Skipping School: Lua Martin Wells at TEDxCharleston

Unschooling Advocate - Lua works at the Mount Pleasant Regional Branch of the public library and has a passion for the interest-driven, child-led, organic learning style known as 'Unschooling' which she presents.'
In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

[@seafarr]

If you put children in a stressful, competitive, hierarchical environment, that's the world you'll get.

[@musicayletrasparati7944]

Yup

[@TJ-kz1ul]

So true

[@zzzh9160]

EXACTLY! Welllll said bravo👏👏👏

[@nicholaslandry6367]

Only three comments but all are in support Sounds like a shifts coming

[@ilovenoodles7483]

Unschooling teaches kids to be free thinkers and not to be ashamed of being an independent free thinker. School is a box that children of all different shapes and sizes have to fit into, whereas homeschooling is education to fit the child, not the child fitting into the education mold forcibly, that is set forth by the gov., who just gets money because your kid is away from you. As you can see, these kids have been accepted into college and are flourishing.

[@accebere]

Much thanks to the speaker for fighting their own fear of..public speaking? to deliver the message! :)

[@luawells]

If your city has a TEDx event, you can apply to be a speaker. In Charleston, about 180 people either applied or were nominated, and I was thrilled to be one of only 14 speakers chosen. Unschooling is still a relatively unknown thing, and very thought-provoking, so I think it's a perfect topic for a talk - I hope you get a chance to do it! So many people think that kids couldn't possibly do what our kids do - so we need to tell our stories - the implications for education are exciting!

[@janecooper7798]

Lua Wells thank you for the talk. It was great!

[@thanhorkashungjr.1563]

Thank you very much.

[@luawells]

Yes, unschooling is really hard for a lot of people to wrap their heads around. Kids spend a lot of time just playing, especially when they're young- play is good for kids, and they can learn a lot doing it, but it's not easy for adults to see the learning. I think the skeptical adults are convinced best when they see how the unschooled kids grow up and find their passions - that's why we need to share our stories, I think!

[@KathysClutteredMind]

Fantastic talk on unschooling. My children are 8 and almost 7 and are already passionate about so much. They love learning and exploring.

[@KathysClutteredMind]

Yup it's fabulous. This is what we do. The kids learn stuff they are interested in and follow their passions. They learn at their own pace. No tests. No schedule. Learning happens all the time, year round.

[@logan2669]

I am an unschooler and in my opinion there is no more need for public schools,the reason schooling systems started was to teach something that you can not learn by you're self,it started when people had no where to learn things.But that was a long time ago...between access to the internet and books you can learn any thing without the need for harsh schedules and judgement..."I never teach my pupils I only provide the conditions in which they can learn"-albert einstein

[@johnkim7802]

+I Am Nerd ? You are definitely correct. The whole notion of schools came to train workers for factories and conform people to society.

[@jolie5204]

+I Am Nerd Yeah, I am a unschooler as well and I completely agree with you.

[@racheldebner1955]

As a past homeschooled student and current public school student, I agree as well.

[@luawells]

You're right that people have that fear, and think that some children will only play. But a day is long, and even if a teen spends six hours a day on video games and sleeps for ten hours, that still leaves eight other hours of the day for other things. My son did little besides "play" on the computer and watch tv for years. But in the end he was drawn to medicine because of a tv show, and he was ready to work hard at it once he found his passion...

[@amcquinnmedwoman]

Thank you so much for your courage and your advocacy for unschooling. My children are so very similar to yours. My daughter, 15, is a Shakespeare lover, musician, mind-blowing artist and training to be an Olympic-level equestrian. My 18 year old son is a blue belt in Aikido, loves Parkour and has studied to be a Bowen Practitioner with his own practice as of 2 months ago. He too is planning to buy his first home before 21 keeping his commitment to himself to have no school debt.

[@CrystalOrganicFarm]

My boys are 16 and 13 and we have always unschooled. It is so good to see a positive, uninterrupted depiction of unschooling in the media. This has not always been the case, due to the editing of an interview or the reactive interviewers. THank you for having the courage to give this articulate talk!

[@factsuncensored8168]

This talk just reaffirms my decision to 'Unschool' my children. Thankyou for sharing your experiences

[@racheldebner1955]

Man, I wish I was unschooled! Right now I am stuck in my senior year of high school. I used to be homeschooled. It wasn't unschooling, but I did have a lot more flexibility. I miss it so much!

[@bluelobsterart]

Thank you for all the real-life illustrations of unschooling success!

[@1side1984]

Very interesting approach to education. I can only imagine how much further I would be in my industry given the chance to focus souly on my field. Better yet just given the chance to explore what I would be most interested from such young age. You did an absolutely magnificent job. I work for your brother Hugh and mentioned that in my free time I enjoy listing to lectures and talks and Tedx. He told me that you gave one and I had to see for myself. Thank you for this information.

[@vjhaz]

Thank you so much for sharing your family's experience! Love love loved it! Your kids sound like such interesting, unique people who are truly happy in life. What a great thing for any parent to see in their kids! :D

[@car5286]

I hope this relaxes people about the subject. So far I am only doing this for 2 months because we moved at the end of the year. I love it! but my parents are horrified. My Dad actually told my kids they couldn't have a sleep over till they were done their school work. When my kids call to chat the first thing asked is if they did school that day. It puts my kids in a position of lying and me in a position of trying to add up the things they did into subjects so they look bigger than they seem.

[@iopeace101]

That was very well done and so informative. I wish I had unschooled my boys; I think they may have enjoyed learning more. This concept sounds like the perfect was to have individualized instruction. Great talk!

[@kab9052]

Great talk. Thanks for sharing your experiences

[@jennyfischer4699]

I'm so sad, that this is illegal in Germany!

[@ajrwilde14]

protest

[@neilexploreology]

+lua wells i thank you for this video. Just recently we decided that we are going to homeschool my 2 yr old son. Right now, we are still learning the various method of teaching to see what fits best for our son. At his age he is showing much interest in things such as vacuums and washing machines. He loves watching how they work and mimicking the infomercials and also he watches how to repair them. Because of that, your unschooling talk caught my attention. My biggest question is how to unschool. Since my son is only 2, i still have to teach him how to read and write, learn math etc....how and when does unschooling takes place? As older kids do they still learn about science, physics, history, math and all other subjects and how? Thanks for the wonderful video.

[@luawells]

+Lee Won Apu Lan Hi - You asked how to unschool. Unschooling is basically living life as if there was no school. It's easier than you think! Your child loves to learn things now, right? Kids are born with a curious mind, so you help by answering his questions, reading to him, taking him places, playing with him, etc. There are some good books you can read, such as Teach Your Own by John Holt, Free to Learn by Peter Gray, Homeschooling and the Voyage of Self-Discovery by David H Albert. For a look at how older kids learn, try The Teenage Liberation Handbook by Grace Llewellyn. And there are some good facebook pages about unschooling, such as Secular Homeschool Families - UNSCHOOL, and lots more. As your child gets older, he will have his own ideas about what he wants to learn, and you will help him. He can get a volunteer job, an apprenticeship, start his own business, take classes, travel - the possibilities are endless. Best wishes!

[@luawells]

Yes, I was ridiculously nervous - not sure why - but I would have felt so much better if we'd been allowed to have a few notes - but nope, no notes allowed... It was a great experience, though

[@katjapuschnegg85]

Hello I am an Austrian student, currently editing the topic unschooling in school. It is very impressive that the model of unschooling works and it was very interesting for me to hear Lua Wells talk as an mother about this theme. Honestly I cannot really imagine how unschooling works. If you are interest in unschooling where do you start? I am wondering from the legal aspect? I thought the law prescribes that children from ages 6 through 15 must attend either public school, private school or homeschool. In public or private school you get all the basic knowledge you need for everyday life. So I ask myself if you can get this knowledge with unschooling. Have unschooling parents any plans or standards for teaching their children? I can imagine that a unschooling child have to take a lot of responsibility for their own education. However these children are more able to promote their individual abilities because they can choose what they want to learn. I like this idea of learning because there are no such strict requirements as in the generally school system. I wish I had these opportunities.

[@luawells]

Hi Katja - I'm glad to hear of your interest in unschooling! You asked about how to start, but the answer would vary depending on whether you're talking about it from a mother's perspective, or from a kid's perspective, and whether you're talking about an older kid or a younger one. Still, there's a lot of info on the internet and on facebook pages for unschoolers that you can look at. Basically, you just live your life as if there is no school. You find yourself interested in various topics, so you learn about them -- whether from books, or the internet, or from going out in the world and trying new things. If you're the parent, you introduce your kid to new people, books, ideas, and experiences, and help them do the things they want to do. And have fun! Legally, we called ourselves homeschoolers, and did what we had to do to meet the minimum requirements, which usually involved one standardised test each year, and a summary of what the kids had learned during the year. Think about things you've learned that you learned outside of school. Maybe cooking, or dance, or drama, or whatever. Maybe you learned from a friend or relative, or took an "afterschool" class, or did it on your own. That's how unschoolers learn, too...

[@Lindaguitar2]

I could have given almost the same speech. It's odd that so many unschoolers find themselves drawn to Shakespeare! My daughter - formerly unschooled and now in college (and working part-time as a lifeguard) - and I have been volunteering together at a Shakespeare theater in our city for 6 years, and getting to see all the plays for free. I wonder how one gets to do a TED talk. I'd be willing to give a talk myself and share our success stories.

[@jesslagooch5291]

It's called freedom .bravo

[@ontherockswithsalt560]

In schooling is only practical if one of the parents has a job that supports the entire family financially. With 2 parents working full time there is no time for unlimited trips to museums and traveling the world. Sounds like a rich people thing to me.

[@KMB1414]

I love Shakespeare and I learned about him in school.

[@hannahtaylor854]

Great job

[@Juan_Carl0s]

Jealous about these kids lol, personally I unschooled myself by starting to learn at school and outside of it, instead of caring about grades

[@ajrwilde14]

schools are obsolete, yes

[@neilexploreology]

+lua wells i thank you for this video. Just recently we decided that we are going to homeschool 2 yr old son. Right now, we are still learning the various method of teaching to see what fits best for our son. At his age he is showing much interest in things such as vacuums and washing machines. He loves watching how they work and mimicking the infomercials and also he watches how to repair them. Because of that, your unschooling talk caught my attention. My biggest question is how to unschool. Since my son is only 2, i still have to teach him how to read and write, learn math etc....how and when does unschooling takes place? As older kids do they still learn about science, physics, history, math and all other subjects and how? Thanks for the wonderful video.

[@annefrolov6017]

What did you end up choosing? :)

[@veritascognitio5183]

The woman sounds like she's about to cry

[@elyad_]

we have schools based on that principe here in germany and they bring out the most interesting people. the problem with those is that you don't get accepted anywhere without a graduation from a regular school. i have a really good friend who visited one of those schools and decided to become a stage actress but now has to catch up on her graduation to even get accepted at a higher educational level.

[@laylaalsharif6946]

How much work/time is required from the parent? Is it a full-time job to unschool your kids?

[@ilovenoodles7483]

Yes. It is. Just like being a parent is.

[@denisemaelumpkin]

Yes. It is. My daughter will become interested in something and I will spend hours trying to find things to put in her path to support her interests, to incorporate our family travels and outings around what her particular interest is. It is also funny because an interest can be dropped that same week, it just depends how far her interest takes her. Unschooling (to us) is very child led and very family involved.

[@blancaroca8786]

This could be very variable. In our case a few hours a day are needed... my son goes to badminton club which he likes and is great instead of forced school gym. also he does a lot of independent math and physics reading and problem exercises which he gets from books or Internet. Sometimes he watches khan academy or other stuff too. Having brothers and sisters or other homeschoolers nearby would be better but failing this we manage. Last year he chose some online courses at an internet high school for A levels, cheap and no obligations but timetables can sometimes be awkward with other activities and also due to time zones.

[@godsquad8684]

One fear people have with unschooling is it's as good as the parents are. I know several "Unschooled" teens who spend 6 hours a day watching video games. They are exposed to very little. And their parents are defensive.

[@asapmob1128]

Wow inspired me to skip school

[@Cyndel2006]

It isn't in your parents authority to do this. The education of your children is between you and your children, so long as you are following the laws of the state in which you live. Put up strong boundaries, letting your parents know in clear language what they are and aren't allowed to ask or talk to your kids about regarding education. If the insist on letting how much schooling your kids do dictate the amount of time they spend together, personally I would cut off most contact.

[@tallieallen397]

+lua wells What do you think about children who are still very young like 7 for example who enjoy just watching you tube for hours a day. Like daily Vlogs (shaytards) or toy reviews or amateur doll dramatizations. My husband has a big problem with that. "His daughter is just screening out for hours and how is that getting an education? How is that Unschooling? That sounds like lazy parenting and neglect!" So...are you for unlimited screen time? If so, is my daughter going down the wrong path by doing this? Is screen time okay as long as it's "educational"? Please lend me your thoughts. Thank you!

[@luawells]

+Tallie Allen Hi Tallie - I don't have a definitive answer for you on screentime, because we had a hard time with it, too. We tried different approaches at different times. I had one kid, my daughter, who was pretty good about self-regulating, but my son wanted a lot more tv and computer time than I would have liked. He and I fought over the limits I wanted many times, and in retrospect I'm not sure it was worth all the struggle. I think kids can learn a lot on the computer, so I wouldn't worry too much about it, I don't think. As long as you can sometimes get her outside, and to join in on family activities, and she's happy and engaged, I wouldn't worry about how much of the screen time is "educational." She's learning things, even if you can't always see it happening...

[@tallieallen397]

Lua Wells Thank you very much for that insight! I appreciate you taking the time to give me your feedback! Have a beautiful day☀️

[@heartlightintuition]

Hi Tallie, I'm curious to know how this has worked out 4 years later? I'm a teacher and in my experience when young children spend a lot of time in front of screens it does hurt their development, because young children need movement to be healthy. However as they get older (10+) it becomes a useful tool for learning. I learned an enormous amount from my time just playing around online. The interpersonal and leadership skills I learned playing various multiplayer games made me a much better teacher. There are an almost infinite number of possibilities for learning and experiencing the world online, and those opportunities keep expanding every day. As long as she's getting her physical health needs met, it's no problem.

[@raquelvargaslugo9064]

Does this mean they don't get a high school diploma? I continue to hear all the "fun" learning that is happening. BUT is there no diploma?

[@siradmin6791]

isnt it so in america that you can just take the exam whenever you like? also it isnt important to have that diploma if you attend an university

[@luawells]

Hi - we found that all the colleges my daughter applied to were fine with our homemade diploma when we described what she had done with her time. We also had the diploma issued by our homeschool association. And my daughter was accepted to every college she applied to - so there was no problem there. And before that, my kids had started taking college classes while they were still high school age, so it was clear that they were good students by the time that they officially applied.

[@veritascognitio5183]

It was a good talk, though.

[@PromiseToLoveU4eve4]

I can't say I understand the idea of unschooling in the slightest. I have been raised as a public school educated child for the past 14 years of my life and while I don't agree with the way that I am taught everything, I do think there are benefits to school that can never be learned from unschooling. I agree that if your child is extremely passionate and good at something, say music, art, performance, etc. I can completely see how a homeschooled approach would be beneficial. It would allow them more time to do what they are passionate about as opposed to sitting 7 hours in a classroom learning about things that have no importance to them. However there is an aspect of school that has absolutely nothing to do with the actual learning itself and it's the mental ability to step outside of what you are comfortable doing and learn to fail. I get that with unschooling you all believe that your children will be less stressed, they will learn what they want, and they will develop more creativity, in turn making them happier healthier children, and those are wonderful benefits. I do believe though that it is through the stress and expectations put on you in schools that a child develops a sort of perseverance and ability to do what is expected of them in the real world when they grow up to be adults and having real jobs. Now I don't mean to say in any way that every child will have absolutely no ability to work hard even when they don't want to, but I do feel that it is a vital aspect that is missing when all they do is play and learn when they feel like it. I know this is long so I will finish quickly with this, in all I really do believe that while there are fantastic benefits to be gained from unschooling, kids will not have the necessary abilities needed to do work in the real world. It worries me quite a bit seeing as you had a child who could have done anything but was never pushed to work harder than they wanted to, making them never have to r make anything better of themselves.

[@creativeog3497]

"The real world". you are so damn brainwashed. Every person gets it drilled into their head that they need to go to highschool, college, get a good job, blah blah. Watch a couple of the zeitgeist movies and stop supporting the bullshit modern day education system

[@creativeog3497]

"The real world". you are so damn brainwashed. Every person gets it drilled into their head that they need to go to highschool, college, get a good job, blah blah. Watch a couple of the zeitgeist movies and stop supporting the bullshit modern day education system

[@PromiseToLoveU4eve4]

I wouldn't call understanding a system put into place by society, being "brainwashed". I completely agree that the modern day education system is shit and that there are a lot of things that should be different, but I don't think not going to school is the answer to that. We created a world where in order to be successful, you have to have an education and there is good reasoning behind that. To be a doctor you need to know more about disease than most people, to figure out how to build more complicated technology you have to first understand how current technology works. There is an order to the madness that is the world, and while it isn't always perfectly clear, there are reasons we have our planet set up the way it is. I'm not saying that it is perfect, because it is nowhere near perfect, but it is there and it is undeniably how we have managed to live this long.

[@creativeog3497]

the system we have was made in the damn 1700's when technology and information weren't easily accessed. I can just as easily sit down on my computer and learn whatever i please, as i can by dropping thousands of dollars to get the same education. The reason the institutions still exist is because in capitalism, you need a sheet of paper that says you went to school in order to get a good job, and they make money off of the idea that education can not be received without sitting in a classroom. this "real world" everyone talks about is flawed in that way. from the get go we raise our kids to believe they cant do shit without that piece of paper saying they got an "education". My apologies for calling saying you were brainwashed.

[@christinalopez6610]

All the unschooled people I’ve seen speak are “taught” by people who’ve been educated by the school system. I wonder what the next generation will accomplish (or not).

[@5p674]

I was one of those kids and I wish to God I had been forced to go to school.

[@kcesca]

"Imagine if you tried to force a bunch of teenagers to watch Shakespeare!" You mean the 9th grade? Congratulations, your kid got a fifth of the recommended 9th grade education. What a genius. How was she accepted to all five colleges? She was studying to be a librarian! As a dying profession, it is kind of a very under subscribed degree. They would literally take the kids from the hills have eyes at this point.

[@luawells]

+TheGogobooty I'm not sure what you mean by saying my kid got a fifth of the recommended 9th grade education? How would you have any idea what all she learned in 9th grade or any other grade? I certainly couldn't have told you in a 9 minute video. And most kids, including mine, don't declare a major when they're applying to colleges, so the fact that she later decided to become a librarian (with a Masters) had no bearing on where or why she got into college. The colleges appreciated seeing a kid who learned for the sheer pleasure of learning, who read for the sheer pleasure of reading, and had a sincere interest in history, science, psychology, and so much more.

[@caseyjones1548]

But i'll tell you what, most "unschooled" kids don't learn much, most watch too much TV, only screw around and maybe work at low paying jobs

[@ilovenoodles7483]

Lol!

[@elegancworld4452]

Most are welcomed far before the welcome of a government schooled programmed kid 🤔

[@ilovenoodles7483]

@@elegancworld4452 Yep.

[@Juan_Carl0s]

Do you have any examples of that, or are they just assumptions? If you put a kid out of school (over 7-8 years old let's say, maybe less), he may start by playing video games/watching KZbin vids all day long, but he will end up getting bored and try discovering something else (they'll be much more willing to learn because they didn't go to school). Then, as time goes on, they're gonna explore things and discover a passion they're gonna learn about and work for. School discourages children from learning altogether

[@ilovenoodles7483]

@@Juan_Carl0s very true And the stuff taught in public school is mis information and fake history.

[@neilexploreology]

+lua wells i thank you for this video. Just recently we decided that we are going to homeschool my 2 yr old son. Right now, we are still learning the various method of teaching to see what fits best for our son. At his age he is showing much interest in things such as vacuums and washing machines. He loves watching how they work and mimicking the infomercials and also he watches how to repair them. Because of that, your unschooling talk caught my attention. My biggest question is how to unschool. Since my son is only 2, i still have to teach him how to read and write, learn math etc....how and when does unschooling takes place? As older kids do they still learn about science, physics, history, math and all other subjects and how? Thanks for the wonderful video.