Signs of Codependency & Steps to Recover - The Mind Journal

Darlene Lancer, author of "Codependency for Dummies" and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.
For a FREE copy of "14 Tips for Letting Go," see www.WhatisCodep.... Read Darlene's blog at www.whatiscode...
"Codependency for Dummies" is for sale in stores and at amzn.to/1BBcrWO
"Conquering Shame and Codependency" is for sale in stores and at amzn.to/37fueWd
If you found this video helpful, please share it, and don't forget to leave your comments and connect with Darlene on...
Twitter: @darlenelancer
Facebook: / codependencyrecovery
Instagram: / darlenelancerlmft
And don't forget to "thumbs up" this video and share it on Facebook and with anyone you think may be interested!
Copyright, Darlene Lancer, 2022

[@pattiakamimi0828]

Wow. Lightbulb moment at age of 70!! Over the summer, realized that I’m married to a narcissist after all these years. Today, while listening to your podcast, realized I am a codependent. Thank you so much for this material… it’s never too late to mend!!

[@DarleneLancer]

You're absolutely right. Visit my website for more resources and information: www.whatiscodependency.com

[@pattiakamimi0828]

Thinking of ordering your Codependency for Dummies workbook…would that be the best place to start the healing process?

[@pattiakamimi0828]

And thanks for your website. It will be most useful!

[@dee0731]

This is so good thank you 😊

[@DarleneLancer]

@@pattiakamimi0828 Yes, and also attend Codependents Anonymous meetings, and start therapy.

[@godzfamileeful]

Jesus has been showing all the compassion he's always had for me and he's causing me to love myself and I'm in recovery!!! I love him

[@teresa1710]

I'm so glad to have found this channel. Will be recommending it to my friends. 😊

[@DarleneLancer]

So am I. Please check out my blogs and resources at www.whatiscodependency.com

[@teresa1710]

​@@DarleneLancerI have just bought your book conquering shame and codependency and am reading it now. It is really opening my eyes to myself. I will definitely be signing up for your other platforms. Thank you so much 🤗

[@Sunny_Day1111]

This is wonderful. Thank you for breaking it down into parts that I can dive more deeply into.

[@nusfat01]

Thank you so much i have been in a deep sleep like have been doing all of this & i lost my relationship due to codependency

[@DarleneLancer]

Do visit my website to jump start your recovery by reading my blogs and using my resources.

[@amarshrivastava2753]

Excellent advice!

[@DarleneLancer]

Glad it was helpful! Learn more on my website.

[@kbrown3230]

Thank you so very much!

[@DarleneLancer]

You're very welcome! Learn more on m website.

[@dee0731]

Well explained to understand codependency for me :)

[@DarleneLancer]

Learn more on my website blogs and podcasts.

[@DwyaneWadeCounty]

Sometimes when i am socializing or engage with a certain person, or when someone is trying to get "close" to me, or maybe I am revealing certain personal information about myself, I begin to shake/shiver/tremble. I don't know what my body is trying to tell me. What does it mean? Is my body trying to alert me that the person is bad? Or do I need to stay with the feeling?

[@DarleneLancer]

It's hard to say without talking to you about it. If the person is someone you trust and feel safe with, then it may be that you're breaking through defenses to shame. When we begin to be more vulnerable, tears and trembling can happen. This is a good thing. If you don't know the person well, or are unsure, take more time to know them to see that they're reliable, caring, and trustworthy. Codependency for Dummies list criteria for dating someone, which can apply to any intimate relationship - friendship.

[@DwyaneWadeCounty]

@DarleneLancer That makes sense. But how about when a girl diagnosed with BPD is trying to use her sexuality to reel you back in after you have tried to separate yourself from her?

[@DarleneLancer]

@@DwyaneWadeCounty I think I answered that...you don't feel safe. Get "Breakup Recovery" bit.ly/1tnSKRT. See my blogs on BPD and Breakups. All the steps and tools in "Dating, Loving, and Leaving a Narcissist: Essential Tools for Improving or Leaving Narcissistic and Abusive Relationships." buff.ly/3DZ6vNI also apply to someone with BPD.

[@piouskerur]

Loved the program

[@jpthomas1029]

Everything your saying is 100% me ..

[@DarleneLancer]

You can find helpful resources on my website.

[@mystivixen5038]

What if you don't have any friends.

[@DarleneLancer]

Joining a 12-Step program like Codependents Anonymous is a great way to both heal and meet like-minded friends, as well as meet-ups, classes, and religious/spiritual groups.

[@Mindsetolympics]

What if speaking your mind means ur trying to give advice on something in the workplace that could be better LOL 😂

[@DarleneLancer]

Part of learning to be assertive means you use I statements and talk about yourself and your feelings and needs. When you don't your communications aren't effective. But there are ways to say the same thing constructively. See whatiscodependency.com/6-keys-to-assertive-communication/ Practice the steps and exercises in "How to Be Assertive" whatiscodependency.com/product/how-to-be-assertive/