so you DO want to be like the other girls (r/NLOG)

[@FrostedFrills]

"The easy way out" You have got to be kidding me. It's literally a major surgery. You can't even lift your own baby safely for weeks. I was personally left with a scar that to this day is painful to touch due to nerve damage. And yeah, it's also absolutely necessary in most cases. It was for me. Edit: let's not forget how much more expensive it is since you also have to stay in the hospital MUCH longer

[@ashleyduckworthyt3224]

Calling it the “easy” way out is SO insulting

[@aretoadish]

My cousin had a circumvallate placenta and you HAVE to do a C-section in those cases.

[@FrostedFrills]

​ @aretoadish I'm so sorry to hear that... my uterus is septate and a C-section was planned a couple months in advance. I was guaranteed to need it.

[@m4tta]

c-sections are terrifying fr

[@Lanthekpopfan]

exactly my mom had a csection with me.

[@pinkzaism]

"you just had the bottom of your stomach cut open" and she's making the argument that it's EASY to have a c section???that sentence is literally terrifying wtf

[@DeathnoteBB]

I think (hope) people genuinely don’t know what goes into a C-section. Doctors have to go through *7 layers* to get to the baby. People forget it’s not just skin, uterus, done. There’s you know, muscle, fat, etc. And even if it was just a couple layers it’s still *flesh* being cut open to deliver an entire baby.

[@justmeyo4589]

Right? My mom has had low muscle tone in her lower abdomen for her whole life after her emergency c section with my sister 20 years ago. They separate your ab muscles and sometimes they don't heal back the same.

[@alexj-t2331]

The fact that you get longer medical leave for a C section than for natural birth days otherwise. Plus your ORGANS GET PULLED OUT

[@bonniegomez5333]

And c section has a longer recovery time. You're not allowed to lift anything heavier than the baby, plus risk of infection, especially while breastfeeding makes it an extremely difficult thing

[@sarahnolan4700]

@@justmeyo4589Four. My mother had FOUR. Literally the most punk rock creature I know.

[@TheLilacWood]

I don't understand why people diminish figure skating and ballet, as though being graceful and wearing pretty outfits somehow makes you less of an athlete. You can be both strong and sparkly.

[@StonedHunter]

not to mention it downplays just how much strength and control it takes to be that graceful while also nailing the technical aspect of the moves. it's not just straining on the body but on the mind as well

[@Spiderscanthurtme]

They also say that about aerial silks. Do you know how much strength it takes to hold yourself in the air like that! It hurts! (But it’s also really fun)

[@excessivelyfangirlingbookw3339]

Tbh we should shift focus and force the “real sports” to become ✨more sparkly ✨ as well!

[@thehummingbirdbandit9542]

@@excessivelyfangirlingbookw3339AGREED! I had a friend who used to wear a sparkly bow in her hair when we were competing in taekwondo. She went to the Junior Olympics with that bow. Got so much shit for it, too, but she wanted to have it and no one would tell her otherwise - and they really COULDNT tell her otherwise when she swept the division!!

[@CanonSkyrissian]

yeah like have you seen kaori sakamoto? she's bloody incredible! also chinese pair skater sui wenjing is the epitome of don't fuck with me, as is deanna stellato-dudek (both world champions, the latter at the age of 40!)

[@shivvWhore]

The woman getting jealous of her toddler because the toddler takes attention away from her is insane, calling the little girl her husband's co-wife is a really really unsettling thing to say imo

[@joelleash8873]

Yeah like your child is not competition…

[@registeredjopper]

it reminds me of that husband who basically left his wife for breastfeeding their newborn. like straight up he said something to the effect of "now I have to think about how another man has touched your breasts"

[@devon345]

Especially cause young children require assistance doing pretty much anything, and babies and toddlers need most things done for them. Not to mention the supervision to ensure they don't hurt themselves. Of course the child is taking up a lot of her dad's attention! She should be! If she wasn't, he would be an incredibly shitty and neglectful father! It's also super weird that she mentioned the daughter taking after her dad in appearance, like she's really bitter about it, like her daughter owed it to her to look like her - something the daughter has absolutely no control over.

[@Chunamunch]

​@@devon345 you voiced many of my exact thoughts. If my partner and I have kids in the future, I would be estatic if they had a relationship like that with a potential daughter. Him not being attenive would be a massive red flag. This mom will feel like complete shit for dissing how her daughter looks if she grows up how I did. I looked more like my dad even though im a girl when I was born and once I was about 5 and my features more developed I became a mini-me of my mom and still look more like my mom. Then she may get jealous her daughter looks better though which is also scary.

[@RoonilWazlibLover]

F*** the woman who said having a c-section is the easy way out! I wanted to have a natural birth, but had to have an emergency c-section. It was traumatizing, I wasn’t allowed to hold my baby for over an hour, my recovery time was much longer, and my incision still hurts 6 months later. I was in labor for over 48 hours before it too. It definitely wasn’t, “the easy way out.”

[@onceuponamelody]

I had an emergency one too. It was SO hard! Sending you and your new little one much love!

[@DeadRogueGuy]

she apparently thinks you should have just struggled in labor until you DIED; then she would consider you a "real mom". A really dead mom.

[@mariahwheaton4377]

Same here! It's so hard to hear the c section slander because it's usually medically necessary and we wanted a vaginal delivery

[@inni_k7767]

I think this has a lot to do with how there is a lot of info left out about what a c-section actually is, like how can it be easy? Doctors cut about 4 layers of tissue, pull muscle apart, pull the bladder out of the way and then pinch the uterus to open it and take the baby out, then you have to pull out the placenta and stich everything up, how in the hell recovering of that is something easy?

[@A.K.N.W.]

C-section means you love your baby enough to have major abdominal surgery for them and deal with the consequences of surgery - and most people also went through labor prior to that surgery Also my incision still hurt 6 months later, my awesome ob/gyn referred me to a specialist because the pain was adhesions please know that you deserve to be referred to a specialist to help you

[@averyswitchcraft838]

The figure skating vs ice hockey argument is always so annoying, they're different skill sets!! Devaluing figure skating reeks of misogyny every time to me

[@thatcreepyfangirlstalkerch3572]

Five kids at 23?! I really hope she and her partner and kids are happy. Because if she started right out of high school, that means about 1 kid a year. Giving her body no time to heal.

[@jess.was-here]

Maybe they had twins or triplets idk?

[@thatcreepyfangirlstalkerch3572]

@@jess.was-here That doesn't really change anything. Twins or triplets would be even harder on your body.

[@jess.was-here]

@@thatcreepyfangirlstalkerch3572 wasn't trying to defend it or anything lol, i was just trying to figure out 5 kids in within 5 years, it sounds absolutely insane

[@glowa-q9b]

yeah that makes me grossed out, hope the partner is around the same age too. her frontal lobe isnt even developed, jesus

[@henriette2446]

​@thatcreepyfangirlstalkerch3572 but maybe she had triplets at 16 and twins at 22 or something

[@excessivelyfangirlingbookw3339]

I believe every woman has had a “not like other girls” phase, because this “phase” included not wanting to be seen as this hypersexualised, one-dimensional version of women we often see in media. Then, we grew up and realised that every woman has to go through that stage because our societal perception of womanhood is still pretty messed up. …..some women never leave that stage and it shows 🤷‍♀️

[@Hana_H]

You really hit the nail on the head

[@lyndsaybrown8471]

I did in high school. To be honest, it was jealousy. I was overweight so I didn't fit the expected mold of what " girls were, per societal expectations.

[@lilmorsecody]

I'm slowly starting to realise that being afraid of labour is a valid reason to not want kids. I havent heard others say this until recently. I grew up getting the message it was the worse pain imaginable yet somehow totally fine and worth it and not that hard. The more ive learned about it and others experiences Ive read I just do not want to do it. It terrifies me being so vulnerable and in pain and truly awful things can happen. Respect to the women who go through it, but I dont feel like its a weak reason anymore to not want kids. To say its not a good reason is to dismiss how traumatic and horrific labour and birth can be. Im so glad women have shared their stories more so i could get educated. Truly nobody tells you otherwise.

[@roseduste80]

As well as the other physical impact pregnancy has on the body. -Totally valid reason. I know two women who nearly died during or after childbirth. One happened several days later, once she was home. Her husband found her bleeding out on the floor.

[@palemeadows]

@@roseduste80also, you shouldnt have children if you dont hsve the money or know how to raise one

[@Peerless_cucumber]

Any reasons you don't want to have kids is a valid reason

[@aalmondmilk]

same. adoption is always there if i change my mind about parenthood as well

[@jem3848]

I have no desire for children, and the pain and mutilation (and danger) of childbirth certainly do not sweeten a sour prospect for me.

[@tweedlebug123]

i feel so bad for figure skaters, ballet dancers and cheerleaders- they're such difficult, skilled disciplines that both men and women partake in, but people undermine such sports so hard because they're "feminine" all three can be outright painful and/or dangerous.

[@yeetlydeet8282]

Exactly! Plus, I’m pretty sure ballet dancers and figure skaters especially have like very strong legs from practice n stuff

[@LeotheLizardKwing]

I’m not like other girls. Sometimes, I’m a boy.

[@puppxl4485]

Lmao Sameeeee

[@DeathnoteBB]

F1nn?

[@sassylittleprophet]

In my case, I'm not like other girls because I'm enby

[@my-name-is-faith]

slay

[@Angieurmom]

me fr fr

[@allye9865]

Ugh my C section wasn't planned; my baby was upside down and it was too risky to give birth vaginally. I really dislike the "real mom" discourse

[@ChaosTheoriesLuxe]

@allye9865 Same. I had an emergency C-section. I guess I'm not a real mom because I had major surgery to save my baby and actually spend time with my kids without sticking an Ipad in their face. My mom can't be a real mom either because she adopted us. Despite that, she worked multiple jobs a day to support us after my daddy passed. But if some very, very special ladies give birth vaginally, apparently, they hand them a certificate that says "Real Mom," a "world's greatest" Mug, and a device with zero parental controls set for their newborn. Sorry. These women really, really piss me off.

[@rebeccaramsey1274]

I had an emergency c-section, 24 weeker, footling breech. Due to the vertical uterine incision it required, I had no choice in having subsequent babies by c-section. These women that think I'm not a real mom can f all the way off.

[@undetermined1804]

When I was born the umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck TWICE. My mom dilated that far, and I still had to be removed via c-section. And she could feel them slicing through her since the medication didn't work as intended. These people just want to feel better about themselves for no reason whatsoever. Pathetic.

[@anerdygoldenagesoprano]

Dancers, skaters, gymnasts and cheerleaders not only wreck their bodies, but they have to look graceful while doing it

[@Hana_H]

Literally

[@melotone_ale]

It is wild to me that the “co-wife baby” lady doesn’t see her husband giving their child attention as him just being an active parent and not leaving her to handle all the childcare.

[@Chuck_EL]

As someone who dated women who had mothers like that because they looked like their father it causes lifelong insecurity issues

[@tanyastacy-haws993]

She’s incredibly lucky to have a partner who wants to be a good parent. It’s sad she doesn’t see that as a positive.

[@lyndsaybrown8471]

Narcissism is wild.

[@Whatisthisgremlin]

Me and my sis are C-section babies & hearing that whole "C-section was an easy way out thing" baffled me. Dawg its a surgery where they *open you up*.

[@JHorn1985]

Right??? I prayed really hard to not need a C-Section because Just the Idea of It terrified me. C-Sections can be so dangerous, and the recovery sounds brutal. My former Mother in Law had one at 16 years old, after 59 HOURS of labour. Absolutely horrifying.

[@Rose-jz6sx]

They cut through SEVEN LAYERS!!!

[@emilymgemily]

performative sports are SO much harder than team sports because you not only have to do the moves, but you have to look PERFECT doing it???

[@Hana_H]

LITERALLY

[@snickerdoodle11111]

lol this is crazy haha. Id much rather skate on ice than have a 350 LBS 6'9 hulk run at me with intent to lay me on the ground.

[@Beeperoni]

I’ve never had a kid, but I did have surgery on my ovaries that resulted in 3 very small incisions. That recovery was BRUTAL. Imagining it on a much bigger scale while also having to take care of a newborn is INSANE!!!! C section mom’s are impressive as hell.

[@chelledoggo]

I'm not a "beauty guru" by any means, but even I know there's a difference between the specially formulated "muds" that are in mud masks and spa treatments, and literal mud that you just find in your backyard.

[@lilmorsecody]

I saw once that mud is sometimes used in desert climates to cool down, both the people and animals do this! but its deffo not for cleansing and purifying😂

[@ChaosTheoriesLuxe]

​@@lilmorsecody Pigs do this. But we humans don't do this in the part of the desert I live in. Most of us have A/C or fans for that.

[@lilmorsecody]

@@ChaosTheoriesLuxe ofc i didnt mean anything bad, i saw it somewhere years ago and thought it was cool lol

[@Zectifin]

dirt can have terrible stuff in it. Tetanus comes from bacteria in dirt, not specifically from rusty nails. the reason why rusty nails are so associated with tetanus is that rusty nails have a very textured surface that the bacteria can live on and they are often found in the dirt in construction sites and will likely puncture a shoe.

[@ChaosTheoriesLuxe]

@lilmorsecody No worries. I didn't think you did. Pigs are the only animal I can for state that I've seen do this. Back in the day, it is assumed some tribes did use this technique for the reason you said, but not for a couple of hundred years.

[@teaganmorningstar6105]

How does the first one already have me livid!! My sister had to have an emergency c-section for my beautiful twin nieces and we still almost lost all three of them. It is a necessary medical procedure to save lives! How can people be this twisted

[@jenf8941]

I got into figure skating for 6 months in my early 20s and that s*** is HARD. My muscles would be just as sore from a good practice session as an intense gym workout. And the injuries you could get are serious too.

[@melotone_ale]

Right! I’ve gone to an ice rink a couple of times just for a weekend activity and my thighs were killing me the next day

[@snickerdoodle11111]

Yea you look like someone who can really handle physical training lmaooo

[@StonedHunter]

Idk I'm pretty concerned about a woman having FIVE kids by the age of 23. That means she was starting the process at roughly 17/18 and having them nearly back to back (or she started having kids before 18). That is a huge amount of strain to put on a body and mind, especially a mind that's still developing. Not to mention how she's likely never going to college or doing anything to give herself security for if/probably when her husband leaves her in 20 years for a younger woman...

[@therealhanjisung.ayedomino]

As someone who has been dancing for 12 years, i have been told MANY times that its not a real sport. um. if its not a sport, how come i can barely walk after conditioning? how come skz choreos make me so tired lmao?

[@Zectifin]

its only a real sport if you can create a billion dollar company out of it to sell sports jerseys.

[@therealhanjisung.ayedomino]

@@Zectifin exactly 💀

[@snickerdoodle11111]

Bro cant walk after bodyweight training. Actually sad asf. Unless ur a girl, then its fine.

[@lyndsaybrown8471]

​@@Zectifindon't forget alcohol sales. If you can't cater to drunk people who will fight in the parking lot, it's not a sport.

[@KatherineAcosta20]

So many parents have difficulty with differentiating familial and romantic love, it’s super weird

[@excessivelyfangirlingbookw3339]

Right? It feels really incestiuous 🥴

[@nikobaehr3638]

Are they by chance religious? Specifically practicing Christians?

[@glowa-q9b]

straight, religious ppl tingz

[@wb8695]

​​@@nikobaehr3638would you mind elaborating on how that applies to Christians specifically? I'm a religious Muslim but I don't get this insane confusion between familial and romantic love. Of course they're different!

[@kateluvya]

When I left my ex after he cheated on me, he said he felt like I was doing it to punish him. Like, no, dude, I'm leaving you because you are a disgusting piece of trash who "used" his friend's (he swore that she was just a friend and he was over there so much because she was going through a rough time. Plot twist: she thought they were friends, he was a creepy stalker for months after she broke off their friendship because of this) he "used" his friend's dirty panties that he just happened to find (and smell- yuck). Like, of course I'm leaving you, dude. Plus, I had figured out I was at the very least bi (turns out, full on lesbian) and would have left him eventually. And he was abusive. So, trifecta!

[@Zectifin]

wait, so he cheated on you and then was caught sniffing the other womans panties?

[@Kursinn]

I heard somewhere one time that pick me behavior is the first step of internal feminism because we see how women are portrayed in such singular and shallow ways by the patriarchy and this desire to be seen as different from the patriarchy’s definition of feminine and girlhood is really a desire to be seen as an equal and as an individual by those in power in that system which would be men. I think that’s a great explanation and helped bring a lot of healing for me for when I used to be an embarrassing pick me when I was young.

[@lyndsaybrown8471]

I think when it continues into adulthood, it's from a sense of not caring about others in general and becomes internalized misogyny. So, good for you for progressing and seeing the "pick me" phase for what it is.

[@TheMya1988]

I was a gymnast, and also had to take several dance classes, especially ballet (and I would never belittle ballet dancers). There were also figure skaters in those ballet classes, and though I never saw any hockey players, they could definitely benefit as more fluid movements could enhance movement in nearly every sport). I know many (American) football players, basketball, soccer, etc. all take various dance classes to enhance their gameplay. As someone who loves the tumbling aspect of gymnastics most, I can sincerely appreciate the level of difficulty in ballet. I also have ice skated and played ice hockey for fun. While I would not say one is easier than the other, figure skaters need far more discipline and balance than hockey.

[@TeagueisTrash]

If your husband is giving the kind of attention you get from him to his daughter that might be a problem

[@TomokoPerfect]

Damn, the first one and it already pissed me off... I had a C-section and it is in no way the 'easy' way out of childbirth, it's dangerous, damaging and the recovery time is much longer than from natural birth, area around my scar was numb for about two years, it can cause issues with starting to breastfeed and just freaking sucks. I always get unreasonably mad at people like that first post 🤬 Ok, rant over, back to the rest of the video 😅

[@ashleyduckworthyt3224]

You’re spot on. My friend was rushed to have an emergency c section and it was extremely traumatic on her body. I hate when women put other women down for shit like this. That story had me FUMING too.

[@w1tchb0n3_r10t]

the figure skating and ice hockey girl have crushes on each other and jealous of each other in a wlw way

[@Hana_H]

I’d read that book/watch that movie

[@onceuponamelody]

Not the very first one triggering me. I had an emergency c-section because my kid and I both nearly 💀. Birth and pregnancy is no effing joke. I would never tell a person who had a child any way that they weren't a "real" parent because they didn't do it the same way I did...in fact, I hope NO ONE has to go through a traumatic birth experience EVER. These people are seriously wild, and need to go socialize more IRL.

[@StonedHunter]

I'm so sorry you had to go through that. :( I hope you were able to have a smooth healing process from that experience.

[@onceuponamelody]

@@StonedHunter thank you. ❤️‍🩹 I think the trauma will be with me forever, but it does get better.

[@countrycrossstitcher3573]

My daughter was facing the wrong way and her heart rate tanked. We would have both died as well. Medical advances are amazing! Our grandmothers wouldn’t have survived.

[@thelittlestpika]

When I was in my NLOG phase (before realizing I'm not a girl), I had some extremely toxic friends because we were the "same kind of different." Of course, I eventually realized these girls were horrible to others and me and cut them off but I was trying so hard to not be in a box that I just ended up making myself miserable.

[@aliceb.1481]

The "easy" way out: Going into labour and after hours or even days of contractions the doctors start looking concerned. After even more time in pain, they whisper about the heartbeat getting fait and slow. They start yelling orders at the nurses and you're rolled into an OR but they don't want to upset you so they don't tell you what is wrong, they just say it's fine buuut they're gonna cut you open (even though you wanted a natural birth) and if you disagree they inform you that you and the baby are probably both gonna die if you don't agree. They then cut you open (depending on the urgency they put you under so you're asleep, or just numb your lower body so you're awake). They rip open your belly and take out multiple organs to be able to get to the baby. They then rush the blue little thing to the NICU before you can ever hold your new baby like other mothers can. You just lay there, hoping it survives as the surgeons put back your organs and stitch up the massive wound that will leave you unable to walk for days and unable to carry anything like even your child for weeks. There is pain and bleeding if you move wrong and you have a scar forever. You might not even be able to have another child safely if you're unlucky. Yeah, so easy. What a terrible thing for the baby to just come out when you push instead of slowly dieing inside you because the ambilical cord has wrapped around their neck or something.

[@williamwhalen746]

A great movie that directly addresses figure skaters vs. hockey players is the romantic comedy "The Cutting Edge." In the movie, Doug Dorsey (D.B. Sweeney) is heading to the Olympics as a hockey player. A head injury leaves him with a blind spot. Meanwhile Kate Mosely (Moria Kelly) because of her temperament can't keep a partner for her doubles figure skating. Her coach decides to partner her with the hockey player which leads to a wonderful dynamic between the athletes. One of the interesting aspects is Doug learning just how difficult figure skating is. "Toe Pick."

[@bloodybutterflygaming1242]

In hind sight, I feel like my "Not like other girls!" phase was the initial peek through of processing my gender identity that I didn't have the self awareness to examine and bottled up for another 15 years to finally figure out in my early 30s that I'm non-binary. 😅 Edit to add: on the c-section one. I was a c-section birth. My mom was in labor for over 2 days before the doctors picked up on the fact it wasn't an issue of her not dilating: it was a matter of this barely 15-year-old girl's pelvis not being wide enough to pass the baby safely. By the time they cut me out, my head was misshapen from them having insisted so long on her doing it the "natural" way ignoring what was best for both her and my health.

[@kelpie394]

Same lol, I was not like other girls, turns out I'm a man.

[@reggielovesswimming]

THIS!!

[@Zectifin]

I don't blame anyone for going through an NLOG phase when they were younger. the patriarchy trains women to do that and you're still figuring things out.

[@babephom3t]

I’ve been in ice rinks my entire life. I played hockey because my body genuinely cannot handle figure skating- my connective tissue disorder makes it IMPOSSIBLE to figure skate at the level I’d want to. Most figure skaters are out of the professional world by 18-20 unless they’re coaches. Why? Because the sport literally DESTROYS THEM. Figure skating rips you up inside, constantly, for YEARS. It leaves lasting injuries and physical effects. If you fall off of that conditioning and try to get back into it cold turkey you WILL hurt yourself- there is no if, and, or but. My whole life I’ve loved skating and hockey and I know for a fact after working at a rink that figure skating will be worlds more strain and stress on the human body than hockey. Hockey players in the NHL learn to skate from figure skaters. Figure skaters are masters of momentum, energy conservation, and stamina. I can’t stand when people think it “isn’t a sport” because if they tried it they’d end up face first on the ice or worse.

[@noizthegoblin]

I used to be "not like other girls" to the extent that I would brag about not wearing make up or even brushing my hair. And then I went to college and met a wider variety of people than were in my rural town. I realized that we were all just trying to be unique in a world where all women and girls were reduced down to just their gender.

[@MikeHawk-c5t]

@@noizthegoblin VVomen can never be unique :) you’ll always be the center of the bell curve

[@noizthegoblin]

@@MikeHawk-c5t oh hello again, Mike.

[@jray5907]

23 and 5 kids is wild. I'm 33 and I can hardly take care of my 1 cat 🥲😂

[@mallowhoney]

If my mom hadn't had a c-section I would have died lol. She kept going into premature labor like, 4 months along. She had to have her cervix sewn shut and be on total bedrest for months. She lost all her teeth due to pregnancy hormones. Still 8 weeks premature, I went into fetal distress and they did not have time to unsuture her cervix and hope all would go normally from there. I was extremely premature and on top of that, born with allergies to latex and penicillin, which is a problem in the 90s. 11 days in NICU. Tell me my mom isn't a real mom. I dare you. They all act like a c-section is just a tidy little elective surgery you have to get out of pushing. No, it's horrible, gory, and permanently alters your abdomen inside and out. I've watched a C-section before when I wanted to become a midwife. It's like a murder scene.

[@colleena6671]

Cervix sown shut???!??! That sounds like a nightmare.

[@mallowhoney]

@@colleena6671 it's called a mcdonald's suture if you're curious. my mom has had a really difficult and painful history in regards to childbirth and she would have done anything to have me survive i think.

[@MastigosAtLarge]

I literally almost actually died before/during/after both of my c-sections.

[@alxotl]

I always get so mad when someone says ‘X isn’t a sport’. Like seriously?! Just because two sports aren’t the same or even similar doesn’t mean that one isn’t a sport while the other is. Figure skating, cheerleading, and gymnastics are only three types of sports out there. And all are their own types of challenging! Those people that claim ‘X isn’t a sport’ or ‘X isn’t that hard’ seriously need a reality check. Like oh my gods.

[@elenamartinez7301]

Don't forget that the abdominal massages they have to do after birth STILL HAPPEN after a C section and you're expected to get up and move around in the hospital after major abdominal surgery

[@mindy5769]

The hockey vs figure skating one cracked me up because there's multiple movies about it. My personal favorite is the cutting edge. XD

[@emilydavis9915]

as someone with a kid, i am telling you not to have 5😂😂 at least not that quickly. kids need LOTS of time, energy, love and patience. people shouldn’t be collecting them like handbags especially before your frontal lobe is fully formed. just my opinion though🤷🏼‍♀️

[@LirioTheConductor]

My mom had to have c-section births for all of her pregnancies because doing the "natural" birth would've killed her... But, I guess she took the easy way out... If the hard way was to die

[@SamanthaOnABantha]

I was born by c-section, because my mother was haemorrhaging and if they hadn't performed a c-section to get me out of the way she could have bled to death. Easy way out, my arse. It's major surgery! There are no easy options for childbirth, they all suck.

[@lilmochalovefox480]

I look back to when I was young and did the nlog thing. Now I feel like that was me just trying to make myself feel better for not thinking I fit into the new place I'd moved to (my family were the only black people town), once I made friends who didn't care about my skin color and felt I belonged somewhere, that need to be different left. What shocks me is adults still exhibiting this behavior.

[@emmerile]

About the first post: what does she think a C section was invented for??? It's not about convenience, your muscles get cut in half so you can get the baby out to not die. It's about survival, and certainly not a walk in the park. Source: I was 3 days overdue and would have ended myself and my mom if they didn't cut me out of her.

[@Mazey_Disneyfan]

The ‘My Kids aren’t ____’ I filled in the word ‘real’😂

[@asmidgeofunruly]

CW for graphic description of medical procedures. On the subject of C-Sections, I don’t think people who haven’t had one and have never looked into it understand just how horrific the procedure is. The surgeons are actively cutting through your skin (3 layers, epidermis, dermis, and hypodermis), your fat, the muscle and everything attached, and then into the uterus. They separate your muscles to access the uterus, move the bladder out of the way, then pinch the uterus or make another incision to deliver the baby. And to top it all off, most c-sections are performed under REGIONAL anesthesia (epidural/spinal block) - meaning mothers and people who have the capacity to give birth are completely conscious the entire time. I don’t know about yall, but even if I’m getting something as simple as a nail piece removal done, I’m incredibly anxious the entire time, the experience of being numb is incredibly overwhelming, stressful, and overall uncomfortable. How terrifying do you think it might be for those who get C-Sections and have to go through that? These procedures can have lasting consequences - nerve damage, a serious impact on self esteem, etc. I will never understand this back and forth. All mothers and birthing parents are valid no matter what had to happen to deliver their children.

[@claida339]

The first one should have asked for a C-section then if it's so easy and convenient. Also she should NEVER tell that to my mom who was left with a belly that looks like two halves since a botched C-section in 1980. She was so sad about it, she's hated her stomach for two decades afterwards. And that was even with my dad's constant reassurance that she was the cutest and a scar made her look slightly different in this specific part of her body, but not look worse in the slightest.

[@cyanide_crow7970]

Ok the second one got to me because I look so much like my dad and my mum constantly insults me about it because she's hated him ever since they got divorced. I was twelve when this started. I am now eighteen. And my mum has been hurting me for six entire years because I look like my dad. This definitely has not affected me at all.

[@Zectifin]

mud girl is going to die from tetanus. Tetanus comes from dirt, not rusty nails, its just that rusty nails have a lot of pores and are likely to puncture your shoe/skin.

[@freckledandred]

I wanna be exactly like other girls because they are all so pretty and so smart and so talented and I’m gay for them

[@briannaobrien4419]

Kiwi of the Queerness, are those gummy bear earrings?! 😂 I'm dyiing, I love them so much Oh they're frogs! THATS EVEN BETTER!!!!

[@441MsVanillaRose]

You might consider taking a B12 supplement. After 30+ years of being vegan, I found that my B12 levels were low. But some tablets restored me.

[@T.D.8]

C-sections are massive and major abdominal surgery. The recovery is FAR longer and harder, just naturally because it's major abdominal surgery.

[@tabbynakamura]

I did volley ball and track as a kid. I would BREAK myself if I had tried to do ballet at that time simply because those are two VERY different sports. One if not better than the other. I wanted to do ballet but like, man I have first stage rigor mortis 🤣

[@SarahBullard-c4l]

My sister had c section after over a day of induced labor. after she was under a thermal blanket and was so pale I thought she was dead. She had to wear a medical corset for months to keep her guts in. How the fuck was that the easy way?

[@Stain73]

I had a big "Not like the other girls" phase in my early teens. I was socialised as a girl, and because I am autistic ( I didn't know that back than), I never fit in. And so I thought, if I can't be like them, then I have to be better. That phase was a mix of internalised mysogony and jealousy. I couldn't and still can't wear makeup, and when I was younger, I just thought, "That must mean makeup is useless and ugly." I just banished and looked down to everything remotely feminine. Now? I know that I'm really different, but not because "girly" things are bad. I learned a lot through videos, books, etc. I think many people who are socialised female and struggle to fit in go through such a phase, the problem is when you don't grow out of it. I'm happy, that I knoe can see pretty Makeup and be impressed, that I can say "Your dress looks awesome", that I can even wear some feminine things on my own, that I can appreciate women and typically feminine stuff. If you are 14 and go through that phase, I don't really blame you, its' not a good phase but a lot of people have it, if you are 20, you should have let that phase behind you.

[@FoxGameCZ]

Ice hockey players tend to play the sports to their 50s, and gymnast and ballet dancers are jnow to retire much earlier. The sports have very different demands. And it's not unusual to hear about gymnasts/balket dancers retire due injuries.

[@Err0r_c0splay]

9:29 and like the whole point of feminism is being able to let women do what they want with their bodies, so no jenna, we don’t care that u have 5 kids at 23. We hope it’s your choice to do so and your able to do so comfortably! 😭

[@forgotmyname4807]

My mom had both natural n c-section, n to her c-section was always the more harder one, because natural birth, her body slowly can get back to its natural way after expanding. But c-section there is big gash, an open wound, u cut like 10? Layers of her body to fetch the baby out, and not to mention the insane blood loss that goes from giving c-section. On top of it, not all, but tons of c-section happen emergency, so was moms, so like theres that panic of the baby or/and mom not making out alive out of it. And the recovery after that was soo long n worse than natural ones. So yeah it wasn't the 'easy way' out

[@Jessica-f5c]

The whole not letting your kid self like pink is so relatable. I was kind of a lil ugly fat girl so I felt I couldn’t like girly things for some reason…I think I internalized all the fat shaming of the 2000s. So I focused on other stuff like being smart or funny. Pink is my favorite color and I don’t deny it anymore! 😭🩷

[@ishathakor]

my mom had a c section and while i obviously don't remember any of that because i was a baby, she describes the recovery process as pretty much the most excruciating thing you can imagine. they had her on painkillers for a bit but she didn't get sufficient pain management and her entire abdomen had just been cut open and stitched back together so the recovery process was hell. also, a lot of them are emergency procedures. my mom went into labour (induced) on her due date, but it had been too long since her water was broken and they had to operate for health reasons. if you're only looking at the moment the baby is born it might be easier but generally they are both incredibly hard. also like, having a hard birth isn't a badge of honour. it just sucks ass.

[@darkstarr984]

I use bone broth for cooking and also enjoy a coffee. They’re completely different things, no need to drink coffee but also why drink bone broth? It isn’t tasty unless you add in a ton of vegetables and herbs first. Bone broth is loaded with protein other stocks don’t contain. But best thing to do is just get bone-in, skin-on meat then pull out the bones once it’s done cooking and you can optionally eat the skin (I can’t, the texture bothers me too much).

[@pineapple_smoothie17]

Is it just me, or why does NLOG sound like a really obscure file name.

[@Hana_H]

Kinda

[@CanonSkyrissian]

@ the female hockey player: do a double axel right now. hell, do just a single axel. do a bielmann spin. do a spread eagle.

[@Vividlbeauty]

My sister had a seizure while birth(and lots more complications) so she needed C-section Saying that it's a easy way out is so disrespectful

[@dr33murrluvsanime]

I had a NLOG phase before realizing my gender is a demigirl-tomboy MESS. also i was bullied a lot by feminine girls in school, and started purposefully seperating myself from anything and everything they did/enjoyed because of it. I still havent worn a dress in maybe 2 years because i was called ugly when i did once upon a time

[@yarnpenguin]

I went through a NLOG phase as a teen, because I was horrifically bullied and ostracised and I was lonely and angry. Turns out I'm a) not a girl and b) autistic.

[@booterfly6367]

Thank you for accurately describing a c-section and not holding back. People don’t know. I’ve had two, once emergency and once planned. My scar still hurts but I’m proud of my scar, my beautiful babies came from it. I had panic attacks during both, I was numb from the waste down and I couldn’t move a muscle which is great for the procedure, absolutely terrifying experience. I could see blood reflected in the light above me but I didn’t say anything bc i didn’t want them to move it and not be able to see as properly so I just closed my eyes really tight. Both times I was basically in and out of consciousness. When the pain meds wear off, it feels like someone lit you on fire. Honestly probably bc they kinda did. They have awesome technology now to cauterize the cut and sew it with dissolving stitches. They last however long and you don’t have to come back to get them removed. But I think when my nerves “woke up” they felt some of that cauterizing. My emergency one had a much longer recovery time, my second planned one didn’t. I could walk pretty okay after, slowly, but I didn’t need a walker like I did before. A message for any expecting parents, it is so scary, probably the most terrifying thing you’re gonna experience, but you are going to be so amazed with yourself afterwards. You are so strong and it is okay to be scared.

[@Zectifin]

I don't blame any teen girl who goes through an NLOG phase. As a nerdy guy who was bullied in high school we alway shit on the jock guys and nobody starts calling guys who were bullied in HS problematic for shitting on popular jocks. I feel like sometimes making fun of NLOG girls is bullying the bullied. The problem is when the NLOG girls grow up and keep doing the NLOG thing to other women who are just trying to survive the patriarchy.

[@applepatronum4934]

I feel sad for women who feel the need to do that...

[@441MsVanillaRose]

Yes, some C-sections are planned. They're not always done "privately". They are done for very sound medical reasons that were foreseeable before the mother went into labour.

[@marachnoch3rry]

Exactly. Like how misinformed do people have to be to hear c-section and be like "you took and easy way out"??? My mom took the ONLY way put with me. I was literally about to come out feet first and a natural birth would probably dislodge both my arms or hurt my mom real bad

[@LovingNothing]

To the person who thinks vaginal birth is the only way to give birth and get bragging rights, I'd just like to point to the woman who survived a SELF-INFLICTED CESAREAN SECTION with no sanitation, medical training, electricity, running water, medical equipment OR ANESTHESIA: "An unusual case of self-inflicted cesarean section with maternal and child survival is presented. No similar event was found in an Internet literature search. Because of a lack of medical assistance and a history of fetal death in utero, a 40-year-old multiparous woman unable to deliver herself alone vaginally sliced her abdomen and uterus and delivered her child. She was transferred to a hospital where she underwent repair of the incisions and had to remain hospitalized. Mother and child survived the event. Unusual and extraordinary measures to preserve their offspring sometimes moves women to extreme decisions endangering their own lives." (but comparing traumas is totally beside the point; just don't gatekeep motherhood 🙃)

[@lowercasebadguy]

23 wity 5 kids is ridiculously wild Im 22 and i hope i never have kids

[@namel3ss_crow916]

me and all my siblings had to be born through C-sections because of medical issues with us, like she was in serious pain afterwards and her body never properly recovered from it. like one c-section must have been bad enough but she had to have three and now she barely has any feeling around that area because of the surgery. its not the easy way out of having a child. its a traumatising experience and I cant even imagine what it must have been like for my mum to go through all of that let alone anyone else who had to go through that. natural births would still be difficult but that woman needs to have some basic empathy and understanding like I haven't gone through either but I can grasp that they are difficult either way any way of having a child is difficult there is no easy way out when it comes to it. That was so disrespectful.

[@jaydenheppenstall3376]

Definitely agree with this being a common phase at least in large part because society makes liking "girly" things inferior... but since mid to late teens the joy doing my room purple and glittery for the first time since it was pink when was a very small child and other bits like that has brought... absolutely love it! 😅

[@iggythegoo2531]

bone broth lady must have alot of chest pain... that sounds like so much sodium

[@AmyRuby]

I’ve had an emergency c and planned C and I’ll say that while the planned one was far and away easier, especially in recovery than the emergency one but it is by no means a cake walk. I hate the no labour no birth, I’ve done both and they are both hard in different ways.

[@scarletgoldenthorn]

“I scared her off bc I drink bone broth!!!” Does this woman actually think that drinking SOUP intimidates anyone???

[@NFSMAN50]

These are all so wild and crazy. 5 kids at 23!!! wow!

[@TheInvisibleGirl24]

6:19 they make it look ‘easy’ which means they’re doing it at such a high skill level.

[@Deviantmedusa]

Hi reformed pick me girl here 😂I can't believe I ever thought I was better then other girls for "not being like other girls" spoiler alert I actually was 😝I'm so glad I got over viewing women as 2d like I'm very much like other girls in many ways but I'm also different in other ways but that also doesn't mean I'm better. I'm am so glad I got over that crap. Now I have healthy relationships with gals and guys alike.

[@Kit-Kat16]

So slay of you

[@koko_24bun]

besides c sections also being extremely painful and difficult for everyone involved, nowdays youre basically forced to have a c section. my mother wanted to have all natural births but since most women due to shit like this ask for a c section, nurses dont even know how to do natural birth anymore. all 3 of my mothers birhts were extremely painful and unnecessarily hard because the staff majorly fvcked up!

[@LucyFitzgerald]

I always enjoy watching these videos and they always bring me joy

[@Qüəer_intentiøns]

I've been in the punk community for only a few years now, and esp over the past two yrs at highskl, I've changed a lot. I've learned a lot of shit because I've realized that no matter what, because I'm nd I'm going to be bullied anyway, so I may as well be bullied while being true to myself. Both in style, music tastes, beliefs, and personality. The biggest thing for me is having learned how to have myself as a priority and leave ppl if they're being shitty to me. I've had the same friend group for about a year now and were all pretty close knit, but in the sense that they were all completely different people but were all close, and we all get along regardless. Because of them, I know now to not take any shit from people that only want me to fail, but it's been a process, the entire 10 yrs that I've been at skl.

[@StacyGandy]

Some of these are just unbelievable😂

[@nerouo]

for the "my kids aren't" section, after that there is an emoji of a rocket that is hard to see. I think it implies "my kids aren't autistic" which is so fucking gross ;;

[@draconicgremlin7484]

My mom almost died and had emergency c-sections with both me and my younger brother. The recovery time for a c-section is a LOT longer than a regular birth aswell. Both have their pros and cons but dear god…

[@ROYALRAT123]

I was genuinely not into the same things as my friends and peers as a teen and my nlog-ness came from the anger I felt for being made fun of and left out of things like parties or friend groups because of it. I started to feel like well what makes them so special, after all I used to be praised for my creativity and personality then all of a sudden I was the weird one. It was both the boys and girls expectations for me to look and act a certain way that really rubbed me the wrong way, I wasn't really a pick me or hardcore nlog but I definitely felt the need to defend myself and isolate because of my experience and I think a lot more girls go through this than we realize and they just never grow out of that phase of feeling the need to defend their different-ness and feel validated. I wont lie it still crushes my heart a bit when I can't make friends or share interests with others and get a bit bitter about main stream music, culture, beauty standards ect. I try not to judge but I think the nature of otherness in society especially as a woman pushes you towards feeling the need to

[@vg1384]

my mom had 1 kid natural and 1 C-section. She said natural birth hurts during but you're fine in a few days but sections hurt for months on end

[@petermj]

“easy way out” meanwhile my mom was about to d*e so she had to have an emergency c-section with my brother and to avoid that same situation, scheduled a c-section two weeks before her due date for me. yeah, so so easy! i’m sure she felt such a sense of calm in those situations.

[@isaiahwall3689]

I just want to bring awareness to the mental health issues ( sometimes severe) associated new parents adjusting to sharing their partner’s attention with the new child. It can get really bad being sleep deprived and stressed out while trying to to figure out how to take care of a child, and all you want is to have your partner comfort you but they are also stressed and sleep deprived. It can take a long time to recover from this and there’s a lot of couples that don’t make it.

[@LiamODonovan-l6e]

I'm always excited to watch your videos. You are awesome. Love your channel

[@finch3333]

Ok, as someone who's mother thought beef liver was the best multivitamin-no the hell it isn't. It gives you vitamin a, and that's about it. I feel so much better now that I'm taking the cheap Costco multivitamin and iron supplement (yay iron issues)

[@karreelindenmayer56]

I had an 8 pound baby and i was stuck in labour for 14 hours with contractions but not progressing past a 3. I cried so much about having the c section and even at 4 months post partum my scar still hurts and is healing. Frustrating to the core.

[@Zaddy-Lu]

My mom had 6 children. I was her 2nd & an emergency c-section. All the rest were vaginal births at home. My youngest sibling was 10 pounds 8 ounces. During her 5th or 6th month of pregnancy, the muscles cut to pull me out tore at the incision.

[@koko_24bun]

i do calisthenics, gymnastics and yoga with a bunch of streching, and believe it or not, calisthenics takes the last place on the rank of difficulty. second is yoga and streching, gymnastics gotta be 1st, but im also dyspraxic so theres a bias