would be marriage. May it be God's will. Pray for us and I'll keep everyone here in my prayers too.💗

[@acatholicgirlsguide3925]

Amen!! Thanks so much for sharing ❤️❤️

[@josephxavier8636]

Great talk, Taylor! I 100% agree with you on your opinion: how valuable/important is the Eucharist to you? The answer to that question should then guide you along making this all important and potentially life changing decision! Nice.

[@katiegunkle7498]

It’s definitely important to discern, however, having dated someone who is Catholic, I think it’s important to note that not all Catholics understand the True Presence of Our Lord! Just because they are Catholic doesn’t mean they are the right fit especially if they don’t understand the Eucharist. Discernment is hard BUT so important!

[@GuadalupePicasso]

The general teaching of the church is that it isn’t encouraged, though, in essence, is tolerated, so long as the non-Catholic spouse agrees with the children being raised in the faith. I once fell away from the faith for 5-6 years, after such repeated bad experiences of trying to date women in the faith. In the secular world, women were basically lining up to go out with me, and yet the women who I was “supposed to” be pursuing were constantly shooting me down, in ways that ranged from a simple lack of interest (or openness) to some that was downright toxic. Long story short, while I never stopped believing my faith, I certainly stopped practicing it for that half-decade. At the tail end of this period of my life, there were two particular moments where I was crying my eyes out to God in prayer, begging Him for a way back into the faith. I was so ashamed of the life of sin that I had buried myself in, that I couldn’t yet bring myself to confession, despite the fact that I knew that was a necessary step in the journey back to the Father’s embrace. The very next week, I met a young woman whom I had been digital penpals with for nearly 3 years. While we had flirted some, both being single for the bulk of this period, we both suddenly found ourselves in love, so positively caught off-guard by the chemistry that we had in person. When I said goodbye to her at the end of her visit to the US, I went to Sunday Mass that evening. My rationale was, she is a good woman; a good woman deserves a good man; I am not a good man, and the only real way to do so is to live a life of faith in congruence with the teachings of Christ and His church. The following week, after getting home, I went back to confession, unloading the massive burden of sin that was weighing me down, accumulated over those 5-6 years that I painfully spent running away from God. Here’s the catch, though: my ex was a Muslim woman from Morocco. I sometimes jokingly say that Catholic women pushed me out of the church, and that a Muslim woman brought me back. But, that is pretty much what actually happened. We were together for 2.5 years, I twice visited Morocco on fairly extended trips, and we were engaged for the final 7 months of our relationship (getting engaged in her culture was an experience all in its own right). While even today, over 2 years after the breakup, I still have largely only positive things to say about her and the relationship, and I am ever more confident that breaking up was the right thing to do. What was the main reason? A disagreement over how to raise the future kids. In Muslim culture, women are banned from marrying non-Muslim men. Thus, she lied to her family and friends about my own faith. While lying is obviously not a good thing, her reasoning was because she loved me so much, that, in her eyes, it was the only way that she could be with me. She struggled with having the kids raised Catholic, not out of disrespect for my faith or the church, but out of fear of it somehow resulting in her family learning the truth. After presenting a handful of different scenarios to her, her kind of pollyanish view of it started to crack. As did our relationship. Two things to share: first, when I came back to the faith, I never once wrestled with knowing if God had forgiven me. As I said, I never stopped believing in the faith. I went to confession, and began a life of deeper conversion, beginning to shake off the shackles of all of the bad habits of sin that I had adopted over those years. I did, however, struggle with forgiving myself. In frustration, I prayed to God about this, asking Him, “Why did you let me go down this path? Would it not have been better for me to have remained faithful?” In reply, God said to me, “It’s not that I wanted you to go down that path, but I always knew that you would return to Me. So I waited. And, here you are! Now all of those women in your past whom you sinned with have YOU to pray for them, many who have ONLY you to pray for them.” The second thought to share is in the immediate aftermath of the relationship: I wrestled with wondering if I had just wasted those 2.5 years of my life. I took it to prayer, asking God, and He simply said, “She was the vessel that I used to bring you back to Me.” At that, while I was processing the pain that stemmed from the breakup, instead of asking God if I had wasted those 2.5 years, I instead began to thank God for that relationship, as His words to me helped me to see how much that relationship was a mercy from Him to begin the healing process in my heart. I’m not saying any of this to condone or condemn dating outside of the church, but only to demonstrate how the mercy of God meets us where we are, using whatever He can to bring us back into His loving embrace. I can say that if I wasn’t open to that relationship for that period in my life, who knows for how much longer I’d have spent running away, how much deeper into sin I’d have deliberately sank? The thing is, God knew my wounds from women in the church, and God knew that they ran so deep that the idea of simply returning as a single man was wholly untenable for me. So God used a Muslim woman, meeting me where I was. Before breaking up with my ex, it dawned on me how I was afraid of slipping back into my life of sin. So I did what I do, taking this fear to God in prayer. In reply, God said, “It’s not that you will never again be tempted, and never again give into to sin; but, now you know to run to Me in the sacrament of confession if you fall, rather than to run away entirely.” God then reminded me that I had now been in the church for 2.5 years, saying, “That is 2.5 years of practice now! That practice isn’t for nothing!”, giving me a confidence boost in my faith life. I could simply sum all of this up by saying that God is love, and that He loves each and every one of us so deeply and passionately that He will meet us where we are, and never give up in striving to draw us into a deeper and deeper relationship with Him.

[@jasminedixon7960]

Please do more! Your a great speaker!👍😁

[@weallhaveanopinion]

Fantastic!!! Going to show my students. Today dating has nothing to do with marriage. It's sad.

[@RoseBaggins]

So true, it really is sad.

[@michaelinhouston9086]

I get what she is saying and she makes some excellent points but what about the thousands upon thousands of men and women that are not Catholic (but married to a Catholic) that convert after within a few years or after many decades of marriage? I would bet that few, if any, of those conversions would have taken place. And it is sad to think about all the happy, successful, blessed marriages that would have never existed if Catholics strictly followed this advice. One of my cousins is married to a wonderful guy that is not Catholic - he lives Catholic teachings more than many Catholics I know.

[@drumsandcymbals8779]

@Henry this is not exactly true according to the Catechism. "God gives each and every soul sufficient grace to obtain salvation." If someone is choosing purely for someone else, they aren't choosing God, they're choosing the person. In other words, if the person truly converts because of the marriage God would have found them anyways. At least that's what I think. But yes God intends for these people to be converted in this particular way, and denying your partner could be denying God because vocations are up to God. If you're truly looking for true love with your partner, you will find it in True Love Himself.

[@-laetitia-4631]

I think when it comes to dating and marriage (and pretty much anything else in life), you should first figure out the will of God. If He calls you to marry a non-Catholic, do it, if not, don't.

[@gogogolyra1340]

To be fair, if one is truly discerning the will of God, i dont think God will have u marry a non catholic.

[@ignatiussun3325]

For practicing Catholics, Catholicism is not only 'A' thing in life, Catholicism is 'THE' thing in life.

[@reverendcoffinsotherson5807]

For many of us, it is not. It is just something you do.

[@ignatiussun3325]

@@reverendcoffinsotherson5807 Fair & understandable. Judeo-Christianity is one of the pillars that built the Western civilization though. It would be a blessing to the modern West to see some value in Catholicism.

[@jasinwangjr8999]

This is so beautifully put together!

[@k.aymerich]

Besides discerning about marriage, other propouse for dating is learning how to love. I think this is very important too, sometimes we forget about it. Also I think each case is diferent, God can work in your faith when you are dating someone Who isn't catholic.

[@samanthaweydt9580]

I've seen this too. It's not fair to rule people out entirely either. God's ways are not our ways

[@Ezekiel336-16]

It is not fair, right, or biblical to do that since foreign marriages are not allowed. There are reasons for that, since Jesus either is or isn't our heartbeat and understanding of love. Emotional ties and strongholds are also very easy to make but VERY difficult to break so don't play games with other people or yourself. Rather guard your heart, and that of the other, with God's jealous love. In Christ, Andrew

[@Ezekiel336-16]

@@samanthaweydt9580 You're right on the latter but not the former. But the old and the new testaments affirm not marrying unbelievers, or getting mixed up with them lest they are truly open to converting. God knows best! In Christ, Andrew

[@k.aymerich]

@@Ezekiel336-16 Hi! I understand your point of view. Jesus is the source of love. If you believe on Jesus, you should love everyone, non believers too. Love is also seeking truth, if you are dating someone, and since the begining, he/she knows how important is Jesus in your Life, you aren't playing with his/her feelings. So I think it isn't good to say NO or YES right away, without knowing the situation. Like she says in the video, is the Holy Spirit the only that can guide us. Also, I would like to know where in the bible or in the catholic teachings says foreign marriages are not allowed.

[@antoniohiram_a.z.8946]

My favorite part is when you stated that we could invite the Lord into the thought of whether a Catholic person should date a person outside the faith.

[@louisesaucedo7033]

I remember at a mass, the Father said its ok to marry into an inner faith marriage because the most important thing is to marry another beleiver. That a marriage between a beleiver and non-beleiver will not work. After reading comments for people who married athiests, who eventually converted to God, that is so amazing and inspirational. Its like Christianity was always going to become apart of these then non-beleivers life, but God wanted them to find him through their spouse. That is just absolutely beautiful 🙏📿

[@kamela_yt]

Great video 💗

[@o2bnov0307]

The image you used from Archbishop Sheen was very powerful. Thank you.

[@corylemonte6811]

Wow might come off a little weird but you nailed it!! I hope there is someone like you in the near future or whenever he wants me too;) thanks for the vid - great inspiration!

[@reubenrodrigues7962]

Hey Taylor, love for India & peace of Christ Jesus. Love your videos coz you answer really relatable questions which are asked by many youth. I pray that you would be regular on this Channel and come up with many more videos.

[@renatojimenez9653]

Great timing. I have been a worried and sad for having a non corresponding crush with a non Catholic girl, and wondering "it's this God way of maybe prevent my "neglect" or apostasy of faith?"

[@HawkingRegime13]

100% agree, the only problem I've really had is finding a good way to connect with other Catholics in college to potentially date or establish friendships. Perhaps I'm simply not aware of the groups or activities most young Catholics partake in haha.

[@leamarie6039]

Try CatholicMatch.com, it's a dating site online which match you to a nearby catholic and see if he/she interest you, you can message or send emoticons, there's a minimal fee in it.

[@weallhaveanopinion]

Most Universities have Campus Ministers and groups for each denomination.

[@whatisinpi7689]

Taylor thank you for this presentation, for once I am edified. You are beautiful, please pray for me a sinner.

[@Obscurum]

beautiful video!

[@FernandoGonzalez-tf3fn]

I totally agree!!! Thanks Taylor

[@BROWULFdude]

TAYLOR!!! aww I’m glad ascension scooped you up. They finally getting someone I would want to watch. When are you going to do more videos on your channel? Start catholic vlogging, come collab with me in Portland ;)

[@BethNicholes]

My mom is Catholic, my dad is not. My parents are both wonderful. But I want the unity in my marriage that my parents don't have. I have not dated outside of the faith. :)

[@pucci_seq636]

Iam a 20 year old and I used to believe that in the long run, the faith of the spouse is important especially for the sake of the kids and how they will be raised. But I now believe that God loves everybody the same. Thats the beauty of him. God will find a way

[@CrissCHG]

Yes because it is an amazing opportunity to bring people in make them see and evangelize them and help people that are in the wrong path of life or help them get in the right path

[@amyj4283]

CrissCHG I don’t think that you should date people with the intent of changing them or evangelizing to them. If the purpose of dating is marriage, you should and need to accept and love the person for who they are, not who they can become. If you want to evangelize, become their friends.

[@CrissCHG]

@@amyj4283 but thats one the objectives of catholism take the word and the truth to the people and helping them, and i didnt Say obligate them

[@malgrosskreuz01]

The only One who can save someone is Jesus, and, quite frankly, dating a non-Catholic with the hope of converting them is really, really stupid. If your SO is thinking of becoming Catholic, take them to a good, solid, and holy priest. Don't missionary date

[@kellymuremi3401]

Having accepted the Fullness of the Faith found in the Catholic Church I know personally I would not Marry someone from a different faith. The Eurcharist, Our Lady and the Saints to mention a few is something i can't imagine myself living without. Today I was reading Genesis Chapter 27 , Jacobs and Esau regarding the Blessing. Rebekah played such an important role in ensuring that Jacob obtained the Blessing from Isaac. Our Lady too plays the Role that Rebekah played in Jacobs lives in ours so I can't imagine having a Husband who thinks Mother Mary is someone he has to tolerate for the Love of me and the saints are Just part of Catholic tradition.

[@carlitaelias3793]

Thank youu, buuuut, what happen is that person is trying to believe and even if is difficult, he's great and other areas. I found catholic men and they can love la Mess, but don't show compromise in areas that are also essencial in marriage

[@gijoe508]

Don't marry someone of a different faith. As a convert to Catholicism it has not been easy dealing with the aftermath of conversion with an incredibly anti catholic spouse with anti catholic inlaws.

[@cristinadriviera8144]

gijoe508+ My prayers for you that they all be saved by His grace.

[@MyImmaculateQueen]

God bless you for your perseverance in the faith despite all the obstacles. Win them over with love and prayer. My late great protestant grandmother mocked Catholics all her life, even used to mock her own Catholic grandchildren but she was a good woman at heart. On her deathbed she asked for a priest. Her family were about to arrange for a protestant minister but she refused and demanded only a Catholic priest. Well, one came and she gave her confession, got her blessing and then died. A lot of mocking is really people just testing and a search for the truth.

[@Julia-jm5ts]

4 years ago I was in a relationship with a strong Baptist while I was, and still am, a strong Catholic. He was a nice guy for the most part but the relationship had gotten so difficult overtime because he didn't believe in honering Mary, praying the rosary, communion, etc. He would always tell me my faith is wrong. I left that relationship when we were 10 months in. I feel like I did the right thing

[@justinitsthatguyme010]

When you're 32 and have never met a catholic girl who believes in / wants to follow the Church teaching on sexuality.. Just cause she's in the pews doesn't mean she follows catholic views.

[@sorochi996]

They exist. Exhibit A (me, lol!)

[@vee9320]

Courage! It’s not easy but there are women out there looking for men who also follow the teachings of the church. I’m 27 and I also find it difficult to find a man who is wanting to obey. What gives me hope is my friends and the couples I know who have found it. All in God’s time brother. Protect yourself from the temptations the devil puts before you because God is faithful.

[@justinitsthatguyme010]

Vanessa Perez yes thank you. It's not like I lose hope but I think anyone can understand how one can get down when it's been this long

[@leamarie6039]

Check the other churches then or try the Catholicmatch.com.

[@bryanhunkins3160]

I agree a 100% will you. My parents go to two different church and I love them but I don’t want that for my future family. I do find it hard though finding a good catholic’s to date.

[@gregoriusdamaiputra613]

Same here

[@leamarie6039]

Yep we all do. Let's not compromise our beliefs and faith folks.

[@APhandle00]

Hey Taylor, you talked about how the person you are dating should be seeking God and the Eucharist if that's the most important thing to you, because of course the purpose of dating is marriage and then heaven. As Catholics/Christians God is the most important, but I think we tend to forget that this life in the material world is a gift from God. I think that not only God but also the material goals of the person you are dating should be in align with yours as well, because aiming at God isn't as easy as it sounds. To me it seems that what the person thinks about God reflects their goals and what people think is most important. For example, the person who has a goal of establishing a vast amount of wealth, or maybe they value their work to an incredible degree, may be aiming at God, for sure, but if you do not value that goal as much, then you are seeking God in a different way from them. That's why I think it's also extremely important to not just consider if the person you're interested in values God, but also how they aim to get to Him.

[@ThatCatholicNurse]

I think dating outside the Catholic Faith is not the best. I read that Our Lady says Heaven does not approve of mixed marriages, Heaven tolerates mixed marriages. The reason She gave was that the children of such marriages may end up not being Catholic...(and more) So I don't wanna risk it. Peace!

[@HopeKing]

I think it depends a lot on the person. I am not catholic but I am a Christian. My mom and I have been studying the catholic end for a little over a year. It is so interesting yet so hard. I am 1 month shy of being half way through the catechism (it breaks it up into a year with your bible study). So far I agree with everything I have read, amazing. It is just so hard because going to protestant churches they drum tons of stuff into your head, a lot of it today is starting to be more political than biblical. Plus the catholic church is the original church. One thing really hard is the eucharist being the acual blood and body. We have is drummed minus that it is a SYMBOL not the actual thing. So you totally have to rewire your brain almost. I have never dated (I'm 24), I agree with the PRACTICING catholics belief on that 100%. I would actually would date a catholic man of I felt he was the right one. I am inclined that way, I think it would help because when you are truly getting to know one another and the passions you have, and the reason.

[@IramCoercere]

The Catholic church from now and from the time the Bible was compiled are not the same, because the church was split into two, the catholic and the orthodox.

[@caribaez5711]

I never realized the value of wanting to marry someone who has your same beliefs. With Jesus, with love, you have everything. Catholic is good.

[@onetallgirl1369]

I completely agree! Being non-Catholic is a dealbreaker for me. I was born and raised Catholic. I love the Church so much and above all I want is for my future spouse to also share my love for the church, so if they are not a practicing Catholic, don't even talk to me! lol!

[@gogogolyra1340]

Same thoughts

[@Mr._Anderpson]

Maybe its just me being an introvert, but its the image of an eternal gathering or wedding feast that makes me hope Heaven isn't all gold streets & crowds. We already know there will be trees, as the Tree of Life is mentioned. Here's hoping there are forests & places away from others. How can it be Heaven if you're miserable around people? Yeah, that's a total tangent from the video's topic, but mentioning it prompted me to think. So, will the new & improved "glorified" me suddenly like being around others?

[@ericbueneman1979]

Taylor raises some very important points in this video. As a convert to Catholicism (I converted at age 28), I believe it's the Catholic faith that should be the center of any marriage. My last relationship was with an atheist woman (before I converted); she would always work on The Lord's Day to avoid going to church. I was in that relationship for eight and a half years; I didn't realize that we were unequally yoked until I started RCIA a year after that relationship ended. In St. Paul's Second Letter to the Corinthians, we are told to be equally yoked (see 2 Corinthians 6:14-15). Sadly, God chose not to put my future spouse in my path; most of the Catholic singles groups I joined in the Saint Louis, MO area apparently have more men than women, and the selection of single women in my area on Catholic Match was severely limited. I won't date divorced women; a divorce (namely her parents) was a major contributor to ending my last relationship. I also won't date a non-Catholic (once again, refer to 2 Corinthians 6:14-15). It's like heading to the Wedding Feast at Cana only to get diverted by bad weather en route from North America to a major European airport (like Amsterdam, Frankfurt or Manchester).

[@stephenjohn8201]

I noticed 😉 you kept looking at ceiling most of the video. You addressed the topic wisely. I came across a Baptist woman, met twice. 1st time she was O.K, 2nd time she began Blaspheming Holy Mother Mary. I didn't say anything, but abandoned her. Better to be alone and silent then listening the insults of Holy Mary and Saints. God Bless You)))

[@gerarddlima]

Mary can't be blasphemed since she not God

[@stephenjohn8201]

@@gerarddlima lolzzz Who said she's a God?

[@gerarddlima]

​@@stephenjohn8201 what I meant is only God can be blasphemed

[@stephenjohn8201]

@@gerarddlima Learn the meaning of Blaspheme first in the dictionary. It means saying anything Offensive against Holy person and God. So you think Our Blessed Mother isn't Holy. Go on keep doing it as you are not alone millions of people are on this mission. Make God happy by blaspheming His Holy prophets and Saints. God Bless You!

[@syntheticteapot]

Totally agree. I'm not the type of person who wants to coax someone into a faith they don't want to be in. It's absolutely a non negotiable to me as well. If others want to date non Catholics you are absolutely justified but for me i just really can't do it...

[@billythebeard6055]

Every young Catholic should know this. I agree on all points, sister.

[@Rita-pe8vx]

I understand your point, but for me priority would be somebody who Loves Jesus and has a personal relationship with him. Which church he attends is secondary. I see Jesus not differentiating between his children.

[@amyj4283]

Rita K I see what you’re saying however, it is relevant to also realize that the divorce rate is A LOT higher for Catholics who marry outside their faith, especially when church teachings are not integrated in said marriage. Catholicism is not simply about a church. It’s a lifestyle. And if your spouse doesn’t share you’re lifestyle, it makes a GODLY marriage a lot harder (impossible even). And the thing is it’s a lot harder to simply respect someone’s lifestyle and not share it when it directly impacts yours. In the end, if you want to save your marriage, one will have to cave, and I can’t imagine how much resentment that can lead to. I don’t mean to sound patronizing. I’m sorry if I do 😬

[@flaviorodrigolomeli3936]

Agree with you Thank you

[@TheSunsfan4life]

I’m a 24 yr old who’s happen to be dating someone who’s not Catholic but is Christian. I’m very much so active in the church and have been raised my whole life in the church. My significant other on the other hand isn’t but has left her other Christian denomination. I’m so conflicted I really like her but would like to be in a catholic relationship. What is the best course in this process? Thank you! :) much love

[@leamarie6039]

Talk to jesus about your predicament😊 The Holy Spirit will see you through.

[@Waldemarvonanhalt]

TLDR: No. One or the other has to give in, or both become lukewarm in their respective faiths.

[@KiwiKiller88]

My gf is deepy religious catholic, and I was raised jewish. I am really trying to understand her religion more and even met with her priest. I asked him what I should do and he basically said the ethical thing would be to break off the relationship. I was planning on marrying this woman, but I am commited to doing the right thing for her no matter the cost. She never pushes to try and change me, but I worry I won't be able to give her what she wants in the long run despite the rest of our relationship being truly beautiful (it's hard to say this without sounding cocky, but I have a very aware grasp on healthy relationships). Should I break it off or should I stick with it. I know she wants to marry me too. Again it's hard to convey this, but this will devestate her as I know she deeply loves me.

[@cheshire_skatkat9093]

What do you do when your spouse converts to a belief that is completely anathema to your faith? Like witchcraft or Wiccan or Buddhism etc.

[@Cole-rb3xv]

I’m dating a non practicing Catholic He was just baptized. legit he respects me more then the Catholic guys I went out with. Even the no kissing on lips before marriage 😭💓 Would cry before I met him because a guy would actually have to like me for me to give up making out/kissing on the lips. A lot of guys would try to play me or think I’m crazy to do that. Thought he would think the same and dump me before we even started dating but nope he loves me for me we even have the same Badge number(found that out after dating) working in 2 separate law enforcement agencies. Thank you Saint Anthony for interceding for me. ❤

[@lucynwobi771]

I started dating after college when I knew I was in the right frame of mind; I knew what/who and wanted. I was ready to be mature putting the news of us first before mine. because I was looking for a husband, there were guys I didn't even encourage because I knew we wouldn't fit. dating someone I don't want to marry is unfair because it is a waste of our time, emotions and resources, a kind of deception.

[@riley.b.o]

What about dating outside of the Catholic Church but within the Christian community?

[@jellybeanmassey7077]

We just broke up because she believed as a protestant that I wasnt following Jesus properly. She didnt understand the eucharist

[@MatthewPalacios]

What if you come to the faith after marriage?

[@DeaThpackRicK]

Thank you for this video.. YOU MADE MY DAY!.. #CATHOLIC🙏🙏

[@georgebenitez2381]

In my opinion yes you can date someone from another faith or religion but here is the problem each must learn from the other faith or religion and there lies the problem even if there are from the same faith or religion both must have the same joy of that religion not speak of when children get in the mix. What is expected of them to learn both faith or religion or for them to choose?or there parents to choose for them? In all I personally would think it's a mistake but if they LOVE and most IMPORTANTLY UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER !!!!!

[@KiwiKiller88]

I recently was faced with this impossible decision, but as the non-catholic party. We had the most healthy loving relationship, but ultimately after learning more about her faith I realized it would be selfish to tie her to a person that doesn't believe in it. She in the end was moved by my love and deeply appreciated it. The Catholic faith puts so much emphasis on the "believe in Jesus portion or else", it's interesting to me how divisive the scripture is when compared to something like Judaism. I truthfully couldn't reconcile the idea of trying to change her views and take away from her faith from the reality that I couldn't get behind a religion that is utterly unaccepting of other viewpoints.

[@ceuser3555]

It is a difficult situation. It becomes more difficult when you both decide to get married and the noncatholic does not want to become one. It’s going to be a heartbreaking moment for the both of you after having spent so much time and just part ways in the end. For some it might be worth taking the risk, but I would rather not. Catholics should only date catholics. You can make friends with noncatholics but you should only date a catholic. Spare yourself, your date, and your future children from being caught up in this difficult situation.

[@Uploadedimages]

Answer ; NO !! 😅😅

[@yhong66]

The baseline is that the non-Catholic person should have a desire on their own for the Catholic faith or at least a desire to know more about the faith. The directionality to go closer to the faith, rather than how "advanced" in faith the person currently is, is important. It's heartwarming to see people posting about hopeful stories about how their loved ones converted. But we should be using the stories to pray for those who already married a non-Catholic spouse, not to endorse unmarried people to feel free to go into marriage with a non-Catholic spouse. I don't think it's advisable to go into something knowing that the Church doesn't recommend it (mixed marriage). Some spouses convert (Praise God), but others don't. I see it this way: Can God still make us pass the test (have a really Catholic marriage) when we haven't prepared for the exam (Chose a non-Catholic spouse)? Yes, He can. But is it commendable for us to not prepare for the exam when we have a choice to work hard (Choose a Catholic spouse)? No. Our part is to work hard (follow the Church's recommendation on choosing spouse), rather than to do what we want and hope for God's supernatural intervention to turn the situation around (spouse's conversion). We shouldn't make choices based on hopes.

[@tomgreene6579]

Can you relate marriage to the Resurrection?

[@Uploadedimages]

Hey.. i know its Jesus 😉😎 .. decerning my vocation tho still.. was recently talking to a girl, and .. eh. I dunno. She def wasnt a person of faith.. So i had to let that go.. and it wasnt morally correct for what i want.. it was a brief sinful relationship.. and. I feel bad that i gave in.. but at the same time.. it made me realize that im still drawn towards the idea of the priest hood.. and or 2ndly.. if i ever were to really date again.. it must be a woman of faith. And of THE faith.. FOR SURE !